August 21, 2025 • 16 mins
ASK UNCUT: How do you deal with a clingy ex? The kids are addicted to their phones (and so are the adults), and Laura is taking Marlie to her first ever concert tonight!
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
Hi Heart podcasts, hear more Kiss podcast playlist and listen
live on the Free iHeart app.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Are The Pickup with Britt Hockley and Laura Burn. Bady
your work, our windows done, That's my world, Risen the
dust only bookab Bugle.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
I've don't much, but yeah I'm not.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
I'll big get and what I want it don't.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Matter where goes.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
This is the Pickup.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
You're listening to the Pickup with Britt Hockey and Laura
Burn and it is.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
It's Brittany's birthday and you can a'll give us sound effects?
Never when do we have to start doing our own
sound effects? Sure, it's my birthday, guys. Thirty two. Thank
you so much everybody.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
I'm easy you mean thirty two for now? Eight?
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Happy thirty second again, Brittany.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
I can't wait for the cupcakes to arrive.
Speaker 3 (01:03):
Would you, guys?
Speaker 1 (01:03):
Yeah, that grace ordered a little bit belated. And I
also have a birthday present for you, but it's in
my car and the reason for that is because it's
too heavy to carry inside.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
It's I really want to treasure chest of money.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
I wish, I wish, I really want to warn you
because it's actually not that heavy. I just can't carry
because I'm too pregnant and I was puffed.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Can I tell you what I think actually happened. I
just think you forgot to get out of your car.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
No, no, no, no long story s.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Another friend who works with us also had a birthday
today and her present was considerably lighter, so I opted
for the lighter one, and then they're heavy one.
Speaker 3 (01:37):
It's two boxes.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
I see you made your choice.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
Yeah, two boxes?
Speaker 2 (01:41):
What could have been part? Like? Have you a marble
statue of statue here?
Speaker 4 (01:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (01:45):
That's why I'm going for a nude of me and
my dog.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
I got it commissioned, custom made. Why you and your
dog both nude together?
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Told me I had to be nude in it? What
give me a hint? Give me one?
Speaker 3 (01:57):
Sorry.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
I really wish we could play all of that back,
and that was a possibility because at no point did
I say that had to be nude.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
That came from you, and that's something that you tell
me in private, So.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Give me.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
It could break a marble statue.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Got wait to find it?
Speaker 2 (02:19):
All right, it is time for Usk on Cut Now.
This is something we do every single week on our podcast.
Life on Cut podcast is where you guys write in
and call up with your problems. We do our best
to answer them, and we have a range of problems
like from the big, the dark, the heavy, to like
the light and funny. Today's one is about a clingy X.
We have Sadie on the line. Sadie, you're having a
(02:40):
problem with your partner's clinging X.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
Is that right?
Speaker 4 (02:43):
That's right. We're having an issue with a snapchat streak
that she doesn't want to let go of.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
So what's just to be clear, what's a snapchat streak?
It's like that you communicate X amount of days in
a row or something.
Speaker 4 (02:54):
Yeah, so when you send a photo to each other
each day, you then get a number. So say you've
got number three, Well, then you've been snapchatting each other
for three.
Speaker 3 (03:02):
Days, gotcha?
Speaker 1 (03:02):
So how many days have they been snapchatting each other for?
And also how long ago did they break up?
Speaker 3 (03:07):
Probably more importantly.
Speaker 4 (03:09):
Two years ago, and this streak was like six hundred
and eighty days.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
Okay, but that doesn't make any sense. Have they been
just doing this the whole time that they've been broken
up they've still been snapchatting? Or is it a case
that they did it in the past, and she's just
kept this streak alive.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
I don't understand how it works.
Speaker 4 (03:23):
I assume they've broken up, not how to streak, and
then restarted it when they kind of became friendly again.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
And this is your current partners and his ex yep,
this is my current partner's ex partner.
Speaker 3 (03:35):
This is so weird. Obviously you can't control what she does.
But have you talked to your boyfriend about it? What
did he say?
Speaker 4 (03:42):
So, we've just moved into our new home. We've moved
out of the home they owned together, and the general
kind of idea was once we move out, house is settled,
where I'm just going to distance myself kind of get
rid of the streak, which he did, and she decided
to restore it, which I had no idea he would do.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
So does that mean that he's also still engaging or
can it be one way?
Speaker 4 (04:02):
So?
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Is she just messaging him and he's not responding or
is he snapping back?
Speaker 4 (04:06):
So he wasn't replying to any the snaps. And when
the streak has died, she's paid to restore the streak.
It's then diet for the second time, and then she's
again restored it again just with him, not like him
not snapschotting her and she just keeps paying to restore.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
It, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (04:22):
It sounds very weird, and obviously she has something going
on that she.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
Maybe hasn't resolved or isn't over. But it doesn't.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
But it does sound like your partner's doing all the
right things. It sounds like he's not engaging, he's not replying,
So there is no way that you're going to be
able to control what she does.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Yeah, but you can control him opening them like he does.
Just because she's sending them doesn't mean he has to
open them and have a look at them and have
that connection.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
I opening them though, or is he just like this
is weird? What's he doing?
Speaker 4 (04:47):
I think he's opening them and then just leaving them.
But then she messaged both of us saying, you know,
wasn't fair, that that wasn't a conversation had that he
wanted to delete the streak and stuff, and.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
That you had me hookline and thinker for his convo.
This is she's she's crazy, she looks crazy. He needs
to block.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
Her partner too, So I'm kind of like, how would
your partner feel about this? Now?
Speaker 2 (05:12):
He needs to just block her, like you can't be
holding onto your past like that, you've sold houses, moved on,
you're moving with new people, like you are so far
moved on. If she's that unhinged that she's messed like,
it's almost embarrassing in childhood, like to message you and
be like, you should have told me if you wanted
to break our snapchat streak. That is the weirdest thing
I've ever heard on the show.
Speaker 4 (05:32):
I'm actually ambage both of us and kind of had
to dig with both of us saying that we're disrespectful
and you know, like I thought we were all friends
kind of thing. And it's kind of like, just leave
us alone, let us move on, like, you know, just
like let us be.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
I find this so confusing. I feel like everyone who's
listening to this now is gonna be like, what, I'm
too old for this. I don't understand it.
Speaker 3 (05:51):
I've never had such Laura.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
Everyone's too old for this. This isn't an age limit thing.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
She feels like, really childish behavior.
Speaker 2 (05:58):
I would be telling him to I mean, this is
up to him and it's on him. He needs to
disengage from her, like by opening them he's encouraging it.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Like whether he's he's seen it one hundred percent.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
She knows that it's a funnel to him, it's still
that that connection in this little, like secret, little tunnel
that she's got to him. It's the last form of
connection he needs to if he respects and values you.
In my opinion, he just needs to end that. Like
he can block her, he can unfriend her, he can
do whatever. But like, just so you know, it's weird.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
It's a control thing on her side of things, I think,
and I'm just like, you need to cut that last, Heather.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
I mean, snapchat you kissing, get a snapchat back of
you guys, like get engaged or something.
Speaker 3 (06:41):
Oh I God, let us know how it goes.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
But I do think it's a pretty clear and easy one.
I do think that your partner has to take a
little bit of responsibility and make.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
It very clear that the streak is no more.
Speaker 4 (06:51):
No more streaks, no more streaks, no more.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
Thanks Sadie, Thanks.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
Laura.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
I stumbled across this study online a couple of days
ago by a psychologist that I follow, Jonathan Hite. He
speaks a lot about kids and anxiety, and I guess
like social media addiction. And he was talking about a
study by an Australian journalist for The Australian. Her name
is Roz Thomas. Now, this is a study where Roz
(07:20):
spent nine months interviewing Australian teenagers on their phone addiction.
I want to read you the opening line to her
report off the back of this nine months, it says,
one week without our phones, we would rather die. Now,
that is a comment by three fifteen year old girls.
And I want to talk about some of the alarming
(07:41):
statistics that she found off the back of this nine months.
She said that not one teenager that she interviewed in
that period said that they weren't addicted to their phone,
and everyone they knew was addicted to their phone. But
the interesting part of this is what she found out
is that they don't want to be so they're hyper
aware enough to know that they have a problem. They
(08:02):
have this lack of attention span. They're saying that they
have high levels of depression and anxiety. They're saying that
they're losing motivation. It's making them lazier. They don't want
to do anything. They want to go outside, but they're saying,
we don't want to feel like that, and I think
that it's a really interesting question about what are we
supposed to do, What are we supposed to be putting
in place, because we live in a world where we
(08:23):
need our phones, Like even kids at school are on
their iPads now, we can't live a life without them.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
Yeah, what was there? What was the age demographic of this?
Just teenagers in general? Yeah, it's very hard in terms
of like the school environments and we've only just started,
like my daughter has only just started school, but using
computers and using screens, maybe not mobile phones, but iPads
and laptops. It's kind of just part and parcel with
education these days. I think the phone part of it though,
(08:50):
and if kids are saying that, we all know everyone's
addicted to their phones, but like there has to be
some parent intervention in that there has to be some
rules around screen time. I don't even think a fifteen
or a fourteen year old should have unvetted like access
to a phone without there being some rules around how
they're using it.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
I think you'd be hard pressed. And I agree the
problem is, like you're hard pressed to find a fifteen
year old that's like okay, every fifteen year old's got
a phone right at this day and age, you need
it just to contact your parents, you need to talk
to your friends. Like, I don't think there's a fifteen
year old out there that doesn't have access to a phone.
You're hard pressed to then find a teenager that's not
going to be able to utilize that phone in another way,
(09:26):
Like just because your mom says, hey, you are not
to use Instagram, tell me a fifteen year old that's
going to listen to that.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
But does a fifteen year old need their phone twenty
four to seven in their room, at their hand and
at their access at all times? Like are they're not
specific times a day? Because I mean, I don't know
what the schools are at these I know there's some
schools that say no phone policy and they actually make
them hand over their phones at the start of the day.
And then there's other schools that have a no phone policy,
(09:52):
but it's like only if you get caught so you
could have it. You know, you're not allowed to have it,
but like it's day in your back, kids will obviously
figure out ways to like, you know, hide it in
their bag.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
And look through whatever they've got to look through.
Speaker 1 (10:02):
Surely, there has to be like some caveats for like
times when they can and can't have their phone, like
coming from school, do you homework, You're not having a
phone for five hours.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
Well, this psychologist went on a bit of a deep dive.
So Jonathan Hyde, who this guy, I said, I follow about.
You know, he studies a lot of their anxious teenagers.
He's really fascinating for anyone that wants to go and
look into him. But he was talking about the best
thing to do is you can't keep it from your
kids forever. But like set the rule. For example, the
number one rule is that your teenager or kid cannot
(10:32):
have the phone in their room. And what that means
unsupervised use of it. Yeah, it's not even just that
it's unsupervised, but all of a sudden when they go
to that room for bed, they can't be up late scrolling.
They can't be like because a big problem is their
lack of sleep. They can't turn off. Some of these
teenagers were saying their anxiety is so high, Like one
girl was saying she wakes up every two hours to
(10:53):
check social media to make sure no one has commented
on something that's mean and nasty and that's so, that's her. Oh,
I just can't fathom it.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
But I mean the other part of this is adults
are addicted to their phones, right, Like we're all addicted
to our phones. So like, if we can't help ourselves,
if we all struggle with that addiction, what chance to
kids have in this equation? You know, Like I don't
I don't know if I want to say that I'm
addicted to my phone in the same way that like,
you know, you could be addicted to other things in life,
but I absolutely have it on me a hell of
(11:23):
a lot of time. And I think that sometimes you
can be like, oh, I'm just doing work or I'm
just doing this. But how many times are you like
just sending an email and all of a sudden you
found yourself scrolling on Instagram. You're like, WHOA, I don't
know how I got here. I don't know why am
I looking at baby goats? Like I wasn't meant to
be here. The thing is is, like everything about your
iPhone and we all know this, it's designed to engage
your attention as long as possible. Kids already have a
(11:46):
short attention span. They're still trying to figure out self control.
They're still learning.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Yeah, And I think if you ask yourself, if you're
trying to work it out, one of the sort of
tests you can do, can you walk into another room
without taking your phone? Because think of how many times
you might go from the lounge room to your bedroom
and you have to find your phone first to take it.
Speaker 1 (12:04):
Like the good thing, No, the good thing about being
super forgetful is that I lose my phone about seven
times day and so I don't know where it is
for most my Like, if I'm at home, I've lost it.
It's somewhere and then I have to get my husband
to come and call it as we can go find it.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
I highly recommend Britt.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
Big exciting things are happening in my household tonight.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
It actually is big and exciting.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
It really, I mean, I'm excited.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
I don't know if anyone else is going to be,
but I'll share it with you anyway. Look, my daughter
as she's six, her name is Marley, and we are
taking her to her very first concert to go and
see Alex Warren, who I mean, you guys will know
the song if you don't know the name. He sings
massive songs like this one, Oh.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Bang, on amazing.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Well, look, Marley is ground zero of like the Alex
Warren obsession in our household. So she came home from
school this one day and she was like, Mommy.
Speaker 3 (12:52):
I heard this song that's gonna play at my wedding.
And I was like, what are you talking about? Red Flag?
Speaker 2 (12:57):
She's five, She was literally five at the time. Are
you like, hang on, who are you married?
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Yeah? No, I know who she's marrying. That love affair
has been going on for a little while. She's had
a boyfriend since kindergarten. Wow, starts young like nothing, It's
like innocent, So we need to.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
Change his break. It's not how young is it? Can
you go to a concert? How young? Can you have
a boyfriend and get married?
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Anyway, he has a song that's called Carry You Home,
and she's obsessed with it.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Right, And he's come to Australia.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
He's actually performing all around and tickets to his concerts
sold out in literally a hot second. I think they're local,
like our local concert. The tickets it's sold out within
ten minutes, so we.
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Were never It's not the big like Olympic stadium.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
He's like smaller ish, I reckon he would have sold
that out anyway. Honestly, it went so quick, but I
really wanted to take Marley, and then we had the
opportunity of interviewing him on the show, so we they
borrowed and stole and I'm able to take her coming.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
I'm only putting you on the radio.
Speaker 3 (13:49):
Give me his tickets, Give my daughter, my six year
old daughter a ticket to go.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
Okay, So this is my question though, Like it's an
all ages concert, right, but it's not. The venue isn't
particularly an all ages venue. Like there's no seats, it's standing.
There'll be a mosh pit, and I'm taking it.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
I don't think Alex Warren has a mosh pit.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
It's it's not like a moshes in like everyone jumping,
but there will be like a lot of people standing.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
Marley's just crowdsurfing.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
Should we light and easy to throw shuck at that child?
Do you think?
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Firstly, do you think six is too young to take
a kid to a concert? And also how old were
you at your first concert?
Speaker 3 (14:23):
And do you even remember my.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
First I think I was like mid twenties. Yes, I
live a sheltered life. Yes I didn't go to a
concert young at all. A lot of Wiggles.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
There's a lot wrong with tonight, Like, only four weeks
five weeks off having a baby, and I'm taking a six.
Speaker 3 (14:37):
Year old to a concert. What's wrong?
Speaker 2 (14:38):
I used to go to the theater as a child.
If that sets the tone for who we were, yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
It really does. My mom plays a lot.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
My mom used to do theater and we used to
go watch her. I think, look, how young is too young?
It depends on the exit. No, it depends on the concept.
For starters, Alex Warren is very innocent, like, he's not
a swearer, He's not rude and crude, He's not not
like he's about love songs. He's got the number one
wedding song in the world right now, you know.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
But I did see him on stage the other day
and he did throw a few f bombs around.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
I think it is going to.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Be slightly less age appropriate than what I might have
thought originally.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
Is it the Wiggles, No, I think the problem is
just like getting her out for the length of the concert.
I almost feel like you're probably better off to let
her hear those songs that she loves, Like you go
for the carry Me Home her wedding song, and you
go for the ordinary, and then her lasting an entire
concert standing up in a wash pit might be too late.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
That we're not staying there for the on call, that's
for sure. But I remember going like so. I remember
my first ever concert. My mum took me and my
sister to Silverchair and how.
Speaker 3 (15:37):
Old I was so little?
Speaker 1 (15:38):
I think I must have been ten, ten or eleven,
except I never actually saw Silverchair.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
We went, it was very exciting. We saw like the warm.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
Up band, and then I fell asleep in her lap
and so she watched Silverchair and I slept.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
In my mum's lap whilst it was on.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
Okay, so you're too young, you're too young. I'm worried
that's going to be like a retake of that. And
I've kind of like I wanted to do this. I
thought that she would really.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Love it, and now that it's here, I'm wondering whether
I really just bit off a bit more than I
can chew.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
I just remembered my first concert. Actually it was Robbie Williams,
and I worked it as security and I wish I
was joking, I wish you were eighteen yep, and our
security me squiggly thing. But it was my only way
to get a ticket to seem so I had to
pretend our security. Sorry, I'm not stopping anyone from getting
into that concert.
Speaker 3 (16:23):
I was like that, it's more so the fact that
you got into going to concerts so late. Now for
Port Macquarie, Oh that's right, No one goes, no one
does anything. Quarry ah, guys like, that's it from us,
Hi Heart podcasts, hear more Kiss podcast playlist and listen
live on the Free iHeart app.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Are The Pickup with Britt Hockley and Laura Burn. Bady
your work, our windows done, That's my world, Risen the
dust only bookab Bugle.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
I've don't much, but yeah I'm not.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
I'll big get and what I want it don't.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Matter where goes.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
This is the Pickup.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
You're listening to the Pickup with Britt Hockey and Laura
Burn and it is.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
It's Brittany's birthday and you can a'll give us sound effects?
Never when do we have to start doing our own
sound effects? Sure, it's my birthday, guys. Thirty two. Thank
you so much everybody.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
I'm easy you mean thirty two for now? Eight?
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Happy thirty second again, Brittany.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
I can't wait for the cupcakes to arrive.
Speaker 3 (01:03):
Would you, guys?
Speaker 1 (01:03):
Yeah, that grace ordered a little bit belated. And I
also have a birthday present for you, but it's in
my car and the reason for that is because it's
too heavy to carry inside.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
It's I really want to treasure chest of money.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
I wish, I wish, I really want to warn you
because it's actually not that heavy. I just can't carry
because I'm too pregnant and I was puffed.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Can I tell you what I think actually happened. I
just think you forgot to get out of your car.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
No, no, no, no long story s.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Another friend who works with us also had a birthday
today and her present was considerably lighter, so I opted
for the lighter one, and then they're heavy one.
Speaker 3 (01:37):
It's two boxes.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
I see you made your choice.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
Yeah, two boxes?
Speaker 2 (01:41):
What could have been part? Like? Have you a marble
statue of statue here?
Speaker 4 (01:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (01:45):
That's why I'm going for a nude of me and
my dog.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
I got it commissioned, custom made. Why you and your
dog both nude together?
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Told me I had to be nude in it? What
give me a hint? Give me one?
Speaker 3 (01:57):
Sorry.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
I really wish we could play all of that back,
and that was a possibility because at no point did
I say that had to be nude.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
That came from you, and that's something that you tell
me in private, So.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Give me.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
It could break a marble statue.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Got wait to find it?
Speaker 2 (02:19):
All right, it is time for Usk on Cut Now.
This is something we do every single week on our podcast.
Life on Cut podcast is where you guys write in
and call up with your problems. We do our best
to answer them, and we have a range of problems
like from the big, the dark, the heavy, to like
the light and funny. Today's one is about a clingy X.
We have Sadie on the line. Sadie, you're having a
(02:40):
problem with your partner's clinging X.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
Is that right?
Speaker 4 (02:43):
That's right. We're having an issue with a snapchat streak
that she doesn't want to let go of.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
So what's just to be clear, what's a snapchat streak?
It's like that you communicate X amount of days in
a row or something.
Speaker 4 (02:54):
Yeah, so when you send a photo to each other
each day, you then get a number. So say you've
got number three, Well, then you've been snapchatting each other
for three.
Speaker 3 (03:02):
Days, gotcha?
Speaker 1 (03:02):
So how many days have they been snapchatting each other for?
And also how long ago did they break up?
Speaker 3 (03:07):
Probably more importantly.
Speaker 4 (03:09):
Two years ago, and this streak was like six hundred
and eighty days.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
Okay, but that doesn't make any sense. Have they been
just doing this the whole time that they've been broken
up they've still been snapchatting? Or is it a case
that they did it in the past, and she's just
kept this streak alive.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
I don't understand how it works.
Speaker 4 (03:23):
I assume they've broken up, not how to streak, and
then restarted it when they kind of became friendly again.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
And this is your current partners and his ex yep,
this is my current partner's ex partner.
Speaker 3 (03:35):
This is so weird. Obviously you can't control what she does.
But have you talked to your boyfriend about it? What
did he say?
Speaker 4 (03:42):
So, we've just moved into our new home. We've moved
out of the home they owned together, and the general
kind of idea was once we move out, house is settled,
where I'm just going to distance myself kind of get
rid of the streak, which he did, and she decided
to restore it, which I had no idea he would do.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
So does that mean that he's also still engaging or
can it be one way?
Speaker 4 (04:02):
So?
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Is she just messaging him and he's not responding or
is he snapping back?
Speaker 4 (04:06):
So he wasn't replying to any the snaps. And when
the streak has died, she's paid to restore the streak.
It's then diet for the second time, and then she's
again restored it again just with him, not like him
not snapschotting her and she just keeps paying to restore.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
It, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (04:22):
It sounds very weird, and obviously she has something going
on that she.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
Maybe hasn't resolved or isn't over. But it doesn't.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
But it does sound like your partner's doing all the
right things. It sounds like he's not engaging, he's not replying,
So there is no way that you're going to be
able to control what she does.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Yeah, but you can control him opening them like he does.
Just because she's sending them doesn't mean he has to
open them and have a look at them and have
that connection.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
I opening them though, or is he just like this
is weird? What's he doing?
Speaker 4 (04:47):
I think he's opening them and then just leaving them.
But then she messaged both of us saying, you know,
wasn't fair, that that wasn't a conversation had that he
wanted to delete the streak and stuff, and.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
That you had me hookline and thinker for his convo.
This is she's she's crazy, she looks crazy. He needs
to block.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
Her partner too, So I'm kind of like, how would
your partner feel about this? Now?
Speaker 2 (05:12):
He needs to just block her, like you can't be
holding onto your past like that, you've sold houses, moved on,
you're moving with new people, like you are so far
moved on. If she's that unhinged that she's messed like,
it's almost embarrassing in childhood, like to message you and
be like, you should have told me if you wanted
to break our snapchat streak. That is the weirdest thing
I've ever heard on the show.
Speaker 4 (05:32):
I'm actually ambage both of us and kind of had
to dig with both of us saying that we're disrespectful
and you know, like I thought we were all friends
kind of thing. And it's kind of like, just leave
us alone, let us move on, like, you know, just
like let us be.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
I find this so confusing. I feel like everyone who's
listening to this now is gonna be like, what, I'm
too old for this. I don't understand it.
Speaker 3 (05:51):
I've never had such Laura.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
Everyone's too old for this. This isn't an age limit thing.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
She feels like, really childish behavior.
Speaker 2 (05:58):
I would be telling him to I mean, this is
up to him and it's on him. He needs to
disengage from her, like by opening them he's encouraging it.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Like whether he's he's seen it one hundred percent.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
She knows that it's a funnel to him, it's still
that that connection in this little, like secret, little tunnel
that she's got to him. It's the last form of
connection he needs to if he respects and values you.
In my opinion, he just needs to end that. Like
he can block her, he can unfriend her, he can
do whatever. But like, just so you know, it's weird.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
It's a control thing on her side of things, I think,
and I'm just like, you need to cut that last, Heather.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
I mean, snapchat you kissing, get a snapchat back of
you guys, like get engaged or something.
Speaker 3 (06:41):
Oh I God, let us know how it goes.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
But I do think it's a pretty clear and easy one.
I do think that your partner has to take a
little bit of responsibility and make.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
It very clear that the streak is no more.
Speaker 4 (06:51):
No more streaks, no more streaks, no more.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
Thanks Sadie, Thanks.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
Laura.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
I stumbled across this study online a couple of days
ago by a psychologist that I follow, Jonathan Hite. He
speaks a lot about kids and anxiety, and I guess
like social media addiction. And he was talking about a
study by an Australian journalist for The Australian. Her name
is Roz Thomas. Now, this is a study where Roz
(07:20):
spent nine months interviewing Australian teenagers on their phone addiction.
I want to read you the opening line to her
report off the back of this nine months, it says,
one week without our phones, we would rather die. Now,
that is a comment by three fifteen year old girls.
And I want to talk about some of the alarming
(07:41):
statistics that she found off the back of this nine months.
She said that not one teenager that she interviewed in
that period said that they weren't addicted to their phone,
and everyone they knew was addicted to their phone. But
the interesting part of this is what she found out
is that they don't want to be so they're hyper
aware enough to know that they have a problem. They
(08:02):
have this lack of attention span. They're saying that they
have high levels of depression and anxiety. They're saying that
they're losing motivation. It's making them lazier. They don't want
to do anything. They want to go outside, but they're saying,
we don't want to feel like that, and I think
that it's a really interesting question about what are we
supposed to do, What are we supposed to be putting
in place, because we live in a world where we
(08:23):
need our phones, Like even kids at school are on
their iPads now, we can't live a life without them.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
Yeah, what was there? What was the age demographic of this?
Just teenagers in general? Yeah, it's very hard in terms
of like the school environments and we've only just started,
like my daughter has only just started school, but using
computers and using screens, maybe not mobile phones, but iPads
and laptops. It's kind of just part and parcel with
education these days. I think the phone part of it though,
(08:50):
and if kids are saying that, we all know everyone's
addicted to their phones, but like there has to be
some parent intervention in that there has to be some
rules around screen time. I don't even think a fifteen
or a fourteen year old should have unvetted like access
to a phone without there being some rules around how
they're using it.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
I think you'd be hard pressed. And I agree the
problem is, like you're hard pressed to find a fifteen
year old that's like okay, every fifteen year old's got
a phone right at this day and age, you need
it just to contact your parents, you need to talk
to your friends. Like, I don't think there's a fifteen
year old out there that doesn't have access to a phone.
You're hard pressed to then find a teenager that's not
going to be able to utilize that phone in another way,
(09:26):
Like just because your mom says, hey, you are not
to use Instagram, tell me a fifteen year old that's
going to listen to that.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
But does a fifteen year old need their phone twenty
four to seven in their room, at their hand and
at their access at all times? Like are they're not
specific times a day? Because I mean, I don't know
what the schools are at these I know there's some
schools that say no phone policy and they actually make
them hand over their phones at the start of the day.
And then there's other schools that have a no phone policy,
(09:52):
but it's like only if you get caught so you
could have it. You know, you're not allowed to have it,
but like it's day in your back, kids will obviously
figure out ways to like, you know, hide it in
their bag.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
And look through whatever they've got to look through.
Speaker 1 (10:02):
Surely, there has to be like some caveats for like
times when they can and can't have their phone, like
coming from school, do you homework, You're not having a
phone for five hours.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
Well, this psychologist went on a bit of a deep dive.
So Jonathan Hyde, who this guy, I said, I follow about.
You know, he studies a lot of their anxious teenagers.
He's really fascinating for anyone that wants to go and
look into him. But he was talking about the best
thing to do is you can't keep it from your
kids forever. But like set the rule. For example, the
number one rule is that your teenager or kid cannot
(10:32):
have the phone in their room. And what that means
unsupervised use of it. Yeah, it's not even just that
it's unsupervised, but all of a sudden when they go
to that room for bed, they can't be up late scrolling.
They can't be like because a big problem is their
lack of sleep. They can't turn off. Some of these
teenagers were saying their anxiety is so high, Like one
girl was saying she wakes up every two hours to
(10:53):
check social media to make sure no one has commented
on something that's mean and nasty and that's so, that's her. Oh,
I just can't fathom it.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
But I mean the other part of this is adults
are addicted to their phones, right, Like we're all addicted
to our phones. So like, if we can't help ourselves,
if we all struggle with that addiction, what chance to
kids have in this equation? You know, Like I don't
I don't know if I want to say that I'm
addicted to my phone in the same way that like,
you know, you could be addicted to other things in life,
but I absolutely have it on me a hell of
(11:23):
a lot of time. And I think that sometimes you
can be like, oh, I'm just doing work or I'm
just doing this. But how many times are you like
just sending an email and all of a sudden you
found yourself scrolling on Instagram. You're like, WHOA, I don't
know how I got here. I don't know why am
I looking at baby goats? Like I wasn't meant to
be here. The thing is is, like everything about your
iPhone and we all know this, it's designed to engage
your attention as long as possible. Kids already have a
(11:46):
short attention span. They're still trying to figure out self control.
They're still learning.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Yeah, And I think if you ask yourself, if you're
trying to work it out, one of the sort of
tests you can do, can you walk into another room
without taking your phone? Because think of how many times
you might go from the lounge room to your bedroom
and you have to find your phone first to take it.
Speaker 1 (12:04):
Like the good thing, No, the good thing about being
super forgetful is that I lose my phone about seven
times day and so I don't know where it is
for most my Like, if I'm at home, I've lost it.
It's somewhere and then I have to get my husband
to come and call it as we can go find it.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
I highly recommend Britt.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
Big exciting things are happening in my household tonight.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
It actually is big and exciting.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
It really, I mean, I'm excited.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
I don't know if anyone else is going to be,
but I'll share it with you anyway. Look, my daughter
as she's six, her name is Marley, and we are
taking her to her very first concert to go and
see Alex Warren, who I mean, you guys will know
the song if you don't know the name. He sings
massive songs like this one, Oh.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Bang, on amazing.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Well, look, Marley is ground zero of like the Alex
Warren obsession in our household. So she came home from
school this one day and she was like, Mommy.
Speaker 3 (12:52):
I heard this song that's gonna play at my wedding.
And I was like, what are you talking about? Red Flag?
Speaker 2 (12:57):
She's five, She was literally five at the time. Are
you like, hang on, who are you married?
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Yeah? No, I know who she's marrying. That love affair
has been going on for a little while. She's had
a boyfriend since kindergarten. Wow, starts young like nothing, It's
like innocent, So we need to.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
Change his break. It's not how young is it? Can
you go to a concert? How young? Can you have
a boyfriend and get married?
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Anyway, he has a song that's called Carry You Home,
and she's obsessed with it.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Right, And he's come to Australia.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
He's actually performing all around and tickets to his concerts
sold out in literally a hot second. I think they're local,
like our local concert. The tickets it's sold out within
ten minutes, so we.
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Were never It's not the big like Olympic stadium.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
He's like smaller ish, I reckon he would have sold
that out anyway. Honestly, it went so quick, but I
really wanted to take Marley, and then we had the
opportunity of interviewing him on the show, so we they
borrowed and stole and I'm able to take her coming.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
I'm only putting you on the radio.
Speaker 3 (13:49):
Give me his tickets, Give my daughter, my six year
old daughter a ticket to go.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
Okay, So this is my question though, Like it's an
all ages concert, right, but it's not. The venue isn't
particularly an all ages venue. Like there's no seats, it's standing.
There'll be a mosh pit, and I'm taking it.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
I don't think Alex Warren has a mosh pit.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
It's it's not like a moshes in like everyone jumping,
but there will be like a lot of people standing.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
Marley's just crowdsurfing.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
Should we light and easy to throw shuck at that child?
Do you think?
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Firstly, do you think six is too young to take
a kid to a concert? And also how old were
you at your first concert?
Speaker 3 (14:23):
And do you even remember my.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
First I think I was like mid twenties. Yes, I
live a sheltered life. Yes I didn't go to a
concert young at all. A lot of Wiggles.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
There's a lot wrong with tonight, Like, only four weeks
five weeks off having a baby, and I'm taking a six.
Speaker 3 (14:37):
Year old to a concert. What's wrong?
Speaker 2 (14:38):
I used to go to the theater as a child.
If that sets the tone for who we were, yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
It really does. My mom plays a lot.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
My mom used to do theater and we used to
go watch her. I think, look, how young is too young?
It depends on the exit. No, it depends on the concept.
For starters, Alex Warren is very innocent, like, he's not
a swearer, He's not rude and crude, He's not not
like he's about love songs. He's got the number one
wedding song in the world right now, you know.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
But I did see him on stage the other day
and he did throw a few f bombs around.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
I think it is going to.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Be slightly less age appropriate than what I might have
thought originally.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
Is it the Wiggles, No, I think the problem is
just like getting her out for the length of the concert.
I almost feel like you're probably better off to let
her hear those songs that she loves, Like you go
for the carry Me Home her wedding song, and you
go for the ordinary, and then her lasting an entire
concert standing up in a wash pit might be too late.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
That we're not staying there for the on call, that's
for sure. But I remember going like so. I remember
my first ever concert. My mum took me and my
sister to Silverchair and how.
Speaker 3 (15:37):
Old I was so little?
Speaker 1 (15:38):
I think I must have been ten, ten or eleven,
except I never actually saw Silverchair.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
We went, it was very exciting. We saw like the warm.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
Up band, and then I fell asleep in her lap
and so she watched Silverchair and I slept.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
In my mum's lap whilst it was on.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
Okay, so you're too young, you're too young. I'm worried
that's going to be like a retake of that. And
I've kind of like I wanted to do this. I
thought that she would really.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Love it, and now that it's here, I'm wondering whether
I really just bit off a bit more than I
can chew.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
I just remembered my first concert. Actually it was Robbie Williams,
and I worked it as security and I wish I
was joking, I wish you were eighteen yep, and our
security me squiggly thing. But it was my only way
to get a ticket to seem so I had to
pretend our security. Sorry, I'm not stopping anyone from getting
into that concert.
Speaker 3 (16:23):
I was like that, it's more so the fact that
you got into going to concerts so late. Now for
Port Macquarie, Oh that's right, No one goes, no one
does anything. Quarry ah, guys like, that's it from us,
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