April 14, 2022 • 13 mins
Dear Steve and Shirley, I’ve been married for almost 9 years to a man that would rather buy me things than talk to me and spend time with me. We have a boat and other water toys and that’s how he spends his time. I can only imagine how women must flock to him when he’s at the lake because I can smell their scents on him whenever he does come home...............................
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Well, it is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and
if you need advice on relationships, on dating, work, sex, parenting,
and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM
dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be
reading your letter live on the air, just like we're
going to read this one. You hear that pop pop
right here, right now, and it could be yours. You
(00:24):
never know, you never know. Buckle up and hold on tight.
We got it for you here it is Strawberry Letter.
Thank you, nephew. My boyfriend is a show off. Dear
Stephen Shirley. I've been married for almost nine years to
a man that would rather buy me things than talk
to me and spend time with me. We have a
(00:44):
boat and other water toys. That's how he spends his time.
I can only imagine how women must flock to him
when he's at the lake, because I can smell their
scents on him. Whenever he does come home, It's all
fine and good because I've got a maintenance man on
the side and he keeps me occupied if I need companies.
I am growing really fond of this guy, but I've
(01:07):
had to pull back from him. A little bit. He
calls himself my boyfriend, and I'll always correct him. He
has hinted that my husband is probably a cheater and
hopes that it will make us closer. I can see
through the bs and I don't like when men gossip,
but this guy is special to me, so I overlooked it.
What I can't deal with is how he tries to
(01:28):
one up my husband and everything he does for me.
It became obvious over the Christmas holidays when my husband
sent me to the spot for an entire day. I
was unable to I was unavailable to my maintenance man
for hours, and he was losing his mind. So a
week later, he sent a massage therapist to my house
(01:49):
while my husband was there. My husband gave me a
diamond pinky ring for Christmas, so he turned around and
got me a bigger diamond band for Valentine's Day. I
can't tell my husband where the gifts come from, and
I can't explain to my coworkers why my office is
always full of fresh flowers. I've asked my maintenance man
(02:10):
to stop being a show off and stay in his lane,
and that really hurts his feelings. I think he's hoping
he can woo me away from my fabulous lifestyle and marriage.
But that will never happen. How can I tell him
he's ruining the fun in our relationship? What are you doing? Seriously,
(02:35):
what are you doing? You have a husband, you have
a boyfriend, and you need help from us with what.
I'm trying to figure that out. It's not like you're
trying to fix your marriage or anything, because you're already
set in your letter. You can smell other women's sense
on him talking about your husband, and it's fine and good.
It must be, because why aren't you out on the
(02:58):
boat with him? You never mentioned that you left that
part out. Why you aren't spending time. I know you
said he doesn't talk to you and all that, but
something must be going on. Why you know, besides that,
why you don't go out there or anything? You just
let him go. I think you love the attention you're
getting from both of these men. I think you love
the gifts, and I think you're playing a dangerous game
(03:19):
here and listen, Please don't be stupid for one second
and think that the grass is greener on the other
side with your side piece. I think he'll continue his
generous gift giving until you know decide if you do
to leave your husband, then all that's probably going to stop.
He's in competition with your husband. He's trying to woo you.
(03:42):
Like you said in the letter, you're the pawn here,
not the prize. This game won't be as exciting if
you leave your husband. Okay, so please don't give up
what you're already calling your fabulous lifestyle and marriage. I
hope you mean that when you say it, that it
will never happen. I do hope you mean that. And
you ask, how do you tell that he's ruining the
(04:03):
fun in your relationship? How do you tell him that? Well,
you won't have to if you leave him alone and
talk to your husband about your marriage. That's what you
need to do at this point. Figure out what's going
on there, Steve, this letter is just a bunch of
bass less I don't care. I don't got other things
(04:28):
to do. Man trying to be a good grandfather now
and all is here trying to talk sense into my
kids and dogs. I ain't got time for this, lady,
and this mess sheet and created. My boyfriend is a
show off. Why do you have a boyfriend? Let's just
start there. We got a whole letter that don't even
(04:50):
have to be a damn letter. If you would just
fix the problem, you can't upset it a thousand times.
You can't fix what's wrong in your house outside your house.
You've been married nine years to a man who would
rather buy you things than talk to you and spend
time with you. We got a boat, other water tours,
and he spends his time. I can't. I can only
(05:12):
imagine how women flock to him when he at the lake,
because I can smell they sent on him whenever he
does come home. Okay, right there, right there is where
we need to address. Shirley said it. Why you ain't
on the boat, Why you ain't at the lake, Why
you ain't on the water tours? Everybody else down there
(05:33):
on the boat, wouldn't everybody else down there on the
water toys except you. He come home and he got
the scent of women on him, And it's all fining
good because I got a maintenance man on the side
that keeps me occupied. Well, y'all, even case case close case,
aw he doing you? You doing him? He do wrong?
(05:55):
You do wrong? Caselo end of letter? What what what
you're inviting us? In this phone. Your correction to the
problem is to get a maintenance man on the side.
And I'm going really fond of this guy, but I've
had to pull back from him a little bit because
he calls himself my boyfriend, and I got always got
(06:16):
to correct him. He's hinted that my husband is probably
a Cheatah. What you need his hint he ain't. He
ain't smelling the scent of other women on your man.
You are. He's hinted that your husband is a cheatah,
And he knows Jeff like you. I know you're mad
(06:36):
as all right. We'll let part two of Steve's response
to today's Strawberry letter coming up at twenty three minutes
after the hour. The subject is my boyfriend is a
show off. We'll get back into it right after this.
You're listening show, all right, Come on, Steve, Let's recap
(06:58):
today's Strawberry letter with the subject of my boyfriend is
a show off. Okay, This married woman has a boyfrid
problem already. Her husband spends money and things on her
instead of time and talking to her. They got a boat,
they got water toys. He always at the lake when
(07:19):
he come home. She can smell a center of the
women on her. But that don't bother her because she
has a maintenance man on the side and he keeps
me occupied. Okay, cool, He down at the lake tripping,
and you didn't decide to get you a maintenance man
to help keep you occupied. We even where what's on
(07:39):
us the letter? Fol I don't know what we even by? Bye.
My boyfriend is a show off. But you got nerve
to this man to call you. He's hinted and then
and then, first of all, you've gotten fond of this guy,
but you got to pull it back a little bit
because he calls himself my boyfriend and always had to correct.
But that's what he is. He your boyfriend. Yeah, that's
(08:00):
what it is. You might not care for the title.
You know you do this several titles going on in here.
He's hinted that my husband is probably a cheatah, in
hopes that it will make us closer. I can see
through the BS. This ain't BS. This is facts. This
is not BS. You can see through the BS. It's
not BS. He telling you the truth. Your husband. He's
(08:24):
hinted your husband to Cheatah, you think your husband cheating?
That's why you're cheating. Where we at with this hill.
I don't like it with me and gossip, but this
guy is special to me, so I'll overlooked it. Why
what I can't deal with this? How he tries to
one up my husband and everything he does for me.
It becomes obvious over the Christmas holidays when my husband
(08:44):
sent me to the spot for the entire day. I
was unavailable to my maintenance man for hours and he
was losing his mind. So a week later, he sent
a massage therapist to my house while my husband was there.
He ain't one up in he doing you, you know,
sent the therapist to the damn house while your husband
is dead. That ain't one up in your husband. That's
(09:07):
putting you in a precarious position. And here you go again,
you know, but but you know what, the old ladies
see this the game you playing though, See you playing
this game with your little maintenance man. So he's he's
doing maintenance work. He doing upkeep. That's what the maintenance
men do. We come and keep up the property. See
(09:27):
we maintain property, you property, So he's maintaining it. You
got their piss at the house. Here go another one
right here? My husband gave me a diamond pinky for Christmas,
so he turned around and got me a bigger diamond
band for Valentine's Day. Okay, what what enjoy the gift?
(09:48):
You like things because your marriage is being held together
by things instead of talking in time. So he didn't
found out you like things, right, so he didn't got
your big diamond a bracelet for Valentine's Day. I can't
tell my husband where the gifts come from. Leave him
down at your job in your desk like everybody else.
(10:09):
Do that? Cheat? What are you wearing this bracelet around
your husband? Fault? You're stupid, You're stupid, Dao, my damn
nerd I don't know. I can't explain to him where
I got this big diamond band from. Where you wearing
it at the house? Fault? Keep it down at your job.
(10:29):
And I can't tell my co workers why my office
is always full of fresh flowers because it's two men
sending them. Yeah, like attention. I've asked my maintenance man
to stop being a show off and stay in his lane,
and that really hurt his feeling. Stay in his lane?
How you gonna tell the man what the lane is? See?
(10:53):
I think he's hoping he can woo me away from
my fabulous lifestyle and marriage, but that will never happen.
How do I tell him he's ruining the fun in
our relationship? Well, let me explain something to you. Your
marriage is things you really don't care. You care about things.
You want to have a boyfriend, but you want to
(11:13):
tell him how to be the boyfriend. You want to
have a side piece. You want to tell him how
to be a side piece, but you really the side piece,
and you don't even understand that. And so now you
can't write the rules to this because let me explain
the rules too. You've heard the turn pimper ain't easy,
but somebody got to do it. Well, let me tell
you the real rule. Pimper ain't easy and everybody can't
(11:34):
do it. See that's the real rule of pimping. Pimper
ain't easy and everybody can't do it. And you ain't
a pimple. I'm just gonna tell your facts. You ain't
a pimper, but you're trying to play like you a pimper.
You're trying to pimp your husband for things, and you
pimper this man for things, and you like the attention.
But pimper ain't easy, but somebody got to do it.
Problem is, you ain't the one that can do it.
(11:55):
Pimper ain't easy, and everybody can't do it, and you, lady,
can't do it. You ain't pimp. You need to get
out the pimp business because you don't even know how
to do it. You're taking the gifts to the house.
Y'a ought to have that down him. You ought to
let him call you your boyfriend. What difference that may?
He ain't talking to nobody but you, You stupid. You
(12:15):
gotta let him call you something. He want to be
your boyfriend, Let him do that. I tell him quick
calling me your boyfriend. Why he ain't talking nobody but you?
Now if he posted on Instagram, we have a problem.
So he got the title of boyfriend. So it's pimping.
That's what it do. So so you want to be
the girlfriend you're telling it to me. Go ahead, yo,
(12:37):
I don't like this letter. I'm sorry. I don't apologize
to everybody listening, because don't nobody listening driving the work,
at work, at the house, or nobody give a damn.
We don't care what happened to you, all your little
ragged ass marriage. I hope you get a divorce. I
hope both of them spot you. I hope the therapists
tell on you all this here. I hope the flowers
get sent to the wrong house. All of it you're
(12:59):
making all right. Listen, we're gonna wrap this one up, Steve.
Thank you. Post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter at
Stevey at com, Todate, Instagram, and Facebook. Check out the
Strawberry Letter podcast on demand, coming up with forty six
minutes after the hour, it's Junior and sports Talk. Right
after this, you're listening to the Stave Harvey Morning Show
Well, it is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and
if you need advice on relationships, on dating, work, sex, parenting,
and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM
dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be
reading your letter live on the air, just like we're
going to read this one. You hear that pop pop
right here, right now, and it could be yours. You
(00:24):
never know, you never know. Buckle up and hold on tight.
We got it for you here it is Strawberry Letter.
Thank you, nephew. My boyfriend is a show off. Dear
Stephen Shirley. I've been married for almost nine years to
a man that would rather buy me things than talk
to me and spend time with me. We have a
(00:44):
boat and other water toys. That's how he spends his time.
I can only imagine how women must flock to him
when he's at the lake, because I can smell their
scents on him. Whenever he does come home, It's all
fine and good because I've got a maintenance man on
the side and he keeps me occupied if I need companies.
I am growing really fond of this guy, but I've
(01:07):
had to pull back from him. A little bit. He
calls himself my boyfriend, and I'll always correct him. He
has hinted that my husband is probably a cheater and
hopes that it will make us closer. I can see
through the bs and I don't like when men gossip,
but this guy is special to me, so I overlooked it.
What I can't deal with is how he tries to
(01:28):
one up my husband and everything he does for me.
It became obvious over the Christmas holidays when my husband
sent me to the spot for an entire day. I
was unable to I was unavailable to my maintenance man
for hours, and he was losing his mind. So a
week later, he sent a massage therapist to my house
(01:49):
while my husband was there. My husband gave me a
diamond pinky ring for Christmas, so he turned around and
got me a bigger diamond band for Valentine's Day. I
can't tell my husband where the gifts come from, and
I can't explain to my coworkers why my office is
always full of fresh flowers. I've asked my maintenance man
(02:10):
to stop being a show off and stay in his lane,
and that really hurts his feelings. I think he's hoping
he can woo me away from my fabulous lifestyle and marriage.
But that will never happen. How can I tell him
he's ruining the fun in our relationship? What are you doing? Seriously,
(02:35):
what are you doing? You have a husband, you have
a boyfriend, and you need help from us with what.
I'm trying to figure that out. It's not like you're
trying to fix your marriage or anything, because you're already
set in your letter. You can smell other women's sense
on him talking about your husband, and it's fine and good.
It must be, because why aren't you out on the
(02:58):
boat with him? You never mentioned that you left that
part out. Why you aren't spending time. I know you
said he doesn't talk to you and all that, but
something must be going on. Why you know, besides that,
why you don't go out there or anything? You just
let him go. I think you love the attention you're
getting from both of these men. I think you love
the gifts, and I think you're playing a dangerous game
(03:19):
here and listen, Please don't be stupid for one second
and think that the grass is greener on the other
side with your side piece. I think he'll continue his
generous gift giving until you know decide if you do
to leave your husband, then all that's probably going to stop.
He's in competition with your husband. He's trying to woo you.
(03:42):
Like you said in the letter, you're the pawn here,
not the prize. This game won't be as exciting if
you leave your husband. Okay, so please don't give up
what you're already calling your fabulous lifestyle and marriage. I
hope you mean that when you say it, that it
will never happen. I do hope you mean that. And
you ask, how do you tell that he's ruining the
(04:03):
fun in your relationship? How do you tell him that? Well,
you won't have to if you leave him alone and
talk to your husband about your marriage. That's what you
need to do at this point. Figure out what's going
on there, Steve, this letter is just a bunch of
bass less I don't care. I don't got other things
(04:28):
to do. Man trying to be a good grandfather now
and all is here trying to talk sense into my
kids and dogs. I ain't got time for this, lady,
and this mess sheet and created. My boyfriend is a
show off. Why do you have a boyfriend? Let's just
start there. We got a whole letter that don't even
(04:50):
have to be a damn letter. If you would just
fix the problem, you can't upset it a thousand times.
You can't fix what's wrong in your house outside your house.
You've been married nine years to a man who would
rather buy you things than talk to you and spend
time with you. We got a boat, other water tours,
and he spends his time. I can't. I can only
(05:12):
imagine how women flock to him when he at the lake,
because I can smell they sent on him whenever he
does come home. Okay, right there, right there is where
we need to address. Shirley said it. Why you ain't
on the boat, Why you ain't at the lake, Why
you ain't on the water tours? Everybody else down there
(05:33):
on the boat, wouldn't everybody else down there on the
water toys except you. He come home and he got
the scent of women on him, And it's all fining
good because I got a maintenance man on the side
that keeps me occupied. Well, y'all, even case case close case,
aw he doing you? You doing him? He do wrong?
(05:55):
You do wrong? Caselo end of letter? What what what
you're inviting us? In this phone. Your correction to the
problem is to get a maintenance man on the side.
And I'm going really fond of this guy, but I've
had to pull back from him a little bit because
he calls himself my boyfriend, and I got always got
(06:16):
to correct him. He's hinted that my husband is probably
a Cheatah. What you need his hint he ain't. He
ain't smelling the scent of other women on your man.
You are. He's hinted that your husband is a cheatah,
And he knows Jeff like you. I know you're mad
(06:36):
as all right. We'll let part two of Steve's response
to today's Strawberry letter coming up at twenty three minutes
after the hour. The subject is my boyfriend is a
show off. We'll get back into it right after this.
You're listening show, all right, Come on, Steve, Let's recap
(06:58):
today's Strawberry letter with the subject of my boyfriend is
a show off. Okay, This married woman has a boyfrid
problem already. Her husband spends money and things on her
instead of time and talking to her. They got a boat,
they got water toys. He always at the lake when
(07:19):
he come home. She can smell a center of the
women on her. But that don't bother her because she
has a maintenance man on the side and he keeps
me occupied. Okay, cool, He down at the lake tripping,
and you didn't decide to get you a maintenance man
to help keep you occupied. We even where what's on
(07:39):
us the letter? Fol I don't know what we even by? Bye.
My boyfriend is a show off. But you got nerve
to this man to call you. He's hinted and then
and then, first of all, you've gotten fond of this guy,
but you got to pull it back a little bit
because he calls himself my boyfriend and always had to correct.
But that's what he is. He your boyfriend. Yeah, that's
(08:00):
what it is. You might not care for the title.
You know you do this several titles going on in here.
He's hinted that my husband is probably a cheatah, in
hopes that it will make us closer. I can see
through the BS. This ain't BS. This is facts. This
is not BS. You can see through the BS. It's
not BS. He telling you the truth. Your husband. He's
(08:24):
hinted your husband to Cheatah, you think your husband cheating?
That's why you're cheating. Where we at with this hill.
I don't like it with me and gossip, but this
guy is special to me, so I'll overlooked it. Why
what I can't deal with this? How he tries to
one up my husband and everything he does for me.
It becomes obvious over the Christmas holidays when my husband
(08:44):
sent me to the spot for the entire day. I
was unavailable to my maintenance man for hours and he
was losing his mind. So a week later, he sent
a massage therapist to my house while my husband was there.
He ain't one up in he doing you, you know,
sent the therapist to the damn house while your husband
is dead. That ain't one up in your husband. That's
(09:07):
putting you in a precarious position. And here you go again,
you know, but but you know what, the old ladies
see this the game you playing though, See you playing
this game with your little maintenance man. So he's he's
doing maintenance work. He doing upkeep. That's what the maintenance
men do. We come and keep up the property. See
(09:27):
we maintain property, you property, So he's maintaining it. You
got their piss at the house. Here go another one
right here? My husband gave me a diamond pinky for Christmas,
so he turned around and got me a bigger diamond
band for Valentine's Day. Okay, what what enjoy the gift?
(09:48):
You like things because your marriage is being held together
by things instead of talking in time. So he didn't
found out you like things, right, so he didn't got
your big diamond a bracelet for Valentine's Day. I can't
tell my husband where the gifts come from. Leave him
down at your job in your desk like everybody else.
(10:09):
Do that? Cheat? What are you wearing this bracelet around
your husband? Fault? You're stupid, You're stupid, Dao, my damn
nerd I don't know. I can't explain to him where
I got this big diamond band from. Where you wearing
it at the house? Fault? Keep it down at your job.
(10:29):
And I can't tell my co workers why my office
is always full of fresh flowers because it's two men
sending them. Yeah, like attention. I've asked my maintenance man
to stop being a show off and stay in his lane,
and that really hurt his feeling. Stay in his lane?
How you gonna tell the man what the lane is? See?
(10:53):
I think he's hoping he can woo me away from
my fabulous lifestyle and marriage, but that will never happen.
How do I tell him he's ruining the fun in
our relationship? Well, let me explain something to you. Your
marriage is things you really don't care. You care about things.
You want to have a boyfriend, but you want to
(11:13):
tell him how to be the boyfriend. You want to
have a side piece. You want to tell him how
to be a side piece, but you really the side piece,
and you don't even understand that. And so now you
can't write the rules to this because let me explain
the rules too. You've heard the turn pimper ain't easy,
but somebody got to do it. Well, let me tell
you the real rule. Pimper ain't easy and everybody can't
(11:34):
do it. See that's the real rule of pimping. Pimper
ain't easy and everybody can't do it. And you ain't
a pimple. I'm just gonna tell your facts. You ain't
a pimper, but you're trying to play like you a pimper.
You're trying to pimp your husband for things, and you
pimper this man for things, and you like the attention.
But pimper ain't easy, but somebody got to do it.
Problem is, you ain't the one that can do it.
(11:55):
Pimper ain't easy, and everybody can't do it, and you, lady,
can't do it. You ain't pimp. You need to get
out the pimp business because you don't even know how
to do it. You're taking the gifts to the house.
Y'a ought to have that down him. You ought to
let him call you your boyfriend. What difference that may?
He ain't talking to nobody but you, You stupid. You
(12:15):
gotta let him call you something. He want to be
your boyfriend, Let him do that. I tell him quick
calling me your boyfriend. Why he ain't talking nobody but you?
Now if he posted on Instagram, we have a problem.
So he got the title of boyfriend. So it's pimping.
That's what it do. So so you want to be
the girlfriend you're telling it to me. Go ahead, yo,
(12:37):
I don't like this letter. I'm sorry. I don't apologize
to everybody listening, because don't nobody listening driving the work,
at work, at the house, or nobody give a damn.
We don't care what happened to you, all your little
ragged ass marriage. I hope you get a divorce. I
hope both of them spot you. I hope the therapists
tell on you all this here. I hope the flowers
get sent to the wrong house. All of it you're
(12:59):
making all right. Listen, we're gonna wrap this one up, Steve.
Thank you. Post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter at
Stevey at com, Todate, Instagram, and Facebook. Check out the
Strawberry Letter podcast on demand, coming up with forty six
minutes after the hour, it's Junior and sports Talk. Right
after this, you're listening to the Stave Harvey Morning Show
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