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October 6, 2025 • 16 mins

Laura is off on maternity leave so her beautiful husband Matty J is stepping in for the rest of the year. 

Britt & Matt chat about the important connection between a couple and their midwife, the different person you become when you go on holidays and kid playdates as a potential side hustle?

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
My Heart podcasts, Heem More Kiss podcast playlist and listen
live on the Free iHeart app.

Speaker 2 (00:19):
Good pickup with Britt Hogley and Laura Ben Radio work
our windows down.

Speaker 1 (00:25):
If my worldries in the dust only good Gab Doug
all down. I don't much, but yeah, Anna, I'll bigget
and what I want.

Speaker 2 (00:35):
It don't matter where gone. This is the pickup.

Speaker 1 (00:39):
Happy Monday, everyone, what a day here. It's Britt and
no longer Laura.

Speaker 3 (00:45):
We have lost Laura to Brown three of motherhood. It's
Maddie Jazz, It's me.

Speaker 2 (00:50):
I'm here and I just want to say it is
such a pleasure to be in the studio. Adding it
a little bit of testosterone which has been craving in
this space for a long time.

Speaker 1 (00:59):
Honestly, you walked in here and you said it's two
pink too purple?

Speaker 3 (01:02):
Where can I put my football jerseys?

Speaker 2 (01:03):
And know I'm going to bring in fishing ruds tomorrow?
I think you speak on that.

Speaker 3 (01:08):
It's a pleasure to have you, Maddie.

Speaker 2 (01:10):
I have to say I'm so sorry I've come day
one with the voice which is running at like forty
percent of its normal capacity.

Speaker 1 (01:17):
As long as your personality and your humor is at
one hundred percent.

Speaker 2 (01:20):
The personality is here, the voice is not I have
to say, and I promise you this is going to
be the only time I talk about football whilst I
fill in The Broncos won yesterday, Oh my god for
final Reese Welsh Clive Churchill winner. Can you believe it?
Bripp nineteen years since we won a Grand Final? Incredible scenes.

Speaker 3 (01:38):
I could care less personally.

Speaker 1 (01:40):
I actually had it on in the background on silence,
like I just had the volume down so I couldn't
hear what.

Speaker 2 (01:46):
Was having Why would you do that?

Speaker 1 (01:48):
But I wanted to watch Teddy Swims. That's why I
put it on because he was the entertainment at the start,
and he was my first dance song for my wedding.

Speaker 2 (01:56):
Well look, Teddy and I very similar. We both have
sore throats. I was wondering if he was going to
sing live, and I can confirm I was there watching,
paying very close attention, and he was in factinging live
and it was fantastic.

Speaker 3 (02:09):
What's funny? Because I heard like, it's not funny.

Speaker 1 (02:12):
But I saw a lot of opinions online. Some people
said he was amazing and some people didn't love it.

Speaker 3 (02:18):
They didn't.

Speaker 1 (02:19):
I think people don't know who he was, but I
wanted to know what it was like in person because
on the TV I frothed it.

Speaker 2 (02:24):
He was great and he had a little song that
was a nod to Akkadaca, which was lovely. Yeah, and
can I just say they must have spent the whole
marketing budget on the pyro Technics. It was so hot.
I was like, goodness me, it's twenty six degrees in
Sydney and I have flames in my face and Teddy's
wearing a skirt. It was too much.

Speaker 3 (02:43):
It was a killed, big show.

Speaker 2 (02:44):
Matt.

Speaker 1 (02:44):
We are happy to have you feeling in for the
next couple of months while your wife is ontnatly.

Speaker 3 (02:48):
We are going to talk all.

Speaker 1 (02:49):
About it and just to like make you feel really welcome.
Today you did beat out Chris Hemsworth, Robert Irwin, who
else produced Grace. We had Larry MD Larry Mday.

Speaker 3 (03:01):
You beat out a A lot of people really wanted
this position. You're really lucky.

Speaker 2 (03:05):
It is an honor to be sitting here in this
studio with this amazing team.

Speaker 1 (03:10):
Well, after the break, what I want to know, and
I'm assuming a lot of people want to know is
some info on Laura and the birth, So is there
anything you can spill for us?

Speaker 2 (03:18):
Look, Poppy is doing very well. She does have a
unique little habit that I will talk about in just
a second. Cute.

Speaker 1 (03:25):
We have the wonderful Mattie Jay feeling for us at
the moment while his wife Laura is on maternityly welcome Maddie.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
She is currently at home juggling three kids covered in
vomit and milk. So shout out to Laura, who's having
a beautiful time at home right now.

Speaker 1 (03:40):
And you're like, sorry, babe, I have to go to work.

Speaker 2 (03:42):
I said, you put me up for this. I had
to leave her, and she was angry at me. As
I was out the door, I was like, I didn't
want this.

Speaker 3 (03:48):
I didn't want this.

Speaker 2 (03:50):
None of us did. None of us said sorry, Laura,
she's listening right now. But Poppy arrived and I think
I said, Britt, you might know this. Laura was induced. Yeah,
So it was like pre booked.

Speaker 1 (04:02):
I went to Italy on I was really hoping that
she would come before I left for at my one
week holiday because I wanted to cut the cord.

Speaker 2 (04:08):
The cord is a task that I don't want, so
I'm upset that you weren't there to take that responsibility
off me.

Speaker 1 (04:14):
Well, that's why I volunteered myself because Laura said that
you were not about it, like it was like cutting
Cala Marie. You didn't want to do it grossed you out.
So I was going to volunteers tribute the.

Speaker 2 (04:23):
Next time if the red one. But the weird thing
about being induced is that most often it happens in
the morning. So we were in the hospital at nine
point thirty to get induced and we had an amazing midwife.
And with the midwife, we didn't pick her. It was
just you know, she was looking after our room on
that particular day. Chantelle, beautiful midwife, shout out the great energy.

(04:45):
We loved her. We just clicked, we got along and
then we were with Chantelle for the entire day.

Speaker 1 (04:51):
You really want that connection when someone's like between your legs,
don't you totally like you want that.

Speaker 2 (04:56):
You know it's and it's Chantel came to us, and
you know, we were so stoked. And I'm sure all
the midwives are fantastic. I'm sure there's not like a
bad midwife out there, although but with Laura, it was
taking a long time, okay, I don't want to say
she was dragging her feet, but it was now it
was one o'clock, it was two o'clock. We're all waiting.

(05:18):
It was then six o'clock and Chantell came into the
room and she said, hey, guys, I have to let
you know my shift is going to finish at six o'clock.
I'm about to clock off. And I was like, what
do you mean, Chantelle, We've been here the whole day.
Surely the rulers you just have to see through the
end of the pregnancy, like the birth.

Speaker 1 (05:36):
Well no, because if you think about it, some people's
like labors go for twenty four to forty hours.

Speaker 2 (05:42):
And Chantelle's like, I've got dinner book. She's like, i
can stay till six fifteen and then I've got to
go Italian at seven, right, And then I was looking
at Laura and saying, are you close. We'd have a
look at downstairs, and she was only six centimeters dilated,
which for those wondering it's not enough, I now know, okay,
And then good question. I think it was eight, I
think ten ten apparently Grace, Grace, thank you, Where were you? Grace?

(06:08):
But then we had to wave goodbye to Chantel. We
had a new midwife and she was equally as nice,
but it was just we'd only known each other for
about half an hour before Laura starts pushing, and it
was too soon.

Speaker 3 (06:19):
It is too soon, it's too intimate.

Speaker 1 (06:20):
And I understand that it would be upsetting that that
person you formed the connection with for eight hours has
left you.

Speaker 2 (06:26):
Well, Chantelle didn't even call to check on us after
she left. I think Sarah, the new midwife, who again
was lovely, but I just it was speed ramping through
the relationship. We're shaking hands, saying hi, next minute she's there,
the baby's in her arms.

Speaker 3 (06:41):
Yeah, it's just like a hot date on a Friday night.

Speaker 2 (06:42):
I know, But it all went well. I did cut
the umbilical cord and guess what, I got to keep
the placenta the scissors. Oh.

Speaker 3 (06:50):
I was like, are you eating the placenta?

Speaker 2 (06:52):
It was offered to me and I had to politely
say no.

Speaker 1 (06:55):
Why, Like was it ever of interest to you because
a lot of people make the placenta now into capsules. Yeah,
and they're like taking them like a vitamin because it's
the most nutrient dense thing on the planet if they
roll your eyes, Producer Grace, it.

Speaker 2 (07:08):
Was tempting, but on this occasion, I just went for
the scissors.

Speaker 3 (07:12):
Okay, that's a bit more boring.

Speaker 1 (07:13):
A lot of other people who apparently bury it in
the yard and stuff like that.

Speaker 3 (07:17):
It's like you use it for plants and stuff.

Speaker 2 (07:19):
It helps grow, and that's a beautiful thing if that's
your jam. But once again, for me, I'm into arts
and crafts. I just wanted my hands on those scissors,
and I've got them, and I'll give them to Poppy
when she turns twenty one.

Speaker 3 (07:29):
So what are you going to do with them?

Speaker 2 (07:32):
Hold them?

Speaker 1 (07:32):
I know both of you. They will not last a week.
They will be lost somewhere.

Speaker 2 (07:36):
They're in the cutlery drawer right now. So when the
kids need arts and crafts like salad it or if
anyone happens to give birth in our house, good news
and be like ole God can get cut with those scissors.

Speaker 1 (07:47):
Okay, last question, so who actually delivers the baby? The
midwife or did you have like an obstetrician that physically
pulls it out.

Speaker 2 (07:55):
Shout out to Bobby the obstetricians. Okay, the ob what's up?
He came in it all happens really quickly. It's hard
to hang on.

Speaker 3 (08:03):
A minute ago she was dragging her feet.

Speaker 2 (08:05):
No, but then the pointian like, you're sneeze and it's over.

Speaker 1 (08:08):
Oh, there's so many women listening to this right now,
you do not sneeze.

Speaker 2 (08:13):
That's not let me just this is going terrible.

Speaker 3 (08:15):
Let's go right.

Speaker 1 (08:18):
And we have a guest host for the rest of
the year, Maddy j. Which if you're not across many
j it's Laura Burns's husband.

Speaker 2 (08:26):
Is it to the end of the year? Is that
what I read too? Actually it was a month? Is
it was a month? No, it's to the end of
the year.

Speaker 3 (08:32):
How do you not know?

Speaker 2 (08:33):
Because I just say yes to things and I don't
write them down.

Speaker 3 (08:37):
Yeah, so you are here.

Speaker 1 (08:39):
In fact, two days ago we got a message from
Matt that said when am I starting?

Speaker 2 (08:43):
And that was a worry and I apologize. Also, I
was like coming into the office as well today. So
from today onwards, I'll be ten out of ten.

Speaker 1 (08:52):
You were late, you didn't know when you were starting,
and then you couldn't get in the building because you
didn't have a key. And then the ultimate mistake, you
didn't bring me a coffee.

Speaker 2 (09:00):
No one is perfect, brit and I'm setting the bar
low to begin with. So from this moment on, it's up.

Speaker 1 (09:06):
Hey, No, we love to have you here. So you
you had a baby while I was gone. You and
Laura and I went to Italy, very very different lives
Laura and I.

Speaker 2 (09:16):
How is Ben by the way.

Speaker 1 (09:17):
Yeah, so my husband Ben, for those that don't know,
he lives in Italy. So we're this like weird long
distance relationship, which I know people don't understand.

Speaker 3 (09:26):
We're married, we've been together three years.

Speaker 1 (09:28):
We have never lived together, and so many people are
constantly like, how do you know who that person really
is if you've never lived with them? And I'm like,
maybe that's the key to a successful relationship, is not
knowing who you married.

Speaker 2 (09:41):
But I.

Speaker 3 (09:44):
Think it's healthy.

Speaker 2 (09:45):
I wish I'm going to have to take your word
for it.

Speaker 1 (09:48):
But you know what, I just think it could be
the key to keeping like the spice alive in a relationship,
because you the honeymoon phase is elongated, because what would
you say, honeymoon phase is six months?

Speaker 2 (09:59):
Maybe I would say three weeks at most, two months
at the most.

Speaker 1 (10:04):
Yeah, and then it starts to get a bit of
like monotony, and.

Speaker 2 (10:08):
Because when you guys had the honeymoon period go so
long that you actually were in the honeymoon period itself
after the wedding.

Speaker 1 (10:14):
Well, we didn't even get a honeymoon, like we basically
had a long weekend because we got married and then
just he had to go back to Italy and I
had to come back to Australia and anyway.

Speaker 3 (10:21):
But my point is it.

Speaker 1 (10:22):
Really keeps a spice alive because you go eight weeks
without it seeing each other, then you see each other
for two weeks, you think it's like the desire is
there and we got so much more to talk about.

Speaker 2 (10:32):
And do do you guys when you meet each other,
do you then just.

Speaker 3 (10:36):
The horizontal days of love?

Speaker 2 (10:37):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (10:39):
How is this three PM worthy? Well, I mean the
answer is.

Speaker 2 (10:42):
Well, you're glowing. So I'm going to resume. I'm gonna
put two and two to make five.

Speaker 1 (10:45):
And see the answer is it's a it's a busy
first few days.

Speaker 2 (10:49):
Well, zaid, you've hobbled into the studio todays.

Speaker 1 (10:54):
No, it's a busy few days. But then it's actually
just goes spoke to No One pretty quick.

Speaker 2 (10:57):
But then after you do that horizontal dance. What happens then?
I mean, you've got your suitcase, you're oh yeah.

Speaker 1 (11:02):
So that's what I actually was going to say. If
I just got very sidetracked for a long distance relationship.
I just become a slot on holiday. I don't know
if this is normal. I am like a sloth that
has taken a sleeping tablet. I'm so messy. I think
at home, I'm pretty neat, right, but when I go
on holiday, poor Ben, Like I would just open my
suitcase and then I live out of it.

Speaker 3 (11:22):
I don't unpack anything.

Speaker 1 (11:23):
I think anyone that is taking clothes out and putting
them on a hanger is a sociopath. Like, I do
not know a person, do you that like hangs there?

Speaker 2 (11:31):
Look, time is of the essence. You're there for a
short period of time. You don't want to waste any
second clothes putting away clothes when really you're going to
be spending most of the time they're undressed. Am I right, Brett?
Am I right?

Speaker 3 (11:44):
So you got been blushing?

Speaker 1 (11:46):
Now?

Speaker 3 (11:48):
No, but I just become this, I become this real slob.

Speaker 1 (11:50):
But to the point that like, are we going to
have a shower and I'll walk through the loungerym and
I'll take my clothes off and just drop them on
the floor.

Speaker 3 (11:56):
And then I won't pick them up.

Speaker 1 (11:57):
I will step over them for the whole time. And
I'm like, who have I become?

Speaker 2 (12:01):
I think it's totally fine. Whenever I go to a hotel,
the hangars are there. Really is a decoration. It's like
a Bible in the bedside table. You're not going to
read it. It's just there to like let you know
you are in a hotel room with the hangers.

Speaker 3 (12:12):
And everything else, and that you're safe if you need it.

Speaker 1 (12:14):
They're not functional, no, And then you know what the
worst part is when you get home that suitcase will
stay on my bedroom floor for the next four weeks.

Speaker 2 (12:24):
Did Ben say anything about the wardrobe at all?

Speaker 3 (12:26):
Is horrified?

Speaker 2 (12:28):
Okay, great, it's horrified.

Speaker 3 (12:30):
He's like, what is going on?

Speaker 2 (12:31):
So you're still in the honeymoon period, whereas for Ben,
he's in the depths of hell right now.

Speaker 1 (12:35):
It goes back to like you just don't know who
you're with when you're in long distance.

Speaker 2 (12:39):
Congratulations, Ben's surprise. I've seen something online. This is a
controversial spin on a child playdate, and I want you
to tell me if this is acceptable or not.

Speaker 1 (12:52):
Okay, is this like something like I swear this was
my friend and it really was, you.

Speaker 3 (12:59):
Like, I have a friend.

Speaker 2 (13:01):
Look not quite. You're closed. You're closed. Okay. We all
know that having kids, something that is very normal is
having playdates. Yeah right, yes, but there's one thing that
this mom, she's from the States, she is doing off
the back end of these playdates, which is getting a
lot of people up in arms. Okay, have a listen
to this.

Speaker 4 (13:21):
So I sent over my Venmo request and it just said, hey,
I had a great playdate. I sent you a Venmo
for thirty six dollars for food and supplies. So this
other mom said, thanks for the hospitality, but this is
like a price gouging scheme to like make money, and

(13:45):
they called it like a bill. While her son was over,
I just kept on my notes tab, a running tab
of everything that her son used during the playdate.

Speaker 3 (13:58):
This can't be real.

Speaker 2 (14:00):
I actually think price gouging. That's very unfair because thirty
six dollars. Let's just remind people that a babysit of
per how we'll charge about thirty six up to forty
five dollars. So I actually think it's a very fair investment.
But what is she charging?

Speaker 3 (14:15):
Did they go to like a theme park? What's the
money for?

Speaker 2 (14:19):
I think it's just you know, at home, they're going
to use coloring in paper. There's materials that child would
need to be fed. So it's going to cover things
like food. Food's not cheap, cost a living bread. Okay,
when you answer this, does Delilah your dog go on playdates? Yes? Okay?
Does it cost you money?

Speaker 3 (14:40):
I send her food?

Speaker 2 (14:42):
You send food? Okay? Yeah? And if you didn't send
her food, do you think it would be unreasonable if
the person looking after Delilah would say, hey, I'm going
to charge you thirty dollars because I had to feed
her and also poo bags and et cetera.

Speaker 1 (14:55):
I don't think we can relate my dog to kids.

Speaker 2 (14:58):
You're a pet parent.

Speaker 1 (14:59):
Breat But what I will say is I remember take like,
let's cast our minds back to when I was on
a playdate. I'm one of four kids, but my parents,
if I went on a playdate to someone else's house,
they would send me with money for that kind of stuff.
So you'd go with like, I don't know, it was
ten dollars fifteen dollars, and that would be your pool entry,
and that would be your food for lunch or whatever

(15:20):
it's like.

Speaker 3 (15:20):
So it was never expected for the parent to pay.

Speaker 2 (15:23):
But essentially, your mum was doing exactly what this woman wants,
but she was just frontending it. So you agreed. No,
Because no, you agreed that parents out there should be
charging for playdates pretty hotly.

Speaker 1 (15:34):
No, I do not from your mouth, I absolutely do not.
I think that that poor kid's not gonna have any friends.

Speaker 3 (15:39):
No one is going to want to go and play
at that kid's house.

Speaker 1 (15:41):
You cannot charge for a piece of coloring paper. If
you're inviting a kid to your house to have a playdate,
then the food is on you.

Speaker 3 (15:50):
The chicken nuggets are on you. You're not saying, here's
two dollars for a chicken nugget.

Speaker 2 (15:54):
I disagree that child will have friends. Maley, Poppy and Lola.
We'll go over there if she's gonna have a playdate
and take my kids for a couple of hours, and
it's only going to cost me thirty six dollars.

Speaker 1 (16:04):
So I do not believe you were ever going to
send a Venmo request to anyone for a play date.
If any kid comes to your house for a playdate,
you are not ven moowen or it's a quick way
to get cans.

Speaker 2 (16:14):
No, I use PayPal.

Speaker 3 (16:18):
Oh yeah, your kids are not gonna have any friends. Hey,
that is it for us
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