FULL SHOW: Social Media CRINGE!

When have you CRINGED at a social media post? Wait until you hear these stories!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Well he's our podcast, friendy, here.

Speaker 2 (00:02):
Is our podcast. We talked about all kinds of things today.

Speaker 1 (00:04):
The Bogan bullet going from Melbourne to Bali.

Speaker 2 (00:07):
To be on a small plane with people drinking a
lot of alcohol on their way to a holiday in Bali,
people start fighting. What a nightmare?

Speaker 1 (00:16):
It is?

Speaker 2 (00:16):
My nightmare.

Speaker 3 (00:19):
Peter Dutton living at Curabilly does this pass the pub?

Speaker 2 (00:22):
He said that that's what he'll do if he becomes
prime minister. He wants everyone else to stop working from home. Well,
he lives in Queensland and his office if his Prime
Minister is in Canberra, So why would he be living
in Sydney.

Speaker 3 (00:32):
Because Sydney is the greatest city in the world, the
City by the Bay, the city that rocks, the city
that never sleeps.

Speaker 2 (00:37):
Okay, well sure there's that as well. We meet Jake Lambert,
UK comedian. I followed him for ages on Socials. He's
absolutely hilarious. Youre going to love him.

Speaker 3 (00:44):
And for seagull gets stuck in some fishing line. Does
anybody here? Oh yeah, everyone does and made the news
last night and gets my goullies.

Speaker 1 (00:53):
That's all coming up in this podcast.

Speaker 2 (00:58):
Everybody on.

Speaker 1 (01:04):
That a miracle of recording. We have so many requests.

Speaker 4 (01:07):
For them to do it again.

Speaker 1 (01:08):
Mistress Amanda's Miss Amanda doesn't work alone.

Speaker 2 (01:13):
Friend in making the tools of the train, I've.

Speaker 1 (01:16):
Heard them describe him as a drunken idiot.

Speaker 5 (01:20):
The legendary poet Jonesy and Amanda the actress wigs.

Speaker 2 (01:24):
Congratulations, man, we're there right now, Josey and Amanda. You're
doing a great job, silky giant, good radio.

Speaker 5 (01:35):
Sorry but it's a tongue tongue twist set Amanda's shoot.

Speaker 1 (01:41):
Timy, we're on the air. Top of the money to you, Amanda.

Speaker 2 (01:45):
Are you?

Speaker 1 (01:46):
I am very very well.

Speaker 2 (01:47):
Good to hear.

Speaker 3 (01:47):
I was watching Channel ten last night. You didn't tell
me about this. You've got another iron in the fire
with a new TV show.

Speaker 2 (01:55):
Well, what it is, I've got a I'm doing. I'm
the new David Attenborough without the hard work of having
to trek up mountains.

Speaker 1 (02:04):
And we're going to see you coming out of the
water in a wet suit.

Speaker 2 (02:06):
And people will love it, you know they will. I've
seen this is a it's a show call, have you.

Speaker 1 (02:12):
Yeah, we did the underwater record.

Speaker 2 (02:14):
Remember we were in the Guinness Book of Records for
doing the world's longest radio showing water and in the
photograph you can't tell who's you and who's me. I
don't know which one that compliments the most.

Speaker 1 (02:25):
I think you've been soldered us both.

Speaker 2 (02:26):
The show is called Airborne. It starts tomorrow actually on Channel.

Speaker 1 (02:30):
Ten, day before my birthday, and it's the most there's.

Speaker 2 (02:33):
Four parts to it, and Okay, I forgot to mention
it while I was reading this stuff, but it is
the most beautiful footage. And it's looking at not just birds,
but creatures and how they've adapted to be airborne. Snakes, gibbons,
just flying squirrels, the most incredible creatures as to how

(02:53):
they go about living their lives, to procreate, to find food,
to live in safety links. Their evolution has taken them
to be airborne.

Speaker 1 (03:02):
Don't need to play the priory, but.

Speaker 2 (03:04):
I'll play the prop. You got the promo, you've got
your little voice. Here we go. I'm more than a
tree climber, more than cold blooded, more than a web weaver,
and more than just a fish. I dare to be different.
I dare to defy gravity. We can fly further than

(03:26):
you think. We master the skies in our own unique way.
Watch us as take flod Airborne coming to Wednesdays. Fonten
tom ungraciously laughed through that, Tom, why is it amusing
to the class?

Speaker 1 (03:44):
Very very good?

Speaker 2 (03:45):
But the footage is quite extraordinary. It's beautiful. You love it.
I think you will love it.

Speaker 6 (03:51):
Well.

Speaker 3 (03:51):
I like everything that you do want too, except when
you're in Australia's most wanted.

Speaker 1 (03:55):
But you accidentally took that milk without paying for it.

Speaker 2 (03:58):
I know, and don't mentioned the fruits. I think I
got away with it.

Speaker 1 (04:02):
Fruh.

Speaker 2 (04:03):
You know what you're doing? It reading like it took
three hours to beat a one hour episode and so
you have to pace yourself through it. And you know
bits of it because after doing the radio I would
go in and record it. My voice was just shredded
by the end. I've got a new respect for people who.

Speaker 1 (04:18):
You remember I did Motorbike Cops.

Speaker 2 (04:21):
It was that same sort of majesty of through. That's good,
a mate, what's this fool doing? It's easier on the throat.

Speaker 1 (04:30):
Well, I look forward to watching it on Wednesday night.

Speaker 2 (04:32):
Okay, well you will.

Speaker 3 (04:33):
We have an action pack show for you today. We've
got a very funny comedian in joining us on the show.
This is one of your picks that you brought to
the table years.

Speaker 2 (04:40):
I've seen this guy on social media. He's really funny.

Speaker 1 (04:43):
He wraps up social media cringe.

Speaker 2 (04:45):
He's so funny, and we'll be talking to him. We
also have stacks of stuff. We've got first and last.

Speaker 1 (04:51):
Yeah, first and last caller on the show. What you
have Instagram? And first and last caller?

Speaker 3 (04:55):
So if you would like to call us right now,
first and last call it gets East Show tickets, fruits.

Speaker 1 (05:00):
To the pie.

Speaker 6 (05:00):
There.

Speaker 3 (05:01):
I used to show bag and the Jonesy demanded show
Bag thirteen ninety seven thirty six.

Speaker 1 (05:05):
Because we start the day with the magnificence set.

Speaker 2 (05:08):
And here's question number one, on which day do we
celebrate April Fool's Day?

Speaker 1 (05:12):
Yer nations, We have for.

Speaker 3 (05:14):
You the magnificent seven seven questions. Can you go all
the way and answer all seven questions correctly? If you
do that, Amanda will say.

Speaker 2 (05:21):
What I will say is I think my underpants are
talking to me. What I mean is that I've got
these range of undies. I'm not releasing a range of undies.
I have all the sale makers in town going great.

Speaker 1 (05:32):
There you go.

Speaker 2 (05:33):
I'll get some work for them every day. There's a
different thing in them. Most of the time it's different things. Well,
it's got writing in them.

Speaker 1 (05:41):
Okay, what's the writing.

Speaker 2 (05:42):
Today's is relish the day relish and usually it's just
three pairs have got hello again? Oh okay, which should
be on men's Undays because the're the ones that get
picked up off the floor for another crack, as it were.

Speaker 1 (05:55):
Yeah, right, let me know when you get to all
you can eat.

Speaker 2 (06:00):
Other underpants?

Speaker 1 (06:01):
Right? Where does it say this.

Speaker 2 (06:02):
On the front just when the fifth that goes under
your navel? No, I'm not going to show you on
the band? Yes, no, no, no, on the band. Okay,
the whole band was there.

Speaker 1 (06:13):
It's been some time.

Speaker 2 (06:15):
Mark the trumpets always Let's move on.

Speaker 1 (06:19):
Mark is him windsor Hello Mark?

Speaker 2 (06:22):
Mark? Hello, Hello, great and Mark as the first caller through. Yes,
you are getting our Royal Easter show pack.

Speaker 1 (06:33):
Awesome.

Speaker 2 (06:34):
So there it is. You get Easter show bag, I
mean our show bag. You get a family passed and
tickets to the Dodgers. A question number one, on which
day do we celebrate April Fool's Day?

Speaker 7 (06:47):
Today?

Speaker 1 (06:47):
April first?

Speaker 3 (06:48):
Yeah, anyone gets your mate, They're not going to get
you now because you still do it.

Speaker 1 (06:57):
We used to be a band.

Speaker 3 (07:00):
Remember remember rooftop identification for the cars going through the tunnel,
So it was a new way, a way to pay
the toll, which was fairer for everyone.

Speaker 1 (07:08):
You had to get your number plate printed on the roof.

Speaker 2 (07:10):
Of your car, and another time we said that seniors
would have to have a giant.

Speaker 1 (07:14):
Red S the S plate plate.

Speaker 2 (07:16):
Yeah, people went crazy, but I'm not a fan of
Then COVID came along and we thought people are struggling
bad jokes.

Speaker 3 (07:24):
We've probably ruined everyone else's April Fool's jokes, though you know.

Speaker 2 (07:27):
Probably been some of those courmudgeons. Question number two, What
does a CDC stand for?

Speaker 1 (07:33):
Ultimate?

Speaker 6 (07:35):
Wow?

Speaker 3 (07:36):
Sparky Mark?

Speaker 1 (07:39):
Let's play Lyrical Assassin?

Speaker 2 (07:43):
How does this go again?

Speaker 3 (07:44):
We wuote lyrics from a song Mark and you have
to guess where those lyrics are from.

Speaker 1 (07:48):
What are you? Brendan Husted Vus thin Vealis, don.

Speaker 3 (07:53):
Z it A lead for Dick vaugh No, I leave
for Dick.

Speaker 2 (08:00):
St sing it? You're not sing sing it? I lead
for Dick.

Speaker 8 (08:07):
Yeah, I've got no idea, even.

Speaker 2 (08:11):
Though you practically sang it, which breaks the rule.

Speaker 1 (08:13):
I haven't sung it. That's just the way I speak the.

Speaker 2 (08:15):
German chanelle chanelle and get to the end of it.

Speaker 1 (08:21):
Uh, do you want to have another crack of that?

Speaker 2 (08:23):
Let's see if Sally from Norman Hurst has any idea. Hello, Sally,
good morning. Do you want to hear it again? Here
you go, Brennan over to.

Speaker 1 (08:29):
You, Sally.

Speaker 3 (08:29):
I'm just having a casual conversation because vas zeit vermic
don sing each in lead for Dick.

Speaker 2 (08:40):
What's the song, Sally? Oh, I know I can't think
of that.

Speaker 1 (08:44):
You know what German songs we play?

Speaker 2 (08:47):
Do you want to do it again? But with a
bit of the rhythm of the song. I know it's cheating,
but let's.

Speaker 3 (08:52):
Do it to it vas zein vomits don sing it's
I lead for.

Speaker 1 (08:57):
Dick von something thing.

Speaker 6 (09:01):
On.

Speaker 1 (09:02):
I'm going to give it away if I say the next.

Speaker 2 (09:04):
Right, We'll see how you go. What is that song?

Speaker 1 (09:08):
Podcast for under the Magnificent seven Rical Assassin.

Speaker 2 (09:11):
Lyrical Assassin. Today's Lyrical Assassin gives Jones your chance to
practice his German.

Speaker 1 (09:19):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, the Germans. Chris is in spring Fast. Hello, Chris,
good morning.

Speaker 2 (09:25):
Hello, put your German listening ears on and Brendan over.

Speaker 3 (09:28):
We don't blame many German songs, Chris, so this should
be fairly easy.

Speaker 1 (09:32):
Ready to go. We're having conversations in chairman.

Speaker 3 (09:36):
Has to add vas Zeit Vermage dancing in lead for
Dick Von ninety nine.

Speaker 2 (09:45):
Do you know the song, Chris?

Speaker 1 (09:48):
Yeah, yeah, looked as he's.

Speaker 3 (09:51):
Saying Germany, I'm not sure what you said.

Speaker 2 (09:59):
Any of that songs are in enjoying yourself. That's all
we might.

Speaker 1 (10:01):
As as Germans say yah yah.

Speaker 2 (10:03):
Google Schaiber that's Penn in German.

Speaker 1 (10:06):
Okay.

Speaker 2 (10:06):
Question number four for you, which of these famous people
was born with the name Reginald Dwight. Was it a
Freddie Mercury b Elton, John c Ozzy Osbourne? It was
o Reginald Kenneth Dwight. True or false?

Speaker 1 (10:20):
Chris.

Speaker 3 (10:21):
Movie trailers were originally shown at the end of movies.
Is this true or false?

Speaker 7 (10:30):
True?

Speaker 1 (10:31):
It is true.

Speaker 2 (10:31):
That's weird.

Speaker 3 (10:32):
In the early days of the cinema, what would happen
in the movie would finish, and people didn't have anywhere
to go, and they put on upcoming features at the
end of the movie.

Speaker 2 (10:41):
So they didn't try to get you up to get
people into the next screening. It's probably one screening a day.

Speaker 1 (10:45):
That was it.

Speaker 3 (10:45):
Now they've got all the ads val Morgan Cinema advertise
and you get all those ads locally owned and operated,
all the ads.

Speaker 2 (10:53):
For Brontie tongue. When we grew up was canned tongue.

Speaker 1 (10:56):
Where would you get Bronti tongue?

Speaker 2 (10:57):
Well no, not just in Bronte the escalators.

Speaker 3 (11:00):
Yeah, yeah, Chris.

Speaker 2 (11:03):
Question number six for you, which pet is it illegal
to own in Queensland unless you're a magician? The magicians
that weird. Rabbits are illegal to own his pets unless
you have a special license for exhibition like magicians act
or educational display. So kids there can't have rabbits. That's weird.

Speaker 3 (11:27):
When now they enforced that you got to display your
your rabbit license.

Speaker 1 (11:31):
Yeah, so excuse me. I'll just pull it out of
my arm, out.

Speaker 2 (11:34):
Of my wrist, out of my arm. That is a trick.

Speaker 3 (11:38):
That is a trick. And then instead a big bouquet
of flowers coming.

Speaker 2 (11:42):
Oh, officer, a giant novelty check with your name on
it has just come out. Question seven, we wrap it
up with you, Chris. Which Spanish pop artist? Actually I
think he's Puerto Rican isn't He announced his tour down
Under yesterday featuring Rita Aura is a big star who was.

Speaker 7 (11:59):
Ricky Margo.

Speaker 1 (12:01):
I went under a big billboard of him just past
the airport.

Speaker 3 (12:05):
Ricky, Ricky, congratulations to you, Chris. You've won the jam
packets all coming away? Did it for two at sale?
Make a restaurant five star Easter dining at sale, make
a restaurant high at Regency Sydney. A foundly past the
Sea Life Sydney Aquarium and Wildlife Sydney Zoo. Explore animal
crossing new horizons at Sea Life Sydney Aquarium.

Speaker 1 (12:25):
You should get down and do a bit of You're
in narration. No you doing that?

Speaker 2 (12:31):
Just look at animals and do documentary narration. So you
do a professional brand and I save it for when
it's needed.

Speaker 3 (12:37):
And the jones you nomatic coach chose fit the color
in some salor pencils.

Speaker 1 (12:40):
Chris, anything you'd like to add to this, No, I
thank you very much, would be very happy.

Speaker 2 (12:46):
Ricky Ricky Martin. Remember you know Miguel Maestre is obsessed
with Ricky Martin to the point where he was in
a hotel one morning and saw Ricky Martin at the
breakfast buffet, and mcguel was sort of wanted to go
up and harass him, but was trying not to. A
woman came up and asked for mcgirl's autograph.

Speaker 1 (13:01):
This is when Miguel had discovered the fame.

Speaker 2 (13:04):
So he maneuvered himself and this woman to have their
photo taken pretty much next to Ricky. So Ricky could go,
who's this enigmatic Spanish speaking man who people want to
have their photographs.

Speaker 1 (13:15):
What happened is.

Speaker 2 (13:18):
Pushed him into the toaster and it was all, excuse.

Speaker 1 (13:20):
Me, amigo, can you leave mister Martin alone?

Speaker 2 (13:24):
He was tasted at the toaster.

Speaker 1 (13:27):
I just said the idea of Ricky Martin at the
breakfast buffet.

Speaker 2 (13:30):
Oh, I guess they have to go to eat.

Speaker 1 (13:31):
Man's got eight and you can't resist the breakfast.

Speaker 2 (13:34):
But it doesn't matter how rich you are. The call
of the buffets ever, the sloppy eggs. I can't deal
with the big slops of eggs. You know when they
do the big No these days they have egg stations
and they say, you know, what would you like?

Speaker 1 (13:46):
There's too much digging around.

Speaker 2 (13:47):
There's a lot of dicking around. In an hour later,
an egg rides at your table, the.

Speaker 1 (13:52):
Chicken laying that thing mate coming up on the show.

Speaker 3 (13:57):
Did you watch the surprisingly Biffo on the jet Start
flight to Bali?

Speaker 1 (14:02):
One would say, when was there not Biffo on a
jet start?

Speaker 2 (14:05):
We want to discussed that. We're going to put Peter
Dutton saying that if he becomes Prime Minister he'll live
at Kurabiley House and not the Lodge. Will put that
to the pub test.

Speaker 3 (14:12):
And if you had a friend that posts social media,
cringe regularly.

Speaker 1 (14:17):
They've got a comedian UK comedian taking the world by storm,
Jake Lamb.

Speaker 2 (14:20):
He's hilarious. I love him.

Speaker 9 (14:22):
Jonesie and Amanda Podcast.

Speaker 1 (14:30):
Great names. I've been in this business for a long time.

Speaker 2 (14:36):
What business is that?

Speaker 3 (14:37):
The business of this the fun factory and I just
ate it's April falls down.

Speaker 1 (14:42):
I just ate a donut and being delivered to us.

Speaker 2 (14:45):
Yeah, and I had his bite as well.

Speaker 1 (14:47):
I was just thinking more you wouldn't.

Speaker 2 (14:48):
Take a because I don't have a sweet tooth. And
we were being filmed and Jenny was filming. I said, okay, okay,
what's going on. You know the caramel in it, it's
mixed with vegemite. Ah, because I don't have much of
a sweet tooth. I kind of a lot.

Speaker 3 (15:02):
I liked it, Yeah, because being April Fools, I munched
into it.

Speaker 1 (15:06):
And whenever breakfast Radio.

Speaker 2 (15:08):
Be more careful today, be more careful.

Speaker 1 (15:11):
Donut Time sent that along.

Speaker 2 (15:14):
Thank you.

Speaker 1 (15:14):
They're legitimate donut people, weren't they.

Speaker 9 (15:17):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (15:18):
No, it came from a local prison, right exactly.

Speaker 3 (15:21):
And I would eat it and be happy, like, well
that's going to give me some sort of tummy trouble.
Then I'm happy for it because it's very yummy. I
dumbing through the drum. How big book of musical facts.

Speaker 2 (15:30):
On this show's giving it a bit of an after
burn from the vego right now now you mention it,
so I keep flicking on this day.

Speaker 3 (15:37):
In nineteen eighty, oh ac DC recorded You Shook Me
All Night Long.

Speaker 1 (15:43):
That is quite extraordinary.

Speaker 3 (15:44):
Bond Scott had only passed away in the February of
nineteen eighty by the April they had recorded what would
go on to be one of the greatest songs that
they'd ever written.

Speaker 2 (15:53):
Two months later, so they already had replaced him with
another lead singer.

Speaker 1 (15:58):
Brian Johnson.

Speaker 2 (15:58):
Yeah, and had obviously they had this song and the works. Yep,
it was going to be a bond Scott's song. Presumable Bangers.

Speaker 3 (16:04):
Young told me himself that Bond Scott actually played drums
on the back in Black album, played drums on You
Shook Me all long.

Speaker 1 (16:12):
He was quite the drummer and they were just.

Speaker 3 (16:14):
Tooling around, you know, and musicians noodle and they said, oh, Bond,
get on the drums. We're just Malcolm and I trying
to work this particular song out. But still extraordinary. You
lose your lead singer, such a charismatic lead singer.

Speaker 2 (16:25):
See, that would be easy to be seen as as in,
you know, insensitive, wouldn't it. These days have a banded
that you'd say too soon.

Speaker 3 (16:34):
The Young Brother's Classwegians, they just move on. They're pretty tough,
tough people. Bond Scot was tough. That's what they do.
Then you look at that song though, it's become one
of their biggest songs. And plenty of other artists have
had a crack, particularly the ladies. Celene Dion and Anastasia
had a crack in two thousand and two.

Speaker 2 (16:55):
Well, they're both big vocal singers.

Speaker 1 (17:02):
Two thousand and four Nights Wayne had a.

Speaker 2 (17:04):
Crack we're pulling faces.

Speaker 1 (17:12):
It's not your I got female James Bond. I think
nothing beats the og.

Speaker 2 (17:21):
Let's do it.

Speaker 3 (17:24):
And there was a story on Pete Daverton's news last night.
Did you see the story the punch on on the
jet Star flights from Melbourne?

Speaker 2 (17:32):
Really distressing story Melbourne.

Speaker 3 (17:34):
Sir Barley, I would say the news bulletin would be
when wasn't there a punch on between.

Speaker 2 (17:40):
A punch on on a plane is a terrible thing.
It's a terrifying thing. You're in a small metal tube.
I've got a friend who's a flight attendant for international
flights and it's terrifying. And she's been working in business
class and you have CEOs and get on the get
on the turps and lose control and what can you do?

(18:01):
It's a terrifying proposition for the people sitting around them. Awful, awful.

Speaker 3 (18:05):
Remember Gerard Depardieux, the French actor, he used the dining
cart as a toilet.

Speaker 2 (18:11):
Well, I think he weed in a bottle, didn't he?
But there was a story of another ceo up in
business class. Apparently there's always a combination of their medication
and a fit of alcohol. And did a Pooh on
the trolley and they had to close down the food service.
And then it's only asked afterwards when you sort of
come out of your torp tour poor and someone says,

(18:31):
you know what you just did? Mate?

Speaker 1 (18:34):
London. This is our PEDI reported the story.

Speaker 10 (18:40):
This is the moment tempers flared on a fly from
Melbourne to Balley. Footage taken by a Jetstar passenger showing
a man lunging over seats to try and attack another traveler,
allegedly over a reclined chair. Quick thinking cabin cruz stepped

(19:03):
in and stopped the brawl. Jetstar has confirmed they are
investigating the incident.

Speaker 2 (19:09):
So what happens? What if your kid is sitting in
a seat to the side or behind? Absolutely terrifying. I'd
be terrified.

Speaker 1 (19:16):
It's a little ig though. I didn't know you could
recline your seats on Jetstar.

Speaker 2 (19:20):
It's a good ad for them, isn't it.

Speaker 1 (19:22):
You can now recline your seat.

Speaker 2 (19:25):
Some conditions aclained.

Speaker 1 (19:26):
Might not get you there, but you can recline your seat.
Gam Nation, let's get on down to the jonesy demand
of arms for the pubtest.

Speaker 3 (19:35):
Peter Dutton, living in Furibilly House, to surpass the pub test.
Peter Dutton said that he would move his fan from
Queensland to the Harborside property in Sydney's North if the
Coalition won government.

Speaker 2 (19:46):
Interesting, isn't it because he would be the first ever
prime minister whose primary whose seat wasn't in Sydney to
live in Kurabilly House. Anthony Abernezi his seat is in
s but he chose to live in Canberra and he
has mocked Peter Dutton because of this. Peter Dutton's move
is consistent with his snubbing of the Canberra bubble, as

(20:07):
he calls it. But a number of people have said
that those that live in Kurrabilly are often viewed as
just being a prime minister for Sydney and not for
the rest of the nation. It's so John Howard started
this and then Tony Abbott, Scott Morrison, but all three
represented electorates in Sydney.

Speaker 3 (20:23):
Because Hawky he lived in the lodge, so did Paul Keating.

Speaker 1 (20:27):
Yeah, GoF whitl them all those people And.

Speaker 2 (20:30):
Often I've said they've got young children and so they
wanted to be consistent with their schooling. But Peter Dutton
is from Queensland. So it's interesting this is what the
Prime minister has said. He said, of course when Peter
Dutt said he likes the harbor, he said, well, of
course he likes the harbor. Everyone likes the harbor. But
your job is to be close to where the Department
of Prime Minister and Cabinet is, where meetings happen almost

(20:51):
every day.

Speaker 1 (20:51):
It's abou Kirabilly house.

Speaker 3 (20:53):
I've spent a bit of time floating around out the
front of it when we go sailing on the weekend
and the pipe tips are over out the front there.

Speaker 2 (21:00):
So this is when you when you work for the
French secret Service.

Speaker 3 (21:03):
He just floating around and I thought it's not very
much of a usable waterfront as far as like you know,
Peter Dutton won't be able to put his Quinn tracks
out the front on a floating dock?

Speaker 2 (21:12):
Would you rather that? All living in Canberra in the
winter and.

Speaker 1 (21:15):
Think, I think I'd go with the curability.

Speaker 2 (21:17):
But what are the signals that it scents interesting that
one of the big platforms Peter Dutton was riding on
and he's pulled back from a little bit, is saying
he wants everyone to stop working from home. Whose home
is he working from? And so all the public servants
in Canberra are being told get back into the office.
He's not going to be in that office. He's going
to be in Sydney.

Speaker 3 (21:33):
And the reason they live in the lodge because they're
close to Parliament House.

Speaker 1 (21:37):
That's why you're there.

Speaker 2 (21:38):
That's why you're there. How do you feel about this
if he's elected, Peter Dutton living in Kurabilly House and
not the lodge? Is this past the pub test?

Speaker 6 (21:45):
Yeah? Jam Na said, when God I wanted to get
right now, windows head on a jel.

Speaker 3 (22:00):
Down to the Jonty the better arms to the pub
test today, Peter Dutton living in Kierbilly House, does it
pass the pub test?

Speaker 2 (22:06):
He said, if he wins the election, he will move there.

Speaker 1 (22:08):
He would be the first ass not like he came
out and just said it. Someone asked him, so where
if you won the election, where would you live? And
he's probably cure a billy. Yeah, but it wasn't like
trumpeted that out.

Speaker 2 (22:18):
But having said that, he is on the election trail
and your words are your words. Interestingly, he would be
the first ever prime minister to do so who doesn't
have a Sydney electorate. John Howard, Tony Abbert, Scott Morrison
all represented electorates in Sydney. Anthony Albernezi represents an electorate
in Cydney. Better he's gone to the Lodge because.

Speaker 3 (22:37):
It is joining Mark Villy could have lived in lived
the Vida Luca at Currabilly Well.

Speaker 2 (22:42):
He has said here the job is to be close
to where the Department of Prime Minister and Cabinet is,
where meetings happen almost every day. Interestingly, Peter Dutton is
the one who's asking for people to come back into
the office. He wanted that to be one of his platforms,
is it. I think he's walked back a bit on
that because a lot of women were outraged about I
don't want you to work from home anymore. Ironically, he's
not working from his office. No, you'll be going to

(23:03):
his new hoping no brother, but his office. Yes, well
he should be working and he's asking all the bureaucrats
to go back to work in Canberra, but he won't
be there.

Speaker 1 (23:11):
Do as I say, not as I do, Peter.

Speaker 2 (23:13):
So if he wins the election, Peter Dunt living in
Kurbilly House, does it pass the pub test?

Speaker 6 (23:18):
Oh, definitely not.

Speaker 7 (23:18):
I think if he's going to have the roles, he
should live in Canberra. I've got to do the role
and do it properly.

Speaker 11 (23:23):
Yeah, why not.

Speaker 7 (23:24):
We've got Vivid, We've got New Year's Eve, the best
New Year's Eve fireworks, and not a place for him
to entertain there.

Speaker 6 (23:29):
I'd leave there.

Speaker 2 (23:30):
Should live down in Camera I can probably be nice
and I'm living in the middle of the city, not
going there anything worse.

Speaker 6 (23:35):
I don't mind that he lives there, but don't expect
the people of Australia to pick up the air page
back and forth on camera.

Speaker 7 (23:42):
Well, I want to live there too, have you seen that.

Speaker 6 (23:45):
I'll vote for him if you'll invite me over the capital.

Speaker 7 (23:52):
For sure.

Speaker 6 (23:53):
That is the first view.

Speaker 7 (23:55):
It Shouldney beside Jonesy and Amanda Studio.

Speaker 1 (23:59):
That's true, and we've got Vivid.

Speaker 2 (24:01):
You know what we should do? Maybe if you and
I became joint prime ministers. We've got the office space
and the view already, right, we just have to be
get some policies going.

Speaker 1 (24:10):
So what's your platform. I don't don't have climate change.

Speaker 2 (24:13):
It's only good ships. I'm sure it's just stuff and
stuff and stuff. Yeah, things.

Speaker 3 (24:16):
In fact, we're probably better than the eggs et cetera.
Dopes that run this country.

Speaker 1 (24:22):
Shah Notion podcast, Cold but I want seven.

Speaker 3 (24:25):
Hello there, it's Jonesy demanded text Tom Joe Holmes.

Speaker 1 (24:28):
It's Tuesday, the first of April. Remember the good old
days when we do the.

Speaker 2 (24:31):
April fools don't have?

Speaker 1 (24:33):
And then COVID came along and we.

Speaker 2 (24:35):
People are suffering us too hard, too hard, and it's
awful and I my sphincter clenchers. It's a country song.
Every time there's any practical joke involved, you know, I
just want to blab it's a joke.

Speaker 1 (24:49):
It's a joke.

Speaker 3 (24:50):
But also when you look at it, social media has
wrecked the April fool's joke. In the old days, you
could say, oh that Dick Smith's putting a jumbo under
the Harbor Bridge and the suckers of the seventies four
for that, Yeah, and it'd be just a giant elephant
on a pond.

Speaker 2 (25:03):
Tune, which is pretty impressive.

Speaker 1 (25:05):
Yeah, But we just don't have the budget for that
stuff anymore. No, No, you can't do anything anymore.

Speaker 2 (25:10):
We put a big pen under the bridge. It's incredible
that there's no pun involved.

Speaker 1 (25:15):
It was just that.

Speaker 3 (25:16):
But some of the good stuff that comes out of
social media, though, is Jake Lamb.

Speaker 2 (25:19):
Well, this is an English guy. He's coming to Australia.
He's so funny. He's blown up online. Seriously, he has
his five hundred million views and his stuff is just
all the stuff we all observe. Many of us have
friends who are posting too much when they go on
their holidays.

Speaker 5 (25:38):
Did you see I've posted a photo at the airport
of my passport, next to the tickets and the drink,
so that everyone knew I was going on holiday.

Speaker 1 (25:44):
Yeah? Good, isn't this.

Speaker 5 (25:47):
I've just taken a picture of the view. I'm going
to post it and write this week's office. I just
took a picture of the sea. I'm going to post
it and write getting some Vitamin C way to sea. Oh,
I've just seen you posted that photo of your legs
and hot dogs or legs brilliant. I've just posted a
photo from our holiday and I've written take me back.

Speaker 1 (26:08):
Oh so cringey, it's the whole gamut.

Speaker 10 (26:10):
Hi.

Speaker 1 (26:10):
Yeah, looking forward to catching up.

Speaker 3 (26:12):
To with Jake Kees joining us next jams.

Speaker 2 (26:15):
Well, I just love our next guest. His name is
Jake Lamb but he's a UK comedian who I've been
following for ages on socials. His online videos have wracked
up over five hundred million views, so he's absolutely the
one to watch. And he's doing a national tour of
Australia very shortly. He's on the way, Jake Lamber, Hi, here.

Speaker 1 (26:32):
Is one to welcome Hello.

Speaker 2 (26:34):
Hello. It seems that you your eye catches all the
small awkwardness of life. Is this how you spend your
day walking around looking at how irritating waiters can be,
looking at pet owners? Stuff catches your eye over that?

Speaker 5 (26:50):
Yeah, and now Instagram has given me a way to
sort of channel that and let everyone else. Luckily, I've
realized that everyone else has the same annoyances that I do.
I seem to have become the voice of the cringe. Yeah,
although that makes it sound like I'm the cringey one,
I'm pulled enough a mirror to society.

Speaker 1 (27:09):
You know what else I've noticed about Instagram?

Speaker 3 (27:11):
Now they're doing the newest thing is and you probably
notice this. Now they're saying Instagram reality versus Instagram or
Instagram versus reality.

Speaker 1 (27:20):
There seems to be a pleasure of these Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 5 (27:23):
So I've realized now that if you post a clip
or like a real people even like the outtakes, like
I did one before about my cat, and then in
some of the clips I was trying, I was pretending
to be my cat, and then my cat walked into
shop and you could just tell the way he was
looking at me. He was fully aware of what was
going on. See people like it if you post that
as well. I don't like stuff too polished anymore. You

(27:43):
used to have to be the whole thing with all
the filters on Instagram. Now they want you raw, which
is what they can have in Australia, in Sydney, Brisbane,
Perth and Melbourne.

Speaker 6 (27:54):
Raw.

Speaker 1 (27:55):
You should plug your show.

Speaker 2 (27:59):
I know it was Mother's Day in England, not in Australia,
but in England just over the weekend, and you've got
some nice observations about how everyone gushes about mum.

Speaker 5 (28:09):
Yeah, I didn't realize it wasn't there as well. I
only realized yesterday that it's not all around the world.

Speaker 4 (28:14):
I didn't know this.

Speaker 5 (28:16):
I mean, I'm sure you have your own one your
mother's now.

Speaker 2 (28:21):
Ours is in May or September May, I think, Yeah,
me and May. But you should know this.

Speaker 1 (28:29):
You get a flurry of course from your kids that
Mother's Day.

Speaker 2 (28:32):
Some stage, but that whole thing of we gush about
our mom's dads don't give a rats.

Speaker 1 (28:37):
Really yeah, that's it.

Speaker 5 (28:39):
So the video was basically it was the impression of
the mum receiving her card, which is to mom, you're
the best in the world. Thanks for everything. I love
you so much. Then it jumps to the dad opening
his Father's Day card and it's two dad, Happy Father's Day.
Oh I forgot to sign it, which is I think
what we all do, it's just but then we all

(29:00):
get it's it's.

Speaker 4 (29:01):
Only a good reflection of what we get from our dads.

Speaker 5 (29:04):
Th about the years are more gushy and then the
dads you're lucky.

Speaker 1 (29:09):
Really all you'll.

Speaker 4 (29:09):
Get is you'll text them and get a thumbs up emoji.

Speaker 1 (29:12):
That's so dead.

Speaker 5 (29:13):
Is the same in Australia that so much I'm a
dead if you can ever get just yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3 (29:18):
I'm a dad of three kids and that's all I want,
or you want, is just no hassles. You just want
to be left alone. You don't want to have to
give out money to someone that's pretty much it.

Speaker 4 (29:27):
Yeah, so oh okay, right, that's your bar for being
a father.

Speaker 1 (29:30):
Yeah, a lot to judge you. I'm not on the
show to judge.

Speaker 3 (29:33):
You, but I judge that's pretty and I take no
umbridge to that.

Speaker 2 (29:38):
I also like the one you did about the dogs
that people make incredible excuses when people get humped by
other people's dogs.

Speaker 5 (29:46):
Oh yeah, it was when you go to someone's house
and they have a dog, which is you know that
they've spent a lot of time training this dog, and
it seems that as soon as someone comes into the house,
dogs just forget all.

Speaker 1 (29:58):
The walls and they just do whatever they want.

Speaker 5 (30:00):
And then the owner has to be quite embarrassed by this.
But it seems that when it's the humping one, they
find it funny that you've got a dog on your
Let us not go into too much details, of course,
Morning Radio, but.

Speaker 3 (30:11):
We understand how it works. You you you're an epileptic.
You discovered this. You were in top Shop buying a
set of jeans and then all of a sudden you
had an epileptic feed.

Speaker 1 (30:20):
Tell us about that, Yeah, it was. It was exactly that.

Speaker 5 (30:23):
I was at university, went out, had the seizure, had
no idea, woke up in top shop and then all
I remember is waking up and it was my first
ever seizure, and a lady just said, do you know
what day it is? But I didn't know that was
a thing people do when people were like passed out.
So I was just like, can you ask someone else?

(30:43):
I'm dealing with a bit here.

Speaker 4 (30:46):
I just popped into the shop.

Speaker 1 (30:52):
On the floor.

Speaker 4 (30:53):
He's the one.

Speaker 3 (30:56):
Well, Jag, it's great to meet you and we're looking
forward to seeing you.

Speaker 1 (30:59):
You should plug your show. He's all over the country.
It's all over the for tickets and information. You're going
to come, of course, you'll.

Speaker 2 (31:06):
Come absolutely if you want.

Speaker 3 (31:08):
If you want to follow Amanda, you'll get some cringe
worthy posts.

Speaker 2 (31:11):
Not true. I don't post that stuff he's making.

Speaker 1 (31:13):
He's making that follow.

Speaker 4 (31:15):
I just know I've seen it so much.

Speaker 1 (31:18):
Legs me.

Speaker 4 (31:21):
What on offer?

Speaker 3 (31:23):
You can get all your info from Jake Lambert Comedy
dot com.

Speaker 1 (31:27):
Dona you, Jake Lamber, thank you for joining us. Oh
this has been so nice.

Speaker 4 (31:30):
Thank you very much.

Speaker 5 (31:31):
It's Sunday night here, so I'm going to go and
watch It's not it's Monday night.

Speaker 4 (31:37):
Sorry, what day. Is it that Tuesday morning.

Speaker 1 (31:39):
You're asking us you're not having you should know? Thank you?
Carry on about your business.

Speaker 9 (31:48):
Mate Jonesy and Amanda podcast.

Speaker 1 (31:57):
Amanda could for anyone but yourselfie Giant.

Speaker 2 (32:03):
It'd be interesting seeing the fallout from the highly classified
military information that was shared on a public service. Really
on signal. It's supposedly encrypted, but this is the American
political system. There are a whole lot of secret ways
you're supposed to share that information. And weirdly it was
shared with a journalist, so we saw all the close

(32:24):
ups of the bombing emojis and the thumbs up and there.

Speaker 3 (32:26):
Yeah, quite extraordinary just to have morse code in the
old day.

Speaker 2 (32:30):
Well, and apparently what you're supposed to do if you're
using signal in the political system there, you're supposed to say, hey,
I've got important things to tell you. Go into a
secure area and I'll send it to you. But this
was just used willly nearly like that. There's been a
lot of commentary around it, but this I saw this
the other day and I just loved it. Here's someone
saying emails just aren't safe. We should hide state secrets.

(32:54):
Deep in the story, parts of recipe blogs. This is
a giant coolie of mine. All you want is the recipe,
but they're determined to tell you a story. They'll start
with here's a great lemon cake recipe, and then it
goes to when I first traveled to the Himalayas and
I first found my grandmother's diary in the Cotswoltz. I'm

(33:15):
going to kick him in the Cotswoaltz. Just give me
the recipe. Love a giant gooley of mine. If you
have a gooolie that you would like to share with us,
our favorite goolie of the year gets twenty thousand dollars.
Say you can do it. You download the iHeartRadio app,
You go to Gold one on one seven, press the microphone,
record your ghoolie and you could be twenty thousand dollars

(33:36):
richer just for being irritated.

Speaker 1 (33:38):
Go to it. Jamation and I saw.

Speaker 2 (33:41):
Something amazing yesterday. An American guy was talking about this.
In nineteen eighty nine, McDonald's had a promotion with a
happy meal. So nineteen eighty nine, that's thirty six, thirty
six years ago, no, how many years ago.

Speaker 1 (33:54):
Nine was last week.

Speaker 2 (33:56):
It's a long time ago. So instead of giving out
the yeah, instead of giving out plastic toys and things
with a macappy meal. This was kind of the opposite.
For just two days to celebrate Earth Day. For two
days in nineteen eighty nine, when you bought a happy meal,
you could ask for a free tree, just some seeds
and little kid friendly instructions on how to plant them.

(34:19):
And so then the other day a guy was saying,
after fifty years, my family is selling the family home.
My childhood home is up for sale, and he took
a photo of himself standing in front of the tree
that he had got the seeds for in nineteen eighty nine.
Have a look at that. Look how big that tree is.
That's him at the base there say Christmas tree, much bigger.

(34:41):
It's like the size of a Christmas tree. It have
in Martin place the size of a Christmas tree. It
having a town square, this massive tree, and it's encourage
a whole lot of other people to share the trees
that they grew when they were kids. These are massive,
massive trees, and what an incredible thing. So only in
those two days pact that that had not only for

(35:01):
kids to see something incredible grow, but instead of giving
landfill it's the opposite of landfill. You're planting something that's
good for the universe. So it would be a great
thing for McDonald's to bring back with a happy meal.
Give seeds, give plant seeds, give tree seeds, so everyone's
a winner. We're not just getting plastic crab.

Speaker 1 (35:22):
At least give them to the Amazon so they can reforest.

Speaker 2 (35:26):
I remember I did it beyond two thousand story. I
won a United Nations Peace Prime because of that. Thank
you for bringing it up. I don't get to talk
about it well.

Speaker 1 (35:33):
The fact that you wear it around your neck every
The story.

Speaker 2 (35:36):
And it's a citation, was that because the land had
been cleared to raise cattle to make beef for McDonald's
and hamburgers, etc. They had cleared the lungs of the earth,
which is the Amazon. And because there was no small
there were no birds around, there were no small mice,
there was nothing to take seeds anywhere. That's how you
propagate a place. There were PhD scientists who were physically

(35:58):
planting seeds and those areas are largely regrown now or else.
There's big, bigger rules around what you can clear and
what you can't. But it all starts with the seeds.
It really does. Thank you.

Speaker 3 (36:11):
Wasn't that where you got dumped on the beach in
your one piece and you're trying to be away from
the crew.

Speaker 2 (36:16):
The crew to see me in my coze. That was
when we went to the RIO conference. I didn't want to.

Speaker 1 (36:20):
Did you get an award there?

Speaker 2 (36:20):
I didn't want to.

Speaker 1 (36:21):
Oh, that was just most sand in Gusset.

Speaker 2 (36:23):
I didn't want the crew to see me in my cozy,
so I thought I'll go a bit further up the
most dangerous beach in the world. I got caught in
a giant dumper, and I thought, I just try to
look casual. So I exited the water, and my gusset
had swelled up to the size of a seven four seven,
and I didn't want to go back in. So that's
how I had to return to the hotel. I'm still
getting rid of the bits.

Speaker 1 (36:44):
Your virtue was pretty safe that night.

Speaker 2 (36:49):
No, I did not get a citation for that bank.

Speaker 1 (36:52):
You most sand in Gusset?

Speaker 2 (36:56):
Can I tell you who nappies swing out?

Speaker 6 (36:58):
Why?

Speaker 2 (37:00):
Certainly the water goes in? Why do I tell you anything?

Speaker 1 (37:05):
Podcast? I thought maybe married at first sight might be ending.
As far as my interest in the show has certainly waned.

Speaker 3 (37:13):
I do lean into it every now and then because
there's great stories that come up. But then I noticed
they're advertising for new couples to go on the show
for next year.

Speaker 2 (37:21):
Isn't it funny? Everyone says the editing didn't go my
way and I was exploited, But hey, hold and new
people will give it a go next time.

Speaker 1 (37:27):
Ten thousand people auditioned for that.

Speaker 2 (37:29):
Yeah, and people get bullied every year and think I'll
be I'll be stronger than that.

Speaker 3 (37:33):
I married at first last night Paul and Karina Paul
were they so?

Speaker 1 (37:37):
Paul is the French guy.

Speaker 3 (37:38):
He's the one who chose to go on a date
to satisfy his curiosity. Karna is lovely. I think she's
a fantastic woman anyway, Paul. At the end, they.

Speaker 1 (37:48):
Try to decided to put this task where everything's going peachy.

Speaker 3 (37:52):
We are going to give you the opportunity to go
with someone that you could have been matched.

Speaker 2 (37:56):
With, a person that we would have put up if
we hadn't put you.

Speaker 3 (37:59):
And this is a case of smart marrited first sight
husband versus not so smart married at first side husband. Jeff,
for example, who is also lovely he said this, hmmm, no,
back to the game boy.

Speaker 1 (38:14):
Back to the old game boy.

Speaker 2 (38:15):
Smart fellow right there.

Speaker 3 (38:16):
And curiously, those two well not curiously, not surprisingly, they
are together.

Speaker 1 (38:22):
Paul, on the other hand, said this, So, Paul, what's
it going to be?

Speaker 10 (38:32):
Yeah, yeah, I reckon, Yeah, I'll yeah, I'll go and
meet that person.

Speaker 1 (38:39):
And Karina, she was happy at the time.

Speaker 8 (38:44):
None, I'm actually done, get your ship and please, I'm done.

Speaker 1 (38:49):
That went well.

Speaker 2 (38:50):
So he missed out on his Plan B and his
Plan A.

Speaker 3 (38:53):
Yeah, it's all gone. I don't know where what plan
he's up to. So the final hours last night, will
they stay or.

Speaker 1 (39:00):
Will they go?

Speaker 3 (39:01):
I think Karina proved that Hell hath no fury than
I married it first sight, bride scorned.

Speaker 8 (39:07):
No matter how hard I try, I can't look at
you in the same way.

Speaker 2 (39:13):
Oh I was yours and you had.

Speaker 8 (39:16):
Me and you ruined it, and now you're going to
have to live with that for the rest of your life.

Speaker 1 (39:29):
Here I spare you the minute thirty of him going
the blood.

Speaker 2 (39:33):
Oh, he goes the blood down.

Speaker 3 (39:35):
I actually went and made a cup of tea, came
back and he's still going the blood. He went the
blood longer than Jared Jared there he.

Speaker 2 (39:44):
Was walking down the beach.

Speaker 1 (39:45):
He's still goes with Sophie.

Speaker 3 (39:46):
Mug drop, Poor old Jared, and he went the blood
for Paul went the blood longer.

Speaker 1 (39:53):
There's Jared.

Speaker 2 (39:55):
Is Jared going on kicking coconuts on the beach.

Speaker 1 (40:00):
He's still walking. Bro cameraman got RSI, I can't hold
this shot.

Speaker 2 (40:04):
He's ALcom navigated the wall anyway.

Speaker 1 (40:06):
Paul, at the end of his Blood session said, actually,
come with this is open. You know, I think I
would have liked to hear him just say this.

Speaker 2 (40:21):
Trick girl, I've only had a game.

Speaker 3 (40:24):
Boy instead of himself to play with jams. Amanda Calla
narrates the groundbreaking news series Airborne starts seven point thirty
Wednesday on ten.

Speaker 5 (40:38):
Right Now wants a free money instance, Amanda's I'm looking
forward to that Airborne show.

Speaker 2 (40:47):
It's a great, great show and I put on my
best editor. The footage is the most extraordinary stuff you've
ever men. Welcome to the Narration Club. What's yours?

Speaker 1 (40:55):
I had motorbike cops?

Speaker 6 (40:57):
That is true.

Speaker 2 (40:58):
This mate is blown six hundred on them on his
drinking can. It was similar.

Speaker 1 (41:06):
What's the motorbike cops? The motorbike cops anyway away from that.

Speaker 3 (41:10):
Ten questions sixty seconds on the clock. You could pass
if you don't know an answer. We'll come back to
that question if time permits, you get all the questions right.
One thousand dollars.

Speaker 2 (41:18):
And one thousand dollars to get those questions right. You
can make it two thousand dollars by answering one bonus question,
but it's double or nothing.

Speaker 1 (41:26):
Michelle isn't two woon Bay?

Speaker 2 (41:27):
Hi, Michelle? Oh my gosh, hello, Oh my gosh, it
is you, Michelle. You're ready to go?

Speaker 1 (41:33):
You're a first call up from Woon Bay.

Speaker 6 (41:38):
Yes, it's pretty special there. I'm on my way to work.

Speaker 2 (41:43):
Well, I think you know your hands free, your brain
free or ready to go?

Speaker 7 (41:47):
I don't know my brain's free.

Speaker 10 (41:48):
Now.

Speaker 6 (41:49):
I'm a bit nervous.

Speaker 2 (41:50):
Well, that's good. Make your nerves work for you like
a young jedi. Ten questions sixty seconds. If you're not sure,
say pass. Who is you have time to come back?

Speaker 1 (41:57):
Okay?

Speaker 2 (41:58):
Okay, Michelle, good luck, because here we go. Question number one?
What color is brown? Rice?

Speaker 6 (42:04):
Are brown?

Speaker 2 (42:05):
Question two? What month are we in?

Speaker 6 (42:08):
Mark April?

Speaker 2 (42:10):
Question three? What's snow made of.

Speaker 4 (42:14):
Water?

Speaker 1 (42:15):
Question?

Speaker 2 (42:15):
Four the brand Macona makes what Bobby? Question five true
or false? African elephants are pregnant for twenty two months true.
Question six, which Australian band sings Flame Trees, Cold Chisel?
Question seven in which Australian state would you find the
twelve Apostles Victoria? Question eight in which decade was the

(42:35):
Internet introduced to the public.

Speaker 1 (42:40):
Eighty the nineties.

Speaker 2 (42:44):
Michelle nies, Michelle, you're.

Speaker 1 (42:48):
Doing so well. You had a bit of a wobble there.
I hope we got you were you were quick. You
beat the barsa so that was good.

Speaker 2 (42:55):
But Michelle, Sorry, Michelle, curse.

Speaker 1 (42:58):
It Michelle every morning.

Speaker 2 (43:02):
Oh my gosh, wow, I shall.

Speaker 3 (43:05):
Thank you and you know what tomorrow because now that
you're doing the voiceover for the show, if the money
doesn't go off today as it hadn't, well jackpot tomorrow's
Instagram winnings, so that the temptation question will now be
worth two thousand.

Speaker 2 (43:20):
So you win three thousand dollars if use.

Speaker 1 (43:23):
Michelle as a demonstration. Sorry for doing this to you, Michelle.

Speaker 3 (43:25):
But Michelle, Michelle, if you if you'd stayed on there,
if you'd stayed on there, you would have.

Speaker 1 (43:32):
Had the one thousand dollars.

Speaker 3 (43:33):
But then you go into the bonus you would have
had and you won it, you would have won three
thousand dollars.

Speaker 2 (43:40):
Oh no, yeah, in mind anyway, that's for tomorrow. There'll
be three thousand dollars you for that example, three thousand
dollars on the line for Instagram thanks to Airborne. This
starts Wednesday night on Channel ten Well Done podcast. We
spoke to UK comedian Jake Lambert last hour and he
does zing fabulous stuff on Instagram and all his socials

(44:03):
and it's sort of the people a big chunk of it.
The bit that makes me laugh is when he kind
of mocks the people who go on holidays and post
a thousand pictures leading up to it and afterwards things like, well,
this is my office today, I'm getting some vitamin C
sea you know. Oh I'm back at work, but gee,
my brain's going back to my great time.

Speaker 1 (44:25):
I just had what about this one?

Speaker 5 (44:26):
Oh I've just seen you posted that photo of your
legs and put hot dogs or legs brilliant.

Speaker 2 (44:32):
So cringe, so cringe, And we all know, but I
know we all know Harry hot Dogs. Maybe we are
Harry hot Dogs Batman. Maybe we are those people ourselves,
you know, the people that they announce it getting married
and you go on, no, here we go. It is
going to be a year's worth of socials leading up
to that, the wedding that you still see their photos
for a year and afterwards, remember that beautiful day when

(44:53):
we got married. Stop it, just stop it. Put your
phone down.

Speaker 3 (44:56):
You know what I've noticed Instagram reality, Instagram versus reality.
So it's got this beautiful model standing there on the
beach and then they just got wind in a head. Yeah,
and then they do the reality you just heard with
wind in ahead, and it's it's not like a Celeste
Barber thing. It's a it's a different thing. It's the
person doing it and they're going, I'm not dealing with whatever.

Speaker 2 (45:18):
Or the person that shows you a cooking RECIPI and says, oh,
who's my art takes well, they just knock over some coriander.
You know, well that's not interesting.

Speaker 1 (45:25):
Stop it.

Speaker 2 (45:26):
Just unless your kitchen's burning down.

Speaker 1 (45:28):
Stop it. Good point the tribal dramas beating for you.

Speaker 2 (45:33):
Sorry, look this social media cringe or as I like
to say, put your phone down, Carol. That's enough.

Speaker 5 (45:38):
Oh I've just seen you posted that photo of your
legs and put hot dogs or legs brilliant.

Speaker 2 (45:43):
Yes, there's always someone maybe you're dubbing yourself in. Someone
who photographs all their coffee, someone who photographs every day
of the kid's life.

Speaker 1 (45:50):
What have you got for it? Maybe some unnecessary belfies
from someone?

Speaker 2 (45:53):
What's a belfy?

Speaker 1 (45:55):
As if you don't know?

Speaker 2 (45:56):
How do you do a bum selfie?

Speaker 1 (45:58):
What about those first track?

Speaker 2 (46:00):
How do you take a photo of your own bum?

Speaker 6 (46:02):
You?

Speaker 1 (46:02):
Of course you know how to do that?

Speaker 6 (46:03):
Do I? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (46:05):
Have I am? I give us a call the.

Speaker 1 (46:10):
Tribal drama's betting.

Speaker 3 (46:11):
I like to call it smc the hot dogs or
legs brilliant or social media cringe you like to call it.

Speaker 2 (46:19):
Put your phone down, Carol, that's enough. When everyone got telephones,
we thought we're all be in communication with each other. No,
what is photographing every single minute of our day and
putting daggy captions?

Speaker 3 (46:29):
I remember during COVID, I was on a plane, hadn't
been on a plane for some time, and I did
take a picture of myself on the plane, and I
have great regret about it.

Speaker 2 (46:37):
See our generation finds you know you think, have you
no pride. But most people, even people who are our
age group, have pushed through that and will sit poolside
and just keep looking at photos of themselves until I
get a good one. They're not embarrassed to talk to
their own hand as they're walking down the street.

Speaker 1 (46:51):
Yeah, that's everyone's camera.

Speaker 2 (46:53):
Ready, now, everyone's camera.

Speaker 3 (46:54):
I find if I go on holidays, I can't poste
any pictures of it because I don't.

Speaker 1 (46:57):
Want Johnny Robber coming around in me house going through stuff.

Speaker 2 (47:00):
Oh okay, thought it was just because you didn't look
good in the cozy?

Speaker 1 (47:03):
There is that Wendy has joined us.

Speaker 2 (47:05):
Wendy, goodnighting guys?

Speaker 6 (47:08):
Are my one is hacked?

Speaker 2 (47:09):
I hate seeing hacks.

Speaker 7 (47:11):
One the other day a woman literally got a kiddie's
pool out of the box. I thought it was water
and put it next to a caravan and it was
called a hack. It was what it was intended for.

Speaker 1 (47:21):
Oh, yes, that's not a hack.

Speaker 2 (47:23):
Stuff, that's that's How can that be a hack?

Speaker 7 (47:26):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (47:27):
And you get those convoluted ones where someone gets a
milkshake and.

Speaker 1 (47:30):
Throws it all through their car And how's that a hack?
I don't know. Then I lose interest because a short
attention so.

Speaker 2 (47:35):
It's using just a product as it's intended and pulling
it a hack. Absolutely good, Well, thank you.

Speaker 1 (47:41):
Well Spotted Brad has joined us hy Brad Boddy. Mine's
about my mate's wife.

Speaker 2 (47:48):
She found Facebook and now she's on it every day.

Speaker 7 (47:51):
She'll take a picture of herself having.

Speaker 1 (47:52):
A coffee, says my coffee face, sitting in line to
pick up the kids.

Speaker 7 (47:56):
My kids pick up the kid's face and they're all
the same face.

Speaker 2 (47:58):
But the worst thing, the worst thing is she does
his daggy dance.

Speaker 9 (48:02):
In the bedroom and she's out of time.

Speaker 10 (48:04):
She's mouthing the words but she doesn't know the songs
and it's just like so cringe and I said, on something.

Speaker 1 (48:11):
Now let her go, let it go, just let her
do it. It's not my mate, the scamp, you know,
the scam.

Speaker 3 (48:17):
Missus scamp has always taken pictures of him and he
just doesn't look happy with it.

Speaker 2 (48:22):
Well, I've seen some of the pictures and I can
see what he's like. I'm pulling a face.

Speaker 1 (48:26):
It's like a silver bag for religious in the game.

Speaker 2 (48:28):
Man holding a beer with a T shirt going, come on.

Speaker 1 (48:31):
I one moment, there's one moment.

Speaker 9 (48:34):
Take more of your calls Jonesy and Amanda Podcast.

Speaker 2 (48:41):
Brendon and Elevanda and you're on the same show.

Speaker 1 (48:45):
Let's start wearing lipst so perfect.

Speaker 3 (48:48):
The travel Run has been beating social media cringe or
s MC I like to call it the hot.

Speaker 1 (48:55):
Dogs or legs brilliant or.

Speaker 2 (48:58):
As I like to call it, which your phone down, Carol,
that's enough. There are some people who were just flooding
our feeds with stuff that gives me the ear. It's yeah, youah,
the one I've seen a lot of lately with people
who I don't know, So why am I watching it?
People who say, here's my five best books of the year,
and they hold them up so you can't see the covers,
and they wait and wait and wait so that they

(49:20):
just there's more time, and the last minute they showed
them to it, and you go, oh, why did I bother?

Speaker 12 (49:25):
Well?

Speaker 2 (49:25):
Why did I bother? I don't know who you are,
and I don't care, and I know he's taking away
from my own reading time, and I.

Speaker 1 (49:31):
Know he gets the ham at the end green or otherwise.
Rebecca has joined us.

Speaker 2 (49:36):
Oh Rebecca, Hi, how are you going? Who's the cringe?

Speaker 7 (49:41):
People who have a Facebook account for their pet.

Speaker 2 (49:45):
Oh, and they talk in the first voice of the pet.

Speaker 6 (49:48):
No, they just have an account for their pet.

Speaker 7 (49:51):
And then they're like like things from their own pets
or was like, they have two accounts, what one is
for their pet?

Speaker 3 (49:57):
So I Rove posts a picture of him with a bone,
and then rovers owner goes, good boy, it's crazy.

Speaker 2 (50:05):
Yeah, and they have over talking about my human.

Speaker 1 (50:09):
Next to my human.

Speaker 2 (50:11):
People are eating? No people, what do they do that for?
When they eat?

Speaker 1 (50:15):
When someone's eating? And get me started.

Speaker 2 (50:20):
The ones? I thought, come on, he's he's a professional
tennis player. I don't care. Why am I watch?

Speaker 1 (50:30):
Why thig you rebggar?

Speaker 2 (50:32):
Maddie is joined, Hello Maddie, who's the cringe?

Speaker 6 (50:35):
Good morning. It's people that use Instagram as a baby book,
and we have to have every single update that their
child has done. Like, here's a photo of my child
is a week old. Today, here's a photo it's two
weeks old. They look the same, your kid looks like
a potato in every picture. And then and then once
they start toilet training, they share all the intimate detail
of their child glids the toilet and it's like, can
we just have baby books and you just keep it private?

(50:56):
And show them on their sixteenth perth day.

Speaker 2 (50:59):
And as the child gets they have they have to,
you know, to deal with it. They've got to deal
with being public personas they're.

Speaker 3 (51:04):
Saying, AI could be profiling your child's face as bottom
as it shapes into adulthood. Maddie, just away from that,
you went viral on our particular show with your life.
We were talking about I can't remember how we got
to it, but your mother, you Maddie from Nepaul, moved
into you into your house to look after the twins.

Speaker 1 (51:26):
Subsequently, you split up with your husband COVID.

Speaker 2 (51:29):
Hit so was she stayed but your husband moved out
and got another woman pregnant. She's still there, that is me.

Speaker 6 (51:35):
She is still with me. She actually didn't take very
kindly to speaking seeing the videos on your socials, but
she there was really a lot of really helpful comments.
So a few people suggested that my ex's new girlfriend
might need help with the baby. So she's thinking along
those lines, he might go and go and help with
them with the new baby. So I mean, I'm not

(51:56):
I'm not crossing my fingers, but.

Speaker 1 (51:59):
So there's a resolution of sourts.

Speaker 2 (52:01):
Yes, I hope you didn't make things under ye if
it resolves, and that's been mad.

Speaker 6 (52:07):
I think that she likes seeing it from other people's
point of view as well, like it was a good
reality check for her that what she's doing isn't normal.

Speaker 1 (52:13):
Yes, I think at the time I'd heard a lot
of people in pickles, but that was quite the pickle.

Speaker 6 (52:17):
And I'll tell you what, well, you know what they
say about pickles. They say that pickles are delicious until
you're in one, Oh, Maddie.

Speaker 2 (52:25):
And also because you're last Cora on it, Yes, you're
excuse me, you're our you're getting out east to show
pack tickets to the Easter show our Easter show bag
and also tickets to the Dodge Ams.

Speaker 1 (52:40):
We're not using you in any way for content.

Speaker 6 (52:42):
By the way, that is amazing. Thank you so much.
We'll have a really good day out, Maddie.

Speaker 1 (52:47):
Thank you. Take the whole plan. Can you film it?
When all this ends, I'll look forward to never watching
a news bulletin again, because it's just.

Speaker 2 (53:02):
The news is hard lately, you know, I've been watching
the news and that some of the stories you think,
Oh yes, And I used to feel I needed to
bear witness to other people's pain. But human brains aren't
designed for that. We are designed on some level to
look after our own tribe and to open yourself up
to the world of pain. We're not designed to cope
with it. It's hard, so I'm much more judicious now

(53:24):
about turning the TV off when it's too hard.

Speaker 3 (53:26):
And the news was softer a long time ago. I
think it changed with COVID. It became a Channel nine
to do this a bit. They say alert, so before
it used to just be like breaking news, but now
it's alert.

Speaker 1 (53:38):
But now it's constantly alert, so you're always hyper vigilant.

Speaker 2 (53:43):
And I think social media does that too, and that
if a child was stolen from a car park in Peru,
we would never know about it. Now that's on our
news and we're anxious that, Wow, that could happen to me.
Remember when Lee Sales came in and we're talking to
her about this, and she said, well, that's why it's
called news. Remember that those things are unusual, they're not

(54:05):
everyday things. But we have taken it on board as
if we're in a heightened state of danger, and particularly now.

Speaker 3 (54:11):
In the world of algorithms and things like that, you
can be in a silo with like minded people, just
having or an echo chamber of the same thoughts going
around with like minded people.

Speaker 1 (54:22):
That doesn't mean that there's not good news. What have
you news?

Speaker 2 (54:25):
You tell me what the good news.

Speaker 1 (54:27):
This was a good news story last night.

Speaker 10 (54:29):
It is the seagull that brought part of Sydney to
a standstill fire and rescue calling in the big guns
to rescue the bird, caught up in fishing line and
stuck outside town Hall Wolworth in the CBD. The seagull
eventually rescued to the delight of the dozens of on
lookers who gathered near by.

Speaker 1 (54:54):
Right down on the inflection.

Speaker 3 (54:55):
But isn't it strange with the seagull because someone wants
described them as pretty much a rap with wings.

Speaker 2 (55:00):
Well that's step up from a pigeon.

Speaker 3 (55:02):
But the whole town grinds to a halt saving the seagull.
And then if you go out to Opera b there's
a dog that they've hired to munch the seagulls.

Speaker 1 (55:14):
This is the world we live in. Imagine that little.

Speaker 3 (55:16):
Seagull gets out of the I'm glad, I'm out of
that goes have opera munch.

Speaker 2 (55:21):
Do you want me or not?

Speaker 1 (55:22):
Welcome to the.

Speaker 2 (55:24):
Next message.

Speaker 1 (55:26):
Sham Notion Podcast.

Speaker 2 (55:36):
Twenty thousand dollars. Think about that for our favorite gooolie
of the year. You don't have to be an old
coot going. I don't like it when the neighbor's lawn
isn't mine. That could be a gholie. But we except
all kinds of ghoulies. What have we got today? I
reverse park. I leave enough space to get my boot open.

Speaker 11 (55:53):
I leave emergency space in front of my car in
case I have to roll forward to get my boot open.
Someone's parked, fire up my butt in my parking spot.
They're in my spot. They're front wheels are in my spot.

Speaker 2 (56:08):
She's showing off? Does she says? She reversed park? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (56:12):
Whenever I ring you, you're always in the middle of
a reverse part and it's just.

Speaker 6 (56:20):
Go round.

Speaker 2 (56:20):
I can't I can't talk while I'm reversing. Yeah, but
I can't do it.

Speaker 1 (56:25):
It's this uncanny skill. Whatever I ring you, you're in
the middle of a reverse park can.

Speaker 2 (56:28):
Write it fast? Stuffed it up?

Speaker 6 (56:30):
I stuffed it up.

Speaker 1 (56:31):
I'll go round. Switch that siren off.

Speaker 2 (56:38):
I've been chased by mister whippy I don't know what
else do we have.

Speaker 12 (56:41):
You finally get yourself into that comfy position in bed
after tossing and turning for hours, and you hear that
soft buzzing of a mosquito above your head.

Speaker 2 (56:52):
Get your proboscus off me.

Speaker 12 (56:54):
I'm not a succulent Chinese meal.

Speaker 2 (56:58):
Why are you doing this to me? Dany invade my slumber.
I just want to see you.

Speaker 1 (57:04):
It's not a forum just to keep you.

Speaker 2 (57:06):
Actually, it is as is compared that is a forum.
It is absolutely that forum.

Speaker 1 (57:10):
And you can do that by downloading the iHeartRadio app.
Goes to gold one a one point seven press.

Speaker 3 (57:15):
The microphone records you, Ghoulie twenty thousand dollars riding on this.

Speaker 1 (57:19):
It's six to nine on gold.

Speaker 2 (57:22):
A favorite chlorium ol. Facebook friend wins overnight accommodation for
two at a signature de luxe room, including sparkling wine
at the Beautiful Grace Hotel in the heart of the CBD.

Speaker 1 (57:32):
So good. You get the jonesy amount of tetel and
keyring as well.

Speaker 2 (57:35):
We spoke with comedian Jake Lambert this morning. I love him.
He's an English guy who he reacts to annoying social
media captions that most people post online. It's one of
the things he does. I really love it. And so
today the tribal dron was bidding four social media cringe
the hot dogs or legs brilliant or as I like
to put it, put your phone down, Carol, that's enough.

(57:58):
We had Wendy from Eagle Veil. She calls with her cringe,
which was people sharing so called hacks.

Speaker 7 (58:04):
One the other day a woman literally got a kiddy's
throw out of the box. I filled it with water
and put an extra a caravan and it was called
a hack. It was what it was intended for.

Speaker 1 (58:14):
That's not a hack. That's not a hack unless you
fill in with beer, right au.

Speaker 2 (58:18):
Two, that's enough. One on one seven's famous five continues
with Rob Duckworth, bon Jovi, Madonna, Robbie Williams, John Farnamon,
Pink We pay when they play.

Speaker 1 (58:28):
Was that your April Fools jack? You took the gold
out of the one on one seven? Okay, it wasn't
It was a thing, No, I thought it was.

Speaker 10 (58:35):
No.

Speaker 2 (58:35):
You know, I'm no fan of April Fool's Day. I
did eat a doughnut before that. Had Vega might put
into the custard, and I didn't mind it. If the
joke was to be horrible, it was quite nice.

Speaker 1 (58:46):
Okay, we'll be back from six tonight for jam Nation.

Speaker 2 (58:49):
Did you taste the spit in your coffee? We'll see
you at six.

Speaker 1 (58:52):
Good jed you well, thank god, that's over.

Speaker 6 (58:55):
Good bite, good bite wipe from your own.

Speaker 9 (59:00):
Catch Jonesy and Amanda's podcast on the iHeartRadio app or
wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 12 (59:16):
Das.

Speaker 9 (59:17):
Catch up on what you've missed on the free iHeartRadio
app