May 22, 2025 • 17 mins
ASK UNCUT: Erin has found out that her boss is cheating BUT she's also friends with his wife - should she get involved? Laura unpacks what to do when your kid comes home from primary school and has a boyfriend and Britt chats about the odd way her sister was treated when she was pregnant.
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
I heard podcasts, hear more Kiss podcast playlist and listen
live on the Free iHeart APPI with Brittle and Laura
Ben Radio.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
What our windows down?
Speaker 1 (00:26):
My word risen the dust only good fall down.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
I've done much, but yeah I'm not. I'll big get
and what I want.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
It don't matter where does.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
This is the pickup, Hi, guys, it's the pick up
with Britt Hartley and Laura Burn.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
I don't know if this has ever happened to you, Laura.
Speaker 4 (00:44):
I know we've spoken about it maybe once in relation
to garlic. But I have like this new discovery the
last probably two years. But I've only just been the
last two weeks really realized it's something.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
What's going on?
Speaker 4 (00:56):
I cannot eat a mint without sneezing. That is so
weirdly specific because I'm I'm allergic to it, but nothing
else happens.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
I'm not allergic.
Speaker 4 (01:05):
Like all I do is sneeze every time within one
minute of putting minti my mouth. I sneeze also happens
with like listerine, like anything that is minty that goes
in my mouth, I have a sneezing attack after it.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Is that weird, Yeah, chewing er.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
I mean, if it's weird, just look into the light
and have a sneeze.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Nothing like a good sneeze.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
But it's analogy thing that's formed later in life. Why
do they come out of nowhere?
Speaker 2 (01:27):
I really don't know.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
But the one person who does the most impressive sneezes
in this race is produce a grace. No one has
ever heard anyone sneeze like produce a grace.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
I hate sneezing. Actually say I love to sneeze, but
that's not true.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
It's because you do seventeen of them in a row.
I don't need to.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
Try and record you next time, just to play it out.
It's almost like an unbelievable feat.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
It is, but it takes years off my life.
Speaker 4 (01:48):
Every time I do it, I swear, and every time
I'm driving, that's the last time I'm driving.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Because you can't sneeze with your eyes open.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
I think it's actually physiologically impossible to sneeze with their
eyes open. I remember, I'm trying really hard when there's
seventeen in a row, when you're on the highway.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
I remember when I went for my driving my learner's lesson,
and I sneeze twice and the guy in the next
to me who was doing the testing. He made a
joke that if I sneezed again and I had to
keep closing my eyes, he'd have to fail me.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
And I was like, I think he was joking. I
think he was joking. But you can't. Yeah, you're right,
you can't.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
Well, it is Thursday, and you know what that means.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
Dunt Dunton ask uncut.
Speaker 4 (02:25):
This is what we do on our podcast Life Uncut
podcasts every single week.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
One of my favorite things that we do. You guys
writing or.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
Call up with your questions or the biggest problem of
the week. We do our best to answer them. Today
we have Aaron who is in a bit of a
pickle with a relationship she's witnessing at work.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
Erin what's the deats?
Speaker 5 (02:44):
So pretty much my boss I found out that he
was cheating on his wife. But I actually know the
wife and I don't know how to tell her.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
How did you find out that he's cheating?
Speaker 1 (02:56):
Is it someone at work or is it something that
you're like, how do you find that out?
Speaker 4 (03:00):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (03:00):
So I found out through a couple of colleagues. He's
pretty flirty with everyone at work. To be honest, I
just heard through a couple of people, and I'm the
only when that's close to the wife, So I feel
like I need to tell her.
Speaker 4 (03:12):
This is where you run a risk because it's well,
it sounds like you're also not one hundred percent. It
sounds like like it's through the grapevine, like you've seen
it yourself, but like such and such a set that
they think or I mean, I could be wrong, but
the fact that your boss firstly is a huge thing.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
There's a power and balance there. I'm sure you don't
want to get involved in it.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
But secondly, I think unless you are one hundred percent sure,
I don't think you can bring it up.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Well do you think are you one hundred percent sure?
Speaker 5 (03:39):
Well, I've seen the Tinder profile, so I know you
know there's some bit of evidence there.
Speaker 4 (03:45):
But yeah, yeah, well I think you can say that
for sure. I think you don't have to say hey,
he's cheating. I think you can just say, hey, I
feel really uncomfortable doing this, but you should know this
could be fake, could be a catfish. But I have
seen Brett on Tinder.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
You're gonna call your boss's wife and say, hey.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
Friend, she knows her well it's still it's.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Still I don't know.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
Okay, Wait, firstly, I guess, like, in terms of the
workplace that you work at, is this a job that
you like would be devastated to lose, or are you
now in a situation where you're like, do you know what,
I could leave this job and get something else that's
of equal you know, value and everything else.
Speaker 5 (04:23):
I mean, I love my job. I don't want to
lose it, That's the thing, you know. And like, I'm
also love my boss and I don't want to cause
any drama and if he found out, I definitely lose
my job.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
How close are you to his wife?
Speaker 5 (04:35):
I'd say we're pretty close. Like we've gone out to
lunch a couple of times together.
Speaker 3 (04:39):
Maybe just put your hand in the sand.
Speaker 5 (04:40):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
It's so like and I know that this is so
polarizing and like cheating is Honestly, anytime we answer any
questions around cheating, it's like the one thing that gets people.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Absolutely rage baited.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
I worry that you're putting yourself in the firing line
of something that's going to blow up for you in
your workplace when you've not done anything wrong.
Speaker 4 (05:00):
It's different if you find out like that it's a
friend's husband, that's one thing, But when your friend's husband
is also in charge of your life life and your.
Speaker 2 (05:09):
Career, that's such a big responsibility.
Speaker 3 (05:11):
I think it gets too messy.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
The only thing you could somehow anonymously do maybe print
it out and leave it on a desk or something.
Speaker 3 (05:17):
Don't say who is wrong so.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
I can't get traced back to you.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
But if you feel like.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
You really need if you're close enough to her and
you're and you think she really needs to know, you
just have to weigh up where it comes from, because
if it does fall back onto you at the end
of the day, like, is that situation worth.
Speaker 3 (05:32):
Losing your job over?
Speaker 1 (05:33):
Would you if this was you, would you ever speak
to your boss about it directly rather than going to
the wife firsts.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
Once your boss knows, there's just you can't move on
from that.
Speaker 4 (05:44):
You never forget it. There will always be in balance
and your head will be on there.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
Chap.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
Yeah, but he also probably should know that everyone knows.
If everyone's talking.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
About it, why should we protect him. He should know
the everyone knows.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
Stuff that I don't know.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
Honestly, I actually don't feel like we've beat Eddie help
at all because I think if I was in this situation, I.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
Don't think I would get involved, and I don't I know.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
That that is not how everyone would respond to this,
but I just worry about the drama it brings into
your life.
Speaker 5 (06:07):
If this was me, I would want to know.
Speaker 4 (06:09):
So I think in that case, then she needs to
know what you know without knowing it's you that know that.
How are you going to do that? How would you,
as I said, print it out the Tinder profile, put
it on a desk, make it anonymous, bring it to attention,
write an anonymous note.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
Hey, I don't want to get involved, but I have
seen your part of your husband on Tinder.
Speaker 4 (06:26):
I don't want to get involved for my own personal reasons,
but I think it's important you know, do with it
what you will. I'm not saying that's the right way
to go about it, but there are definitely ways to
let somebody know without getting involved.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
The only thing I've always said in relation to these,
if you're going to be.
Speaker 4 (06:39):
That person that anonymously brings to attention that someone's partner
is cheating, it can't just be a statement i've seen
your partner cheating. There has to be evidence attached to it.
Otherwise you send them into a bit of a spiral
on like.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
Not knowing is it real? Is a fake? It makes
it worse.
Speaker 4 (06:54):
If you're going to go down that track, you have
to give her enough evidence or reason to believe that
whoever you are, the vigilante that you are, she actually
has some basis to it. Eron.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (07:04):
I mean, this is an impossibly hard thing feed to navigate.
My worry is that there's no arm to care with that.
You just drop a bomb on someone's life and then
you don't have to deal with any of the emotional
flow on from it.
Speaker 4 (07:14):
Yeah, but it's not a choice because of that. The
choice is because she doesn't want to lose a job.
She's in a tricky between a rock and a hard place.
It's it's probably the worst place to be. But I
don't know.
Speaker 3 (07:22):
Let us know what you do, though.
Speaker 5 (07:24):
I will, I definitely will. I'm thinking to leave a
letter on her car. Maybe I'm not the car.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
Not the car. I don't know. I don't.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Go see to a therapist.
Speaker 3 (07:35):
We're not qualified, don't I know? My advice was brilliant.
Take mine. Let me know how you go.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
Thanks Eron, definitely give us call back and let us
know how it goes.
Speaker 5 (07:44):
I will. Thanks. Guys.
Speaker 1 (07:47):
How old were you when you had your first big crush?
Speaker 4 (07:50):
I was probably one of the first kids to have
like a proper boyfriend in primary school and I think
I was ND five Indie six, which is like ten.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
What does a proper boyfriend look like?
Speaker 1 (08:02):
When you're Oh my god, I never thought does that
even mean?
Speaker 3 (08:06):
Listened to this, I was traumatized.
Speaker 4 (08:08):
I was school captain and like sort of like the
cool kid, I guess, but I was really a nerd inside,
and I'll never forget I didn't actually really want a boyfriend,
but the whole year made this big deal to meet
behind the Demoudables after school one day and they formed
a big circle around us, and I had to kiss
my boyfriend on the lips for the first time, and
it was just a peck, and I remember not wanting
to do it, but I felt like I had to.
(08:30):
Then they all circled us and they were going kiss kiss.
I'm traumatized thinking back to it.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
That was my first experience.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
I feel like this sounds like like the most classic
version of like a little childhood experience, like we didn't
have the demoundables, we had the wet weathershed no, how
no play everyone we went if it rained?
Speaker 2 (08:47):
How was the wet weather?
Speaker 1 (08:48):
Shehed?
Speaker 2 (08:48):
But no, it's same thing.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Like I don't ever remember having a boyfriend in school
because I was not cool, But I do remember being
like deeply infatuated in love with several boys. It would
change like every six months. It'd be like Julian Lorenzo Nelson,
someone or other.
Speaker 4 (09:00):
I remember his name was Chadh Chad.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
That's a naughty boy name.
Speaker 3 (09:04):
He had long hair too down to his shoulders to.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Set the boy, wasn't he ye Chad. Well, the reason
why I'm talking about this is like my kids are young.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Marley's just started school, she's in kindergarten, and I thought
we had a little bit more time up our sleeve
before the boyfriend girlfriend Chad would start.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
But it is.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
No, No, they have started so young. I don't think
they meet anything by it. Like I think it's very innocent.
I think it's kind of a kin to playing like
mums and Dad's role play, you know, like.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Well, we don't want to play that too.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
Six we know how that is up?
Speaker 1 (09:35):
Well, this is how I got into this problem exactly. No,
but I think it's more like a kind of a
role play, like they see romantic things on TV, or
they see you know, princes and princesses and everything else.
Speaker 3 (09:44):
We have crushes, that's normal.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
But Marley has a boyfriend, and a lot of the
kids in school and in kindergarten have boyfriends or girlfriends
that they talk about, and the school has had to
bring in a band, like the classes brought in a
band where the kids are no longer allowed to talk
about boyfriends and girlfriends.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
At all because it was a boyfriend's name.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
No, I can't do that to her. That Chad, It's
not Chad Chicken. The poor kid doesn't even probably know
he's a boyfrien.
Speaker 3 (10:08):
Do they hold hands? Like, what's the equivalent?
Speaker 4 (10:11):
Is it just like you're the boy that I would
pick if I wanted to, Like, they don't even talk.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
I don't know. I think they do chat, but I
don't think.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
It's anything more like I think they're five years old,
Like it's very innocent.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
I guess at five you still know to like hold
hands and stuff. Like, I don't know. I'm not a parent, but.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
It surprises me because recently, Mally, we were off, like,
you know, she was off with her other friends and
she's got other little boys with similar age that she's
friends with, and they're off in the corner having a chat.
And he was chatting about his girlfriend at school. So
it's not just my kid's school.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
No, It's like no.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
But I mean, like, it seems like kindergarten is not
such a young or obscure age for kids to start
talking about having a quote unquote boyfriend or girlfriend.
Speaker 3 (10:51):
That's weird to me.
Speaker 4 (10:51):
I'm sorry, it's your first year of school. You're like
just out of diapers. Some kids are still in diapers.
Speaker 2 (10:59):
Kids in school.
Speaker 3 (11:00):
Yeah, some kids are late to the party line.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
They're not going to school, and there's very few kids
are going to schools.
Speaker 3 (11:05):
But those undies, the thick undies.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
But Britt, I'm not sure what is the best way
to navigate around it, because I guess my thing is
is I don't want to make a big deal about it,
because I do feel like with kids, the bigger deal
you make about something, the more they latch onto it
because it becomes special.
Speaker 3 (11:18):
You also don't want to shame them for like having
a boyfriend.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Or girlfriend and I don't want to embarrass them either,
but I also kind of want to have what seems
like an age appropriate conversation for a five year old
because to me, I don't remember being five and having
any sort of romantic feelings for anyone. I don't even
think I knew what a boy was versus anything different,
whereas I do think it's changed. Maybe it's got to
do with like all the TV shows now and the
(11:42):
beautiful movies and whatnot that really romanticize it.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
But I don't know what's changed.
Speaker 4 (11:47):
You probably don't realize because it's all around us, but
it's everywhere for a kid, even like a.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Taylor Swift film video clip, like you.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Said, Taylor Swift, like Travis Kelce. Oh, it's a bit
of a problem.
Speaker 4 (12:00):
There, TK, I mean TC, I don't know, I don't know,
like calling whatever. But my point is I think it's
more prevalent than you think, and maybe we don't notice
it because it's normal for us, but a five year
old notices those things. And also it's like if you
look up to someone like Taylor Swift, then you see
a video clip of her in kissing a boy or
holding hands or like her love story or whatever, then
(12:21):
that's your normal, you know, So I don't know how
you navigate it. I guess she just continue to ask
how it's going, No, how's it going?
Speaker 2 (12:27):
How's chat? You see chat school lately?
Speaker 4 (12:30):
Like you just want to create that environment where they
feel like they can tell you anything.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Yeah, I definitely agree with that.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
Well, look, I mean, goodluck to any parents who are
going through the same thing at the moment.
Speaker 4 (12:40):
A woman named Frankie, she's a TikToker thirty five thousand followers.
Speaker 3 (12:44):
She posts a lot.
Speaker 4 (12:45):
She's heavily pregnant, and she's posted a video that's gone
bonkers started a pretty heated debate online. She recently was
on a train that was absolutely packed to the brim,
like people sitting everywhere, people standing in the middle of
the train, and she herself was standing.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
In this video, she's sort of filmed.
Speaker 4 (13:02):
Herself standing up, heavily pregnant, filmed around, shown everyone sitting down,
and she just said chivalry for pregnant women doesn't exist anymore.
I still can't believe not one person even offered, as
in even offered to stand up so she could sit down.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Which the ridiculous thing about this is like usually on trains,
there's usually a separate part of seats which are for
people who are have you no poor mobility or needs
assistance or whatever, like, there's seats there that people know
to get up from.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
Yeah, And I think about when I grew up, it
was always taught if I was ever in a position
like that, that you would always stand up and offer
your seat to elderly, somebody disadvantaged or pregnant women like
that was just what I learned as a child, and
I thought that was a really standard thing. But some
of the comments in this TikTok are so disgusting. I
want to read you a few Why is your pregnancy
(13:50):
anyone else's issue? Why is your pregnancy my problem? I
hate this societal expectation. I mean, it was your choice
to get pregnant, not theirs. Hey, you wanted a quality,
you got equality, y'all.
Speaker 3 (14:01):
They're American. I'm sorry I really went into that, y'all.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
What is with that I'm a mother, I'm more important
than you. You bowed down to me. Attitude and things
like I don't care that you're pregnant. I care that
I've had a long day, my back end, feet hurt,
blah blah, blah like this is just the theme that
was on this TikTok, and I was actually disgusting, you
know what.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Look I mean, I had something happen to me when
I had Lola. She was only little and she was
in the car. It was Christmas time. We were going
into the shopping center. And you know how like in
Big Westfields they always have like the pram sections.
Speaker 3 (14:32):
So but that's not even Big Westfields.
Speaker 4 (14:34):
Every shopping center now, even the little ones have like
parking with prams.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
Yes, so it's parking prams.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
It's just an area where you can, you know, easy
duck in if you're a mom. Anyway, it was Christmas time,
it was hell busy, and I had already had my indicator,
and I was waiting to go into this parking spot which.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Was right in the prams.
Speaker 1 (14:50):
And as I was waiting to go into the parking spot,
someone else had pulled up, so they kind of blocked
me from going in, which meant that this woman took
advantage of it, and she's snuck in and took my space.
Didn't have a kid, took my space, and I wound
down my window and I was like, dude, come on,
I've got a baby in the car. She's been screaming
for twenty minutes. We've been driving around this car park,
and she yelled out the window, it's your choice.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
You decided to have kids.
Speaker 4 (15:13):
That grinds my gears, Like I would have been absolutely furious.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Oh I did. I was like, I wish your mother
didn't have any kids. And then I was like, oh
my god, I need to stop.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
This happened to my sister recently. So I was over
visiting my fiance in Italy a couple of weeks ago,
and my sister was overseas as well.
Speaker 4 (15:31):
She's got a at the time, like six month old baby,
and my sister was on the train, had to travel
two and a half hours to where we were. The
train was packed like Sardine's right, And so Cherry's standing
up holding this baby because there's no room to put
her in a pram.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
For two and a half hours. Fine, not fine, well no,
but Sherry, that's what Sherry said. Write her words.
Speaker 4 (15:51):
She's like, fine, I get it. Did I choose to
have a baby. Yeah, I'm happy to stand up. I'm
not gonna ask anyone to sit down.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Whatever.
Speaker 4 (15:57):
But then she had to breastfeed. No one moved. No
one offered. I've seen the pictures. She's sitting on the
ground in a corner with all these men standing over
a bit, not for any other reason than it's sardine's
it's just packed standing over a while she's trying to
breastfeed a baby and protect it from being like bumped
by luggage and bumped by people, and she's like people
were looking at me on the ground in my situation,
(16:20):
and not one person offered, And I found that's so
sad and shows like I didn't want them to give
up my seat for the rest of the trip. I'd
obviously been standing for an hour. I just wanted somewhere
safe to breastfeed for ten minutes. Then I would have
gotten back up. But everyone just looked out a blatantly
nine and looked away. And I thought, what kind of
a world have we living in where there is not
one person on that train that would see someone in
a more vulnerable position and offer to help.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
I think that that's a really, really, such a shitty
example of people being selfish, really, I mean, And also
we can sit here and be like, yes, of course
someone decides to have kids.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
Guess what someone decided to have you.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
Totally at the end of the way your mom to
be able to sit down.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
Your mum was pregnant once upon a time too. I
don't know.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
I read these reactions and apart from that woman who
yelled at me in a car park one time, it
was Christmas and she was just full of holidays here,
I feel like most people are good people. Like I've
not had experiences where people haven't been helpful. I've had
loads of experiences where I couldn't get a pram up
the stairs and someone stop and help me carry the
pram or carry things because I had too much. Like
I would say, overwhelmingly, my experiences have been good, and
(17:22):
so it's really sad to me to hear it, specifically
Sherry who's a new mum who experienced something like that,
because that's just really shit.
Speaker 3 (17:29):
Well, I think that's the difference, right.
Speaker 4 (17:31):
They're the quick little things that not really inconvenient to anyone.
But people have this really weird attachment to their seats
when it involves giving up.
Speaker 3 (17:38):
A seat for something.
Speaker 4 (17:39):
But you guys, remember, if you're listening right now, a
woman carrying babies like they're running a marathon every single day,
So throw them a bone, give them a seat, all right.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Well, look that's it from us guys.
I heard podcasts, hear more Kiss podcast playlist and listen
live on the Free iHeart APPI with Brittle and Laura
Ben Radio.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
What our windows down?
Speaker 1 (00:26):
My word risen the dust only good fall down.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
I've done much, but yeah I'm not. I'll big get
and what I want.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
It don't matter where does.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
This is the pickup, Hi, guys, it's the pick up
with Britt Hartley and Laura Burn.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
I don't know if this has ever happened to you, Laura.
Speaker 4 (00:44):
I know we've spoken about it maybe once in relation
to garlic. But I have like this new discovery the
last probably two years. But I've only just been the
last two weeks really realized it's something.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
What's going on?
Speaker 4 (00:56):
I cannot eat a mint without sneezing. That is so
weirdly specific because I'm I'm allergic to it, but nothing
else happens.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
I'm not allergic.
Speaker 4 (01:05):
Like all I do is sneeze every time within one
minute of putting minti my mouth. I sneeze also happens
with like listerine, like anything that is minty that goes
in my mouth, I have a sneezing attack after it.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Is that weird, Yeah, chewing er.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
I mean, if it's weird, just look into the light
and have a sneeze.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Nothing like a good sneeze.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
But it's analogy thing that's formed later in life. Why
do they come out of nowhere?
Speaker 2 (01:27):
I really don't know.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
But the one person who does the most impressive sneezes
in this race is produce a grace. No one has
ever heard anyone sneeze like produce a grace.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
I hate sneezing. Actually say I love to sneeze, but
that's not true.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
It's because you do seventeen of them in a row.
I don't need to.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
Try and record you next time, just to play it out.
It's almost like an unbelievable feat.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
It is, but it takes years off my life.
Speaker 4 (01:48):
Every time I do it, I swear, and every time
I'm driving, that's the last time I'm driving.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Because you can't sneeze with your eyes open.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
I think it's actually physiologically impossible to sneeze with their
eyes open. I remember, I'm trying really hard when there's
seventeen in a row, when you're on the highway.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
I remember when I went for my driving my learner's lesson,
and I sneeze twice and the guy in the next
to me who was doing the testing. He made a
joke that if I sneezed again and I had to
keep closing my eyes, he'd have to fail me.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
And I was like, I think he was joking. I
think he was joking. But you can't. Yeah, you're right,
you can't.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
Well, it is Thursday, and you know what that means.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
Dunt Dunton ask uncut.
Speaker 4 (02:25):
This is what we do on our podcast Life Uncut
podcasts every single week.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
One of my favorite things that we do. You guys
writing or.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
Call up with your questions or the biggest problem of
the week. We do our best to answer them. Today
we have Aaron who is in a bit of a
pickle with a relationship she's witnessing at work.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
Erin what's the deats?
Speaker 5 (02:44):
So pretty much my boss I found out that he
was cheating on his wife. But I actually know the
wife and I don't know how to tell her.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
How did you find out that he's cheating?
Speaker 1 (02:56):
Is it someone at work or is it something that
you're like, how do you find that out?
Speaker 4 (03:00):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (03:00):
So I found out through a couple of colleagues. He's
pretty flirty with everyone at work. To be honest, I
just heard through a couple of people, and I'm the
only when that's close to the wife, So I feel
like I need to tell her.
Speaker 4 (03:12):
This is where you run a risk because it's well,
it sounds like you're also not one hundred percent. It
sounds like like it's through the grapevine, like you've seen
it yourself, but like such and such a set that
they think or I mean, I could be wrong, but
the fact that your boss firstly is a huge thing.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
There's a power and balance there. I'm sure you don't
want to get involved in it.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
But secondly, I think unless you are one hundred percent sure,
I don't think you can bring it up.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Well do you think are you one hundred percent sure?
Speaker 5 (03:39):
Well, I've seen the Tinder profile, so I know you
know there's some bit of evidence there.
Speaker 4 (03:45):
But yeah, yeah, well I think you can say that
for sure. I think you don't have to say hey,
he's cheating. I think you can just say, hey, I
feel really uncomfortable doing this, but you should know this
could be fake, could be a catfish. But I have
seen Brett on Tinder.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
You're gonna call your boss's wife and say, hey.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
Friend, she knows her well it's still it's.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Still I don't know.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
Okay, Wait, firstly, I guess, like, in terms of the
workplace that you work at, is this a job that
you like would be devastated to lose, or are you
now in a situation where you're like, do you know what,
I could leave this job and get something else that's
of equal you know, value and everything else.
Speaker 5 (04:23):
I mean, I love my job. I don't want to
lose it, That's the thing, you know. And like, I'm
also love my boss and I don't want to cause
any drama and if he found out, I definitely lose
my job.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
How close are you to his wife?
Speaker 5 (04:35):
I'd say we're pretty close. Like we've gone out to
lunch a couple of times together.
Speaker 3 (04:39):
Maybe just put your hand in the sand.
Speaker 5 (04:40):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
It's so like and I know that this is so
polarizing and like cheating is Honestly, anytime we answer any
questions around cheating, it's like the one thing that gets people.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Absolutely rage baited.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
I worry that you're putting yourself in the firing line
of something that's going to blow up for you in
your workplace when you've not done anything wrong.
Speaker 4 (05:00):
It's different if you find out like that it's a
friend's husband, that's one thing, But when your friend's husband
is also in charge of your life life and your.
Speaker 2 (05:09):
Career, that's such a big responsibility.
Speaker 3 (05:11):
I think it gets too messy.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
The only thing you could somehow anonymously do maybe print
it out and leave it on a desk or something.
Speaker 3 (05:17):
Don't say who is wrong so.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
I can't get traced back to you.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
But if you feel like.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
You really need if you're close enough to her and
you're and you think she really needs to know, you
just have to weigh up where it comes from, because
if it does fall back onto you at the end
of the day, like, is that situation worth.
Speaker 3 (05:32):
Losing your job over?
Speaker 1 (05:33):
Would you if this was you, would you ever speak
to your boss about it directly rather than going to
the wife firsts.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
Once your boss knows, there's just you can't move on
from that.
Speaker 4 (05:44):
You never forget it. There will always be in balance
and your head will be on there.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
Chap.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
Yeah, but he also probably should know that everyone knows.
If everyone's talking.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
About it, why should we protect him. He should know
the everyone knows.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
Stuff that I don't know.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
Honestly, I actually don't feel like we've beat Eddie help
at all because I think if I was in this situation, I.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
Don't think I would get involved, and I don't I know.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
That that is not how everyone would respond to this,
but I just worry about the drama it brings into
your life.
Speaker 5 (06:07):
If this was me, I would want to know.
Speaker 4 (06:09):
So I think in that case, then she needs to
know what you know without knowing it's you that know that.
How are you going to do that? How would you,
as I said, print it out the Tinder profile, put
it on a desk, make it anonymous, bring it to attention,
write an anonymous note.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
Hey, I don't want to get involved, but I have
seen your part of your husband on Tinder.
Speaker 4 (06:26):
I don't want to get involved for my own personal reasons,
but I think it's important you know, do with it
what you will. I'm not saying that's the right way
to go about it, but there are definitely ways to
let somebody know without getting involved.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
The only thing I've always said in relation to these,
if you're going to be.
Speaker 4 (06:39):
That person that anonymously brings to attention that someone's partner
is cheating, it can't just be a statement i've seen
your partner cheating. There has to be evidence attached to it.
Otherwise you send them into a bit of a spiral
on like.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
Not knowing is it real? Is a fake? It makes
it worse.
Speaker 4 (06:54):
If you're going to go down that track, you have
to give her enough evidence or reason to believe that
whoever you are, the vigilante that you are, she actually
has some basis to it. Eron.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (07:04):
I mean, this is an impossibly hard thing feed to navigate.
My worry is that there's no arm to care with that.
You just drop a bomb on someone's life and then
you don't have to deal with any of the emotional
flow on from it.
Speaker 4 (07:14):
Yeah, but it's not a choice because of that. The
choice is because she doesn't want to lose a job.
She's in a tricky between a rock and a hard place.
It's it's probably the worst place to be. But I
don't know.
Speaker 3 (07:22):
Let us know what you do, though.
Speaker 5 (07:24):
I will, I definitely will. I'm thinking to leave a
letter on her car. Maybe I'm not the car.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
Not the car. I don't know. I don't.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Go see to a therapist.
Speaker 3 (07:35):
We're not qualified, don't I know? My advice was brilliant.
Take mine. Let me know how you go.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
Thanks Eron, definitely give us call back and let us
know how it goes.
Speaker 5 (07:44):
I will. Thanks. Guys.
Speaker 1 (07:47):
How old were you when you had your first big crush?
Speaker 4 (07:50):
I was probably one of the first kids to have
like a proper boyfriend in primary school and I think
I was ND five Indie six, which is like ten.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
What does a proper boyfriend look like?
Speaker 1 (08:02):
When you're Oh my god, I never thought does that
even mean?
Speaker 3 (08:06):
Listened to this, I was traumatized.
Speaker 4 (08:08):
I was school captain and like sort of like the
cool kid, I guess, but I was really a nerd inside,
and I'll never forget I didn't actually really want a boyfriend,
but the whole year made this big deal to meet
behind the Demoudables after school one day and they formed
a big circle around us, and I had to kiss
my boyfriend on the lips for the first time, and
it was just a peck, and I remember not wanting
to do it, but I felt like I had to.
(08:30):
Then they all circled us and they were going kiss kiss.
I'm traumatized thinking back to it.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
That was my first experience.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
I feel like this sounds like like the most classic
version of like a little childhood experience, like we didn't
have the demoundables, we had the wet weathershed no, how
no play everyone we went if it rained?
Speaker 2 (08:47):
How was the wet weather?
Speaker 1 (08:48):
Shehed?
Speaker 2 (08:48):
But no, it's same thing.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Like I don't ever remember having a boyfriend in school
because I was not cool, But I do remember being
like deeply infatuated in love with several boys. It would
change like every six months. It'd be like Julian Lorenzo Nelson,
someone or other.
Speaker 4 (09:00):
I remember his name was Chadh Chad.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
That's a naughty boy name.
Speaker 3 (09:04):
He had long hair too down to his shoulders to.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Set the boy, wasn't he ye Chad. Well, the reason
why I'm talking about this is like my kids are young.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Marley's just started school, she's in kindergarten, and I thought
we had a little bit more time up our sleeve
before the boyfriend girlfriend Chad would start.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
But it is.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
No, No, they have started so young. I don't think
they meet anything by it. Like I think it's very innocent.
I think it's kind of a kin to playing like
mums and Dad's role play, you know, like.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Well, we don't want to play that too.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
Six we know how that is up?
Speaker 1 (09:35):
Well, this is how I got into this problem exactly. No,
but I think it's more like a kind of a
role play, like they see romantic things on TV, or
they see you know, princes and princesses and everything else.
Speaker 3 (09:44):
We have crushes, that's normal.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
But Marley has a boyfriend, and a lot of the
kids in school and in kindergarten have boyfriends or girlfriends
that they talk about, and the school has had to
bring in a band, like the classes brought in a
band where the kids are no longer allowed to talk
about boyfriends and girlfriends.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
At all because it was a boyfriend's name.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
No, I can't do that to her. That Chad, It's
not Chad Chicken. The poor kid doesn't even probably know
he's a boyfrien.
Speaker 3 (10:08):
Do they hold hands? Like, what's the equivalent?
Speaker 4 (10:11):
Is it just like you're the boy that I would
pick if I wanted to, Like, they don't even talk.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
I don't know. I think they do chat, but I
don't think.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
It's anything more like I think they're five years old,
Like it's very innocent.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
I guess at five you still know to like hold
hands and stuff. Like, I don't know. I'm not a parent, but.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
It surprises me because recently, Mally, we were off, like,
you know, she was off with her other friends and
she's got other little boys with similar age that she's
friends with, and they're off in the corner having a chat.
And he was chatting about his girlfriend at school. So
it's not just my kid's school.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
No, It's like no.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
But I mean, like, it seems like kindergarten is not
such a young or obscure age for kids to start
talking about having a quote unquote boyfriend or girlfriend.
Speaker 3 (10:51):
That's weird to me.
Speaker 4 (10:51):
I'm sorry, it's your first year of school. You're like
just out of diapers. Some kids are still in diapers.
Speaker 2 (10:59):
Kids in school.
Speaker 3 (11:00):
Yeah, some kids are late to the party line.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
They're not going to school, and there's very few kids
are going to schools.
Speaker 3 (11:05):
But those undies, the thick undies.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
But Britt, I'm not sure what is the best way
to navigate around it, because I guess my thing is
is I don't want to make a big deal about it,
because I do feel like with kids, the bigger deal
you make about something, the more they latch onto it
because it becomes special.
Speaker 3 (11:18):
You also don't want to shame them for like having
a boyfriend.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Or girlfriend and I don't want to embarrass them either,
but I also kind of want to have what seems
like an age appropriate conversation for a five year old
because to me, I don't remember being five and having
any sort of romantic feelings for anyone. I don't even
think I knew what a boy was versus anything different,
whereas I do think it's changed. Maybe it's got to
do with like all the TV shows now and the
(11:42):
beautiful movies and whatnot that really romanticize it.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
But I don't know what's changed.
Speaker 4 (11:47):
You probably don't realize because it's all around us, but
it's everywhere for a kid, even like a.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Taylor Swift film video clip, like you.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Said, Taylor Swift, like Travis Kelce. Oh, it's a bit
of a problem.
Speaker 4 (12:00):
There, TK, I mean TC, I don't know, I don't know,
like calling whatever. But my point is I think it's
more prevalent than you think, and maybe we don't notice
it because it's normal for us, but a five year
old notices those things. And also it's like if you
look up to someone like Taylor Swift, then you see
a video clip of her in kissing a boy or
holding hands or like her love story or whatever, then
(12:21):
that's your normal, you know, So I don't know how
you navigate it. I guess she just continue to ask
how it's going, No, how's it going?
Speaker 2 (12:27):
How's chat? You see chat school lately?
Speaker 4 (12:30):
Like you just want to create that environment where they
feel like they can tell you anything.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Yeah, I definitely agree with that.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
Well, look, I mean, goodluck to any parents who are
going through the same thing at the moment.
Speaker 4 (12:40):
A woman named Frankie, she's a TikToker thirty five thousand followers.
Speaker 3 (12:44):
She posts a lot.
Speaker 4 (12:45):
She's heavily pregnant, and she's posted a video that's gone
bonkers started a pretty heated debate online. She recently was
on a train that was absolutely packed to the brim,
like people sitting everywhere, people standing in the middle of
the train, and she herself was standing.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
In this video, she's sort of filmed.
Speaker 4 (13:02):
Herself standing up, heavily pregnant, filmed around, shown everyone sitting down,
and she just said chivalry for pregnant women doesn't exist anymore.
I still can't believe not one person even offered, as
in even offered to stand up so she could sit down.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Which the ridiculous thing about this is like usually on trains,
there's usually a separate part of seats which are for
people who are have you no poor mobility or needs
assistance or whatever, like, there's seats there that people know
to get up from.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
Yeah, And I think about when I grew up, it
was always taught if I was ever in a position
like that, that you would always stand up and offer
your seat to elderly, somebody disadvantaged or pregnant women like
that was just what I learned as a child, and
I thought that was a really standard thing. But some
of the comments in this TikTok are so disgusting. I
want to read you a few Why is your pregnancy
(13:50):
anyone else's issue? Why is your pregnancy my problem? I
hate this societal expectation. I mean, it was your choice
to get pregnant, not theirs. Hey, you wanted a quality,
you got equality, y'all.
Speaker 3 (14:01):
They're American. I'm sorry I really went into that, y'all.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
What is with that I'm a mother, I'm more important
than you. You bowed down to me. Attitude and things
like I don't care that you're pregnant. I care that
I've had a long day, my back end, feet hurt,
blah blah, blah like this is just the theme that
was on this TikTok, and I was actually disgusting, you
know what.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Look I mean, I had something happen to me when
I had Lola. She was only little and she was
in the car. It was Christmas time. We were going
into the shopping center. And you know how like in
Big Westfields they always have like the pram sections.
Speaker 3 (14:32):
So but that's not even Big Westfields.
Speaker 4 (14:34):
Every shopping center now, even the little ones have like
parking with prams.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
Yes, so it's parking prams.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
It's just an area where you can, you know, easy
duck in if you're a mom. Anyway, it was Christmas time,
it was hell busy, and I had already had my indicator,
and I was waiting to go into this parking spot which.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Was right in the prams.
Speaker 1 (14:50):
And as I was waiting to go into the parking spot,
someone else had pulled up, so they kind of blocked
me from going in, which meant that this woman took
advantage of it, and she's snuck in and took my space.
Didn't have a kid, took my space, and I wound
down my window and I was like, dude, come on,
I've got a baby in the car. She's been screaming
for twenty minutes. We've been driving around this car park,
and she yelled out the window, it's your choice.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
You decided to have kids.
Speaker 4 (15:13):
That grinds my gears, Like I would have been absolutely furious.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Oh I did. I was like, I wish your mother
didn't have any kids. And then I was like, oh
my god, I need to stop.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
This happened to my sister recently. So I was over
visiting my fiance in Italy a couple of weeks ago,
and my sister was overseas as well.
Speaker 4 (15:31):
She's got a at the time, like six month old baby,
and my sister was on the train, had to travel
two and a half hours to where we were. The
train was packed like Sardine's right, And so Cherry's standing
up holding this baby because there's no room to put
her in a pram.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
For two and a half hours. Fine, not fine, well no,
but Sherry, that's what Sherry said. Write her words.
Speaker 4 (15:51):
She's like, fine, I get it. Did I choose to
have a baby. Yeah, I'm happy to stand up. I'm
not gonna ask anyone to sit down.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Whatever.
Speaker 4 (15:57):
But then she had to breastfeed. No one moved. No
one offered. I've seen the pictures. She's sitting on the
ground in a corner with all these men standing over
a bit, not for any other reason than it's sardine's
it's just packed standing over a while she's trying to
breastfeed a baby and protect it from being like bumped
by luggage and bumped by people, and she's like people
were looking at me on the ground in my situation,
(16:20):
and not one person offered, And I found that's so
sad and shows like I didn't want them to give
up my seat for the rest of the trip. I'd
obviously been standing for an hour. I just wanted somewhere
safe to breastfeed for ten minutes. Then I would have
gotten back up. But everyone just looked out a blatantly
nine and looked away. And I thought, what kind of
a world have we living in where there is not
one person on that train that would see someone in
a more vulnerable position and offer to help.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
I think that that's a really, really, such a shitty
example of people being selfish, really, I mean, And also
we can sit here and be like, yes, of course
someone decides to have kids.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
Guess what someone decided to have you.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
Totally at the end of the way your mom to
be able to sit down.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
Your mum was pregnant once upon a time too. I
don't know.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
I read these reactions and apart from that woman who
yelled at me in a car park one time, it
was Christmas and she was just full of holidays here,
I feel like most people are good people. Like I've
not had experiences where people haven't been helpful. I've had
loads of experiences where I couldn't get a pram up
the stairs and someone stop and help me carry the
pram or carry things because I had too much. Like
I would say, overwhelmingly, my experiences have been good, and
(17:22):
so it's really sad to me to hear it, specifically
Sherry who's a new mum who experienced something like that,
because that's just really shit.
Speaker 3 (17:29):
Well, I think that's the difference, right.
Speaker 4 (17:31):
They're the quick little things that not really inconvenient to anyone.
But people have this really weird attachment to their seats
when it involves giving up.
Speaker 3 (17:38):
A seat for something.
Speaker 4 (17:39):
But you guys, remember, if you're listening right now, a
woman carrying babies like they're running a marathon every single day,
So throw them a bone, give them a seat, all right.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Well, look that's it from us guys.
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