Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
I Heart Podcasts, Heem More Kiss podcast playlist and listen
live on the free iHeart app.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
Well, it is Thursday, and you know what that means.
Dunt Dunton is ask Uncut.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
This is what we do on our podcast Live Uncut
Podcasts every single week. One of my favorite things that
we do. You guys writing or call up with your
questions or the biggest problem of the week. We do
our best to answer them. Today we have Aaron who
is in a bit of a pickle with a relationship
she's witnessing at work.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Erin what's the deats?
Speaker 4 (00:41):
So pretty much my boss I found out that he
was cheating on his wife. But I actually know the
wife and I don't know how to tell her.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
How did you find out that he's cheating? Is it
someone at work or is it something that you like?
How do you find that out?
Speaker 4 (00:56):
Yeah, so I found out through a couple of colleagues.
He's pretty flirty with everyone at work, to be honest,
I just heard through a couple of people, and I'm
the only when that's close to the wife. So I
feel like I need to tell her.
Speaker 3 (01:09):
This is where you run a risk because it's well,
it sounds like you're also not one hundred percent. It
sounds like like it's through the grape vines, like you've
seen it yourself. But like such and such as said
that they think or I mean, I could be wrong,
but the fact that your boss firstly is a huge thing.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
There's a power and balance there. I'm sure you don't
want to get involved in it.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
But secondly, I think unless you are one hundred percent sure,
I don't.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Think you can bring it up.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
Well do you think are you one hundred percent sure?
Speaker 4 (01:36):
Well, I've seen the Tinder profile, so I know you
know there's some bit of evidence there.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
But yeah, yeah, Well I think you can say that
for sure. I think you don't have to say, hey,
he's cheating. I think you can just say, hey, I
feel really uncomfortable doing this. But I you should know
this could be fake, could be a catfish. But I
have seen Brett on Tinder.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
You're gonna call your boss's wife and say, hey.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
My friend she knows her. Well, it's still it's still
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Okay, Well, firstly, I guess like, in terms of the
workplace that you work at, is this a job that
you you like?
Speaker 2 (02:09):
Would be devastated to lose or are you now in a.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Situation where you're like, do you know what, I could
leave this job and get something else that's of equal
you know, value and everything else.
Speaker 4 (02:19):
I mean, I love my job. I don't want to
lose it, that's the thing, you know. And like I'm
also love my boss and I don't want to cause
any drama. And if he found out, I definitely lose
my job.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
How close are you to his wife?
Speaker 4 (02:31):
I'd say we're pretty close. Like we've gone out to
launch a couple of times together.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
Maybe just put your hand in the sand. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
It's like and I know that this is so polarizing
and like cheating is Honestly, anytime we answer any questions,
are i'd cheating? It's like the one thing that gets
people absolutely rage baited. I worry that you're putting yourself
in the firing line of something that's going to blow
up for you in your workplace when you've not done
anything wrong.
Speaker 3 (02:57):
It's different if you find out like that it's a
friend's husband, that's one thing. But when your friend's husband
is also in charge of your livelihood and your.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Career, that's such a big responsibility. I think it gets
too messy.
Speaker 3 (03:09):
The only thing you could somehow anonymously do maybe print
it out and leave it on a desk or something.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
Don't say who is wrong so you can't get traced
back to you. But if you feel like.
Speaker 3 (03:17):
You really need if you're close enough to her and
you're and you think she really needs to know, you
just have to weigh up where it comes from, because
if it does fall back onto you at the end
of the day, like, is that situation worth losing your
job over?
Speaker 1 (03:29):
Would you, brit if this was you, would you ever
speak to your boss about it directly rather than.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Going to the wife first, your friends.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
Once your boss knows there's just you can't move on
from that.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
You never forget it.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
There will always been in balance, and your head will
be on there Chapah.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
But he also probably should know that everyone knows. If
everyone's talking about it.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
Why should we protect him? He should know the everyone
no stuff that I don't know.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Honestly, I actually don't feel like we've beat Eddie help
at all, because I think if I was in this situation,
I don't think I would get involved, and I don't
I know that that is not how everyone would respond
to this, but I just worry about the drama it
brings into your life.
Speaker 4 (04:03):
If this was me, I would want to know.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
So I think in that case, then she needs to
know what you know without knowing it's you that know that.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
How are you going to do that? How would you?
Speaker 3 (04:13):
As I said, print it out the Tinder profile, put
it on a desk, make it anonymous, bring it to attention,
Write an anonymous note.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
Hey, I don't want to get involved, but I have
seen your part of your husband on Tinder.
Speaker 3 (04:23):
I don't want to get involved for my own personal reasons,
but I think it's important you know, do with it
what you will. I'm not saying that's the right way
to go about it, but there are definitely ways to
let somebody know without getting involved. The only thing I've
always said in relation to these, if you're going to
be that person that anonymously brings to attention that someone's
partner is cheating, it can't just be a statement I've
seen your partner cheating.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
There has to be evidence attached to it.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
Otherwise you send them into a bit of a spiral
on like not knowing is it real?
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Is it fake? It makes it worse if you're going
to go down that track.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
You have to give her enough evidence or reason to
believe that whoever you are, the vigilante that you are,
actually has some basis to it.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
Aaron, I don't know. I mean, this is an impossibly
hard thing for you to navigate. My worry is that
there's no after care with that. You just drop a
bomb on someone's life and then you don't don't have
to deal with any of the emotional flow on from it.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Yeah, but it's not a choice because of that. The
choice is because she doesn't want to lose a job.
She's in a tricky between a rock and a hard place.
It's probably the worst place to be. But I don't know.
Let us know what you do, though.
Speaker 4 (05:21):
I will. I definitely will. I'm thinking to leave a
letter on her car, maybe.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
Or not the car. Not the car, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (05:29):
The letter.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
Go seek to a therapist.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
We're not qualified, don't I know. My advice was brilliant.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
Take mine.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
Let me know how you go.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Thanks, Eron. Definitely give us call back and let us
know how it goes.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
I will.
Speaker 4 (05:41):
Thanks, guys,