November 24, 2025 • 11 mins
Kids have a magical way of asking the biggest questions at the most unexpected moments. In this episode, we walk you through exactly how to respond when your six-year-old suddenly wants to know how a baby gets into Mum’s tummy—without oversharing, freezing, or fumbling. You’ll learn the calm, clear, developmentally-appropriate way to keep curiosity open, connection strong, and panic levels low.
KEY POINTS
- Why kids ask tricky questions earlier than we expect
- How to give truthful but minimal info that fits their age
- The “glass of water, not a fire hose” rule
- How to delay the conversation gracefully when you need time
- Why your response now decides if they’ll keep coming to you later
- Simple language you can use with a six-year-old
- Teaching kids that these chats belong at home—not the playground
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
“Answer the question your child is asking—no more, no less.”
RESOURCES MENTIONED
- Where Do Babies Come From? by Michelle Mitchell
- A Girl’s Guide to Puberty – Michelle Mitchell
- A Guy’s Guide to Puberty – Michelle Mitchell
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
- Keep answers short, truthful, and developmentally-appropriate.
- Use correct anatomical terms without going into extra detail.
- If you’re unprepared, buy time: “That’s a great question—let’s talk with Mum/Dad together.”
- Set clear boundaries: these conversations happen at home, not with friends.
- Revisit the topic later as your child grows and becomes ready for more.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
Oh my goodness. Every now and again, our kids ask
us questions that we aren't quite ready for, and we
certainly have not got an answer well practiced, well rehearsed
and ready to go. And today it's a tricky question
about a six year old who asked her dad, Jason,
exactly one of those kinds of questions. Daddy, I might
only be six, but I'd like to know where babies
(00:26):
come from. Well, not exactly those words, but pretty much yet,
how do you, I mean, there's age appropriate, developmentally appropriate
ways of having these conversations, but what do you say
when you're six year old's asking big questions about ppropriation
and intimacy. We answer that with today's tricky question. Next
on The Happy Family's podcast, Hello, welcome to the Happy
(00:48):
Families podcast, where you get real parenting solutions every single day.
We are Australia's most downloaded parenting podcast. Thanks so much
for joining us. Today we have a question from Jason,
who has gone to Happy families dot com. You clicked
on the record button with our super simple system where
you literally just push the button and start talking. Here
is what Jason asked.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
I justin loved the podcast. My name is Jason, father
to a six year old girl. She loves pretend looking
after baby dolls and the other day asked me how
do babies get into mum's tummies? Appreciate your help. Thanks.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
Have you noticed we're getting more and more dads asking
us these tricky questions?
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Isn't it great?
Speaker 3 (01:27):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
I love the dads are involved with their kids and
having these discussions. It's fantastic.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
And I also chuckle just a little bit that a
conversation like this with two adults is not particularly tricky, right,
but a conversation with a six year old has a
squirming in our seat, so funny.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
I also love that a little girl is not afraid
to ask a dad a simple question like that, like
happy to go with the mum? Happy to go with dad?
The question has been asked. So handful of things that
we need to highlight here. The first thing is that
from about the age of eight, Michelle Mitchell, who I've
become a really big fan of over the over the years,
Michelle Mitchell has a series of books about this topic.
(02:04):
And I mean they're possibly suitable from the age of
six or seven, but really the designed for eight and up.
One of them is called Where do Babies Come From?
And Other Questions eight to twelve year olds ask. It
is a wise and helpful book, So, Jason, I think
that your six year olds probably a touch too young
for that, so we're going to give you some ideas,
(02:24):
some hints about what to talk about before then. But
Where do Babies Come From? By Michelle Mitchell is one
that you really want to get your hands on and
get ready to start sharing in about a year, eighteen months,
maybe two years at the most. I think you'll find
them really really helpful. She's also got two others, A
Girl's Guide to Puberty and A Guy's Guide to Puberty.
And our Emily, who is now eleven, has been reading
(02:46):
these for the last couple of years and she's pretty
well conversing with everything and just gets it and there's
no shock, there's no shame, there's no scare. It's just
really simple, Kylie. I mean, they've been on our bedside
table and on her bedside for ages and we just
get to have a chat now and then. I've found
them really really compelling and really really useful.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
So I would actually be starting with the Puberty conversation
with my six year old as opposed to going straight
to the ins and outs of how babies are made.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
I can't believe that you said that. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I can't believe that I said that about you saying that,
you know what, though, I mean the direct question was
how does baby get inside bummy's tummy? And so having
a conversation about puberty maybe earlier. Ultimately, I think at
the age of six, we're realistically a fraction ahead of development,
(03:35):
and we don't really need to get too into the details,
into the nitty gritty of procreation and intimacy.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
And while a six year old's asking those questions, she's
going to be happy, for the most part, with some
really simple answers. Yeah, but I think the thing that
I would love to emphasize is, just like you said
at this point is as a six year old, she's
actually gone to dad with this question, like she's not
(04:04):
she's number one, she's curious, but number two, she's not
uncomfortable with asking Mum or Dad.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
This is just a child like curiosity, and you.
Speaker 3 (04:12):
Want her to stay this way for as long as
she can. So the way you respond to her will
determine whether or not she brings her next tricky question
to you or not?
Speaker 1 (04:20):
So I want to pick up on the first thing
you said. There's more to say about the second thing
you've just said about the way we respond. But when
kids come to us with tricky questions as parents, we
kind of there's a little bit of anxiety, and we
want to release the anxiety in the pressure by telling
them everything. And also we want to be helpful, so
we kind of want to tell them everything. Our impulse
as parents is to tell like kids everything. And to
(04:43):
the metaphor that I use is when somebody asks for
a drink, do you give them a glass of watery?
Do you turn on the fire hose? And with these
conversations around intimacy and procreation and these private parts of
our body, I think we really do want to tread
care and make sure that we're being developmentally appropriate for
our kids. So answer questions to the degree that your
(05:07):
child is curious, but don't go any further. Give them
that glass of water, don't turn on the hose. If
they've got more questions, they'll ask those questions and then
you can it's just drop by drop by drop. You
don't want to you don't want to give them the
entire Encyclopedia of intimacy on the first conversation at the
age of six. This is something that they'll grow into
(05:30):
over time, and usually a short, brief answer, particularly at
this young age, will be enough to satisfy their curiosity.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
But I also think it's really fair to suggest if
your child asks you a really curly question, that delaying
it for a short period of time is completely appropriate.
That's a great question, and I think that that's one
that Mummy and I should both talk to you about.
That gives you a little bit of time between stimulus
(05:58):
and response for you to come up with an answer
that you feel comfortable with together, and it takes the
pressure of having to answer it in the moment. So
you're not shrugging her off. You're not telling her that
you know this is not important. You're saying this is
so important. I actually want to have a conversation with
Mummy about this as well.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
One of my favorite conversations that I love to share
on the pod is that time when one of our
kids asked, I think she was fourteen or thirteen at
the time, Dad WA's an STI and we were in
the caf two minutes I could have given her a
quick answer, but I thought, no, this one is serious
enough that we probably should have a proper chat about it.
And so I said, let's talk about it on Sundays
as a family, because we have our tricky talks with
(06:36):
our kids on a Sunday. And that conversation I thought
would go for about five to seven minutes. I really
didn't think the kids would care or want to talk
about it, and forty five minutes later we were still going.
But it was developmentally appropriate. We had the right children
in the room for the conversation and they were really
curious about it, and it ended up being a really enjoyable, fulfilling,
meaningful discussion. So I think, whether you're kicking it down
(06:58):
the road by an hour or TiO two, or whether
you're pushing it a month or two down the track,
once you've said to your child, oh, that's a really
important question, let's talk about it with mummy later, you
can do that in a month or even in six months.
Like children, just because they're asking a question, sometimes, honestly,
sometimes they will forget. And with a six year old
on a question like this, I think something short and brief,
(07:20):
something calm and relaxed is enough After break, Kylie, a
little bit more about how we can start to share
some more detailed responses to children who really are curious,
who don't want to let it go, and who you're
trying to keep off the Internet because you just know
that's not where they're going to get their best answers.
Stay with us on the Happy Families Podcast. This is
(07:49):
the Happy Families podcast where you get real parenting solutions
every single day. If you're enjoying the pod, please like, share, follow,
and leave a five star rating and review so other
people can find out about the pods to make their
families happier. Kylie. From my point of view, this is
a conversation pretty simply where we just want to give
minimal information and as kids get older, like what you
(08:10):
tell them at six is a little bit different to
what you tell them at eight, which is a bit
different to what you're tell them at ten, which is
definitely different to what they're hearing at fifteen. And then
with us, I mean, we've got kids in their twenties now,
and the conversations we're having with them are very, very
different to the conversations that we'd have with our eleven
year old.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
So essentially, you're actually starting to lay a foundation of
what it looks like to have a tricky to answer
tricky questions in a calm and peaceful environment.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
That satisfies the curiosity for now, according to your child's
developmental capacity and trajectory.
Speaker 3 (08:44):
So the first thing I think is really important to
acknowledge is that she doesn't need the whole truth. She
needs the truth. I think it's important that we don't
lie to or we don't talk about storks and you know, kind.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
Of words and bees, whatever else you.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
Know, kind of comes to our mind metaphors and things.
We need to tell her the truth. We need to
tell it actual facts. But she doesn't need to know
all of it, right, She just needs to know enough
to curb a curiosity for now.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
So here's what can I say? What I'm thinking? Or
do you want to jump in with? So what I'm
thinking is use the appropriate terms, But with a six
year old, I'd probably say inside every mummy is something
called a uterus. You've got one inside you, but it's
just not grown up yet, and there are little things
called eggs inside that uterus. They're so small, these eggs
that you can't even see them, and one day, when
(09:29):
you become a mummy, those eggs can sometimes if the
conditions are right, they can turn into babies. So the
babies actually happen inside you, And isn't that incredible? And
maybe they were curious, maybe they won't and you can
just you can literally just kick it down the road.
Then you could say, well, you asked how that happens,
and that's how it happens. That's all the information they need.
And you can literally just say that. And as you
(09:50):
get a bit older, I can explain more about that
to you and just let it go.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
And I think that that's the most important thing. It's
suggesting you've given her a little bit of information, and
I would suggest that that's probably going to be enough
for her now. But if it's not, you can say,
this is actually quite a complex question that you've asked,
and Mummy and Daddy feel like you just need to
be a little bit older before we have that conversation.
Do you think we could come back and talk about
this in a few months time, or we want to
(10:17):
have this conversation when you're eight or whatever it is,
whatever your timeline is that you feel more comfortable with
more times than I don't think we've ever had a
child push back and go no.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
No, I asked you, and I know now that's right everything.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
But they'll also come to you and say you told
me that you were going to talk to me about this,
and I'm mate, now I want to know. And so
I just think it's really important you honor whatever it
is that you decide is the appropriate time frame. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:45):
Something else that's just popped in my head as well,
is you really want to emphasize these conversations and conversations
that mummies and daddy's have with their children. These aren't
the sorts of things that you talk about in the playground.
You really want to do your best to keep them focused.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
On I'm so glad you came and talked to me
about this. You've got any other questions.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
Come and talk to me, don't talk to other people.
I'm the person to talk to me. Yeah, well, Jason,
we really hope that that's been a helpful discussion and
helps you to navigate this one with your six year old.
If you've got a tricky question, please get in touch
with us. You can submit your questions via voice notes,
email them to podcasts at Happy families dot com dot au.
That's podcasts with an S at happy families dot com
dot you, or you can pretty much ask us anything
(11:27):
via the super simple system at happy families dot com
dot au. The Happy Families podcast is produced by Justin
Ruland from Bridge Media. Mimhammonds provides research, admin and a
whole lot of other support and if you would like
to find more resources to make your family happier, check
out those books by Michelle Mitchell. You can find them
by googling her name or going to her website and
(11:47):
visit happyfamilies dot com dot you
Oh my goodness. Every now and again, our kids ask
us questions that we aren't quite ready for, and we
certainly have not got an answer well practiced, well rehearsed
and ready to go. And today it's a tricky question
about a six year old who asked her dad, Jason,
exactly one of those kinds of questions. Daddy, I might
only be six, but I'd like to know where babies
(00:26):
come from. Well, not exactly those words, but pretty much yet,
how do you, I mean, there's age appropriate, developmentally appropriate
ways of having these conversations, but what do you say
when you're six year old's asking big questions about ppropriation
and intimacy. We answer that with today's tricky question. Next
on The Happy Family's podcast, Hello, welcome to the Happy
(00:48):
Families podcast, where you get real parenting solutions every single day.
We are Australia's most downloaded parenting podcast. Thanks so much
for joining us. Today we have a question from Jason,
who has gone to Happy families dot com. You clicked
on the record button with our super simple system where
you literally just push the button and start talking. Here
is what Jason asked.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
I justin loved the podcast. My name is Jason, father
to a six year old girl. She loves pretend looking
after baby dolls and the other day asked me how
do babies get into mum's tummies? Appreciate your help. Thanks.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
Have you noticed we're getting more and more dads asking
us these tricky questions?
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Isn't it great?
Speaker 3 (01:27):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
I love the dads are involved with their kids and
having these discussions. It's fantastic.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
And I also chuckle just a little bit that a
conversation like this with two adults is not particularly tricky, right,
but a conversation with a six year old has a
squirming in our seat, so funny.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
I also love that a little girl is not afraid
to ask a dad a simple question like that, like
happy to go with the mum? Happy to go with dad?
The question has been asked. So handful of things that
we need to highlight here. The first thing is that
from about the age of eight, Michelle Mitchell, who I've
become a really big fan of over the over the years,
Michelle Mitchell has a series of books about this topic.
(02:04):
And I mean they're possibly suitable from the age of
six or seven, but really the designed for eight and up.
One of them is called Where do Babies Come From?
And Other Questions eight to twelve year olds ask. It
is a wise and helpful book, So, Jason, I think
that your six year olds probably a touch too young
for that, so we're going to give you some ideas,
(02:24):
some hints about what to talk about before then. But
Where do Babies Come From? By Michelle Mitchell is one
that you really want to get your hands on and
get ready to start sharing in about a year, eighteen months,
maybe two years at the most. I think you'll find
them really really helpful. She's also got two others, A
Girl's Guide to Puberty and A Guy's Guide to Puberty.
And our Emily, who is now eleven, has been reading
(02:46):
these for the last couple of years and she's pretty
well conversing with everything and just gets it and there's
no shock, there's no shame, there's no scare. It's just
really simple, Kylie. I mean, they've been on our bedside
table and on her bedside for ages and we just
get to have a chat now and then. I've found
them really really compelling and really really useful.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
So I would actually be starting with the Puberty conversation
with my six year old as opposed to going straight
to the ins and outs of how babies are made.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
I can't believe that you said that. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I can't believe that I said that about you saying that,
you know what, though, I mean the direct question was
how does baby get inside bummy's tummy? And so having
a conversation about puberty maybe earlier. Ultimately, I think at
the age of six, we're realistically a fraction ahead of development,
(03:35):
and we don't really need to get too into the details,
into the nitty gritty of procreation and intimacy.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
And while a six year old's asking those questions, she's
going to be happy, for the most part, with some
really simple answers. Yeah, but I think the thing that
I would love to emphasize is, just like you said
at this point is as a six year old, she's
actually gone to dad with this question, like she's not
(04:04):
she's number one, she's curious, but number two, she's not
uncomfortable with asking Mum or Dad.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
This is just a child like curiosity, and you.
Speaker 3 (04:12):
Want her to stay this way for as long as
she can. So the way you respond to her will
determine whether or not she brings her next tricky question
to you or not?
Speaker 1 (04:20):
So I want to pick up on the first thing
you said. There's more to say about the second thing
you've just said about the way we respond. But when
kids come to us with tricky questions as parents, we
kind of there's a little bit of anxiety, and we
want to release the anxiety in the pressure by telling
them everything. And also we want to be helpful, so
we kind of want to tell them everything. Our impulse
as parents is to tell like kids everything. And to
(04:43):
the metaphor that I use is when somebody asks for
a drink, do you give them a glass of watery?
Do you turn on the fire hose? And with these
conversations around intimacy and procreation and these private parts of
our body, I think we really do want to tread
care and make sure that we're being developmentally appropriate for
our kids. So answer questions to the degree that your
(05:07):
child is curious, but don't go any further. Give them
that glass of water, don't turn on the hose. If
they've got more questions, they'll ask those questions and then
you can it's just drop by drop by drop. You
don't want to you don't want to give them the
entire Encyclopedia of intimacy on the first conversation at the
age of six. This is something that they'll grow into
(05:30):
over time, and usually a short, brief answer, particularly at
this young age, will be enough to satisfy their curiosity.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
But I also think it's really fair to suggest if
your child asks you a really curly question, that delaying
it for a short period of time is completely appropriate.
That's a great question, and I think that that's one
that Mummy and I should both talk to you about.
That gives you a little bit of time between stimulus
(05:58):
and response for you to come up with an answer
that you feel comfortable with together, and it takes the
pressure of having to answer it in the moment. So
you're not shrugging her off. You're not telling her that
you know this is not important. You're saying this is
so important. I actually want to have a conversation with
Mummy about this as well.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
One of my favorite conversations that I love to share
on the pod is that time when one of our
kids asked, I think she was fourteen or thirteen at
the time, Dad WA's an STI and we were in
the caf two minutes I could have given her a
quick answer, but I thought, no, this one is serious
enough that we probably should have a proper chat about it.
And so I said, let's talk about it on Sundays
as a family, because we have our tricky talks with
(06:36):
our kids on a Sunday. And that conversation I thought
would go for about five to seven minutes. I really
didn't think the kids would care or want to talk
about it, and forty five minutes later we were still going.
But it was developmentally appropriate. We had the right children
in the room for the conversation and they were really
curious about it, and it ended up being a really enjoyable, fulfilling,
meaningful discussion. So I think, whether you're kicking it down
(06:58):
the road by an hour or TiO two, or whether
you're pushing it a month or two down the track,
once you've said to your child, oh, that's a really
important question, let's talk about it with mummy later, you
can do that in a month or even in six months.
Like children, just because they're asking a question, sometimes, honestly,
sometimes they will forget. And with a six year old
on a question like this, I think something short and brief,
(07:20):
something calm and relaxed is enough After break, Kylie, a
little bit more about how we can start to share
some more detailed responses to children who really are curious,
who don't want to let it go, and who you're
trying to keep off the Internet because you just know
that's not where they're going to get their best answers.
Stay with us on the Happy Families Podcast. This is
(07:49):
the Happy Families podcast where you get real parenting solutions
every single day. If you're enjoying the pod, please like, share, follow,
and leave a five star rating and review so other
people can find out about the pods to make their
families happier. Kylie. From my point of view, this is
a conversation pretty simply where we just want to give
minimal information and as kids get older, like what you
(08:10):
tell them at six is a little bit different to
what you tell them at eight, which is a bit
different to what you're tell them at ten, which is
definitely different to what they're hearing at fifteen. And then
with us, I mean, we've got kids in their twenties now,
and the conversations we're having with them are very, very
different to the conversations that we'd have with our eleven
year old.
Speaker 3 (08:26):
So essentially, you're actually starting to lay a foundation of
what it looks like to have a tricky to answer
tricky questions in a calm and peaceful environment.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
That satisfies the curiosity for now, according to your child's
developmental capacity and trajectory.
Speaker 3 (08:44):
So the first thing I think is really important to
acknowledge is that she doesn't need the whole truth. She
needs the truth. I think it's important that we don't
lie to or we don't talk about storks and you know, kind.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
Of words and bees, whatever else you.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
Know, kind of comes to our mind metaphors and things.
We need to tell her the truth. We need to
tell it actual facts. But she doesn't need to know
all of it, right, She just needs to know enough
to curb a curiosity for now.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
So here's what can I say? What I'm thinking? Or
do you want to jump in with? So what I'm
thinking is use the appropriate terms, But with a six
year old, I'd probably say inside every mummy is something
called a uterus. You've got one inside you, but it's
just not grown up yet, and there are little things
called eggs inside that uterus. They're so small, these eggs
that you can't even see them, and one day, when
(09:29):
you become a mummy, those eggs can sometimes if the
conditions are right, they can turn into babies. So the
babies actually happen inside you, And isn't that incredible? And
maybe they were curious, maybe they won't and you can
just you can literally just kick it down the road.
Then you could say, well, you asked how that happens,
and that's how it happens. That's all the information they need.
And you can literally just say that. And as you
(09:50):
get a bit older, I can explain more about that
to you and just let it go.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
And I think that that's the most important thing. It's
suggesting you've given her a little bit of information, and
I would suggest that that's probably going to be enough
for her now. But if it's not, you can say,
this is actually quite a complex question that you've asked,
and Mummy and Daddy feel like you just need to
be a little bit older before we have that conversation.
Do you think we could come back and talk about
this in a few months time, or we want to
(10:17):
have this conversation when you're eight or whatever it is,
whatever your timeline is that you feel more comfortable with
more times than I don't think we've ever had a
child push back and go no.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
No, I asked you, and I know now that's right everything.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
But they'll also come to you and say you told
me that you were going to talk to me about this,
and I'm mate, now I want to know. And so
I just think it's really important you honor whatever it
is that you decide is the appropriate time frame. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:45):
Something else that's just popped in my head as well,
is you really want to emphasize these conversations and conversations
that mummies and daddy's have with their children. These aren't
the sorts of things that you talk about in the playground.
You really want to do your best to keep them focused.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
On I'm so glad you came and talked to me
about this. You've got any other questions.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
Come and talk to me, don't talk to other people.
I'm the person to talk to me. Yeah, well, Jason,
we really hope that that's been a helpful discussion and
helps you to navigate this one with your six year old.
If you've got a tricky question, please get in touch
with us. You can submit your questions via voice notes,
email them to podcasts at Happy families dot com dot au.
That's podcasts with an S at happy families dot com
dot you, or you can pretty much ask us anything
(11:27):
via the super simple system at happy families dot com
dot au. The Happy Families podcast is produced by Justin
Ruland from Bridge Media. Mimhammonds provides research, admin and a
whole lot of other support and if you would like
to find more resources to make your family happier, check
out those books by Michelle Mitchell. You can find them
by googling her name or going to her website and
(11:47):
visit happyfamilies dot com dot you
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