September 15, 2025 • 44 mins
Trigger warning: traumatic birth, emergency cesarean, placenta previa, placenta haemorrhage, special care nursery (incase you are pregnant and have birth fear).
Sometimes life gives you the exact opposite of what you planned. This is the story of Lacey’s birth -raw, emotional, and nothing like I had imagined. I hope by sharing my experience, it reminds you that you’re not alone in the hard seasons, and that even in the moments that break us open, there can be so much beauty.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I would like to acknowledge the traditional owners of the
land on which this episode is being recorded, the Combomb
Merry people. They've been having conversations and telling stories on
this land for thousands of years, and we show our
gratitude and respect for their contribution to our environment and culture.
(00:21):
This is Rise and Conquer, the podcast where we strive
to become the highest version of ourselves through curious conversations,
healthy mindsets, laughter, connection, and a deep desire to evolve.
I'm your host, Georgie Stevenson.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Join me as we explore parenthood, business, manifestation, and so
much more. It's positive, it's practical, and it's about putting
you in the driver's seat of your own life. Are
you ready? Hello, my love, Welcome back to the podcast.
(01:02):
It is so good to be back in your ears
in real time. I am doing an episode. I've come
out of maternity leave for a quick minute to tell
you guys about me and Lacey's birth story. And as
I'm recording this podcast, I've got Jamie here holding Lacey.
(01:23):
I can see her. I've got breast milk over my top,
and I'm also the baby brain is so real, Like
I've just been very scattered, and I have trouble finding
words for things. It's so real, so bear with me.
But I cannot wait to tell you guys about our
(01:47):
birth story, our birth experience, because it was wild. It
was a bit full on, but beautiful and so many
beautiful lessons, so many beautiful takeaways, and yeah, let's just
get straight into it. So if you guys haven't listened
(02:07):
to the podcast where I explained my high risk pregnancy,
I would recommend going to that first, and I'll link
it in the show notes. I won't link it, someone
else will link it in the show notes. And basically
that just explains a bit more about I had a condition,
(02:29):
like cliff notes is, I had a condition called placenta
previa where my placenta was sitting over my cervix. So
the baby comes through the cervix, so if your placenter
is there, you know the baby can't pass through. And
it's actually quite detrimental because if you've gone too spontaneous labor,
the cervix opens up and if the placenta is sitting
(02:51):
on top, it basically pulls the placenter and can like
abrupt it and can tear it. And if that happens.
I remember reading you know this, you shouldn't do this,
but I was googling facts and like, if that happens,
the baby only has a forty percent chance of living.
So it's it's a very serious condition and it's cast
(03:14):
as a high risk pregnancy. There is grades, so there's
like the placenta being not over, but it's a few
centimeters up. You still have to get a C section.
Mine was Grade four, which means it was completely over,
you know, the most high risk grade. And I kept
thinking throughout the pregnancy it would come up. It didn't.
(03:37):
I accepted the fact I was going to have a
C section that was booked in, and then also because
of the high risk factor of it, my doctor wanted
me to come in from thirty five weeks on bed rest.
I was very hesitant of that because of Ivy leaving her,
knowing that it would be two weeks you know, before
(03:57):
I get the C section in thirty seven weeks and
then also another week in hospital with the baby. But
of course, you know, you do what you got to do.
So I was like, Okay, I'll go on to bedrost.
At thirty five weeks, I had finished maternity leave, a
bit earlier, and because of this condition, we really were prepared.
(04:20):
So we had baby girls, you know, room done, we
had the house done, I was on maternity leave. Everything
was wrapped up at work. So that was a blessing
because you know, we were really really prepared. And so
the doctor had told me worst case scenario with this
condition of I would have to have a C section,
(04:41):
but also I'd have to go under so be under
general like general aesthetics, not aesthetics anesthetics. Yeah, general anesthetic,
which means you know, you can't even like receive your baby,
and that would obviously be worst case scenario. But then
he also said a big factor with placenta previa is
(05:02):
pre bleeding, and if you bleed, it could mean that
you're in spontaneous labor or you know, something's happening with
the placenta and they have to do emergency sea sections.
So that's why I was going on bed rest because
there's a time window with this condition condition too, and
(05:23):
he basically said, like if you're bleeding for let's say
over an hour, it's very detrimental to the baby. The
way he described it, Because my doctor's awesome, I see
doctor Moffrey at Pindara private and you know he's got
gray hair, and he was like, your condition is the
reason I have gray hair. And I remember laughing and
(05:46):
just thinking, oh yeah, you know, he's got to tell
me all the risks. He has to tell me everything,
but it won't happen to us. I'll go on on
bed rest. I'll have the sea section. And you know,
I had already start I putting a playlist together for
the sea section. I had listened to some podcasts about
really positive sea sections. I had done the Rise Meditation.
(06:11):
We have a beautiful sea section birth meditation on the
Rise app. I was doing that and so I felt
really good. I felt really calm, I felt really excited,
and so I was slowing down for work. And it
was Friday, the eleventh of July, and I had my
last beauty appointments booked in. So because I knew it
(06:32):
was going on bed rest, you know, I booked in
my hair, nails, lashes, especially being postpartum. I just remember
with Ivy, I didn't do anything like that. And then I,
you know, wanted to get some of those appointments done postpartum.
And it's like very hard because you have a new
book and you can't, basically, So I was very onto
my appointments. That was kind of like the blessing of
(06:53):
having a specific date going into hospital. And so this
day it was I had my last appointments, and then
I just wanted a week with Tim and Ivy and
we were going to do a whole bunch of fun things.
And so I got my nails done, I got my
lashes done, and then I got home, me and Ivy
(07:14):
did some baking. Tim went to golf, and me and
Ivy played on the playground and you know, watched TV.
And it's funny because she was playing on the playground
and the sun was setting, and I just remember looking
at the sunset. You know, this is in the afternoon,
and I was just feeling so grateful, like all euphouri
(07:37):
R vibes, Like I remember thinking, oh my god, I
am obsessed with this home. I cannot believe we're in
our dream home. I cannot believe, you know, we found
this house, we moved in it. How good it feels,
how grounded I feel. I cannot believe how obsessed I
am with Tim and Ivy. I love being pregnant. I'm
(07:59):
so ready for a newborn, Like I was I'm talking
like ten out of ten grateful on the scale of
high vibration, I was, you know, one hundred and in
saying that that's not unusual for me. So I was
just like going with it, and I was like, you
know what a vibe. This is beautiful. And then Tim
got home from golf, we got takeout, we watched a movie,
(08:22):
still feeling really really good, and then we went to bed.
When we went to bed, I remember crying to Tim
and I was just quite upset about having to go
on bed rest leaving Ivy because since becoming pregnant, I know, scientifically,
you release a specific hormone that does make you know,
like the love you release, you were releasing more oxytocin
(08:45):
and like all those sorts of things, and so you
will find your toddlers if you have one ah more
clingy towards you. And so since being pregnant and slowing down,
my relationship with Ivy had really changed and evolved and
it was so sweet and beautiful and I was just
loving it so much. So I was having this like
(09:05):
physical reaction to going on to bed rest and away
from her, because you know, I put her to bed
every night. We cuddle, we read books, and you know,
I feel like I don't have to explain that. But
I was crying to Tim and I was like, I
don't want to go on beddress. I don't want to
go away from you guys. And he's like, it's fine,
We'll come up and see you every day. Like it's okay.
(09:26):
You just have to do what's best for you know
this baby, we already knew what we're gonna call it,
so you know, He's like, you just got to do
what's best for Lacey. And I was like, I know,
and but I was like, I was very emotional. Tim
then went to our sleep and I also took half
a sleeping tablet a restative, which is okay to take
(09:47):
when you're pregnant, do want to say that, but just half.
And this was something that I had done because I
was having really bad insomnia towards the end, to the
point where I would go to sleep, I'd wake up
at like eleven twelve or one am and I would
not get back to sleep, and then it was just
wrecking me the whole next day. And so I took
(10:10):
it half a sleeping tablet. Sometimes i'd take a quarter,
sometimes a half and that just helps me relax. And
I was finding too, I was, you know, peeing multiple
times a night because I was heavily pregnant, and taking
that I could get up to peek go straight back
to sleep, and so that's just something I was doing
that my doctor had helped me with. And so I
(10:32):
took you know, half a tablet of my sleeping tablet.
I was going to go to sleep, but then I
was like, it's Friday night and I'm gonna scroll on TikTok.
And it's funny because I don't really allow myself to
scroll during the week because I know sometimes then my
sleep is really bad. So I was like, no, I'm
going to treat myself. It's Friday night scrolling on TikTok,
and the algorithm was more, you know, like funny videos.
(10:56):
So I remember laughing, and I remember being like, oh shit,
I think I've weed myself, which is not uncommon when
you're pregnant, and so I was like, oh, I think
I've weed myself. And then even I didn't even get
up then, like I kind of just like stayed scrolling
for a little bit longer because I was watching something funny.
(11:16):
And then I was like oh no, I think I've
really weed myself. And so I got up, and when
I got up, I could feel, you know, like it
was like very wet down there, and I was like,
oh my god, surely I haven't like actually weed my weed,
like fully weed, like not just you know a little bit.
And I put my hand down there and put it up,
(11:37):
and you know, it was completely dark because Tim was asleep,
and I could see that there was something on my hand.
So I quickly went and turned the light on, looked
into the mirror, and my pajama pants were just soaking
in blood. And so I quickly went to the toilet
and pulled down my pants and there was blood clots.
And for a moment, I just kind of it's like
(12:00):
I just was like stuck in time, and it took
a moment to be like, holy shit, this is happening.
Something's not right. Obviously, something's not right. And I knew
I was only thirty four weeks. And it's funny because
I actually had a doctor's appointment the day before and
he was like, she's thirty four weeks, you know, only
(12:21):
a couple more weeks, and you know, she's fully cooked.
At the moment her lungs are still underdeveloped. That happens
next week, and so I kind of just remember him
being like, she's basically you know, she's not fully cooked.
And I remember being like, oh my god, no, she
can't come out. She's too small, she's too young. And anyway,
(12:42):
so I had that thought in that micro moment, I
quickly woke up t him and turned on the light
and just stood there and he obviously saw my pajama
pants and his face just went fully white. And I
remember the look on his face and he just goes,
I'm getting eyes. Get like, get the keys, like, get
in the car. We need to go to the hospital.
(13:04):
Pull doctor mofree. And so he went and got Ivy
from bed. She was obviously sleeping, and I called my
doctor and I said, I'm bleeding. And he's like how
much because previously he said literally, if you have a
couple of drops, come into emergency, like that's how serious
(13:24):
the bleeding is with this condition. And so he's like,
how much you're bleeding. I'm like, no, I'm breeding. I'm
bleeding a lot. It's not good. And I'm like, I
my pajama pants are so it's like I need to
get a towel, and he was like getting like shit
is saying this, but he was like, Georgia, it is
so important that you get in the car and you
(13:46):
get here as soon as possible, like stay calm, I'm
going to meet you there, like don't grab anything, like
get in the car right now and leave. And I
could just feel the seriousness, you know, the emergency in
his voice, and I just was like, oh my god,
I can't believe this is happening, Like this can't be happening.
(14:10):
And so Tim got Ivy. We got in the car
and me and Tim were kind of just silent the
whole time. We just explained to Ivy, you know, mommy
is bleeding. We need to go to the hospital. You know,
baby sister might be coming out. We're very transparent with her.
And I called Tim's mum because they were on the coast,
(14:31):
and I just said, I'm bleeding really heavily. We're going
to the hospital. I need you to come and get
Ivy and she was like, yep, of course, we'll see
you guys soon. And then I called back and then
doctor Moffrey called me and he's like, how close are you?
I'm like five minutes away. He's like, all right, I'm here.
I'm waiting, come around the side, come straight to an
emergency like, don't park, you need we need to get
(14:52):
you straight in. And then he said, I think we're
having baby girl tonight. And I just like, I just
I had such a mix mix emotions because I was like, Okay, good,
she needs to come out, because obviously what's happening inside
is you know, not good. I'm bleeding. But then also
I just was like, oh my god, she's so small,
(15:14):
she's so tiny, she's undeveloped, her lungs are developed. And
so I just remember on the car ride there just
holding my stomach and I could feel her moving, so
that like I didn't feel completely scared for her life
because I could kind of feel her moving inside, so
I didn't feel like she had stopped moving. But I
(15:35):
just remember holding my stomach and being like, you have
to be okay, like just stay strong, you have to
be okay, and was just kind of talking to her
that I said to her, you might be coming out tonight,
but you have to be okay. Daddy's going to be
with you. And then so yeah, then we got to hospital.
(15:55):
My doctor was literally there. He like opened the car door.
He got me out, Tim got IVR and we went
straight in. We went into a birth suite and did
there was like a whole bunch of nurses rushed in.
He did an examination. He wanted to put I don't
really know what it's called, but he wanted to put
(16:16):
basically like something inside that stopped you bleeding. And he
put it in and it fell straight out, and he
was like, oh my god. We didn't say he didn't say,
oh my god, but he was like, Georgia, you're already
in spontaneous labor. We have to we have to get
her out right now. Because again, like I said at
(16:38):
the start, if you go into spontaneous labor instantly, baby
girl is on a time limit where it's you know,
very detrimental for her. So he said that, and I
was like, oh my god. And they he yelled out
to the nurses and he's like, we need to get her,
you know, to the O R, you know whatever it's called,
(17:01):
straight away. She needs to come out right now. That
all the nurses rushed in. They were you know, asking
me questions, they were putting things on me. They put
me on the stretcher, they took my clothes off, and
then we were like leaving towards the or and I
hadn't seen Tim and Ivy, and I was like, wait,
like I have to say about it him and Ivy
and they were in the waiting room or something. So
(17:21):
then they came and I just said to Tim like,
don't stay with me. Make sure you like go with
Lacey when she's born, like wherever she is, don't worry
about me. And then you know, gave Ivy a big
kiss and cuddle and just said, you know, mummy's going
to go have baby sister and we'll see you soon.
(17:44):
And she was really sleepy and stuff, so she didn't
really understand the situation. So then they wheeled me through
ther like through the hospital to the o R. Again.
I just remember there was like ten or so people
in the room, a lot of people asking questions. I
remember also thinking because I had just had dinner at
(18:04):
seven pm and it was nine pm, and I remember
thinking like, how can I go under you know, under
like I've just had food. And they made me drink
this like certain solution that helps like dissolve things in
your stomach. And then my doctor said, now I know
that you know you wanted to receive her, but you've
(18:25):
lost too much blood and it's too dangerous for both
of you. You will have to, you know, be completely under.
And at that moment I just kind of was in
that surrendered state of just like you do whatever you
need to do to get her safe. I think I
even said that to him, and I was like, yeah,
(18:46):
it's fine, just you know, get her out kind of thing.
So it was very full on and then I was
even awake when they put the catheter in, like they
didn't really have enough time to do it all in
the proper way and so put the kaff it in.
I had quite a few canulas in my arms, and
also we had some machines in there if I lost
(19:09):
too much blood. And then the last thing I remember
is obviously just you know, having that thing on your
mouth and getting put under. And when he told me
she was going to come out tonight, like back when
we were in the birth suite, I remember my whole
body just started shaking. It's like I think before, because
(19:32):
I had had the sleeping tablet, I was quite relaxed
considering the situation and the amount of blood, and I
was just like talking to her, I felt quite relaxed.
I was breathing, and then when he was like, she's
not okay, you're in spontaneous labor. We need her get
her out right now, I just oh, and I'm getting
(19:53):
shivers saying it to you guys, but like I just
started shaking. And that's when I started really freaking out,
being like, oh my god, like what about if I
wake up and she's not okay or you know, you
always go to the worst case scenario, So that was
really really scary, really full on. But then they put
(20:15):
me under. That's the last thing I remember. I woke
up in the recovery room and straight away the nurse goes,
she's fine, she's healthy, her lungs are underdeveloped, so she
(20:37):
did need to go in on oxygen. Sorry, and in
they call it in like an iso neet capsule thing
where the baby needs to go in and have oxygen.
So she's like, she's fine, your husband's with her, and
I just was like, oh, Like obviously, instant relief felt
(20:57):
so much better. And then I stayed in recovery just
probably only like ten minutes, and then they wheeled me
up to see her in the special care nursery and
she was so small. Oh my gosh, she was tiny.
So she was born at two point two kilos and
then they lose a bit, so she ended up losing
and weighing just two kilos. So if you think of
(21:20):
how small two kilos is, it's yeah, she was so tiny.
And so the first time I saw her, she was,
you know, hooked up to all the machines, she had
like a oxygen mask on, she had a canula in
and obviously it was very full on to see her
like that, and then I had just had emergency surgery,
(21:44):
and yeah, it was very full on. It was very emotional.
So we saw her, we stayed with her for a bit,
and at this point, you know, it's like eleven twelve pm,
so the timeline was I noticed how it was bleeding,
probably twenty to nine, and then we got to the
hospital at nine and then she was born at nine
(22:08):
twenty two, so very very quick, you know. And it's
it's funny because you know, a couple of people have asked, like,
you know, how does Tim you know, feel about this experience,
And obviously he was very you know, scared, and it
was very forlorn. But the way he describes it is
(22:29):
it was such a short amount of time from like
you know, eight forty to her being born at nine twenty.
He kind of was in shock, but didn't You don't
have a lot of time to sit in the worrying
and that sort of thing. So that's kind of a
blessing because it was all just so far so from
(22:50):
the time that I started bleeding, I was like, holy shit,
I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know,
you know, how she is, till only you know, an
hour later knowing she's okay. That side of things is
that was a blessing rather than you know, not knowing
for longer, but very full on, very traumatic. And then
(23:12):
after that we got willed back to the room, so
she stayed in special care nursery. They had a feeding
tube for her, and we got back to the room
and I couldn't really sleep that night. I really struggled.
I don't know if it was like the drugs from surgery,
but I was like off and on. And they also
come and check you every two hours, so they check
(23:35):
your incision, they check your blood pressure and everything like that.
And then Tim slept and then the next day woke
up in order to go and see her. I had
to have a shower and get out of bed. So
I did that, And can we just talk about the
C section recovery because I'm just gonna be really honest
(23:57):
with you guys. It was pretty fucked up. I don't know.
I think i'd spoken to I have a couple of
girlfriends who had had a sea section, and they were like,
it's not that bad, you know, the recovery is really fine. No,
it was so full on, like the pain was quite excruciating.
(24:18):
And look, I'm sorry if you knew you're booked in
for a sea section, and I'm not trying to scare
anyone or like, I'm just telling you my experience, but
the recovery was so full on. I've had a vaginal
birth with Ivy and then having a sea section, and honestly,
I would opt for the vaginal birth any day of
(24:38):
the week, and that I was in labor for you know,
twenty hours. But it's just I was so painful and
I couldn't like stand up straight, and I just like, oh,
I don't know if it made a difference because it
was an emergency, but yeah, the recovery was not well
and I had to take quite a few pain meds
(24:59):
to just like feel okay, and then you know, when
you're in pain meds, you never feel like yourself. So
the next couple of days after that were really full
on because we couldn't actually hold Lacey for three days,
and that's because her oxygen levels kept dipping, and so
she had to stay in this like it's called an
(25:22):
isolate where it's she's got like oxygen through her, you know,
like an oxygen mask, but then also oxygen in this
like tank sort of thing where she was in. And
then the peeds doctor just explained that you know, if
you take her out to hold her, it could dip
and it can just really affect then her recovery. So
(25:44):
obviously again we're going to listen to the doctors and
but that was very full on and very emotional time.
You can imagine going through emergency c section at just
thirty four weeks and then not receiving your baby when
they first come out, and then not being able to
hold her for three days. Yeah, it was very very difficult,
(26:07):
very emotional. I was crying pretty much the whole time,
and Tim was amazing though, he really held me emotionally
and physically through that time, and really, yeah, I think
I felt this too with Ivy's birth, but I feel
(26:27):
like since Lacey was born, like our relationship it again
has gotten stronger because of what you go through, you know,
together and how he showed up for you know, me
and Lacey during that time. It's really really special. So yeah,
the next couple of days were just kind of a
blur out. Lacey was getting fed through a tube and
then kind of like the next sort of season that
(26:50):
you not sorry, the next kind of thing is Lacey
had to stay in the special care nursery. I was
you know, after a c section, you stay in hospital
for five days, and so what that kind of looked
like was once I could hold her, I was going
(27:10):
up to hold her, you know, as much as possible,
but it was usually on you twice a day, just
because again we didn't want her oxygen to dip. And
then I was pumping, so my milk came in after
day three, and before that I was just expressing clossroom
and I was actually getting a lot, and with Ivy
I didn't get a lot, so I was like really
loving that factor. So we were feeding her classroom. She
(27:34):
was also getting fed through the tube, and because she
was a PREMI they actually have a program in the
hospital where they have donated breast milk, so through the tube,
she was getting breast milk, you know, from someone else
the first three days, and then my milk came in
out day three and then I was pumping every three hours,
(27:54):
and I was very grateful that my supply was really good,
and yeah, my milk was My supply was good. So
she then was feeding off my breast milk from then,
and I honestly think my supply was really good this
time because if you think of a newborn's mouth, you know,
they can only suck so much and then they get
(28:16):
tired and they stop, whereas I was pumping every three
hours for twenty minutes, and so I think just like
the constant pumping just really brought my milk in sooner.
But obviously you're not supposed to pump. You're supposed to
let the newborn do it. But Lacey wasn't breastfeeding. So
then the week that I was in hospital, yeah, just
(28:38):
going back and forth, you know, seeing her pumping, and honestly,
that was probably the hardest time because you know, I
was in hospital recovering from birth, without a baby in
my room and going back and forth saw from the
(29:01):
c section, very emotional. All the hormones is wild, and yeah,
I've honestly never cried so much my life. And yeah,
it was like really really dramatic, if I'm being honest.
And the hospital was great though. The nurses were great,
The hospital was great. The actual director of the maternity
(29:22):
unit ended up coming to see me, and I just
remember breaking down, you know, hysterically crying to her after
day five, being like I can't leave the hospital, like
I can't leave without her. It just like in my body,
it just like I just couldn't, Like I just I
felt so physically unwell that I was supposed to leave
(29:44):
the hospital without my baby. And they were really good.
They let me stay another couple of nights because I
think they could see my mental health was not well,
and so I stayed another couple of nights, and during
those times too, I could start breastfeeding Lacey. So I
started doing a couple of they call them nuzzles, so
(30:05):
nuzzling her, just putting on herd the boob, and then
she was getting fed by the tube after and then
it was time to leave the hospital, which was honestly
one of the hardest days because it was hard because
obviously I had to leave her in the hospital, but
like I knew she was getting taken care of by
(30:26):
the special care nurses. But then also I wanted to
go home and see Ivy. And I felt really bad
for Ivy because you know, she did come up and
see us at the hospital, but like I said, I just,
you know, I just you know, really wanted to see
how I really need to spend time with her, But
then I wanted to be at the hospital of Lacey.
(30:48):
So it was just really hard because I felt like
my heart was like breaking into so I wanted to
be at the hospital, but then I wanted to be
home with Ivy, and so I really didn't know how
it was going to feel. But then I left the
hospital and it was actually it actually was better because
during the hospital, you know, being in this room, just
(31:11):
the hospital environment can be like a bit depressing, let's say.
And so I got home, I got into my own bed,
I unpacked, my parents were there. They stayed with us
for a couple of weeks, so my parents were there.
It was really good to see them. And then I
would go and visit Lacy in the hospital twice a day.
So even though I didn't want to leave the hospital,
(31:33):
once I did, I was kind of glad because I
got some normalcyat at home and just like being in
your own house, your own clothes, your own bed is
like so much nicer. But then I would go up
and visit Lacey, So I'm glad when I got home.
But then, like before, I didn't want to leave the hospital.
It was really really hard. So yeah, then I got
(31:54):
home and then it was probably about two weeks of
going up and down to the hospital. So basically how
it would look was because the criteria for Lacey to
come out of special care nursery was she needed to
be putting on weight and she needed to be having
all suck feeds, So you know, she feeds every three
(32:17):
hours and at the start, she's getting fed through the tube.
And because premes are so tiny, if they're sucking on
a bottle or breast, it exhausts them and they can
like start to lose weight and not put on weight.
So the hospital kind of make you do it in
a very slow way where it starts with one breastfeed
(32:38):
a day and then you go to two breastfeeds a day,
but it has to be like six hours in between,
and then you go to three, but it has to
be like every second breastfeed, and it's like all this criteria.
So I feel like once I left the hospital, I
was kind of in survival mode of just getting Lacey
home and so like whatever the doctor said I could do,
(33:02):
Like if it was okay, you can go to two breastfeeds,
you know, I was just doing whatever I could do
and obviously trying to be there as much as possible.
And so what it would look like is I'd wake
up at five thirty after pumping every three hours overnight,
wake up at five thirty. We'd get to the hospital
at six am, do the first feed. We'd stay, we'd stay,
(33:25):
maybe get a coffee or something, and then do the
next feed, go home for lunchtime, and then come back
and stay till you know, six or seven pm. And
we kind of did that, yeah, for two weeks straight,
and the hospital, like when I asked the nurses at
the start when she was, you know, thirty four weeks
(33:48):
in hostel, I said, you know, what's the kind of
time limit of her coming home? And everyone said, look,
probably not till she's thirty nine weeks like term that's
generally where they come home. And so I was like,
you know, that's like a month in hospital, a month
going back and forth. And I even remember when they
(34:09):
said it, I'd like thought on my head, I was like, no,
she's going to come home sooner. So I was like
very determined on getting her home and doing whatever was necessary.
And we were very lucky because she was she was
such a good feeder and she got on the breast
straight away, she'd wake up for all her feeds, like
(34:31):
she was just she was doing really, really well. So
she ended up coming home when she was just thirty
six and a half weeks, which all the nurses and
the hospital were like really surprised that she could like
get to that point. And I was just so happy
and so relieved. And I feel like, you know, from
that thirty four weeks, from the emergency C section to
(34:53):
the thirty six, you know, thirty seven, I was just
in survival mode and I couldn't like I couldn't like
talk to anyone on the phone. I couldn't like be
in the outside world. It was very like I was
in this bubble and I just was like doing what
was necessary to get Lacey home and you know, be
with Ivy and recover. And then yeah, then once Lacey
(35:16):
came home, Oh, it just was like instant relief. And
that's when you know, I felt like I could like
start her POSTPARTU, my postparter because it just like also
was very odd because you know, you're trying to recover
from a C section and you're going, you're you know,
(35:38):
getting up and down, you're driving. I personally wasn't driving,
was getting driven, but like the whole you're not really
recovering and you're in survival mode. So it really wasn't
until Lacey was home that I felt relief and was like,
oh my god, I can actually just like be and
oh she came home and it was just like the best,
(35:58):
Like I cannot even explain to you the feeling of
when she came home and we were a family. It
was just so special. And my parents they stayed one
more week just to make sure, you know, we were
sorted with Lacey, and then they left and it was
just you know, meetim and Ivy and Lacey and it
was just so special. Yeah, I just can't even explain
(36:23):
that period. Then for a good, like month after, I
just just would hold her, look at her and just
be so obsessed. And then yeah, since then, Honestly, she
is such a beautiful baby. She has such an amazing temperament.
(36:44):
I don't know, I think everyone has said it's well
deserved after the birth and everything we went through postpartum,
but it was just so incredible to get her home
and then she just fed and she slept, and obviously
she's a newborn, you know, she cries, she cluster feeds
(37:04):
and all the things. But I cannot tell you how
just in love with her and the newborn bubble and
postpartum I am. Even though it was a very full on,
you know, birth experience and everything that happened, I just
(37:25):
feel so grateful. I just feel so happy. I honestly,
I feel like I'm about to cry just thinking of
how happy I am that she's here and she's okay
and we're together, and I don't know, she's just perfect.
She's an actual angel baby. And I know this is normal,
(37:47):
but I just like sit and look at her all day.
I just breastfeed her, look at her, and I'm just obsessed.
And it's crazy because when I got pregnant I really
was intentional about scripting exactly what I'm telling you and
being like, I remember writing in my journal. Actually, let
(38:10):
me see if I can find because I often put
things in my notes as my journal, and let me
actually read out a journal piece for you. Okay, So
this is a journal piece I wrote from June twenty ninth. Yeah,
(38:31):
June twenty ninth. So it's like what twelve days before
I gave birth? So I just wrote, you know, I'm
so grateful I get to rest before I get to
rest from home before our C section birth. I love
spending so much time with Ivy Girl and feeling so
rested and calm blah blah blah, and so I say,
(38:54):
the first moments of seeing baby Girl is like nothing
I've ever experienced. It is pure magic. We are so
well rested. Baby girl is so calm, love snuggles and
is so easy. She latches straight away, easily, finding feeding
natural and normal. I feel so calm and at peace.
(39:17):
My recovery is easier than I expected. I feel so healthy,
so full of energy, and so ready for the newborn nights.
The newborn knights are easy too. I notice her cues,
I pick up on them and she's so settled and
feeds easily and sleeps so well. We are so grateful.
(39:38):
I feel so amazing in my body and in my mind,
and in this new season, I've never been happier. So
that's what I wrote in my notes, and I can
truly say that's how I feel despite everything happening with
the birth. And again, you guys know, everything only has
(39:59):
a meaning if you put on that like, put that
meaning onto it. So even though quote unquote my birth
you know, could be called traumatic and you could label
it a whole host of things, I really just don't
feel that way. Like it was full on and it
really required a new level of growth and resilience and
(40:24):
capacity from me, but it honestly was like the most
incredible thing because not only did it birth Lacey, who
was just I just yeah, obviously obsessed, so in love,
but it birthed and new me and I feel so different.
I feel so much more me. I don't know if
(40:46):
that's even if I'm articulating things right, but I just
feel so much more me. And the way I can
explain it is, I'm like it was perfect. It was
all meant to go that way. We were meant to
go through that because how I feel right now is
so connected to Lacey, so connected to myself, so at peace.
(41:09):
I feel so safe in my body. I feel like
I just have this deep knowing that everything, like everything
that has happened up until now, was bringing us to
this point. And I just feel I don't know, I
just feel pure bliss. I feel pure happiness. I feel
(41:31):
so content. It's just right. And I hope I'm articulating
that well. But yeah, so that is the wild story. Again,
this is just my experience. And like I said, despite
like if someone you know is probably hearing this, probably thinking,
(41:53):
holy shit, that's wild. It was, but also, yeah, it
was so perfect for us. And now you know, I
am about two months postpartum. We're finding our croove, she's
sleeping really well, we're just feeding on demand. We're getting
a couple of long stretches at night. And it's funny.
(42:13):
I was telling Jamie this morning, I, you know, wore
my whoop when I was pregnant, and I just want
to say to my pregnant mammas, like, newborn tired is
not as bad as pregnancy tired. When I was pregnant
and wearing my whoop, I literally could not get out
of the orange or red because it will give you, like,
(42:34):
you know, green. If you're in the green, you're good
to go, and then it goes down to orange and
then red and red obviously means like do nothing today
because you're exhausted. And when I was pregnant with Lacey,
I was always in the orange and red despite having
like an eight nine hour sleep. Obviously the insomnia wasn't helping.
But like I'm waking up, you know, probably twice a
(42:59):
night at the moment, with her being eight weeks on
a rare occasion just once, but mostly twice a night,
and I'm still in the green. And I think it's
just because recovery is going so much. Recovery is going
really well with the C section. I am really onto
(43:19):
all my supplements. If you haven't listened to the postpartum
Glow Up episode where I talk about what I'm doing postpartum,
I actually recorded that when I was pregnant, but I
had a plan in place. I'm doing everything in that
plan in regards to the supplements I'm taking, the water
I'm drinking and everything like that. And yeah, newborn tired,
(43:42):
not as bad like I wake up twice a night,
and the wake ups are about forty five minutes to
an hour. That's how long it takes to feed her.
And honestly like, fine, Obviously I have my days and
I can get a bit agitated and whatnot, but honestly fine.
And so if you're pregnant and you're like, oh my god,
especially if you have a toddline and you're like, I
(44:02):
don't know how I'm going to do this, trust me
when I say newborn tired is not as bad as
pregnancy tired. So yes, despite everything, I am feeling so good,
so happy, and just really loving this current season. Thank
you so much for listening to this episode of the
Rise and Conquer podcast. If you enjoyed it and want more,
(44:25):
connect with us via Instagram or continue the conversation on
our beautiful Facebook community page. All the details are in
the show notes, and I'd love to hear more about
your journey. Also, we're an independent podcast with a small
but mighty team, so we really do appreciate your support.
If you have a spare moment, please click the follow
(44:45):
or subscribe button to the podcast, and if you leave
a review, you'll help other people find our content, and
we would be so grateful
I would like to acknowledge the traditional owners of the
land on which this episode is being recorded, the Combomb
Merry people. They've been having conversations and telling stories on
this land for thousands of years, and we show our
gratitude and respect for their contribution to our environment and culture.
(00:21):
This is Rise and Conquer, the podcast where we strive
to become the highest version of ourselves through curious conversations,
healthy mindsets, laughter, connection, and a deep desire to evolve.
I'm your host, Georgie Stevenson.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Join me as we explore parenthood, business, manifestation, and so
much more. It's positive, it's practical, and it's about putting
you in the driver's seat of your own life. Are
you ready? Hello, my love, Welcome back to the podcast.
(01:02):
It is so good to be back in your ears
in real time. I am doing an episode. I've come
out of maternity leave for a quick minute to tell
you guys about me and Lacey's birth story. And as
I'm recording this podcast, I've got Jamie here holding Lacey.
(01:23):
I can see her. I've got breast milk over my top,
and I'm also the baby brain is so real, Like
I've just been very scattered, and I have trouble finding
words for things. It's so real, so bear with me.
But I cannot wait to tell you guys about our
(01:47):
birth story, our birth experience, because it was wild. It
was a bit full on, but beautiful and so many
beautiful lessons, so many beautiful takeaways, and yeah, let's just
get straight into it. So if you guys haven't listened
(02:07):
to the podcast where I explained my high risk pregnancy,
I would recommend going to that first, and I'll link
it in the show notes. I won't link it, someone
else will link it in the show notes. And basically
that just explains a bit more about I had a condition,
(02:29):
like cliff notes is, I had a condition called placenta
previa where my placenta was sitting over my cervix. So
the baby comes through the cervix, so if your placenter
is there, you know the baby can't pass through. And
it's actually quite detrimental because if you've gone too spontaneous labor,
the cervix opens up and if the placenta is sitting
(02:51):
on top, it basically pulls the placenter and can like
abrupt it and can tear it. And if that happens.
I remember reading you know this, you shouldn't do this,
but I was googling facts and like, if that happens,
the baby only has a forty percent chance of living.
So it's it's a very serious condition and it's cast
(03:14):
as a high risk pregnancy. There is grades, so there's
like the placenta being not over, but it's a few
centimeters up. You still have to get a C section.
Mine was Grade four, which means it was completely over,
you know, the most high risk grade. And I kept
thinking throughout the pregnancy it would come up. It didn't.
(03:37):
I accepted the fact I was going to have a
C section that was booked in, and then also because
of the high risk factor of it, my doctor wanted
me to come in from thirty five weeks on bed rest.
I was very hesitant of that because of Ivy leaving her,
knowing that it would be two weeks you know, before
(03:57):
I get the C section in thirty seven weeks and
then also another week in hospital with the baby. But
of course, you know, you do what you got to do.
So I was like, Okay, I'll go on to bedrost.
At thirty five weeks, I had finished maternity leave, a
bit earlier, and because of this condition, we really were prepared.
(04:20):
So we had baby girls, you know, room done, we
had the house done, I was on maternity leave. Everything
was wrapped up at work. So that was a blessing
because you know, we were really really prepared. And so
the doctor had told me worst case scenario with this
condition of I would have to have a C section,
(04:41):
but also I'd have to go under so be under
general like general aesthetics, not aesthetics anesthetics. Yeah, general anesthetic,
which means you know, you can't even like receive your baby,
and that would obviously be worst case scenario. But then
he also said a big factor with placenta previa is
(05:02):
pre bleeding, and if you bleed, it could mean that
you're in spontaneous labor or you know, something's happening with
the placenta and they have to do emergency sea sections.
So that's why I was going on bed rest because
there's a time window with this condition condition too, and
(05:23):
he basically said, like if you're bleeding for let's say
over an hour, it's very detrimental to the baby. The
way he described it, Because my doctor's awesome, I see
doctor Moffrey at Pindara private and you know he's got
gray hair, and he was like, your condition is the
reason I have gray hair. And I remember laughing and
(05:46):
just thinking, oh yeah, you know, he's got to tell
me all the risks. He has to tell me everything,
but it won't happen to us. I'll go on on
bed rest. I'll have the sea section. And you know,
I had already start I putting a playlist together for
the sea section. I had listened to some podcasts about
really positive sea sections. I had done the Rise Meditation.
(06:11):
We have a beautiful sea section birth meditation on the
Rise app. I was doing that and so I felt
really good. I felt really calm, I felt really excited,
and so I was slowing down for work. And it
was Friday, the eleventh of July, and I had my
last beauty appointments booked in. So because I knew it
(06:32):
was going on bed rest, you know, I booked in
my hair, nails, lashes, especially being postpartum. I just remember
with Ivy, I didn't do anything like that. And then I,
you know, wanted to get some of those appointments done postpartum.
And it's like very hard because you have a new
book and you can't, basically, So I was very onto
my appointments. That was kind of like the blessing of
(06:53):
having a specific date going into hospital. And so this
day it was I had my last appointments, and then
I just wanted a week with Tim and Ivy and
we were going to do a whole bunch of fun things.
And so I got my nails done, I got my
lashes done, and then I got home, me and Ivy
(07:14):
did some baking. Tim went to golf, and me and
Ivy played on the playground and you know, watched TV.
And it's funny because she was playing on the playground
and the sun was setting, and I just remember looking
at the sunset. You know, this is in the afternoon,
and I was just feeling so grateful, like all euphouri
(07:37):
R vibes, Like I remember thinking, oh my god, I
am obsessed with this home. I cannot believe we're in
our dream home. I cannot believe, you know, we found
this house, we moved in it. How good it feels,
how grounded I feel. I cannot believe how obsessed I
am with Tim and Ivy. I love being pregnant. I'm
(07:59):
so ready for a newborn, Like I was I'm talking
like ten out of ten grateful on the scale of
high vibration, I was, you know, one hundred and in
saying that that's not unusual for me. So I was
just like going with it, and I was like, you
know what a vibe. This is beautiful. And then Tim
got home from golf, we got takeout, we watched a movie,
(08:22):
still feeling really really good, and then we went to bed.
When we went to bed, I remember crying to Tim
and I was just quite upset about having to go
on bed rest leaving Ivy because since becoming pregnant, I know, scientifically,
you release a specific hormone that does make you know,
like the love you release, you were releasing more oxytocin
(08:45):
and like all those sorts of things, and so you
will find your toddlers if you have one ah more
clingy towards you. And so since being pregnant and slowing down,
my relationship with Ivy had really changed and evolved and
it was so sweet and beautiful and I was just
loving it so much. So I was having this like
(09:05):
physical reaction to going on to bed rest and away
from her, because you know, I put her to bed
every night. We cuddle, we read books, and you know,
I feel like I don't have to explain that. But
I was crying to Tim and I was like, I
don't want to go on beddress. I don't want to
go away from you guys. And he's like, it's fine,
We'll come up and see you every day. Like it's okay.
(09:26):
You just have to do what's best for you know
this baby, we already knew what we're gonna call it,
so you know, He's like, you just got to do
what's best for Lacey. And I was like, I know,
and but I was like, I was very emotional. Tim
then went to our sleep and I also took half
a sleeping tablet a restative, which is okay to take
(09:47):
when you're pregnant, do want to say that, but just half.
And this was something that I had done because I
was having really bad insomnia towards the end, to the
point where I would go to sleep, I'd wake up
at like eleven twelve or one am and I would
not get back to sleep, and then it was just
wrecking me the whole next day. And so I took
(10:10):
it half a sleeping tablet. Sometimes i'd take a quarter,
sometimes a half and that just helps me relax. And
I was finding too, I was, you know, peeing multiple
times a night because I was heavily pregnant, and taking
that I could get up to peek go straight back
to sleep, and so that's just something I was doing
that my doctor had helped me with. And so I
(10:32):
took you know, half a tablet of my sleeping tablet.
I was going to go to sleep, but then I
was like, it's Friday night and I'm gonna scroll on TikTok.
And it's funny because I don't really allow myself to
scroll during the week because I know sometimes then my
sleep is really bad. So I was like, no, I'm
going to treat myself. It's Friday night scrolling on TikTok,
and the algorithm was more, you know, like funny videos.
(10:56):
So I remember laughing, and I remember being like, oh shit,
I think I've weed myself, which is not uncommon when
you're pregnant, and so I was like, oh, I think
I've weed myself. And then even I didn't even get
up then, like I kind of just like stayed scrolling
for a little bit longer because I was watching something funny.
(11:16):
And then I was like oh no, I think I've
really weed myself. And so I got up, and when
I got up, I could feel, you know, like it
was like very wet down there, and I was like,
oh my god, surely I haven't like actually weed my weed,
like fully weed, like not just you know a little bit.
And I put my hand down there and put it up,
(11:37):
and you know, it was completely dark because Tim was asleep,
and I could see that there was something on my hand.
So I quickly went and turned the light on, looked
into the mirror, and my pajama pants were just soaking
in blood. And so I quickly went to the toilet
and pulled down my pants and there was blood clots.
And for a moment, I just kind of it's like
(12:00):
I just was like stuck in time, and it took
a moment to be like, holy shit, this is happening.
Something's not right. Obviously, something's not right. And I knew
I was only thirty four weeks. And it's funny because
I actually had a doctor's appointment the day before and
he was like, she's thirty four weeks, you know, only
(12:21):
a couple more weeks, and you know, she's fully cooked.
At the moment her lungs are still underdeveloped. That happens
next week, and so I kind of just remember him
being like, she's basically you know, she's not fully cooked.
And I remember being like, oh my god, no, she
can't come out. She's too small, she's too young. And anyway,
(12:42):
so I had that thought in that micro moment, I
quickly woke up t him and turned on the light
and just stood there and he obviously saw my pajama
pants and his face just went fully white. And I
remember the look on his face and he just goes,
I'm getting eyes. Get like, get the keys, like, get
in the car. We need to go to the hospital.
(13:04):
Pull doctor mofree. And so he went and got Ivy
from bed. She was obviously sleeping, and I called my
doctor and I said, I'm bleeding. And he's like how
much because previously he said literally, if you have a
couple of drops, come into emergency, like that's how serious
(13:24):
the bleeding is with this condition. And so he's like,
how much you're bleeding. I'm like, no, I'm breeding. I'm
bleeding a lot. It's not good. And I'm like, I
my pajama pants are so it's like I need to
get a towel, and he was like getting like shit
is saying this, but he was like, Georgia, it is
so important that you get in the car and you
(13:46):
get here as soon as possible, like stay calm, I'm
going to meet you there, like don't grab anything, like
get in the car right now and leave. And I
could just feel the seriousness, you know, the emergency in
his voice, and I just was like, oh my god,
I can't believe this is happening, Like this can't be happening.
(14:10):
And so Tim got Ivy. We got in the car
and me and Tim were kind of just silent the
whole time. We just explained to Ivy, you know, mommy
is bleeding. We need to go to the hospital. You know,
baby sister might be coming out. We're very transparent with her.
And I called Tim's mum because they were on the coast,
(14:31):
and I just said, I'm bleeding really heavily. We're going
to the hospital. I need you to come and get
Ivy and she was like, yep, of course, we'll see
you guys soon. And then I called back and then
doctor Moffrey called me and he's like, how close are you?
I'm like five minutes away. He's like, all right, I'm here.
I'm waiting, come around the side, come straight to an
emergency like, don't park, you need we need to get
(14:52):
you straight in. And then he said, I think we're
having baby girl tonight. And I just like, I just
I had such a mix mix emotions because I was like, Okay, good,
she needs to come out, because obviously what's happening inside
is you know, not good. I'm bleeding. But then also
I just was like, oh my god, she's so small,
(15:14):
she's so tiny, she's undeveloped, her lungs are developed. And
so I just remember on the car ride there just
holding my stomach and I could feel her moving, so
that like I didn't feel completely scared for her life
because I could kind of feel her moving inside, so
I didn't feel like she had stopped moving. But I
(15:35):
just remember holding my stomach and being like, you have
to be okay, like just stay strong, you have to
be okay, and was just kind of talking to her
that I said to her, you might be coming out tonight,
but you have to be okay. Daddy's going to be
with you. And then so yeah, then we got to hospital.
(15:55):
My doctor was literally there. He like opened the car door.
He got me out, Tim got IVR and we went
straight in. We went into a birth suite and did
there was like a whole bunch of nurses rushed in.
He did an examination. He wanted to put I don't
really know what it's called, but he wanted to put
(16:16):
basically like something inside that stopped you bleeding. And he
put it in and it fell straight out, and he
was like, oh my god. We didn't say he didn't say,
oh my god, but he was like, Georgia, you're already
in spontaneous labor. We have to we have to get
her out right now. Because again, like I said at
(16:38):
the start, if you go into spontaneous labor instantly, baby
girl is on a time limit where it's you know,
very detrimental for her. So he said that, and I
was like, oh my god. And they he yelled out
to the nurses and he's like, we need to get her,
you know, to the O R, you know whatever it's called,
(17:01):
straight away. She needs to come out right now. That
all the nurses rushed in. They were you know, asking
me questions, they were putting things on me. They put
me on the stretcher, they took my clothes off, and
then we were like leaving towards the or and I
hadn't seen Tim and Ivy, and I was like, wait,
like I have to say about it him and Ivy
and they were in the waiting room or something. So
(17:21):
then they came and I just said to Tim like,
don't stay with me. Make sure you like go with
Lacey when she's born, like wherever she is, don't worry
about me. And then you know, gave Ivy a big
kiss and cuddle and just said, you know, mummy's going
to go have baby sister and we'll see you soon.
(17:44):
And she was really sleepy and stuff, so she didn't
really understand the situation. So then they wheeled me through
ther like through the hospital to the o R. Again.
I just remember there was like ten or so people
in the room, a lot of people asking questions. I
remember also thinking because I had just had dinner at
(18:04):
seven pm and it was nine pm, and I remember
thinking like, how can I go under you know, under
like I've just had food. And they made me drink
this like certain solution that helps like dissolve things in
your stomach. And then my doctor said, now I know
that you know you wanted to receive her, but you've
(18:25):
lost too much blood and it's too dangerous for both
of you. You will have to, you know, be completely under.
And at that moment I just kind of was in
that surrendered state of just like you do whatever you
need to do to get her safe. I think I
even said that to him, and I was like, yeah,
(18:46):
it's fine, just you know, get her out kind of thing.
So it was very full on and then I was
even awake when they put the catheter in, like they
didn't really have enough time to do it all in
the proper way and so put the kaff it in.
I had quite a few canulas in my arms, and
also we had some machines in there if I lost
(19:09):
too much blood. And then the last thing I remember
is obviously just you know, having that thing on your
mouth and getting put under. And when he told me
she was going to come out tonight, like back when
we were in the birth suite, I remember my whole
body just started shaking. It's like I think before, because
(19:32):
I had had the sleeping tablet, I was quite relaxed
considering the situation and the amount of blood, and I
was just like talking to her, I felt quite relaxed.
I was breathing, and then when he was like, she's
not okay, you're in spontaneous labor. We need her get
her out right now, I just oh, and I'm getting
(19:53):
shivers saying it to you guys, but like I just
started shaking. And that's when I started really freaking out,
being like, oh my god, like what about if I
wake up and she's not okay or you know, you
always go to the worst case scenario, So that was
really really scary, really full on. But then they put
(20:15):
me under. That's the last thing I remember. I woke
up in the recovery room and straight away the nurse goes,
she's fine, she's healthy, her lungs are underdeveloped, so she
(20:37):
did need to go in on oxygen. Sorry, and in
they call it in like an iso neet capsule thing
where the baby needs to go in and have oxygen.
So she's like, she's fine, your husband's with her, and
I just was like, oh, Like obviously, instant relief felt
(20:57):
so much better. And then I stayed in recovery just
probably only like ten minutes, and then they wheeled me
up to see her in the special care nursery and
she was so small. Oh my gosh, she was tiny.
So she was born at two point two kilos and
then they lose a bit, so she ended up losing
and weighing just two kilos. So if you think of
(21:20):
how small two kilos is, it's yeah, she was so tiny.
And so the first time I saw her, she was,
you know, hooked up to all the machines, she had
like a oxygen mask on, she had a canula in
and obviously it was very full on to see her
like that, and then I had just had emergency surgery,
(21:44):
and yeah, it was very full on. It was very emotional.
So we saw her, we stayed with her for a bit,
and at this point, you know, it's like eleven twelve pm,
so the timeline was I noticed how it was bleeding,
probably twenty to nine, and then we got to the
hospital at nine and then she was born at nine
(22:08):
twenty two, so very very quick, you know. And it's
it's funny because you know, a couple of people have asked, like,
you know, how does Tim you know, feel about this experience,
And obviously he was very you know, scared, and it
was very forlorn. But the way he describes it is
(22:29):
it was such a short amount of time from like
you know, eight forty to her being born at nine twenty.
He kind of was in shock, but didn't You don't
have a lot of time to sit in the worrying
and that sort of thing. So that's kind of a
blessing because it was all just so far so from
(22:50):
the time that I started bleeding, I was like, holy shit,
I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know,
you know, how she is, till only you know, an
hour later knowing she's okay. That side of things is
that was a blessing rather than you know, not knowing
for longer, but very full on, very traumatic. And then
(23:12):
after that we got willed back to the room, so
she stayed in special care nursery. They had a feeding
tube for her, and we got back to the room
and I couldn't really sleep that night. I really struggled.
I don't know if it was like the drugs from surgery,
but I was like off and on. And they also
come and check you every two hours, so they check
(23:35):
your incision, they check your blood pressure and everything like that.
And then Tim slept and then the next day woke
up in order to go and see her. I had
to have a shower and get out of bed. So
I did that, And can we just talk about the
C section recovery because I'm just gonna be really honest
(23:57):
with you guys. It was pretty fucked up. I don't know.
I think i'd spoken to I have a couple of
girlfriends who had had a sea section, and they were like,
it's not that bad, you know, the recovery is really fine. No,
it was so full on, like the pain was quite excruciating.
(24:18):
And look, I'm sorry if you knew you're booked in
for a sea section, and I'm not trying to scare
anyone or like, I'm just telling you my experience, but
the recovery was so full on. I've had a vaginal
birth with Ivy and then having a sea section, and honestly,
I would opt for the vaginal birth any day of
(24:38):
the week, and that I was in labor for you know,
twenty hours. But it's just I was so painful and
I couldn't like stand up straight, and I just like, oh,
I don't know if it made a difference because it
was an emergency, but yeah, the recovery was not well
and I had to take quite a few pain meds
(24:59):
to just like feel okay, and then you know, when
you're in pain meds, you never feel like yourself. So
the next couple of days after that were really full
on because we couldn't actually hold Lacey for three days,
and that's because her oxygen levels kept dipping, and so
she had to stay in this like it's called an
(25:22):
isolate where it's she's got like oxygen through her, you know,
like an oxygen mask, but then also oxygen in this
like tank sort of thing where she was in. And
then the peeds doctor just explained that you know, if
you take her out to hold her, it could dip
and it can just really affect then her recovery. So
(25:44):
obviously again we're going to listen to the doctors and
but that was very full on and very emotional time.
You can imagine going through emergency c section at just
thirty four weeks and then not receiving your baby when
they first come out, and then not being able to
hold her for three days. Yeah, it was very very difficult,
(26:07):
very emotional. I was crying pretty much the whole time,
and Tim was amazing though, he really held me emotionally
and physically through that time, and really, yeah, I think
I felt this too with Ivy's birth, but I feel
(26:27):
like since Lacey was born, like our relationship it again
has gotten stronger because of what you go through, you know,
together and how he showed up for you know, me
and Lacey during that time. It's really really special. So yeah,
the next couple of days were just kind of a
blur out. Lacey was getting fed through a tube and
then kind of like the next sort of season that
(26:50):
you not sorry, the next kind of thing is Lacey
had to stay in the special care nursery. I was
you know, after a c section, you stay in hospital
for five days, and so what that kind of looked
like was once I could hold her, I was going
(27:10):
up to hold her, you know, as much as possible,
but it was usually on you twice a day, just
because again we didn't want her oxygen to dip. And
then I was pumping, so my milk came in after
day three, and before that I was just expressing clossroom
and I was actually getting a lot, and with Ivy
I didn't get a lot, so I was like really
loving that factor. So we were feeding her classroom. She
(27:34):
was also getting fed through the tube, and because she
was a PREMI they actually have a program in the
hospital where they have donated breast milk, so through the tube,
she was getting breast milk, you know, from someone else
the first three days, and then my milk came in
out day three and then I was pumping every three hours,
(27:54):
and I was very grateful that my supply was really good,
and yeah, my milk was My supply was good. So
she then was feeding off my breast milk from then,
and I honestly think my supply was really good this
time because if you think of a newborn's mouth, you know,
they can only suck so much and then they get
(28:16):
tired and they stop, whereas I was pumping every three
hours for twenty minutes, and so I think just like
the constant pumping just really brought my milk in sooner.
But obviously you're not supposed to pump. You're supposed to
let the newborn do it. But Lacey wasn't breastfeeding. So
then the week that I was in hospital, yeah, just
(28:38):
going back and forth, you know, seeing her pumping, and honestly,
that was probably the hardest time because you know, I
was in hospital recovering from birth, without a baby in
my room and going back and forth saw from the
(29:01):
c section, very emotional. All the hormones is wild, and yeah,
I've honestly never cried so much my life. And yeah,
it was like really really dramatic, if I'm being honest.
And the hospital was great though. The nurses were great,
The hospital was great. The actual director of the maternity
(29:22):
unit ended up coming to see me, and I just
remember breaking down, you know, hysterically crying to her after
day five, being like I can't leave the hospital, like
I can't leave without her. It just like in my body,
it just like I just couldn't, Like I just I
felt so physically unwell that I was supposed to leave
(29:44):
the hospital without my baby. And they were really good.
They let me stay another couple of nights because I
think they could see my mental health was not well,
and so I stayed another couple of nights, and during
those times too, I could start breastfeeding Lacey. So I
started doing a couple of they call them nuzzles, so
(30:05):
nuzzling her, just putting on herd the boob, and then
she was getting fed by the tube after and then
it was time to leave the hospital, which was honestly
one of the hardest days because it was hard because
obviously I had to leave her in the hospital, but
like I knew she was getting taken care of by
(30:26):
the special care nurses. But then also I wanted to
go home and see Ivy. And I felt really bad
for Ivy because you know, she did come up and
see us at the hospital, but like I said, I just,
you know, I just you know, really wanted to see
how I really need to spend time with her, But
then I wanted to be at the hospital of Lacey.
(30:48):
So it was just really hard because I felt like
my heart was like breaking into so I wanted to
be at the hospital, but then I wanted to be
home with Ivy, and so I really didn't know how
it was going to feel. But then I left the
hospital and it was actually it actually was better because
during the hospital, you know, being in this room, just
(31:11):
the hospital environment can be like a bit depressing, let's say.
And so I got home, I got into my own bed,
I unpacked, my parents were there. They stayed with us
for a couple of weeks, so my parents were there.
It was really good to see them. And then I
would go and visit Lacy in the hospital twice a day.
So even though I didn't want to leave the hospital,
(31:33):
once I did, I was kind of glad because I
got some normalcyat at home and just like being in
your own house, your own clothes, your own bed is
like so much nicer. But then I would go up
and visit Lacey, So I'm glad when I got home.
But then, like before, I didn't want to leave the hospital.
It was really really hard. So yeah, then I got
(31:54):
home and then it was probably about two weeks of
going up and down to the hospital. So basically how
it would look was because the criteria for Lacey to
come out of special care nursery was she needed to
be putting on weight and she needed to be having
all suck feeds, So you know, she feeds every three
(32:17):
hours and at the start, she's getting fed through the tube.
And because premes are so tiny, if they're sucking on
a bottle or breast, it exhausts them and they can
like start to lose weight and not put on weight.
So the hospital kind of make you do it in
a very slow way where it starts with one breastfeed
(32:38):
a day and then you go to two breastfeeds a day,
but it has to be like six hours in between,
and then you go to three, but it has to
be like every second breastfeed, and it's like all this criteria.
So I feel like once I left the hospital, I
was kind of in survival mode of just getting Lacey
home and so like whatever the doctor said I could do,
(33:02):
Like if it was okay, you can go to two breastfeeds,
you know, I was just doing whatever I could do
and obviously trying to be there as much as possible.
And so what it would look like is I'd wake
up at five thirty after pumping every three hours overnight,
wake up at five thirty. We'd get to the hospital
at six am, do the first feed. We'd stay, we'd stay,
(33:25):
maybe get a coffee or something, and then do the
next feed, go home for lunchtime, and then come back
and stay till you know, six or seven pm. And
we kind of did that, yeah, for two weeks straight,
and the hospital, like when I asked the nurses at
the start when she was, you know, thirty four weeks
(33:48):
in hostel, I said, you know, what's the kind of
time limit of her coming home? And everyone said, look,
probably not till she's thirty nine weeks like term that's
generally where they come home. And so I was like,
you know, that's like a month in hospital, a month
going back and forth. And I even remember when they
(34:09):
said it, I'd like thought on my head, I was like, no,
she's going to come home sooner. So I was like
very determined on getting her home and doing whatever was necessary.
And we were very lucky because she was she was
such a good feeder and she got on the breast
straight away, she'd wake up for all her feeds, like
(34:31):
she was just she was doing really, really well. So
she ended up coming home when she was just thirty
six and a half weeks, which all the nurses and
the hospital were like really surprised that she could like
get to that point. And I was just so happy
and so relieved. And I feel like, you know, from
that thirty four weeks, from the emergency C section to
(34:53):
the thirty six, you know, thirty seven, I was just
in survival mode and I couldn't like I couldn't like
talk to anyone on the phone. I couldn't like be
in the outside world. It was very like I was
in this bubble and I just was like doing what
was necessary to get Lacey home and you know, be
with Ivy and recover. And then yeah, then once Lacey
(35:16):
came home, Oh, it just was like instant relief. And
that's when you know, I felt like I could like
start her POSTPARTU, my postparter because it just like also
was very odd because you know, you're trying to recover
from a C section and you're going, you're you know,
(35:38):
getting up and down, you're driving. I personally wasn't driving,
was getting driven, but like the whole you're not really
recovering and you're in survival mode. So it really wasn't
until Lacey was home that I felt relief and was like,
oh my god, I can actually just like be and
oh she came home and it was just like the best,
(35:58):
Like I cannot even explain to you the feeling of
when she came home and we were a family. It
was just so special. And my parents they stayed one
more week just to make sure, you know, we were
sorted with Lacey, and then they left and it was
just you know, meetim and Ivy and Lacey and it
was just so special. Yeah, I just can't even explain
(36:23):
that period. Then for a good, like month after, I
just just would hold her, look at her and just
be so obsessed. And then yeah, since then, Honestly, she
is such a beautiful baby. She has such an amazing temperament.
(36:44):
I don't know, I think everyone has said it's well
deserved after the birth and everything we went through postpartum,
but it was just so incredible to get her home
and then she just fed and she slept, and obviously
she's a newborn, you know, she cries, she cluster feeds
(37:04):
and all the things. But I cannot tell you how
just in love with her and the newborn bubble and
postpartum I am. Even though it was a very full on,
you know, birth experience and everything that happened, I just
(37:25):
feel so grateful. I just feel so happy. I honestly,
I feel like I'm about to cry just thinking of
how happy I am that she's here and she's okay
and we're together, and I don't know, she's just perfect.
She's an actual angel baby. And I know this is normal,
(37:47):
but I just like sit and look at her all day.
I just breastfeed her, look at her, and I'm just obsessed.
And it's crazy because when I got pregnant I really
was intentional about scripting exactly what I'm telling you and
being like, I remember writing in my journal. Actually, let
(38:10):
me see if I can find because I often put
things in my notes as my journal, and let me
actually read out a journal piece for you. Okay, So
this is a journal piece I wrote from June twenty ninth. Yeah,
(38:31):
June twenty ninth. So it's like what twelve days before
I gave birth? So I just wrote, you know, I'm
so grateful I get to rest before I get to
rest from home before our C section birth. I love
spending so much time with Ivy Girl and feeling so
rested and calm blah blah blah, and so I say,
(38:54):
the first moments of seeing baby Girl is like nothing
I've ever experienced. It is pure magic. We are so
well rested. Baby girl is so calm, love snuggles and
is so easy. She latches straight away, easily, finding feeding
natural and normal. I feel so calm and at peace.
(39:17):
My recovery is easier than I expected. I feel so healthy,
so full of energy, and so ready for the newborn nights.
The newborn knights are easy too. I notice her cues,
I pick up on them and she's so settled and
feeds easily and sleeps so well. We are so grateful.
(39:38):
I feel so amazing in my body and in my mind,
and in this new season, I've never been happier. So
that's what I wrote in my notes, and I can
truly say that's how I feel despite everything happening with
the birth. And again, you guys know, everything only has
(39:59):
a meaning if you put on that like, put that
meaning onto it. So even though quote unquote my birth
you know, could be called traumatic and you could label
it a whole host of things, I really just don't
feel that way. Like it was full on and it
really required a new level of growth and resilience and
(40:24):
capacity from me, but it honestly was like the most
incredible thing because not only did it birth Lacey, who
was just I just yeah, obviously obsessed, so in love,
but it birthed and new me and I feel so different.
I feel so much more me. I don't know if
(40:46):
that's even if I'm articulating things right, but I just
feel so much more me. And the way I can
explain it is, I'm like it was perfect. It was
all meant to go that way. We were meant to
go through that because how I feel right now is
so connected to Lacey, so connected to myself, so at peace.
(41:09):
I feel so safe in my body. I feel like
I just have this deep knowing that everything, like everything
that has happened up until now, was bringing us to
this point. And I just feel I don't know, I
just feel pure bliss. I feel pure happiness. I feel
(41:31):
so content. It's just right. And I hope I'm articulating
that well. But yeah, so that is the wild story. Again,
this is just my experience. And like I said, despite
like if someone you know is probably hearing this, probably thinking,
(41:53):
holy shit, that's wild. It was, but also, yeah, it
was so perfect for us. And now you know, I
am about two months postpartum. We're finding our croove, she's
sleeping really well, we're just feeding on demand. We're getting
a couple of long stretches at night. And it's funny.
(42:13):
I was telling Jamie this morning, I, you know, wore
my whoop when I was pregnant, and I just want
to say to my pregnant mammas, like, newborn tired is
not as bad as pregnancy tired. When I was pregnant
and wearing my whoop, I literally could not get out
of the orange or red because it will give you, like,
(42:34):
you know, green. If you're in the green, you're good
to go, and then it goes down to orange and
then red and red obviously means like do nothing today
because you're exhausted. And when I was pregnant with Lacey,
I was always in the orange and red despite having
like an eight nine hour sleep. Obviously the insomnia wasn't helping.
But like I'm waking up, you know, probably twice a
(42:59):
night at the moment, with her being eight weeks on
a rare occasion just once, but mostly twice a night,
and I'm still in the green. And I think it's
just because recovery is going so much. Recovery is going
really well with the C section. I am really onto
(43:19):
all my supplements. If you haven't listened to the postpartum
Glow Up episode where I talk about what I'm doing postpartum,
I actually recorded that when I was pregnant, but I
had a plan in place. I'm doing everything in that
plan in regards to the supplements I'm taking, the water
I'm drinking and everything like that. And yeah, newborn tired,
(43:42):
not as bad like I wake up twice a night,
and the wake ups are about forty five minutes to
an hour. That's how long it takes to feed her.
And honestly like, fine, Obviously I have my days and
I can get a bit agitated and whatnot, but honestly fine.
And so if you're pregnant and you're like, oh my god,
especially if you have a toddline and you're like, I
(44:02):
don't know how I'm going to do this, trust me
when I say newborn tired is not as bad as
pregnancy tired. So yes, despite everything, I am feeling so good,
so happy, and just really loving this current season. Thank
you so much for listening to this episode of the
Rise and Conquer podcast. If you enjoyed it and want more,
(44:25):
connect with us via Instagram or continue the conversation on
our beautiful Facebook community page. All the details are in
the show notes, and I'd love to hear more about
your journey. Also, we're an independent podcast with a small
but mighty team, so we really do appreciate your support.
If you have a spare moment, please click the follow
(44:45):
or subscribe button to the podcast, and if you leave
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