FULL SHOW: Laura squirted breast milk on a stranger

ASK UNCUT: What to do when your husband's best friend is cheating, would you be mad if you got cash for Christmas from your significant other? and Laura accidentally squirted breast milk on a stranger.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
A good Pickup with Britt Hockley and Laura Burn Radio.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
What our windows, My world is in the dust, only
good fat bugle round.

Speaker 3 (00:13):
I've done much but yeah our.

Speaker 4 (00:16):
Big and what what? It don't matter where.

Speaker 3 (00:20):
This is the pickup.

Speaker 1 (00:21):
Happy Thursday everyone, you're listening to the pick Up with
Britt Hockley and Laura Burn and today we just want
to say god speed.

Speaker 5 (00:29):
To everybody that is on the hunt for those Christy presents.

Speaker 3 (00:32):
Well do you know why?

Speaker 1 (00:33):
Because I left things a little bit too late this
year and a lot of stuff is not arriving according
to Australia posts.

Speaker 5 (00:39):
Well, you also have some pretty particular things you've been
on the hunt for.

Speaker 1 (00:43):
Yeah, my kids have got very specific requests and I've
left it very late.

Speaker 4 (00:47):
So eclectic unusual?

Speaker 3 (00:50):
Not unusual? Is it?

Speaker 1 (00:52):
Lola wants a light up drink bottle that has sparkles
inside it.

Speaker 4 (00:56):
Sorry you don't think she wants eclectic.

Speaker 1 (00:59):
Yeah, she wants like a no globe that lights up.
But it's also a drink bottle. It's very very hard
to find and I did find one and now it's
sold out and I'm probably gonna have to drive across
the country try and try and get.

Speaker 3 (01:07):
It to be fair.

Speaker 5 (01:08):
We did send that to you a couple of weeks ago.
We found it for you. I know, I know you
sat on it and I left it.

Speaker 3 (01:14):
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (01:14):
I feel like maybe this year, because of Black Friday sales,
everything's kind of I do think that it was way
more chaotic and stuff is just taking so long to arrive.
I'm still still waiting on some Black Friday purchases myself.

Speaker 5 (01:25):
I also ordered some magnetic eyelashes to take overseas with me,
and they're arriving the day that I leave, so I
do have to be eyelashless in Europe.

Speaker 3 (01:36):
What are you going to do without your magnetic eye?

Speaker 4 (01:38):
I got sucked into an ad.

Speaker 5 (01:40):
I've got sucked in, you know when they just pop
up and I was like, that looks brilliant, audited it
probably will never use it and never see it again.
No out.

Speaker 1 (01:46):
At this stage, I think Facebook marketing has a lot
to answer for because I reckon every single impulse purchase
I have made in the last twelve months has been
off the back of an ad.

Speaker 5 (01:55):
No mine's Instagram marketing. This is why your kids aren't
on it.

Speaker 1 (01:58):
Sorry, Facebook Marketing. Instagram marketing they're the same thing. Thatta
they own it all.

Speaker 5 (02:04):
Hey, it is Thursday, which means every single week. On
our podcast Life Uncut, we do ask Uncut where we're
just like, I don't know. We're therapists to people that
are going through something really hard.

Speaker 3 (02:13):
I mean, very unqualified therapists. Unlike real therapists. We'll just
give you advice.

Speaker 4 (02:18):
Well, look irrelevant, We're here to help.

Speaker 3 (02:20):
Today.

Speaker 5 (02:20):
We have an Emma on the line, and Emma is
going through a bit of a predicament on cheating in
her friend's circle. And like, if you find out some
information that someone you know is doing the dirty, do
you tell them?

Speaker 4 (02:30):
So Hi, Emma, welcome to the show.

Speaker 5 (02:32):
Hi Emma, lady hey day, set this up for us.

Speaker 4 (02:36):
What's going on?

Speaker 2 (02:37):
Okay? So it's my husband's best friend and I know
for certain that he is messaging his ex girlfriend from
ten years ago saying that she was the one that
got away, his mom still talks about her, blah blah blah,
And do I tell he's now partner that he's been

(02:58):
with for probably two years now and has a kid with.

Speaker 3 (03:01):
How did you find out?

Speaker 2 (03:04):
She told me the ex girlfriend and told me and
sent me screenshots.

Speaker 4 (03:09):
So that's not fair though.

Speaker 3 (03:11):
So you've read them, is it okay?

Speaker 2 (03:13):
Read them?

Speaker 3 (03:14):
In terms of level of inappropriateness?

Speaker 5 (03:16):
How far do you think he's crossed the line saying
you're the one.

Speaker 1 (03:19):
That got away?

Speaker 3 (03:21):
It's pretty bad.

Speaker 2 (03:21):
And do you know what? It went even further, Like
even the day after she told me, he had messaged
her again and she was like, oh my god, another
one just came through and like sent me the screenshot
of that too, like any chance to get He's trying
to stoke up the conversation again. So, Emma, you're still
also has a partner in kids?

Speaker 4 (03:38):
Oh my god, what a journey was she riding back?

Speaker 2 (03:41):
Yeah? But she was like pretty cold, like pretty uninterested.

Speaker 3 (03:44):
Yeah. So Emma, you're still friends with her then? Obviously,
so she's sending you all the evidence. Now you're stuck
in the middle. What do you do with this information?

Speaker 2 (03:51):
Do you know what? I'm not really that good of
friends with her anymore, Like we haven't spoken in years
and years and years, but she just felt the need
that she had to tell somebody and like, I guess,
get it off her chest.

Speaker 5 (04:00):
Do you think that his current partner has any inkling
that there is something like this, you think they're like
happy and wholesome and great.

Speaker 2 (04:09):
I don't know, because I think it's like a very
protected relationship, like no one really knows what goes on.

Speaker 3 (04:15):
Have you told your husband?

Speaker 5 (04:16):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (04:16):
I couldn't wait to tell him.

Speaker 3 (04:20):
Emma, what did he say? What was his response to this?

Speaker 2 (04:23):
He was laughing and he was like, not in a
vindictive way, just like shaking his heads, like he's like, mate,
this guy is never going to change, Like how is
he still up to the same old tricks all these
years later?

Speaker 5 (04:35):
Okay, here's a question. Then how close are you? Like
how good a friends are you with her? Like the
new close zero? So it's not like you feel like she's.

Speaker 3 (04:44):
Do you know what?

Speaker 5 (04:45):
It's so hard and I just I don't even really
know what advice to give you, because if it was
me and my partner was cheating and messaging an X,
I would want someone to tell me. But having said that,
I don't know, you don't know she wants you to
blow up her life, like I've got a little kid.
I'm guessing a one year old because they've only been
together two years. Oh, I know, it's like what do
you do with that? You want to do the right
thing and say, hey, just so you know he's doing

(05:07):
the dirty But you also don't want to be the
one responsible for absolutely imploding their life. And especially when
you're not that close with her, it's sort of like
makes it a really awkward thing. If you are really
good friends with her own best friends with her, I
would be saying absolutely I would have told her.

Speaker 2 (05:21):
Yeah, I wouldn't have hesitated to tell her, But do
I want to be the reason that they've got where
if they stay together afterwards, and then I'm always kind
of like the working in the room.

Speaker 1 (05:31):
I mean, the thing is, you're not the reason, regardless
of what you decide to do. I think it's very
important to know, like you're not the reason. It's his
behavior that will be the reason. So if you decide
that you do want to tell her, would you ever
speak to him about it? Would you ever send the
messages to him and say, hey, you know, just so
you know, we all now know that this is what's

(05:52):
going on, or do you want to not kind of
involve him at all?

Speaker 2 (05:56):
I almost did. I spoke to him on the weekend.
It was a word on the two my tongue and
I thought, oh, I don't even want to bring it
up with him because I don't want him to bite
my head off and then tell me to be quiet
about it or.

Speaker 5 (06:08):
Am I almost think that you could, like if your
husband is that good friends with him, that they're best
friends and he's like, oh ha haa is never going
to change, like he knows his history.

Speaker 4 (06:17):
Maybe your husband, maybe you can ask your husband to
say something.

Speaker 2 (06:19):
Do you know what? I did say that to him.
I was like, are you going to bring it up
with him that you know? And he was like, oh,
He's like, it's pretty funny that he's still the same
way that he always has been. And he's like, if
we do that, if we tell him that we know,
then we're just going to stop finding out about it.
He likes the ducing and tell what's going on because
he also doesn't really know the new misses that well,

(06:40):
so he doesn't really have that care factor there.

Speaker 3 (06:42):
He just sounds like an absolute flog of a person.

Speaker 6 (06:45):
I mean absolutely is yeads and it's so like the
I think the worst part about this is like you know,
you know that your husband's best friend is just an
absolute flog, Like it's hard to respect them.

Speaker 1 (06:55):
It's hard to hang out with them and feel like you,
you know, you want to even talk to them or
have anything common with them.

Speaker 4 (07:00):
I think I've got it, guys, I think I've got it. No,
it's gonna be like blackmail.

Speaker 5 (07:05):
So what you're gonna do is go I think you
go to him the Cheetah, and you say, hey, look,
I know what you've been doing. I feel uncomfortable about it.
I don't need to talk to you about it. I
don't want to hear about it. I just want you
to know that I know it wasn't by choice. You
need to talk to your partner about it, or I'm
going to And that way, he's gonna have to bring
it up with her because he knows that you're going
to do it. But then you don't have to be

(07:25):
the one that does it.

Speaker 3 (07:26):
I disagree, Just go to her. That's so much more conflict.
Oh my god, he's gonna he's gonna blow.

Speaker 1 (07:31):
He will flip his lid at that because he got
caught out.

Speaker 2 (07:34):
Yeah, and he'll also change because you like you're like
a little bit less removed.

Speaker 5 (07:38):
Yes, because you're absolutely you're not doing it. It's a
that's unonymous, that's it. That's enough from us. Hey, Christmas
is a wild time, isn't it for like gifts, gifts
and gift giving and like who gets what?

Speaker 3 (07:52):
And Chris Kringles my fagareite Santas And to.

Speaker 1 (07:55):
Be honest, I'm actually done with present giving. Like I
don't know that that makes me sound like Scrooge. But
unless you're a child, I don't reckon we need to
do presents anymore, or do like bad Santa where you
can steal presents. But the fact we have maybe ten
people coming to Christmas this year.

Speaker 3 (08:09):
No, Chris Kringle, you only need a Chris Secret Sand.

Speaker 4 (08:12):
Now that's it.

Speaker 2 (08:12):
I know.

Speaker 1 (08:12):
But there's always that annoying person who's gone and bought
Sorry it's my mum. I love her to death, but
they've gone and bought presents for everyone, and then everyone
else has to buy stop buying presents for each other adults.

Speaker 5 (08:22):
Yeah, I have a sneaky suspicion my husband's mum is
going to do that too, even though she's also annoying.

Speaker 3 (08:27):
Issue.

Speaker 5 (08:27):
No, I'd be like that person where you're like, okay,
so everyone has agreed one present secret Sand and then
that one person buys off everyone.

Speaker 4 (08:34):
Well, this isn't about that.

Speaker 5 (08:36):
This is an m I the a hole, and I
think this happens to a lot of people. Would you
be upset, Laura if Christmas time came and there are
a multitude of things you wanted but you couldn't really
put your finger on the one thing because you're pretty open,
you're pretty easy, and your husband Maddy j just gave
you cash two hundred and three hundred and four hundred dollars.

Speaker 4 (08:57):
To'd be like, I just want you to be able
to buy.

Speaker 3 (09:00):
What you want.

Speaker 1 (09:01):
I wouldn't be mad, but I would think you're just
giving me my own money back, Like, I mean, it's all.

Speaker 5 (09:07):
About withdrawn from your bank account.

Speaker 1 (09:09):
But I can see how about all the money that
we have is our money, So like i'd be able
to see the three hundred dollar cash withdrawal and I'd
be like, that's not necessary.

Speaker 5 (09:17):
Yeah, but this is the thing, right, even if he's
buying a gift, it's still your money. It doesn't matter, right,
still coming from the same place. But it's the idea
of is it actually sweet to be like I just
want you to make sure you're happy to get what
you want. Being a lazy turd burger and you can't
be bothered, and it's not sweet because you put no
effort in.

Speaker 1 (09:34):
I think it depends on the type of person that
you're buying for. I think there are some people out
there who'd be very happy with a gift card. I however,
I am so forgetful that I forget that I've been
given gift cards, and then by the time I remember
I have a gift card, it's expired.

Speaker 3 (09:49):
Like I have gift cards that have just produced grace.

Speaker 1 (09:51):
I gave your like three gift cards for the one
you gave me for my birthday, dish.

Speaker 3 (09:54):
Haven't used it yet, Laura, give get back to me.

Speaker 4 (09:56):
Then I'll use it.

Speaker 1 (09:58):
I just forget and I go in and I buy
things from the shop, and then I walk out. I go,
oh my god, I should have used that discard card.
It's got nothing to do with the amount of money.
It's just got to do with my chaotic brain.

Speaker 3 (10:09):
To be fair, I.

Speaker 5 (10:09):
Actually got an engagement present that was like a voucher
for a restaurant.

Speaker 4 (10:13):
I haven't used that either. That's eighteen months.

Speaker 3 (10:16):
Look. I mean, I think it depends on the person.

Speaker 1 (10:17):
I think some people would be very grateful, But I
do think if it is your romantic partner giving a
gift card or cash is a really lazy gift, I'd probably.

Speaker 4 (10:27):
Still take it. I'm still happy with it.

Speaker 3 (10:29):
It depends on how much it was for you. Brice.
We'll hang around guys after the break live on air.

Speaker 5 (10:32):
Laura is giving me back the voucher that I gave her,
so we'll do that soon.

Speaker 1 (10:36):
No, no, before we go. How would you react if
Ben just gave you a gift? You would hate it?

Speaker 3 (10:41):
Poor Ben.

Speaker 5 (10:41):
So in the last couple of months, he's actually, because
we're long distance, he's sent me a lot of little
gift I shouldn't say a lot, three different gifts, right,
little gifts for different reasons, and congratulations for getting a
new job, a birthday present, and something.

Speaker 4 (10:54):
Else just because he loves me. And each gift.

Speaker 5 (10:56):
I've had to send back because for whatever reason, it
hasn't quite been right.

Speaker 7 (11:00):
I know. But like the real conversation, Brian, No, because
it's like light It's like one was a pair of
shoes and it was slightly the wrong side. It's things
like that, and so I think he's at the point
where he's like, I'm just going to give you the
money and you can go and buy it.

Speaker 1 (11:13):
I for sorry for Ben, because I feel like you
can't win. I do remember the lorry.

Speaker 5 (11:16):
Oh well I should have worn the wrong size pair
of shoes.

Speaker 1 (11:18):
No, I remember the last time when you guys agreed
no gifts and he didn't get you a gift and
then you were bad at him.

Speaker 5 (11:24):
Yeah, because obviously, baby, let's not do gifts means still
get me a gift.

Speaker 3 (11:31):
Britt Laura, It's gonna come as no surprise to you that.

Speaker 4 (11:34):
I am enforced baby.

Speaker 1 (11:36):
How long can you say that you're postpardon for? How
long is the postpartum period?

Speaker 5 (11:39):
I mean technically your postpartum, your whole life.

Speaker 3 (11:42):
I'll be postpart forever.

Speaker 5 (11:43):
He could have its thirtieth And you're like, I've postpartum
because it just means after birth.

Speaker 1 (11:47):
Well, I currently have an eleven week old baby. She's
strapped to my chest, and like, I do feel that
this time around is my third kid. I feel like
I'm less in the trenches.

Speaker 3 (11:56):
You know.

Speaker 1 (11:56):
I remember when Marley and Lola were little and I
just felt like a milk machine. I just felt like
I was such a mom, Like I was so in
the motherhood trench. And this time I'm getting out, I'm
doing stuff like and I just strapped this kid on and.

Speaker 3 (12:09):
I go off.

Speaker 5 (12:09):
You were like, oh, I'm such a mom, And now
you're like, I'm a mum, you know.

Speaker 4 (12:12):
I'm like, that's the vibe change here.

Speaker 3 (12:15):
We love it. I might think that I might think
I'm a cool mom.

Speaker 1 (12:17):
I'm still going through all the normal postpartum things that
like you go through, like terribly engorged boobs.

Speaker 3 (12:23):
Wheeze, wheeze.

Speaker 4 (12:25):
Yeah, don't you know, a little wheeze.

Speaker 3 (12:27):
Nah, I'm good.

Speaker 1 (12:28):
That was when I was pregnant, when I had a
dab damping all my blood.

Speaker 2 (12:31):
Er.

Speaker 1 (12:31):
No, but just I'm going through postpartum hair loss now
it's all falling out. But the big one is is
that you think you have your milk supply under control,
but it's just not always the case.

Speaker 3 (12:40):
Right.

Speaker 1 (12:41):
So the other day we were at my oldest daughter's
end of year assembly right for school, and it was
early in the morning. I'd just gotten Loller off to daycare.
Where at school I arrive I've got Poppy strap to me.
And when I arrived, the assembly was absolutely packed and
all of the chairs that the rows of chairs are
really close to each other, so I have to like
squeeze myself in with the baby strap to me.

Speaker 3 (13:02):
Anyway, it's like.

Speaker 4 (13:03):
That movie where it's like Fanny coming through.

Speaker 3 (13:05):
Yeah. I was like, which side do you want the
baby on my butt?

Speaker 1 (13:07):
So anyway, I squeeze myself through, sit down, and there's
this woman sitting in front of me, and she has
the most beautiful, dark curly black hair that's going down
the back of the chair.

Speaker 3 (13:15):
Right.

Speaker 1 (13:15):
But because it's a school assembly, all the chairs are
really closely butted together, so I kind of feel like
I'm sitting in her hair.

Speaker 5 (13:20):
It's almost like you're like on a plane, that's how
close the chairs are. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Anyway, Poppy starts
getting fussy. The principal's talking and I was like, oh,
just peeps, people around us.

Speaker 3 (13:30):
I just shove her on the boob.

Speaker 1 (13:31):
Just get on the boom, should be fine, So get
her on the boob, having a little feed. Everything's quiet, calm,
and because it's a school assembly, anytime anything happens, everyone
starts clapping.

Speaker 3 (13:41):
So everyone's clapping.

Speaker 1 (13:43):
Yeah, and being a baby, Poppy's like what's going on?

Speaker 3 (13:47):
So she just reaches herself like flings herself off my boob.

Speaker 1 (13:51):
Off my nipple and throws her head back to look
around it. Every time she does this, I like, Okay,
this is probably too much information for the pickup.

Speaker 3 (13:59):
I'm just realizing right now, but I'm going to go
with it anyway.

Speaker 1 (14:01):
I've squirted breast milk out because it just comes out right,
and you never had a baby before.

Speaker 3 (14:06):
Once you had that let down, it just flies out
of you right.

Speaker 5 (14:09):
And they thought they were getting streamers from the roof.

Speaker 3 (14:11):
They got breast milk.

Speaker 1 (14:12):
It flew out of me and it glistened down the
hair of this woman who was sitting in front of me,
rate her with this fine silver mist that was just
all over the back of her hair.

Speaker 3 (14:24):
And it probably got a blow dry.

Speaker 1 (14:25):
Everyone in my row who was sitting around me sore,
and everyone was like, do you know when you're so
humiliated for someone else that you can't speak?

Speaker 3 (14:34):
Did you tell her?

Speaker 4 (14:35):
No, Laura, you have to.

Speaker 5 (14:37):
This is like how you never tell me when there's
something in my teeth on my face. If you just
breast milk a woman's hair that's black and lish.

Speaker 4 (14:43):
You have to tell them.

Speaker 3 (14:44):
How am I going to do that?

Speaker 1 (14:45):
Tap her on the shoulder and be like, I'm so sorry,
I yes, I have you have my breast milk in
your hair. Yes, it's great, it's protein rich.

Speaker 4 (14:52):
She walked.

Speaker 5 (14:53):
Imagine what it looked like she was walking around with
in her hair all days.

Speaker 1 (14:56):
Will look like a misting, you know, and something that's
like a misspray ball and goes.

Speaker 4 (14:59):
It was like that.

Speaker 1 (15:00):
But just need we need to have a talk. I
have to admit one more thing. It happened twice more.

Speaker 5 (15:08):
You're awful, not awful for doing it, but you have
to tell someone if you spray milk. It's like an
unspoken rule. You spray breast milk on someone's hair, the rule.

Speaker 3 (15:18):
Is you tell them No, I don't know. I just
I couldn't. I was too humiliated.

Speaker 1 (15:21):
You also, don't you underestimate the projectile of this, like
I could squirt you from here.

Speaker 3 (15:25):
If I try to do it, it goes. Sorry, we
need to go.

Speaker 4 (15:28):
That's it.

Speaker 3 (15:28):
That's a muster to date.

Speaker 5 (15:32):
If you missed an If you want to re listen
to that break, you can listen to us on demand.

Speaker 4 (15:37):
Just make sure you search the pig Up podcast wherever
you get your podcasts.