November 15, 2020 • 33 mins
Adam Hills takes us on a journey to Nirvana – and does a pretty good Groucho Marx impression.
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
My favorite conversations with people are when they share something
about themselves that's real, honest and revealing. I think the
objects we have in our lives have so much meaning
when you stop and think about them. This show is
about that. What if some of the world's funniest and
most interesting people chose three of their most treasured objects
and shared the stories behind them, stories you've never heard before.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
So that first spot was in nineteen eighty nine. Can
you remember what was in the first five? Yes? Really
honestly old sex jokes, but it this way. The MC
walked on stage after me and said, Adam Hills, everybody,
isn't it funny that the guys that talk about it
the most do it the least, and got a huge
(00:45):
round of applause because the entire audience went, Yeah, that's
pretty much what we were thinking.
Speaker 1 (00:50):
I'm Christian O'Connell and this is the stuff of legends
today with Adam Hills.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
Hello, I'm Adam Hills.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
Adam I did not know he's a former tennis coach.
Who knew He's hosted the beloved ABC show Spicks and Specs,
which is a kind of pre Never mind the bus Cocks,
host of the brilliant, the last leg in the UK,
making him loved across the Commonwealth and undoubtedly one of
Now I would say, probably the nicest man in the industry.
(01:19):
Or in his words, professional fool. What a great way
to describe it. So if we met in apartment's really
what you'd say to me?
Speaker 2 (01:26):
You're a professional full look, I would say comedian. But
if I was trying to explain to someone who didn't
know what a comedian was, I would say I get
paid to be a fool for the enjoyment of others.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
But more than anything, Adam loves his family and that
brings us to his first item.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
So my first object is a toy fluffy, red and
green rabbit that my dad brought into the hospital for
me when I was three days old. Wow. And it
was because he supported the South Sydney Rabitoz rugby league team.
His dad supported the Sausidian Rabeno's rugby league team and
he was making sure his son was going to support
the same team. The joy of this little rabbit is
(02:04):
that if you look at merchandise now from rugby league
teams or from whatever else, it's really quite intricate. It'll
have the jersey and it'll have the you know, stitches
sewn into it, and it'll look like a real replica
in the eyes. All look, this is not that. This
is a white rabbit head with a red body, with
arms that stick out and green legs, and that's it.
(02:27):
It's the colors of South Sydney, but it's not the Jersey.
And I love that, Like, that's a nineteen seventies, yeah toy.
That's what merch was then. Yeah, and it's exactly what
merch was. It probably wasn't even merch. It wasn't even
official merch. It would have been like at a local
toy shop. And it might have even been a fluke
that it was red and green. It might not have
even been a South Sydney rabbit. I love the fact.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
So your dad was on the way to obviously see you,
but he would have stopped off, gone out a way
and all that excitement of being a new dad.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
But still thought, this is really important.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
I get him this, I think so a three day
old potential, this has got to be handled before anything else,
before we give him a name or anything.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Absolutely, stuff matters, absolutely, And I've still got that rabbit
and that's great, And the reason I've selected that as
an item is because it represents my family had a
great family upbringing. My dad was a quantus steward, so
he was away a lot, but it meant when he
was home he was properly home. And it wasn't until
remember I was doing gigs in Newcastle in England and
(03:29):
whenever you do gig or you used to do gigs
at the Hyena Comedy Club. Instead of putting you up
in a hotel, they put you up in an apartment
because one of the owners of the club had an
apartment and he was a comic and he was always away,
so you'd end up spending a weekend in an apartment
with one or two other comics that you were on
the bill with, and you got to know each other.
And I had a couple of weekends where it was
basically me and Frankie Boyle just living in this apartment together,
(03:52):
and I think the first time we were drinking and
the second time we weren't. But we would come home
after gigs and we would sit up until six in
the morning, drinking cup of tea, talking about the universe,
talking about Terence McKenna and existentialism and twenty twelve prophecies
and all that kind of stuff. But I remember Frankie
talking about something about his dad would come home from
work at seven o'clock every night, and then he'd see
(04:13):
him for maybe an hour or before he went to bed,
And that was the first time it occurred to me, Oh, yeah,
that's what most dads did. They would go off to
work in the morning, and they would come home at
seven o'clock at night, Whereas my dad had been gone
for two weeks and then one day I'd come home
from school at three in the afternoon and he'd be
on the bean bag boasting about how he'd been awake
for twenty seven hours because he'd flown in from Bahrain
(04:34):
or something. And then he'd be home for a week
and a half. And we just have Dad all the
time at home. So I had this really weird childhood
of him being away a lot. And in the days when,
like Mum told me recently, he'd be gone for twenty
one days, he might phone once because it was so expensive.
You know, you didn't have FaceTime, you didn't have that
kind of all that stuff we think has been around
(04:56):
just always. You can't imagine what that would be like.
Like without it because we just take it for granted,
all that stuff. Oh, I was so exciting when the
phone would ring and we find out a landline. Yeah,
you said, Dad, from the other side of the world.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
He's gone through the land and under oceans net just
to speak to you. And it would have sounded distant
as well, didn't it when you spoke to someone overseas.
Speaker 2 (05:16):
Oh, and there was a huge delay. It was almost
like a two second delay when you spoke. So it
was really frustrating. But then it meant when he was
home it was all the more exciting. And we'd have
Daddy dinners when he'd cook for us, and you know,
we'd sit down in the afternoon and watch children's television.
We watched Bugs Bunny cartoons together. So it was this
really happy childhood in a part of Sydney called the
southerland Shire, so it wasn't even South Sydney Reveno's territory.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Tell me a bit more about then, the cuddly toy, right,
what did it look like?
Speaker 2 (05:42):
It would be as big as this six hundred mil
water bottle.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Thank you for being so precise. We're not just saying
water bowl. You can tell you're a pro six hundred.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
It's a picture of people's mind.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
I don't want anyone listen to this. I think it's
a later you know, it's six hundred miles. A stand
where you comparison, You compare anything is whether you go
six hundred or when you go on a thousands.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
So yeah, it's what's that about? Eight inches nine inches high,
fluffy white head. It's your basic green arms, green arms,
red legs, or vice versa. It just looks like a
toy from the seventies. It looks like a toy from
nineteen seven, those older toys.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
I've still got my cudly toy that I had when
I was a kid, from the seventies.
Speaker 2 (06:20):
I was born seventy three. It seems something a bit
basic and innocent. Yes, do you know what it is?
I think there's no brand name on it. Yeah, that's it.
You couldn't I couldn't tell you who made that toy.
So when my first daughter was born, I found this
really lovely handcrafted rabbit, and so I made sure she
had that when she was born. I love that you're
(06:42):
still carrying that tradition on. We really lovely. Then when
my second daughter was born, as is the way with
second daughters. Oh no, you're like, oh man, I've got
to get I forgot to get the rabbit. But then
part of me went, well, hang on, what's going to
happen to my rabbit, the one that my dad gave me.
I've got to hand that down. Event So that's gone
on to my second daughter. So she's got the original rabbit.
(07:03):
My first order has got her own rabbit. And you know,
I've instilled in them the kind of the love of
the South Sydney rabbits as well, which is hard when
you live in Milton. We're saying stilled.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
The thenipistol say, brainwashed, water boarded the word looking for.
That's why you compared it to six hundred milli liters
of water.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Now I get the water connection. But of course that
rugby league thing. You know, I played rugby league when
I was a kid. That was that was the sport
I really wanted to play. And I played touch football
at primary school. I played rugby league full contact at
Ginale Boys High School B team. I wasn't good enough
for the A team. Got about thirteen or fourteen. It
was pretty obvious that having a prosthetic league wasn't gonna,
(07:48):
you know, be the best for me playing rugby league.
And so not only does that rabbit represent my family,
it kind of represents this what I've I've rediscovered rugby
league recently because twenty seventeen found fod out that there
are five teams in Sydney that played disability rugby league
and I contacted them and said, you know, can I help,
can I support? Can I possibly even play? And they went,
(08:10):
well no, because you live in London. But the Warrington
Wolves want to start up England's first disability rugby league team.
Maybe you should get in contact with them, And it's
open this whole new chapter in my life. When I
live in London, I go to Warrington, which is like
a two hour train ride. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
I mean, people wherever you listened to this, you need
to appreciate about Adam and doing this and this. There
was a great documentary that you made about it, and
I remember speaking to ah yes On eight years ago
about it and I thought you were doing it just
for a bit or something for a TV thing, but
you weren't. It was coming from a genuine place and
it was like a four hour round trip just to
go and do the training session.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
Yeah. So every Tuesday I would hop on maybe a
three point thirty train out of Euston station gets into
Warrington at quarter past five. I wandered to the stadium,
which is just I walk into the reception of a
rugby league stadium and they're like, oh hey, Adam, Yeah.
Just walk up to the Foundations, which is the charity
arm of the Warrington and they're amazing. They have like,
(09:04):
you know, a dementia friendly cafe, they have dance classes
for the elderly. They had soccer football for disability, but
they never had rugby league. And then we'll head over
to the University of Chester Padgate campus. We train indoors
for about an hour and a half two hours and
proper training, like proper physical boots camp. Vomit because it
(09:25):
was such hard work. A few other teams formed and
we ended up with the best record over there. We
came out to Australia. We played the South Sydney rabbit Os,
so it was up against men so much to well.
I had this really weird moment though, because we'd organize
this as the club challenge. Because we ended up having
the best record in the UK. The Rabbito has won
their Grand Final here, so we went right, this is
(09:46):
to see who's world champions. And I happened to be
having dinner with Russell Crowe in London, who owns the
South Sidnior Rabbitos, and I said all this to him,
and I went, I don't know who to play for,
like it's my boyhood club, and you know my dad
has since passed away, but I wanted to honor his memory,
and and I thought he was going to go, well,
you got to play for the rabbit O's made. What's
wrong with you? And he paused and he went, You've
(10:07):
got to earn that jersey. This is something it was.
You can't you can't just turn up, put on the
red and green and you're suddenly a rabbit O. You've
got to train with him, you're gonna sweat with him,
you're gonna lose blood with him. You can't just turn
up out of the blue and play for them. And
I went, I know, this is exactly my point. What
should I do? And even I don't know, Let me
think about it. And about a month later I got
(10:27):
a text from him saying I've got it. I'll sponsor
your jersey so you can play for the Wolves. But
you can still have the rabbit on your chest. What
a great guy like that is? Thought, Yeah, your dilemma. Yeah,
it was incredible, man. I love that story. Ended up
playing we played on a n Z stadium in Sydney.
Did you have a little rabbit with you or something
(10:48):
in the dressing room? No, because that would have been weird.
That would have been weird to have a red South
Sydney rabbit. Actually, when I'm about to play against them,
the weirdest bit was running onto the pitch and you know,
the ground announced went here's the Warrington Wolves and they
played hungry like the wolf. Yeah, of course you do.
And then the South Sydney team came out and they
played the club anthem Glory Glory to South Sidney, and
(11:10):
I kind of went, oh god, I didn't expect that.
I had to block it out. I literally had to
walk up to one corner of the pitch and sing
something else in my head to get the South Sydney
club song out of my head because I knew it
would affect me. Wow. So we played them, we won,
we became world champions, and then three days later we
had a friendly game at Redfernoval, which is their home ground,
and I played the second the first half of the Rabbit.
(11:32):
O's awesome, and it just turned out that it was
Father's Day. No, didn't really, it didn't plan it that way.
It turned out that it was Father's Day. My dad
wasn't there, my mum was there, but it was just
this really lovely failure.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
Absolutely, yeah, And so the rabbit represents, you know, my
dad and my family.
Speaker 1 (11:51):
That tiny little rabbit has so much meaning. That's what
I like about this idea is these objects in our
lives we don't really think about that much, but when
you go back and think about them, it's got Look
all that's come out of that. What it means to you.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
You're exactly right when you pick an object, If you
pick the right object, that means a lot to you.
It means a lot to you because it's got so much. Yeah,
so many stories attached to it. This rugby league journey
that I've been on. One of the biggest things to
come out of it for me was realizing that I
don't have to be a loser, because as a comedian,
the funniest thing is to lose, to get things wrong,
(12:23):
and I assumed that was my modus operandi. That's what
I'm good at, stuffing things up, making a fool of
myself and getting a laugh out of it. And there
have been moments playing rugby league where I've had to
try and actively fight that yeah, and think what if
I stuff it up? What if I do something wrong?
What if I let the team down? And you have
to kind of overcome your little negative inner thoughts. And
(12:45):
this whole journey for me of I don't think I'm
a loser after all. Isn't that amazing? I sort of
rediscovering a different part of yourself at the age of
forty nine. So it's been this incredible journey of discovering
that of self confidence. And I know it has for
everybody else because it's a team full of people with disabilities,
(13:06):
with their own stories and their own things going on.
Everyone feels like there's something wrong with them, whether it's
cerebral palsy or an arm missing, or an accident or
the way you were born. We've all got that kind
of in built there's something wrong with me, And to
be winners and competitors is a huge way of overcoming
you know what therapy could have taken years to overcome Yeah,
(13:28):
it's true, isn't it.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
You're still getting the benefit from that little cudly toy
d years ago.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
There's something really sweet about that. And that's and I
think I feel I feel him with me all the
time when I'm playing. I have moments where I kind
of I almost you know, in a quiet moment, I think,
do you know what? I might just tell my dad
what I've been up to since he died, and then
I'll start and go, No, he knows, he knows, he's watching,
(13:54):
he knows. I don't need to tell him. He's across
at all. He's there as I'm doing it. So yeah,
that thing of you know, when someone dies, they do
live on and in a little rabbit or in me
when I'm on the field, not dropping the ball at
the wrong moment or whatever else. It's yeah, So that
for me, it's that rabbit represents family and how strong
(14:15):
my family are in my life.
Speaker 1 (14:22):
I'm Christian O'Connell and this is the stuff of legends
today with Adam Hills. So far we've learned how one
little rabbit inspired his rugby league career.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
So what's his next item? Next item, it's a signed
artists contract from nineteen seventy two. It's framed and it
is signed by Groucho Marx from the Marx Brothers. And
I bought it at an auction in Adelaide. I was
so desperate to buy this, so I saved up money.
(14:55):
I was twenty three, twenty four. I was on radio
in adelat and I'd set myself a limit for this
auction item. What's the highest I would pay for this?
And I was mad and I went ten grand. That's
the highest I will go for this is ten grand.
That's my upper limit. Right never been to an auction before.
I'm sitting there and all the other others had come up,
(15:17):
and right now it is a side artist contract ninety
seventy two Grauchio Marx from the Marx Brothers. I'm going
to start at ten thousand dollars, And I thought, do
you know what in for pound? In for a penny?
And the guy looked at me. The auctioneer looked at me,
and I nodded, and I reckon he The only thing
(15:39):
I can think is he just thought, you idiot, and
he ignored me, and he looked around and he went, okay,
do I hear five thousand dollars and I thought, hang on,
he just I'm sure he saw me go yes for
ten thousand, and he's now saying no one's gone. So
I went, right, I'm gonna sit this out. I'm gonna
sit this out. And he went, okay, let's start lower.
(16:01):
Do I hear? Do I hear? And he went down
to like five hundred dollars and I was like, oh
my god, thank god, that guy just saved me. What
a nice guy. And then I think I got in
a bit of a bidding war and I got it
for two and a half thousand dollars. Wow, So that
guy saved I don't know. You must've just looked at
me and thought, you have no idea how to do
this auction. Don't go in with the first bigu idiot.
(16:25):
I want a million dollars for this Snickers bar. I
wind money and this grout show signed contract? Is it?
Is it the entire contract? Yes? It is. Oh, I've
seen that online? All right, Yes, so it's the full contract.
One side is a photocopy because it's it's like it's
printed the front and back, but the back is the
(16:46):
one that signed with his handwriting at the age of
seventy two, very frail handwriting, and you know, with his
address on it, which I've then checked, and you know
that was where he lived at the time. So I've
got this remarkable piece of comedy history. And I think
it was I think before then, well before then. I
remember being at on a family holiday. Because my dad
(17:08):
worked for contests, we got free family holidays. Great part
of that trip we went to Universal Studios and a
lot of people dressed as Groucho marks that particular day
and I asked someone why and they said, wow, it's
Groutchow's ninety ninth birthday would have been in ninety ninth
birthday today, all right. I said, I'm a huge fan
of the Marx Brothers. In fact, my parents probably said
that because I was too shy. He loves the Marx Brothers.
(17:30):
And they went, oh, well, we're actually doing a grout
show sounderlike competition today and we don't have enough people
to enter. Do you want to get up on stage
and say one line as Groucho Marx and as a prize,
we'll give your family like a free day in Universal Studios. Yeah, okay,
I'm in like a feeler tracksuit. And there were three competitors.
(17:54):
The other two were dressed as Grout show mark there's
some Aussie kids. So musy Kid puts on a Groucho
glasses and and the line was, oh, one morning, I
shot an elephant in my pajamas. How are we going
to my pajamas? I'll never know? That was the line.
That's actually a pretty good impression. But was it that
(18:15):
good at nineteen? It actually was. It wasn't too bad
at nineteen, actually, I thought, and I think they were expecting.
You know, this is in the days of just after
Crocodile Dundee, so I think they thought it was going
to be a one day I saw a crocodile. Lem
me Jim jams, so that's not an elephant. This is
an elephant. So I did it, and they said, hey,
(18:39):
you congratulations. Your family went a day in the park.
But one of the judges was Groucho Martz's son, who
was a screenwriter and also a champion tennis player.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
And then hang on, aute, this is all too much
so with your past as a former tennis coach and
now you're a fan of Groutcher marks you in front
of his son, who also happens to be a tennis coach.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
Yes, yeah, and was like a championship tennis player, played professionally.
So my mum has a photo and I I said,
get a pot, get a foot. So I'm chatting to
Groucho Marx's son about tennis, and my mum took a photo.
But it's one of those ones where I'm mid conversation
and I've got this really weird face and it's not
(19:18):
you know. Now you go, oh, that didn't work out.
Take another photo on your phone. Take five, get a burst.
The only photo of me with Groudchow Marxes. I can't
even You'll have to describe this face. I'm basically going,
you don't know, having a stroke.
Speaker 1 (19:35):
Always part of your Groucho impression. I don't know, it's
hard to tell. Wow, that's it. That's your only lasting
memory of it.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Only photo of me with Groutchow, Marx's son. I'm pulling
a ridiculous face. So where is the country. There's an
extra story added to it. So I bought it in
Adelaide and it was on my wall in Adelaide, and
then I had it in storage in Adelaide for ages,
and then I was going back doing the Adelaide fringe
one year and I thought, you know what, I'm going
to take a couple of things back to Sydney, back
to my parents' place, and the frame will be one
(20:02):
of those. And Ross Noble, I just got to know
Ross Novo, the English comedian. And Ross came out to
me one night and he went, what are you doing
after this? And I said, I'm going back to Sydney actually,
and he went how are you getting to Sydney? And
I said, well, I'm driving and he went can I
come with you? What? And he said, I've got a
flight to Melbourne, but I've just been booked on a
TV show in Sydney and he went I couldn't be
(20:23):
asked booking a flight. Can I come with you? And
I went yeah, but it's like it's a two day drive.
We're gonna have to stop somewhere overnight and he went
is it a road trip? And he went how good's
your car? And I said, well, it'll get us there,
and he went normal, is it all enough that we
could chainsaw off the top and drive it like we're
in a feminine hygiene ad? And I said to Uss, no,
(20:49):
I'm not changed. Sorry at the top off my car all?
And then he went can we wear cowboy hats and
listen to Chris Christophus and tips, yes we can. So
we turned out two days later with two cowboys and
a country in Western Cassette because he couldn't find Chris
Christophers specifically, and we loaded up this car with his
(21:12):
stuff and my stuff and this Groucho Marks frame and
we drove. We decided we were going to stop at all
the big things. I had to explain how there are
these big, you know, tourist attractions across Australia. Our favorite
to this day. We were talking about it recently. Norandra.
And what I love about Nerandre is, you know, you
drive into town and hey, home are the big Prawn
and home of the big you know, pineapple or whatever.
(21:33):
You're driving to Norandra and there was a sign, massive
sign welcome to Norandra, home of the world's second largest
playable guitar, which in itself is funny. One hundred meters
down the road there's an old, dilapidated sign that's half
falling off and faded that says welcome to Norandra, home
(21:55):
of the world's largest playable guitar. Only in Australia. That's amazing,
saddest and funniest, brilliant. But this whole trip, that contract
has been with me, you know, through everything, and that
is that is my most certainly my most prized comedy
(22:19):
cool thing to have. It's amazing. But yeah, to have
that little piece of history as as a comedy fan
and as a Marx Brothers fan, I don't think I'll
get any better than that, There's no way. So the
third item was the trickiest one because I really was
(22:40):
thinking hard about if everything, all of my possessions were destroyed,
what are the positions. So I've got the rabbit, that's
my family connection, and then the comedy connection is the contract.
And the object that I'd really want to keep is
a silk scarf that was given to me by the
Dalai Lama. So I was asked maybe ten years ago
(23:01):
to go to Perth and host a concert for his Holiness,
the Dalai Lama, and I think he was on a
speaking tour of Australia, and I think actually what happened
was they booked the venue in the morning for the speech,
they had it for the afternoon. Anyway, thought ah, I
may as well make some money out of let's put
on a concert for his Holiness and one of the
performers was Luca Bloom, Irish performer who who has done
(23:25):
a lot of stuff with the Dalai Lama, so there
was a connection there, but the rest of it was
like there was this weird band I think they were
called like the Nobel All Stars, and there was one
person dressed as Albert Einstein, and one person dressed as
Mother Teresa and one person dressed as quite super cool.
(23:46):
I think there was a moment where His Holiness met
the guy dressed as His Holiness, but then it was
like from memory, Tim Rodgers, the Baby Animals, Tex Perkins,
and it was really just to get a lot of
young people along to watch the bands. But before it
all kicked off, we told we would have a private
(24:08):
audience with His Holiness. So we were backstage in the
dressing room, all of us just kind of sitting around,
and then the Dalai Lama is brought in and sat
down and said a few words and then said are
there any questions. Everyone was like, I didn't know there
were question All I genuinely wanted to go is how
are you? And there are a few awkward moments, but
(24:29):
there was one thing that he said that really sort
out in his lovely way of speaking kind of said.
He said, I do not sing. I do not know music,
he said, but I do know. You have a microphone.
You should use it to see something. And what you
can see is nonviolence, not peace. And then this is
the joke that he made countries go to war for peace.
(24:51):
How can you fight for peace non violence? You cannot
fight for non violence, and then gave this beautiful speech.
So then the concert started and I think the Nobel
All Stars played first, and then Luca Bloom played a
beautiful song. I think I was just standing backstage, and
I knew that my job was to introduce His Holiness
onto the stage. And then you know, his minder came
up and said, would you walk out on stage with him? Please?
(25:15):
And I went, of course, I will, yes, of course,
And his Holiness came up and I shook his hand
and said a pleasure to meet you, and how are you?
I managed to ask how are you? And he said
I'm fine, and he had a bit of a sniffle,
and then his handler said, okay, it's time to go,
and he held my hand. He just held my hand
and we just walked out on stage together. The Dalai
Lama and I holding hands. I walked him to his
(25:37):
seat and he sat down and I said, good evening everyone,
and I got to make a joke to him. And
the joke was this so earlier that week Karl Stefanovic
had interviewed him yea, and they had been a big
thing because Karl had tried to tell him a joke.
And the joke was the Dalai Lama goes into a
pizza shop and orders a pizza and says, can you
make me one with everything? Not a bad joke, joke
(26:01):
if this is the important point, if you know what
a pizza shop is, or pizza toppings or are across
the dual meanings of the phrase make me one with everything,
and make me one with everything doesn't go to you know,
(26:22):
pizza apparently apparently a super supreme is not in his vocal.
Everyone was talking about it at the time because you know,
the Carl was like, the Dalai Lama goes to a
pizza shop, and then his translator goes pizza shop, pizza shop,
it is possible to continue, and then he tells the joke, says,
(26:46):
make me one with everything, and there's this massive pause.
No mine, it just didn't get it, like, why would you.
It's not even your set, it's probably your third or
fourth language. So anyway, Dallai Lung comes out, his Holiness
sits down. I open the show, good evening, blah blah blah.
This is what we're here for. And I said, your Holiness,
(27:08):
I am the only person on the bill who was
not a musician. I am a comedian, but I promise
I will not try to tell you a joke. And
there was a pause and I went, oh god, it
hasn't worked, and his translator let down, and then his
Holiness went, oh my god. It was like the count
from Sesame Street one bad job, and oh my god,
(27:31):
I've just made the Dalai Lama laugh in the most
Buddhist way possible by doing nothing. I didn't even tell
him a joke, and I made him laugh about the
joke that I'm not telling him. I mean, the concert
was beautiful. He only stayed for a couple of songs.
He stayed for Luca Bloom and then presented silk scarves
(27:52):
to everyone that was on stage. And I'm way over
the other side of the stage, knowing what my job is,
and his handler looked over at me and nodded, and
I went, oh, okay, coming to the end, and I
nodded back, and he went and shook his head and
went nodded, and then kind of motioned me to come over,
and I went, yeah, when it's done, or come over,
and he went, mmmm, he's doing with the hand gesture.
Once you get over here, you're crazy kid. And so
(28:14):
I came over to him, thinking, oh, okay, I was.
I was told the Dalai Lama would leave the stage
when he was ready and then I would pick up.
So I was coming over to kind of have the discussion,
and then he put his hand up to stop, and
then the Dalai Lama picks up a silk scarf and
then he motioned me for me to come forward. Oh
my god, I'm getting a scarf. I'm being given a
blessing and a scarf from his holiness. It's incredible. Oh,
(28:36):
it was really, really lovely. I love the idea of spirituality,
and there is something about and I've spoken to other
people about this, when you're in the presence of the
Dalai Lama, you feel that for a few days afterwards.
I don't know what it is, you know, the synic
in me goes, well, I'm just projecting because I know
it's you know, he's just a simple person. He would
say that I'm just a Buddhist monk, but you kind
of feel energetic. Yeah, there's something about him. So that scarf,
(28:59):
as well as being a pro possession is also an
important part of my life. Is that that spiritual side
and that that energy side. When you work with energy
and meditation and whatever it is, whether it's you know,
tai chi or whatever it is that puts you in
the kind of flow of the universe. Where Robb Legal
have done that four years, well look at what that transformed.
(29:19):
I do you know what I mean? I kind of
feel like this whole journey with Rugby League from me
helping this team and then going let's film it for
a documentary. I mean, that could have been anything. We
could have been the worst team in Britain. We could
have just been middle of the road. The way the
whole story came together where the Rabbit O's my boyhood
team became the best team in Australia, we became the
(29:39):
best team in the UK. I got knocked out at
one point. It provided a bit of drama. We came
to Australia became world champions. We played on Fathers to
all of that. You know, I genuinely believe that if
you're open to the universe, then you can kind of connect.
You know. Taoism will often talk about it black being
a river. You can't control it, but if you just
(30:00):
let yourself go and let it carry you, you'll avoid
the rocks. It'll take you where you need to be.
And I think in a comedy sense, and especially when
you're at libbing, you know, you just get a sense
from the audience. You get a sense from looking at
people who's going to be good value. I remember doing
a show where there are a bunch of and this
is a really formative, you know, comedy point for me.
(30:22):
There are a bunch of butchers in the front row.
And now I grew up on a gift and I
remember this table of butchers and I was comparing the
show and I just I put them down. I did
five minutes of jokes, putting them down for being butchers.
Brought on the first act and they heckled him until
he had to leave the stage. And I remember sitting
backstage going wow, where did that negative energy come from?
And thought, oh, me, like in that whole raiki sense.
(30:44):
So I just went out and put negative in. I
just told them their jobs were worthless. Of course they're
going to tear apart the next person on stage. What
are you thinking? So I went back out on stage
and then virtually apologized, but in a funny way, and
tried to think of, Okay, what would be what would
they hate about their job with people like me? And
and I actually said to me, you must hate people
(31:04):
like me. You slave all day over the perfect cut
of meat. You try and trim the fat, you get
the right and you know exactly how it should be cooked,
and then you sell it to some idiot like me,
who you know is going to burn it on a
barbecue until it's black. And they laughed and they were like, yes,
that is oh man, there is no need to be negative.
(31:25):
I even rewrote one of my jokes at the time,
which was the joke was and I've done it plenty
of times, but I used to say, look, I hate
American people because they name their children after personality traits.
They hope they're going to grow up with our faith.
Have you seen help the Ana? And they're waiting for
charity And then I'd go on and say, you know,
can you imagine an Aussi bloke name and his kids
the way he hopes they're going to grow up. This
(31:46):
is my son opening Batsman, that's my other son drinks beer, etc.
And about this time I kind of went, why am
Why am I saying I hate Americans. I'm just saying
that because that's what you say to say up a joke.
There's absolutely no reason for me to say I hate
I could and I rewrote the joke. I I love
Americans because they know that children have to presidentality. It
(32:09):
was just comedy at the time, was let's take everybody down.
You know, sure you can go on a stage and
take down whoever needs taking down, and you don't need
to say I hate Americans or you butcherser eiots or whatever,
just because that's what people do. You can lift people
up with comedy. So that's you know, that's that scarf. Weirdly,
you know that idea of if you've got a microphone,
(32:29):
use it to say something. You know, if you can
be positive, be positive.
Speaker 1 (32:38):
Thank you very much too. Today's legend Adam Hills. He
has something that makes us all a bit larger in ourselves.
I mean that some people light you up, and that
is what Adam Hills does. What I loved was the
way that each of his items came back to those
things that truly matter to him, his family, Rugby comedy.
Speaker 2 (32:56):
I think rugby is above comedy.
Speaker 1 (32:57):
Actually, even though he's a professional comedian, Spirituality and what's
most important, and he got to bring a lot of
that together by telling the Dalai Lama, a joke not
many of us can say that. Make sure you don't
miss any of our upcoming legends. Follow the show for
free on iHeartRadio or whatever podcast app you're listening to
(33:18):
us on right now. I'm Christian O'Connell. Thanks for listening.
Until next time. This is the stuff of legends.
My favorite conversations with people are when they share something
about themselves that's real, honest and revealing. I think the
objects we have in our lives have so much meaning
when you stop and think about them. This show is
about that. What if some of the world's funniest and
most interesting people chose three of their most treasured objects
and shared the stories behind them, stories you've never heard before.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
So that first spot was in nineteen eighty nine. Can
you remember what was in the first five? Yes? Really
honestly old sex jokes, but it this way. The MC
walked on stage after me and said, Adam Hills, everybody,
isn't it funny that the guys that talk about it
the most do it the least, and got a huge
(00:45):
round of applause because the entire audience went, Yeah, that's
pretty much what we were thinking.
Speaker 1 (00:50):
I'm Christian O'Connell and this is the stuff of legends
today with Adam Hills.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
Hello, I'm Adam Hills.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
Adam I did not know he's a former tennis coach.
Who knew He's hosted the beloved ABC show Spicks and Specs,
which is a kind of pre Never mind the bus Cocks,
host of the brilliant, the last leg in the UK,
making him loved across the Commonwealth and undoubtedly one of
Now I would say, probably the nicest man in the industry.
(01:19):
Or in his words, professional fool. What a great way
to describe it. So if we met in apartment's really
what you'd say to me?
Speaker 2 (01:26):
You're a professional full look, I would say comedian. But
if I was trying to explain to someone who didn't
know what a comedian was, I would say I get
paid to be a fool for the enjoyment of others.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
But more than anything, Adam loves his family and that
brings us to his first item.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
So my first object is a toy fluffy, red and
green rabbit that my dad brought into the hospital for
me when I was three days old. Wow. And it
was because he supported the South Sydney Rabitoz rugby league team.
His dad supported the Sausidian Rabeno's rugby league team and
he was making sure his son was going to support
the same team. The joy of this little rabbit is
(02:04):
that if you look at merchandise now from rugby league
teams or from whatever else, it's really quite intricate. It'll
have the jersey and it'll have the you know, stitches
sewn into it, and it'll look like a real replica
in the eyes. All look, this is not that. This
is a white rabbit head with a red body, with
arms that stick out and green legs, and that's it.
(02:27):
It's the colors of South Sydney, but it's not the Jersey.
And I love that, Like, that's a nineteen seventies, yeah toy.
That's what merch was then. Yeah, and it's exactly what
merch was. It probably wasn't even merch. It wasn't even
official merch. It would have been like at a local
toy shop. And it might have even been a fluke
that it was red and green. It might not have
even been a South Sydney rabbit. I love the fact.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
So your dad was on the way to obviously see you,
but he would have stopped off, gone out a way
and all that excitement of being a new dad.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
But still thought, this is really important.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
I get him this, I think so a three day
old potential, this has got to be handled before anything else,
before we give him a name or anything.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Absolutely, stuff matters, absolutely, And I've still got that rabbit
and that's great, And the reason I've selected that as
an item is because it represents my family had a
great family upbringing. My dad was a quantus steward, so
he was away a lot, but it meant when he
was home he was properly home. And it wasn't until
remember I was doing gigs in Newcastle in England and
(03:29):
whenever you do gig or you used to do gigs
at the Hyena Comedy Club. Instead of putting you up
in a hotel, they put you up in an apartment
because one of the owners of the club had an
apartment and he was a comic and he was always away,
so you'd end up spending a weekend in an apartment
with one or two other comics that you were on
the bill with, and you got to know each other.
And I had a couple of weekends where it was
basically me and Frankie Boyle just living in this apartment together,
(03:52):
and I think the first time we were drinking and
the second time we weren't. But we would come home
after gigs and we would sit up until six in
the morning, drinking cup of tea, talking about the universe,
talking about Terence McKenna and existentialism and twenty twelve prophecies
and all that kind of stuff. But I remember Frankie
talking about something about his dad would come home from
work at seven o'clock every night, and then he'd see
(04:13):
him for maybe an hour or before he went to bed,
And that was the first time it occurred to me, Oh, yeah,
that's what most dads did. They would go off to
work in the morning, and they would come home at
seven o'clock at night, Whereas my dad had been gone
for two weeks and then one day I'd come home
from school at three in the afternoon and he'd be
on the bean bag boasting about how he'd been awake
for twenty seven hours because he'd flown in from Bahrain
(04:34):
or something. And then he'd be home for a week
and a half. And we just have Dad all the
time at home. So I had this really weird childhood
of him being away a lot. And in the days when,
like Mum told me recently, he'd be gone for twenty
one days, he might phone once because it was so expensive.
You know, you didn't have FaceTime, you didn't have that
kind of all that stuff we think has been around
(04:56):
just always. You can't imagine what that would be like.
Like without it because we just take it for granted,
all that stuff. Oh, I was so exciting when the
phone would ring and we find out a landline. Yeah,
you said, Dad, from the other side of the world.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
He's gone through the land and under oceans net just
to speak to you. And it would have sounded distant
as well, didn't it when you spoke to someone overseas.
Speaker 2 (05:16):
Oh, and there was a huge delay. It was almost
like a two second delay when you spoke. So it
was really frustrating. But then it meant when he was
home it was all the more exciting. And we'd have
Daddy dinners when he'd cook for us, and you know,
we'd sit down in the afternoon and watch children's television.
We watched Bugs Bunny cartoons together. So it was this
really happy childhood in a part of Sydney called the
southerland Shire, so it wasn't even South Sydney Reveno's territory.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Tell me a bit more about then, the cuddly toy, right,
what did it look like?
Speaker 2 (05:42):
It would be as big as this six hundred mil
water bottle.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Thank you for being so precise. We're not just saying
water bowl. You can tell you're a pro six hundred.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
It's a picture of people's mind.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
I don't want anyone listen to this. I think it's
a later you know, it's six hundred miles. A stand
where you comparison, You compare anything is whether you go
six hundred or when you go on a thousands.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
So yeah, it's what's that about? Eight inches nine inches high,
fluffy white head. It's your basic green arms, green arms,
red legs, or vice versa. It just looks like a
toy from the seventies. It looks like a toy from
nineteen seven, those older toys.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
I've still got my cudly toy that I had when
I was a kid, from the seventies.
Speaker 2 (06:20):
I was born seventy three. It seems something a bit
basic and innocent. Yes, do you know what it is?
I think there's no brand name on it. Yeah, that's it.
You couldn't I couldn't tell you who made that toy.
So when my first daughter was born, I found this
really lovely handcrafted rabbit, and so I made sure she
had that when she was born. I love that you're
(06:42):
still carrying that tradition on. We really lovely. Then when
my second daughter was born, as is the way with
second daughters. Oh no, you're like, oh man, I've got
to get I forgot to get the rabbit. But then
part of me went, well, hang on, what's going to
happen to my rabbit, the one that my dad gave me.
I've got to hand that down. Event So that's gone
on to my second daughter. So she's got the original rabbit.
(07:03):
My first order has got her own rabbit. And you know,
I've instilled in them the kind of the love of
the South Sydney rabbits as well, which is hard when
you live in Milton. We're saying stilled.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
The thenipistol say, brainwashed, water boarded the word looking for.
That's why you compared it to six hundred milli liters
of water.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Now I get the water connection. But of course that
rugby league thing. You know, I played rugby league when
I was a kid. That was that was the sport
I really wanted to play. And I played touch football
at primary school. I played rugby league full contact at
Ginale Boys High School B team. I wasn't good enough
for the A team. Got about thirteen or fourteen. It
was pretty obvious that having a prosthetic league wasn't gonna,
(07:48):
you know, be the best for me playing rugby league.
And so not only does that rabbit represent my family,
it kind of represents this what I've I've rediscovered rugby
league recently because twenty seventeen found fod out that there
are five teams in Sydney that played disability rugby league
and I contacted them and said, you know, can I help,
can I support? Can I possibly even play? And they went,
(08:10):
well no, because you live in London. But the Warrington
Wolves want to start up England's first disability rugby league team.
Maybe you should get in contact with them, And it's
open this whole new chapter in my life. When I
live in London, I go to Warrington, which is like
a two hour train ride. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
I mean, people wherever you listened to this, you need
to appreciate about Adam and doing this and this. There
was a great documentary that you made about it, and
I remember speaking to ah yes On eight years ago
about it and I thought you were doing it just
for a bit or something for a TV thing, but
you weren't. It was coming from a genuine place and
it was like a four hour round trip just to
go and do the training session.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
Yeah. So every Tuesday I would hop on maybe a
three point thirty train out of Euston station gets into
Warrington at quarter past five. I wandered to the stadium,
which is just I walk into the reception of a
rugby league stadium and they're like, oh hey, Adam, Yeah.
Just walk up to the Foundations, which is the charity
arm of the Warrington and they're amazing. They have like,
(09:04):
you know, a dementia friendly cafe, they have dance classes
for the elderly. They had soccer football for disability, but
they never had rugby league. And then we'll head over
to the University of Chester Padgate campus. We train indoors
for about an hour and a half two hours and
proper training, like proper physical boots camp. Vomit because it
(09:25):
was such hard work. A few other teams formed and
we ended up with the best record over there. We
came out to Australia. We played the South Sydney rabbit Os,
so it was up against men so much to well.
I had this really weird moment though, because we'd organize
this as the club challenge. Because we ended up having
the best record in the UK. The Rabbito has won
their Grand Final here, so we went right, this is
(09:46):
to see who's world champions. And I happened to be
having dinner with Russell Crowe in London, who owns the
South Sidnior Rabbitos, and I said all this to him,
and I went, I don't know who to play for,
like it's my boyhood club, and you know my dad
has since passed away, but I wanted to honor his memory,
and and I thought he was going to go, well,
you got to play for the rabbit O's made. What's
wrong with you? And he paused and he went, You've
(10:07):
got to earn that jersey. This is something it was.
You can't you can't just turn up, put on the
red and green and you're suddenly a rabbit O. You've
got to train with him, you're gonna sweat with him,
you're gonna lose blood with him. You can't just turn
up out of the blue and play for them. And
I went, I know, this is exactly my point. What
should I do? And even I don't know, Let me
think about it. And about a month later I got
(10:27):
a text from him saying I've got it. I'll sponsor
your jersey so you can play for the Wolves. But
you can still have the rabbit on your chest. What
a great guy like that is? Thought, Yeah, your dilemma. Yeah,
it was incredible, man. I love that story. Ended up
playing we played on a n Z stadium in Sydney.
Did you have a little rabbit with you or something
(10:48):
in the dressing room? No, because that would have been weird.
That would have been weird to have a red South
Sydney rabbit. Actually, when I'm about to play against them,
the weirdest bit was running onto the pitch and you know,
the ground announced went here's the Warrington Wolves and they
played hungry like the wolf. Yeah, of course you do.
And then the South Sydney team came out and they
played the club anthem Glory Glory to South Sidney, and
(11:10):
I kind of went, oh god, I didn't expect that.
I had to block it out. I literally had to
walk up to one corner of the pitch and sing
something else in my head to get the South Sydney
club song out of my head because I knew it
would affect me. Wow. So we played them, we won,
we became world champions, and then three days later we
had a friendly game at Redfernoval, which is their home ground,
and I played the second the first half of the Rabbit.
(11:32):
O's awesome, and it just turned out that it was
Father's Day. No, didn't really, it didn't plan it that way.
It turned out that it was Father's Day. My dad
wasn't there, my mum was there, but it was just
this really lovely failure.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
Absolutely, yeah, And so the rabbit represents, you know, my
dad and my family.
Speaker 1 (11:51):
That tiny little rabbit has so much meaning. That's what
I like about this idea is these objects in our
lives we don't really think about that much, but when
you go back and think about them, it's got Look
all that's come out of that. What it means to you.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
You're exactly right when you pick an object, If you
pick the right object, that means a lot to you.
It means a lot to you because it's got so much. Yeah,
so many stories attached to it. This rugby league journey
that I've been on. One of the biggest things to
come out of it for me was realizing that I
don't have to be a loser, because as a comedian,
the funniest thing is to lose, to get things wrong,
(12:23):
and I assumed that was my modus operandi. That's what
I'm good at, stuffing things up, making a fool of
myself and getting a laugh out of it. And there
have been moments playing rugby league where I've had to
try and actively fight that yeah, and think what if
I stuff it up? What if I do something wrong?
What if I let the team down? And you have
to kind of overcome your little negative inner thoughts. And
(12:45):
this whole journey for me of I don't think I'm
a loser after all. Isn't that amazing? I sort of
rediscovering a different part of yourself at the age of
forty nine. So it's been this incredible journey of discovering
that of self confidence. And I know it has for
everybody else because it's a team full of people with disabilities,
(13:06):
with their own stories and their own things going on.
Everyone feels like there's something wrong with them, whether it's
cerebral palsy or an arm missing, or an accident or
the way you were born. We've all got that kind
of in built there's something wrong with me, And to
be winners and competitors is a huge way of overcoming
you know what therapy could have taken years to overcome Yeah,
(13:28):
it's true, isn't it.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
You're still getting the benefit from that little cudly toy
d years ago.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
There's something really sweet about that. And that's and I
think I feel I feel him with me all the
time when I'm playing. I have moments where I kind
of I almost you know, in a quiet moment, I think,
do you know what? I might just tell my dad
what I've been up to since he died, and then
I'll start and go, No, he knows, he knows, he's watching,
(13:54):
he knows. I don't need to tell him. He's across
at all. He's there as I'm doing it. So yeah,
that thing of you know, when someone dies, they do
live on and in a little rabbit or in me
when I'm on the field, not dropping the ball at
the wrong moment or whatever else. It's yeah, So that
for me, it's that rabbit represents family and how strong
(14:15):
my family are in my life.
Speaker 1 (14:22):
I'm Christian O'Connell and this is the stuff of legends
today with Adam Hills. So far we've learned how one
little rabbit inspired his rugby league career.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
So what's his next item? Next item, it's a signed
artists contract from nineteen seventy two. It's framed and it
is signed by Groucho Marx from the Marx Brothers. And
I bought it at an auction in Adelaide. I was
so desperate to buy this, so I saved up money.
(14:55):
I was twenty three, twenty four. I was on radio
in adelat and I'd set myself a limit for this
auction item. What's the highest I would pay for this?
And I was mad and I went ten grand. That's
the highest I will go for this is ten grand.
That's my upper limit. Right never been to an auction before.
I'm sitting there and all the other others had come up,
(15:17):
and right now it is a side artist contract ninety
seventy two Grauchio Marx from the Marx Brothers. I'm going
to start at ten thousand dollars, And I thought, do
you know what in for pound? In for a penny?
And the guy looked at me. The auctioneer looked at me,
and I nodded, and I reckon he The only thing
(15:39):
I can think is he just thought, you idiot, and
he ignored me, and he looked around and he went, okay,
do I hear five thousand dollars and I thought, hang on,
he just I'm sure he saw me go yes for
ten thousand, and he's now saying no one's gone. So
I went, right, I'm gonna sit this out. I'm gonna
sit this out. And he went, okay, let's start lower.
(16:01):
Do I hear? Do I hear? And he went down
to like five hundred dollars and I was like, oh
my god, thank god, that guy just saved me. What
a nice guy. And then I think I got in
a bit of a bidding war and I got it
for two and a half thousand dollars. Wow, So that
guy saved I don't know. You must've just looked at
me and thought, you have no idea how to do
this auction. Don't go in with the first bigu idiot.
(16:25):
I want a million dollars for this Snickers bar. I
wind money and this grout show signed contract? Is it?
Is it the entire contract? Yes? It is. Oh, I've
seen that online? All right, Yes, so it's the full contract.
One side is a photocopy because it's it's like it's
printed the front and back, but the back is the
(16:46):
one that signed with his handwriting at the age of
seventy two, very frail handwriting, and you know, with his
address on it, which I've then checked, and you know
that was where he lived at the time. So I've
got this remarkable piece of comedy history. And I think
it was I think before then, well before then. I
remember being at on a family holiday. Because my dad
(17:08):
worked for contests, we got free family holidays. Great part
of that trip we went to Universal Studios and a
lot of people dressed as Groucho marks that particular day
and I asked someone why and they said, wow, it's
Groutchow's ninety ninth birthday would have been in ninety ninth
birthday today, all right. I said, I'm a huge fan
of the Marx Brothers. In fact, my parents probably said
that because I was too shy. He loves the Marx Brothers.
(17:30):
And they went, oh, well, we're actually doing a grout
show sounderlike competition today and we don't have enough people
to enter. Do you want to get up on stage
and say one line as Groucho Marx and as a prize,
we'll give your family like a free day in Universal Studios. Yeah, okay,
I'm in like a feeler tracksuit. And there were three competitors.
(17:54):
The other two were dressed as Grout show mark there's
some Aussie kids. So musy Kid puts on a Groucho
glasses and and the line was, oh, one morning, I
shot an elephant in my pajamas. How are we going
to my pajamas? I'll never know? That was the line.
That's actually a pretty good impression. But was it that
(18:15):
good at nineteen? It actually was. It wasn't too bad
at nineteen, actually, I thought, and I think they were expecting.
You know, this is in the days of just after
Crocodile Dundee, so I think they thought it was going
to be a one day I saw a crocodile. Lem
me Jim jams, so that's not an elephant. This is
an elephant. So I did it, and they said, hey,
(18:39):
you congratulations. Your family went a day in the park.
But one of the judges was Groucho Martz's son, who
was a screenwriter and also a champion tennis player.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
And then hang on, aute, this is all too much
so with your past as a former tennis coach and
now you're a fan of Groutcher marks you in front
of his son, who also happens to be a tennis coach.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
Yes, yeah, and was like a championship tennis player, played professionally.
So my mum has a photo and I I said,
get a pot, get a foot. So I'm chatting to
Groucho Marx's son about tennis, and my mum took a photo.
But it's one of those ones where I'm mid conversation
and I've got this really weird face and it's not
(19:18):
you know. Now you go, oh, that didn't work out.
Take another photo on your phone. Take five, get a burst.
The only photo of me with Groudchow Marxes. I can't
even You'll have to describe this face. I'm basically going,
you don't know, having a stroke.
Speaker 1 (19:35):
Always part of your Groucho impression. I don't know, it's
hard to tell. Wow, that's it. That's your only lasting
memory of it.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Only photo of me with Groutchow, Marx's son. I'm pulling
a ridiculous face. So where is the country. There's an
extra story added to it. So I bought it in
Adelaide and it was on my wall in Adelaide, and
then I had it in storage in Adelaide for ages,
and then I was going back doing the Adelaide fringe
one year and I thought, you know what, I'm going
to take a couple of things back to Sydney, back
to my parents' place, and the frame will be one
(20:02):
of those. And Ross Noble, I just got to know
Ross Novo, the English comedian. And Ross came out to
me one night and he went, what are you doing
after this? And I said, I'm going back to Sydney actually,
and he went how are you getting to Sydney? And
I said, well, I'm driving and he went can I
come with you? What? And he said, I've got a
flight to Melbourne, but I've just been booked on a
TV show in Sydney and he went I couldn't be
(20:23):
asked booking a flight. Can I come with you? And
I went yeah, but it's like it's a two day drive.
We're gonna have to stop somewhere overnight and he went
is it a road trip? And he went how good's
your car? And I said, well, it'll get us there,
and he went normal, is it all enough that we
could chainsaw off the top and drive it like we're
in a feminine hygiene ad? And I said to Uss, no,
(20:49):
I'm not changed. Sorry at the top off my car all?
And then he went can we wear cowboy hats and
listen to Chris Christophus and tips, yes we can. So
we turned out two days later with two cowboys and
a country in Western Cassette because he couldn't find Chris
Christophers specifically, and we loaded up this car with his
(21:12):
stuff and my stuff and this Groucho Marks frame and
we drove. We decided we were going to stop at all
the big things. I had to explain how there are
these big, you know, tourist attractions across Australia. Our favorite
to this day. We were talking about it recently. Norandra.
And what I love about Nerandre is, you know, you
drive into town and hey, home are the big Prawn
and home of the big you know, pineapple or whatever.
(21:33):
You're driving to Norandra and there was a sign, massive
sign welcome to Norandra, home of the world's second largest
playable guitar, which in itself is funny. One hundred meters
down the road there's an old, dilapidated sign that's half
falling off and faded that says welcome to Norandra, home
(21:55):
of the world's largest playable guitar. Only in Australia. That's amazing,
saddest and funniest, brilliant. But this whole trip, that contract
has been with me, you know, through everything, and that
is that is my most certainly my most prized comedy
(22:19):
cool thing to have. It's amazing. But yeah, to have
that little piece of history as as a comedy fan
and as a Marx Brothers fan, I don't think I'll
get any better than that, There's no way. So the
third item was the trickiest one because I really was
(22:40):
thinking hard about if everything, all of my possessions were destroyed,
what are the positions. So I've got the rabbit, that's
my family connection, and then the comedy connection is the contract.
And the object that I'd really want to keep is
a silk scarf that was given to me by the
Dalai Lama. So I was asked maybe ten years ago
(23:01):
to go to Perth and host a concert for his Holiness,
the Dalai Lama, and I think he was on a
speaking tour of Australia, and I think actually what happened
was they booked the venue in the morning for the speech,
they had it for the afternoon. Anyway, thought ah, I
may as well make some money out of let's put
on a concert for his Holiness and one of the
performers was Luca Bloom, Irish performer who who has done
(23:25):
a lot of stuff with the Dalai Lama, so there
was a connection there, but the rest of it was
like there was this weird band I think they were
called like the Nobel All Stars, and there was one
person dressed as Albert Einstein, and one person dressed as
Mother Teresa and one person dressed as quite super cool.
(23:46):
I think there was a moment where His Holiness met
the guy dressed as His Holiness, but then it was
like from memory, Tim Rodgers, the Baby Animals, Tex Perkins,
and it was really just to get a lot of
young people along to watch the bands. But before it
all kicked off, we told we would have a private
(24:08):
audience with His Holiness. So we were backstage in the
dressing room, all of us just kind of sitting around,
and then the Dalai Lama is brought in and sat
down and said a few words and then said are
there any questions. Everyone was like, I didn't know there
were question All I genuinely wanted to go is how
are you? And there are a few awkward moments, but
(24:29):
there was one thing that he said that really sort
out in his lovely way of speaking kind of said.
He said, I do not sing. I do not know music,
he said, but I do know. You have a microphone.
You should use it to see something. And what you
can see is nonviolence, not peace. And then this is
the joke that he made countries go to war for peace.
(24:51):
How can you fight for peace non violence? You cannot
fight for non violence, and then gave this beautiful speech.
So then the concert started and I think the Nobel
All Stars played first, and then Luca Bloom played a
beautiful song. I think I was just standing backstage, and
I knew that my job was to introduce His Holiness
onto the stage. And then you know, his minder came
up and said, would you walk out on stage with him? Please?
(25:15):
And I went, of course, I will, yes, of course,
And his Holiness came up and I shook his hand
and said a pleasure to meet you, and how are you?
I managed to ask how are you? And he said
I'm fine, and he had a bit of a sniffle,
and then his handler said, okay, it's time to go,
and he held my hand. He just held my hand
and we just walked out on stage together. The Dalai
Lama and I holding hands. I walked him to his
(25:37):
seat and he sat down and I said, good evening everyone,
and I got to make a joke to him. And
the joke was this so earlier that week Karl Stefanovic
had interviewed him yea, and they had been a big
thing because Karl had tried to tell him a joke.
And the joke was the Dalai Lama goes into a
pizza shop and orders a pizza and says, can you
make me one with everything? Not a bad joke, joke
(26:01):
if this is the important point, if you know what
a pizza shop is, or pizza toppings or are across
the dual meanings of the phrase make me one with everything,
and make me one with everything doesn't go to you know,
(26:22):
pizza apparently apparently a super supreme is not in his vocal.
Everyone was talking about it at the time because you know,
the Carl was like, the Dalai Lama goes to a
pizza shop, and then his translator goes pizza shop, pizza shop,
it is possible to continue, and then he tells the joke, says,
(26:46):
make me one with everything, and there's this massive pause.
No mine, it just didn't get it, like, why would you.
It's not even your set, it's probably your third or
fourth language. So anyway, Dallai Lung comes out, his Holiness
sits down. I open the show, good evening, blah blah blah.
This is what we're here for. And I said, your Holiness,
(27:08):
I am the only person on the bill who was
not a musician. I am a comedian, but I promise
I will not try to tell you a joke. And
there was a pause and I went, oh god, it
hasn't worked, and his translator let down, and then his
Holiness went, oh my god. It was like the count
from Sesame Street one bad job, and oh my god,
(27:31):
I've just made the Dalai Lama laugh in the most
Buddhist way possible by doing nothing. I didn't even tell
him a joke, and I made him laugh about the
joke that I'm not telling him. I mean, the concert
was beautiful. He only stayed for a couple of songs.
He stayed for Luca Bloom and then presented silk scarves
(27:52):
to everyone that was on stage. And I'm way over
the other side of the stage, knowing what my job is,
and his handler looked over at me and nodded, and
I went, oh, okay, coming to the end, and I
nodded back, and he went and shook his head and
went nodded, and then kind of motioned me to come over,
and I went, yeah, when it's done, or come over,
and he went, mmmm, he's doing with the hand gesture.
Once you get over here, you're crazy kid. And so
(28:14):
I came over to him, thinking, oh, okay, I was.
I was told the Dalai Lama would leave the stage
when he was ready and then I would pick up.
So I was coming over to kind of have the discussion,
and then he put his hand up to stop, and
then the Dalai Lama picks up a silk scarf and
then he motioned me for me to come forward. Oh
my god, I'm getting a scarf. I'm being given a
blessing and a scarf from his holiness. It's incredible. Oh,
(28:36):
it was really, really lovely. I love the idea of spirituality,
and there is something about and I've spoken to other
people about this, when you're in the presence of the
Dalai Lama, you feel that for a few days afterwards.
I don't know what it is, you know, the synic
in me goes, well, I'm just projecting because I know
it's you know, he's just a simple person. He would
say that I'm just a Buddhist monk, but you kind
of feel energetic. Yeah, there's something about him. So that scarf,
(28:59):
as well as being a pro possession is also an
important part of my life. Is that that spiritual side
and that that energy side. When you work with energy
and meditation and whatever it is, whether it's you know,
tai chi or whatever it is that puts you in
the kind of flow of the universe. Where Robb Legal
have done that four years, well look at what that transformed.
(29:19):
I do you know what I mean? I kind of
feel like this whole journey with Rugby League from me
helping this team and then going let's film it for
a documentary. I mean, that could have been anything. We
could have been the worst team in Britain. We could
have just been middle of the road. The way the
whole story came together where the Rabbit O's my boyhood
team became the best team in Australia, we became the
(29:39):
best team in the UK. I got knocked out at
one point. It provided a bit of drama. We came
to Australia became world champions. We played on Fathers to
all of that. You know, I genuinely believe that if
you're open to the universe, then you can kind of connect.
You know. Taoism will often talk about it black being
a river. You can't control it, but if you just
(30:00):
let yourself go and let it carry you, you'll avoid
the rocks. It'll take you where you need to be.
And I think in a comedy sense, and especially when
you're at libbing, you know, you just get a sense
from the audience. You get a sense from looking at
people who's going to be good value. I remember doing
a show where there are a bunch of and this
is a really formative, you know, comedy point for me.
(30:22):
There are a bunch of butchers in the front row.
And now I grew up on a gift and I
remember this table of butchers and I was comparing the
show and I just I put them down. I did
five minutes of jokes, putting them down for being butchers.
Brought on the first act and they heckled him until
he had to leave the stage. And I remember sitting
backstage going wow, where did that negative energy come from?
And thought, oh, me, like in that whole raiki sense.
(30:44):
So I just went out and put negative in. I
just told them their jobs were worthless. Of course they're
going to tear apart the next person on stage. What
are you thinking? So I went back out on stage
and then virtually apologized, but in a funny way, and
tried to think of, Okay, what would be what would
they hate about their job with people like me? And
and I actually said to me, you must hate people
(31:04):
like me. You slave all day over the perfect cut
of meat. You try and trim the fat, you get
the right and you know exactly how it should be cooked,
and then you sell it to some idiot like me,
who you know is going to burn it on a
barbecue until it's black. And they laughed and they were like, yes,
that is oh man, there is no need to be negative.
(31:25):
I even rewrote one of my jokes at the time,
which was the joke was and I've done it plenty
of times, but I used to say, look, I hate
American people because they name their children after personality traits.
They hope they're going to grow up with our faith.
Have you seen help the Ana? And they're waiting for
charity And then I'd go on and say, you know,
can you imagine an Aussi bloke name and his kids
the way he hopes they're going to grow up. This
(31:46):
is my son opening Batsman, that's my other son drinks beer, etc.
And about this time I kind of went, why am
Why am I saying I hate Americans. I'm just saying
that because that's what you say to say up a joke.
There's absolutely no reason for me to say I hate
I could and I rewrote the joke. I I love
Americans because they know that children have to presidentality. It
(32:09):
was just comedy at the time, was let's take everybody down.
You know, sure you can go on a stage and
take down whoever needs taking down, and you don't need
to say I hate Americans or you butcherser eiots or whatever,
just because that's what people do. You can lift people
up with comedy. So that's you know, that's that scarf. Weirdly,
you know that idea of if you've got a microphone,
(32:29):
use it to say something. You know, if you can
be positive, be positive.
Speaker 1 (32:38):
Thank you very much too. Today's legend Adam Hills. He
has something that makes us all a bit larger in ourselves.
I mean that some people light you up, and that
is what Adam Hills does. What I loved was the
way that each of his items came back to those
things that truly matter to him, his family, Rugby comedy.
Speaker 2 (32:56):
I think rugby is above comedy.
Speaker 1 (32:57):
Actually, even though he's a professional comedian, Spirituality and what's
most important, and he got to bring a lot of
that together by telling the Dalai Lama, a joke not
many of us can say that. Make sure you don't
miss any of our upcoming legends. Follow the show for
free on iHeartRadio or whatever podcast app you're listening to
(33:18):
us on right now. I'm Christian O'Connell. Thanks for listening.
Until next time. This is the stuff of legends.
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