ASK UNCUT: "How can I tell if I'm into him or just into the attention he gives me?"

Every week, Britt & Laura take on your deepest, darkest dilemmas and unpack them (and HOPEFULLY come up with an answer for you). 

Andrea joins the show - she's unsure if she is actually into a guy she knows from uni or if she's just enjoying the attention. Perhaps both?

ENTER YOUR ASK UNCUT HERE: https://www.kiis1065.com.au/competition/the-pick-up-ask-uncut/ 

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:10):
I heard podcasts, Heem More Kiss podcast playlist and listen
live on the free iHeart app.

Speaker 2 (00:17):
Hey, it's Thursday, which means it is Ask Uncut, where
you guys write in and call up with your biggest
problems and us is very untrained, unqualified radio host.

Speaker 3 (00:26):
We do our best to answer it.

Speaker 2 (00:27):
We do this every week on our podcast Life on
Cut podcast. It's a fan favorite and we absolutely love it.

Speaker 3 (00:33):
And today we have.

Speaker 2 (00:34):
Andrea on the phone, who has a bit of a
predicament around I guess young love Andrew.

Speaker 4 (00:40):
Is that the case, Yeah, that's the case.

Speaker 5 (00:43):
What's going on?

Speaker 4 (00:44):
So I'm here at UNI and I've kind of developed
a crush on this guy. I don't really know if
I have or I just like that he's kind of
interested in me.

Speaker 5 (00:55):
What's he done to make you think that he's interested
in you?

Speaker 4 (00:57):
Firstly, well, he has a very like flittatious personality and
very charismatic, and I don't know if I'm kind of
like picking up that it's you know es, or if
he's just really charming.

Speaker 5 (01:11):
I also think it's kind of like fifty to fifty.

Speaker 1 (01:13):
Sometimes I would never have even thought about someone as
a potential partner and then they started showing interest in me,
and I was like, oh, maybe I like you, but
actually maybe I.

Speaker 5 (01:23):
Just like the attention. I can't tell.

Speaker 3 (01:25):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:26):
I think that you're overthinking this. I think this is
actually quite easy.

Speaker 3 (01:29):
You want to know. How do I know if I
actually like.

Speaker 5 (01:31):
Him or not to go on a date.

Speaker 2 (01:33):
I just sometimes wonder if we overthink things. Unless you're
a pulsed by him and he's giving you the ick,
if you think you could like him and you're confused,
it means there's a chance that you really do like him.
You'll figure out pretty quickly if it's real or not,
or if it's the attention. We all like a bit
of attention.

Speaker 3 (01:47):
Let's be real. It's human nature.

Speaker 2 (01:49):
But I wouldn't overthink it. I think if you're enjoying
the flirting, you're questioning if it's real or not. Go
on a date and find out what you think.

Speaker 5 (01:56):
At the end of the day.

Speaker 4 (01:58):
Yeah, there is just one problem as well. My friend
was interested in him first and he rejected her, and
only after that did I actually start to kind of
like him.

Speaker 3 (02:09):
That actually is a whole another layer.

Speaker 5 (02:11):
It does complicate things.

Speaker 1 (02:12):
However, However, if your friend And this is probably a
question for you too, Britt. If your friend has never
hooked up with them, if nothing's ever happened, just because
they had interest in someone doesn't mean that they can
then No.

Speaker 3 (02:24):
It's pretty shit, yeah, isn't Yeah?

Speaker 5 (02:26):
But for how long? Like what's the time limit? There's
got to be a time limit.

Speaker 1 (02:29):
You can't just like bags a guy for forever if
he doesn't like you, never has.

Speaker 2 (02:34):
I think that in that situation, that's definitely you know,
this has a bit like an onion. You know, you
have to peel it back. You need to ask your friend.
I would think if she's a really good friend, if
it's an acquaintance at union you like, sit in the
same lab class, don't worry. But if it's a really
good friend of yours, you will damage the friendship if
you go and try and dating without saying anything. I
think you need to ask and say, Hey, would you

(02:55):
care if I asked him out?

Speaker 5 (02:57):
Is that too weird?

Speaker 2 (02:58):
Like I think I've got a crush on him, And
if it is a problem for her, I wouldn't be
touching it with a ten foot pole, like there are
pallennium men out.

Speaker 1 (03:04):
There, trust me, Andrea, how close a friends are you?

Speaker 4 (03:07):
Oh, we met this year, but we really joined up
because we both moved to UNI, so we're both kind
of doing this on our own. So we formed a
really good bond and by.

Speaker 5 (03:18):
Good for each other there. Yeah, and how well do
you know this guy? Like when you say he's flirty,
Like what's he doing? Like how flirty is flirty?

Speaker 4 (03:26):
Well, he has this like the way that he speaks
and like he holds such great eye compact.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
Oh, he's he's sending the signal anything more than three
seconds is like is a proper signal.

Speaker 1 (03:37):
But also he might I mean, would you ever ask
him out? Or are you waiting to see if he
makes a move?

Speaker 2 (03:43):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (03:44):
I think I could do the risk and ask him out.

Speaker 2 (03:48):
I honestly don't do it, Like I'm I want to
say we love love. You don't even know if you
like him. It's not like you're like this is my guy, Like, yeah,
I like him, and I don't want to dog my friend.
You're confused by it. I wouldn't be risking a friendship.
If you think it's really really real and there's something there,
talk to your friend first, but there will trust me, Like,
friendship are so much more important than a hookup or

(04:11):
a crush that you're not even convinced you have.

Speaker 1 (04:14):
Yeah, I back Britt on this one. I reckon at
least speak to your friend about it. But in saying that,
sometimes people can get very territorial over someone that they've
never had anything with, and I also think that that's
a bit weird because they don't think that you can
like be like I liked him for a month and
he didn't like me. Nothing ever happened, and therefore no
one else candained our laws.

Speaker 2 (04:34):
Think about it, imagine if let's do it like you
and me. Imagine you asked a guy out that you
really liked and he said no, and then I was like, cool,
I'll do it and he said yes. You'd be like, okay, cool, Britt,
that's pretty shit.

Speaker 5 (04:44):
Like you were the same tinderdates with God.

Speaker 3 (04:46):
But we didn't know that was years apart. We didn't
even know each other.

Speaker 2 (04:49):
So it's like, if that happened, you'd be devoted as
a friend. You'd be like, man, there's so many people
out there, like you knew I liked him, And how
would she feel knowing she wasn't good enough and she
was rejected?

Speaker 5 (05:00):
But you were.

Speaker 1 (05:01):
I do think that there's a time limit to it, though,
Like I don't think that it means gies him to
a fifty that's I mean, I don't think that it
means like if you still feel like this in six month,
three years time, like you know, I don't think that
that counts for like indefinitely in perpetuity, that no one's
ever allowed to like hook.

Speaker 5 (05:16):
Up with it. Anyway.

Speaker 3 (05:17):
Laura's saying, put a time limit on it. I'm saying,
don't do it, but.

Speaker 5 (05:22):
You know what you have to do, Andreas, give us
a call back and let's know how it all goes.

Speaker 2 (05:26):
Well.

Speaker 1 (05:26):
Do thank you guys so much, thanks honey, thank you.

Speaker 3 (05:29):
She's like, you guys win no help. She's like, what
was that