November 14, 2022 • 13 mins
Dear Steve and Shirley, I’m married to a man that is 3 years my senior and he is causing me so much anxiety. His first wife is a big girl and the woman he dated after his divorce was thick too. When we met, he called me nicknames like “lil bit” and “tiny tot” so I asked him if he had a problem with my size. I am 5’3 and I have a tiny frame, but everything is proportionate. He has been making me feel like I’m not thick enough........................................
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
It is time now for the Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEFM dot
com by clicking submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading
your letter live on the air, just like we're gonna
read this one right here, right now, and you never know,
it could be yours. It could be yours. Buckle up
(00:24):
and hold on tight. We got it for you here.
It is Strawberry Letter. Thank you nephew. Subject what does
she have that I don't? Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm married
to a man that is three years my senior, and
he is causing me so much anxiety. His first wife
is a big girl, and the woman he dated after
his divorce was thick too. When we met, he called
(00:46):
me nicknames like little bit and tiny Todd, So I
asked him if he had a problem with my size.
I'm five to three and I have a tiny frame,
but everything is proportionate. He has been making me feel
like I'm not thick enough. His ex wife is still
a big part of his life. They grew up together
and she's very close to his mother too. We can
(01:09):
be having dinner at his mother's house and the ex
wife will pop in to say hello. It was fine
at first, but now it's giving me a lot of
anxiety because I think my husband is secretly having an
affair with her. I overheard him and his cousin talking
about how his ex wife is controlling and lazy. Then
my husband said that there was something that always kept
(01:32):
him coming back to her for years. What is it
that kept him going back? What does she have that
I don't. I own a creative dance studio and I'm
at home. I'm a home health nurse part time. When
we got married, he told me that he would support
me leaving nursing altogether so I could focus on my
dance studio. That has not happened. Instead, he paid off
(01:57):
the car that he bought his ex wife before theirs,
He said he owed her that I take great care
of my man, and sex used to be great between us,
but now he rations it out to me. He has
told me I need a little more cushion for the pushing,
and I'm sure that means that my booty is too
(02:17):
small for him. I blame all of this on his
big boned X. What does this chick have that I don't. Well,
I guess booty for one. But I think your husband
needs to stop making you feel some kind of way
because he prefers big boned or curvy women. You're you,
(02:41):
and by the way, you sound like you have a
you know, a petite, cute, little body, tight dancers type body.
There are a lot of men who would find you
super attractive, you know, So please stop comparing yourself to
his ex wife and do not change or blame yourself
for who you are. People come in all all different
shapes and sizes. We know that because that's the way
(03:03):
God made us. It's not you, it's your husband. If
he is cheating with his ex like you think he is,
then that's on him, it's not on you. So again,
please don't blame yourself. The ex knows exactly what she's doing.
She's being messy. She just happens to drop by when
you guys are at his mom's for dinner. Oh really,
(03:24):
it's disrespectful to your marriage and it's disrespectful to you.
Your husband and his mother could make her stop if
they wanted to, and he should care about how it
makes you feel, but he doesn't. And the fact that
he paid her car off and said he owed her that.
Why does he owe her that? And now he's rationing
out sex to you? Who does he think he is?
(03:44):
I think you need to think about if you still
want to be married to a man you feel is
cheating on you with his ex. I think it's time
for you to let him know that you feel you
know how you feel about sis A big bone, That's
what I think, Steve Wow, Well, well, the subject of
the letters, what does she have that I don't? I
(04:05):
think we are to just answer that question to get
on with this letter because it's filled with what she
got that you don't. I'm gonna read it to you.
Can you tell me what you think she got that
you don't have. His first wife is a big girl,
and the woman he dated after his divorce was thick tooth,
(04:29):
big girl. Thick tooth. Your name at the end of
this letter for her was big boned X. Let's start
with that, because you your nickname is a little bit
and tiny tot. Tiny tot is a small hash brown.
(04:56):
That's what a tiny tot Tater thought, saying that's where
they got the name from. You are nothing but a
tator top. He wanted that hash if they bring out
at dinnis the one that covered a quarter of the
plate and it's got extra potatoes mashed down and shred
(05:20):
and his hanging over the side. Really really, he won't
waffle house hash brown chump covered, diced and sliced. Had that? Yeah,
that's what he liked. Now, he didn't mess around and
tried since he didn't have no luck with him, so
(05:40):
he didn't win it. Got the little tator top. You're
five three with a tiny frame. Everything is proportioned, buddy,
making you feel like you ain't thinking enough. His ex
wife is still a big part of his life that
grew up together. She's very close to his mama too.
We'll be having dinner at his mama's house and ex
wife just pop up to say hello, really hello. She
(06:04):
said that first it was fine. Wait wait wait wait
wait wait? How is it that she pops over there
every time y'all at dinner to the point where you
were saying, first it was fine. Either he's saying I'm
gonna be a mama's house or the mama going here,
go your chance? Yeah, she coming over here with Stanley.
(06:28):
Here's your chance? Where something tight? Girl? Get you back.
You know you was always my favorite. Hold that thought, Steve, Yeah,
hold that thought. We'll have Steve's response coming up in
twenty three minutes after the hour. Part two. Today's Strawberry Letter,
subject what does she have that I don't? We'll get
(06:50):
back into it right after this. You're listening Morning show,
Come on, Steve. Let's recap today's Strawberry Letter. The subject
is what does she have that I don't? Well, the
question I'm asking the whole letter is what does she
have that you don't? And I'm gonna read it to
you In the letter, his first wife was a big girl.
(07:12):
The woman he dated after divorce was thick too. You
are five three with a tiny frame. Your nickname is
a little bit and tiny tot. Tiny tot is a
derivative of tater tot. Tater tot is a derivative of
hash brown potatoes. Now, when you go to tennis, it
come out it looked like a pancake. Is mashed down
(07:33):
and shredded potatoes. But to have hens that hang over
the plate. If you go to waffle house and you
get the hash browns, you get them chunk, smothered, diced,
and sliced. Lord you can't do that with a tator tot.
So now what does she have that I don't size? Now?
(07:55):
What else does she have? His ex wife is still
a part of his life. They grew up together. She's
very close to his mother too. We could be having
dinner at his mother's house and the ex will just
pop up and say hello. Every time you over there
having dinner, the ex pop up. Now either he's telling
them he going over mama's house. Oh, mama going. You
(08:17):
need to get over him? Stand they coming with her?
Something tight? So what else does she have that you
don't a close relationship with the mother? Yeah, but now
this is calling you the anxiety because you think your
(08:39):
husband is secretly having a fab with her, because you
overheard his cousin talking about his ex wife controlling and lazy.
Then my husband said that was something that always kept
him coming back to her for years. What is that
that kept him coming back? You asked? She asked in
the middle, What is that that kept him coming back?
What does she have that I don't? Whoa little girl?
(09:02):
Little girl? Look, she's she's his wife. She has throwing? Pop?
Does that mean she has thrown? She has enough stuff
where she can throw it. See the little girl fire
three tiny friends. You ain't got nothing to throw. She's
a dancer. She can't throw it though, throw what her hips?
(09:22):
What everything? She can slang it when it landed, Make noise,
throwing power, all that's happened. What does she have that
(09:45):
I don't the ability to make noise? Yeah, I want
to create a dance studio, and I'm a home health
nurse part time. Right there, there goes something else. He
don't want nobody dancing. He don't care nothing about that,
and he don't need no at home health nurse. He
ain't sick. She got skills. When we got married, he
(10:06):
told me he could support me leaving nursing altogether so
I can focus on my dancer. That ain't happen. Instead,
he paid off the car that he bought his ex
wife for that desert. He said the older that that's right.
You gotta keep her happy, because she kept him happy.
She was overpowering and lazy, but she was throwing in.
I take great care of my man. That sex used
(10:27):
to be great between us. Now he rashes it out
to me because he don't want to hurt you. Oh really,
he don't want to hurt you. He has told me
I need a little more cushion for the pushing. I'm
sure that means that my booty's too small for him,
(10:49):
and probably is true. Man's just right for somebody, but
it is too small for him. But what he'd been
used to doing is big and thing. See you kind
of like you you at burg just say see you
at bigger key. He like a double whapple. That what
(11:09):
he whipper junior is on sale for eight nas double
whipple and folde dot. Yeah, but he's standing there looking
at that me and that double whopper. He don't give
a damn with his pholde dot. He don't give a damn.
He's got to pay for his call. It's a double
whopper because the junior whippers on sale, A nah said,
(11:32):
don't nobody to go to Whapper, Go to nobody, go
to burg Ken, get the junior whipper. They cain't take
junior whop off from me. All your trips to burg Ken,
have you ever ordered the junior whipper? Never? Why why Joe?
(11:52):
Nobody go to McDonald's and get the small frapp Even
though it's the same amount of fry eyes in the bag,
it's the same amount of fries. It's just the corton
is bigger at the bottom and it pushing the fries
up to the top. It's the same scoop as one
scoop going to the bag and one scoop going to
(12:12):
the thing. I'm just busting McDonald's. It's the same amount
of fries. It's the same amount. You can look it
up online. It's the exact same amount. I've seen it
done before I worked it. Brook. I like whoppers, I
don't like junior Wapper. Now where we had in this letter,
you are junior Whapper should stay? Then? Well he was
(12:34):
having trouble managing the double whap well, so he tried
the junior wopper so he thought he could handle it better.
But now he ain't happy. I don't feel sorry for him.
Well three four bites you you threw it the junior whopper.
You're still chewing on that whapp double waper? Okay? On Instagram?
And Steve, what did you have that I don't? She
(12:55):
got two padded special soft letters che strubberries that are crazy.
She's a big bag. You can also check out the
Strubbery on demand now coming up at forty six minutes
after the hour we'll have sports talk with Junior State
and Shake. You're listening to the Stave Harvey Morning Show.
It is time now for the Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEFM dot
com by clicking submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading
your letter live on the air, just like we're gonna
read this one right here, right now, and you never know,
it could be yours. It could be yours. Buckle up
(00:24):
and hold on tight. We got it for you here.
It is Strawberry Letter. Thank you nephew. Subject what does
she have that I don't? Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm married
to a man that is three years my senior, and
he is causing me so much anxiety. His first wife
is a big girl, and the woman he dated after
his divorce was thick too. When we met, he called
(00:46):
me nicknames like little bit and tiny Todd, So I
asked him if he had a problem with my size.
I'm five to three and I have a tiny frame,
but everything is proportionate. He has been making me feel
like I'm not thick enough. His ex wife is still
a big part of his life. They grew up together
and she's very close to his mother too. We can
(01:09):
be having dinner at his mother's house and the ex
wife will pop in to say hello. It was fine
at first, but now it's giving me a lot of
anxiety because I think my husband is secretly having an
affair with her. I overheard him and his cousin talking
about how his ex wife is controlling and lazy. Then
my husband said that there was something that always kept
(01:32):
him coming back to her for years. What is it
that kept him going back? What does she have that
I don't. I own a creative dance studio and I'm
at home. I'm a home health nurse part time. When
we got married, he told me that he would support
me leaving nursing altogether so I could focus on my
dance studio. That has not happened. Instead, he paid off
(01:57):
the car that he bought his ex wife before theirs,
He said he owed her that I take great care
of my man, and sex used to be great between us,
but now he rations it out to me. He has
told me I need a little more cushion for the pushing,
and I'm sure that means that my booty is too
(02:17):
small for him. I blame all of this on his
big boned X. What does this chick have that I don't. Well,
I guess booty for one. But I think your husband
needs to stop making you feel some kind of way
because he prefers big boned or curvy women. You're you,
(02:41):
and by the way, you sound like you have a
you know, a petite, cute, little body, tight dancers type body.
There are a lot of men who would find you
super attractive, you know, So please stop comparing yourself to
his ex wife and do not change or blame yourself
for who you are. People come in all all different
shapes and sizes. We know that because that's the way
(03:03):
God made us. It's not you, it's your husband. If
he is cheating with his ex like you think he is,
then that's on him, it's not on you. So again,
please don't blame yourself. The ex knows exactly what she's doing.
She's being messy. She just happens to drop by when
you guys are at his mom's for dinner. Oh really,
(03:24):
it's disrespectful to your marriage and it's disrespectful to you.
Your husband and his mother could make her stop if
they wanted to, and he should care about how it
makes you feel, but he doesn't. And the fact that
he paid her car off and said he owed her that.
Why does he owe her that? And now he's rationing
out sex to you? Who does he think he is?
(03:44):
I think you need to think about if you still
want to be married to a man you feel is
cheating on you with his ex. I think it's time
for you to let him know that you feel you
know how you feel about sis A big bone, That's
what I think, Steve Wow, Well, well, the subject of
the letters, what does she have that I don't? I
(04:05):
think we are to just answer that question to get
on with this letter because it's filled with what she
got that you don't. I'm gonna read it to you.
Can you tell me what you think she got that
you don't have. His first wife is a big girl,
and the woman he dated after his divorce was thick tooth,
(04:29):
big girl. Thick tooth. Your name at the end of
this letter for her was big boned X. Let's start
with that, because you your nickname is a little bit
and tiny tot. Tiny tot is a small hash brown.
(04:56):
That's what a tiny tot Tater thought, saying that's where
they got the name from. You are nothing but a
tator top. He wanted that hash if they bring out
at dinnis the one that covered a quarter of the
plate and it's got extra potatoes mashed down and shred
(05:20):
and his hanging over the side. Really really, he won't
waffle house hash brown chump covered, diced and sliced. Had that? Yeah,
that's what he liked. Now, he didn't mess around and
tried since he didn't have no luck with him, so
(05:40):
he didn't win it. Got the little tator top. You're
five three with a tiny frame. Everything is proportioned, buddy,
making you feel like you ain't thinking enough. His ex
wife is still a big part of his life that
grew up together. She's very close to his mama too.
We'll be having dinner at his mama's house and ex
wife just pop up to say hello, really hello. She
(06:04):
said that first it was fine. Wait wait wait wait
wait wait? How is it that she pops over there
every time y'all at dinner to the point where you
were saying, first it was fine. Either he's saying I'm
gonna be a mama's house or the mama going here,
go your chance? Yeah, she coming over here with Stanley.
(06:28):
Here's your chance? Where something tight? Girl? Get you back.
You know you was always my favorite. Hold that thought, Steve, Yeah,
hold that thought. We'll have Steve's response coming up in
twenty three minutes after the hour. Part two. Today's Strawberry Letter,
subject what does she have that I don't? We'll get
(06:50):
back into it right after this. You're listening Morning show,
Come on, Steve. Let's recap today's Strawberry Letter. The subject
is what does she have that I don't? Well, the
question I'm asking the whole letter is what does she
have that you don't? And I'm gonna read it to
you In the letter, his first wife was a big girl.
(07:12):
The woman he dated after divorce was thick too. You
are five three with a tiny frame. Your nickname is
a little bit and tiny tot. Tiny tot is a
derivative of tater tot. Tater tot is a derivative of
hash brown potatoes. Now, when you go to tennis, it
come out it looked like a pancake. Is mashed down
(07:33):
and shredded potatoes. But to have hens that hang over
the plate. If you go to waffle house and you
get the hash browns, you get them chunk, smothered, diced,
and sliced. Lord you can't do that with a tator tot.
So now what does she have that I don't size? Now?
(07:55):
What else does she have? His ex wife is still
a part of his life. They grew up together. She's
very close to his mother too. We could be having
dinner at his mother's house and the ex will just
pop up and say hello. Every time you over there
having dinner, the ex pop up. Now either he's telling
them he going over mama's house. Oh, mama going. You
(08:17):
need to get over him? Stand they coming with her?
Something tight? So what else does she have that you
don't a close relationship with the mother? Yeah, but now
this is calling you the anxiety because you think your
(08:39):
husband is secretly having a fab with her, because you
overheard his cousin talking about his ex wife controlling and lazy.
Then my husband said that was something that always kept
him coming back to her for years. What is that
that kept him coming back? You asked? She asked in
the middle, What is that that kept him coming back?
What does she have that I don't? Whoa little girl?
(09:02):
Little girl? Look, she's she's his wife. She has throwing? Pop?
Does that mean she has thrown? She has enough stuff
where she can throw it. See the little girl fire
three tiny friends. You ain't got nothing to throw. She's
a dancer. She can't throw it though, throw what her hips?
(09:22):
What everything? She can slang it when it landed, Make noise,
throwing power, all that's happened. What does she have that
(09:45):
I don't the ability to make noise? Yeah, I want
to create a dance studio, and I'm a home health
nurse part time. Right there, there goes something else. He
don't want nobody dancing. He don't care nothing about that,
and he don't need no at home health nurse. He
ain't sick. She got skills. When we got married, he
(10:06):
told me he could support me leaving nursing altogether so
I can focus on my dancer. That ain't happen. Instead,
he paid off the car that he bought his ex
wife for that desert. He said the older that that's right.
You gotta keep her happy, because she kept him happy.
She was overpowering and lazy, but she was throwing in.
I take great care of my man. That sex used
(10:27):
to be great between us. Now he rashes it out
to me because he don't want to hurt you. Oh really,
he don't want to hurt you. He has told me
I need a little more cushion for the pushing. I'm
sure that means that my booty's too small for him,
(10:49):
and probably is true. Man's just right for somebody, but
it is too small for him. But what he'd been
used to doing is big and thing. See you kind
of like you you at burg just say see you
at bigger key. He like a double whapple. That what
(11:09):
he whipper junior is on sale for eight nas double
whipple and folde dot. Yeah, but he's standing there looking
at that me and that double whopper. He don't give
a damn with his pholde dot. He don't give a damn.
He's got to pay for his call. It's a double
whopper because the junior whippers on sale, A nah said,
(11:32):
don't nobody to go to Whapper, Go to nobody, go
to burg Ken, get the junior whipper. They cain't take
junior whop off from me. All your trips to burg Ken,
have you ever ordered the junior whipper? Never? Why why Joe?
(11:52):
Nobody go to McDonald's and get the small frapp Even
though it's the same amount of fry eyes in the bag,
it's the same amount of fries. It's just the corton
is bigger at the bottom and it pushing the fries
up to the top. It's the same scoop as one
scoop going to the bag and one scoop going to
(12:12):
the thing. I'm just busting McDonald's. It's the same amount
of fries. It's the same amount. You can look it
up online. It's the exact same amount. I've seen it
done before I worked it. Brook. I like whoppers, I
don't like junior Wapper. Now where we had in this letter,
you are junior Whapper should stay? Then? Well he was
(12:34):
having trouble managing the double whap well, so he tried
the junior wopper so he thought he could handle it better.
But now he ain't happy. I don't feel sorry for him.
Well three four bites you you threw it the junior whopper.
You're still chewing on that whapp double waper? Okay? On Instagram?
And Steve, what did you have that I don't? She
(12:55):
got two padded special soft letters che strubberries that are crazy.
She's a big bag. You can also check out the
Strubbery on demand now coming up at forty six minutes
after the hour we'll have sports talk with Junior State
and Shake. You're listening to the Stave Harvey Morning Show.
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