August 14, 2024 • 31 mins
Removing the stigma around menopause begins with us. It starts with women being honest and frank, which in turn, will help other women feel supported. Pats chats with fellow veteran Journalist & Podcaster Sarah Patterson
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
I'm Patrina Jones, and this episode Maybe I'm a Chronic
OVI Sharer really cuts to the core of the sometimes
awkward symptoms of menopause for some women. I promised you
a frank, no holds barred series, and this is exactly
what my catch up with Sarah Patterson is, completely unfiltered.
We've been made since we're teenagers working in regional radio
(00:24):
together as cadets, and have shared all of life's ups
and downs and have been a constant support to one another,
none more so than right now as we tackle head
on our menopause journeys. So pull up a chair and
let me introduce you to one of my BFFs, Sarah Patterson.
I'd like to welcome to this episode a very well
(00:46):
renowned radio journalist thirty plus years experience, Sarah Patterson Radio Today,
a reporter, former TV reporter, news director, podcaster.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
If you might have caught her podcast Food.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Bites and a woman taking on and winning hopefully at menopause.
How are you very well, Patrina, Thank you so much
for having me on. We have been dear friends for
a very long time, so.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Much so that we call each other by our pet
nicknames Ethel and Beryl. That's right.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
And I have known Beryl now since I was I
reckon seventeen or eighteen.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Yeah, I still remember the day I met you out
the front of three and eight in Wangaratta. You had
a floral dress on and Doc Martins AND's you know,
white ankle socks and you had corkscrew curls.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
Oh yeah, No, that's traumatic that you bring that up yet. No,
we've known each other a long time and quite most
days we do chat absolute days, and it's usually centered
around menopause. And I thought we need to bring this
to the podcast because you helped me so much cope
with what I'm going through.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
As you deal with me. And it is. It's a
bit of a head fuck at absolutely is. There's no
other description for it is there. And I think the
thing I feel most is ripped off that I didn't
know that this is what it was going to be like.
I think so many of us hear about the warnings,
oh you'll have a few hot flushes, but otherwise, you know,
(02:15):
my mother would say it's the change of life. I
hate that expression change of life because it doesn't go
anywhere near to describing how shitty it is.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Yeah, what are you struggling with most at the moment?
Do you think or does it ebb and flow?
Speaker 2 (02:29):
I think well, speaking of the hot flushes, I think
they are driving me nuts, especially at night, because they're
impeding my ability to get a good night's sleep. And
they're not just you know, feeling a bit hot. They're ferocious.
I can feel it starting in my ankles in the
middle of the night, and it'll slowly rise up through
my chest and eventually feel like my head's about to explode,
(02:53):
and like almost like a Boeing seven four sevens taking
off from my scalp in the middle of the night
when you've got your husband next to you. Who my
husband is. He's quite a cold sort of person who
likes to keep worn. Here I am on the other side,
red hot. It's not a great combination.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
No, it's the sleep I reckon I had. I was
telling you earlier about four hours sleep last night, no
particular reason why. And when you're sitting sleeping there, laying
there trying to sleep, and you know you've got to
get up at three am, it just makes it worse.
And then you have all these thoughts in your head.
It's like you can't wind down because I think the
(03:33):
anxiety is something I'm struggling with. It's like it all
feeds off each other.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
I agree, I agree, I think it's all connected.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
It is what sort of stuff have you tried? Have
you tried herbal or are you doing exercise, meditation?
Speaker 2 (03:48):
What's working for you. I had somebody recommend a cream
to me, I think a progesterone based cream which you
just put on the crook of your elbow or you
can put it on your chest. This was a few
months ago, and I thought, well, I'll give it a
red hot go because you know it can't hurt.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
Why the hell?
Speaker 2 (04:08):
And this friend of mine ordered it, I think from
the United States and sent it to me. Wasn't cheap,
but she swore by it now. I tried it for
no couple of weeks and then I don't know whether
it was related to the cream or what, but I
started to feel quite sick in the guts, and I thought, oh,
this isn't a good reaction. I didn't feel like it
was really helping me with the hot flushes, so I
(04:30):
gave that up. But at the moment, and I've mentioned
this to you, I've been taking what are called Tranquil
night tablets. They're blackmors. I think the brand is just
get them from the chemist and they look they take
the edge off the hot flushes. But like you say,
it's the anxiety that really messes with your head.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
Yeah, yeah, it's just I mean, you're like me. You've
worked decades in the media, frontline media, where you've been
reporting on scenes.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Like you're used to.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
You're no stranger to adversity in the workfront, on the workfront.
Yet some days just doing one thing is so overwhelming.
I don't know what it is. It's just I think
it's that stage of your life where you have elderly parents,
you've got a teenage a teenager in the house, you've
got a teenage son.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
It's like you try to.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Spin all these plates and everything just sort of converges
in one and it's really really overwhelming some days.
Speaker 2 (05:29):
What are the things you think that people don't understand
or misunderstand? You know?
Speaker 1 (05:34):
What I find most debilitating is the zero to one
hundred in split second sort of mental shifts where you
just fly off the handle and you're very aware that
you're doing it, and then the extreme guilt you feel.
This is when you're home and your snap at your
(05:55):
partner or your child, and it's the guilt that you
just are you for days after and you know it's
like totally out of proportion. But how do you I
guess it feels like it came from a different person. Absolutely,
you feel like you standing in the room looking at
yourself doing it and it is just completely and you
(06:16):
know after it how unreasonable it was, and it could
be over the smallest, slightest thing, yep.
Speaker 2 (06:23):
And then then you feel like the stereotypical menopausal woman saying, oh,
you know, I really fit the bill here. I am
screaming like a banshee for no apparent reason.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
Just snap. But you know what, I think we need
to be kinder on ourselves because we're the ones going
through it, and of course obviously those in the household
as well, because they're living through it with us. But
I think we're so harsh on ourselves as women and
so judgy, and we need to just take a step
back and think about what you're doing. You've got a career,
(06:55):
you're a mum, you're going through this massive hormonal shift
in your life. Don't be so sort of judgmental of
how you're coping. Some days are better than others, and
other days are shit, aren't.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
They really well? And the proportion of shit days tends
to outweigh the proportion of good ones. When you have
a good days, it's really good. But then it literally
comes up and bites you on the ass, and sometimes
in ways you don't expect, in really unsavory sort of ways.
I mean, we've talked about the anxiety, and I've always
had a tendency towards anxiety. I just thought, as you
(07:30):
got older, anxiety eases off and you start you know,
you get older, and you know, you just relax, you
know how, you retire and you wander off into the sunset.
For me, it doesn't work like that. For me, the
anxiety gets worse, and I feel like menopause and all
this hormonal shit flying around is exacerbating my anxiety absolutely,
(07:51):
you know, to the point where, look, and this is
this isn't a nice topic to discuss, But I was
doing breakfast radio like you, and getting in the car
at three o'clock in the morning to drive into work.
And after I started perry menopause, I started to get
(08:11):
this anxiety that I wouldn't make it to work without
having an accident with my bows. So I would I
would pack, I would pack tissues, I would pack wipes,
I would pack plastic bags, towels in the car. And
I think it's almost perpetuated in my head, you know
that this was going to happen, that I would be
(08:34):
seized by this overcopwhelming urge to ship myself basically in
the car stop anywhere.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
I've had that too, though, like I actually have a
couple of times. And when it happened the first time,
luckily both times I've been home.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
But when it.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Happened the first time, you know what it is. It
wasn't so much sudden the first time. It was more, Okay,
I do need to go to the bathroom, but I'll
just hang out a load of washing because I've got time. Yeah,
and your body says, actually, no, you don't. You can't
actually put me off, or no, you can't go and
collect the mail or put the bin out.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
You actually you need to go to the bathroom. Yes, now, yes.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
And I thought that's really weird because when I had
who won't wait for you?
Speaker 2 (09:13):
That's it?
Speaker 1 (09:14):
When my daughter I didn't have a vaginal birth a
cesarean section, and I thought, stupidly, I thought, well, nothing's
really nothing has been too bent out of shape down there,
so why.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
Why are my bows?
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Like?
Speaker 1 (09:29):
What's going on? But I think it's more common than
perhaps than we think, and if everyone was honest, it
happens to a lot of women.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Yeah, I'd like to know that it happens to a
lot of other women. So that just makes you, it
doesn't well, it makes you a prisoner of yourself. It
makes you withdraw from work, from society, and you know,
makes you fearful of even just going out and doing
social things that people take for granted.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
Do you find that with bladder control as well?
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Very much? So. I always like to plot my if
I'm going out anywhere, I like to know where the
nearest toilet is. And I'm one of those people who
goes to the toilet just in case.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Before I ye, empty the tank, Yeah, empty the tank.
There's a lot they can do for that now, Like
I know, my physio has done a special course that
helps with pelvic flows, so I haven't.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
I haven't done it yet. Apparently you can do it
at the traffic lights.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
Apparently, But you know what, my kindecologist who's been practicing
in Melbourne. Lionel Steinberg a vaginal line, they call it.
He's wonderful. His name just demands that.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
He's just amazing.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
He said once that you should actually be doing it
from the age of light twelve or thirteen.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
So I've said to my daughter, this is what you need.
She looked at me weird, like, yeah, right, whatever, And
I think, no, you'll thank me when you're on because
I honestly I don't do it.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
Yeah, and I may. I don't do it. I try to,
and then then I figure and then you forget. You
might do it one day, yeah, and then it's like,
oh damn, it's been like a week since. Oh well whatever. Now,
how do you go with overall dryness, not just your skin,
your hair, your eyes?
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Do you do you just feel dry down there? I
haven't got that yet. I haven't got that yet. But
skin prickly and itchy and ears the other thing. For me,
I've got dermatitis in my ears, which is probably related
to menopause and drives me batty. The itch like ants
(11:31):
crawling over your skin.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
Hair is the other thing. Not so much skin, probably
as hair. It's just manky initially, probably when I was
at the start of perimenopause, maybe I don't know, eighty
months two years ago. It just wouldn't sit right, and
I'd think it was the hair dress or all the
products I'm using, so I change the products and think,
(11:55):
oh this, or you know, said nah, it was like
no amount of fuss over it would fix it. And
it gets greasy, very like it's just not my hair.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Yeah. Mine feels like it's gone back to being baby hair,
almost almost baby fine, with no life or body yes
in it, limp, very limp.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
I had Imagen crump on and she was saying she's
had straight hair her entire life, and her hair has
gone curly, curly, like she's had a perm Yeah, like insane.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
These are all the things we don't hear about. It's
so far beyond the old hot flushes, isn't it.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
But don't you think that's the frustrating thing of it
that it's just so random? There are so honestly, dozens
and dozens and dozens of symptoms.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
Doesn't mean you'll get them.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
All naturally, but just weird stuff. Speaking of image, and
I did want to get your opinion on this.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Now you haven't heard.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
This audio before she was speaking on the OBC. I
think she has helped change the narrative of menopause and
makes kind of helped normalize it.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
You the audio.
Speaker 3 (13:01):
Let's move on to the Australian. It has the latest
time the Prime Minister to visit the China.
Speaker 4 (13:05):
Yes and not a pardon Michael, big chill. But the
PM doesn't pander yet. So the bilateral meeting between Australia
and China, Anthony Albert easy and Chinese. I'm so sorry
I could keep stumbling through this, but I am having
such a perimoral perimenopausal right.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Now live on air. It's so soften.
Speaker 5 (13:32):
The point about this is that we need to make
it normal. You have these kinds of conversations, and I
love you for even saying it, because we interview people,
We talk to people about this and this is the reality.
Speaker 4 (13:46):
I don't think all bones respect to national television.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
It's the furthest of the sun.
Speaker 3 (13:51):
Sorry, listen, we'll let you take take a breathe, thank you,
thank you for being honest about it. We can and
while Imagen takes in some deep press, listen, we want
to throw.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
What do you think about that?
Speaker 2 (14:06):
Oh my god, I just want to cry for her
because that I can. I think we've all been we've
all been there, and she was just so refreshingly honest
about it, just the whole menopause fog and menopause brain
under And I found it interesting that one of the
interviewers was saying, yes, we need to we need to
talk more about this, we need to get it out
(14:26):
in the open. It's it's menopause fog brain, whereas the
gentleman interviewer basically said, well, we'll let imagen just collect us,
collect herself and but no image. And you are a
champion just for being honest enough to make us all
feel you know how it would to me feel. I
actually wanted to scream it from the rooftop. So I thought, Wow,
(14:49):
you've just done such an amazing service to your sisterhood.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
But also it made me want to do better with
the whole conversation around menopause, because there's been so many
times I've talked to you before, how I've been on
air and I'll be going on a spiel and my
brain fog will hit and it's like to stop, sign
I look like an absolute idiot because I've got as
(15:13):
It's like the rug is pulled out from under you.
You know, it's just you can't remember names, you can't
remember what you were talking about.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
It's horrible. It's terrible. I mean, and we you know,
I reckon. We we're pretty eloquent kind of people. Sometimes
we are depends how many drinks we've had alcohol. That's
another subject to get onto. But you're right, it is
like a huge stop sign or a handbrake gets pulled on.
You think, what was I talking about? Where was I
going with this? And it's embarrassing. You feel embarrassed, you
(15:42):
feel inadequate, and you just feel like a laughing stock
sometimes and you can't explain it. But Imagen has explained
it perfectly. And it's menopause. It's your brain, it's your hormones.
It doesn't they don't work the same way anymore.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
Yeah, I don't know if she realizes just how amazing
that was. And I'm sorry to play it again. She'll
be listening and she'll be probably hiding under a table.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
But I think she's done a service to so many people.
She really has.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
There's some really interesting stats from HCF, the Health Fund
on menopause. Just one in four twenty six percent of
women's surveyed say they'd feel comfortable speaking about periminopause and
minopause with their pharmacist or chemist, even six percent the
equivalent of three hundred and ninety thousand women, So they
do not feel comfortable speaking about it with anyone. Wow,
(16:31):
that stigma is still.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Why is it? Why do we still feel at it?
Speaker 1 (16:36):
I think it's ageism, and I think it's you know,
it's that stage of life in inverted commas where you
sort of feel that you can't procreate anymore, so what
good are you to society? Shove you off into the
top paddic And it's so ironic because I think you're
at a point in your career where you're absolutely smashing it.
You know, we've been working decades to perfect our craft,
(16:59):
and we are, you know where finally, I think, finding
both ourselves in our sort of within ourselves, not making
apologies anymore, but also really you know, hitting six in
our careers yet.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
And I totally forgot what.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
I was about to say that you go, there's a
brain fop for you. But so so on one hand,
you doing so successfully, but then on the other it's
kind of like, well, yeah, you kind of have this
feeling that you're a bit of a has been you're
getting older now you're not kind of with it, you.
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Know, and that's where the anxiety kicks in again. And
like you say, it's all interrelated. It's like this this
circle and it just keeps it just keeps going on
and going round.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
I just don't understand it. I just that's that's as
you know. I want to do the podcast because I
want to open the conversation and you know parts of
it you talked about bells before. But that's what I
want to do. It's not going to be a podcast
where don't listen. If you just want to clean and tidy.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
It's going to get messy.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
That's what we have to do to make other people,
other women feel supported and know that this is a community,
and feel supported with what you're going through because so
many other millions of women around the world are going
through the same thing. There is an element of menopause
that I have discovered that that's a bit of a positive,
(18:21):
but it outweighed by a negative, and that is hair growth.
You'll find that you look on your face, that you'll
find that hair grows and in the strangest of places.
But what I have discovered and that I am into
menopause now, so I have been twelve months without a period,
so I'm on the other side. But I have found
(18:41):
amazingly I've not had to shave my legs or wax
my legs.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
All the hair on my legs is gone. They're smooth
as a baby's barm. Yeah, but I think all the
hair from my legs has migrated to my chin and
you're getting these. I remember when I was a little
kid in a grown up in Curranborough. I was in
the newsagent. I clearly remember this old woman. She was
standing at the stationery area picking out a birthday card
(19:09):
and she had a beard. She had a coarse black beard.
I mean Ned Kelly would have been proud of this beard.
And I remember as a little kid looking up thinking
that's that's most odd, what's going on there? And until
I started sprouting these coarse, coarse black hairs out of
my chin, not to mention the white whiskers that start
(19:32):
sprouting in my eyebrows.
Speaker 1 (19:34):
That laser will not will not fit.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Yeah, I started to see, Okay, I get how this
could happen. And I know you have told me off
on several occasions about this. But I'm sorry I've kept doing.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
It because you're not still doing it.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
Well, I have it once or twice. I did this
morning actually before I came in, Yes I did. I
just shaved my chin. I know you're not.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
If you go and do a laser as a follower
my fine with hair. It grows places where you don't
want it and not in the places you do, yes
want it. See, hair is not new to me because
with polycystic syndrome, I always had.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
So that's why I got onto the laser. It's fantastic.
You have been telling me for years about las. I
need to do it.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Ever done.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
But in sheer desperation this morning, I just grabbed my
husband's bit grazer and I just over the chin and
feels nice and feels nice and smooth.
Speaker 1 (20:28):
Now, why are they so black? And course, why can't
they be like fair fine exactly so you're not overly dark?
Speaker 2 (20:35):
No, how does that work? I don't know.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
It's it's very unjust.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
And the white John Howard type whiskers.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Oh that's the other thing odd, like talking John Howard eyebrows,
like really crazy out of control eyebrows.
Speaker 3 (20:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
Ye can't tame them like mensies. Yeah, it's although then
they'll start to taper off and they'll be really smina
quite sparse. Yes, yeah, everything feels like it's getting sparse.
My hair feels like my eyebrows and thankfully my legs
are devoid of any that's a bonus. Well, yeah, I
just I have to look at things to look forward to.
I love it.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
Another stat that I quite was surprised by those who
are currently in minopause or post menopause are more likely
than those who have not yet started perry or are
unsure if they have to say they feel comfortable talking
to friends female friends about the topic seventy four percent
and seventy two percent compared to fifty two and forty nine.
(21:35):
What does that say that I don't know. Maybe I'm
chronic overshare, but I.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
Just think as we get older, I do think our
care factor diminishes. Yeah, I think we we learn what
is important in life. We become aware of our own mortality,
and we think, if not now, when are we going
to talk about it? You know, we're not going to
be here forever. No, our parents' generation didn't talk about
(22:00):
this stuff, which is exactly why my mother would call
it the change of life, not to menopause. But our
generation thankfully is describing it for what it is.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
I'm hoping we're turning the boat, and certainly for other
girls after us, I'm hoping they won't have to have
the conversation to have the conversation. I'm just hoping that
it's hey, yeah, I'm going through menopause, going back to
menopause in the workplace, how toility like You've got a
(22:30):
great setup, your sort of flexible and writing from home.
Did you think that helps you or is it still
just a.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
Bloody I think it's helped me a lot in terms
of anxiety and especially that matter we talked about before
having to go in a car anywhere, especially early in
the morning. It's given me much greater flexibility because I'm
in my own home. Before I was in actual menopause
and I was still perimenopause, or I was having incredibly
(22:59):
heavy periods revolting just and oh my goodness, it almost
it felt like it's sat the laughing out of me.
And I was glad for that reason that I could
actually just pick myself up off the office heare go
and just sit on the couch in my own home
and just chill out and deal with it. I feel
(23:22):
that that's given me a lot more flexibility being at home.
Speaker 1 (23:25):
What like if it got any worse, or you say,
now you're fully through menapausal because you haven't had a
period for twelve months, at what point do you think,
and we've discussed this as well, at what point do
you think you would try like an HRT patch or
something like that, Because that's always my question.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
We've been Yeah, we've been talking about this, haven't we
for a month. I don't know what some and I
don't know what honestly we're hesitating for, to be honest,
or the only thing I can think of is that
you say HRT and people will immediately associate that with
a cancer risk, Whereas if you do read up on it,
(24:07):
and you know, Jeene Hale's Foundation will tell you that
the risk of cancer is absolutely minute. Whereas if these
things are available to us and are going to give
us relief, why the heck aren't we just using them?
Speaker 1 (24:21):
I think that's the thing again, there's a stigma around
breast cancer and that, but you know, it doesn't help.
I had my very when I turned fifty I had
my first bowel no, no, no, mammogram, mammogram, that's right,
I had my first mammogram, you'll remember. And the first thing,
and I've got a cancer history. The first thing the
(24:43):
nurse said when I sat down, and I was already
like my anxiety, yeah, as you know, it sky high
after my I had kidney cancer.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
I didn't have breast cancer, I remember, you know, so
that was a terrible time.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
In that setting. First thing she said when I sat
down was are you on h And you know what
my inner monologue said was, well, that's it. That's just
made my mind up on that because if there was
any risk of that ever happening again to me, forget it.
But that's really not the right, Yeah, not the right
attitude to have, because, like you say, look at the stats,
(25:16):
speak to your GP, and you know what, it works
for someone women, maybe not everyone, but I think they've
changed the name of it. They don't call it agent anymore.
But there's also these patches are great, but you can't
get them. Apparently it's like a worldwide shortage. You can't gosh,
you can't get them.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Yeah. I had a discussion with my eighty nine year
old mum about this. My mum had a radical hysterectomy
at the age of forty eight and she went straight
on to hormone replacement therapy. And when I discussed with
her about the possibility of me going down that route,
she said, well, look at me. Hasn't held me. She's
eighty nine, She's in an incredible nick And so I
(25:54):
think it's something we really really need to, you know,
stop questioning, go to your GP, like I get to
get advice. Yeah, and then just do it. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:03):
Information is power. So would you consider yourself as postmenopausal now?
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (26:08):
So you're out out of the desk my life.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
You know what my last my last period, I was
do you know what I was doing? And I had
a mega, absolutely full on flow period. Unexpectedly, I was
eleven months without a period, and there I was going.
Happened to me?
Speaker 3 (26:24):
There?
Speaker 2 (26:24):
I was in the middle of the Elvis exhibition and Bendigo,
you know, admiring Priscilla's Brenan Love, and the gates opened
there in the exhibition, and what's the most at eleven
it's like playing monopoly. Then I had to go back
to go and start again.
Speaker 1 (26:42):
That's the thing. It's almost like a rude joke. Is
it like around hot day? It's like, what back? Just
that happened to me as well. It was just before
Christmas and Chris and I were going into my husband
and I were going into the city for a couple
of nights for a mini break, and he hadn't even
put the suitcase down. And I went to the bathroom
(27:03):
and you are not believe, like seriously, and I thought
I was. I could see the sunshine on the other
side of the hill. It's like I'm MILLI there and.
Speaker 2 (27:15):
Then it was taken away in one felloped out from you.
And usually it's done with gusto too, I don't know
in your situation, but it was. It was literally you say,
the flood gates over, Well, there was a flood. Horrible,
absolutely awful.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
Did you get the heavy heaviness of that for a while.
I really only got it for like one or two months, Yeah,
probably just the last few I reckon. It was almost
like period wanted to have a last last so I'm
really going to put you through the mill, Sarah, and
it did.
Speaker 2 (27:43):
Oh gosh.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
Words of advice from one woman to another, What would
your advice be to women who are embarking this wonderful journey.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
Well, I would say strap yourself in and be prepared
for anything, because you you just can't can't predict where
this journey's going to take you. Be prepared for it
to impact you mentally, is what I would say. I
had no idea how much it would affect my moods,
and I've had some incredibly, incredibly confronting mood swings. I'm
(28:16):
a fairly you know, easy going person, I would like
to think, but I turned into a monster and continue
too at different times of my life with my family,
and I've got a much shorter fuse than I used
to have. So just be kind to yourself, Just see
what alternatives don't like. Just don't sit there and suffer
(28:38):
through it. Try and find try and find a remedy.
Well there's not a remedy, but try and find something
that will help you get through it.
Speaker 1 (28:44):
And I think that's the thing. What works for one
woman won't necessarily work for someone else. It's a bit
of trial and error. Patience, I think is a big thing.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
Yeah yeah, So what's your what's your overriding piece of advice?
Do you reckon whine? The problem with wine is you
just stayed time makes your honor process it the same way,
which is a real it's really bloody. Feels ripped off
about that too, because all it does is give you
a red face and make you feel like shit. Yes
the next day, Yes takes.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
Not that I drink, as you know, I don't drink
actually that much because of my kidney. But I actually,
if you were to ask me like you did, what
what is it that helped? I actually don't know. I
actually feel like I'm stabbing around in the dark most days.
I think trying to keep a positive attitude and understanding
that what is happening to me is completely natural. It
(29:38):
doesn't have to be enjoyable, but it's completely natural, and
that it's not long term, that this too.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
Shall pass yep. And you're not on your own.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
Exactly exactly, and that's why we need to talk as
much as we can about it, Okay, to help other women.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
Thanks Pad, I love you lot, I love you two.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
I really hope you felt episode five maybe I m chronic.
Oversharer was like evesdropping on two best es at your
local cafe.
Speaker 2 (30:05):
And I also hope.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
It's given women struggling with the symptoms some solace. We're
all here to support one another on this journey. If
you want to share your experiences, reach out, follow and
message me on Insta Petrina Jones Newman. We've touched on
the impacts of menopause in the workplace and I want
to investigate that further. The Bureau of Stats has found
women are retiring seven years before men on average, and
(30:29):
twelve years before their desired age of retirement, with the
Institute of Superannuation Trustees estimating menopause may cost women age
fifty to fifty four more than fifteen billion per year
in lost earnings and super Clearly we need to do better.
Unions in our campaigning for ten days paid reproductive leave.
(30:50):
My next episode features Michelle O'Neill, President of the Australian
Council of Trade Unions. I wanted to find out a
little more about what it is poising
Speaker 2 (31:03):
I
I'm Patrina Jones, and this episode Maybe I'm a Chronic
OVI Sharer really cuts to the core of the sometimes
awkward symptoms of menopause for some women. I promised you
a frank, no holds barred series, and this is exactly
what my catch up with Sarah Patterson is, completely unfiltered.
We've been made since we're teenagers working in regional radio
(00:24):
together as cadets, and have shared all of life's ups
and downs and have been a constant support to one another,
none more so than right now as we tackle head
on our menopause journeys. So pull up a chair and
let me introduce you to one of my BFFs, Sarah Patterson.
I'd like to welcome to this episode a very well
(00:46):
renowned radio journalist thirty plus years experience, Sarah Patterson Radio Today,
a reporter, former TV reporter, news director, podcaster.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
If you might have caught her podcast Food.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Bites and a woman taking on and winning hopefully at menopause.
How are you very well, Patrina, Thank you so much
for having me on. We have been dear friends for
a very long time, so.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Much so that we call each other by our pet
nicknames Ethel and Beryl. That's right.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
And I have known Beryl now since I was I
reckon seventeen or eighteen.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Yeah, I still remember the day I met you out
the front of three and eight in Wangaratta. You had
a floral dress on and Doc Martins AND's you know,
white ankle socks and you had corkscrew curls.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
Oh yeah, No, that's traumatic that you bring that up yet. No,
we've known each other a long time and quite most
days we do chat absolute days, and it's usually centered
around menopause. And I thought we need to bring this
to the podcast because you helped me so much cope
with what I'm going through.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
As you deal with me. And it is. It's a
bit of a head fuck at absolutely is. There's no
other description for it is there. And I think the
thing I feel most is ripped off that I didn't
know that this is what it was going to be like.
I think so many of us hear about the warnings,
oh you'll have a few hot flushes, but otherwise, you know,
(02:15):
my mother would say it's the change of life. I
hate that expression change of life because it doesn't go
anywhere near to describing how shitty it is.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Yeah, what are you struggling with most at the moment?
Do you think or does it ebb and flow?
Speaker 2 (02:29):
I think well, speaking of the hot flushes, I think
they are driving me nuts, especially at night, because they're
impeding my ability to get a good night's sleep. And
they're not just you know, feeling a bit hot. They're ferocious.
I can feel it starting in my ankles in the
middle of the night, and it'll slowly rise up through
my chest and eventually feel like my head's about to explode,
(02:53):
and like almost like a Boeing seven four sevens taking
off from my scalp in the middle of the night
when you've got your husband next to you. Who my
husband is. He's quite a cold sort of person who
likes to keep worn. Here I am on the other side,
red hot. It's not a great combination.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
No, it's the sleep I reckon I had. I was
telling you earlier about four hours sleep last night, no
particular reason why. And when you're sitting sleeping there, laying
there trying to sleep, and you know you've got to
get up at three am, it just makes it worse.
And then you have all these thoughts in your head.
It's like you can't wind down because I think the
(03:33):
anxiety is something I'm struggling with. It's like it all
feeds off each other.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
I agree, I agree, I think it's all connected.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
It is what sort of stuff have you tried? Have
you tried herbal or are you doing exercise, meditation?
Speaker 2 (03:48):
What's working for you. I had somebody recommend a cream
to me, I think a progesterone based cream which you
just put on the crook of your elbow or you
can put it on your chest. This was a few
months ago, and I thought, well, I'll give it a
red hot go because you know it can't hurt.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
Why the hell?
Speaker 2 (04:08):
And this friend of mine ordered it, I think from
the United States and sent it to me. Wasn't cheap,
but she swore by it now. I tried it for
no couple of weeks and then I don't know whether
it was related to the cream or what, but I
started to feel quite sick in the guts, and I thought, oh,
this isn't a good reaction. I didn't feel like it
was really helping me with the hot flushes, so I
(04:30):
gave that up. But at the moment, and I've mentioned
this to you, I've been taking what are called Tranquil
night tablets. They're blackmors. I think the brand is just
get them from the chemist and they look they take
the edge off the hot flushes. But like you say,
it's the anxiety that really messes with your head.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
Yeah, yeah, it's just I mean, you're like me. You've
worked decades in the media, frontline media, where you've been
reporting on scenes.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Like you're used to.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
You're no stranger to adversity in the workfront, on the workfront.
Yet some days just doing one thing is so overwhelming.
I don't know what it is. It's just I think
it's that stage of your life where you have elderly parents,
you've got a teenage a teenager in the house, you've
got a teenage son.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
It's like you try to.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Spin all these plates and everything just sort of converges
in one and it's really really overwhelming some days.
Speaker 2 (05:29):
What are the things you think that people don't understand
or misunderstand? You know?
Speaker 1 (05:34):
What I find most debilitating is the zero to one
hundred in split second sort of mental shifts where you
just fly off the handle and you're very aware that
you're doing it, and then the extreme guilt you feel.
This is when you're home and your snap at your
(05:55):
partner or your child, and it's the guilt that you
just are you for days after and you know it's
like totally out of proportion. But how do you I
guess it feels like it came from a different person. Absolutely,
you feel like you standing in the room looking at
yourself doing it and it is just completely and you
(06:16):
know after it how unreasonable it was, and it could
be over the smallest, slightest thing, yep.
Speaker 2 (06:23):
And then then you feel like the stereotypical menopausal woman saying, oh,
you know, I really fit the bill here. I am
screaming like a banshee for no apparent reason.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
Just snap. But you know what, I think we need
to be kinder on ourselves because we're the ones going
through it, and of course obviously those in the household
as well, because they're living through it with us. But
I think we're so harsh on ourselves as women and
so judgy, and we need to just take a step
back and think about what you're doing. You've got a career,
(06:55):
you're a mum, you're going through this massive hormonal shift
in your life. Don't be so sort of judgmental of
how you're coping. Some days are better than others, and
other days are shit, aren't.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
They really well? And the proportion of shit days tends
to outweigh the proportion of good ones. When you have
a good days, it's really good. But then it literally
comes up and bites you on the ass, and sometimes
in ways you don't expect, in really unsavory sort of ways.
I mean, we've talked about the anxiety, and I've always
had a tendency towards anxiety. I just thought, as you
(07:30):
got older, anxiety eases off and you start you know,
you get older, and you know, you just relax, you
know how, you retire and you wander off into the sunset.
For me, it doesn't work like that. For me, the
anxiety gets worse, and I feel like menopause and all
this hormonal shit flying around is exacerbating my anxiety absolutely,
(07:51):
you know, to the point where, look, and this is
this isn't a nice topic to discuss, But I was
doing breakfast radio like you, and getting in the car
at three o'clock in the morning to drive into work.
And after I started perry menopause, I started to get
(08:11):
this anxiety that I wouldn't make it to work without
having an accident with my bows. So I would I
would pack, I would pack tissues, I would pack wipes,
I would pack plastic bags, towels in the car. And
I think it's almost perpetuated in my head, you know
that this was going to happen, that I would be
(08:34):
seized by this overcopwhelming urge to ship myself basically in
the car stop anywhere.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
I've had that too, though, like I actually have a
couple of times. And when it happened the first time,
luckily both times I've been home.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
But when it.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Happened the first time, you know what it is. It
wasn't so much sudden the first time. It was more, Okay,
I do need to go to the bathroom, but I'll
just hang out a load of washing because I've got time. Yeah,
and your body says, actually, no, you don't. You can't
actually put me off, or no, you can't go and
collect the mail or put the bin out.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
You actually you need to go to the bathroom. Yes, now, yes.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
And I thought that's really weird because when I had
who won't wait for you?
Speaker 2 (09:13):
That's it?
Speaker 1 (09:14):
When my daughter I didn't have a vaginal birth a
cesarean section, and I thought, stupidly, I thought, well, nothing's
really nothing has been too bent out of shape down there,
so why.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
Why are my bows?
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Like?
Speaker 1 (09:29):
What's going on? But I think it's more common than
perhaps than we think, and if everyone was honest, it
happens to a lot of women.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Yeah, I'd like to know that it happens to a
lot of other women. So that just makes you, it
doesn't well, it makes you a prisoner of yourself. It
makes you withdraw from work, from society, and you know,
makes you fearful of even just going out and doing
social things that people take for granted.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
Do you find that with bladder control as well?
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Very much? So. I always like to plot my if
I'm going out anywhere, I like to know where the
nearest toilet is. And I'm one of those people who
goes to the toilet just in case.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Before I ye, empty the tank, Yeah, empty the tank.
There's a lot they can do for that now, Like
I know, my physio has done a special course that
helps with pelvic flows, so I haven't.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
I haven't done it yet. Apparently you can do it
at the traffic lights.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
Apparently, But you know what, my kindecologist who's been practicing
in Melbourne. Lionel Steinberg a vaginal line, they call it.
He's wonderful. His name just demands that.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
He's just amazing.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
He said once that you should actually be doing it
from the age of light twelve or thirteen.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
So I've said to my daughter, this is what you need.
She looked at me weird, like, yeah, right, whatever, And
I think, no, you'll thank me when you're on because
I honestly I don't do it.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
Yeah, and I may. I don't do it. I try to,
and then then I figure and then you forget. You
might do it one day, yeah, and then it's like,
oh damn, it's been like a week since. Oh well whatever. Now,
how do you go with overall dryness, not just your skin,
your hair, your eyes?
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Do you do you just feel dry down there? I
haven't got that yet. I haven't got that yet. But
skin prickly and itchy and ears the other thing. For me,
I've got dermatitis in my ears, which is probably related
to menopause and drives me batty. The itch like ants
(11:31):
crawling over your skin.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
Hair is the other thing. Not so much skin, probably
as hair. It's just manky initially, probably when I was
at the start of perimenopause, maybe I don't know, eighty
months two years ago. It just wouldn't sit right, and
I'd think it was the hair dress or all the
products I'm using, so I change the products and think,
(11:55):
oh this, or you know, said nah, it was like
no amount of fuss over it would fix it. And
it gets greasy, very like it's just not my hair.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Yeah. Mine feels like it's gone back to being baby hair,
almost almost baby fine, with no life or body yes
in it, limp, very limp.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
I had Imagen crump on and she was saying she's
had straight hair her entire life, and her hair has
gone curly, curly, like she's had a perm Yeah, like insane.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
These are all the things we don't hear about. It's
so far beyond the old hot flushes, isn't it.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
But don't you think that's the frustrating thing of it
that it's just so random? There are so honestly, dozens
and dozens and dozens of symptoms.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
Doesn't mean you'll get them.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
All naturally, but just weird stuff. Speaking of image, and
I did want to get your opinion on this.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Now you haven't heard.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
This audio before she was speaking on the OBC. I
think she has helped change the narrative of menopause and
makes kind of helped normalize it.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
You the audio.
Speaker 3 (13:01):
Let's move on to the Australian. It has the latest
time the Prime Minister to visit the China.
Speaker 4 (13:05):
Yes and not a pardon Michael, big chill. But the
PM doesn't pander yet. So the bilateral meeting between Australia
and China, Anthony Albert easy and Chinese. I'm so sorry
I could keep stumbling through this, but I am having
such a perimoral perimenopausal right.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Now live on air. It's so soften.
Speaker 5 (13:32):
The point about this is that we need to make
it normal. You have these kinds of conversations, and I
love you for even saying it, because we interview people,
We talk to people about this and this is the reality.
Speaker 4 (13:46):
I don't think all bones respect to national television.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
It's the furthest of the sun.
Speaker 3 (13:51):
Sorry, listen, we'll let you take take a breathe, thank you,
thank you for being honest about it. We can and
while Imagen takes in some deep press, listen, we want
to throw.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
What do you think about that?
Speaker 2 (14:06):
Oh my god, I just want to cry for her
because that I can. I think we've all been we've
all been there, and she was just so refreshingly honest
about it, just the whole menopause fog and menopause brain
under And I found it interesting that one of the
interviewers was saying, yes, we need to we need to
talk more about this, we need to get it out
(14:26):
in the open. It's it's menopause fog brain, whereas the
gentleman interviewer basically said, well, we'll let imagen just collect us,
collect herself and but no image. And you are a
champion just for being honest enough to make us all
feel you know how it would to me feel. I
actually wanted to scream it from the rooftop. So I thought, Wow,
(14:49):
you've just done such an amazing service to your sisterhood.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
But also it made me want to do better with
the whole conversation around menopause, because there's been so many
times I've talked to you before, how I've been on
air and I'll be going on a spiel and my
brain fog will hit and it's like to stop, sign
I look like an absolute idiot because I've got as
(15:13):
It's like the rug is pulled out from under you.
You know, it's just you can't remember names, you can't
remember what you were talking about.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
It's horrible. It's terrible. I mean, and we you know,
I reckon. We we're pretty eloquent kind of people. Sometimes
we are depends how many drinks we've had alcohol. That's
another subject to get onto. But you're right, it is
like a huge stop sign or a handbrake gets pulled on.
You think, what was I talking about? Where was I
going with this? And it's embarrassing. You feel embarrassed, you
(15:42):
feel inadequate, and you just feel like a laughing stock
sometimes and you can't explain it. But Imagen has explained
it perfectly. And it's menopause. It's your brain, it's your hormones.
It doesn't they don't work the same way anymore.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
Yeah, I don't know if she realizes just how amazing
that was. And I'm sorry to play it again. She'll
be listening and she'll be probably hiding under a table.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
But I think she's done a service to so many people.
She really has.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
There's some really interesting stats from HCF, the Health Fund
on menopause. Just one in four twenty six percent of
women's surveyed say they'd feel comfortable speaking about periminopause and
minopause with their pharmacist or chemist, even six percent the
equivalent of three hundred and ninety thousand women, So they
do not feel comfortable speaking about it with anyone. Wow,
(16:31):
that stigma is still.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Why is it? Why do we still feel at it?
Speaker 1 (16:36):
I think it's ageism, and I think it's you know,
it's that stage of life in inverted commas where you
sort of feel that you can't procreate anymore, so what
good are you to society? Shove you off into the
top paddic And it's so ironic because I think you're
at a point in your career where you're absolutely smashing it.
You know, we've been working decades to perfect our craft,
(16:59):
and we are, you know where finally, I think, finding
both ourselves in our sort of within ourselves, not making
apologies anymore, but also really you know, hitting six in
our careers yet.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
And I totally forgot what.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
I was about to say that you go, there's a
brain fop for you. But so so on one hand,
you doing so successfully, but then on the other it's
kind of like, well, yeah, you kind of have this
feeling that you're a bit of a has been you're
getting older now you're not kind of with it, you.
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Know, and that's where the anxiety kicks in again. And
like you say, it's all interrelated. It's like this this
circle and it just keeps it just keeps going on
and going round.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
I just don't understand it. I just that's that's as
you know. I want to do the podcast because I
want to open the conversation and you know parts of
it you talked about bells before. But that's what I
want to do. It's not going to be a podcast
where don't listen. If you just want to clean and tidy.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
It's going to get messy.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
That's what we have to do to make other people,
other women feel supported and know that this is a community,
and feel supported with what you're going through because so
many other millions of women around the world are going
through the same thing. There is an element of menopause
that I have discovered that that's a bit of a positive,
(18:21):
but it outweighed by a negative, and that is hair growth.
You'll find that you look on your face, that you'll
find that hair grows and in the strangest of places.
But what I have discovered and that I am into
menopause now, so I have been twelve months without a period,
so I'm on the other side. But I have found
(18:41):
amazingly I've not had to shave my legs or wax
my legs.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
All the hair on my legs is gone. They're smooth
as a baby's barm. Yeah, but I think all the
hair from my legs has migrated to my chin and
you're getting these. I remember when I was a little
kid in a grown up in Curranborough. I was in
the newsagent. I clearly remember this old woman. She was
standing at the stationery area picking out a birthday card
(19:09):
and she had a beard. She had a coarse black beard.
I mean Ned Kelly would have been proud of this beard.
And I remember as a little kid looking up thinking
that's that's most odd, what's going on there? And until
I started sprouting these coarse, coarse black hairs out of
my chin, not to mention the white whiskers that start
(19:32):
sprouting in my eyebrows.
Speaker 1 (19:34):
That laser will not will not fit.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Yeah, I started to see, Okay, I get how this
could happen. And I know you have told me off
on several occasions about this. But I'm sorry I've kept doing.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
It because you're not still doing it.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
Well, I have it once or twice. I did this
morning actually before I came in, Yes I did. I
just shaved my chin. I know you're not.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
If you go and do a laser as a follower
my fine with hair. It grows places where you don't
want it and not in the places you do, yes
want it. See, hair is not new to me because
with polycystic syndrome, I always had.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
So that's why I got onto the laser. It's fantastic.
You have been telling me for years about las. I
need to do it.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Ever done.
Speaker 2 (20:19):
But in sheer desperation this morning, I just grabbed my
husband's bit grazer and I just over the chin and
feels nice and feels nice and smooth.
Speaker 1 (20:28):
Now, why are they so black? And course, why can't
they be like fair fine exactly so you're not overly dark?
Speaker 2 (20:35):
No, how does that work? I don't know.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
It's it's very unjust.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
And the white John Howard type whiskers.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Oh that's the other thing odd, like talking John Howard eyebrows,
like really crazy out of control eyebrows.
Speaker 3 (20:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
Ye can't tame them like mensies. Yeah, it's although then
they'll start to taper off and they'll be really smina
quite sparse. Yes, yeah, everything feels like it's getting sparse.
My hair feels like my eyebrows and thankfully my legs
are devoid of any that's a bonus. Well, yeah, I
just I have to look at things to look forward to.
I love it.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
Another stat that I quite was surprised by those who
are currently in minopause or post menopause are more likely
than those who have not yet started perry or are
unsure if they have to say they feel comfortable talking
to friends female friends about the topic seventy four percent
and seventy two percent compared to fifty two and forty nine.
(21:35):
What does that say that I don't know. Maybe I'm
chronic overshare, but I.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
Just think as we get older, I do think our
care factor diminishes. Yeah, I think we we learn what
is important in life. We become aware of our own mortality,
and we think, if not now, when are we going
to talk about it? You know, we're not going to
be here forever. No, our parents' generation didn't talk about
(22:00):
this stuff, which is exactly why my mother would call
it the change of life, not to menopause. But our
generation thankfully is describing it for what it is.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
I'm hoping we're turning the boat, and certainly for other
girls after us, I'm hoping they won't have to have
the conversation to have the conversation. I'm just hoping that
it's hey, yeah, I'm going through menopause, going back to
menopause in the workplace, how toility like You've got a
(22:30):
great setup, your sort of flexible and writing from home.
Did you think that helps you or is it still
just a.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
Bloody I think it's helped me a lot in terms
of anxiety and especially that matter we talked about before
having to go in a car anywhere, especially early in
the morning. It's given me much greater flexibility because I'm
in my own home. Before I was in actual menopause
and I was still perimenopause, or I was having incredibly
(22:59):
heavy periods revolting just and oh my goodness, it almost
it felt like it's sat the laughing out of me.
And I was glad for that reason that I could
actually just pick myself up off the office heare go
and just sit on the couch in my own home
and just chill out and deal with it. I feel
(23:22):
that that's given me a lot more flexibility being at home.
Speaker 1 (23:25):
What like if it got any worse, or you say,
now you're fully through menapausal because you haven't had a
period for twelve months, at what point do you think,
and we've discussed this as well, at what point do
you think you would try like an HRT patch or
something like that, Because that's always my question.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
We've been Yeah, we've been talking about this, haven't we
for a month. I don't know what some and I
don't know what honestly we're hesitating for, to be honest,
or the only thing I can think of is that
you say HRT and people will immediately associate that with
a cancer risk, Whereas if you do read up on it,
(24:07):
and you know, Jeene Hale's Foundation will tell you that
the risk of cancer is absolutely minute. Whereas if these
things are available to us and are going to give
us relief, why the heck aren't we just using them?
Speaker 1 (24:21):
I think that's the thing again, there's a stigma around
breast cancer and that, but you know, it doesn't help.
I had my very when I turned fifty I had
my first bowel no, no, no, mammogram, mammogram, that's right,
I had my first mammogram, you'll remember. And the first thing,
and I've got a cancer history. The first thing the
(24:43):
nurse said when I sat down, and I was already
like my anxiety, yeah, as you know, it sky high
after my I had kidney cancer.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
I didn't have breast cancer, I remember, you know, so
that was a terrible time.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
In that setting. First thing she said when I sat
down was are you on h And you know what
my inner monologue said was, well, that's it. That's just
made my mind up on that because if there was
any risk of that ever happening again to me, forget it.
But that's really not the right, Yeah, not the right
attitude to have, because, like you say, look at the stats,
(25:16):
speak to your GP, and you know what, it works
for someone women, maybe not everyone, but I think they've
changed the name of it. They don't call it agent anymore.
But there's also these patches are great, but you can't
get them. Apparently it's like a worldwide shortage. You can't gosh,
you can't get them.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Yeah. I had a discussion with my eighty nine year
old mum about this. My mum had a radical hysterectomy
at the age of forty eight and she went straight
on to hormone replacement therapy. And when I discussed with
her about the possibility of me going down that route,
she said, well, look at me. Hasn't held me. She's
eighty nine, She's in an incredible nick And so I
(25:54):
think it's something we really really need to, you know,
stop questioning, go to your GP, like I get to
get advice. Yeah, and then just do it. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:03):
Information is power. So would you consider yourself as postmenopausal now?
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (26:08):
So you're out out of the desk my life.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
You know what my last my last period, I was
do you know what I was doing? And I had
a mega, absolutely full on flow period. Unexpectedly, I was
eleven months without a period, and there I was going.
Happened to me?
Speaker 3 (26:24):
There?
Speaker 2 (26:24):
I was in the middle of the Elvis exhibition and Bendigo,
you know, admiring Priscilla's Brenan Love, and the gates opened
there in the exhibition, and what's the most at eleven
it's like playing monopoly. Then I had to go back
to go and start again.
Speaker 1 (26:42):
That's the thing. It's almost like a rude joke. Is
it like around hot day? It's like, what back? Just
that happened to me as well. It was just before
Christmas and Chris and I were going into my husband
and I were going into the city for a couple
of nights for a mini break, and he hadn't even
put the suitcase down. And I went to the bathroom
(27:03):
and you are not believe, like seriously, and I thought
I was. I could see the sunshine on the other
side of the hill. It's like I'm MILLI there and.
Speaker 2 (27:15):
Then it was taken away in one felloped out from you.
And usually it's done with gusto too, I don't know
in your situation, but it was. It was literally you say,
the flood gates over, Well, there was a flood. Horrible,
absolutely awful.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
Did you get the heavy heaviness of that for a while.
I really only got it for like one or two months, Yeah,
probably just the last few I reckon. It was almost
like period wanted to have a last last so I'm
really going to put you through the mill, Sarah, and
it did.
Speaker 2 (27:43):
Oh gosh.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
Words of advice from one woman to another, What would
your advice be to women who are embarking this wonderful journey.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
Well, I would say strap yourself in and be prepared
for anything, because you you just can't can't predict where
this journey's going to take you. Be prepared for it
to impact you mentally, is what I would say. I
had no idea how much it would affect my moods,
and I've had some incredibly, incredibly confronting mood swings. I'm
(28:16):
a fairly you know, easy going person, I would like
to think, but I turned into a monster and continue
too at different times of my life with my family,
and I've got a much shorter fuse than I used
to have. So just be kind to yourself, Just see
what alternatives don't like. Just don't sit there and suffer
(28:38):
through it. Try and find try and find a remedy.
Well there's not a remedy, but try and find something
that will help you get through it.
Speaker 1 (28:44):
And I think that's the thing. What works for one
woman won't necessarily work for someone else. It's a bit
of trial and error. Patience, I think is a big thing.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
Yeah yeah, So what's your what's your overriding piece of advice?
Do you reckon whine? The problem with wine is you
just stayed time makes your honor process it the same way,
which is a real it's really bloody. Feels ripped off
about that too, because all it does is give you
a red face and make you feel like shit. Yes
the next day, Yes takes.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
Not that I drink, as you know, I don't drink
actually that much because of my kidney. But I actually,
if you were to ask me like you did, what
what is it that helped? I actually don't know. I
actually feel like I'm stabbing around in the dark most days.
I think trying to keep a positive attitude and understanding
that what is happening to me is completely natural. It
(29:38):
doesn't have to be enjoyable, but it's completely natural, and
that it's not long term, that this too.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
Shall pass yep. And you're not on your own.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
Exactly exactly, and that's why we need to talk as
much as we can about it, Okay, to help other women.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
Thanks Pad, I love you lot, I love you two.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
I really hope you felt episode five maybe I m chronic.
Oversharer was like evesdropping on two best es at your
local cafe.
Speaker 2 (30:05):
And I also hope.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
It's given women struggling with the symptoms some solace. We're
all here to support one another on this journey. If
you want to share your experiences, reach out, follow and
message me on Insta Petrina Jones Newman. We've touched on
the impacts of menopause in the workplace and I want
to investigate that further. The Bureau of Stats has found
women are retiring seven years before men on average, and
(30:29):
twelve years before their desired age of retirement, with the
Institute of Superannuation Trustees estimating menopause may cost women age
fifty to fifty four more than fifteen billion per year
in lost earnings and super Clearly we need to do better.
Unions in our campaigning for ten days paid reproductive leave.
(30:50):
My next episode features Michelle O'Neill, President of the Australian
Council of Trade Unions. I wanted to find out a
little more about what it is poising
Speaker 2 (31:03):
I
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