Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:09):
I Heart Podcasts. You can hear more gold one I
four point.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Three podcasts, playlist and listen live on the free iHeart.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
App Got anything good?
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Hey, this is the Christian O'Connell show podcast.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
I am definitely a loser. Yes.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
The shame member was talking about how last week I
was supposed to be going to Ikea of the weekend
and I.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
Did a deal with the devil. I said, hey, why
don't we do that on Monday when it's quieter. Monday
was as today? Is the devil your wife in this situation?
Not quite clear. It's like I said, everything's coming in
hot right now. Am I the devil?
Speaker 2 (00:47):
It's the Swedish. I'm not sure who is the devil
in the story.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
To be honest, the devil is in the detail and
in this story.
Speaker 2 (00:54):
Anyway, yesterday I had to go to Ikea after the show.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
No, I was alex Yes.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
I was angry and apparently there was no time for
me to prefeed there. I have to be honest, I
had one of the worst public mountdowns ever had Toddler.
It was like a fifty something Toddler. Basically, it was bad.
I could apologize to my wife. I don't know, I can't.
I can't get out of this.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
No, I meant I can't get out of this.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
The big thing I did right. My wife is constantly
running late. So I got there like before her, and
I need to get a desk for myself. So I
think Art just pop into the we were there to
do clicking clients. I thought, artis quickly go upstairs to
the showroom. Shocking shock out.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Oh my god. So I first of all takes stages, that.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
Labyrinth going round like Narnia. Just just go see where
the office desk were. I see two or three I
like a coach at the photos and the strange names.
And then I go to an employee, how do I
get out of here as quick as possible? I said,
I see you just came out that door there, and
she went on, it's not a customers Well, what's through
(02:08):
the other side door?
Speaker 1 (02:09):
A slide down the carbark? Yes, there are doors these doors. Yeah,
I saw her just come out of the door. She went,
don't go through that door.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
I was trying to run through it, but you tackle
me fire Swedish meatballs at me. She was going to
go she was. She said to me, you need to
get back on the path. And follow the arrows and
don't come off the path.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
I was hanging a minute.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
If I'm back on that path, I'm going to be
going through everywhere in the house.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
That's the toilets, kitchens, the bathrooms. I only came to
look at office.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
They must do research about you spend extra money with
that windy wine everywhere, Yes.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
And doing it to you. But you still can't help.
But you're like, I know you're making me go through
the coat hanger section, and this is a deliberate plot,
but I do need someone all the way they got.
I did buy some co.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Yes with a kind of nice rounded shoulder.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
Yes. I don't like it when you use a hanger
and it leaves that too sharp pre yes.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Yes, yes that especially on a knitted well the good
for the good people are kid they've rounded it out
there in Sweden and that so anyway, so I was
already annoyed.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
Once I finally got out there, my wife or I shot,
my god, are you okay? I went no, I'm not.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
I saw the desk, but I saw hell keet back out.
It wouldn't let me go through. There's a side door.
It's like Disneyland. Those employees they come out of like
hidden doors and trap doors.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
So and then and then too, because.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
They used to work out where to go and get
this clicking collect The woman goes, you got a PEE
two And when I'm sorry, I don't work here.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
What is P two?
Speaker 2 (03:48):
It's not like a universal thing, she goes, it's the
second level of the car park.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
Again, we're going down to hell.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
I go down there right and an elderly couple come
up to me mistake me for my manager. At first,
I was just confused because they were very distressed and
old people just by blurt stuff out.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
They didn't say hello, it's like yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
I was trying to side down and going, what what's
happening here right now? And so they had like a
really long receipt and I was like, wait, do you
think I'm a manager? And she was like yes, and
your team and not. I was this close to going,
do you know what? You're quite right? Let me just
sign this here and authorize it, go and help go
and get whatever you want from the showroom and load up.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
Just said.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Derek said it's fine, the general manager of VIK Springville.
So I kind of like snapped and said I'm not
the manager, and walked off, and then I felt really
bad and I saw that they were then they must
have been their late seventies. They were then struggling with
a load of flatback into I can't. I went over
and said, hey, do you need a hand with this,
and and they were like, oh no, no, it's quite right
to bother you doing your own stuff. Then I said, no, no,
(04:52):
let me let me help put it in the car.
These old people, right, I went, you've got so much stuff.
You'd have stuff by now at your age. They were like,
we're driving to Tasmania now with all this, my God spirit,
yes to go and make out their place?
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Yes, what yeah came from?
Speaker 2 (05:10):
And then then I went, oh my god, you to
a hardcoren that went we just finished playing tennis, playing tennis,
and they tried to Tasmania with a load of this.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
There's no Ikea in Tasmania, so I said.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
You come a long way to Springvale, Victoria. What I said,
if you're not got they've not got dial up internet
over there on the island. There must be an Ikea
in Tasmania. There's no footy team there, no Ikea. There
must be an Ikea in Tasmania.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
It has to be.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Tasmania collect but you can't go to all day.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
I kept thinking about.
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Lord driving back to Tasmania and then wait when they
get there, they can put it all together. One was
a bed and they said it was their new bed.
So they had to drive home and make the bed
to sleep in that night.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
Pay tennis. They're in better shake me.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
They paid tennis in the morning these old times, their
late seventies.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
There must be tennis courts in Tasman. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
They know on that affl stadium they want tennis and
they do not what ikea furniture as well. So anyway,
by the time I didn't go back to my wife,
I put all our stuff in the car and it
was a lot.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
You know, it's yesterday.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
I said, there was like a bed better terms, there
was no room for me in the car.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
Yeah, we told you that.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
I then had to go and basically stand at the
side of five way. I try an uber and I
was just outside and I care. I fell on the
guy goes if you escape from and I went kind
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