James Schloeffel-Wankernomics: You Can't Go To The Supermarket To Spend a Shout Out!

Comedian James Schloeffel called Clairsy & Lisa ahead of his Comedy Festival Show Wankernomics-Just Touching Base at the Astor Theatre. He told them all about the show and they discussed the whole world of workplace catchphrases like "Moving forward", "WIP" and "Ideation Sessions"

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Well as part of the Perth Comedy Festival. Wankonomics Just
Touching bases on at the Asta Theater tomorrow and Friddy.
You can get your tickets through Tiger Tech. The co
host James A shallow Full, is with us this morning.
Hello hello, James, Hello, Oh please our pleasure. I blame
the first time anyone sat down around a table to

(00:20):
have a brainstorm in the early nineties for this and
now moving forward, this is what we've got, am I
on the right track there.

Speaker 2 (00:30):
Yes, I mean, I mean our whole show is just
based on a whole heap of ideation session.

Speaker 3 (00:35):
I think they're called ideation sessions now.

Speaker 4 (00:37):
By storms, right, Okay, great, it's a moving feast.

Speaker 3 (00:44):
Yes it is.

Speaker 4 (00:45):
It is, oh, James, mate, even more so now by
the way, thanks for coming to our work in progress,
our whip. Since I mean, since COVID and so many
people working home, the jargon has increased, it feels like
tenfold by there's even more of things been bandied around.

Speaker 3 (01:01):
Do you think it's increased or do you think that
this people are more aware of it now Because one
of the things that happened to me when I during COVID.

Speaker 2 (01:07):
Working from home is. It was the first time that
I saw my wife working right like, she was working
from home as well, and all of a sudden you think,
oh my gosh, she's a circle back and tack that
offline person as well. I've never heard her talk like that,
and I think for a lot of people it was
the first time they'd heard their partners or their housemates

(01:29):
talk like that.

Speaker 3 (01:29):
Because when we're in a wanting right, Yeah, it is confronted.

Speaker 2 (01:36):
Yes, because in the real world we don't talk like that,
But as soon as we kind of log on, we
all of a sudden become absolute widoss.

Speaker 1 (01:46):
Yes, So now do you think people will be able
to leave this show and then go confidently into an
interview the next day using all the corporate lingo.

Speaker 2 (01:55):
Yes. Look, we do treat this as a bit of
a training session because one of the things we realize
is that there's really no point trying to avoid this
traffic pup of language. All you can do is to
accept it, or as we'd say, lean into it, and
just get really really good at it. So we do
take people through some of the tips and tricks that

(02:16):
they can learn to be an absolute wanker themselves.

Speaker 4 (02:23):
I saw what your show was about and then I
just all I could think of it was LinkedIn because
there was so much and there's a lot of people getting,
you know, their word out the word about their business
and that. But it can be very very wanky.

Speaker 2 (02:34):
Oh yeah. I mean, look, there's a couple of rules
with LinkedIn, and the first rule is to be inexplicably
excited about everything you notice that, Like, even if you're
just talking about I don't know, like a brand relaunch
for Omo or something like, you have to you have
to be absolutely ecstatic about it. You have to be thrilled, delighted,
honored to be to be a part of that.

Speaker 3 (02:56):
The second rule when you when you're on.

Speaker 2 (02:58):
LinkedIn is you need to make every just minor accomplishment
sound like a Nobel Prize winning achievement.

Speaker 3 (03:03):
Have you noticed that?

Speaker 4 (03:05):
Yes, absolutely might.

Speaker 2 (03:06):
Just have you know, some some really simple job, but
you need to make it sound as if you are
absolutely changing the world.

Speaker 1 (03:14):
I think in sort of in line with that one,
that's a really big one this year, and I think
it comes with the cost of living and no one's
got any money. Is the shout out. Let's give a
shout out to such and such because we can't give
them a bonus, we can't give them money, so let's
shout them out.

Speaker 3 (03:31):
Yes.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
The only problem is you can't really go down to
the supermarket and use your shout.

Speaker 3 (03:35):
Out to.

Speaker 1 (03:38):
Shouting indeed, which a sort of wanky phrase kind of
gets the biggest audience grown reaction.

Speaker 2 (03:48):
Oh do you know. I think one of the ones
that people like a lot is there are a lot
of moving parts. You notice how people use that phrase.
Basically what that means is the translation of that is
they don't know what I'm talking about. So instead of
saying I'm totally out of my depth and I don't
know what I'm doing here, you just say there are
a lot of moving parts, and then everyone just kind

(04:09):
of nods and goes, Oh, this this person's they're onto it.

Speaker 4 (04:12):
Sometimes as a meeting, we'll have a meeting in the
person the head of HR or something will start talking.
Then they go it's either moving forward or going forward.
That's become a bit of a popular one too.

Speaker 3 (04:21):
Oh well, it's actually compulsory. They moving forward at the
end of every sentence. Moving forward.

Speaker 2 (04:28):
Yeah, it doesn't mean anything, Yeah, yeah, No. What it
does actually is it allows you to increase the lengthy
of the sentences, and in doing that you kind of
sound a little bit more intelligent. You kind of delay
doing any work because you're just kind of extending your sentences.
And because really like if we didn't talk like this,
everyone want to be out of the office by about
nine point thirty every morning, work done, procrastination and society

(04:53):
would collapse.

Speaker 3 (04:53):
So it's really actually quite important that we speak like this.

Speaker 1 (04:57):
Well, shout out to this show because I think it's
just the funniest thing that you're going to see all year,
and anyone who's ever had a job is going to
be able to relate. So, James, thanks for joining us
this morning. Tickets through ticket tech. I'm getting quick. It's
only tomorrow and Friday at the ASTA.

Speaker 2 (05:14):
And James think Friday is sold out actually, so you.

Speaker 3 (05:17):
Have to getting it for tomorrow and night.

Speaker 5 (05:19):
And did we mention it's you and Charles Firth by
the way, yes, my congratulations in the same congratulate James
on five and a half minutes on ninety six a pm.

Speaker 4 (05:29):
So congratulations James much. Well, then it's funny and when
you stop and start talking about how many things slogans
jargons of this whole new language because not you.

Speaker 1 (05:42):
It gives us something to bond together. I think over
our dislike of the moving forward.

Speaker 4 (05:47):
That's fun.