Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
It's the Happy Families podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
It's the pot.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
This is episode one thousand of the Happy Family Podcast,
so we're taking over.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
Hi, this is Craig Bruce, the executive producer of the
Happy Families podcast.
Speaker 4 (00:27):
Hang on, where's Justin and Kyley? Good question.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
Well, this is episode one thousand of the Happy Families podcast,
so we've given them some wee time with the kids
as a little bonus whilst we reflect on the last
one thousand episodes in Australia's leading parents and podcast.
Speaker 4 (00:43):
All right, where should we start?
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Well, the podcast was chugging along for one hundred and
thirty three episodes with Justin before he decided to bring
in a co host to help share the load, and
he didn't need to look far to find the right person.
Speaker 5 (00:57):
I'm not going to do this podcast on my own anymore,
and I'm so honored and so excited to be able
to introduce somebody who I simply adore as my co
host for the Happy Families podcast. Her name is missus
Happy Families. It's Kylie Coulson, my wife. She's agreed, Kylie,
welcome to the Happy Famili's podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
Thank you very much.
Speaker 6 (01:17):
Now, what's the trickiest thing that you think that you've faced.
Speaker 5 (01:20):
As a mum, learning to let go, let go of who.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Or let go of what, Learning to recognize that our
children need to have the space to make their decisions
for themselves, whether they would be decisions we would make
for them or not, and giving them the space to
do it and love them in spite of the decisions
they make or because of the decisions they make.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
And very quickly Kylie became recognized as having one of
the biggest hearts in podcasting.
Speaker 7 (01:52):
The conversations that I have with mums time and time again,
isn't the fact that we resent doing any of those
things right, it's the fact that those things don't light
us up.
Speaker 6 (02:06):
Yeah, okay, those things.
Speaker 7 (02:08):
Are a necessity for our lives to function.
Speaker 6 (02:12):
How do you find yourself again?
Speaker 5 (02:14):
How do you find yourself if you're feeling lost, regardless
of whether it's through employment or through being a stay
at home parent, How do you find yourself?
Speaker 7 (02:24):
For me, it's accepting that I just might fail. I
might not find it at first go around. I might
not find the thing that lights me up, because the
reality is the things that lit me up as a
twenty year old, yeah, they don't light me up anymore,
they're no longer challenging to me, or they're no longer
of interest to me. What are the things that mean
(02:50):
the most to me? What are my priorities, and what
are the things that I stand for? And as I
started to think about those things and really kind of
live into those values, I realized that again privileged decision
that I'm able to make.
Speaker 2 (03:08):
This was a want and not a need. And right
now my family.
Speaker 7 (03:13):
Needs me, and I need you and you need me.
And that was still hard even coming to that realization
for myself, that was hard to sit with for a
few days. What I found is that the longer I
sat there this suffocating feeling that I had been experiencing
(03:34):
as I was trying to work out how I could
do it all, you know, how I could be the
mum that I want to be and the wife that
I want to be, and be where I need to be,
but do something I want to do. I couldn't physically
do it all, and so I had to make a
decision about what was most important to me, and at
(03:55):
the end of the day, my want it's at the
bottom of the list, because I will pick my family every.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
Day, happy, families became this wonderful combination of Kylie's big
heart and Justin's big brain.
Speaker 5 (04:09):
Our job there is not just to connect with them
and help them to feel safe emotionally, but it's also
to let them know that we.
Speaker 6 (04:17):
Believe in their capacity. And so as we say this
is really.
Speaker 5 (04:22):
Hard, are you're really worried, or I get what's going
on for you, I can see it.
Speaker 6 (04:26):
Come here and be close to me and let me
give you a hug.
Speaker 5 (04:28):
We promote competence and capability beliefs, and you think about.
Speaker 6 (04:32):
It that in a voice.
Speaker 5 (04:33):
Imagine if you've got an inn a voice that believes
in you by saying things like you've got this, or
I believe in you, or there is a way forward
and you know how to get there. It's about having
that conversation with them where you're expressing a belief in
their ability to get things right.
Speaker 7 (04:53):
I'm curious, if we're not responsible for our kids happiness,
what are we responsible for?
Speaker 5 (04:58):
Doctor course, The first thing I'm going to say is
that we're responsible for teaching our children to find their
own happiness. And they're most likely to find it not
by searching for it if we do things because we
think they're going to make us happy. We will often
not always, but we will often be disappointed.
Speaker 3 (05:14):
Now, if you're starting to think we're all serious all
the time, think again.
Speaker 7 (05:18):
You don't wear lycra on lycra. I ended up with
a front weggie and a backwedgie and it was not pretty.
And the whole time I was running, all I could
think about was, I don't know what's worse, watching someone
run with a weggie that's not supposed to be there
or watching someone pick out the weggie that shouldn't be there.
Speaker 5 (05:37):
It was horrible. So, oh gosh, that's I thought that
you were sore because of the running, but you saw
from the wedgies.
Speaker 4 (05:48):
I think we're just given them way too much information.
Speaker 6 (05:55):
And I slided off the roof. I tried to grab
the gun out, but slid.
Speaker 7 (05:59):
You make it sound like it was it was planned.
Speaker 6 (06:01):
What happened.
Speaker 7 (06:02):
You actually fell off the.
Speaker 6 (06:04):
Roof, but I slid off the roof.
Speaker 7 (06:08):
So when you finally came to me, because you're on
the far side of the house, so I didn't even
hear you on the roof, let alone here you fall
off the.
Speaker 5 (06:15):
Roof, Well, I didn't make a lot of noise when
I fell, I kind of went, oh no, and then
I slid off the roof.
Speaker 6 (06:23):
You keep saying I fell, I slid off the.
Speaker 7 (06:25):
Roof, Grease, Grease, I got you the Multiplian. We took
my sister to the was it the twenty year anniversary? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (06:37):
Yeah, she was twelve.
Speaker 7 (06:38):
We just gotten married and she was staying with us,
and we took her to Greece and my mom was mortified.
Speaker 6 (06:43):
It's not as innocent as it seems.
Speaker 1 (06:45):
No.
Speaker 7 (06:45):
I was sitting in there, and as a now married woman,
knowing every innuendo and where it was leading, and I
was thinking.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
My goodness, me, my sister's only twelve.
Speaker 5 (06:56):
Yeah, what are my daughters posed to her friend?
Speaker 4 (06:58):
You can use my virgin Yeah, it's nice to know
it's good for something. As a kid, all I remembered
was the music.
Speaker 7 (07:04):
I didn't know any of that stuff.
Speaker 3 (07:06):
Through one thousand episodes of the podcast, we've shared all
the highs and lows of family life, from saying goodbye
to another bird from the nest.
Speaker 5 (07:16):
You raise these kids for twenty years or eighteen years
or whatever ends up being, and then one day they
push off out of the world, and it's really sad.
In so many ways to see them go. Even as
we talk about it now, I'm affected by it, but
it's also thrilling. It's so exciting to see these kids.
We send our heart into the world and off they go, and.
Speaker 6 (07:39):
She's doing it. She's living her life now.
Speaker 5 (07:41):
It's like that little bird that got pushed out of
the nest and it started to fly.
Speaker 4 (07:45):
To saying goodbye to the goodest boy.
Speaker 6 (07:49):
And the vet was so good.
Speaker 5 (07:50):
They lit a candle out in the front office just
which basically said, if there's a candle burning, someone's saying
goodbye to a pet.
Speaker 6 (07:58):
They sat with us, We put Benson on his blanket, They.
Speaker 5 (08:01):
Gave him a catheter and then put a muscle relaxant
into the catheter, and he just laid there for a
couple of minutes, really peaceful, really really relaxed, and I
felt like we were I mean, we were so sad
and we were doing okay though until that moment when Emily,
our seven year old, she had decided at the last
(08:21):
minute that she didn't want.
Speaker 4 (08:22):
To be in the room, and.
Speaker 5 (08:24):
Then she changed her mind once she was out in
the foyer on her own and she came back into
the room and saw Benson laying there and just in
this big, tearful outburst, she said goodbye, Benson, and.
Speaker 6 (08:36):
I gave you this great big hug, and oh boy,
it was tough. It was just so tough.
Speaker 3 (08:44):
Yes, there was some sad endings and some beautiful beginnings.
Speaker 5 (08:49):
Yeah, so then this happens.
Speaker 7 (08:52):
You read there, So our eldest daughter has made it.
Speaker 8 (08:59):
Official, dad, and I'm going to be having a baby
here in September.
Speaker 7 (09:11):
Chaos ensued following her announcement.
Speaker 6 (09:16):
Why what are you crying?
Speaker 5 (09:24):
So everyone's crying except one of the kids, our nineteen
year old, the Museoh, the one who is so in
touch with her feelings?
Speaker 6 (09:31):
Why are you she's crying?
Speaker 4 (09:33):
Why not crying?
Speaker 8 (09:36):
Why are you all crying?
Speaker 9 (09:38):
You're all crying?
Speaker 10 (09:39):
What the heck?
Speaker 7 (09:40):
And in case you're still wondering what the heck is
going on right now, our son in law made it
extremely clear, a baby.
Speaker 6 (09:52):
What are you most excited about?
Speaker 9 (09:53):
I think I'm just most excited that she wants to
include me in the process.
Speaker 6 (09:57):
Oh yeah, and that I.
Speaker 7 (09:58):
Actually get to be with her side by side. In
so many ways, it feels like reliving some of my
own experiences, and yet it's an out of body experience
because it's not mine, it's hers and it's different, and
being able to share with her some of the really
hard learned lessons that I learned way too late and
(10:23):
desperately want her to learn now and take care of
herself and.
Speaker 9 (10:31):
Nurture and support herself and be able to ask for
what she needs because it was something that I really
struggled with as a young man.
Speaker 4 (10:43):
And the circle of life continues.
Speaker 6 (10:45):
What's something that Mum always says to you.
Speaker 11 (10:48):
We'll have a choice, Annie, what are you going to choose?
Speaker 2 (10:50):
Ah?
Speaker 11 (10:51):
Well, we have a family motto, which is choose the
right dealer and trust in God with all our might,
which is one of the things that she says nearly
every single day. Another one is I love you. But
my personal favorite is when I have problems with my
body and how I look and I tell Mama, I
just don't really feel pretty today, She'll go, oh, Ella.
Speaker 7 (11:11):
Stop it.
Speaker 11 (11:12):
You've got the best bomb ever. Don't say that stuff.
Your bomb is awesome.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
I love you. Clean up your room, Lily, it's a
pig sty.
Speaker 10 (11:20):
You're amazing.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
No matter what anyone says, trust.
Speaker 2 (11:23):
In the timing, it'll all work out the way it's
supposed to.
Speaker 10 (11:26):
It's not necessarily she says something. But whether she was
at a concert or I was giving a talk or
anything like that, I would spot her in the crowd
and she would put her hand up to her elobe
and she would just hold it and give it a
little squeeze and a little wiggle. I would see that,
and I would know that she loved me.
Speaker 6 (11:48):
All right.
Speaker 4 (11:48):
That just about covers everything. Justin, isa In, you'd like
us to finish on.
Speaker 5 (11:52):
Hey, do you think that I'm a fun guy. I'm
not talking about a specific kind of mushroom here, I mean,
do you think that I'm.
Speaker 6 (11:57):
A fun kind of person. I got a joke because
it's a fun guy.
Speaker 4 (12:00):
Oh please, justin? This thing was going so well.
Speaker 5 (12:04):
Because you know I'm doing some ptea at the moment.
I said to my pet the other day, can you
teach me to do the splits? And she said, how
flexible are you? And I said, I can't make tuesdays?
Speaker 4 (12:14):
Can someone just turn his mic office? That possible?
Speaker 5 (12:16):
Did you read in the paper the police rested a
couple of kids yesterday when I was drinking battery acid.
Speaker 6 (12:19):
The other one was eating fireworks.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
Justin, Really, do you have.
Speaker 6 (12:22):
To he charged one about the other one off.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
Justin, Look, I know you think you're the funniest dad
in podcasting, but there is one other that I can
think of.
Speaker 12 (12:34):
Justin Hamish Bake here, mates, look from one dad to another.
I just wanted to take in graduations and well done
on what you're doing. But from one podcast to another,
A thousand episodes, prett you mad? That is way too
much work.
Speaker 4 (12:49):
I think me and Andy have been doing our.
Speaker 12 (12:50):
Podcast for like six years and like episode two hundred
and forty anyway, unbelievable.
Speaker 5 (12:57):
Respect.
Speaker 12 (12:57):
Good on you for everything you do, mate.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
So there you are, one thousand episodes the Happy Families
podcast and on behalf of the entire production team. Thanks
for spending time with us. We really hope your family
is happier for having Justin and Kylie share it with you.
See you tomorrow.