April 4, 2025 • 29 mins
SATURDAY
After watching MAFS this week, Amy wants to know your "Stone Cold Breakup" story.
TRUMP has been heavily in the news, Chris finds the funny in The Don for the week!
Kids and "Forbidden Fruit" - Items we ban that make them MORE desirable.
Amy's Birthday.
Things that make you go arhh wraps up the show, we love our kids but sometimes it's best to find a safe place to vent!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Chris Page and your Ard in the Morning. Hello and
welcome to the Chris Page and Amy Gerard Podcast. Thank
you for choosing our podcast. We know there are ten
million podcasts out there and you could probably have chosen
one way. One of the hosts isn't blowing their nose
on air.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
I just I'm filled with so much flam and it
just won't end.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
You had pneumonia last week I did soldiers on Thank
you for coming in? Yeah, how long does snot? It
is this stuff?
Speaker 2 (00:32):
If you blow your nose, the more often you blow
your nose, the more your body creates. Is that a fact?
Speaker 1 (00:39):
I don't know what did I just make that up?
So if the snot, if you blow the nose out,
if you blow it out, your body goes, Oh you've
lost your snot. You must need more time.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
I did read somewhere that actually, the more you blow, Jesus,
the more you blow your nose the.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
More so the more the more I blow, the more
my body will keep making.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
I don't know. That should just be a weird fact
that I've made up in my own head. But anyway,
I can't seem to shake this.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Yeah, No, I think I think you're getting confused with Yeah,
some let's get into the podcast, Chris, and Hey, Maths
is just about to finish up.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
I know, I don't know what I'm going to do
with myself, to be honest.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Get a life.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
From you.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Read a book.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
I do read, Thank you very much.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
But there's been all the breakups, and I know the
big one. Everyone's sweers Jackie and Ryan and Jackie's pretty
brutal takedown of Ryan, right.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Yeah, And I don't want to give her too much
airtime because I don't think she's a very nice person.
But it was more just about how savage her delivery
and how how savage her breakup words were.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Let me just hear her voice. I just remember which one.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
She is tolerating. Your behavior is isolating. The way you
speak and control the people and animals you love scares me.
Oh God, you've allowed your friends to scold me. Yelling
and scolding adults is disgusting.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
That's enough, turn it off.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
I mean you need to.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
Yeah, who says scolding sounds like an Enid Blyton book.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
It just got me thinking though about breakups and I
this is not something anyone I ever dumped you, yes once,
because I.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
Mean, you're a fun time and you're yeah, I was blonde.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Yeah. It was a much older guy and I was
trying to flex and be really dominant, and he was like,
I'm not having a bar of ratio.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Wise, I reckon, you have broken some heart, Samy Gerry.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
I have done majority of the dumping, and when I
tell you, some of the ways that I have gone
about it are honestly appalling. I look back now as
a bit more of a mature adult and think, wow,
like you are an asshole. I was dating a guy
once for three years. We were living together. He was
(02:57):
a bit older than me. He was ten years older
than me. I must have been about twenty four. And
we just got back from a holiday and we had
this big row. I don't know if this isn't again
a row around.
Speaker 1 (03:10):
Sorry, I'm living in an enid blytch? Is this a
famous five?
Speaker 2 (03:14):
We'd had a big argument, and I granted it didn't
just come out of nowhere, but he took off and
went to work, and after he left, I got a
removalless truck to come round and I cleared out all
of my clothes and my furniture and I left and
I changed my number. What was shout what what did
he have?
Speaker 3 (03:34):
What?
Speaker 2 (03:35):
No, he actually didn't do anything. It was he didn't
even do anything bad like cheat or disrous food.
Speaker 4 (03:42):
It was.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
It was more I was wanting more from him and
he couldn't give me any more because he was a
business owner. I don't even want I can't even tell
you how poorly Uh.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Did you even note? No, So he got home, all
your stuff is gone, He goes, what the hell rings you? No,
he can't, your number's been disconnected or some other person.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Else, savage. It It comes back to this whole like
making temporary decisions, making permanent decisions based on temporary feelings.
I used to be really bad at it, and so
I've grown up and matured quite a lot.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
I hope.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
So.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Yeah, and he hadn't done anything wrong.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Well, sorry, there was conflicting issues in our relationship and
i'd gone out, we'd gone on this holiday and it
was a beautiful holiday for like a honeymoon, and then
I came home and he basically just disappeared and turned
into a myth again. And I was like, I can't
keep doing this hot cold, hot, cold, and he was like,
I can't change and give you anything more, and I
(04:42):
was like, okay, cool, and.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
So I had the chat with him. You said, yeah,
I just I need more.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
He was like, I can't give you more. And so
then I took that as my cue to leave without
telling him.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Three years living together, Yeah, changed your number.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Oh that's I mean. We could do a whole breakfast
show on the way that I have left relationships is appalling.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
Don't worry.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
I did get calm. I I had my fair share
of absolute asshole mends after that.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
So okay, I want to hear I want to hear
another one on your list in a minute, but please,
I want to hear from you as well. Thirteen one
oh six five. Give us a call with your most
stone cold.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Breakups, savage breakup.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
If you can beat Amy Gerard three years.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
Well, maybe you've been broken up with really badly, like
just ghosted, or someone's just dropped off the face of
the earth.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
You can be giving or receiving here. Either way, your
stone cold breakup stories will make it worth you while
as well. Is it muck hair dryers or mook hair
dry Muck hair driers. There were three hundred bucks. We've
got some of those to give away this morning for
our favorite stories your stone cold breakups, Chris, I'm talking
about breakups, yeah, and real stone cold breakups because we've
(05:55):
seen a couple of brutal ones on Maths. Yeah, during
the week Jackie giving it to Ryan.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
She's a savage.
Speaker 1 (06:02):
Amy, your asset.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
I'm actually worse than Jackie than Jackie.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
Amy was living with a dude for three years and
moved out while he was at work and changed her number.
And he wasn't He wasn't abusive, he was Oh, okay,
give us that. You said there was heaps of them.
Speaker 4 (06:20):
What else?
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Yeah, Probably one of the ones I regret the most,
like I feel like I feel the worst about it
was living overseas in the UK and I was living
with my UK boyfriend at the time, and I'd been
over there for three years, so all of my clothes,
everything i'd accumulated over there was in his house. And
I came back for Christmas two weeks earlier. He joined me.
(06:42):
We spent Christmas together and then he had to go
back because he was a pe teacher. And I said,
I'm going to stay on for two more weeks because
I want to spend some time with my family and
I'll be back, and then I decided I wasn't going
to go back, and so I broke up with him
over an email and then I said, can you can
you pack up all of my belongings in tee chess
(07:04):
and shipped them home to me? Ah?
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Was he your pe teacher? Okay, just checking.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
He was such a lovely guy, like we were very very.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
In Love's podcaster to good Morning.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
He's not a podcaster and he hates my guts.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Jack on thirteen one oh six'. Five jack tell us
about your stone cold break. Up, well were you giving or? Receiving,
Jack Good?
Speaker 5 (07:30):
MORNING i was on the receiving end Of this was
a rough.
Speaker 4 (07:34):
One.
Speaker 5 (07:34):
Yeah SO i was at a birthday. PARTY i found
my partner halfway down a rather large yard dancing with another.
Guy she was very, drunk SO i split that up
and then brought her to the top of the. YARD
i gave her a. Kiss she pushed me away and
SAID i have a, boyfriend And i'm, like, yeah you're
looking at.
Speaker 4 (07:51):
Him so that was.
Speaker 5 (07:53):
Unreal tried to feed her and have her have a
drink so that she could come to a little bit
and found out the next day from a female friend
of mine that she had cheated on her boyfriend with my.
Girlfriend so it was a double.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Cheat oh dirty.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Dog at least it was. All it all went full. Circle,
yeah SO.
Speaker 5 (08:11):
I just never heard from her. Again so that was
just the end of the.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
Conversation so she wasn't lying when she, says, Go i've
got a. Boyfriend oh, no, no the.
Speaker 5 (08:21):
The other, Boyfriend Like i'm her. Boyfriend the other boyfriend
is my.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Friends oh did they end up getting?
Speaker 6 (08:26):
Together, yeah so, NO i don't think so all around
with each other at a party And cassie lost her
boyfriend AND i lost my girlfriend to a double.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Cheat, okay are you still hurting?
Speaker 2 (08:39):
You and you And cassie should hook?
Speaker 5 (08:41):
Up, yeah that almost happened out of. Respect, YEAH i
sort of just left her.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Alone but, yeah right out of. RESPECT i would say.
Speaker 5 (08:51):
That the main hurt comes from the fact that she
was my first, time and really in that first, time.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Yep men full hard for the first, time Don't, yeah
and you never the men really go hard on the first.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
Time and you never forget about your first, time and
they're a very special.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
Person it's always. There and, Yeah i'm so glad that
story went the way it did when it just started
with he was at a party and girlfriend halfway down
a large. YARD i thought we were going to have
our first dump f tell us about your stone cold.
Speaker 7 (09:22):
Breakup, Fiona, Hey Fionda, hey hey, guys it wasn't actually for.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Me it was my.
Speaker 7 (09:27):
Mom so she was actually married eleven years to a.
Guy he went overseas AND i say an inverted commas
for a business. Trip he then sent her A skype
and said that he really wasn't coming home and he
was going To spain with his. Girlfriend what he just
for eleven?
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Years gone eleven years and didn't even have the decency
to do it to her.
Speaker 7 (09:49):
Face, no he was a bit of a keyboard. Warrior
so he chucked it On skype and she got A
skype message and that was the end.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Of That Skype skype's.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
It what country did he because this is how you
Know Spain, spain because you can.
Speaker 7 (10:05):
Tell he was in he was In, london sent her
A skype and then he went To spain with the.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
Girlfriend wait Is skype where they do the video? Call
like was he talking to her or did he literally
say like a?
Speaker 7 (10:17):
Test it didn't even man? Up who just sent her the?
Message not even a video?
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Call, yeah HE'S i mean sounds LIKE i just.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
Ghost at least it Was, spain because you know the
age or, Sorry, emmy you know the age that they're
going to be the girlfriend depending on what country the
guy has run off. To So spain's all, Right, thailand,
yeah if you're if your man, goes, Hey i'm with my.
Girlfriend i've moved overseas and you're where and you Go. Manila,
well probably for the best. Yard it is now time
(10:53):
for our Weekend trump. Date they're eating the, dogs they're
eating the.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
Cats, WELL i took two, tests cognitive. Tests as we
are very very close To World war, three And Donald
trump AND i endorsed this. Segment god Bless Chris, Page,
Gerard god.
Speaker 1 (11:10):
Bless, You, donnie and thank. YOU i know you don't
watch the, news but you must have seen something like the.
TARIFFS i actually have.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
HEARD i do know about the tariffs because it's actually
affected a girlfriend of mine who has a fashion. Label,
yeah because they've got some clothing in the state and
she was actually going over there for like a big
launch over there to really get into The american market
and be able to send clothes over there and. Whatnot
and then she i spoke to her on the phone
the other day and she, said, Oh i've got thirty
(11:39):
four percent tax, now so, wait.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
Can she charge more than if she that what she's
meant to?
Speaker 2 (11:45):
Do, WELL i guess, so but then that kind of
you can't charge more than what they're probably already. Charging,
Right so it's a premium sort of. Brand, yeah it's
a decent, brand but it just means that their profit
now is thirty four percent because the one which is
not a small. Chunk.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
Yeah, well the countries that he's smashed with tariffs at
a lot of The asian countries Like, Vietnam, china where
a lot of things are, made And trump, KNOWS i,
Mean america isn't going to start making nikes AND t.
Shirts they're going to still come from those, places but
he's put a tariff because they Charge american stuff tariffs
to come. In, Anyway vietnam have now reversed, theirs so
(12:23):
they're going to, say, now, okay we're removing our tariffs
From american stuff because he said we're going to charge
you all this because when you buy your four DOLLAR
t shirts From big w they WoT four.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
DOLLARS i THINK i bought one the other day.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
For Three, yeah they weren't made. Here i'll give you
the hot. Tip we know that whoever made it might
not live a very happy life as.
Speaker 7 (12:42):
Well.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
Potentially i'm just saying it's better not to think about.
Anyway the big tariff For australia is our, meat our.
Beast donnie wants to stop our beat For australia.
Speaker 3 (12:54):
Bands and they're wonderful people and wonderful, everything but.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
They ban Wonderful american.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
Beef yet we imported three billion dollars Of australian beef
from them just last year. Alone they won't take any
of our. Beef they don't want it because they don't
want it to affect their. Farmers and you know, WHAT
i don't blame, them but we're doing the same thing
right now starting about midnay to. Night they would SAY i.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
HEARD i didn't think it was to DO i thought
it was because of. Standards they didn't meet our industry. Standards,
well we are at a, meet, yeah SO i don't
think it's about like tip for. Tat it's because they're
not meeting the. Standards, Look.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
I'm not asking you to go into detail on. Tariffs,
NO i was.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
Actually going to say something About Donald, trump but it's probably.
Controversial i'll go on, Then, No, Okay, LOOK i think
he's a flawed man and he's an.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
Idiot BUT i, think do you think he's an? IDIOT
i THINK i think he's.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
St immature with the way that he delivers certain things
and carries on and he's very very, immature very high.
S IF i was a working class citizen who lived
in The United, STATES i would feel quite looked. AFTER
i think what he's doing to look after his country
(14:12):
and the people that work in, IT i think that is.
COMMENDABLE i think that he's doing everything that he said
he was going to.
Speaker 1 (14:18):
Do he's just pissing off everyone else in the.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
World everyone else in the. World so you made a good.
Point If vietnam has a tariff On, America, YEAH i don't.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
Know that it's a level playing. Field, again those trees
they're not. There they are good places. Anyway but you're,
right he's Like america's, daddy, Right he's like an Overgrid
he's an overprotective daddy For. America he's, saying you're not
going out in that, skirt And i'm going to look after.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
You, well something why.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
Won't you Take donnie's? Beef, amy why won't you take his?
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Meat, well get it up to the right, standards don
and then we'll take it. Again but, also do we
even Need america's?
Speaker 1 (14:55):
BEEF i think we've got Enough. Caney, yeah oh you
heard they're going to start giving cows these ca nickals
to stop them, farting to to stop climate, change and
a whole other. Thing we'll get into. It i'll tell
you about it.
Speaker 2 (15:06):
Later.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Chris we were just chatting in the song about one
difference with our, kids because your your two boys around
the same age as. Mine you just have the older, Daughter.
Charlie but they're all the, same like all of our,
stories that the older boy does constantly antagonized.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Stag younger boy and then.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Bites. Yes, God but one of the big, differences and
it's a little. One your kids will not shut up
about wanting to Drink coca. Cola, Yes coca. Cola and
isn't advertising or what they're obsessed.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
With, No i'll tell you what it. Is it's because
and this IS i should take a leaf out of
my own. Book it's BECAUSE i won't let them have it,
Right And i've always said, no to coco and, look
don't don't get me. Wrong we don't have a lot
of cocin our house. Period but If ryan brings, home
my husband brings home some, cans little cans and, stuff
they'll be, like, oh can we have? One i'll say.
(16:00):
No so by default that's all that they.
Speaker 1 (16:03):
Want and your, kids my kids have no interest whatsoever
in drinking coca, Cola and That's i've always been because
we're at the, Shops do you want to? Coke and
they're like, nah because you look at it unless you
have a good image of cocing, here it. Doesn't it's
like this black, liquid so it doesn't doesn't look.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Nice, well it's it's bubbly and it's. Sugary my kids love,
it AND i see them when they have. It they're
like little crack, addices, Right they're like oh and their
eyes water and they're like can we have? Another? Sipen
And i'm, like Oh. God BUT i am a byproduct
of parents who were so strict with. Eating like we
(16:42):
had a household and a pantry which we only contained healthy, food, right, carrots,
apples celery. Sticks like a treat for us was a
milk our.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
Root biscuit and you were to watch The. SIMPSONS i
was allowed to watch The.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
SIMPSONS i was never ever allowed to. SWEAR i would
get sent to my room IF i said the word, crap,
right and so then because they were all, forbidden AND
i was suppressed as a child for eating any of
that or using any of that. Language WHEN i did
grow up and kind of got a bit of independence
and started working at woolwortht oh my, GOD i was
(17:16):
a absolute potty, mouth swearing junk, food, disgusting bottomless pit
like was. NO i, Know i'm still.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
There it became.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
BECAUSE i never had. It SO i think there is
absolutely something to be said about doing things in. Moderation
so we have a pantry now where there's a little
bit of junk, foit, like we've got the packets of,
chips and we've got like A kingston biscuit in the biscuit,
jar and my kids know that it's, there and Sometimes
(17:49):
i'll just go and choose an, apple right because.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Okay they go. Right i'm actually sick of chips because
they're always, there you, KNOW i feel like an apple.
Correct whereas if you go, no you can never eat
chips and you can only eat. APPLES i dead.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
Sat used to befriend people at high school BECAUSE i.
COULD i clocked that they had roll ups in their lunch,
box AND i would go on playdates at their house
knowing that there was epic snacks in their. Cupboard. Right
one of my, Girlfriends, amelia her mum used to cook
like potato gems for dinner AND i was, like, what it's,
outrageous you young food for, dinner got potato, Gems and
(18:22):
so NOW i have potato gems every night with my.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
Meal they're so. Good so they're just, elite and they're,
elite and to.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
Be, honest they're apparently not even. Unhealthy they're just. Potato
yeah on the air fryar.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Exactly what about?
Speaker 2 (18:33):
You do your kids eat? Healthy?
Speaker 1 (18:35):
NAH i Mean oscar's. Good the younger. One oscar will
eat you, know, fruit, vegetables and he'll try. Everything we
got a young chart And i'll, go, hey try this
like chicken's foot yep and just pop it in his.
Mouth if he doesn't like, it you'll spit it up
and he'll. Try he's. Fearless oh that's, Great, Henry oh my,
god chicken nuggets and sausages just on Rotation.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
JESUS i, MEAN i feel like that's most PARENT i.
Speaker 1 (18:58):
Like the forbidden fruit theory, though that if if the
more you say something's, bad the more any kid and
to some extent adults are going to be drawn to. It,
yeah you, know gambling and alcohol and things that are.
Naughty so it's. SEXY i was thinking when my, kids
when my kids get a little bit, older anything dad
does is not going to be. Cool SO i, mean
we're talking about drinking coke, now but when they're a
(19:19):
little bit older and they're in high, school, WHATEVER i
should just have cocaine in the. House hey do you
boys want to line and, like, No, dad stop.
Speaker 4 (19:29):
It i'll do.
Speaker 1 (19:29):
It i'll do coke at home and then they'll, go oh,
dad it's so. Embarrassing at a party and someone will, go,
hey do you want some coke and they're, like oh,
no my dad doesn't make it uncool. Exactly you're. Welcome
there's some parenting advice. EVERYONE i took a leaf out
of your. Book during the, Week rard stopped watching the
stopped watching the damn. News you know it texts me
(19:51):
over what the? Election oh my, god.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
You Think i'm, Ignorant but it's it's actually, bliss living
like under a rock and not really know what's going.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
On i'm going to do it for at least the
next few.
Speaker 2 (20:02):
Weeks do it and just don't check, in don't watch
ANY c AND n, things don't check in with The american,
politics AND i, mean we probably won't have anything to talk.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
About but Got dunton And elbow throwing crap at each. Other,
jesus if that's the best we can. Do oh my, God,
okay there might be turn on the news, tonight by the,
way and look out for seaplane. Nice, okay no. Happening so.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Look it was my birthday a few weeks ago and
my lovely Husband, ryan who never ever normally gets me
a single thing for my. Birthday i'm pretty hard to
buy for AND i always just, say don't worry about,
it just get me a. Card he surprised me this
year and he organized For he must have found this
deal thing where we get picked up in a seaplane
(20:51):
and we get flown up to a certain restaurant and
we have lunch there for a couple of, hours and
then we get a seaplane.
Speaker 4 (20:58):
Back.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
Nice, nice, Right and he'd lined up the grandparents so
they're coming over to look after the kids for six.
Hours AND i was, like, oh, well LIKE i was
quite taken. Back that's really nice and really. Thoughtful and,
then BECAUSE i am a, loser these, bizarre little intrusive
thoughts start creeping in AND i don't want to be this, person,
(21:21):
Right hence so WHY i don't watch the. News But i'm,
like what if something happens to, us or what if
the seaplane engine stops working and we plummet into the,
water or you, know because it's wiping out both? Parents oh,
yeah you're both. Right who looks after our? Kids who
(21:41):
takes our?
Speaker 1 (21:42):
Children i'll tell you what you do see on the
news all the, time BECAUSE i am someone who. Watches
it's those, big big airlines all the. Time they, go oh,
god they were halfway To Hong kong and one of
the engines, Failed but that's. Okay we had three other.
Engines we were still able to. Land how many engines
on your sea?
Speaker 2 (21:57):
FLEET i, MEAN i want to hope more than one
they got?
Speaker 1 (22:00):
One, no you just got the one, engine that isn't.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
It, LIKE i don't know if this has just started
happening SINCE i started having. KIDS i would Never i'm
so positively mindset and, Gird but for some bizarre, reason
now That i've got, KIDS i just instantly go worst case.
Scenario you know, WHAT i bet you we end up
having a wonderful. Time the day is, beautiful the sun is,
Out it's probably gonna be. Amazing but at the back
(22:25):
of my, Head i'm, like who will look after my?
Children do you have a?
Speaker 1 (22:29):
WILL i. Don't you haven't done your? WILL i haven't have. You,
Yeah i've got a, will BUT i don't remember what's in.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
It BUT i absolutely need because we own our like
we bought a, home we've got a, mortgage and we've
we absolutely need to do a.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
Will BUT i should just put in my. Will whoever
takes on all of my. DEBT i enjoy.
Speaker 2 (22:49):
IT i just feel like doing a, will even just
sitting down to do it feels very.
Speaker 1 (22:52):
Morbid so if your seaplane goes down, today, NO i, mean,
yeah who takes your three?
Speaker 2 (22:58):
Kids i'm assuming my.
Speaker 1 (23:01):
Brothers so you've got two, Brothers, yeah one.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
Of them has already got three. Kids he ain't taken
on my.
Speaker 1 (23:06):
Three what about your?
Speaker 2 (23:07):
PARENTS i reckon they could do it for like a.
Year you know, what let's just switch up our vocabulary.
HERE i think it's going to be a wonderful birthday.
Present we're going to have a great. TIME i give
you fifty to.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Fifty do they still have if everyone says they don't
want your three? Kids? Yeah do they still have those
old school? Orphanages like In? Annie is that an? Orphanage
what about the?
Speaker 2 (23:33):
Godparents all of my kids have different. Godparents do they
go to each respective?
Speaker 1 (23:36):
GODPARENT i think it's just a title. THING i don't
think godparent has an Illegal, No, NO i think it's Just.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
I'm godparent to my best friend's three, kids AND i
would definitely take all three of.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
HERS i want to know if there's orphanages out there,
still because they probably don't call them. That i'm thirteen
one oh six. Five do you work at an? Orphanage
and do they still have? Them because we want to
know what kind of Condition amy's kids.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
Playing?
Speaker 1 (23:59):
Today this is. Horror the other one That i'd like
to see come back insane. Asylums they don't have them
anymore because it's not politically. Great but there's a lot
you walk around that. Room, yeah there's a lot of
people out. There you walk around and. Go you belong
in an insane. Asylum, yea we don't have them.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
ANYMORE i might end up there after a few more
years of my. Children oh thank.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
YOU i thought you were going to, say your job,
You Chris. Ard it's time For it's where we get
it off our chests Every. Saturday you can have a
flag off your. Kids it's a safe. SPACE i. Hope
have you got made sure your kids aren't listening or
(24:37):
are you going to run the. Gauntlet i'm definitely running the. Gauntlet,
Okay i've done this segment with my kid in. Here,
YEAH i was so, rude but that was, intense clearly a.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
Savage you're right over. There i'm just on the.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
Chest oh that's. Okay it's The Auto, edition right car
thing of things that make you go toward thirteen one
oh sixty. Five what did the kids do around the
car that just drives you totally? INSANE i just bumped
the sinking down thing on my. Seat my kids do
that in the. Car they found the buttons that make
the seats go back and. Forth they do that While i'm.
Driving oh, yeah. Good and the singing up, debt oh
(25:14):
whatever it. Is and now the new one Is Pink Pony,
club which you know we might play from time to
time On kiss they boath sing, that and it's just
still in my.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
HEAD i. Think one of my biggest pet peeves at
the moment is my, youngest my five year. Old he
does this really annoying thing where if he's ever eating
a lolly or a piece of, chocolate he likes to
put it in his, mouth and then he likes to
spit it into the palm of his, hand and then
he puts in his mouth and so, forth over and over.
Again but then what he does is he fingers the
window and he wipes it down the side of his car,
(25:49):
seat or he touches his seat, belt and he just
destroys my. Car AND i want to be that person that,
says all my kids don't in the, car but every
parent allows their kids to eat it the. Car you're
lying to yourself if they. Don't BUT i Just i've
got to draw the line because he just it's this
weird sensory thing in, out, in out of his mouth
(26:09):
and then all over my.
Speaker 1 (26:10):
Car, yeah so sticky down the cracks in the seat as.
Well they get stick things and and finger those.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
Their animal user. Expression, yeah, sorry.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
Sometimes they fish them as. Well, yes, Wow alex is
here on thirty ONE o six. Fire what has made
you go this week with the?
Speaker 4 (26:26):
Kids, well our gorgeous little baby furry. Girl she loves
coming in the right when we go. Shopping so one
day we've jumped into wolves for a couple of, minutes
left the windows slightly, down came, back found a.
Speaker 1 (26:40):
Surprise what a surprise on the seat from your little furry.
Baby can you can we? Clarify what is the? Child very?
Speaker 4 (26:49):
Astute, well she's she's our gorgeous little baby. Furry she's
our fury baby animal.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
Baby, okay they got a little puppy. Dog what kind of?
Speaker 4 (27:03):
Dog it's a little minute of thick. Foxy oh, Sweet,
yeah we just gone the wall is one day and
we've left there in the car for a couple of.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
Minutes he definitely can't do that with real real. Babies
you get into you get arrested for.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
That but real baby's got, nappies that's, true and you
don't leave them in the car unless the windows. Down
and if you're at the, CASINO i suppose it's you,
know it's. Different, LOOK i don't, Know i'm NOT i
don't know That i'm comfortable with dog. Stories it's a,
children it's about. HUMANS i don't, know, Right, Alex, Baby
we'll give you the. Printer, printer never call here. Again
(27:41):
i'm joking you love you. Joking darren did not want
to come on, air but he was a littlely, shy
but he wanted hung. Up darren wanted to tell us
that it was life imitating. Art he just bought a
new car and he found his son out in the
driveway king it like you know you do that to,
well sorry you, don't but your, enemies but, actually keen
(28:03):
cars we're the, key And darren. Reckoned he said his
new car is A tesla and he said he can't
believe this because that is now the rage In. America
people are Keen tesla's because they Hate Elon musk and
Trum so people are actually going around like carving swastikas Into, tesla's,
okay because he's A. Nazi now apparently everyone's A. Nazi
(28:25):
if you look At, twitter elong.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
He's not A. Nazi he's definitely an.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
ALIEN i feel bad for Real nazis because now because
you feel, BAD i feel really sorry for Real nazis
because they used to be kind of special and. Different
and now everyone's A. Nazi you, know they don't stand.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
Out yeah, good this is a great. Entity darn did.
Speaker 1 (28:46):
Not specify what his child was carving into his. Tesla
might have been.
Speaker 2 (28:50):
A it's probably the rude, word probably rude finger or.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
Something, okay we'll be back. Tomorrow we'll do, better we, Promise,
yes we'll bring out a better.
Speaker 7 (29:00):
Show.
Speaker 2 (29:00):
You i'll be here, tomorrow, definitely bright and.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
Early bright and early eight. Am enjoy the rest of your. Weekend,
everyone get out and enjoy the. Sunshine yeah, You Chris,
page and amen your.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
Ard
Chris Page and your Ard in the Morning. Hello and
welcome to the Chris Page and Amy Gerard Podcast. Thank
you for choosing our podcast. We know there are ten
million podcasts out there and you could probably have chosen
one way. One of the hosts isn't blowing their nose
on air.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
I just I'm filled with so much flam and it
just won't end.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
You had pneumonia last week I did soldiers on Thank
you for coming in? Yeah, how long does snot? It
is this stuff?
Speaker 2 (00:32):
If you blow your nose, the more often you blow
your nose, the more your body creates. Is that a fact?
Speaker 1 (00:39):
I don't know what did I just make that up?
So if the snot, if you blow the nose out,
if you blow it out, your body goes, Oh you've
lost your snot. You must need more time.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
I did read somewhere that actually, the more you blow, Jesus,
the more you blow your nose the.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
More so the more the more I blow, the more
my body will keep making.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
I don't know. That should just be a weird fact
that I've made up in my own head. But anyway,
I can't seem to shake this.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Yeah, No, I think I think you're getting confused with Yeah,
some let's get into the podcast, Chris, and Hey, Maths
is just about to finish up.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
I know, I don't know what I'm going to do
with myself, to be honest.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Get a life.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
From you.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Read a book.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
I do read, Thank you very much.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
But there's been all the breakups, and I know the
big one. Everyone's sweers Jackie and Ryan and Jackie's pretty
brutal takedown of Ryan, right.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Yeah, And I don't want to give her too much
airtime because I don't think she's a very nice person.
But it was more just about how savage her delivery
and how how savage her breakup words were.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Let me just hear her voice. I just remember which one.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
She is tolerating. Your behavior is isolating. The way you
speak and control the people and animals you love scares me.
Oh God, you've allowed your friends to scold me. Yelling
and scolding adults is disgusting.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
That's enough, turn it off.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
I mean you need to.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
Yeah, who says scolding sounds like an Enid Blyton book.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
It just got me thinking though about breakups and I
this is not something anyone I ever dumped you, yes once,
because I.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
Mean, you're a fun time and you're yeah, I was blonde.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Yeah. It was a much older guy and I was
trying to flex and be really dominant, and he was like,
I'm not having a bar of ratio.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Wise, I reckon, you have broken some heart, Samy Gerry.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
I have done majority of the dumping, and when I
tell you, some of the ways that I have gone
about it are honestly appalling. I look back now as
a bit more of a mature adult and think, wow,
like you are an asshole. I was dating a guy
once for three years. We were living together. He was
(02:57):
a bit older than me. He was ten years older
than me. I must have been about twenty four. And
we just got back from a holiday and we had
this big row. I don't know if this isn't again
a row around.
Speaker 1 (03:10):
Sorry, I'm living in an enid blytch? Is this a
famous five?
Speaker 2 (03:14):
We'd had a big argument, and I granted it didn't
just come out of nowhere, but he took off and
went to work, and after he left, I got a
removalless truck to come round and I cleared out all
of my clothes and my furniture and I left and
I changed my number. What was shout what what did
he have?
Speaker 3 (03:34):
What?
Speaker 2 (03:35):
No, he actually didn't do anything. It was he didn't
even do anything bad like cheat or disrous food.
Speaker 4 (03:42):
It was.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
It was more I was wanting more from him and
he couldn't give me any more because he was a
business owner. I don't even want I can't even tell
you how poorly Uh.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Did you even note? No, So he got home, all
your stuff is gone, He goes, what the hell rings you? No,
he can't, your number's been disconnected or some other person.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Else, savage. It It comes back to this whole like
making temporary decisions, making permanent decisions based on temporary feelings.
I used to be really bad at it, and so
I've grown up and matured quite a lot.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
I hope.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
So.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Yeah, and he hadn't done anything wrong.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Well, sorry, there was conflicting issues in our relationship and
i'd gone out, we'd gone on this holiday and it
was a beautiful holiday for like a honeymoon, and then
I came home and he basically just disappeared and turned
into a myth again. And I was like, I can't
keep doing this hot cold, hot, cold, and he was like,
I can't change and give you anything more, and I
(04:42):
was like, okay, cool, and.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
So I had the chat with him. You said, yeah,
I just I need more.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
He was like, I can't give you more. And so
then I took that as my cue to leave without
telling him.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Three years living together, Yeah, changed your number.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Oh that's I mean. We could do a whole breakfast
show on the way that I have left relationships is appalling.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
Don't worry.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
I did get calm. I I had my fair share
of absolute asshole mends after that.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
So okay, I want to hear I want to hear
another one on your list in a minute, but please,
I want to hear from you as well. Thirteen one
oh six five. Give us a call with your most
stone cold.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Breakups, savage breakup.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
If you can beat Amy Gerard three years.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
Well, maybe you've been broken up with really badly, like
just ghosted, or someone's just dropped off the face of
the earth.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
You can be giving or receiving here. Either way, your
stone cold breakup stories will make it worth you while
as well. Is it muck hair dryers or mook hair
dry Muck hair driers. There were three hundred bucks. We've
got some of those to give away this morning for
our favorite stories your stone cold breakups, Chris, I'm talking
about breakups, yeah, and real stone cold breakups because we've
(05:55):
seen a couple of brutal ones on Maths. Yeah, during
the week Jackie giving it to Ryan.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
She's a savage.
Speaker 1 (06:02):
Amy, your asset.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
I'm actually worse than Jackie than Jackie.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
Amy was living with a dude for three years and
moved out while he was at work and changed her number.
And he wasn't He wasn't abusive, he was Oh, okay,
give us that. You said there was heaps of them.
Speaker 4 (06:20):
What else?
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Yeah, Probably one of the ones I regret the most,
like I feel like I feel the worst about it
was living overseas in the UK and I was living
with my UK boyfriend at the time, and I'd been
over there for three years, so all of my clothes,
everything i'd accumulated over there was in his house. And
I came back for Christmas two weeks earlier. He joined me.
(06:42):
We spent Christmas together and then he had to go
back because he was a pe teacher. And I said,
I'm going to stay on for two more weeks because
I want to spend some time with my family and
I'll be back, and then I decided I wasn't going
to go back, and so I broke up with him
over an email and then I said, can you can
you pack up all of my belongings in tee chess
(07:04):
and shipped them home to me? Ah?
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Was he your pe teacher? Okay, just checking.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
He was such a lovely guy, like we were very very.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
In Love's podcaster to good Morning.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
He's not a podcaster and he hates my guts.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Jack on thirteen one oh six'. Five jack tell us
about your stone cold break. Up, well were you giving or? Receiving,
Jack Good?
Speaker 5 (07:30):
MORNING i was on the receiving end Of this was
a rough.
Speaker 4 (07:34):
One.
Speaker 5 (07:34):
Yeah SO i was at a birthday. PARTY i found
my partner halfway down a rather large yard dancing with another.
Guy she was very, drunk SO i split that up
and then brought her to the top of the. YARD
i gave her a. Kiss she pushed me away and
SAID i have a, boyfriend And i'm, like, yeah you're
looking at.
Speaker 4 (07:51):
Him so that was.
Speaker 5 (07:53):
Unreal tried to feed her and have her have a
drink so that she could come to a little bit
and found out the next day from a female friend
of mine that she had cheated on her boyfriend with my.
Girlfriend so it was a double.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Cheat oh dirty.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Dog at least it was. All it all went full. Circle,
yeah SO.
Speaker 5 (08:11):
I just never heard from her. Again so that was
just the end of the.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
Conversation so she wasn't lying when she, says, Go i've
got a. Boyfriend oh, no, no the.
Speaker 5 (08:21):
The other, Boyfriend Like i'm her. Boyfriend the other boyfriend
is my.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Friends oh did they end up getting?
Speaker 6 (08:26):
Together, yeah so, NO i don't think so all around
with each other at a party And cassie lost her
boyfriend AND i lost my girlfriend to a double.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Cheat, okay are you still hurting?
Speaker 2 (08:39):
You and you And cassie should hook?
Speaker 5 (08:41):
Up, yeah that almost happened out of. Respect, YEAH i
sort of just left her.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Alone but, yeah right out of. RESPECT i would say.
Speaker 5 (08:51):
That the main hurt comes from the fact that she
was my first, time and really in that first, time.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Yep men full hard for the first, time Don't, yeah
and you never the men really go hard on the first.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
Time and you never forget about your first, time and
they're a very special.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
Person it's always. There and, Yeah i'm so glad that
story went the way it did when it just started
with he was at a party and girlfriend halfway down
a large. YARD i thought we were going to have
our first dump f tell us about your stone cold.
Speaker 7 (09:22):
Breakup, Fiona, Hey Fionda, hey hey, guys it wasn't actually for.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Me it was my.
Speaker 7 (09:27):
Mom so she was actually married eleven years to a.
Guy he went overseas AND i say an inverted commas
for a business. Trip he then sent her A skype
and said that he really wasn't coming home and he
was going To spain with his. Girlfriend what he just
for eleven?
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Years gone eleven years and didn't even have the decency
to do it to her.
Speaker 7 (09:49):
Face, no he was a bit of a keyboard. Warrior
so he chucked it On skype and she got A
skype message and that was the end.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Of That Skype skype's.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
It what country did he because this is how you
Know Spain, spain because you can.
Speaker 7 (10:05):
Tell he was in he was In, london sent her
A skype and then he went To spain with the.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
Girlfriend wait Is skype where they do the video? Call
like was he talking to her or did he literally
say like a?
Speaker 7 (10:17):
Test it didn't even man? Up who just sent her the?
Message not even a video?
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Call, yeah HE'S i mean sounds LIKE i just.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
Ghost at least it Was, spain because you know the
age or, Sorry, emmy you know the age that they're
going to be the girlfriend depending on what country the
guy has run off. To So spain's all, Right, thailand,
yeah if you're if your man, goes, Hey i'm with my.
Girlfriend i've moved overseas and you're where and you Go. Manila,
well probably for the best. Yard it is now time
(10:53):
for our Weekend trump. Date they're eating the, dogs they're
eating the.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
Cats, WELL i took two, tests cognitive. Tests as we
are very very close To World war, three And Donald
trump AND i endorsed this. Segment god Bless Chris, Page,
Gerard god.
Speaker 1 (11:10):
Bless, You, donnie and thank. YOU i know you don't
watch the, news but you must have seen something like the.
TARIFFS i actually have.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
HEARD i do know about the tariffs because it's actually
affected a girlfriend of mine who has a fashion. Label,
yeah because they've got some clothing in the state and
she was actually going over there for like a big
launch over there to really get into The american market
and be able to send clothes over there and. Whatnot
and then she i spoke to her on the phone
the other day and she, said, Oh i've got thirty
(11:39):
four percent tax, now so, wait.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
Can she charge more than if she that what she's
meant to?
Speaker 2 (11:45):
Do, WELL i guess, so but then that kind of
you can't charge more than what they're probably already. Charging,
Right so it's a premium sort of. Brand, yeah it's
a decent, brand but it just means that their profit
now is thirty four percent because the one which is
not a small. Chunk.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
Yeah, well the countries that he's smashed with tariffs at
a lot of The asian countries Like, Vietnam, china where
a lot of things are, made And trump, KNOWS i,
Mean america isn't going to start making nikes AND t.
Shirts they're going to still come from those, places but
he's put a tariff because they Charge american stuff tariffs
to come. In, Anyway vietnam have now reversed, theirs so
(12:23):
they're going to, say, now, okay we're removing our tariffs
From american stuff because he said we're going to charge
you all this because when you buy your four DOLLAR
t shirts From big w they WoT four.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
DOLLARS i THINK i bought one the other day.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
For Three, yeah they weren't made. Here i'll give you
the hot. Tip we know that whoever made it might
not live a very happy life as.
Speaker 7 (12:42):
Well.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
Potentially i'm just saying it's better not to think about.
Anyway the big tariff For australia is our, meat our.
Beast donnie wants to stop our beat For australia.
Speaker 3 (12:54):
Bands and they're wonderful people and wonderful, everything but.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
They ban Wonderful american.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
Beef yet we imported three billion dollars Of australian beef
from them just last year. Alone they won't take any
of our. Beef they don't want it because they don't
want it to affect their. Farmers and you know, WHAT
i don't blame, them but we're doing the same thing
right now starting about midnay to. Night they would SAY i.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
HEARD i didn't think it was to DO i thought
it was because of. Standards they didn't meet our industry. Standards,
well we are at a, meet, yeah SO i don't
think it's about like tip for. Tat it's because they're
not meeting the. Standards, Look.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
I'm not asking you to go into detail on. Tariffs,
NO i was.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
Actually going to say something About Donald, trump but it's probably.
Controversial i'll go on, Then, No, Okay, LOOK i think
he's a flawed man and he's an.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
Idiot BUT i, think do you think he's an? IDIOT
i THINK i think he's.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
St immature with the way that he delivers certain things
and carries on and he's very very, immature very high.
S IF i was a working class citizen who lived
in The United, STATES i would feel quite looked. AFTER
i think what he's doing to look after his country
(14:12):
and the people that work in, IT i think that is.
COMMENDABLE i think that he's doing everything that he said
he was going to.
Speaker 1 (14:18):
Do he's just pissing off everyone else in the.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
World everyone else in the. World so you made a good.
Point If vietnam has a tariff On, America, YEAH i don't.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
Know that it's a level playing. Field, again those trees
they're not. There they are good places. Anyway but you're,
right he's Like america's, daddy, Right he's like an Overgrid
he's an overprotective daddy For. America he's, saying you're not
going out in that, skirt And i'm going to look after.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
You, well something why.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
Won't you Take donnie's? Beef, amy why won't you take his?
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Meat, well get it up to the right, standards don
and then we'll take it. Again but, also do we
even Need america's?
Speaker 1 (14:55):
BEEF i think we've got Enough. Caney, yeah oh you
heard they're going to start giving cows these ca nickals
to stop them, farting to to stop climate, change and
a whole other. Thing we'll get into. It i'll tell
you about it.
Speaker 2 (15:06):
Later.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Chris we were just chatting in the song about one
difference with our, kids because your your two boys around
the same age as. Mine you just have the older, Daughter.
Charlie but they're all the, same like all of our,
stories that the older boy does constantly antagonized.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Stag younger boy and then.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Bites. Yes, God but one of the big, differences and
it's a little. One your kids will not shut up
about wanting to Drink coca. Cola, Yes coca. Cola and
isn't advertising or what they're obsessed.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
With, No i'll tell you what it. Is it's because
and this IS i should take a leaf out of
my own. Book it's BECAUSE i won't let them have it,
Right And i've always said, no to coco and, look
don't don't get me. Wrong we don't have a lot
of cocin our house. Period but If ryan brings, home
my husband brings home some, cans little cans and, stuff
they'll be, like, oh can we have? One i'll say.
(16:00):
No so by default that's all that they.
Speaker 1 (16:03):
Want and your, kids my kids have no interest whatsoever
in drinking coca, Cola and That's i've always been because
we're at the, Shops do you want to? Coke and
they're like, nah because you look at it unless you
have a good image of cocing, here it. Doesn't it's
like this black, liquid so it doesn't doesn't look.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Nice, well it's it's bubbly and it's. Sugary my kids love,
it AND i see them when they have. It they're
like little crack, addices, Right they're like oh and their
eyes water and they're like can we have? Another? Sipen
And i'm, like Oh. God BUT i am a byproduct
of parents who were so strict with. Eating like we
(16:42):
had a household and a pantry which we only contained healthy, food, right, carrots,
apples celery. Sticks like a treat for us was a
milk our.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
Root biscuit and you were to watch The. SIMPSONS i
was allowed to watch The.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
SIMPSONS i was never ever allowed to. SWEAR i would
get sent to my room IF i said the word, crap,
right and so then because they were all, forbidden AND
i was suppressed as a child for eating any of
that or using any of that. Language WHEN i did
grow up and kind of got a bit of independence
and started working at woolwortht oh my, GOD i was
(17:16):
a absolute potty, mouth swearing junk, food, disgusting bottomless pit
like was. NO i, Know i'm still.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
There it became.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
BECAUSE i never had. It SO i think there is
absolutely something to be said about doing things in. Moderation
so we have a pantry now where there's a little
bit of junk, foit, like we've got the packets of,
chips and we've got like A kingston biscuit in the biscuit,
jar and my kids know that it's, there and Sometimes
(17:49):
i'll just go and choose an, apple right because.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Okay they go. Right i'm actually sick of chips because
they're always, there you, KNOW i feel like an apple.
Correct whereas if you go, no you can never eat
chips and you can only eat. APPLES i dead.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
Sat used to befriend people at high school BECAUSE i.
COULD i clocked that they had roll ups in their lunch,
box AND i would go on playdates at their house
knowing that there was epic snacks in their. Cupboard. Right
one of my, Girlfriends, amelia her mum used to cook
like potato gems for dinner AND i was, like, what it's,
outrageous you young food for, dinner got potato, Gems and
(18:22):
so NOW i have potato gems every night with my.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
Meal they're so. Good so they're just, elite and they're,
elite and to.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
Be, honest they're apparently not even. Unhealthy they're just. Potato
yeah on the air fryar.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Exactly what about?
Speaker 2 (18:33):
You do your kids eat? Healthy?
Speaker 1 (18:35):
NAH i Mean oscar's. Good the younger. One oscar will
eat you, know, fruit, vegetables and he'll try. Everything we
got a young chart And i'll, go, hey try this
like chicken's foot yep and just pop it in his.
Mouth if he doesn't like, it you'll spit it up
and he'll. Try he's. Fearless oh that's, Great, Henry oh my,
god chicken nuggets and sausages just on Rotation.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
JESUS i, MEAN i feel like that's most PARENT i.
Speaker 1 (18:58):
Like the forbidden fruit theory, though that if if the
more you say something's, bad the more any kid and
to some extent adults are going to be drawn to. It,
yeah you, know gambling and alcohol and things that are.
Naughty so it's. SEXY i was thinking when my, kids
when my kids get a little bit, older anything dad
does is not going to be. Cool SO i, mean
we're talking about drinking coke, now but when they're a
(19:19):
little bit older and they're in high, school, WHATEVER i
should just have cocaine in the. House hey do you
boys want to line and, like, No, dad stop.
Speaker 4 (19:29):
It i'll do.
Speaker 1 (19:29):
It i'll do coke at home and then they'll, go oh,
dad it's so. Embarrassing at a party and someone will, go,
hey do you want some coke and they're, like oh,
no my dad doesn't make it uncool. Exactly you're. Welcome
there's some parenting advice. EVERYONE i took a leaf out
of your. Book during the, Week rard stopped watching the
stopped watching the damn. News you know it texts me
(19:51):
over what the? Election oh my, god.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
You Think i'm, Ignorant but it's it's actually, bliss living
like under a rock and not really know what's going.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
On i'm going to do it for at least the
next few.
Speaker 2 (20:02):
Weeks do it and just don't check, in don't watch
ANY c AND n, things don't check in with The american,
politics AND i, mean we probably won't have anything to talk.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
About but Got dunton And elbow throwing crap at each. Other,
jesus if that's the best we can. Do oh my, God,
okay there might be turn on the news, tonight by the,
way and look out for seaplane. Nice, okay no. Happening so.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Look it was my birthday a few weeks ago and
my lovely Husband, ryan who never ever normally gets me
a single thing for my. Birthday i'm pretty hard to
buy for AND i always just, say don't worry about,
it just get me a. Card he surprised me this
year and he organized For he must have found this
deal thing where we get picked up in a seaplane
(20:51):
and we get flown up to a certain restaurant and
we have lunch there for a couple of, hours and
then we get a seaplane.
Speaker 4 (20:58):
Back.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
Nice, nice, Right and he'd lined up the grandparents so
they're coming over to look after the kids for six.
Hours AND i was, like, oh, well LIKE i was
quite taken. Back that's really nice and really. Thoughtful and,
then BECAUSE i am a, loser these, bizarre little intrusive
thoughts start creeping in AND i don't want to be this, person,
(21:21):
Right hence so WHY i don't watch the. News But i'm,
like what if something happens to, us or what if
the seaplane engine stops working and we plummet into the,
water or you, know because it's wiping out both? Parents oh,
yeah you're both. Right who looks after our? Kids who
(21:41):
takes our?
Speaker 1 (21:42):
Children i'll tell you what you do see on the
news all the, time BECAUSE i am someone who. Watches
it's those, big big airlines all the. Time they, go oh,
god they were halfway To Hong kong and one of
the engines, Failed but that's. Okay we had three other.
Engines we were still able to. Land how many engines
on your sea?
Speaker 2 (21:57):
FLEET i, MEAN i want to hope more than one
they got?
Speaker 1 (22:00):
One, no you just got the one, engine that isn't.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
It, LIKE i don't know if this has just started
happening SINCE i started having. KIDS i would Never i'm
so positively mindset and, Gird but for some bizarre, reason
now That i've got, KIDS i just instantly go worst case.
Scenario you know, WHAT i bet you we end up
having a wonderful. Time the day is, beautiful the sun is,
Out it's probably gonna be. Amazing but at the back
(22:25):
of my, Head i'm, like who will look after my?
Children do you have a?
Speaker 1 (22:29):
WILL i. Don't you haven't done your? WILL i haven't have. You,
Yeah i've got a, will BUT i don't remember what's in.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
It BUT i absolutely need because we own our like
we bought a, home we've got a, mortgage and we've
we absolutely need to do a.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
Will BUT i should just put in my. Will whoever
takes on all of my. DEBT i enjoy.
Speaker 2 (22:49):
IT i just feel like doing a, will even just
sitting down to do it feels very.
Speaker 1 (22:52):
Morbid so if your seaplane goes down, today, NO i, mean,
yeah who takes your three?
Speaker 2 (22:58):
Kids i'm assuming my.
Speaker 1 (23:01):
Brothers so you've got two, Brothers, yeah one.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
Of them has already got three. Kids he ain't taken
on my.
Speaker 1 (23:06):
Three what about your?
Speaker 2 (23:07):
PARENTS i reckon they could do it for like a.
Year you know, what let's just switch up our vocabulary.
HERE i think it's going to be a wonderful birthday.
Present we're going to have a great. TIME i give
you fifty to.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Fifty do they still have if everyone says they don't
want your three? Kids? Yeah do they still have those
old school? Orphanages like In? Annie is that an? Orphanage
what about the?
Speaker 2 (23:33):
Godparents all of my kids have different. Godparents do they
go to each respective?
Speaker 1 (23:36):
GODPARENT i think it's just a title. THING i don't
think godparent has an Illegal, No, NO i think it's Just.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
I'm godparent to my best friend's three, kids AND i
would definitely take all three of.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
HERS i want to know if there's orphanages out there,
still because they probably don't call them. That i'm thirteen
one oh six. Five do you work at an? Orphanage
and do they still have? Them because we want to
know what kind of Condition amy's kids.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
Playing?
Speaker 1 (23:59):
Today this is. Horror the other one That i'd like
to see come back insane. Asylums they don't have them
anymore because it's not politically. Great but there's a lot
you walk around that. Room, yeah there's a lot of
people out. There you walk around and. Go you belong
in an insane. Asylum, yea we don't have them.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
ANYMORE i might end up there after a few more
years of my. Children oh thank.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
YOU i thought you were going to, say your job,
You Chris. Ard it's time For it's where we get
it off our chests Every. Saturday you can have a
flag off your. Kids it's a safe. SPACE i. Hope
have you got made sure your kids aren't listening or
(24:37):
are you going to run the. Gauntlet i'm definitely running the. Gauntlet,
Okay i've done this segment with my kid in. Here,
YEAH i was so, rude but that was, intense clearly a.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
Savage you're right over. There i'm just on the.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
Chest oh that's. Okay it's The Auto, edition right car
thing of things that make you go toward thirteen one
oh sixty. Five what did the kids do around the
car that just drives you totally? INSANE i just bumped
the sinking down thing on my. Seat my kids do
that in the. Car they found the buttons that make
the seats go back and. Forth they do that While i'm.
Driving oh, yeah. Good and the singing up, debt oh
(25:14):
whatever it. Is and now the new one Is Pink Pony,
club which you know we might play from time to
time On kiss they boath sing, that and it's just
still in my.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
HEAD i. Think one of my biggest pet peeves at
the moment is my, youngest my five year. Old he
does this really annoying thing where if he's ever eating
a lolly or a piece of, chocolate he likes to
put it in his, mouth and then he likes to
spit it into the palm of his, hand and then
he puts in his mouth and so, forth over and over.
Again but then what he does is he fingers the
window and he wipes it down the side of his car,
(25:49):
seat or he touches his seat, belt and he just
destroys my. Car AND i want to be that person that,
says all my kids don't in the, car but every
parent allows their kids to eat it the. Car you're
lying to yourself if they. Don't BUT i Just i've
got to draw the line because he just it's this
weird sensory thing in, out, in out of his mouth
(26:09):
and then all over my.
Speaker 1 (26:10):
Car, yeah so sticky down the cracks in the seat as.
Well they get stick things and and finger those.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
Their animal user. Expression, yeah, sorry.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
Sometimes they fish them as. Well, yes, Wow alex is
here on thirty ONE o six. Fire what has made
you go this week with the?
Speaker 4 (26:26):
Kids, well our gorgeous little baby furry. Girl she loves
coming in the right when we go. Shopping so one
day we've jumped into wolves for a couple of, minutes
left the windows slightly, down came, back found a.
Speaker 1 (26:40):
Surprise what a surprise on the seat from your little furry.
Baby can you can we? Clarify what is the? Child very?
Speaker 4 (26:49):
Astute, well she's she's our gorgeous little baby. Furry she's
our fury baby animal.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
Baby, okay they got a little puppy. Dog what kind of?
Speaker 4 (27:03):
Dog it's a little minute of thick. Foxy oh, Sweet,
yeah we just gone the wall is one day and
we've left there in the car for a couple of.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
Minutes he definitely can't do that with real real. Babies
you get into you get arrested for.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
That but real baby's got, nappies that's, true and you
don't leave them in the car unless the windows. Down
and if you're at the, CASINO i suppose it's you,
know it's. Different, LOOK i don't, Know i'm NOT i
don't know That i'm comfortable with dog. Stories it's a,
children it's about. HUMANS i don't, know, Right, Alex, Baby
we'll give you the. Printer, printer never call here. Again
(27:41):
i'm joking you love you. Joking darren did not want
to come on, air but he was a littlely, shy
but he wanted hung. Up darren wanted to tell us
that it was life imitating. Art he just bought a
new car and he found his son out in the
driveway king it like you know you do that to,
well sorry you, don't but your, enemies but, actually keen
(28:03):
cars we're the, key And darren. Reckoned he said his
new car is A tesla and he said he can't
believe this because that is now the rage In. America
people are Keen tesla's because they Hate Elon musk and
Trum so people are actually going around like carving swastikas Into, tesla's,
okay because he's A. Nazi now apparently everyone's A. Nazi
(28:25):
if you look At, twitter elong.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
He's not A. Nazi he's definitely an.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
ALIEN i feel bad for Real nazis because now because
you feel, BAD i feel really sorry for Real nazis
because they used to be kind of special and. Different
and now everyone's A. Nazi you, know they don't stand.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
Out yeah, good this is a great. Entity darn did.
Speaker 1 (28:46):
Not specify what his child was carving into his. Tesla
might have been.
Speaker 2 (28:50):
A it's probably the rude, word probably rude finger or.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
Something, okay we'll be back. Tomorrow we'll do, better we, Promise,
yes we'll bring out a better.
Speaker 7 (29:00):
Show.
Speaker 2 (29:00):
You i'll be here, tomorrow, definitely bright and.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
Early bright and early eight. Am enjoy the rest of your. Weekend,
everyone get out and enjoy the. Sunshine yeah, You Chris,
page and amen your.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
Ard
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