January 31, 2023 • 15 mins
Embrace Your Body
Topics included in this episode -
- Justin speaks with Australian of the year, Taryn Brumfitt
- The issue of body image
- Body image influences social groups, identity, and social media
- Is there a difference in body image issues between boys and girls?
- Beauty is heavily influenced by society
- Beauty has nothing to do with how someone looks
- How do we stop kids from losing their perception of true beauty?
- Be the role model for fun
Purchase The Miss-connection Summit
Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families
Email us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
It's the Happy Families Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
It's the podcast for.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
The time poor parent who just wants answers Now. Hello,
this is doctor Justin Colson.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Thank you so much for choosing to listen to the
Happy Families Podcast today. Tarren Brumfort, you may be familiar
with the name after last week's announcement of the Australian
of the Year.
Speaker 3 (00:23):
It's about the way that we feel about all of ourselves,
our skin color, our height, our age, our gender. When
you take your final breath on this earth, what thoughts
will be going through your mind? And no one has
ever said to me the size of their bum.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Tarren Brumfort, an Adelaide documentary maker and activist, has been
not just nominated, but actually proclaimed.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
To the Australian of the Year because of her work.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Around the way we view our bodies. What you may
not know is that Taran joined me just over a
year ago to talk about this very topic in the
Misconnection Summit. You can find the sum online and you
can purchase it and listen to all of the amazing content,
the incredible talks to help you if you're raising a
teenage girl today with the weld, the everyday challenges that
(01:09):
we're facing. But in the Misconnection Summit, I was talking
with Tara and about all the stuff that she's now
the Australian of the Year four and we started off
our conversation by talking about how difficult body image challenges
are right now for young people and how they're different
for boys and girls.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
This is what she had to say.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Gosh, well, it's not great when you look at the
situation that is, but it's also actually no surprise either
because we live in a world that really doesn't support
anyone to have a positive relationship with their body. But
I don't want to paint a disastrous picture here because
I want us to feel a little light and with
some hope when we leave this call. It's not like
(01:52):
we've got this big problem and we don't have any
solutions to it, like we actually do. I think for
us to change and for us to navigate this landscape,
we need to understand what is going on out there and.
Speaker 4 (02:07):
What's at play.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
We have these industries that are preying on our insecurities.
Is their trillion dollar industries beauty, cosmetic, diet, and what
they're doing is they're setting us up to have problems
and for our girls as well. And you know, these
problems that I refer to, they aren't actually problems in
(02:30):
the first place. But these industries are offering products to
problems that don't exist.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
And it's all about the dollar. And I think if we.
Speaker 3 (02:40):
Can understand what's at play, who's delivering the messages, the
why behind the messages, it makes it a whole lot
less powerful when.
Speaker 4 (02:50):
They're coming at us, if we can see it for
what it is.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
So I think if we lived in a world that
celebrated bodies and different shapes and sizes and abilities, we
wouldn't have these issues. So I think the first thing
that we really need to do is go, yes, it's
a big problem.
Speaker 4 (03:08):
You only need to walk down.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
A shopping mall, which I do on occasion with my
own kids, and I remember when they were younger, I
almost just wanted to cover their eyes and like, don't
look at this, but we needed to go shopping.
Speaker 4 (03:21):
But it's just we do get bombarded by these images.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
I think the key is to understand where they're coming
from and the why that sits behind them.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
And it's the dollar. It's money they're making money from
making us feel crap.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
I guess what I really want people to walk away
after watching this knowing is that we weren't born into
the world hating our bodies. We have learned this as
a behavior. It wasn't meant to be our life purpose.
To hate on our body.
Speaker 4 (03:53):
And be at war with our body is just not
the way it's meant to be.
Speaker 3 (03:57):
So if we can just take a moment, take it
step back, think about is the relationship that I have
I'm having with my body is it serving me? Do
I feel good when I go out into the world.
And if the answer is no, then what are you
going to do differently? And I think taking taking stock
of what's going on will help. Now you gave me
(04:18):
a double barrel question, which I think is quite cruel.
For the first question, and just before we started, everyone
Justin's like, are you shuffling papers? I'm like, oh gosh,
yes I am, because I always have to take notes
because I've got so much I want to I want
to say, so occasionally you're going to hear a little
paper shuffle everyone, but just just go with me. The
second point of that question was about boys and girls.
(04:40):
There are different pressures. Boys have this pressure to be
to be manly, to be tall, to be strong and
girls to be pretty. I remember at the Adelaide Airport once.
I remember walking through and there was a surfwear label
and there was two advertisements, both promoting the same piece
(05:02):
of clothing.
Speaker 4 (05:03):
And for the guys they were doing on the.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Surfboard, and for the girls they were like looking at
the surfboard but looking pretty. And I just I stopped
in my tracks and I looked at this, and I
was like, and there is the problem. We teach our
boys often to do and be adventurous, and we often
tell our girls to look a certain way. So it's
no surprise that we've sort of ended up where we've
(05:27):
ended up.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
That's really interesting. I hadn't thought of it like that before,
and I've done a lot of thinking around this area.
But it's actually as a different message, isn't it. Guys
are always active, Guys are using their bodies. Girls don't
use their bodies except in an ornamental way. They have
to look particularly. I'm not trying to do this for
product place, but everyone knows that I've written the book,
(05:49):
so I'm not trying to sort of give myself a
plug here, but I'd love to share something.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
As I was listening to what you said.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
I really when I wrote this book, I talked to
more than four hundred Australian girls about what it is
to be a teenager. And given there it's been a
long time since I was a teenager and I've never
been a girl, this was really eye opening for me,
even though I'm raising six daughters of my own. And
when the body image questions came up, I developed three rules.
(06:20):
They're not one hundred percent iron clad, but they're pretty
close and I'd love to hear what you think about them.
Based on what you've just said in my data and
what I heard in my conversations where body image was
raised as an issue, these three themes consistently showed up.
Number One, a girl's body predicts which social groups she
can belong to. If you want to be popular, you
(06:41):
have to be hot. Number two, the combination of a
girl's body and her social group impacts her identity. In
other words, I'll feel good about myself and who I'm
becoming if my body is hot and I'm in the
cool group. And number three, social media and media the
superpermore generally, which would include surf shops that have got
these big billboards and what have you. They set the
(07:03):
standard for what's hot, and therefore who's popular, and therefore
what a girl should feel about herself. Does that resonate
for you?
Speaker 4 (07:12):
Absolutely it does. I mean, here's the thing about if.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
We unpack it, this was going to come later, I
think in the conversation, but I think it's good to
go there now, this whole beauty ideal. And again I'm
doing the same, I'm not plugging. A lot of people
would have seen Embrace the documentary, and it's free on
Netflix right now. We go through beauty through the ages,
what it was like to be a woman in her
(07:39):
twenties in nineteen twenties, sorry not in her twenties, when
the pressure was to be thinned straight up and down,
small breasts, and then in the nineteen fifties it was
about having a voluptuous body and larger breasts and a
cinched waist. And then in the eighties it was the
supermodel where it was very athletic bodies, and there was
(08:00):
the nineties the waife.
Speaker 4 (08:02):
Look, if you stop.
Speaker 3 (08:05):
To think about how preposterous it is that somebody, you know,
these industries are like, well, this is what we're going
to determine this decade to be beautiful, and to everybody
who doesn't fall into this construct, you're not going to
be very happy with your body because you know this
is where it's at. And I just I liken that too,
(08:25):
sort of when people get on TV and they're like, well,
this season you should wear, It's like, I'm just gonna
wear what I want this season. Like I'm not a sheep.
I'm not going to follow someone else's trend. And I
think if we can encourage our girls and really challenge
ourselves as human beings as to why we perhaps like
(08:46):
something then and then challenge our girls to really pave
their own way and make up their own rules, it's
like see it and I'm sorry I digress here, but
I've been very much in creative mode. I think visually
is everybody but Sea would have been told to have
taken the wig off by a thousand different people it will.
Speaker 4 (09:07):
Ruin your career, and she didn't. She did it her way.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
And I think there is such power in defining what
beauty means to you. And when I was in New
York filming a few years ago, I met some of
the Victoria's Secrets models, and I have.
Speaker 4 (09:26):
To say when I chatted with them, and only a couple.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
I'm not sort of saying this broadly, but these were
women that people would look at on Instagram and be like,
oh my.
Speaker 4 (09:38):
Gosh, you are so beautiful.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
And I tell you what, I didn't have one beautiful
word come out of their mouth, or there was no
interaction with them that was nice in any way, shape
or form. It was just it was very cold and
just not beautiful, if you know what I'm saying. So
I think we really need to turn upside down this
notion of what beauty actually means. And it has nothing
(10:03):
to do with how someone looks. It's got to do
with the energy exchange and how someone makes you feel.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
I really love. We need to actually rediscover that concept
of what beauty is. I might even get weepy when
I think about this, but my wife's smiling at me.
That's beauty. Looking at her eyes, I just go, oh,
this is magic to me, this is gorgeous. I've got
footage of my kids up until about the age of
(10:29):
eight or nine, So as I mentioned six daughters, I've
got footage of them and photos of them running around
the pool. They're playing their goofing off up until the
age of nine or ten. They don't even think about
how they look. They've got the sticky addy tummies. They're
wearing what it is comfortable, or they're not wearing anything
at all, because like when they're kids, who cares, right,
their hair's crazy, they're living life. Young kids, they don't
(10:52):
even think about what beauty is, and there's someone affected
by how they look and they just stoked about what
their bodies can do.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
What have you seen about.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
When kids start to lose this and start to think
about beauty and how do we stop them from losing it?
Speaker 3 (11:08):
Yeah, I've done a lot of thinking on this, and
I think and this is anecdotally, this is from my
experience in my circles and knowing exactly what.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
You're talking about, and there's a great sense of loss.
Speaker 3 (11:19):
Especially when you've seen your own kids, where you're like,
something's changing.
Speaker 4 (11:24):
Now.
Speaker 3 (11:24):
My kids are now fifteen, thirteen, eleven, and nine, so
I'm kind of right in the spot of seeing changes
in changes, praying for changes not to happen from the
younger ones.
Speaker 4 (11:35):
But it does.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
I wonder whether it's because as their parents, we are
their kings and queens and they are taking everything that
we say and do in there, they're like sponges and
they're absorbing.
Speaker 4 (11:51):
I wonder whether they.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Adopt some of our philosophies as adults, because having spent
a lot of time with adults, I find that there's
the missing part for a lot of people's lives. Is
the joy, is the play, is the sparkle, is the
having fun. And we seem too as adults, go, oh,
(12:14):
we can't do certain things because of some strange rules
that says that you're too old to wear that, or
you're too old to do that. And I wonder as
kids get wiser and older, they're starting to tap into it.
So when I think about this and that loss, I
(12:35):
mean justin you're you're the parenting expert here, but I
would suggest they've got a lot going on in their
brains that they're trying to navigate at that same time
as well.
Speaker 4 (12:45):
And this might seem like a little bit of fluffy advice,
but I.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Really think it can walk alongside the guidance that you
would give.
Speaker 4 (12:53):
But it's be the role model for fun. Fun is infectious.
Speaker 3 (12:57):
You know, get the kids out there having adventures and
doing things with their bodies. I think when we're doing
have you ever heard of the big Wedgie. It's a slide,
like it's a massive water slide.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
I haven't heard of it, but it sounds awful.
Speaker 4 (13:14):
Yeah it does.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
And when they say big big Weggie, they really mean it.
Speaker 4 (13:18):
It's really big weggie.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
But I took my kids there recently and instead of
the three of them heading off and going down, and
I was like, I'm coming as well. And as I
was sliding down, because I'm really heightened to how they're feeling.
Speaker 4 (13:35):
And you know, as a parent, you are like, is
everyone okay? I'm probably that parent. Everyone every fun is
everything perfect to Harwood. But I was looking at my child.
Speaker 3 (13:44):
As he was sliding down, and I was like, oh, right,
there is the joy.
Speaker 4 (13:49):
There is the moment.
Speaker 3 (13:50):
And he was not, and nor was my daughter thinking
about their tummy or their thighs, or the fact that
one was short.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
He wanted to be talld nothing in that moment. So
I think if we can be very aware as.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Parents to make the time for adventure and what I
call sparkle activities, which is the things that you do
that give you a rush, I think it will have
an impact.
Speaker 5 (14:15):
Diyaking, that is the Australian of the Year for twenty
twenty three, Taran Brumfort.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
Taran joined me for the mis Connection Summit.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
You can hear the entire conversation by going to Happy
Families dot com dot Au and downloading the Misconnection Summit.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Just google it and it will pop up in your feed.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
Loads of great conversations with inspiring and pretty incredible people,
just like our Australian of the Year, Tarran Brumfort joining
us on the Happy Families podcast. Thank you so much
for listening today. I can't wait to be with you
again tomorrow as we talk about more things sort of
food and body related. I'm going to be catching up
with deb Blakely from Kids Dig Food talking about what
(14:59):
to do about kids fussiness over lunchboxes. The Happy Families
Podcast is produced by Justin Rowland from Bridge Media.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
Craig Bruce is our executive producer.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
For more information about making your family happier, check us
out at Happy families dot com dot Au.
It's the Happy Families Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
It's the podcast for.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
The time poor parent who just wants answers Now. Hello,
this is doctor Justin Colson.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Thank you so much for choosing to listen to the
Happy Families Podcast today. Tarren Brumfort, you may be familiar
with the name after last week's announcement of the Australian
of the Year.
Speaker 3 (00:23):
It's about the way that we feel about all of ourselves,
our skin color, our height, our age, our gender. When
you take your final breath on this earth, what thoughts
will be going through your mind? And no one has
ever said to me the size of their bum.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Tarren Brumfort, an Adelaide documentary maker and activist, has been
not just nominated, but actually proclaimed.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
To the Australian of the Year because of her work.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Around the way we view our bodies. What you may
not know is that Taran joined me just over a
year ago to talk about this very topic in the
Misconnection Summit. You can find the sum online and you
can purchase it and listen to all of the amazing content,
the incredible talks to help you if you're raising a
teenage girl today with the weld, the everyday challenges that
(01:09):
we're facing. But in the Misconnection Summit, I was talking
with Tara and about all the stuff that she's now
the Australian of the Year four and we started off
our conversation by talking about how difficult body image challenges
are right now for young people and how they're different
for boys and girls.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
This is what she had to say.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Gosh, well, it's not great when you look at the
situation that is, but it's also actually no surprise either
because we live in a world that really doesn't support
anyone to have a positive relationship with their body. But
I don't want to paint a disastrous picture here because
I want us to feel a little light and with
some hope when we leave this call. It's not like
(01:52):
we've got this big problem and we don't have any
solutions to it, like we actually do. I think for
us to change and for us to navigate this landscape,
we need to understand what is going on out there and.
Speaker 4 (02:07):
What's at play.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
We have these industries that are preying on our insecurities.
Is their trillion dollar industries beauty, cosmetic, diet, and what
they're doing is they're setting us up to have problems
and for our girls as well. And you know, these
problems that I refer to, they aren't actually problems in
(02:30):
the first place. But these industries are offering products to
problems that don't exist.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
And it's all about the dollar. And I think if we.
Speaker 3 (02:40):
Can understand what's at play, who's delivering the messages, the
why behind the messages, it makes it a whole lot
less powerful when.
Speaker 4 (02:50):
They're coming at us, if we can see it for
what it is.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
So I think if we lived in a world that
celebrated bodies and different shapes and sizes and abilities, we
wouldn't have these issues. So I think the first thing
that we really need to do is go, yes, it's
a big problem.
Speaker 4 (03:08):
You only need to walk down.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
A shopping mall, which I do on occasion with my
own kids, and I remember when they were younger, I
almost just wanted to cover their eyes and like, don't
look at this, but we needed to go shopping.
Speaker 4 (03:21):
But it's just we do get bombarded by these images.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
I think the key is to understand where they're coming
from and the why that sits behind them.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
And it's the dollar. It's money they're making money from
making us feel crap.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
I guess what I really want people to walk away
after watching this knowing is that we weren't born into
the world hating our bodies. We have learned this as
a behavior. It wasn't meant to be our life purpose.
To hate on our body.
Speaker 4 (03:53):
And be at war with our body is just not
the way it's meant to be.
Speaker 3 (03:57):
So if we can just take a moment, take it
step back, think about is the relationship that I have
I'm having with my body is it serving me? Do
I feel good when I go out into the world.
And if the answer is no, then what are you
going to do differently? And I think taking taking stock
of what's going on will help. Now you gave me
(04:18):
a double barrel question, which I think is quite cruel.
For the first question, and just before we started, everyone
Justin's like, are you shuffling papers? I'm like, oh gosh,
yes I am, because I always have to take notes
because I've got so much I want to I want
to say, so occasionally you're going to hear a little
paper shuffle everyone, but just just go with me. The
second point of that question was about boys and girls.
(04:40):
There are different pressures. Boys have this pressure to be
to be manly, to be tall, to be strong and
girls to be pretty. I remember at the Adelaide Airport once.
I remember walking through and there was a surfwear label
and there was two advertisements, both promoting the same piece
(05:02):
of clothing.
Speaker 4 (05:03):
And for the guys they were doing on the.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Surfboard, and for the girls they were like looking at
the surfboard but looking pretty. And I just I stopped
in my tracks and I looked at this, and I
was like, and there is the problem. We teach our
boys often to do and be adventurous, and we often
tell our girls to look a certain way. So it's
no surprise that we've sort of ended up where we've
(05:27):
ended up.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
That's really interesting. I hadn't thought of it like that before,
and I've done a lot of thinking around this area.
But it's actually as a different message, isn't it. Guys
are always active, Guys are using their bodies. Girls don't
use their bodies except in an ornamental way. They have
to look particularly. I'm not trying to do this for
product place, but everyone knows that I've written the book,
(05:49):
so I'm not trying to sort of give myself a
plug here, but I'd love to share something.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
As I was listening to what you said.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
I really when I wrote this book, I talked to
more than four hundred Australian girls about what it is
to be a teenager. And given there it's been a
long time since I was a teenager and I've never
been a girl, this was really eye opening for me,
even though I'm raising six daughters of my own. And
when the body image questions came up, I developed three rules.
(06:20):
They're not one hundred percent iron clad, but they're pretty
close and I'd love to hear what you think about them.
Based on what you've just said in my data and
what I heard in my conversations where body image was
raised as an issue, these three themes consistently showed up.
Number One, a girl's body predicts which social groups she
can belong to. If you want to be popular, you
(06:41):
have to be hot. Number two, the combination of a
girl's body and her social group impacts her identity. In
other words, I'll feel good about myself and who I'm
becoming if my body is hot and I'm in the
cool group. And number three, social media and media the
superpermore generally, which would include surf shops that have got
these big billboards and what have you. They set the
(07:03):
standard for what's hot, and therefore who's popular, and therefore
what a girl should feel about herself. Does that resonate
for you?
Speaker 4 (07:12):
Absolutely it does. I mean, here's the thing about if.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
We unpack it, this was going to come later, I
think in the conversation, but I think it's good to
go there now, this whole beauty ideal. And again I'm
doing the same, I'm not plugging. A lot of people
would have seen Embrace the documentary, and it's free on
Netflix right now. We go through beauty through the ages,
what it was like to be a woman in her
(07:39):
twenties in nineteen twenties, sorry not in her twenties, when
the pressure was to be thinned straight up and down,
small breasts, and then in the nineteen fifties it was
about having a voluptuous body and larger breasts and a
cinched waist. And then in the eighties it was the
supermodel where it was very athletic bodies, and there was
(08:00):
the nineties the waife.
Speaker 4 (08:02):
Look, if you stop.
Speaker 3 (08:05):
To think about how preposterous it is that somebody, you know,
these industries are like, well, this is what we're going
to determine this decade to be beautiful, and to everybody
who doesn't fall into this construct, you're not going to
be very happy with your body because you know this
is where it's at. And I just I liken that too,
(08:25):
sort of when people get on TV and they're like, well,
this season you should wear, It's like, I'm just gonna
wear what I want this season. Like I'm not a sheep.
I'm not going to follow someone else's trend. And I
think if we can encourage our girls and really challenge
ourselves as human beings as to why we perhaps like
(08:46):
something then and then challenge our girls to really pave
their own way and make up their own rules, it's
like see it and I'm sorry I digress here, but
I've been very much in creative mode. I think visually
is everybody but Sea would have been told to have
taken the wig off by a thousand different people it will.
Speaker 4 (09:07):
Ruin your career, and she didn't. She did it her way.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
And I think there is such power in defining what
beauty means to you. And when I was in New
York filming a few years ago, I met some of
the Victoria's Secrets models, and I have.
Speaker 4 (09:26):
To say when I chatted with them, and only a couple.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
I'm not sort of saying this broadly, but these were
women that people would look at on Instagram and be like,
oh my.
Speaker 4 (09:38):
Gosh, you are so beautiful.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
And I tell you what, I didn't have one beautiful
word come out of their mouth, or there was no
interaction with them that was nice in any way, shape
or form. It was just it was very cold and
just not beautiful, if you know what I'm saying. So
I think we really need to turn upside down this
notion of what beauty actually means. And it has nothing
(10:03):
to do with how someone looks. It's got to do
with the energy exchange and how someone makes you feel.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
I really love. We need to actually rediscover that concept
of what beauty is. I might even get weepy when
I think about this, but my wife's smiling at me.
That's beauty. Looking at her eyes, I just go, oh,
this is magic to me, this is gorgeous. I've got
footage of my kids up until about the age of
(10:29):
eight or nine, So as I mentioned six daughters, I've
got footage of them and photos of them running around
the pool. They're playing their goofing off up until the
age of nine or ten. They don't even think about
how they look. They've got the sticky addy tummies. They're
wearing what it is comfortable, or they're not wearing anything
at all, because like when they're kids, who cares, right,
their hair's crazy, they're living life. Young kids, they don't
(10:52):
even think about what beauty is, and there's someone affected
by how they look and they just stoked about what
their bodies can do.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
What have you seen about.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
When kids start to lose this and start to think
about beauty and how do we stop them from losing it?
Speaker 3 (11:08):
Yeah, I've done a lot of thinking on this, and
I think and this is anecdotally, this is from my
experience in my circles and knowing exactly what.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
You're talking about, and there's a great sense of loss.
Speaker 3 (11:19):
Especially when you've seen your own kids, where you're like,
something's changing.
Speaker 4 (11:24):
Now.
Speaker 3 (11:24):
My kids are now fifteen, thirteen, eleven, and nine, so
I'm kind of right in the spot of seeing changes
in changes, praying for changes not to happen from the
younger ones.
Speaker 4 (11:35):
But it does.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
I wonder whether it's because as their parents, we are
their kings and queens and they are taking everything that
we say and do in there, they're like sponges and
they're absorbing.
Speaker 4 (11:51):
I wonder whether they.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Adopt some of our philosophies as adults, because having spent
a lot of time with adults, I find that there's
the missing part for a lot of people's lives. Is
the joy, is the play, is the sparkle, is the
having fun. And we seem too as adults, go, oh,
(12:14):
we can't do certain things because of some strange rules
that says that you're too old to wear that, or
you're too old to do that. And I wonder as
kids get wiser and older, they're starting to tap into it.
So when I think about this and that loss, I
(12:35):
mean justin you're you're the parenting expert here, but I
would suggest they've got a lot going on in their
brains that they're trying to navigate at that same time
as well.
Speaker 4 (12:45):
And this might seem like a little bit of fluffy advice,
but I.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Really think it can walk alongside the guidance that you
would give.
Speaker 4 (12:53):
But it's be the role model for fun. Fun is infectious.
Speaker 3 (12:57):
You know, get the kids out there having adventures and
doing things with their bodies. I think when we're doing
have you ever heard of the big Wedgie. It's a slide,
like it's a massive water slide.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
I haven't heard of it, but it sounds awful.
Speaker 4 (13:14):
Yeah it does.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
And when they say big big Weggie, they really mean it.
Speaker 4 (13:18):
It's really big weggie.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
But I took my kids there recently and instead of
the three of them heading off and going down, and
I was like, I'm coming as well. And as I
was sliding down, because I'm really heightened to how they're feeling.
Speaker 4 (13:35):
And you know, as a parent, you are like, is
everyone okay? I'm probably that parent. Everyone every fun is
everything perfect to Harwood. But I was looking at my child.
Speaker 3 (13:44):
As he was sliding down, and I was like, oh, right,
there is the joy.
Speaker 4 (13:49):
There is the moment.
Speaker 3 (13:50):
And he was not, and nor was my daughter thinking
about their tummy or their thighs, or the fact that
one was short.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
He wanted to be talld nothing in that moment. So
I think if we can be very aware as.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Parents to make the time for adventure and what I
call sparkle activities, which is the things that you do
that give you a rush, I think it will have
an impact.
Speaker 5 (14:15):
Diyaking, that is the Australian of the Year for twenty
twenty three, Taran Brumfort.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
Taran joined me for the mis Connection Summit.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
You can hear the entire conversation by going to Happy
Families dot com dot Au and downloading the Misconnection Summit.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Just google it and it will pop up in your feed.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
Loads of great conversations with inspiring and pretty incredible people,
just like our Australian of the Year, Tarran Brumfort joining
us on the Happy Families podcast. Thank you so much
for listening today. I can't wait to be with you
again tomorrow as we talk about more things sort of
food and body related. I'm going to be catching up
with deb Blakely from Kids Dig Food talking about what
(14:59):
to do about kids fussiness over lunchboxes. The Happy Families
Podcast is produced by Justin Rowland from Bridge Media.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
Craig Bruce is our executive producer.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
For more information about making your family happier, check us
out at Happy families dot com dot Au.
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