June 8, 2025 • 32 mins
She thought she was good with money. Her salary was solid. Her bills were paid. She was even traveling. Life looked fine... until it wasn’t. This week’s Money Diary is all about the slow realisation that earning well doesn’t mean you’re building wealth. After a divorce, a court battle, and two lost properties, she hit financial rock bottom. But what really shook her? Watching a $20K bonus disappear, and not being able to say where it went. That was the moment everything changed. She started tracking every dollar and bought a place to call her own doing the work to build a future she's proud of.
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Acknowledgement of Country By Natarsha Bamblett aka Queen Acknowledgements.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
My name is Tatasha Bamblet. I'm a proud First Nations
woman and I'm here to acknowledge country t Glenn Young Ganya, Niana,
Kaka yah y and beIN ah Waka nian Ar gay In, Nimbina,
yakarum Jar, Dominyama, Domagahawakaman, damon Imlan Bomber bang gadaboma In
and now in Wakah ghana on yak rum jar Watnadaa. Hello,
(00:22):
beautiful friends, we gather on the lands of the Aboriginal people.
We thank acknowledge and respect the Abiginal people's land that
we're gathering on today. Take pleasure in all the land
and respect all that you see. She's on the Money
podcast acknowledges culture, country, community and connections, bringing you the tools,
knowledge and resources for you to thrive.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
She's on the Money.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
She's on the Money.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast
that let you be pervy about other people's money habits
for educational purposes, of course. Welcome back to another one
of our money drays where I get the absolute pleasure
of sitting down and having a chat with one of
our beautiful She's on the Money. Community members all about
their journey. Let's jump straight into it, because this week
I got a message and it sounded exactly like this, Dear,
(01:29):
She's on the money. I'm nearly forty five, and for
most of my life I thought I was fine with money.
I earned well, paid the bills, even traveled, but I
never built any real wealth. Growing up in East Germany
under socialism, I believed money came to people on the
right side of the wall. After a messy divorce and
a draining custody battle, I hit financial rock bottom. It
(01:53):
still took years and stumbling across She's on the Money
before I realized the problem wasn't my income, it was
how I used it. I'm finally changing my habits, and
for the first time, I feel like I am in
control money. Darrist, Welcome to the show. This whole story
has so many facets. I don't know if we're going
to have enough time to get into all of this today.
(02:14):
Like that's a lot. Yeah, Hi, welcome to the show.
I'm so excited to talk to you before we dive
completely in. Can you tell me what grade would you
give your money habits if I asked you to give
them a grade from a through to f.
Speaker 4 (02:27):
Oh my god, I really thought long and hard about it,
but I would say maybe a C minus.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
A C minus. All right, well, I think we can
learn a little bit more about that in the next
few minutes. Talk to me. I want to know, tell
me a bit about your money's story.
Speaker 4 (02:42):
Yeah, so, like I alluded, originally, I am originally from
East Germany, and yeah, it was always I don't know.
As a kid, I always thought everything at the other
side of the wall, everything is bigger, shinier. You just
got to get over there and life will be great.
And my mum, she was a mom. I'm an only child.
She worked really, really hard, so my perception of money
(03:06):
was the harder you work, the more you're going to earn,
and that's how you make it in life.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Really, it sounds like your mom was an icon.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
Yeah. She unfortunately passed away when I was twelve.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
So, my goodness, that's another layer to the complex money story.
That would have been terrible, especially if you only had
a single mom.
Speaker 4 (03:26):
Yeah. Yeah, we had just moved over to West Germany.
So she married a West German who was rich, So
that influenced my What was so I thought that he
was rich, just you know, he had money all the time,
and we went on holidays all of a sudden. So
but yeah, it was, yeah, very strange time of my life.
I was, like I said, only twelve years old, and
(03:49):
I met my biological father at my mom's funeral and
ended up moving in with him and his wife back
to East Germany, deep deep East. And yeah, it's just
definitely interesting.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Oh my goodness, meeting your biological dad at your mum's funeral, Like, girl,
that is fifty layers of trauma like that would have
been just like an absolute whirlwind. And at twelve you're
about to go through puberty like that would have been
such challenging time for you. And to come through all
of that and be the icon that you are today,
(04:23):
You're incredible. I am already obsessed with you.
Speaker 4 (04:26):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
So tell me a little bit more about what happened
once you became an adult. So you said went through
a messy divorce, Like what was that? Like, how did
that eventuate?
Speaker 4 (04:37):
Yeah? Yeah, So I always say my thirties are kind
of like down the drain. So I got married when
I was thirty and then had my first child, and
then shortly there after my second. But it was an
abuse of relationship. So eventually, towards the end of my thirties,
I finally like, yes, something happened, and I just, yeah,
decided to leave. And because it was such a toxic relationship,
(05:00):
I basically left everything behind. We were owning two properties
at the time, because originally we were living in Alo
Springs for six years and we had a house there,
and then we moved over to the West Coast and
we bought our second house when I was pregnant with
my daughter, my second child. So eventually I was like
(05:20):
I had enough, I left and I kind of just
gave everything up. We sold the property in Alo Springs
at a loss, and the property in Wi he held on,
so he's still owning that. But yeah, like I said,
I walked away with nothing. And then he took me
to court to fight for the children. So that cost
(05:40):
me a lot of money. Obviously, the lawyer, I was
fifteen thousand dollars, And like I said, I always thought
I was good with money, and I was able to
sustain the lawyer for fair bit. But then eventually I
had to go home to Germany and walk around and
kind of like beg for a bit of money and
a bit support, but yeah, eventually came to an agreement
(06:01):
and the kids are now fifty to fifty, so that's good.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
Yeah, wow, oh my goodness. I feel like it couldn't
get worse. And then you're like, yep, and it was
actually terrible and it walked away with nothing but like
good girl walking away from that. So many people don't
and that's such a hard thing to do. I'm genuinely
so ex Like, I know you said your thirties are
down the drain. I think we actually just learned a
lot during that period, and now you're going to thrive
(06:24):
in your forties. Like forties are the new thirties anyway, right,
Like that's the plan and we're just starting from scratch.
Tell me, how did you end up in Australia? How
were we so lucky to get you?
Speaker 4 (06:34):
Yeah? So I actually came to Australia in two thousand
and seven, so I only came on a work on
holiday visa. So my ideal life was always to travel
as much as possible, So wherever I went, I also
worked because that's the cheapest way of travel, am my eyes.
So I also went to America for two years. If
they're actually I was just listening to the other monaydayya.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
Oh the San Francisco one. Yes, yes, that was a goodie.
Speaker 4 (07:01):
Yeah. Yeah, So I lived in San Francisco for two years,
which was great, and then came back to Germany. But
then Germany is really really small after having lived in
San Francisco for two years, so then, yeah, I went
to Australia on a work on holiday visa. I worked
as a tour guide, but then I just fell in
love with the country and worked really hard. I got
a working visa luckily, so that's how I came to
(07:22):
stay and then met my husband and yeah, rest is history.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
And ended up in Alice Springs. Alice Springs is a
very rogue choice when you said just before, oh, Germany
was really small, like girl, I don't know how to
tell you, but Alice Springs is a little bit smaller.
Speaker 4 (07:41):
Actually, it was not the plan. So the plan. I
always had the job. I was looking for a job
before I left Germany, so I did have the tour
guiding job and Alice Springs before I left, so I
needed their security, but that was only meant to be
a six months stay and then I was going to
travel for you know, another two to four months and
then go back to my job that I had. I
(08:02):
just basically took a spatical in Germany. But yeah, Ellie Springs,
it's so beautiful. I mean, unfortunately not anymore as much
as it was back then. So I ended up living
there for six years, and I also lived a year
at the Rock. It's just that will always be Traue
Australia for me.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
Yeah, no, it's so beautiful.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
Don't get me wrong. Now that I live at the
West Coast close to the beach, I mean I'm like
five minutes down from the beach. That's obviously lifestyle like right.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
There, that's a good deal. And growing up in East Germany,
I bet you never thought that you would live five
minutes from a beach.
Speaker 4 (08:36):
Oh definitely not, No, definitely not.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
That's crazy even though you've been through so much, Like
I feel like you've got this like dreamy little lifestyle now,
like that's beautiful.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (08:47):
No, I'm definitely very fortunate. I've got two beautiful kids,
that's and yeah where I live and yeah, I definitely
can't complain.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
But do so tell me you mentioned before like I
was a travel guide. What do you do for work
now and how much money.
Speaker 4 (08:59):
Do you. So I'm an operations manager at the airport. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
Cool.
Speaker 4 (09:04):
So I've got a base wage of one hundred and
thirty nine one hundred.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
That's so good.
Speaker 4 (09:11):
Yeah, yeah, it's a great Actually, my base pay plus
invalances is like at one hundred and fifty three thousand,
so it's yeah, it's it's fantastic. And then once a
year I get a bonus as well, a twelve percent bonus.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
Excuse me, that is so good. So one fifty three
plus some bonuses here and there, like that means that
we can build some serious like financial freedom. I mean,
so you think, but oh absolutely absolutely. You are still
a baby. You are still young. You said you're forty four, right,
We've got so much time on our side. Talk to
(09:43):
me about how you got into that, because like, I
don't know, I just I love this idea of a journey,
you being so young and having been through so much
to then being an ops manager at an airport in Australia,
Like that's kind of crazy to think that twelve year
old you would move back to East Germany, didn't know
what was going on, like very tumultuous period of your life.
(10:07):
Now you live here like, did you always want to
leave Germany? Was that part of the plan? Like how
did this eventuate?
Speaker 5 (10:14):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (10:14):
I think it's all because my mom always she always
wanted to leave East Germany. That's how I grew up.
So it was always Obviously the regime was pretty tough,
so I only heard vispers here and there. They weren't
obviously openly talking about, but traveling was always something that
my mom wanted, and she always like she was considering
a fleeing across the border, but she was too worried
(10:35):
about me because obviously people were killed doing that. So
I kind of always felt like I was holding her back.
And then when she passed, and obviously I kind of
took that on and then I've been yeah, living the dream.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
Let's go. Mom. I'm sure she's somewhere so proud of you,
Like she's just like, look at my baby go. She
is so proud. I love that. Tell me a bit more, like,
what are your money goals. You've been through a lot.
You went through a messy divorce and a draining custody battle.
You now have fifty to fifty custody with your kids,
which is a brilliant outcome. Talk to me about what
(11:10):
your big money goals are now.
Speaker 4 (11:11):
The biggest goal is obviously paying do under mortgage as
fast as I can, because I last year just I
beg bored and stealed and stole and got my foot
in the door with a little apartment, which I'm so happy.
I was like just at the right spot at the
right time, which very really happens. So I want to
pay that down a bit faster because obviously thirty years
(11:32):
is quite daunting in my age. And then my daughter
really really wants to go to Japan, so trying to
see if I can make that happen somehow.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
I love that. How old is your daughter?
Speaker 4 (11:45):
Ten?
Speaker 2 (11:45):
Oh my goodness, So she's standing, She's like, mom, that's
my dream.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
Yeah. She's a huge Harry Potter fan. So she wants
to go to Harry Potter World.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Oh my goodness. I love this for her. So we're
hopefully going on a holidays Japan, and we are going
to pay down our more gage. Let's go to a
really quick break because on the flip side, I have
a lot of questions and I feel like you have
a lot of insights. So guys don't go anywhere, all right,
money dirist, We are back. I want to talk a
(12:14):
little bit more about this mortgage. You said you begged,
your borrowed, your stole so that you could get into
your first like apartment on your own. I know this
isn't your first property purchase, but it's like you've done
this on your own, so that feels a little bit different.
How did you manage that? Like you said, money was
really hard. Obviously you realized quite quickly it wasn't really
(12:35):
about how much you earned, but how you were using it.
How did you kind of come to that? I guess
conclusion that you were like, I've got to do something
about this because I need to buy an apartment. How
does that happen? Because, like, I think lots of us
want that.
Speaker 4 (12:46):
What to be honest, covid an interest rate rises, right.
I never really wanted to own Kuzbeck and Germany. You
grow up as a renter. It's a common thing. People
you know, only really buy when they're ridge. So when
we bought our house with my ex husband, I was
quite opposed to it. So when I got rid of
the properties, I was also quite happy about it. But
then renting just became a drama. I mean I moved
(13:11):
like almost every year with my children, so every year
we had to pack up and move into another house.
And then we finally had a house where we could
stay in for two years in a row, and then
they janked up the rent from four fifty to six fifty,
like from one year to the other, and there was
just there's no budget for that, like it's just impossible.
So six fifty a week is just yeah, I just
(13:34):
can't do it. So I kind of was faced with, yeah,
having to make a decision, and then obviously realizing that
in Australia, you know, you were talking about that one
of your other podcasts, retirement is all laid out like
it's based on you owning a property. So I thought
it's now or never, and I reached out to a broker.
(13:54):
Listening to You Love Get It, Yeah, so reached out
to a broker and then yeah, we went with Keystar.
So I had very very little deposit, but yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Yeah, So the key Start program means that single parents
can actually get in for as little as a two
percent deposit, which is actually so cool. But the process is,
I won't say it's super complex, but you usually need
a broker to be able to help you through the
process and apply for it because there are only a
certain amount of slots every six months that are available.
(14:24):
That is so cool that you got in on that, Like,
that makes me so happy that you're in the best
possible position. So talk to me about investing. Have you
got superannuation? If so, what's the plan there?
Speaker 4 (14:34):
Yeah, so I do have SUPER. My company pays twelve percent,
so they've always been on a bit of a higher rate.
But obviously I've only started in two thousand and seven,
so I'm a bit behind the eight bore once again,
listening to your podcast. I've seen a financial advisor at
the start of the year, so he's just working all
of this out. He's already told me that I need
(14:56):
to swap supers, so I have a meeting with him
next week and he's got a bit of an action
plan for me swapping supers and building the wealth a
bit more.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
You are absolutely on top of this. I feel like
these are all the things that I would have said. Look,
if you're feeling under convent, go and see a financial advisor.
You know, if you want to get in your first home,
we could maybe get a deposit for like two percent.
You've done it all. You don't even need cheese on
the money anymore. You're just flying. I'm obsessed. So talk
to me about this homeland that you've got. How much
debt are you in? Like? What did you purchase your
(15:26):
home for?
Speaker 4 (15:27):
Yeah? So I was once again super super lucky.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
So no, you weren't lucky. You were not lucky. Luck
doesn't come into this. You worked hard for this.
Speaker 4 (15:36):
I bought it for four hundred and fifty one thousand.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Dollars, yes, very specific.
Speaker 4 (15:42):
Yeah, so it was advertised for four hundred and fifty
and then we agreed on four fifty, and then the
real estate lady ring, wee, can we make it five
for one? I was like, yeah, no worth and then
my broker actually reached out. So I purchased it in
July through keystat and then in November, totally unexpected, my
broker called me and he goes, did you know you
(16:02):
can refinance? And I said what already? Like are you serious? Yeah?
So the property went up in value so fast that
I actually had equity enough in it that I could refinance.
So in November, just before Christmas, I refinanced. So now
my mortgage is at four hundred and thirty four for
thirty years.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Oh look at you go. I adore that for you,
and I love that you've got a proactive broker because
so many people they'll go see your mortgage broker and
then they'll never hear from him again because the loans
sat and forget. I love that he called you up
and was like, okay, cool. So this is going to
put you in an even better position. Like he sounds great,
You keep him. You make sure that you look after
him so that he keeps broking for you for the
(16:43):
rest of ever. Talk to me about what the plan
there is. You're trying to smash down that mortgage. What
does that look like?
Speaker 4 (16:50):
Yeah, so according to the financial advisor, I've got to
obviously op my payments, so I'm just waiting to catch
up with them. My plan was always to pay more
than what I need interest rate vise, but I also
have an offset account, so to be honest, I'm a
little bit lost since I got the offset accounts because
now I've got all my money going into the offset account.
(17:12):
I no longer have all the different accounts like I
used to. So probably once I've spoken to my financial
advisor next week, I'm probably going to have to restructure
how I'm doing everything.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
You can call your mortgage broker and ask about how
many offset accounts you can have. Some mortgages will only
allow you to have one. But I've got my fingers
crossed so that if you call your mortgage broker, he
might say, look, you can have as many offset accounts
as you want, and then you could have lots of
different accounts to separate it out, because that might actually
and you could do that before you see your financial
(17:45):
advisor and just inquire and say, well, could I have
more offset accounts for the same mortgage, because then you've
just got a lot of them. You can have that clarity,
you can do that planning, but at least all of
those dollars are offsetting your mortgage, which is what we
want right want to make sure that our money is
working really hard for us. But often you can actually
have more than one, which might actually work for you.
Speaker 4 (18:06):
Oh yes, Oh that sounds great. I definitely enquire about that.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
Yeah, definitely give him a buzz and say, excuse me.
I was talking to a friend and she said that
maybe I could have more than one and that might
actually help. But it's frustrating when you start to feel
a little bit out of control of your money because
it sounds like you're trying to do the right thing
by like loading up your offset, but then you're like
everything's all together and there's no clarity. So tell me,
how do you usually manage your finances?
Speaker 4 (18:30):
Yeah, So I always thought I was good with money
because I attract everything. I have this spreadsheet and I
still have it, and every time I spend something, I
put it in the spreadsheet. But I just really haven't
gotten the hang of what budgeting actually means. So I
never overspent, but I never stick to a budget either.
So I just basically I'm just tracking. So that's what
(18:52):
I'm trying to learn by listening to your podcast and
reading your books is just trying to rethink, trying to
retrain myself on how I managed that.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
So how did you come to that conclusion? Because you
said I realized the problem wasn't my income, it was
how I used it. And obviously if you hadn't been
introduced to Shees on the Money or anything like that before,
were you just like this is a problem, Like I've
got good money, but like it's not working, or like,
how did you come to the conclusion that you were like,
something's not right.
Speaker 4 (19:20):
Yeah. So it was basically whenever I wanted to go
on a holiday or whenever, you know, something a big
purchase came up. I was able to get that money
together by saving and being you know, stingy, and so
I never really had issues with overspending. But I never
ever had anything left over. So actually it was when
my next bonus payment came up. So every March I
(19:42):
get bonus payments. And then I realized, listen, I've been
earning all this money, but I at the end, I
don't actually have anything to show for. I'm nearly forty five,
and I'm living paycheck to paycheck. I mean, I don't
live bad, but I also don't live exorbitant like I.
You know, it's kind of obviously lifestyle creep and whatnot.
But I had to dial that back now with the
(20:03):
mortgage and everything. But somehow when we went out with friends,
you know, and the extra coffee here and the extra
take out there, kind of go like, oh, it's actually
a lot of money. So I didn't really have anything
to fall back on. And I kind of realized now
with my age and having two children, I kind of
have to start looking at what is there when I
don't have an income?
Speaker 2 (20:24):
Did you find that quite confronting when you're like, oh, oh, yes, yeah,
because that can be really hard, right you think, oh,
I'm you know, nearly forty five, what am I doing?
Like that can feel terrible. It's not terrible, but it
feels that way.
Speaker 4 (20:36):
Yeah. Yeah. Or when I went to Germany to ask
for money for the lawyer I my stepdad. He was saying,
you're really bad at money, and I was like, what
do you mean? I'm really bad at money? You know,
I can afford everything I want. I earn a lot.
I work hard. Sometimes I have two or three jobs
at the same time, so I can afford everything I
want to afford. So I kind of like shuckled and
I'm like, yeah, whatever. You know, I obviously didn't plan
(20:59):
on going to court fight for my children, you know,
so I kind of really didn't understand. But you know,
he's been investing and he's been looking after his money,
which I haven't been. So now I've walked actually past
your book at the bookstore and it was on special,
so I grabbed it a money when exactly, and then
I started reading it and you talk about the money
(21:20):
story and it was so confronting for me. I couldn't
actually keep reading. I had to like put it away
because it triggered me.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
I'm sorry, but it's so important for you not understand.
Speaker 4 (21:29):
Yeah, so that's kind of where, you know, I'm just slowly,
step by step, I'm just realizing the way I looked
at money and the way I looked at what it
actually means was completely wrong. So I'm just trying to
retrain that.
Speaker 2 (21:42):
It wasn't wrong, it just wasn't what you wanted to be.
And I think that you need to give yourself a
lot of grace because with what you've gone through in life,
to have now moved yourself to Australia and be earning
what you're earning, like that's incredible. Like that is so incredible,
Like that is for a lot of people. I'm assuming
(22:03):
they're still in East Germany, still living the same type
of lifestyle still, you know, scrimping and trying to save it,
and you're here going no, no, no, I want better
for me, I want better for my kids. Like that
is iconic behavior Like that is exactly what we want
to see. And yes, we weren't doing what we wanted
to before but you didn't have the tools and resources
that you had right now. You didn't have that before.
(22:24):
You weren't doing the wrong thing. You just didn't know
what the thing was that you wanted to do. And
I think that's sometimes we need to start using language
that's not crucifying past you, because like if I go
back any point in time, right, like I go back
to Money direst and you're thirty, I go back to
you when you're twenty five and I spoke to you,
I think that you would have been doing the best
that you could, right Like, you would have been doing
(22:45):
the best that you could with the tools and the
resources that you had, but you just didn't know any different.
So like, we're not being mean to her. She did
the best that she could and now she's doing even better.
She's thriving now, and that's good. But I don't think
we want to be harsh on ourselves in the like,
oh I was doing the wrong thing. You weren't doing
the wrong thing. We'll just trying our hardest. We just
didn't have direction, and now we do, and that is
(23:06):
very cool. So I'm actually going to set you up,
and I know that you've got a financial Advisor and
you can show them this. But I'm going to set
you up with my Money Masterclass, which is my like
it might be a little bit confronting, so I do
apologize because I do have a lot of videos in
it about money stories and about you coming to terms
with what that means and the difference between your money
values and your money beliefs and stuff like that. So
(23:28):
I'm going to give that to you. But there's a
really beautiful spreadsheet in there that's actually a bit more
like a software program. I've coded the whole thing, and
you just put in what you're spending and it will
spit out what bank accounts, especially based on your offset,
where they need to go, and how much money you're
spending on a weekly basis, and what percentage that looks like,
so that you have complete clarity. And I think that
(23:48):
that's going to really work for you because I can
see you're trying so hard, but like, we just need
another tool, We just need to throw something into the
mix to make it a little bit easier. So once
we've done recording today, I'm going to set you up
with that, But tell me a bit more. I'm so
enamored by your story talk to me. What do you
think your best money habit is? Like growing up in
East Germany, you're going to have to have some good
(24:09):
money habits. Like you said before, I can scrimp, I
can save. I can pull together money. Like I feel
like you're a bit of a wizard.
Speaker 4 (24:17):
Yeah, well I definitely if I have the plant next
year Christmas, I want to go to Germany or whatever
it is, I can save tetal cows come home. You know,
I skip you know, my coffees or whatever it is.
And yeah, definitely, really really good at saving if I
have an immediate goal.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
I love that. And have you got any naughty money habits?
Speaker 4 (24:38):
Yeah, that's sticking to a budget. Really. It's like like
I said, I never really overspend, but I do, Yeah,
live to the max, like I always spend it off.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
I feel like that's a really common thing though, Like
we all feel like, oh, we're not like overspending, But
it's just the consistency of our small purchases that over
time end up adding up. And while you could reduce
your budget and you could be like vee, I love
my coffee and like that's me right, Like, and I've
openly said you can pry my coffee from my cold
(25:07):
dead hands. I will have one every single day, like
I'm not compromising, but there are other things in my
budget that maybe I'm pulling out so that I can
have that, But you might not go ah V coffee. Yes,
it's nice, but like I could just make one at
home and that's absolutely going to work for me, because
different things work for different people. So I think being
aware of it the most important thing. Like I think
(25:28):
all of us and you showed me this before you said, Victoria,
I earn one hundred and fifty three thousand dollars and
that's fantastic. You know exactly what's coming in. But if
I said, well, money, dost how many dollars do you spend?
You couldn't tell me that. And that's okay because like
my money masterclass is going to sort you out, like
I'm gumming for you.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
But it's this.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Idea that we know exactly what's coming in, but we
can't go, oh, well, on average, I'm spending X per
week on food and beverage and I'm really happy with that.
It might be like, oh, I don't really know. Sometimes
I get a takeaway, sometimes I don't, like I just
want you to be aware so that we can make
sure that that's in line with our values. Because for
some of us that's a non negotiable. We need our
little arm and croissant, and I'm not going to ever
(26:11):
argue with you. But for some people, they're like, oh,
I'm wasting my money. That's not a value to me.
I want to plan a holiday, or I want to
go to Germany, or I want to go to Japan
with my daughter, and this is more important. And I
think that sometimes we just need our goals to be
put really clearly in front of us and what sacrifices
need to be made to get there. I just know
that you're on the path. Like you said, You've got
(26:32):
this appointment with your financial advisor next week, You've bought
your house recently. I just think that you're on the
trajectory of going up. And it would be a privilege
if in like twelve months, I can get you back
on the show and be like, wait, where are you
at what's going on? Because I just know that you're
going to thrive. Like your forties, they're going to be
the best years of your life. I just know it.
Speaker 4 (26:49):
Oh, thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
I appreciate that I know it, so talk to me.
I just feel like a C minus girl. What are
you talking about? Like that's so unnecessarily harsh. You're not
a C minus. You've got two kids. You fought tooth
and nail to make sure that you get fifty to
fifty custody with them. You know what you want to
achieve for them. You've just gone above and beyond to
(27:11):
purchase your first home to give them that financial security.
You're talking about making sure that you know you're broker,
Like your broker is really good. You're talking to a
financial advisor. You're like, oh, I know, I've got super
probably a little bit behind because I only started contributing
in two thousand and seven, but I'm going to be
on top of this. Like you are so far ahead
of literally everybody else your age, Like so many people
(27:33):
in their mid forties still have their head in the sand.
They're literally like, I don't want to think about it.
It's too overwhelming. This is not for me, and that's okay,
But like, your way ahead of the game. Do you
think after we've had a chat and I've just talked
to you about, you know, all these habits and things
that you're doing. Do you think that you would grade
that person a C minus.
Speaker 4 (27:51):
I don't know. I'm generally very hard. Maybe a C plus.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
That's the Germany in you. I feel like, quite like
this is how it's going to be.
Speaker 4 (27:59):
Yeah, I'm definitely working towards it. I mean, once I
set my mind to something, I definitely I've one letter go,
that's for sure.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
I love that. What do you think it would take
for you in your financial life for you to say, oh,
I'm a B or Victoria, I'm headed towards an A
like what would that look like?
Speaker 4 (28:15):
I think once I feel a little bit more in
control of what's going out, rather than just recording it,
actually mindfully spending it and keeping track of it in
a way that I can see I'm building wealth. So
I'm quite hopeful that you know within the next yeah,
six to twelve months, that things will change.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
I just know they will. And I think that that's
one of the most common misconceptions about budgeting that people go, well,
I do budget because I track everything that I spend,
and it's not so much about tracking but more about
the flow of money and more about Okay, well, this
amount is allocated for this, and I'm reaching my goals
and feeling like I'm moving forward. Just by tracking doesn't
(28:58):
mean you feel like you're making progress. So it's about
putting that progress first and then working towards it, as
opposed to just like looking at what was It's like
the difference between accounting and financial advice. And I was
having this conversation the other day and I promise it
will make sense in a second, but it's like comparing
those two professions. So an accountant, they look at everything
(29:18):
that happened in the past, but a financial advisor is
looking at everything that's going to happen in the future.
So they're making predictions. They're like, oh, if you put
here and here in place in the future, it'll look
like this, whereas an accountant, it's going to go, oh,
I can do your tax return and look at what
you've spent. That's not what's going to create wealth. And
I think so often when we're budgeting and when we're
(29:38):
trying to get our finances together, we default to an
accountant's mindset and we just go, well, one plus one
equals too, and we need to see what happened in
the past. But I'm very much of the opinion that
we need to forget what happened. Then, like we're not
going to crucify ourselves. You are wasting your energy if
you're saying, oh, I wasn't good at money or I
didn't know what we don't care. I don't care. I
don't want to know how bad you were at things.
(29:59):
That does and help us. I want to know about
your grand plans. I want to know about the future.
So we need to go from this accountant mindset to
a financial advisor mindset. And that's very hard because and
I'm not saying their job is easier. Do not come
for me, guys, but their job is a little bit
clearer because they have really set numbers. I can see
exactly what you spent on coffee, I can see exactly
what you spent on your travel. I can see exactly
(30:21):
what you spent, whereas the financial advisor, they're predicting, and
that's a little bit more hard for us to comprehend.
So we need to step into that mindset, and that's
what's going to create growth. That's what's going to give
us the clarity that we deserve to create the life
that we want. And I feel like you're in the
middle of that like you've been doing the accountant thing
of track track tracking, and now you're about to literally
(30:43):
next week go see your financial advisor, and now it's
going to be about growth. I'm just so excited for you.
I think you've got the brightest future and you are
so delightful, and I'm just so excited that we get
to keep you here in Australia. Like what a privilege.
Thank you so much money, Dirist. It has been absolutely
gorgeous getting to know you. I feel like you've gone
through a lot, from growing up in East Germany, your
(31:04):
mom passing away when you were twelve, Like even you're
just saying, oh, yes, I met my biological dad at
my mom's funeral. My goodness. Now you've got two beautiful
kids of your own and you're living on the other
side of the world, Like life is crazy, and I
just I feel like you are definitely embracing it in
the right way.
Speaker 4 (31:22):
Yeah, definitely, you never know what's around a corner. That's
definitely that life has shown me.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
You have proven that, my love. Thank you so much
for joining us. I know the community is absolutely going
to be obsessed with this episode because I am.
Speaker 4 (31:34):
Thank you so so much for having me.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
If I shared or She's on the Money is general
in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's
on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should
not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision.
If you do choose to buy a financial product.
Speaker 5 (31:58):
Read the PDS TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice.
Speaker 2 (32:01):
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Speaker 5 (32:03):
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(00:22):
beautiful friends, we gather on the lands of the Aboriginal people.
We thank acknowledge and respect the Abiginal people's land that
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podcast acknowledges culture, country, community and connections, bringing you the tools,
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Speaker 2 (00:44):
She's on the Money.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
She's on the Money.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast
that let you be pervy about other people's money habits
for educational purposes, of course. Welcome back to another one
of our money drays where I get the absolute pleasure
of sitting down and having a chat with one of
our beautiful She's on the Money. Community members all about
their journey. Let's jump straight into it, because this week
I got a message and it sounded exactly like this, Dear,
(01:29):
She's on the money. I'm nearly forty five, and for
most of my life I thought I was fine with money.
I earned well, paid the bills, even traveled, but I
never built any real wealth. Growing up in East Germany
under socialism, I believed money came to people on the
right side of the wall. After a messy divorce and
a draining custody battle, I hit financial rock bottom. It
(01:53):
still took years and stumbling across She's on the Money
before I realized the problem wasn't my income, it was
how I used it. I'm finally changing my habits, and
for the first time, I feel like I am in
control money. Darrist, Welcome to the show. This whole story
has so many facets. I don't know if we're going
to have enough time to get into all of this today.
(02:14):
Like that's a lot. Yeah, Hi, welcome to the show.
I'm so excited to talk to you before we dive
completely in. Can you tell me what grade would you
give your money habits if I asked you to give
them a grade from a through to f.
Speaker 4 (02:27):
Oh my god, I really thought long and hard about it,
but I would say maybe a C minus.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
A C minus. All right, well, I think we can
learn a little bit more about that in the next
few minutes. Talk to me. I want to know, tell
me a bit about your money's story.
Speaker 4 (02:42):
Yeah, so, like I alluded, originally, I am originally from
East Germany, and yeah, it was always I don't know.
As a kid, I always thought everything at the other
side of the wall, everything is bigger, shinier. You just
got to get over there and life will be great.
And my mum, she was a mom. I'm an only child.
She worked really, really hard, so my perception of money
(03:06):
was the harder you work, the more you're going to earn,
and that's how you make it in life.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Really, it sounds like your mom was an icon.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
Yeah. She unfortunately passed away when I was twelve.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
So, my goodness, that's another layer to the complex money story.
That would have been terrible, especially if you only had
a single mom.
Speaker 4 (03:26):
Yeah. Yeah, we had just moved over to West Germany.
So she married a West German who was rich, So
that influenced my What was so I thought that he
was rich, just you know, he had money all the time,
and we went on holidays all of a sudden. So
but yeah, it was, yeah, very strange time of my life.
I was, like I said, only twelve years old, and
(03:49):
I met my biological father at my mom's funeral and
ended up moving in with him and his wife back
to East Germany, deep deep East. And yeah, it's just
definitely interesting.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Oh my goodness, meeting your biological dad at your mum's funeral, Like, girl,
that is fifty layers of trauma like that would have
been just like an absolute whirlwind. And at twelve you're
about to go through puberty like that would have been
such challenging time for you. And to come through all
of that and be the icon that you are today,
(04:23):
You're incredible. I am already obsessed with you.
Speaker 4 (04:26):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
So tell me a little bit more about what happened
once you became an adult. So you said went through
a messy divorce, Like what was that? Like, how did
that eventuate?
Speaker 4 (04:37):
Yeah? Yeah, So I always say my thirties are kind
of like down the drain. So I got married when
I was thirty and then had my first child, and
then shortly there after my second. But it was an
abuse of relationship. So eventually, towards the end of my thirties,
I finally like, yes, something happened, and I just, yeah,
decided to leave. And because it was such a toxic relationship,
(05:00):
I basically left everything behind. We were owning two properties
at the time, because originally we were living in Alo
Springs for six years and we had a house there,
and then we moved over to the West Coast and
we bought our second house when I was pregnant with
my daughter, my second child. So eventually I was like
(05:20):
I had enough, I left and I kind of just
gave everything up. We sold the property in Alo Springs
at a loss, and the property in Wi he held on,
so he's still owning that. But yeah, like I said,
I walked away with nothing. And then he took me
to court to fight for the children. So that cost
(05:40):
me a lot of money. Obviously, the lawyer, I was
fifteen thousand dollars, And like I said, I always thought
I was good with money, and I was able to
sustain the lawyer for fair bit. But then eventually I
had to go home to Germany and walk around and
kind of like beg for a bit of money and
a bit support, but yeah, eventually came to an agreement
(06:01):
and the kids are now fifty to fifty, so that's good.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
Yeah, wow, oh my goodness. I feel like it couldn't
get worse. And then you're like, yep, and it was
actually terrible and it walked away with nothing but like
good girl walking away from that. So many people don't
and that's such a hard thing to do. I'm genuinely
so ex Like, I know you said your thirties are
down the drain. I think we actually just learned a
lot during that period, and now you're going to thrive
(06:24):
in your forties. Like forties are the new thirties anyway, right,
Like that's the plan and we're just starting from scratch.
Tell me, how did you end up in Australia? How
were we so lucky to get you?
Speaker 4 (06:34):
Yeah? So I actually came to Australia in two thousand
and seven, so I only came on a work on
holiday visa. So my ideal life was always to travel
as much as possible, So wherever I went, I also
worked because that's the cheapest way of travel, am my eyes.
So I also went to America for two years. If
they're actually I was just listening to the other monaydayya.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
Oh the San Francisco one. Yes, yes, that was a goodie.
Speaker 4 (07:01):
Yeah. Yeah, So I lived in San Francisco for two years,
which was great, and then came back to Germany. But
then Germany is really really small after having lived in
San Francisco for two years, so then, yeah, I went
to Australia on a work on holiday visa. I worked
as a tour guide, but then I just fell in
love with the country and worked really hard. I got
a working visa luckily, so that's how I came to
(07:22):
stay and then met my husband and yeah, rest is history.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
And ended up in Alice Springs. Alice Springs is a
very rogue choice when you said just before, oh, Germany
was really small, like girl, I don't know how to
tell you, but Alice Springs is a little bit smaller.
Speaker 4 (07:41):
Actually, it was not the plan. So the plan. I
always had the job. I was looking for a job
before I left Germany, so I did have the tour
guiding job and Alice Springs before I left, so I
needed their security, but that was only meant to be
a six months stay and then I was going to
travel for you know, another two to four months and
then go back to my job that I had. I
(08:02):
just basically took a spatical in Germany. But yeah, Ellie Springs,
it's so beautiful. I mean, unfortunately not anymore as much
as it was back then. So I ended up living
there for six years, and I also lived a year
at the Rock. It's just that will always be Traue
Australia for me.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
Yeah, no, it's so beautiful.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
Don't get me wrong. Now that I live at the
West Coast close to the beach, I mean I'm like
five minutes down from the beach. That's obviously lifestyle like right.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
There, that's a good deal. And growing up in East Germany,
I bet you never thought that you would live five
minutes from a beach.
Speaker 4 (08:36):
Oh definitely not, No, definitely not.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
That's crazy even though you've been through so much, Like
I feel like you've got this like dreamy little lifestyle now,
like that's beautiful.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (08:47):
No, I'm definitely very fortunate. I've got two beautiful kids,
that's and yeah where I live and yeah, I definitely
can't complain.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
But do so tell me you mentioned before like I
was a travel guide. What do you do for work
now and how much money.
Speaker 4 (08:59):
Do you. So I'm an operations manager at the airport. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
Cool.
Speaker 4 (09:04):
So I've got a base wage of one hundred and
thirty nine one hundred.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
That's so good.
Speaker 4 (09:11):
Yeah, yeah, it's a great Actually, my base pay plus
invalances is like at one hundred and fifty three thousand,
so it's yeah, it's it's fantastic. And then once a
year I get a bonus as well, a twelve percent bonus.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
Excuse me, that is so good. So one fifty three
plus some bonuses here and there, like that means that
we can build some serious like financial freedom. I mean,
so you think, but oh absolutely absolutely. You are still
a baby. You are still young. You said you're forty four, right,
We've got so much time on our side. Talk to
(09:43):
me about how you got into that, because like, I
don't know, I just I love this idea of a journey,
you being so young and having been through so much
to then being an ops manager at an airport in Australia,
Like that's kind of crazy to think that twelve year
old you would move back to East Germany, didn't know
what was going on, like very tumultuous period of your life.
(10:07):
Now you live here like, did you always want to
leave Germany? Was that part of the plan? Like how
did this eventuate?
Speaker 5 (10:14):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (10:14):
I think it's all because my mom always she always
wanted to leave East Germany. That's how I grew up.
So it was always Obviously the regime was pretty tough,
so I only heard vispers here and there. They weren't
obviously openly talking about, but traveling was always something that
my mom wanted, and she always like she was considering
a fleeing across the border, but she was too worried
(10:35):
about me because obviously people were killed doing that. So
I kind of always felt like I was holding her back.
And then when she passed, and obviously I kind of
took that on and then I've been yeah, living the dream.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
Let's go. Mom. I'm sure she's somewhere so proud of you,
Like she's just like, look at my baby go. She
is so proud. I love that. Tell me a bit more, like,
what are your money goals. You've been through a lot.
You went through a messy divorce and a draining custody battle.
You now have fifty to fifty custody with your kids,
which is a brilliant outcome. Talk to me about what
(11:10):
your big money goals are now.
Speaker 4 (11:11):
The biggest goal is obviously paying do under mortgage as
fast as I can, because I last year just I
beg bored and stealed and stole and got my foot
in the door with a little apartment, which I'm so happy.
I was like just at the right spot at the
right time, which very really happens. So I want to
pay that down a bit faster because obviously thirty years
(11:32):
is quite daunting in my age. And then my daughter
really really wants to go to Japan, so trying to
see if I can make that happen somehow.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
I love that. How old is your daughter?
Speaker 4 (11:45):
Ten?
Speaker 2 (11:45):
Oh my goodness, So she's standing, She's like, mom, that's
my dream.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
Yeah. She's a huge Harry Potter fan. So she wants
to go to Harry Potter World.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Oh my goodness. I love this for her. So we're
hopefully going on a holidays Japan, and we are going
to pay down our more gage. Let's go to a
really quick break because on the flip side, I have
a lot of questions and I feel like you have
a lot of insights. So guys don't go anywhere, all right,
money dirist, We are back. I want to talk a
(12:14):
little bit more about this mortgage. You said you begged,
your borrowed, your stole so that you could get into
your first like apartment on your own. I know this
isn't your first property purchase, but it's like you've done
this on your own, so that feels a little bit different.
How did you manage that? Like you said, money was
really hard. Obviously you realized quite quickly it wasn't really
(12:35):
about how much you earned, but how you were using it.
How did you kind of come to that? I guess
conclusion that you were like, I've got to do something
about this because I need to buy an apartment. How
does that happen? Because, like, I think lots of us
want that.
Speaker 4 (12:46):
What to be honest, covid an interest rate rises, right.
I never really wanted to own Kuzbeck and Germany. You
grow up as a renter. It's a common thing. People
you know, only really buy when they're ridge. So when
we bought our house with my ex husband, I was
quite opposed to it. So when I got rid of
the properties, I was also quite happy about it. But
then renting just became a drama. I mean I moved
(13:11):
like almost every year with my children, so every year
we had to pack up and move into another house.
And then we finally had a house where we could
stay in for two years in a row, and then
they janked up the rent from four fifty to six fifty,
like from one year to the other, and there was
just there's no budget for that, like it's just impossible.
So six fifty a week is just yeah, I just
(13:34):
can't do it. So I kind of was faced with, yeah,
having to make a decision, and then obviously realizing that
in Australia, you know, you were talking about that one
of your other podcasts, retirement is all laid out like
it's based on you owning a property. So I thought
it's now or never, and I reached out to a broker.
(13:54):
Listening to You Love Get It, Yeah, so reached out
to a broker and then yeah, we went with Keystar.
So I had very very little deposit, but yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Yeah, So the key Start program means that single parents
can actually get in for as little as a two
percent deposit, which is actually so cool. But the process is,
I won't say it's super complex, but you usually need
a broker to be able to help you through the
process and apply for it because there are only a
certain amount of slots every six months that are available.
(14:24):
That is so cool that you got in on that, Like,
that makes me so happy that you're in the best
possible position. So talk to me about investing. Have you
got superannuation? If so, what's the plan there?
Speaker 4 (14:34):
Yeah, so I do have SUPER. My company pays twelve percent,
so they've always been on a bit of a higher rate.
But obviously I've only started in two thousand and seven,
so I'm a bit behind the eight bore once again,
listening to your podcast. I've seen a financial advisor at
the start of the year, so he's just working all
of this out. He's already told me that I need
(14:56):
to swap supers, so I have a meeting with him
next week and he's got a bit of an action
plan for me swapping supers and building the wealth a
bit more.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
You are absolutely on top of this. I feel like
these are all the things that I would have said. Look,
if you're feeling under convent, go and see a financial advisor.
You know, if you want to get in your first home,
we could maybe get a deposit for like two percent.
You've done it all. You don't even need cheese on
the money anymore. You're just flying. I'm obsessed. So talk
to me about this homeland that you've got. How much
debt are you in? Like? What did you purchase your
(15:26):
home for?
Speaker 4 (15:27):
Yeah? So I was once again super super lucky.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
So no, you weren't lucky. You were not lucky. Luck
doesn't come into this. You worked hard for this.
Speaker 4 (15:36):
I bought it for four hundred and fifty one thousand.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Dollars, yes, very specific.
Speaker 4 (15:42):
Yeah, so it was advertised for four hundred and fifty
and then we agreed on four fifty, and then the
real estate lady ring, wee, can we make it five
for one? I was like, yeah, no worth and then
my broker actually reached out. So I purchased it in
July through keystat and then in November, totally unexpected, my
broker called me and he goes, did you know you
(16:02):
can refinance? And I said what already? Like are you serious? Yeah?
So the property went up in value so fast that
I actually had equity enough in it that I could refinance.
So in November, just before Christmas, I refinanced. So now
my mortgage is at four hundred and thirty four for
thirty years.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Oh look at you go. I adore that for you,
and I love that you've got a proactive broker because
so many people they'll go see your mortgage broker and
then they'll never hear from him again because the loans
sat and forget. I love that he called you up
and was like, okay, cool. So this is going to
put you in an even better position. Like he sounds great,
You keep him. You make sure that you look after
him so that he keeps broking for you for the
(16:43):
rest of ever. Talk to me about what the plan
there is. You're trying to smash down that mortgage. What
does that look like?
Speaker 4 (16:50):
Yeah, so according to the financial advisor, I've got to
obviously op my payments, so I'm just waiting to catch
up with them. My plan was always to pay more
than what I need interest rate vise, but I also
have an offset account, so to be honest, I'm a
little bit lost since I got the offset accounts because
now I've got all my money going into the offset account.
(17:12):
I no longer have all the different accounts like I
used to. So probably once I've spoken to my financial
advisor next week, I'm probably going to have to restructure
how I'm doing everything.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
You can call your mortgage broker and ask about how
many offset accounts you can have. Some mortgages will only
allow you to have one. But I've got my fingers
crossed so that if you call your mortgage broker, he
might say, look, you can have as many offset accounts
as you want, and then you could have lots of
different accounts to separate it out, because that might actually
and you could do that before you see your financial
(17:45):
advisor and just inquire and say, well, could I have
more offset accounts for the same mortgage, because then you've
just got a lot of them. You can have that clarity,
you can do that planning, but at least all of
those dollars are offsetting your mortgage, which is what we
want right want to make sure that our money is
working really hard for us. But often you can actually
have more than one, which might actually work for you.
Speaker 4 (18:06):
Oh yes, Oh that sounds great. I definitely enquire about that.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
Yeah, definitely give him a buzz and say, excuse me.
I was talking to a friend and she said that
maybe I could have more than one and that might
actually help. But it's frustrating when you start to feel
a little bit out of control of your money because
it sounds like you're trying to do the right thing
by like loading up your offset, but then you're like
everything's all together and there's no clarity. So tell me,
how do you usually manage your finances?
Speaker 4 (18:30):
Yeah, So I always thought I was good with money
because I attract everything. I have this spreadsheet and I
still have it, and every time I spend something, I
put it in the spreadsheet. But I just really haven't
gotten the hang of what budgeting actually means. So I
never overspent, but I never stick to a budget either.
So I just basically I'm just tracking. So that's what
(18:52):
I'm trying to learn by listening to your podcast and
reading your books is just trying to rethink, trying to
retrain myself on how I managed that.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
So how did you come to that conclusion? Because you
said I realized the problem wasn't my income, it was
how I used it. And obviously if you hadn't been
introduced to Shees on the Money or anything like that before,
were you just like this is a problem, Like I've
got good money, but like it's not working, or like,
how did you come to the conclusion that you were like,
something's not right.
Speaker 4 (19:20):
Yeah. So it was basically whenever I wanted to go
on a holiday or whenever, you know, something a big
purchase came up. I was able to get that money
together by saving and being you know, stingy, and so
I never really had issues with overspending. But I never
ever had anything left over. So actually it was when
my next bonus payment came up. So every March I
(19:42):
get bonus payments. And then I realized, listen, I've been
earning all this money, but I at the end, I
don't actually have anything to show for. I'm nearly forty five,
and I'm living paycheck to paycheck. I mean, I don't
live bad, but I also don't live exorbitant like I.
You know, it's kind of obviously lifestyle creep and whatnot.
But I had to dial that back now with the
(20:03):
mortgage and everything. But somehow when we went out with friends,
you know, and the extra coffee here and the extra
take out there, kind of go like, oh, it's actually
a lot of money. So I didn't really have anything
to fall back on. And I kind of realized now
with my age and having two children, I kind of
have to start looking at what is there when I
don't have an income?
Speaker 2 (20:24):
Did you find that quite confronting when you're like, oh, oh, yes, yeah,
because that can be really hard, right you think, oh,
I'm you know, nearly forty five, what am I doing?
Like that can feel terrible. It's not terrible, but it
feels that way.
Speaker 4 (20:36):
Yeah. Yeah. Or when I went to Germany to ask
for money for the lawyer I my stepdad. He was saying,
you're really bad at money, and I was like, what
do you mean? I'm really bad at money? You know,
I can afford everything I want. I earn a lot.
I work hard. Sometimes I have two or three jobs
at the same time, so I can afford everything I
want to afford. So I kind of like shuckled and
I'm like, yeah, whatever. You know, I obviously didn't plan
(20:59):
on going to court fight for my children, you know,
so I kind of really didn't understand. But you know,
he's been investing and he's been looking after his money,
which I haven't been. So now I've walked actually past
your book at the bookstore and it was on special,
so I grabbed it a money when exactly, and then
I started reading it and you talk about the money
(21:20):
story and it was so confronting for me. I couldn't
actually keep reading. I had to like put it away
because it triggered me.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
I'm sorry, but it's so important for you not understand.
Speaker 4 (21:29):
Yeah, so that's kind of where, you know, I'm just slowly,
step by step, I'm just realizing the way I looked
at money and the way I looked at what it
actually means was completely wrong. So I'm just trying to
retrain that.
Speaker 2 (21:42):
It wasn't wrong, it just wasn't what you wanted to be.
And I think that you need to give yourself a
lot of grace because with what you've gone through in life,
to have now moved yourself to Australia and be earning
what you're earning, like that's incredible. Like that is so incredible,
Like that is for a lot of people. I'm assuming
(22:03):
they're still in East Germany, still living the same type
of lifestyle still, you know, scrimping and trying to save it,
and you're here going no, no, no, I want better
for me, I want better for my kids. Like that
is iconic behavior Like that is exactly what we want
to see. And yes, we weren't doing what we wanted
to before but you didn't have the tools and resources
that you had right now. You didn't have that before.
(22:24):
You weren't doing the wrong thing. You just didn't know
what the thing was that you wanted to do. And
I think that's sometimes we need to start using language
that's not crucifying past you, because like if I go
back any point in time, right, like I go back
to Money direst and you're thirty, I go back to
you when you're twenty five and I spoke to you,
I think that you would have been doing the best
that you could, right Like, you would have been doing
(22:45):
the best that you could with the tools and the
resources that you had, but you just didn't know any different.
So like, we're not being mean to her. She did
the best that she could and now she's doing even better.
She's thriving now, and that's good. But I don't think
we want to be harsh on ourselves in the like,
oh I was doing the wrong thing. You weren't doing
the wrong thing. We'll just trying our hardest. We just
didn't have direction, and now we do, and that is
(23:06):
very cool. So I'm actually going to set you up,
and I know that you've got a financial Advisor and
you can show them this. But I'm going to set
you up with my Money Masterclass, which is my like
it might be a little bit confronting, so I do
apologize because I do have a lot of videos in
it about money stories and about you coming to terms
with what that means and the difference between your money
values and your money beliefs and stuff like that. So
(23:28):
I'm going to give that to you. But there's a
really beautiful spreadsheet in there that's actually a bit more
like a software program. I've coded the whole thing, and
you just put in what you're spending and it will
spit out what bank accounts, especially based on your offset,
where they need to go, and how much money you're
spending on a weekly basis, and what percentage that looks like,
so that you have complete clarity. And I think that
(23:48):
that's going to really work for you because I can
see you're trying so hard, but like, we just need
another tool, We just need to throw something into the
mix to make it a little bit easier. So once
we've done recording today, I'm going to set you up
with that, But tell me a bit more. I'm so
enamored by your story talk to me. What do you
think your best money habit is? Like growing up in
East Germany, you're going to have to have some good
(24:09):
money habits. Like you said before, I can scrimp, I
can save. I can pull together money. Like I feel
like you're a bit of a wizard.
Speaker 4 (24:17):
Yeah, well I definitely if I have the plant next
year Christmas, I want to go to Germany or whatever
it is, I can save tetal cows come home. You know,
I skip you know, my coffees or whatever it is.
And yeah, definitely, really really good at saving if I
have an immediate goal.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
I love that. And have you got any naughty money habits?
Speaker 4 (24:38):
Yeah, that's sticking to a budget. Really. It's like like
I said, I never really overspend, but I do, Yeah,
live to the max, like I always spend it off.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
I feel like that's a really common thing though, Like
we all feel like, oh, we're not like overspending, But
it's just the consistency of our small purchases that over
time end up adding up. And while you could reduce
your budget and you could be like vee, I love
my coffee and like that's me right, Like, and I've
openly said you can pry my coffee from my cold
(25:07):
dead hands. I will have one every single day, like
I'm not compromising, but there are other things in my
budget that maybe I'm pulling out so that I can
have that, But you might not go ah V coffee. Yes,
it's nice, but like I could just make one at
home and that's absolutely going to work for me, because
different things work for different people. So I think being
aware of it the most important thing. Like I think
(25:28):
all of us and you showed me this before you said, Victoria,
I earn one hundred and fifty three thousand dollars and
that's fantastic. You know exactly what's coming in. But if
I said, well, money, dost how many dollars do you spend?
You couldn't tell me that. And that's okay because like
my money masterclass is going to sort you out, like
I'm gumming for you.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
But it's this.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Idea that we know exactly what's coming in, but we
can't go, oh, well, on average, I'm spending X per
week on food and beverage and I'm really happy with that.
It might be like, oh, I don't really know. Sometimes
I get a takeaway, sometimes I don't, like I just
want you to be aware so that we can make
sure that that's in line with our values. Because for
some of us that's a non negotiable. We need our
little arm and croissant, and I'm not going to ever
(26:11):
argue with you. But for some people, they're like, oh,
I'm wasting my money. That's not a value to me.
I want to plan a holiday, or I want to
go to Germany, or I want to go to Japan
with my daughter, and this is more important. And I
think that sometimes we just need our goals to be
put really clearly in front of us and what sacrifices
need to be made to get there. I just know
that you're on the path. Like you said, You've got
(26:32):
this appointment with your financial advisor next week, You've bought
your house recently. I just think that you're on the
trajectory of going up. And it would be a privilege
if in like twelve months, I can get you back
on the show and be like, wait, where are you
at what's going on? Because I just know that you're
going to thrive. Like your forties, they're going to be
the best years of your life. I just know it.
Speaker 4 (26:49):
Oh, thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
I appreciate that I know it, so talk to me.
I just feel like a C minus girl. What are
you talking about? Like that's so unnecessarily harsh. You're not
a C minus. You've got two kids. You fought tooth
and nail to make sure that you get fifty to
fifty custody with them. You know what you want to
achieve for them. You've just gone above and beyond to
(27:11):
purchase your first home to give them that financial security.
You're talking about making sure that you know you're broker,
Like your broker is really good. You're talking to a
financial advisor. You're like, oh, I know, I've got super
probably a little bit behind because I only started contributing
in two thousand and seven, but I'm going to be
on top of this. Like you are so far ahead
of literally everybody else your age, Like so many people
(27:33):
in their mid forties still have their head in the sand.
They're literally like, I don't want to think about it.
It's too overwhelming. This is not for me, and that's okay,
But like, your way ahead of the game. Do you
think after we've had a chat and I've just talked
to you about, you know, all these habits and things
that you're doing. Do you think that you would grade
that person a C minus.
Speaker 4 (27:51):
I don't know. I'm generally very hard. Maybe a C plus.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
That's the Germany in you. I feel like, quite like
this is how it's going to be.
Speaker 4 (27:59):
Yeah, I'm definitely working towards it. I mean, once I
set my mind to something, I definitely I've one letter go,
that's for sure.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
I love that. What do you think it would take
for you in your financial life for you to say, oh,
I'm a B or Victoria, I'm headed towards an A
like what would that look like?
Speaker 4 (28:15):
I think once I feel a little bit more in
control of what's going out, rather than just recording it,
actually mindfully spending it and keeping track of it in
a way that I can see I'm building wealth. So
I'm quite hopeful that you know within the next yeah,
six to twelve months, that things will change.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
I just know they will. And I think that that's
one of the most common misconceptions about budgeting that people go, well,
I do budget because I track everything that I spend,
and it's not so much about tracking but more about
the flow of money and more about Okay, well, this
amount is allocated for this, and I'm reaching my goals
and feeling like I'm moving forward. Just by tracking doesn't
(28:58):
mean you feel like you're making progress. So it's about
putting that progress first and then working towards it, as
opposed to just like looking at what was It's like
the difference between accounting and financial advice. And I was
having this conversation the other day and I promise it
will make sense in a second, but it's like comparing
those two professions. So an accountant, they look at everything
(29:18):
that happened in the past, but a financial advisor is
looking at everything that's going to happen in the future.
So they're making predictions. They're like, oh, if you put
here and here in place in the future, it'll look
like this, whereas an accountant, it's going to go, oh,
I can do your tax return and look at what
you've spent. That's not what's going to create wealth. And
I think so often when we're budgeting and when we're
(29:38):
trying to get our finances together, we default to an
accountant's mindset and we just go, well, one plus one
equals too, and we need to see what happened in
the past. But I'm very much of the opinion that
we need to forget what happened. Then, like we're not
going to crucify ourselves. You are wasting your energy if
you're saying, oh, I wasn't good at money or I
didn't know what we don't care. I don't care. I
don't want to know how bad you were at things.
(29:59):
That does and help us. I want to know about
your grand plans. I want to know about the future.
So we need to go from this accountant mindset to
a financial advisor mindset. And that's very hard because and
I'm not saying their job is easier. Do not come
for me, guys, but their job is a little bit
clearer because they have really set numbers. I can see
exactly what you spent on coffee, I can see exactly
what you spent on your travel. I can see exactly
(30:21):
what you spent, whereas the financial advisor, they're predicting, and
that's a little bit more hard for us to comprehend.
So we need to step into that mindset, and that's
what's going to create growth. That's what's going to give
us the clarity that we deserve to create the life
that we want. And I feel like you're in the
middle of that like you've been doing the accountant thing
of track track tracking, and now you're about to literally
(30:43):
next week go see your financial advisor, and now it's
going to be about growth. I'm just so excited for you.
I think you've got the brightest future and you are
so delightful, and I'm just so excited that we get
to keep you here in Australia. Like what a privilege.
Thank you so much money, Dirist. It has been absolutely
gorgeous getting to know you. I feel like you've gone
through a lot, from growing up in East Germany, your
(31:04):
mom passing away when you were twelve, Like even you're
just saying, oh, yes, I met my biological dad at
my mom's funeral. My goodness. Now you've got two beautiful
kids of your own and you're living on the other
side of the world, Like life is crazy, and I
just I feel like you are definitely embracing it in
the right way.
Speaker 4 (31:22):
Yeah, definitely, you never know what's around a corner. That's
definitely that life has shown me.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
You have proven that, my love. Thank you so much
for joining us. I know the community is absolutely going
to be obsessed with this episode because I am.
Speaker 4 (31:34):
Thank you so so much for having me.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
If I shared or She's on the Money is general
in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's
on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should
not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision.
If you do choose to buy a financial product.
Speaker 5 (31:58):
Read the PDS TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice.
Speaker 2 (32:01):
Tailored towards your needs.
Speaker 5 (32:03):
Victoria Divine and Sheese on the Money are authorized representatives
of money sherper P T y L t D A
b N three two one six four nine two seven
seven zero eight afs L four five one two eight
nine
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