Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:06):
It's Lucky Lucky, Lucky Lucky Lucky Dip time with Mail
and Monty.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Thanks for joining us.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
To d you greazy cat.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
I need a strategy, you know how that's your thing
that you You're like, that's how I start the podcast
off because it makes me feel comfortable. Yes, but then
I'm left uncomfortable because I don't know what a.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Hello.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Yeah, but that's okay.
Speaker 1 (00:31):
I think that's fine. See, now you get why Rove
had that catchphrase say hi to your mom for me,
because finishing things off and starting things in a forum
like this is challenging.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
It's so hard. Same as with writing.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Yes, how you start right, it's hard, I know. Okay,
So if I sing, which I'm just always going to,
I reckon, you just come in with hardly doodly.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
Yeah all right, I'll just do new I'll do a
new greeting every every week. I have such a funny
little Lucky Dip, although I hate building it up and
then it's like you know when you think it's so
funny at two am, and then you're like, oh, that's fun. Anyway,
I thought this was really funny. I'm thinking well too.
So I saw this Reddit thread about funny lies we
(01:18):
were told as kids that we believed. And it also
made me think how beautiful it is, how innocent kids are,
and how they just believe what.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
You tell me if everything, absolutely everything.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
This is a real fucking misuse of that power. Can
I just say it's you know what it is too.
It's like one of the examples was a parent telling
their kid that the sound of the water going down
the plug hole in the bar was a monster that
was going to get them if they do. And I'm like,
and then you've told the kid off when they're carrying
on when you pull the plug, fuck, you're gaslighting the kid.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
But you do whatever you can because the kid probably
didn't wouldn't get out of the bar. So they're like, oh,
the monster's gonna come. You just do what you can
do to survive in the moment of parenting. And it's
I'm usually wrong, but you do it anyway.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
I know. And if you have two kids, you'll know
the feeling of when you bat them together. And then
there were fights over who was going to sit on
the plug side because they sit on a plug spot,
although that was generally the deeper side the plug side. Yeah,
you're right, yeah, anyway, who cares? Okay, So these are
what people have written in. I was told that the
(02:25):
button on your arm rest on aeroplanes is an eject button.
I found out it reclines your seat embarrassingly late.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
So good.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
My dad told me TV hosts from Live News could
see me, and he said, that's why you never pick
your nose while you're watching TV. You would have been fucked.
Oh fucked.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
I still picked my nose in my car and think
people can't see me.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
I know this is actually genius. When I was a kid,
my dad told me it costs twenty five cents to
change the radio station to keep me from messing with
the radio in his car. I believed it until I
was fourteen.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
These are like the unhinged parenting hacks.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Yeah, yeah they are, but it is annoying. Like when
you've got teenagers and they just start sucking with the music,
my hands off.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
That would not happen as much now. It would be
mighty to be cop put a song on now? Can
I put a song on now? Like it's not changing
the radio, it is changing the song? Or can I
choose the podcast? Or it's always except my Actually, my
oldest has incredible taste in music. But Alo, who's eleven's
(03:35):
listening to NWA?
Speaker 2 (03:37):
Oh my, it's so inappropriate.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
It's so and I'm like, put on the clean versions,
and I'm like, I don't think there are clean versions
about WA.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
I doubt it. My mom used to tell me that
watching a dog who would make you go blind? What?
Oh my god, that matter?
Speaker 1 (03:53):
I remember that time. Just speaking of that, we haven't
spoken about it for a while, when you shit in
your backyard and your dad thought it was the that's
one of my favorite stories of all time.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
Yeah, I'll try and link to that episode if you
want to hear that nerty you got to.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
It's so good good can you please put it in
the show notes. It's my favorite story of all time.
And we've been doing this for like eight years.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
And the shameless way in which I tell it, like
I'm saying I just went down the street and did something,
but it's actually the most fucked up thing you could
ever hear a person do. But anyway, so good. So
you know that old wives tale that they'd say that
if you swallowed a chewy it would take seven seven years,
which is a lie. Okay, it just passes through like
everything else, right, okay. My mother told me and my
(04:40):
sister that if you accidentally swallow chewing gum, you'll die
within seven minutes. In magical How traumatic it was when
my sister was chewing gum when we were about seven years old,
and I jumped out to scare her, accidentally causing her
to swallow it. I bawled my little heart out, apologizing
to her and held her in my arms waiting.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
I heard, Oh, my god, that's evil.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
Isn't that so evil? Trauma?
Speaker 1 (05:07):
Oh, even when your mum would say no, no, that's
not true, you'd still You've gone through all of the
emotions of it.
Speaker 2 (05:15):
Oh my god. In kindergarten, a Janita had only two
or three fingers on one head, terrifying. As a kid,
you're just curious and you ask questions, so I did.
He told me he was cracking his knuckles and they
came right on his hand. It scared me so much
that befo I accidentally cracked a knuckle, I'd carefully examine
my finger to ensure it was still secure. My dad
(05:37):
would crack his knuckles all the time, and I watched
him fear that he was going to do it, and
his fingers would come off. I was probably in the
eighth grade before the fear subsided so good. I told
my kids that Kansas was really black and white like
in the Wizard of.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
Oh my gosh, so good.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
Believe that. How dumb are you? Kids? No kidding. This
is something that will be a bit nostalgic too if
you remember it. But I told my sister that the
piracy warning at the beginning of movies meant that she
wasn't supposed to be watching it and the police were
coming to get her.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Do you You didn't used to go to Bali, but
they would always have DVD shops in Bali, like that
every second shot was a DVD shop. Sam and I
used to go and spend hours at the DVD shops
and like it would be two bucks and you'd get
this full stack. But sometimes you'd get them home and
somebody had sat in the movie theater and filmed the movie.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
And then you'd come back to Australia like, I've got
a copy of bootleg copy or something. Bootleg. Yeah, it
was so shit you couldn't even watch it.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
No, it was such a score when you got a
proper one.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
Yeah, that warning, the sound that guy's voice. I can
hear it in my head. It was menacing if I
find it, Yeah, stop it in Yes.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Have you ever bought or readed a videotape that wasn't
quite right? It may have been a pirate copy, an
illegal and inferior copy for which you paid good money.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
When I was little, like five or six, my big
brother told me that if a car runs out of gas,
it explodes. I would start to panic every time my
mom said we were getting low again. Even today, knowing
that it does not explode, I still cannot let the
car get below a third of a tank, just in case.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Yeah, for trauma, let go of it fair enough.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
This is also there's a real belly button thing. Dad
said if he unscrewed my belly button, my bumbled fall.
I ran screaming every time he waved a screwdriver right
now and then another person wrote, When I asked my
dad what would happen if my belly button became unscrewed,
he said, my legs would fall off. I washed it
(07:48):
so carefully in the shower.
Speaker 1 (07:52):
Imagine. Oh no, remember when you were kids, like, because
have you got an Inny or an Audi any Most
people have got innies. The Audi were on the outer
like seeing somebody with an Audi was fascinating to me.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
My son's got an audio and you can't seem to
get past it. It's a real thing for him.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Well it should be. It's an Audi out, is it?
You just want to fit in in life? You've got
an Audi. You're not fitting in in life?
Speaker 2 (08:19):
I know, I thought, I don't mind them, although it
does bring me back to that feeling when you're pregnant. Yeah,
and the belly button comes out and it's it feels sensitive.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
Well because there's it's like a link down like it
shoots down to your giant.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Oh my god, I've only got a couple more. This
is actually brilliant. My mum used to tell me that
Better Homes and Gardens was coming to photograph our house
in order to get us to clean it. Of course,
something always happened that prevented them from coming and she
had to reschedule. That's pretty that's pretty genius. So good,
And this I just thought was quite interesting too. My
(08:55):
mum told me that if you hold your pea for
long enough, your bladder will pop like a burst balloon.
And then a woman replied to that and she said
that isn't too far from the truth. Oh, if you
have a full bladder and something hits your lower abdomen,
it can split your bladder. It happened to me last December.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
That sounds so painful. And then just pisce inside you.
Speaker 2 (09:17):
Oh, I mean I guess it's sterile. Is it sterile?
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (09:21):
They do think that's.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Yeah, But I just don't think it should be floating
around your fillopian tubes and stuff.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
And I don't think you want it to Yeah, you
don't want it to split tode. No, And Okay, so
there's two more. My sister told me that if you
counted all the stones of Stonehenge, you will die. I
still don't know how many stones there are in Stone.
Speaker 1 (09:39):
There's not that many. I went there. I was so bored,
But I think I was younger and I didn't realize, oh,
this is natural, Like these just rocked up somehow.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
Did they?
Speaker 3 (09:50):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (09:50):
And I remember going and putting on their headphones and
it was freezing cold, and I just walked around. I
would have been twenty one, so I was old enough
to really try and appreciate that stuff. And I just
went and sat in the bus.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
I was like, nah, you know what. I know this
is going to sound disrespectful, but it's not meant to.
But it's like my mum went on a holiday with
her friend and part of the holiday was going to
Ularu and mum was standing with her friend looking at it,
and her friend was getting really emotional, you know how
amazing it was. And my Mom's like, I don't know,
(10:24):
I don't get what the big deal is.
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Yeah, I know, because you want to feel those emotions
at those big things, like the big the natural wonders
where like but I feel like I would be the same.
This is completely different to that. But the other day
there was fireworks, and I know fireworks are terrible for
dogs and like, yeah, everything, but they do these fireworks
(10:46):
near our house. I'm like, you couldn't fucking get me
to leave the house for a firework. There's nothing special
about a firework to me. Where the awe some people
have over and I know it's not a natural wonder,
but the awe of like oh my god, it's so beautiful.
I'm like, this is shit.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
You don't really get it either. I get it when
you got like kids. Although my daughter it was always
a trauma. She was Terri, Yeah, fireworks New Ye's Eve
was fucking fun. And then this last one was my
dad told me that Pumas was whale pooh. I believed
him and talk some to school for show and talent.
Speaker 1 (11:23):
Don't you clean your feet with?
Speaker 2 (11:26):
How could you let you keep me humiliated?
Speaker 1 (11:29):
How random too? Out of all the animals, whale poop
I know. And then the kid I've got show and tell,
I've got some whale pop And you can see.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
How they think that because it sort of looks way I.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
Guess it's my shape of a whale.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
And it's got like the little sort of it looks calcified. Yeah,
I know, how funny would good?
Speaker 1 (11:51):
I thought that was great. They delivered at two am,
and they delivered now as well. So thank you for those,
and thank you very much for listening. We will be
back with you really soon. Give us a rating or
a comment wherever you listen to our podcast, that would
be so very much appreciated. Share it with your mates
(12:11):
and we'll chat to you soon, but by for now,
love you