FULL: A Dog Can't Do CPR

Can Dogs Perform CPR, Did you piff something, The Misheard Lyrics, The Timewaster and Empty Nesters!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Got anything good.

Speaker 2 (00:02):
Hey, this is the Christian O'Connell show podcast.

Speaker 1 (00:10):
Good morning Patsy, Morning boys, Good morning Jack. Hi you
guys very good. Just quickly before we get in today's show,
I was just saying new word, Jack, Patsy, you know
what the words skidaddle means?

Speaker 3 (00:19):
Don't you get on your way? Off you go?

Speaker 1 (00:21):
Yeah? I thought this was a well known universal word
that isn't old timing in anyway. Yesterday we were dropping
our daughter off at college and she was with a
group of other fresh face, excitable and slightly overwhelmed eighteen
year olds, and I said to her, hey, listening, mum,
and are I going to go now? We're just going
to skidaddle And she looked at me like skidaddle and

(00:43):
I went, everyone knows. I look around these eighteen year
olds and they all looked at me like, hey, time traveler,
what year have you come from with these crazy old words?

Speaker 4 (00:53):
I thought, skiddle, yeah, say as well, yes, so we're
losing that.

Speaker 1 (00:57):
From the Some words need protecting, this says to me.
And skid out or is another one along with befuddled.

Speaker 3 (01:06):
Oh I haven't heard that one.

Speaker 1 (01:07):
Oh, befuddled is a great word when you're confused comes
a bit befuddled right now.

Speaker 3 (01:12):
I'm constantly befuddled, Yes, exactly.

Speaker 1 (01:14):
So it's a great world. I now know how you're
how you're feeling this weekend. Jack and Dinah know right
what was the surprise? Friday? You were telling us there
was going to be a big surprise when we were
speculating where you off to that sex show?

Speaker 4 (01:26):
And I was desperate to know all of Saturday. I
kept asking Banker, please just tell me what it was.
It's actually making me feel sick in my stomach not
knowing what we were doing.

Speaker 1 (01:34):
Now, what was it not knowing? Was it worrying about
you reacting accordingly and upsetting her?

Speaker 4 (01:38):
I think it was Honestly, I couldn't think of many
moments in my life.

Speaker 5 (01:42):
I was like, where I have a lack.

Speaker 4 (01:44):
Of control like that, And it was really making me uncomfortable,
not knowing what we would be and not.

Speaker 5 (01:48):
Knowing what to prepare my body for. And I said
that to her, She's like, what do you mean prepare
your body for? We're just going out for the night.
It's not a big deal.

Speaker 1 (01:56):
And we were given a bit of a dress code
as well.

Speaker 4 (01:59):
Yeah, she said dress cool and snazzy yep, so dressed
in a T shirt and jeans.

Speaker 1 (02:06):
I've never seen that look like always a T shirt
T shirt. Wow.

Speaker 5 (02:12):
She wouldn't even show me.

Speaker 4 (02:13):
So we drove and she wouldn't even show me the
directions on her phone, so like take left here, you
go right right, and until we ended up in Saint
Kilda at the Alex Theater. And it wasn't until I
was lining up that I realized that we were going
to see Cruel Intentions, the nineties musical Oh wow. And
I will say I will say it was a bold

(02:34):
choice by her because I love music.

Speaker 1 (02:39):
PENSI had to farmer as a surprise, take out the
surprise you ain't going I.

Speaker 5 (02:44):
Think that's what I think. It was packaging.

Speaker 1 (02:46):
What a smart way to get what you want. This
is going to be an amazing surprise.

Speaker 3 (02:51):
Package is a gift, but like taking a dog to
the bit.

Speaker 1 (02:54):
Yes, we're going out for an amazing trip somewhere.

Speaker 4 (02:58):
And I started as we got clos from listen to
the theater, I started to scratch on the doors and
try to jump.

Speaker 5 (03:02):
Out of the boot.

Speaker 4 (03:04):
But I will say I really enjoyed it, so it
surprised me. They did do the thing which I hated
musicals where they put the house lights up and try
to get you to sing along with the songs.

Speaker 1 (03:16):
We don't want to sing your singing to musical? Is
it connected to the movie?

Speaker 4 (03:21):
Yes, which I've never seen before, So it was that
is bold. Sorry if that seems like has gone Oh
this is one of your favorite movies. Watching the play,
I've never seen it before. I don't know anything about it. Wow,
but at least the music in it, it's not original songs.
It's all nineties those songs that we you know, we

(03:43):
play a bunch of them on here. There was like
no doubt and sing Backstreet boys, that kind of thing.

Speaker 1 (03:50):
Gold the musical probably why I love this like a
working holiday.

Speaker 5 (03:54):
I expected suit to be sitting just in the road
behind us.

Speaker 1 (03:57):
And did you enjoy it? Was it good?

Speaker 5 (03:58):
It was really good.

Speaker 4 (04:00):
The only problems we had one girl sitting next to
us who said, this is my ninth time coming to
see call intentions of musical.

Speaker 5 (04:07):
I love it, I love it, I love it.

Speaker 4 (04:08):
But then she poured a bit of cold water on
it by saying it used to be at the Athenaeum,
which is a big, big venue, and now they've brought
it back and this this version is a little bit
watered down.

Speaker 5 (04:19):
It's like, what do you mean. She's like, oh, they
used to have moving sets.

Speaker 4 (04:22):
And they there was more casts and now it's sort
of like a junior version of that.

Speaker 5 (04:27):
Like oh, okay, well we were really this is in
the intermission.

Speaker 1 (04:31):
She was and it was happy with her surprise received.

Speaker 5 (04:36):
She loved no, well, she was happy with the night.

Speaker 4 (04:38):
That is her bread and butter, nineties music, getting to
dress up and musicals. They're all her favorite things. So
she had a ball.

Speaker 1 (04:46):
So you know what you need to do now return
the favor. You need to plan a Jack.

Speaker 4 (04:49):
Surprise, Yes, but it has then it should be something
that I really love.

Speaker 1 (04:54):
Ye, people go to opening around of the footy or something. Yeah,
Bombers Underwoman, Game of the Season.

Speaker 2 (05:03):
A Christian O'Connell show podcast.

Speaker 1 (05:05):
Christian O'Connell Show. So big weekend for my wife and
I and our eighteen year old daughter. We moved her
out of home into college accommodation yesterday. I woke up
yesterday morning very very activated because all my attention and
I was focusing all my energies on two things over
the weekend. One hours on making the ultimate playlist for

(05:26):
her that I gave her last night. She was okay,
she was like, she was like, there's nothing sad on here.
There's only it's only up tunes, only up vibes.

Speaker 5 (05:34):
I'll give us some examples of what was on there.

Speaker 1 (05:36):
Good ridden's timing life by Green. And then it was
about packing all her stuff into the car, so she
didn't want my wife and I pack and all that
stuff up. She said, I need to know I've got
to get this right now, okay, because I'm going to
be alone. They're at Universe and you're only forty minutes away.
You're know how and we're not dropping it off out
in the bush. You know, you're two minutes from a

(05:58):
tram stop. It's not You're not going to compete with
bear grills for this this year at some wilderness camp the.

Speaker 4 (06:04):
Way you've been talking about last this week, someone actually
asked me, yesday, it's like, where's she going if she's
going to be in Alaska or Canada or so, she's
twenty five minutes away I think from the CD in
the city.

Speaker 1 (06:15):
So it was a big thing for Mife and I
because obviously she's the last to go so you know,
he was like, it's not going to be the same
even that she can come home from where she wants.
So I got up yesterday morning at six am right
and started to my wife is like, what do you do?
I'm going to go and pack the car right now.
She was, she doesn't want us leave until ten am.
What is a Carnegie be packed at six am? Went,
I just want to get used every because there was

(06:37):
a lot actually looked like she was never coming back.
There was like way too much stuff, way too much stuff.
So packed the car up. That was all like half six.
She comes down at like half eight and she's like,
I'm like, can you come and check out the car?
She said, Dad, we're not leaving for an hour and
a half. Please you just slow it all down. Yesterday
was when we dropped all off there. There was about
one hundred and I think it must have been one

(06:58):
hundred and eighty two hundred other eight teen year olds,
mainly ninety five percent of these kids where she's staying
in this Hall of Residence are from outer State, so
a lot of them are from around Australia. They all
look quite nervous. Some of them would come from sort
of farm regions. There was a lot of wide eyed
couple of bumpkins, you know in the big smoke for
the first time. Whoa, it's like Patsy so like two

(07:19):
or three story buildings, bloody jack. Yet there was a
lot of but telling you what being around all those
eighteen year olds, they're nervous, energy and excitement. I was
jeaneous as a part of me that I want to
be starting a new adventure eighteen again. And it's all
all ahead of them, the potential.

Speaker 5 (07:38):
They're on the brink of it all.

Speaker 1 (07:39):
Yes, it could feel there was this nervous chatter. That's
what there was. Right, We're all having lunch together and
there was this nervous chatter there, and you know, kids
were trying to suck each other out. Who might be friends,
who's a possible threat, who's a bit quiet, who's excavated?
Which gang do I look like I belong to that
part of gang? It was all that like it is
in life. And I noticed the mums and dads we're
doing the same thing. Some of the mums and dads

(08:02):
were like wallflowers by the side of the wall. My
wife was just in her element, just marching through it
all and like attracting peech o. Wife left with five
new mobile numbers of other moms there, like, there's no
you've got time to see all these new women. One
of the dads actually said to me that I gotten
really well from hour. He just simply said, in a
very ausy dad way, there's a really nice meeting. I'm
probably never going to see you again. I like the honesty.

(08:24):
I really like the honesty. There's no point I was
getting phone on us. We're never going to see each
other again, but for the last hour and a half,
it's a bit in a really really nice chat. So anyway,
we dropped her off and we scanned out and got
out there. We get home and I said to my wife,
how how are you know? How are you going to
be tomorrow morning? I'm not going to be here. You're
going to wake up an empty house. She goes. Last week,
my wife's strategy in dealing with all this was to

(08:46):
wait for this. Imagine it wasn't happening. Now it has,
and it's actually it's happened. Right. There's just the two
of us, and there were just two plates for dinner
last night. Even that was a moment. My goodness is
two plates, and I said to my wife, how are
you going to be tomorrow morning? She goes, I'm now
going to pretend that she's simply gone to earn holiday
for a bit. I'm like, look, when do you actually
meet reality?

Speaker 2 (09:07):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.

Speaker 1 (09:10):
The Christian O'Connell Show. On today's show, we got your
brand you miss her lyrics at eight this year. No
more am I allowed now to simply wander aim the
c around a supermarket doing the weekly shop. Whether now
two kids costing a lot of money with their living
expenses at university, we have to manage to our budget
a bit more, and so I will waste a lot
of time and money just wandering around a supermarket. I

(09:32):
did something for the first half. I've never done this before.
A lot of you probably already do this. I didn't
know there's a thing you could pre order your weekly
shop and then just go and pick up director boots.

Speaker 5 (09:41):
I've never tried it before. But the time when you
park there is the clicking cass.

Speaker 1 (09:46):
You literally drive into a parking bay, you open the
boot and then some young kids come out start loading
all your shopping in. Right, you didn't get out of
the car and then you just drive off.

Speaker 5 (09:56):
So do you how do you pay?

Speaker 1 (09:57):
Oh?

Speaker 5 (09:57):
You do it online? Yes, sounds so and I know
how it works online shopping.

Speaker 1 (10:03):
So yeah, do you do that? Pats here?

Speaker 3 (10:05):
Now I've never done it.

Speaker 1 (10:06):
My god, it's a brave new world.

Speaker 3 (10:08):
I like to talk to people.

Speaker 6 (10:10):
You know. You see the same checkout lady each week,
had a lovely chats are about to do?

Speaker 1 (10:15):
They want to talk to you, of course. I see
those people that waste. Those people are busy. They've got
stuff to do. There's a supervisor back and going, Steve.
We've got to rotate. We've got to rotate the shelf stuff.
You've got to move the hands around. There's always that.
Only time it's got too much time is low.

Speaker 6 (10:30):
He's a human art of communication and it doesn't hurt
to speak to someone, albeit for one or two minutes.

Speaker 1 (10:42):
Like they're never just hanging around, right, there's always stuff
to put out. Those trolleys were like loads of more
Nest Cafe or Nest quick. They've got to get out
on the shelf. You've got to do that. I've worked
on those jobs. You've got to do all the stop
rotation where they move the stuff, you know, around some
of that, and there's someone they going, how are you? Malcolm?
Is your mum bed? And now I'm missus Jones wants

(11:04):
to have to work late tonight, cancel my date.

Speaker 4 (11:08):
I took Gordy to the supermarket last night, which is
good fun because he gets his own wheelly trolley, you know,
and they got the basket and then they've got the
wheelie baskets and it's so cute watching him go around
the shells and he's trying to put stuff in, and
I'm letting him put stuff in there, and then as
he's not looking, trying to put it back on the
shelf again.

Speaker 1 (11:24):
And what does he like to try and put into anything?

Speaker 5 (11:27):
Shiny I always a big favorite of his.

Speaker 4 (11:30):
Put the cake mix in, put the cookie mix in,
put the sprinkles in. But then he's also a bit random.
We had barbecue tongs and this is.

Speaker 1 (11:38):
Just is literally how I shop. That is literally how
I shop. You barbecue tongs? Why not? They're on sailor
as well.

Speaker 4 (11:45):
So he's your wife behind you slowly putting things from.

Speaker 1 (11:49):
The little boy basket. She's got the big one.

Speaker 2 (11:52):
The Christian O'Connell show podcast, Good Mine, Good Mine, Good
Mining good mining.

Speaker 1 (12:00):
Do perhatsy Before we get into the good morning minute,
I just want to check in and see how things
are with you and the werribe laugh, God, what is
what are the plans?

Speaker 7 (12:09):
Now?

Speaker 1 (12:09):
That very quick there, I pitched up in the throat.

Speaker 6 (12:13):
Fine, well, no, no, no, it's all good. No, don't
make a storm.

Speaker 3 (12:18):
In a teacup. It's all good. He are you'll be
going to rods on is it.

Speaker 5 (12:23):
This weekend or the weekend?

Speaker 1 (12:24):
For when?

Speaker 3 (12:25):
Is it the weekend following weekend?

Speaker 1 (12:26):
I thought it's a very significant dn't be wedding anniversa?
I mean we heard a lot about it last week.
Now you don't even know when it is. It's a
bit vague.

Speaker 6 (12:33):
Well no, no, I said, you know what I can
see where your heart light lies. You really want to
go with the boys for your six month catch up.
So off you go, fly, Birdie fly, spread your wings
be free.

Speaker 1 (12:47):
So like you said, everything fine, yeah, yep, and I'll
be going away. Are you going?

Speaker 6 (12:52):
I don't know yet, but anywhere I am off and
again wherever are?

Speaker 1 (12:57):
This is how fine?

Speaker 8 (12:59):
Is?

Speaker 1 (12:59):
It's all here? You go? You fly sinister, you fly,
Birdie fly, Well you get shut out the sky by
mysterious shooter.

Speaker 6 (13:11):
You know, I don't want to make him push him
to a dinner that he doesn't really feel like going to.

Speaker 3 (13:17):
So that's all right.

Speaker 1 (13:17):
I was so bad, I asked, I actually don't think
it's worse than where we were Friday. So he's off
with Rod? Is mate? Rod on your way? Love it?

Speaker 6 (13:31):
You should have seen the pathetic expression in his face
that he gave me Friday.

Speaker 3 (13:36):
It was like, can I adjust? Go already?

Speaker 1 (13:39):
I'm stunned. I thought after last week Chris is smart
enough he would have fell into this and we're gone. Look,
it's crazy. I can see Rod any other weekend. Le's
of course we're going to do something wedding anniversary, but
he's doubling down. Where do you go the way?

Speaker 6 (13:52):
Can I just say there's nothing that diamonds can't fix, boys,
nothing that a bit of bling can't fix.

Speaker 5 (14:00):
I hope they do that at office work.

Speaker 1 (14:07):
All right? Time for the good morning minute. This is
where you text in let us know where you are,
what your name is, and what are you up to
Right now We're trying to say good morning to have
many of you as possible. The text someone for us
is four seven five three one oh four three, Good morning,
minute coming up next? Where are you watch? Your name?
And what are you up to right now?

Speaker 2 (14:29):
The Christian O'Connell show podcast. Good morning, good morning, good morning,
good morning.

Speaker 8 (14:37):
Do you.

Speaker 1 (14:39):
All right? Jack and Pats? Are you ready with your
new way of working together and saying good morning? Yes?

Speaker 8 (14:45):
We guy?

Speaker 1 (14:46):
So who's leading? Who's following?

Speaker 5 (14:47):
That's his leading? I will follow.

Speaker 1 (14:49):
Perhaps you're ready to lead?

Speaker 3 (14:50):
Of course I am.

Speaker 1 (14:51):
Good stuff, Jackie, ready to follow. Let's see. Let's see,
okay team. Good morning to Kathy and Dash the Border Collie.
Oh hey Kathy and Dash.

Speaker 5 (15:05):
Good morning, guys.

Speaker 1 (15:07):
Off for their post Jim morning walk in morning, Tim, Wow,
that is productive. Already you've done the gym workout. It's
not even seven am. Good morning to Norell on the
Humor heading to work. Morning, Come morning to Anthony in Morabin.
Just finished loading up the truck with white goods. Hopefully
it's going to be done around lunch time today. Good morning,

(15:28):
just a bit more, coming to a bit more simply
just a four. Are you a chief exec walking around
who doesn't know the colleagues names? Good morning, Come on,
another great day at the company, being productive, isn't it good? Morning, Derek.

Speaker 5 (15:38):
I'm too focused on the right.

Speaker 1 (15:41):
This is your tense, poor old Eddie. Eddie, I hope
everything's all right. Ellie couldn't even text in the word
good g Od, it's this going to be the good
good morning? On my way to work again, Ellie. In Cregbon,
you're in one of those rinse repeat faces. Yeah. Interesting,

(16:07):
I'm Luke. It's a stranger saying, you know, I'm Luke
waiting for anaconda Mini marks who open so I can
get a coffee? Oh that's right, Okay. Good morning to Troy,
our friend over in w Ways in Bumbury, listening to
the show. Troy, he was Bunnings yesterday with his three
year old grandson Christian. Jack was right about when you
take a young kids shopping at Bunnings. It was like

(16:29):
going around with a shopping with a small goat the damage.
That's a great way to phrase it, Troy.

Speaker 4 (16:35):
Yeah, you look back when you get to the end
of the rle, you look back at the path of
the destruction.

Speaker 1 (16:39):
Little Billy go just butting things off the shell. Morning
to Sam driving up to a chooka today from Bendigo.

Speaker 3 (16:47):
Beautiful, Hi Sam.

Speaker 5 (16:48):
Good morning.

Speaker 1 (16:49):
I'm still sticking with that. Good Morning the cut and
paste one from Jack and Sarah in Bundora. Good morning
Sarah in Bundora.

Speaker 3 (16:55):
Hi Sarah, Good.

Speaker 5 (16:56):
Morning No.

Speaker 2 (17:00):
No o'condal show podcast Patsy.

Speaker 1 (17:03):
After hearing in your news how a third of people
have more photos of their pets on their phone than
their family, I imagine that participating on this show. That's
one hundred percent Young Master Henry on there. I'm guessing
ninety nine percent of them. Please tell us about what
you had to do at the weekend with your mammoth dog, Presley.

Speaker 3 (17:23):
This is crazy.

Speaker 6 (17:24):
So we are in the hunt for a new doggie kennel.
Our old one is closing. They're retiring, so we have
to find him another one. Anyway, Alvit referred us to
this amazing kennel which is like twenty minutes away from
our house. This place is like the Beverly Hills of

(17:44):
doggie kennel's.

Speaker 3 (17:44):
You've got no idea. It is purpose built. It is
like a.

Speaker 1 (17:51):
You'd like to think of purpose built. Now.

Speaker 5 (17:53):
They just rocked up to the building. It's like all
this dog stuff.

Speaker 6 (17:57):
No, but like specially designed. It is crazy. So we've
pulled up and there's like to one side they've got
the cattery, and then on the opposite side there's like
six wings for dogs.

Speaker 3 (18:09):
They each t oh, you should.

Speaker 1 (18:11):
Say, which like a prison bee wings that the lifers
that they're banging their bowl on the bar, singing anger
term for the blues.

Speaker 6 (18:21):
They've got their own massive, massive quarters, so a room
that's tiled. They've got a risen heated bed.

Speaker 1 (18:31):
Dogs and also right as much we love our dogs
and that you know what if you see a place
at that or we think I was like, we don't
even get to have a night, or when the place
says how much is this for the dog?

Speaker 3 (18:41):
This was this was the thing.

Speaker 6 (18:42):
So we turned up and Chris said, I actually wouldn't
mind staying here, like.

Speaker 3 (18:44):
This is room insane?

Speaker 1 (18:46):
Well, it probably is. You're probably dropping him off and
here need news ring as well. They're dropping him off.
Van Presley Prasley wasn't even in the car. Is gonna
be so happy to get out, Chris, don't make it
worse for both of.

Speaker 3 (18:58):
Us and roll anyway.

Speaker 6 (19:00):
They've even got their own pool, like a doggie pool.

Speaker 3 (19:04):
I am serious.

Speaker 6 (19:05):
They're happy with a puddle poble insane. But the prizes
b oh yeah, but you know what we spin it for,
it's not actually that much more than.

Speaker 1 (19:16):
You tried to do. There's this online agency and people
come and stay in your house.

Speaker 6 (19:22):
I'm not sure about want other people sleeping in my
bed and stuff, doing stuff and nah, it's weird anyway.
So we had to get him to do what they
call an orientation stay to see that he fitted the bill,
like he had to be.

Speaker 1 (19:39):
They're auditioning him.

Speaker 6 (19:40):
Yeah, he had to be well behaved enough. And you
know he's a big dog, he's a giant.

Speaker 1 (19:45):
Maybe in the house then well.

Speaker 6 (19:47):
It's so funny. So he was in a bigger room
because he's such a big dog. But they've got instead
of a window, they had like a glass sliding door, right,
and they went out to him yesterday.

Speaker 1 (19:59):
More so did he stay the night there?

Speaker 6 (20:01):
He stayed the night. Had to stay the night. So
we can get looking for Christmas.

Speaker 3 (20:06):
Christmas the fact, do you even think that you've got
to jack if.

Speaker 1 (20:10):
You've got pants? Now, I get it. With dogs, you
got to get it sorted down. Always, there's no point
book on the holiday.

Speaker 3 (20:15):
It's like daycare.

Speaker 6 (20:16):
Now, it's like this coveted spot at this kennel anyway,
So they came out yesterday to feed him his breakfast,
and he had somehow opened the sliding door and he's
like running around.

Speaker 1 (20:29):
It's massive, yach and listeners, you might be news to
the show. They've got a last sue. That big old
dog donkey, this marimber Pats, he's got his shoe somehow
got out. He just moved his head forward and a
wall came.

Speaker 6 (20:42):
Down, let himself out.

Speaker 1 (20:45):
Calm at the dog.

Speaker 3 (20:46):
World, ridiculous.

Speaker 6 (20:48):
Anyway, when we went to the old place, he did
not like being dropped off, like you know, you'd always
feel really bad. He'd like go to run back to you,
and you feel so guilty.

Speaker 3 (20:57):
This place.

Speaker 6 (20:58):
As we're driving down the line driveway, he's like, looking.

Speaker 1 (21:01):
Back in my mind is like a stately home, isn't
it a big tree line sort of like a French avenue,
a vineyard out to the left.

Speaker 6 (21:08):
Yeah, he's like looking at the best Master Presley, Master Presley,
your steak is ready.

Speaker 1 (21:13):
It's amazing he got in. Yeah.

Speaker 6 (21:16):
Back, they're fully booked for Christmas.

Speaker 1 (21:21):
One of the newman's picking that monstrous hounder. No, we're
just double checked. Actually, yeah, fitting back, we're closing down
we're also retiring the other ones. You've got a trap
record of forcing people into a tie, closing out. We're
closing down actually, pot so you're going to look for another.

Speaker 6 (21:41):
Place now, No, no, this is only the best for
our boy. This is going to be I'm hoping. I'm
hoping people will.

Speaker 1 (21:48):
Drop exactly what you are going to do, just drop
them off.

Speaker 3 (21:51):
Anyway, bringing to your place. You've got an empty house.

Speaker 1 (21:54):
Now, actually spare bedroom, pats I'll give you mates race.
A'm taking that.

Speaker 2 (22:00):
The Christian O'Connell show podcast.

Speaker 1 (22:04):
Good luck with that dog situation, Patsy. Obviously we've got
a cat and a dog. We have to find like
a cattery for Big Larry. I remember in the early
part of the New Year this year some friends of
ours there were Swiss. They were back home visiting their
family back in Switzerland. They got a call from the cattery.
Right bear in mind, if you drop your cat off

(22:24):
at cattery with Christmas New Year, you're you're way somewhere.
And they were like, hey, listen you cat, Bubbles, it's
got crite diarya can you come back and get it?
And they were like, no, because we've booked it in
for three and a half weeks, it's your problem. Then
they texted me saying, hey, Bubbles has got squitch. Can
you come pick up wrong? And you know what? We

(22:44):
saw them Friday and they went, oh, you never applied
to that text and my wife My wife was like
what text? Didn't know anything about it? And I went,
you don't reply to a message like that. I'm not
going to go and get your squitting cats and then
give it a home for two weeks. We so cat's
that's not very much, not my problem. My wife was
like horrified. They went Christian didn't reply. No, there's no

(23:06):
reply needed for something like that. My answer is deafening
in silence. No, we just thought you hadn't got it. No,
I got it.

Speaker 5 (23:13):
Oh we got it.

Speaker 4 (23:14):
How many friends did they go through it before they
got a sucker to go?

Speaker 1 (23:18):
Jack at a sucker the cat place. This job is
to look after your cat. I mean, cats must get
squits when the cat house clear it up, give the medicine.
I don't know whatever you charge an extortion amount for,
but I mean it's a test of any friendship. One
helping someone move to picking up at the airport, picking
up a squiting cat and giving it a house for
two weeks. Yeah, it's no way, all right, So this

(23:41):
morning we're looking for your stories about piffing. Piffing in
case you don't know what the word means. It's a
great word. To piff something is to throw something. Maybe
you threw something at somebody, or somebody threw something at you.
This happened last week. I was having a delicious apple
in the middle of the afternoon. There's nice crisp ones,
you know, and it has this nice acidity to it,

(24:03):
right and after its I looked at the apple and
I thought, I can't bother to go and put this
in a bent. Why don't I open the front door
of my house. God not going on at the moment.
I don't open the front door of my house and
just piff this into the hedge. I thought I might
get some cathartic release. Anyway, the shot wasn't that great,
and it went over the hedge and into the oncoming
path of Mark, or a tired guy who was down

(24:23):
the road. It was just innocently walking his dog, and
so I saw, you know when you just go, oh God,
that's going towards that man. And I went apple, which
is in any way an understandable phrase and was like
everyone knows the drill. Kids. If you ever hear someone
yell apple, someone has piffed an apple for no good
reason in the middle of the afternoon.

Speaker 5 (24:45):
As I calling four at a golf.

Speaker 1 (24:46):
Course, Yeah, marcolo apple. And then I actually jog over
and pick up my apple car and he went, why
do you throw that? I went, it's going to throw
it in the head. The explanation isn't really an explanation,
So hoopiff who?

Speaker 5 (25:03):
Who piffs?

Speaker 1 (25:04):
Who?

Speaker 5 (25:05):
Who piff?

Speaker 9 (25:06):
Who?

Speaker 1 (25:07):
Did you pift something? Or was it piff dand you
we're looking for your story is now of piffage nine
four one four one oh four three. Great email over
the weekend from Jodah and Christian regarding a story about
the Apple core incident. I have a story that I
witnessed at Melbourne Zoo as with my family at the
gorilla exhibition. There was a big group of us watching

(25:27):
a large gorilla going about his business. As we were
viewing him, he stopped. It appeared to be viewing all
of us scratching around in the dirt and grass in
front of him. He then became quite active and stood up,
run across the enclosure and held a clod of mud,
not unlike a cricketer. At the crowd. There was a
man in the crowd, taller than most and bald. The
gorilla loved the clod of mud, and it landed on

(25:50):
this man's head perfectly, like a wig, like a two page.
Everyone was incredulous and looking round at the now not
bald man. Everyone just started love. That's the only way, spot,
isn't it. I believe there's I'm with you anyway. Oh

(26:11):
my god, look at that slamped over there, this fun Christian.
He treated us as the exhibit rather than the other
way around. He piffed a wig, a mud wig and
a board man. That comes from. What a thing to see.
If you've been lucky enough to see some of that,
you never unsee it. Even on a tough day. You
can just recall that memory of Grina and it landing

(26:34):
perfectly on a board man's head. Jack, you've got a
piffage story.

Speaker 4 (26:37):
I've still got to fix a piffing gone wrong from
months ago. Now would have been last year that I
was cleaning up Luna's dog poos in the backyard in
one of the dog bags.

Speaker 1 (26:47):
Oh well, you stopped asking dad to come around and
do it.

Speaker 4 (26:49):
Yeah, I was doing it like I've grown up doing
it myself. And I thought, instead of walking up to
the bin to put it in, why did I throw
it down the driveway and.

Speaker 5 (26:59):
Then it'll be there next I be in the general
area like a shot put or something from.

Speaker 4 (27:05):
The backyard, and piffed it down the driveway. But it
gave it too much of an underarm. And it's on
the roof.

Speaker 1 (27:11):
Oh no, not finger on the roof. You go turn
on the roof.

Speaker 5 (27:15):
It's turned on.

Speaker 1 (27:21):
The roof visible from the It's so confusing if I
walk past house like so it's the dog up on
the roof with its owner and they were responsible, and
he's put it in the bag and just thought someone
will pick this up, and so get around to it.
Just say one of those fluffy ones. They get all fluffy.

Speaker 5 (27:44):
It's concealed.

Speaker 1 (27:47):
How can you sleep at night? Sax is going to
come with You can slip on.

Speaker 2 (27:51):
That Christian O'Connell show podcast.

Speaker 1 (27:57):
Looking for your piffed stories. You throw something so they
being thrown at you on nine four one four one
oh four three, Come on into Lucy Lang. My mother
in law lobbed a whole cake out of the window.
This story is so can I get the rage? My
mother in law lobed a whole cake out the window
after baking it because my father in law, her husband

(28:19):
didn't want any because he was too full, so she
threw the whole thing out the window. And then she
got even angrier because she hadn't saved us out apiece.
Sometimes the person we hurt the most as ourselves, Tracy,
my great Dane's tail piffed absolutely everything off my coffee
table once, include my great grandmother's favorite porcelain duck. Abby,

(28:42):
I piffed like I've never before, a hot dog from
the grandstand, and an umpire in the late eighties. Still
the most terrible cool I've ever seen it. A game
Let it go, Abby, Shane Christian. I've been on a
long haul flight just landed whilst waiting to right in
that phrase of a deep plane cabin doors check, I

(29:05):
opened the chocolate muffin they'd given out as a small breakfast.
I opened it a lot too hard and aggressively, because
it got piffed across the plane and hit another passenger
about eight ropes away in the head. Come ours at
a theme park in Queensland and a small group of
visitors who are being showing how to throw a native
wooden spear at a haybell. Christian was the first to throw,

(29:27):
much to my horror, my spear. So what are you
thinking letting untrained people with spearce My spare somehow hit
the bell, bounced backwards and struck the le person next
to me thankfully bounced off the bell kind of sideways
and lost a little momentum, so didn't seriously into the
person at all. This is a flesh wound. Shit be right,
and the group were understandably shocked. Let's take some calls

(29:50):
now you're piffing stories, Brad, good morning.

Speaker 8 (29:55):
Hello. Yeah, I was up at my wiler and we're
at the local the school fair, and the dunk machine
was there. Brendan Favala was on the dunk machine and
all the little kiddies were having to go trying to
knock him in. But one kid hit the disc but
the tennis ports didn't hit it hard enough to put
him in and the balls rolled out through the crowd.
I was about twenty meters away on an angle, picked

(30:18):
it up, threw it one in one hundred shot, hit
the disk. He went in the crowd erupts and he
come out and he's like, oh, you didn't pay, And
I went up and put ten bucks in.

Speaker 1 (30:32):
A great story. I love the way if you called
the game as well as like a cricket commentary.

Speaker 8 (30:37):
It was the best ten bucks I've ever spent.

Speaker 1 (30:43):
A dream shot as well. Well done, Brad, Brad, thank
you very much for story mate, very funny. Have a
good day you two. Brook. Good morning, Brook, Good morning. Okay,
so what's your piffing story for us this morning?

Speaker 9 (30:55):
It was just this Saturday, just going on the weekend.
I was taking my son into soccer training and he
was eating a nectarine. I just made a freshly brewed
cup of tea and my team is huge and it's
sitting in the middle console. Jack eating his nectarine, put it,
left half of it and said here, what should I
do with this? And I said, just throw it out
the window. So he went round down the window the

(31:16):
whole way, gifted as hard as he could, and I
hit the inside of the car just above the window frame,
rebound into my cup of tea.

Speaker 5 (31:29):
I think it's a lesson for you both.

Speaker 1 (31:31):
Yeah, the amount of discarded nectarines you see after Saturday
morning sport around where I lived, where it's other parents
just CA's just check out on the streets here.

Speaker 8 (31:43):
Ver nice.

Speaker 1 (31:44):
It's just a wash of them around some near ovals
and public spaces and that discarded nectaries. Yeah, all right, listen, Brook,
thank you very much the story. Let's go to soone. Now,
good morning, Sue.

Speaker 10 (31:58):
Why how are you?

Speaker 1 (32:00):
We're good too? Who did who piff? Two?

Speaker 10 (32:04):
I piffed a raw sausage over two backyards onto someone's
garage roof. And when I went around to sort of
say sorry, they laughed about it. And we've been best
friends for over thirty years.

Speaker 1 (32:17):
Now, what great story. Maybe tomorrow we do How did
you meet your friend? What do you actually say? So, hey, sorry,
there's a my sausage is on your roof.

Speaker 10 (32:28):
There was a carpoard actually, and they were having this
family do in the carport and they heard the sausage
and we kind of went around rather embarrassed and said, yeah, sorry,
that was me. But we all laughed and yeah.

Speaker 9 (32:41):
She's my best friend.

Speaker 5 (32:43):
Why did you throw it?

Speaker 10 (32:45):
I had another person with me and she dared me
to do It's christians Apple.

Speaker 1 (32:52):
Yeah, there's no explanation that's actually possible. Why you did it?

Speaker 10 (32:59):
But luckily it's got over, so over two backyards were
the wits of two backyards onto the garage, onto the
roof path.

Speaker 5 (33:06):
That so pretty good throw impressive.

Speaker 1 (33:08):
Do you know maybe we need to see how far
could someone actually piff a sausage. I'm not leaving this idea.

Speaker 7 (33:16):
This is true.

Speaker 1 (33:18):
Snags in the Air.

Speaker 2 (33:19):
The Christian Connell Show podcast.

Speaker 1 (33:22):
So big weekend in my house and our eighteen year
old daughter, our youngest daughter, Lois, last one to move
out yesterday after college, and the highlight of my weekend
actually was Saturday afternoon. I said I'd like to cook
you a special kind of going away dinner, and then
she said, look, I'd love to do that with you.
So we cooked together, we went like listening to music.
It was really really nice. However, what was also really

(33:44):
nice is as we're going to get the ingredients just
to have one last big row about something dumb together
and she was driving and she starts telling me about
how dogs can perform CPR and you know, most of
the time has it done. I'm very laid back. I
don't take the bites. I just sort of go okay.

(34:05):
I don't want to sort of man's baby this one.
I've got to be honest. I was just like, right,
there's just no way. But we got into as you're aboutually,
I start recording because I thought she's gonna be going
on about this for a couple of minutes. She's not
going to back down about she's seen something on TikTok
about a dog doing CPR on a human.

Speaker 3 (34:25):
People, dogs can do this.

Speaker 1 (34:26):
She also started to refer to me as people. Recently,
we've moved on from do now to just a generic people.
It's just me people.

Speaker 2 (34:33):
Dogs can do this.

Speaker 7 (34:34):
It would not get enough power into the chest to
do CPR.

Speaker 1 (34:37):
Why why you didn't give me this a serious response
about power through the chest.

Speaker 7 (34:42):
People, dogs can do this. It would not get enough
power into the chest to do CPR. Dogs. There's no
way I agree that dog.

Speaker 11 (34:49):
Could not save someone's life with CPR.

Speaker 12 (34:52):
However, if you collapse and the ambulance is because you've
got something on your wrist that'said pulling the ambulance, and
your dog stops jumping up and down on you just
because it's worrying, Oh my god, oh my god.

Speaker 5 (35:03):
You guys like that, Oh.

Speaker 1 (35:04):
By you think that well, I hope they're gonna get
a university. They can teach you about the sort of
stuff can't do CPR. The kids smart enough to get
into university, and I'm gonna do criminology. And then she
seen someone on TikTok. She showed me the video when
we got to this to the supermarket, and it was
someone explaining how this is gonna work, and the person
who's and the person the trainer says, this person who's

(35:27):
going to be the stooge. You pretend to collapse right now,
and the dog, if you see, and then she goes
right the way, You'll need to be holding some ham
So the only way you're getting revived the dogs just
jumping and go and gimme release that hand.

Speaker 5 (35:43):
If you're going down, grab some polcats on the way.

Speaker 1 (35:46):
So if you're within crawling distance when you have your
he attack of a deli, this is great. But anyway
she's she's now found an article.

Speaker 11 (35:54):
I named Leo, I'm learn how to perform CPR for
his owner, Emily Anderson. Anderson, who works as an e
R nurse and a dog talk the perfectly trained pup
to jump up and down on American's chest and listen
to breathing every day.

Speaker 7 (36:08):
He totally amazes me.

Speaker 1 (36:09):
A dog can't do CPRT to stick into my gun.
There's nothing more to say as a parent. The amount
of things you'll be stunned at you never thought you'd
ever have to seriously say in your life. That is
another new one, right on the cusp of her moving out.
I can't believe much she's saying to my eighteen year
old daughter. A dog can't perform CPR. So I just

(36:31):
want to double check, though, because I'd hate to be wrong.
I'm happy to go and see it today. Go hey,
I know you've only me that house. I'm just gonna say, sorry,
turns out dogs, But in my mind, there's simply no
way they would have enough power to do the chess compressions. Sure,
but she was adamant she's seen something on TikTok and
that's where they get the truth from. So I don't
know if we've got any trained first daiders or there's

(36:54):
any any sort of paramedics listening right now that can
please just back me up. Surely a dog cannot fuck
but I'm saying this, a dog can perform CPR.

Speaker 2 (37:04):
Christian O'Connell show podcast.

Speaker 1 (37:07):
Over the weekend, Masha get into a argument with my
eighteen year old daughter, which is a shame on the
eve of her moving out. Yesterday. She was trying to
tell me with a dog and that a dog can
do CPR, and I was having none of it.

Speaker 11 (37:21):
People don't can do this.

Speaker 7 (37:23):
It would not be to get enough power into the
chest to do CPR. Dog. There's no way I agree that.

Speaker 11 (37:28):
Dog save someone's life with CPR.

Speaker 12 (37:31):
However, if you collapse and the ambulance is because you've
got something on your wrist, that said pulling the ambulance
and your dog stops jumping up and down on you
just because.

Speaker 3 (37:41):
It's worrying, Oh my god, Oh my god.

Speaker 1 (37:43):
You guys like that, Oh boy, you think Well, hopefully
were gonna get a university they can teach you about
this sort of stuff. Dogs can't do CPR. Someone has
sent me a video Christianity is saying, is it Tony
christian I was skept school listener this this morning. I
agree with you, And then I google it and there's
a BBC video here, and it's a video of a stocky,

(38:04):
powerful little dog running in a IR dummy lying on
the ground. It jumps on his belly twice and then
just has to lie down next to It's not CPR.

Speaker 5 (38:14):
It's not getting enough push.

Speaker 1 (38:17):
Those front legs. Guys, Christian and the Morning think about this.
It would depend on the size of the dog. My
dog is sixty two kilos and it hurts me. He
just steps on my toes. If he jumped on me,
I'm sure he could bring me back for the dead.
How about Patsy's dog, it's massive. Larry, your cat's pretty chunky,
that cat. If I'm going he's just putting a pillow

(38:37):
over my face and go oh and all you can
eat buffet. Lying on the floor at Larry level, he's
not doing anything. Wayne, Good morning, Good morning.

Speaker 7 (38:48):
Hell are we Yeah?

Speaker 1 (38:49):
We're good? So Wayne understanding used to be a first responder.

Speaker 13 (38:53):
Yeah, correct, emergency response responder, first responder so unfortunately to
CBR and a lot of people over my time. Good
and bad. So with babies, you use two fingers on
the chest. So as long as there's a regular feat
to the heart until ambulances arrived. It can be done

(39:17):
to a human or middle aged person, not a very
thick set person. As long as there is pressure put
on to the chess cabinat in a regular pattern. It
is possible.

Speaker 1 (39:31):
You have got to be kidding me. This is gonna hurt.

Speaker 13 (39:34):
So I guarantee you. I guarantee you. You are a
policy to your door. And the worst thing is my
kids are embarrassed, and solicitors and ones in the Department
of Justice also right, And it is possible. I have
these conversations with my kids and it springs me out.

(39:58):
It's not the only dad who it's probably.

Speaker 1 (40:02):
So you're saying that a dog could.

Speaker 5 (40:08):
Baby.

Speaker 4 (40:08):
You're a weak person, and how often is your baby
going to be in trouble that you go, hey, let
the dog take.

Speaker 1 (40:18):
Hopefully there'd be someone real close to that baby rather
than a dog babysitter.

Speaker 2 (40:25):
The Christian O'Connell show podcast.

Speaker 1 (40:28):
Christian, Hang on a minute here, dogs and CPR. CPR
stands for cardio cardio pulmonary resuscitation. So everyone forgetting the
pee bit. It's not just a chest compressions that the
dog would have to do. You're breathing for the casual
tea as well. Tell me how a dog gets his
mouth over the casualty's mouth and forms a good seal
and gets air into them. I reckon. Most dogs will

(40:50):
be physically incapable, even if you could train them to
do it. Also, dog breath might bring you back to life. Anyway,
there's some Simon Colin, who is a registered paramedic instructor. Christian,
do not listen to the previous caller. Don't worry. We weren't.
It is not in the public interest or patient's interest
to allow dogs to do CPR. They cannot do effective CPR.

(41:11):
If you just tuned in. My daughter was trying to
tell me the weekend that she saw something on TikTok.
We got into a serious argument. She said that dogs
can do CPR, collins are paramouts that they cannot do
effective CPR. It's as simple as that. Three things in
need a depth of compression, rays of compression, full recoil
off the chef to after compression. Without these, it does
not work. A dog cannot give you rescue breathing Colin,

(41:35):
I'm taking that to my daughter. I'm sending you, mister.

Speaker 2 (41:37):
John Christian o'connells show go on podcast.

Speaker 3 (41:42):
It's just another mishard Monday.

Speaker 1 (41:45):
Christian O'Connell's miss hurd lyrics. Every Monday on a show
we go through your miss her lyrics as we play
them back. If we agree what you think you're mishearing,
you'll hear this. If you playing the mac and we
don't agree, are the really great ones come on in
this Hall of fame? Last week there were two Hall
of Famous. Grant got one for Van Hayden's Little Guitars

(42:08):
Etcher Sketch Etcher, Sketch canch and young correspondent Jack Post
got one for Phil Collins. Don't lose my number, Oh
Billy Jupiter Jupiter. All right, we got some Brandie wants here.
First of all, Darren's got this song Hammerhead by James Rain.

(42:30):
Original line be my purifier, you really or is James
Rain saying be my urine? Fire? You really fire? He's
he's really leaning into it as well, you really fire? Christian.

(42:55):
It's comes from Ryan Monroe. Christian. I hear the ex
U n General Secretary's name in this song of the
Strokes Barely Legal. Original line by the Strokes is together
again like the beginning, Paul, can you hear it? Kofe
and Ann former UN Secretary General together again like Kofee
and Nan. Yes, yes, great recoil to know the great

(43:23):
Man Kofee and Nann haven't heard that name in years?
When was he running the un It's quite a year
two thousands, isn't it. Kofee and Nann. The joy when
you misheard that must have been huge, Ryan, Hall of Fame,
great work, Thank you very much, Ryan. Matt cook Sener
almost fire by John Park original line, I can hear

(43:46):
the music playing, I can see the banners fly. Or
is John Pass saying I can hear the music playing,
I can see the pandas fly, Yes, that is there

(44:08):
a Matt Chris has got Madonna el Bonita. Last night
I dreamt of San Pedron Agenda se or was Mydonna
dreaming of some nice calms? Last night? I dreamt of
some bagels. Yes, night Adgenda some definitely Yeah, that's their

(44:28):
well done, that's night Adgenda Sante Chris, well done. And
finally got this one from Jordan Empire. State of mind,
Alicia Key seeing my face in lights or my name
or marquis found down on Broadway?

Speaker 14 (44:45):
My face night, it's on my name. A monkey's found
down on Broadway.

Speaker 1 (44:54):
It's in there. You hear monkeys in there? I did
see my face? Or is it seeing my face? In
lights on my name or monkeys down and Broadway.

Speaker 14 (45:02):
Sema fin, it's on my name, A monkey's found.

Speaker 1 (45:09):
It's there, see my facing lights and my name or
monkeys either's good.

Speaker 14 (45:15):
Sea face, it's on my name, A monkey's found down
on wrong?

Speaker 1 (45:19):
Where have we never heard before? Suddeny, it's crystal clear?
The clowns are parted? Thank you Jordan, well done. But
the best one today is bringing about the name of
the great Kofe and nad. Thank you very much everyone
for us sending me you miss her lyrics every day.
You email me whenever you miss here one Christian at

(45:41):
Christian O'Connell dot com.

Speaker 2 (45:42):
Today Christian O'Connell show, go on podcast.

Speaker 1 (45:46):
I need you have this week. I need your help
them finding some better language. I will not identify. Although
my wife and I do find ourself in a situation
after dropping off our eighteen year old daughter at college yesterday,
last one to leave home. We are technically empty nesters.
But I don't like that phrase. It's miserable, it's bleak,
it's reductive, it's anti joy, and so I'm looking for

(46:10):
better phrase and alternative to being empty nesters. What is
this period? Now? What is it? Patsy, what do you
think I.

Speaker 6 (46:18):
Reckon it's time for your second honeymoon. I reckon your
second honeymoon. It's because you've got this new found freedom.
And let's face it, you could walk around the house
nude at lunchtime and no one would care because.

Speaker 1 (46:30):
As she my wife would, she'd find that objectionable. She's
gonna put some pants on. What are you up to?

Speaker 5 (46:37):
It's lunchtime?

Speaker 1 (46:38):
Much time? You're right, Actually I'm really hungry blood sugars now.

Speaker 6 (46:41):
Actually, this new found freedom you yesterday?

Speaker 1 (46:47):
So we came back about half three, and you know
what we did. We tidied the garage. How is that
a second honeymoon? It's not first tiny moon. Don't go
around tidy. They destroy the garage. We tidy the garage. Why,
because we're avoiding our feelings. Let's put the suitcases away.
There's nothing happening here.

Speaker 5 (47:05):
I agree with Patty. You're gotta embrace the freedom. Yes,
you don't have any responsibilities.

Speaker 1 (47:10):
Oh no, there's always responsibilities. Yesterday evening, the eldest daughter
called hysterical Dad. There's row Serrich coming out the wall
and the toilet. I went, and you call me. I've
probably caused the damage. You call the emergency plumber. I'm
literally not what awful. I was also two things. Call
emergency plumber right now, call the landlord and get out

(47:31):
the house. But for sure, don't call me. Why are
you calling me? Hang up? Hang hang up? All right?
Some of the suggestions from you guys. He's alternatives to
being empty nesters. Freelancers. This is a term when I left.
I love freelances.

Speaker 5 (47:49):
My new favorite.

Speaker 1 (47:50):
Choose your own right, You're right, You're right. I'm a consultant,
dad now, just doing a few hours here. I file
my findings and reports and they go, yeah, well leave
it on my desk either port my I love freelancers.
Thank you very much, Ameritus parents. I don't really, we
don't really. I think this means form or something. It's
two parts from me Johnny with released hostages, Christian. I

(48:16):
do understand that I do feel a bit different today.
Right as much as I'm going to miss her so much,
I do feel a bit like even this morning, I
stood at the front of the house breathing in freedom.
Something different about me.

Speaker 5 (48:30):
You hadn't looking for you today, Like Andy when he's
in the warden's office with.

Speaker 1 (48:36):
Christian We refer to us. Our youngest left last year,
so I know what you're going through. We refer to
ourselves now as grown up parents. It never lasts for long.
They keep coming back or ringing you about raw sewage
coming out the wall. Jimmy four Fridges. I really miss
my two boys, but it's nice to have food in
the fridge that lasts longer than three days, although I
would swap it in a heartbeat. That comes from Jimmy

(48:57):
and Kate POD's parents on demand. Yes, Pods is good
and freelancers. Thank you.

Speaker 2 (49:03):
The Christian O'Connell show podcast.

Speaker 1 (49:06):
Christian, you're now the fallback team. Whenever the kids stumble,
they always know they can count you for support, can they.

Speaker 4 (49:15):
It's still not a very positive mesa fallback team.

Speaker 1 (49:19):
It's a military term, the benchwarmers, incursions owners. Christian is
mail here passes right. Get Nude. I now walk. It's
a new thing we're doing this week. Get news. Christian
is mail here. I now walk around my house nude
all the time, at my two sons and no longer
with us anymore. And I've changed his bedroom into my
dressing room. It's great, Christian. What's an alternative to empty

(49:44):
nesters swingers. No, Tim, well you're already naked. Yes, Instead
of empty nesters, maybe you could call it middle aged rebels.
We sold out the garage yesterday. There's nothing rebellious about it. Christian.
What about freedom father and emancipated my that's when you
divorce relations rim. That's even Chris. You've now given me

(50:07):
a worse phrase now than empty nesters. Hey, christ and
how are the kids? Well, I'm a freedom father and
this is my wife. She's an emancipated mother. They sound
like a cult all right. Time wast today. A lot
of pet talk on the show today. Who knew it's
actually World Pet Day. Here's some results of the six

(50:31):
hundred thousand dollars pet senses. So that's been done. Six
hundred thousand. Dogs are the most expensive animal to own,
with owners spending on average sixteen hundred bucks a year
on our dogs.

Speaker 5 (50:45):
Still pretty cheap. I compare that to a child.

Speaker 3 (50:48):
I love that they return as well.

Speaker 1 (50:50):
Your only comparison is to a child. Well, we just
found dead of the year. A simple dog flat would
do for Gordon to get himself to nursery bowl for
some food and water. The most common dog and cat name.

Speaker 5 (51:07):
I just think it is Ralph Luna.

Speaker 1 (51:13):
Yeah I knew your word. Oh how numb the hipster?
Really yeah, you're not a freedom father. The most common
dog and cat name is Lumina, the most common reptile
name was squirt, and the most common bird name. Come
on Australia, use your imagine, chuck. All right, so today

(51:35):
what are we doing. We're looking for your pet celebrities.
Sometimes his job is odd. You know. We got a
message now you can't because you just have too many questions,
you know, especially I speak here as a freedom father.
When I saw it yesterday was it's like what do
we a grieve for the outwort time wers? And I
saw the message from producer of saying pet celebrities as

(51:57):
if it was of course, that's what you do on
a radio show's just to send your celebrities as pets.
That's it. It's the old radio one O one John Hamster.

Speaker 4 (52:09):
See it's that easy jack Yak gold, come on pet, No,
I'm taking that back.

Speaker 1 (52:15):
No yack owners corn in now, I bet there are
yak owners, very lovely little yak in a cage somewhere.
Douc Norris Gold al Pacaccino gold, Sigourney Beaver, no pet
as a kid, I had a pet beaver, show.

Speaker 5 (52:33):
Us photos my pet beaver.

Speaker 1 (52:36):
Let's leave it, Madam silver cat damon no catam up
and down Sigourney Beaver should have got gold BLUs should
be raining money right now, Jackie Boy, will you got

(52:57):
pet celebrities Ship Susan s.

Speaker 15 (53:01):
Yeah, that's good gold Angelina Colley god as well, Robert
Downboy Junior e s a little bit hacky there and
Vet Middluf Gold plus.

Speaker 1 (53:15):
You have some cash? All right? If you get a
gold plus, you win two hundred dollars in cash thanks
to dream hone Art Union text us in now then
pets celebrities, oh four seventy five three one oh four
three and does anyone have a pet beaver or yak
on nine four one four one four.

Speaker 2 (53:31):
Three Christian O'Connell show go on podcast.

Speaker 1 (53:36):
Time Wasted Today, we're looking for your pet celebrities. Everyone
getting a gold plus? When's two hundred dollars in cash
thanks to dream Home Art Union. Jack you by, you're
ready to mark, Let's do it all right? Pet celebrities
Lady Glah.

Speaker 5 (53:54):
Yeah, but not really a pet silvera.

Speaker 3 (53:57):
Some people have pet glass.

Speaker 1 (53:59):
Absolutely, we had a.

Speaker 3 (54:00):
Pit cocky growing up.

Speaker 5 (54:01):
Yeah, cocky two you can imagine, but not a glass.

Speaker 1 (54:04):
Oh yeah, spaniel day Lewis. That's added a word. Undanny
Powell Joe Cocker Spaniel silver, Barack Olama, yeah, gold plus.
There is a lama, isn't there in North Melbourne called
Barack Olama? Yeah? Yep. Someone called the show a couple

(54:27):
of years ago, five or six years ago about a
lama in Fitzroy would be Hipstersville cooled Barack Olama. I'm
pretty sure they've got one. Rio. Get back to you,
Brad Pittbull silver, Will Ferrett gold, Burmese Theron instead of
Chinese there on Burmese, Jess Reese with a spaniel silver plus,

(54:55):
Tim were done, Jerbilly Idol Gerbilly Idol Gold, Mel Gibbon.

Speaker 5 (55:03):
You have not really a pet silver.

Speaker 1 (55:06):
So when you run a pet shop over there with
a suddenly done ard.

Speaker 2 (55:10):
Really a pet.

Speaker 1 (55:11):
We're asking to do pet celebrities. What's the logic in that?
Lama del rey O gold plus someone's loosened up.

Speaker 5 (55:24):
No, but Lama, you can have a pet.

Speaker 1 (55:28):
Sheila Wolf. They don't bracket here, Sheila Boof. You know,
Transformer fella that actually put it transformer fellow got it gap,
Thank you, Mike Python. You can actually imagine him saying
it like that. Sorry the name Mike Python. Give him
O my god. It's not really a pet though.

Speaker 5 (55:49):
As a pet then you can have a beaver as
a pet, and you can have a y.

Speaker 1 (55:53):
Anything can be a pet. Samuel L. Quackson Silver was
gold plus, John Miawi camp Bronze, Dave Grown silver, Some
Little Dean is eleven is of Sick today from.

Speaker 5 (56:14):
Stilts Silver Plus.

Speaker 1 (56:18):
It's a dark old art today And that was the
last one there. We've actually got a surplus of money
now because you only gave out like two lots of
the today. Oh well, what do we find out about
Barack Olama? Rio?

Speaker 5 (56:31):
No, it's absolutely nothing on Google.

Speaker 1 (56:35):
You know, I remember.

Speaker 5 (56:37):
Ringing Bell. You have to go into the show archives
after this. He was a man who walked his lama
through the streets of fitz That's right.

Speaker 1 (56:44):
Someone will know something about this right now about Alama
in North Melbourne. I think Fitzroy called Barack Olama.

Speaker 2 (56:52):
Christian O'Connell shown podcast.

Speaker 1 (56:55):
Wanting to Kirsty Christian Tower Jack, I have a pet,
Glar Helen Clunes. Our neighbor has a pet goala called Mooney.
They've had him for over fifteen years now. Now on
such as of Barack Olama, I was right. We have
talked about whether or not this is fact talk fiction
about Alama in North Melbourne. Corback Olama and I found
the original email from twenty nineteen first year of the show,

(57:19):
twenty fourth of July twenty nineteen from a guy called
Brian Maguire Christian, I need to sell you to set
on an argument. A few years ago, my best mate
Pole emigrated to Melbourne from Scotland. He's now living in Gelong.
He's back in Scotland for a few week visiting family
and we found ourselves having a few beers. I asked
him about what life in Melburn was like and he
was saying what a diverse and dynamic city is. And

(57:40):
he also said that Australians are mad and that he
claims that whilst walking once in an area called Fitzroy
after work, he was asked to hold the lead to
someone's pet Lama whilst the owner went to get a
coffee in a coffee shop. This was clearly met with
cynicism from US Scots. We don't know what a vegetable
looks like. Levermind someone who takes a lama for a walk.
He swears it's true, not just that that when he

(58:03):
was chatting with the only when it came back with
the coffee, that the lama was called Barack O Lama? Christian,
are there locals walking around Melbourne with lama's on leeds,
parents and shoulders and snakes around the next Is that
what counts for hipster in North Melbourne? I can't remember
what we found out about the legend. I think we
Is it still hanging out? There's a question we need

(58:24):
to know. Yes, all these years later, in twenty twenty five,
we still haven't got any closer to the truth about
Barack oh Lama. If anyone's got anything to say about that,
please email me today Christian at Christian O'Connell dot com.

Speaker 2 (58:37):
The Christian O'Connell Show Podcast