March 31, 2023 • 38 mins
Ben Maller talks about Florida QB Anthony Richardson dazzling during his Pro Day and if he is buying the hype, where Richardson will end up, Lame Jokes of the Week, and much more!
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello and welcome. It's our number three, Hour three from
the audio Dojo. We break up the baseball talks or
for some little football football talk right now. And what
is your position on the Florida Gators quarterback Anthony Richardson,
who is said to have had a dazzling Pro Day
(00:22):
performance in front of NFL scouts. How do you explain
the over the top Pro Day coverage. There's a whole
cottage industry around the Pro Bowl or the Pro days,
these college pro days. And where do you see Anthony
Richardson being drafted? As we are heading into April this weekend,
the NFL Draft at the end of the month, where
(00:44):
do you see this cat being drafted? We'll get to
all of that and much more, including lame jokes of
the week here. It is our number three, the next
big Thing, if you buy the hype, the next big Thing.
Wel God, I'm in the beginning of another hour of
the Ben Maller Show. We are in the air everywhere
(01:08):
hob nubbers as we traverse the peaks and valley's coast
to coast, port, the border and beyond. On the vast
and wonderfully powerful microphones of fs are emanating live from
the cookware as we keep the pot boiling all night
under the cover of darkness and powered by moonlight. We
(01:31):
are broadcasting live from the tirac dot Com studios tirac
dot com. We'll help you get there and unmatched selection,
bast free shipping, free road hazard protection, and over ten
thousand or recommended installers ti iraq dot com. The way
tire buying should be talked A lot of baseball, but
(01:51):
our lead this hour comes from the NFL. We'll get
back to the baseball conversation in a bit, but we
know where our bread is buttered, and that is pigskin.
Our bread is buttered with pigskin. Now, the big story
bouncing around the echo chamber of football in the pigskin
world is out of Gainesville floor, the college campus of
(02:14):
the Florida Gators football team, their workout facility, and that
was the backdrop where Anthony Richardson worked out. Oh you're
not a draft nick if you don't know Anthony Richardson.
You're not a draft nerd if you don't know that name.
But he is the quarterback who did not play all
that well in college and now is being projected as
(02:35):
a first round pick. So if you didn't hear about this,
maybe not. I was sleeping when it happened, but I
was able to watch some of the clips online when
I woke up. We are told that Anthony Richardson not
only went out and worked out in his underwear for
NFL scouts, but he dazzled. He dazzled the onlookers at
the Gators indoor practice facility as he was slinging that football.
(03:00):
You're there and everywhere. There were three NFL head coaches
at least that were on hand. Frank Wright of the
Carolina Panthers, Pete Carroll of the Seahawks, and Doug Peterson
of Jacksonville were there. There were a bunch of high
falutin executives, general manager types, scouting types all over the place,
and they were all hanging out watching the workout of
(03:23):
not only the quarterback, but a bunch of other players
from Florida as well, mostly looking for that diamond in
the roof. You gotta find the diamond in the roof.
So let us discuss the question, what is your position
on Anthony Richardson's Wow Pro Day. I've got Whopper, seacrest
(03:45):
and charcuterie board and we'll combine all of these things
together and we are gonna make some hot talk. Hot talk.
That's what we're doing. So, first of all, we have
become numb to the Pro Day spectacles. This has become
a new thing. Each year, it gets bigger and bigger
and bigger and bigger, and eventually it's just going to
(04:08):
explode and they'll be large flying everywhere. It's wild to
me that these events still have the viral power and
seemingly get bigger and bigger and bigger in a pocket
of time this time of the year. Now, Anthony Richardson,
I have nothing against the guy. I don't know him.
(04:28):
His selling point, based on what I've been reading and
what I've been seeing, is athleticism size. He's got a
bazooka arm, possesses that rocket launcher, and you love it.
Throw the ball deep down the field in the carefully
choreographed ecosystem that is a Pro Day on a college campus. Richardson,
let it all hang loose. It's not worried about anything.
(04:51):
Certainly not would be defenders indoors at the Florida Gator's
practice facility and what I saw and everything that I've
been told than red he painted a masterpiece. It was
a Michaelangelo out there on the field that Richardson. Depending
on which report you believe the report, I believe, he
attempted sixty two passes in front of the scouts. He
completed fifty five of the sixty two. He was throwing
(05:15):
darts here, rainbow passes, dropping into the bread basket over there,
putting an exclamation point on his performance there as he
casually completed a seventy yard pass play and then did
some cart wheels down the field. Looked like there were
some cheerleaders there also. I don't know what they were
(05:35):
doing there, but he was tumbling like an all star.
So my reaction, whoop de damn dude, that is my reaction.
I am not impressed. I am not impressed, and I
rolled my eyes. I'll tell you why. It's the whopper.
It's the whopper on the boob tube. You never look
(05:59):
at a commercial for food. You don't because when you
get that food, it is nothing like the commercial. Like
I used to eat a ton of fast food back
in my big eaten days. The fast food menu items,
you know what I'm where I'm going with this. They're
notorious because you watch a commercial, you see an ad online,
(06:19):
they look delicious, and then when you go to the
drive through and you order the meal that you were
looking at on a website or on television, they let
you down one pc of the time. Why, well, it's
kind of obvious. They have food stylists. And there's some
really crazy videos on the YouTube on the internet if
(06:41):
you go down that rabbit hole on how they make
those commercials. And I've read some stories on this. I've
watched a number of those videos because I'm a loser
and I'm into that kind of stuff. How they market products.
And they use undercooked beef patties to make those fast
food burgers look so good and make them look moist
and plump, and they actually add the grill marks after
(07:04):
they cook the burger. They puff them up. The sesame
seed buns are not what you might think they are.
And they use sponges out of the microwave to create
steam to make it look like the burger steaming. And
they use toothpicks to place the lettuce and the tomato
and the pickles and all that in a certain way
(07:24):
so they look appetizing. All the tricks they use wax,
they mix in wax in the barbecue sauce, so it
has a little bit of a pop to it, but
the same with a pro day. The pro day is
wax in the barbecue sauce. It's a toothpick holding the
tomato and the pickle. That's what it is. There's no defense.
(07:45):
Everything is planned out. You're in your happy place. You're
in a place that you played college football and you
practiced every day. It's not indicative of real life. It's
not one of the ways I relate to this. Working
in the radio business, and we've been at Fox Sports
Radio for a very long time. In the early days
(08:08):
of Fox Sports Radio, they hired somebody to work at
this company who had the most amazing demo tape you
could possibly have. How do I know that? My boss
told me that they were bragging this person so amazing.
Oh my god, you know, I was like kind of
spitting a loogie in my face. The boss no longer
at the company, by the way, but they were like, oh,
this person is amazing, greatest demo I've ever seen, and
(08:30):
all that stuff. We hired this guy. Oh, mine's worked
in all these big cities. So they hired the guy
based on the demo tape the guy got to Fox
Sports Radio. He walked in is the single most famous
line ever stated in that building, the mothership of Fox
Sports Radio. He walks in, he looks at all the buttons,
He looks at all the different gadgets and gizmos and
(08:52):
what's your mccollets and thingamajigs that you have to know
how to use when you work at Fox Sports Radio.
He looked at all this and he compared it to
running the Space Shuttle. He compared it to the Space Shuttle.
But he had the greatest tape of all time. And
that's the way I look at these Pro days. It's like, yeah,
(09:13):
it's fine, but it's not based on anything that matters
to me. I'd rather see you dominate on the field
in college and then go out and suck in the
Pro day. I'd rather draft you that way than vice versa. Now, secondly,
how do you explain in general the over the top
Pro day coverage? So I call it star gazing? Isn't
(09:36):
what I call it? Not belly buddy button gazing? Star
gazing like Ryan Seacrest should work at the NFL network
as MC. It's American idol. The football version you're trying
to find the next superstar. You don't want to miss
out on the big shiny object at quarterback. You're willing
to overlook all the flaws, all the incomplete passes, all
(09:57):
the missed opportunities, the imperfections. Because Richardson is singing the
ball around against air inside a practice bubble in Florida,
and he wasn't perfect. He actually hit the roof of
the building with one of his throws. But let's see
him actually go out and replicate that in a game
against the Chiefs or the Bang Goals or the Bills.
(10:20):
You see, I'm Benny Buzzkill on this one. I'm Benny
Buzzkill on this one. We have seen too many players
over the years drafted because the scouts start wagging their tongues.
They're all excited. It's the measurables. It's the measurables. That's stupid. Dumb, dumb, dumb,
dumb dumb, dumb, dum dum dumb, that's what it is.
(10:42):
And then when the player arrives, they can't get it
done for a myriad of reasons when it actually matters.
And my examples are Zach Wilson, Johnny Manziel, who was
actually a good college player but had some quality workouts.
And jo Marcus Russell. That's old school JaMarcus Roll. So
what do I know? I just do the Overnight Show,
(11:03):
all right, final fun. So where do you see Anthony
Richardson being draft? Don't really care about the pro day.
Wasn't that good at Florida. I've seen stories saying that
he's going to be a top three pick in the draft.
I don't believe that. I believe he will be drafted
in the first round. It's far fetched to think that
he'll be a top five pick in the draft. At
(11:25):
this point. Based on the evidence that I have, Anthony
Richardson will be a top fifteen pick. And if you're
listening in Seattle, you might want to get out your
prayer beads. It sounds like the Seahawks are the most interested,
but Richardson's met with a number of teams, including the
Raiders and the Carolina Panthers, who have the number one
pick in the draft, and he will be the beneficiary
(11:49):
of a fundamental flaw in the NFL. They continue to
suffer from a supply chain issue at quarterback and the
way scouting work and We know this from watching our
football over the years and being meathead football fans. Anthony
Richardson is the football version of a charcutery board. He
(12:10):
is scouts look at a little bit of this, a
little bit of that, a whole lot of that. And
you look at a charcutery board. Usually they've got meats
and cheeses on there, but sometimes you've got fresh and
dried vegetables. You've got different kinds of nuts. Some people
like the olives. I don't like the olives. They've got
honeys and jams and all that, all that nonsense, but
(12:35):
that's what he is. He's a little bit of this,
a little bit out you. You'll imagine, if everything goes right,
this guy's gonna be a juggernaut. He's gonna be running
through people and running over people, and it's gonna be wild.
He's a little wooden sampler platter. Problem is, there's also
a warning label right there. It says buyer beware. Is
(12:56):
what it says, buyer beware, because Anthony Richardson is raw.
He's crude, only starting thirteen games, wobbly under live fire,
madly inaccurate. The most important skill is accuracy. This guy
is a scattershot quarterback, completed fifty three percent of his
(13:18):
passes in the Southeastern Conference, only attempted three hundred ninety
three total passes this entire time in Gainesville. But what
about the seventy yard throw? What about the body built
like Adonis? Because we all know watching the NFL for years,
that the most common throw in a regular season game
(13:41):
is a seventy yard hail mary down the field. It
is not a ten to twenty yard throw within ten
to twenty yards of the line of scrimmage, often within
five yards of the line of scrimmage, or throwing between
defensive players in the middle of the field. Those throws
never happened. It's always the seven five yard chuck it
(14:02):
and duck it. That's the most popular throw, unless not quite.
It's Ben Maller's show on Fox. You want to comment
on any of that, you can join us here at
eight seven seven ninety nine on Fox. That's eight seven
seven nine nine six six three six nine. Also on
Twitter at Ben mallor you can be part of the
show that's at Ben Maller and join the festivus of talk.
(14:26):
And we're on Twitter at Ben Maller. As I said,
that's at Ben Mallory. You can be part of the show.
That way. We've got lamb jokes the week coming up
a little bit later the hour. Time now for the
Mallor Riddle of the Day. And here it is Mallor
Riddle of the Day. Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis
Kelsey was recently asked to name all of the blank
(14:48):
and couldn't do it. Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis
Kelsey was asked recently to name all of the blank
and could not do it. Could not do it. That
is the Maller Riddle of the day. The answer will
(15:08):
get to it and we will do it next. Have guys,
I've had guys. What do they even mean? Be sure
to catch live editions of The Ben Maller Show weekdays
at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific on Fox Sports
Radio and the iHeartRadio. Hi Malla, Milicia, turn on your radio.
(15:39):
It's time to listen to the Man. Malasia's in the
air and everywhere, so don't be lame. I'm milogest comeling
sue when man begins to blow the show Stars. Mallor
(16:01):
joined the curious world of the Ben Maller show online.
It is pain free and easy to do. Just follow
your host on Twitter. He's at Ben Mallard and you
can tweet at and follow our technical producer. He plays
all the music and most of the funny soundbites in
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last name is Flores. You can fall on Raider Underscore,
rob twenty four Hip, Hello, retirack dot com, Fox Sports
(16:26):
Radio Studios. It's Ben Mallor Philly. No Rash quit the
band will rash show up. I'm death the kids. May
Mallard meet and greet in the Minnesota. Will find out
sometimes hopefully you're nice to meet him. Time to pay
off the Mallor Riddle of the day, the malor riddle
(16:49):
of the day, and we'll get the calls you got
lame jokes later in the hour. Here's the malor riddle
of the day. Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelsey
was recently asked to name all the blank and couldn't
do it. Could not do it. That is the riddle
of the day. What is the answer? And let's see.
(17:10):
Eloy from Compton says, that's easy, big man. He didn't
know the last time the donkeys beat them, He says,
who else do we have? Page down? Page down? I
can't to read that. On the air, Bean boot Maker
Bob said all twenty six letters of the alphabet was
(17:30):
the problem. Rob in Vegas Kelsey could not name all
the members of One Direction? Who else? Page down? Page down?
Late Night Drug Tester says he could not name the
last guest on the fifth Hour podcast. Hey my fault man,
I don't book the guest. My man Danny. She likes
to just do the party. He does not want to
(17:50):
pook guest. Who else we have? Ferd Dog says the
answer to the Mallard riddle is all of the Ben
Mallers show callers. That That is the answer. Nick in
Wisconsin says, let's see here, can't read that. I said,
all right, he actually got he saw what I was
talking about. Bad job by him. Page down, page down.
(18:11):
Mallard prop guys says Travis. Kelsey could not name all
of the Fox Sports radio host update anchors, producers and
technical directors like Emmett the Blind Seahawk fan. Matt the
Warrior Radio Rays fan says. Kelsey was just asked to
name all of the steroids that he's taken. We could
not do it. That's a low blow. How dare you?
(18:33):
Donkey Sausage says he cannot name all the Fox Sports
radio host which I don't think I could name all
the Fox Sports radio hosts. And I work here page down,
a page down. A National Lampoon Movies guest by Rob
the Goatman in Iowa. Let's see we have all of
Santa's reindeer guests by Calligan Tim Greg the real estate
(18:57):
guy from Baltimore says Travis Kelsey was asked to name
all the colors of the rainbow and was unable to
pull that off. All the emojis on his phone. Guests
by Alf the Alien, Opiner, Shane and Demoine sist answer
all of the Mallar Militia to name all the Mallar Militia.
Was unable to do that. You can't read that. Teenage
(19:19):
mutant Ninja Turtles guests by disgruntled Viking Rube as his answer, Eddie,
do you have an answer, Eddie? Yes, he could not
name all of the Fast and Furious movies. That's impossible
to name. Nope, the correct answer. It turns out that
Travis Kelsey Hall of Fame tied end for your Kansas
City Chiefs. On his Fledgling podcast, was unable to name
(19:44):
all of the head coaches in the NFL. There was
that photo from the owners meetings this week in Arizona.
They had the coaches photo and Travis Kelsey, who's played
for the NFL for years, could not name all of
the coaches. Now. He said he's not good with names.
So his brother Jason Kelsey said, okay, just name name
(20:08):
the teams. He couldn't do that. He missed. You want
to take a guess, Eddie, how many teams he got wrong?
Out of the thirty two teams in the NFL, how
many coaches he got wrong? I'll say he got ten wrong?
Close he was? He was eight off. He got eight wrong.
He did not know the names of eight coaches in
the NFL. Do you know all the names of the
(20:29):
coaches in the NFL? Eddie? I think so? You do?
Right now? If you want me to quiz you? Sure?
All right? No, no, no, Roberto, make sure he's not cheating. Roberto,
no cheating? Are you looking at a coop? Here we
go on the spot rapid fire head coach of the
Arizona Cardinals, Eddie oh they got a new coach, damn it.
(20:52):
Who replaced Cliff Kingsburgh. Come on, Eddie, he is the
first one. That's a hard one. It is a hard one.
I'm is it is it. It's one of the Eagles guys, right,
it was one of the Eagles on this guy, Shane Steiken. No, no,
the other guy, the other guy, the other guy. Who's
the coach of the Bills. Oh McDermott, Sean McDermott, that's right,
(21:17):
all right, Cincinnati Bengals, Zach Taylor, you get oh, you
get that one. Cleveland Browns. Uh, Cleveland Browns. Yeah, I'll
see his face in. He's got the beard. It's got
the beard there. Uh crap, crap is crap the coach.
I know that one. Yeah, I know. I know it too. Coup.
(21:38):
I'm just he's blanking. I'm blanking on it. Viking assistant
who as a group, Yeah, Kevin Stefansky, that's right. Here's
the hard one. Eddie, the Boats of the Charge. Yeah,
that's uh, oh wait a minute, Bozo the clown. Yeah,
(22:00):
Oh my god, Eddie, Eddie, your wife, Eddie, Eddie the
team Eddie, Oh my god, Eddie's gonna you're gonna lose
your thunderstick privileges. I could see him in my head
right now. It does not help, Eddie. I could see him,
(22:22):
unfortunately doing that thing where he was on all fours. Oh,
by Eddie. Edie thinks wife doesn't listen to the show,
and I'm sure no one will let missus Garcia know that.
This is happy Eddie. You got five seconds, four second
(22:43):
on three seconds Staley game, Eddie, you have failed the game.
I picked the game Steelers, Eddie hardest one, Eddie. Coach
of the Patriots. Go ahead, Eddie, right now, I think
it's Bill Belichick now stopped trying a couple of years ago.
(23:06):
He gave up. And that ends our spur of the moment.
Name that coach game? How about hockey? Can we do hockey? Oh?
I couldn't name. I can name one coach in hockey,
the coach of the Flyers. They can do that. I
don't think I can name any Is John Tortorella the
coach of the Fires. Yeah, okay, that's about it. That's
(23:31):
my my hockey hockey. I used to be able to
name all the coaches, but that was long ago, in
a different life. It is the Ben Mallers Show. As
we press on and we'll take some calls. We also
have the lame jokes of the week. But right now,
let's get back over to Eddie Garcia. Get you caught
up on everything going on in the old overnight. Too
many names to remember? Whose names? Way too many names.
(23:54):
We used to have a game show about that. Yeah,
should we bring that back? No? I liked it, but
I mean, I don't know. I liked it, but the
problem was everybody sucked at it. Yes, Well, to be fair,
I mean, and it's even harder now. It hasn't. It's
not like it's gotten easier. It's even harder now than
it was when we did it. Be sure to catch
live editions of The Ben Maller Show weekdays at two
(24:16):
am Eastern eleven pm Pacific. Hi, this is Jay Glazer.
And you may know me for the world of football
or fighting or even shows like HBO's Ballers. Well you
don't know is for my entire life. I have lived
in something I referred to as the gray depression anxiety.
So now I'm coming out with a new podcast, Unbreakable,
a mental health podcast with Jay Glazer where each week,
(24:38):
while we talk about mental health. I hope to describe it,
give it words. Listen to Unbreakable with Jay Glazer on
the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
This from college football. They got prime fever apparently in Boulder, Colorado.
Apparently the spring football game for the University of Colorado
(25:00):
with their new head coach Deon Sanders, has been sold out.
Forty five thousand tickets to watch the spring game for Colorado.
Last year, less than two thousand fans attended these spring games,
so I guess they're really excited to see Dion with
a whistle and walk around on the sidelines. I can't
imagine why this would be. Colorado football sucked for twenty years,
(25:22):
so it's not like they've had anything good there in
Colorado football wise. They'll I understand showing up for the
real game, of course, but the spring game. Dion is
a marketing maven. The guy's going around wearing cowboy hats.
He's going to embrace the buffalo culture. Spend your time
to go out there and watch Dion walk around in
a cowboy hat. Yeah? Why not? Man? Okay, people got
(25:48):
a lot of free time. I guess I don't know.
What else are you gonna do something else other than
that guy in Baltimore is upset, Eddie is that he
wants you to make sure you learn how to pronounce
the name of the Orioles catcher because he says, this
guy's a big deal and with Lamar Jackson possibly leaving Baltimore,
my guy, yeah, Adlee Rushman is the guy's name, Eddie.
(26:09):
He's like, I told Coop to draft in his fantasy
keeper baseball league and he listens to me. See now
you're just bragging, Roberto, You're just bragging about your baseball.
He said on the highlight it was Rushman, not Rushman's
how they pronounced the highlight. I watched listen my guy
sports with Coleman is a maideman in Baltimore. Do you
understand this guy oozes Baltimore sports? He does a podcast
(26:33):
with Adam Jones, the old oriole player. That's how into
Baltimore sports. The guy is, okay, do you understand that
I'm just saying, not really, but okay. You do not
believe that this guy in Roberto both pronounced the lame
the same way. Adlee Rushman, Guy's gonna be a big star.
He keeps playing like that. He'll he'll he won't be
(26:53):
playing in Baltimore, He'll be playing for the Dodgers, of
the Yankees. Of the clubs are one of those great
sport baseball. Yeah, the Pirates won, Eddie, How about you?
He's such a party pooper. Alfie Alien Pinter says that
name the coach game with Eddie was great. Next time,
can we play the name all the Twitter accounts that
you've muted with Eddie? Oh wow ah, alf seems a
(27:18):
little upset that Eddie Garcia has muted his Alien account.
How does he know that? By the way, likely the
fact that you haven't responded to any of his comments
for several years. That I think that's part of the
reason why he got muted. Like with people who just
like tweet tweet tweet tweet, I just get sick of
seeing all their crap, like blind Scott. That's how come
I muted him. Blind Scott has threatened. I've seen the
(27:42):
emails he sent me over the years. Blind Scott, I
mean he's sent some wild stuff, like wild and crazy.
I don't get along with him, but I am not.
I don't need to see his online content. I'm good
on that. It is The Ben Mather Show. As we
continue on, and this portion the show brought to you
by you guessed it progresses venture its progressive makes Bundy
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(28:04):
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And let's say hello to Andrea. She's hanging out in Berkeley.
Her Oakland A's and New York Mets both won. She's
happy about that, but she's here to break down the
(28:25):
stars that are around a certain New York Met who's
down for the count to begin the year. Hello, Andrea,
a Benny Award winner, He gon, how are you? If
I was any better, I'd be a Lander, But not
Verlander because he's not fifting right now. He's out. Yes,
(28:46):
i'd say happy Opening Day, but not so much. If
you're a Mets fan, I'll tell you well, they won,
and as you know, Andrea, the Mets are the all
time winning his team on opening day. Mats dominate Opening Day. Yes,
good point, I did see that. Then, that was an
interesting stat But here's the thing with Verlander. He's born
(29:07):
February twentieth, nineteen eighty three and Saturn just went into Pisces,
and he's a Pisces. Saturn rules a skeletal system, bones, knees, teeth, joints.
So he's kind of downplaying this injury, but I don't
think he should. And there's just a cosmic double whammy
(29:29):
of Neptune in Pisces to his Mars, a crucial planet
for an athlete, rules, energy, assertion, aggression, So Neptune to
his Mars, and that's going to slow things down. So
he's on the il with a low grade strain of
the terrorist major, basically a muscle in the armpit area.
(29:49):
Nobody knows what that is. We just say the armpit.
It's just there's a muscle in your armpit and where
you put your deodorant. Actually people don't usually put their
deodor in there, but that's yeah, in that area. Yeah,
we're kind of keeping it simple for you know, regular people.
But you know, he said he's going to continue to
play cats, and we want to build up his arm
I think he's really downplaying this, and it scared well,
(30:10):
he is downplaying Andrea. But you know, and I know,
baseball players not exactly iron men. They do not and
they're not built out of Granted, if you know what
I'm saying, I do. And he's forty years old, I mean,
that's not old old, but in baseball terms, in the
real world, it's not old. But in the baseball world,
(30:31):
you're a dinosaur, right. And they signed him to two
years eighty six point seven million in the offseason to
pair them with Scherzer. That's as much as you're getting
right to call this show. Wouldn't that be nice? I agree,
I think they should. They should find a way to
pay you. Bad job by them. I'll tell you, Steve Code,
we really do need to have our paths cross here
(30:51):
because he I mean, I know he's got money to burn,
but this is just crazy the way he's just spending it.
If you could get a hold of Steam calling, yeah
that's all, you would be on the payroll and you'd
be making mid six figures minimum as an advisor to
the Mets. If you can get a hold of him,
tell him, yeah, he's on Twitter. I mean, I'll see
what I can do. I mean, he does seem to
(31:13):
reach out to fans. You got to sell the fact
that you're native New Yorker. You know, years of experience
dealing with this and you gotta sell you gotta sell it. Yeah. No,
that's good advice. Fan. I think, especially with the season
just starting, I think the more information the better. You know,
he's a Gemini, he seems to be open to information. Yeah,
(31:33):
I mean that would be good. You know, it's it's
just you know, we're used to having de Grom being
in church and now we've got Burlander, so you know,
it's definitely a buckle off. Buckle up. All right. I
gotta leave it there, Andrey, but thank you, all right,
virgo and service on Twitter and you can say hello
to Andrea. She is a Benny Award winner. Absolutely. We've
(31:56):
got Big Ben's lame jokes of the week, the best singers,
the best one liners, sent in by listeners like yourself
and a lot of funny people. Very lucky to do
this show, and very lucky that you listen. And you've
got a much better sense of humor than I have.
And you're kind enough to send me your jokes so
we can have some fun lame jokes of the week.
(32:16):
We get to it, we'll do it next. Fox Sports
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(32:40):
You're the special ingredient needed to influence others to join
our mysterious nocturnal platoon known as the Ben Maller Show.
A l I. I'm the tirerac dot com, Fox Sports
Radio Studios. It's Ben Maller. Knock knock, who's there? Blame week,
Blame Week two. It's Big Ben's lame joke of the week,
(33:02):
Lame jokes, lame jokes all the week. Man, let's get
the party started. As weed Man there in Miami. Hello,
weed Man, hippie, Hey Ben saying hello, Lisa, Hi, Lisa talk.
He's not talking weed Man. There's she's buying you new teeth,
(33:24):
weed Man, big news. Congratulation, Joe, You're you're getting new teeth.
Weed Man. No, Hey, why do you go to a
Marlins game? You go to a Marlins game for like
eight bucks. You should go to a Marlins game. You
don't have any bucks. Oh that's true. You don't have
any bucks, do you. I don't it from the mice. Yeah,
(33:46):
maybe they'll give it to you. Let's get to the jokes.
Why do you have? These are actual jokes sent in
by actual listeners. Why do you have to throw strikes
to Lizzo? I don't know why, Eddie. You cannot pitch
around her. You can't do it. That's ship our buddy
Chip in Maine, who sent that one in. Now this
one was submitted late, but I think it's kind of amusing.
(34:08):
Turns out, according to rob A, Lizzo had a very
impressive opening day. She actually hit multiple grand slams, Eddie,
Is that right? Yeah? Then she walked out of the
Dennis all right? Why is it an automatic run? Every
time Lizzo gets on base, I don't know why. Well,
(34:31):
she always rounds the basses, Eddie, she always rounds the basses.
Show there is that? Who is Lizzo's favorite? Ben Mallor
show regular caller. I don't know who's your favorite? Jed
who fed? Big fan? Big fan? That Lizzo has a
garden in her backyard. Big news that Lizzo's got a garden,
(34:54):
that is big news. Yes, she's calling it the olive
garden is what she's calling it. She likes to Bredi's fair.
That's Brendan from Boston who sent that one in Coop.
You got any jokes over there, Coop? No, okay. Why
is Lizzo getting married to a wide receiver? I don't
(35:14):
know why? Because Brandon cooks. That's that is a great joke.
Why did Lizzo break up with Whoopie Pie Blair in Maine?
I don't know. Why would you want to do that?
He's a he's a small friedy, that's what did What
(35:40):
did Hawaii say when Lizzo said she was coming over
for a private luow? Oh no, they said, We've never
dug a pit that big. They said, that's Comedia for
that one. And did you hear that Lizzo is imitating
(36:01):
the NBA to reduce her carb intake? Is that right? Yes?
And every meal she'll be practicing loaf management, Eddie, So
that's a good joke. That's Gordon into Coma who set
that one in these there Big Ben's lame jokes in
the week Time Now for the Mini weed Man Radio Roast,
(36:22):
Are you ready weed Man? Let's do it? Are you
honored that the people despise you so much? They send
jokes in every week and this guy Art says he
wrote it and says, you guys really need to stop
putting weed Man on the lame jokes. Oh why is that?
He says? He weed Man, you bring nothing? According to
this guy, what do you have to say to Art?
(36:42):
Weed Man alone? Okay, that's enough for me. Why did
they decide not to sell solar powered weed Man hippie dolls?
Why did rather? Why did they did they decide to
sell or not? Still don't know, I don't know why
(37:03):
would they do that? Well, they decided not to sell
solar powered weed Man hippie dolls because they didn't work Eddy,
So that's why they didn't. How helpless is weed Man?
I don't know how helpless is he? He is so
helpless that Jay Scoop has decided to leave the Ukraine
and instead fly to Miami to help him out. Alex.
(37:31):
Why is weed Man welcomed everywhere? I don't know. Why
is he welcomed everywhere? Because no matter where he goes,
he's always right at home. Alex the cynical Did you
know that weed Man is a no good, low life
sacker crap Eddie. Wow, I didn't I didn't know, no.
(37:53):
I just wanted to make sure you know that's from Tony.
That's Tony, all right. What do Lizzo and weed Man
have in common? I couldn't tell you. They both have
a foul Mouthittie a foul mouth. Did you hear that
that weed Did you hear that Eddie Murray? Eddie Murray
(38:15):
has the record for the most sack flies all time
in baseball. I heard you say that the other day.
On a related note, weed Man hippie has the record
for the most flies around his sack. So there is
that boy. Where can you find wheels that can help
you get away from the FTX lawsuits? That's tireshack dot
com Eddie from hurt. Thank you, weed Man. Lame jokes
(38:40):
in Loui
Hello and welcome. It's our number three, Hour three from
the audio Dojo. We break up the baseball talks or
for some little football football talk right now. And what
is your position on the Florida Gators quarterback Anthony Richardson,
who is said to have had a dazzling Pro Day
(00:22):
performance in front of NFL scouts. How do you explain
the over the top Pro Day coverage. There's a whole
cottage industry around the Pro Bowl or the Pro days,
these college pro days. And where do you see Anthony
Richardson being drafted? As we are heading into April this weekend,
the NFL Draft at the end of the month, where
(00:44):
do you see this cat being drafted? We'll get to
all of that and much more, including lame jokes of
the week here. It is our number three, the next
big Thing, if you buy the hype, the next big Thing.
Wel God, I'm in the beginning of another hour of
the Ben Maller Show. We are in the air everywhere
(01:08):
hob nubbers as we traverse the peaks and valley's coast
to coast, port, the border and beyond. On the vast
and wonderfully powerful microphones of fs are emanating live from
the cookware as we keep the pot boiling all night
under the cover of darkness and powered by moonlight. We
(01:31):
are broadcasting live from the tirac dot Com studios tirac
dot com. We'll help you get there and unmatched selection,
bast free shipping, free road hazard protection, and over ten
thousand or recommended installers ti iraq dot com. The way
tire buying should be talked A lot of baseball, but
(01:51):
our lead this hour comes from the NFL. We'll get
back to the baseball conversation in a bit, but we
know where our bread is buttered, and that is pigskin.
Our bread is buttered with pigskin. Now, the big story
bouncing around the echo chamber of football in the pigskin
world is out of Gainesville floor, the college campus of
(02:14):
the Florida Gators football team, their workout facility, and that
was the backdrop where Anthony Richardson worked out. Oh you're
not a draft nick if you don't know Anthony Richardson.
You're not a draft nerd if you don't know that name.
But he is the quarterback who did not play all
that well in college and now is being projected as
(02:35):
a first round pick. So if you didn't hear about this,
maybe not. I was sleeping when it happened, but I
was able to watch some of the clips online when
I woke up. We are told that Anthony Richardson not
only went out and worked out in his underwear for
NFL scouts, but he dazzled. He dazzled the onlookers at
the Gators indoor practice facility as he was slinging that football.
(03:00):
You're there and everywhere. There were three NFL head coaches
at least that were on hand. Frank Wright of the
Carolina Panthers, Pete Carroll of the Seahawks, and Doug Peterson
of Jacksonville were there. There were a bunch of high
falutin executives, general manager types, scouting types all over the place,
and they were all hanging out watching the workout of
(03:23):
not only the quarterback, but a bunch of other players
from Florida as well, mostly looking for that diamond in
the roof. You gotta find the diamond in the roof.
So let us discuss the question, what is your position
on Anthony Richardson's Wow Pro Day. I've got Whopper, seacrest
(03:45):
and charcuterie board and we'll combine all of these things
together and we are gonna make some hot talk. Hot talk.
That's what we're doing. So, first of all, we have
become numb to the Pro Day spectacles. This has become
a new thing. Each year, it gets bigger and bigger
and bigger and bigger, and eventually it's just going to
(04:08):
explode and they'll be large flying everywhere. It's wild to
me that these events still have the viral power and
seemingly get bigger and bigger and bigger in a pocket
of time this time of the year. Now, Anthony Richardson,
I have nothing against the guy. I don't know him.
(04:28):
His selling point, based on what I've been reading and
what I've been seeing, is athleticism size. He's got a
bazooka arm, possesses that rocket launcher, and you love it.
Throw the ball deep down the field in the carefully
choreographed ecosystem that is a Pro Day on a college campus. Richardson,
let it all hang loose. It's not worried about anything.
(04:51):
Certainly not would be defenders indoors at the Florida Gator's
practice facility and what I saw and everything that I've
been told than red he painted a masterpiece. It was
a Michaelangelo out there on the field that Richardson. Depending
on which report you believe the report, I believe, he
attempted sixty two passes in front of the scouts. He
completed fifty five of the sixty two. He was throwing
(05:15):
darts here, rainbow passes, dropping into the bread basket over there,
putting an exclamation point on his performance there as he
casually completed a seventy yard pass play and then did
some cart wheels down the field. Looked like there were
some cheerleaders there also. I don't know what they were
(05:35):
doing there, but he was tumbling like an all star.
So my reaction, whoop de damn dude, that is my reaction.
I am not impressed. I am not impressed, and I
rolled my eyes. I'll tell you why. It's the whopper.
It's the whopper on the boob tube. You never look
(05:59):
at a commercial for food. You don't because when you
get that food, it is nothing like the commercial. Like
I used to eat a ton of fast food back
in my big eaten days. The fast food menu items,
you know what I'm where I'm going with this. They're
notorious because you watch a commercial, you see an ad online,
(06:19):
they look delicious, and then when you go to the
drive through and you order the meal that you were
looking at on a website or on television, they let
you down one pc of the time. Why, well, it's
kind of obvious. They have food stylists. And there's some
really crazy videos on the YouTube on the internet if
(06:41):
you go down that rabbit hole on how they make
those commercials. And I've read some stories on this. I've
watched a number of those videos because I'm a loser
and I'm into that kind of stuff. How they market products.
And they use undercooked beef patties to make those fast
food burgers look so good and make them look moist
and plump, and they actually add the grill marks after
(07:04):
they cook the burger. They puff them up. The sesame
seed buns are not what you might think they are.
And they use sponges out of the microwave to create
steam to make it look like the burger steaming. And
they use toothpicks to place the lettuce and the tomato
and the pickles and all that in a certain way
(07:24):
so they look appetizing. All the tricks they use wax,
they mix in wax in the barbecue sauce, so it
has a little bit of a pop to it, but
the same with a pro day. The pro day is
wax in the barbecue sauce. It's a toothpick holding the
tomato and the pickle. That's what it is. There's no defense.
(07:45):
Everything is planned out. You're in your happy place. You're
in a place that you played college football and you
practiced every day. It's not indicative of real life. It's
not one of the ways I relate to this. Working
in the radio business, and we've been at Fox Sports
Radio for a very long time. In the early days
(08:08):
of Fox Sports Radio, they hired somebody to work at
this company who had the most amazing demo tape you
could possibly have. How do I know that? My boss
told me that they were bragging this person so amazing.
Oh my god, you know, I was like kind of
spitting a loogie in my face. The boss no longer
at the company, by the way, but they were like, oh,
this person is amazing, greatest demo I've ever seen, and
(08:30):
all that stuff. We hired this guy. Oh, mine's worked
in all these big cities. So they hired the guy
based on the demo tape the guy got to Fox
Sports Radio. He walked in is the single most famous
line ever stated in that building, the mothership of Fox
Sports Radio. He walks in, he looks at all the buttons,
He looks at all the different gadgets and gizmos and
(08:52):
what's your mccollets and thingamajigs that you have to know
how to use when you work at Fox Sports Radio.
He looked at all this and he compared it to
running the Space Shuttle. He compared it to the Space Shuttle.
But he had the greatest tape of all time. And
that's the way I look at these Pro days. It's like, yeah,
(09:13):
it's fine, but it's not based on anything that matters
to me. I'd rather see you dominate on the field
in college and then go out and suck in the
Pro day. I'd rather draft you that way than vice versa. Now, secondly,
how do you explain in general the over the top
Pro day coverage? So I call it star gazing? Isn't
(09:36):
what I call it? Not belly buddy button gazing? Star
gazing like Ryan Seacrest should work at the NFL network
as MC. It's American idol. The football version you're trying
to find the next superstar. You don't want to miss
out on the big shiny object at quarterback. You're willing
to overlook all the flaws, all the incomplete passes, all
(09:57):
the missed opportunities, the imperfections. Because Richardson is singing the
ball around against air inside a practice bubble in Florida,
and he wasn't perfect. He actually hit the roof of
the building with one of his throws. But let's see
him actually go out and replicate that in a game
against the Chiefs or the Bang Goals or the Bills.
(10:20):
You see, I'm Benny Buzzkill on this one. I'm Benny
Buzzkill on this one. We have seen too many players
over the years drafted because the scouts start wagging their tongues.
They're all excited. It's the measurables. It's the measurables. That's stupid. Dumb, dumb, dumb,
dumb dumb, dumb, dum dum dumb, that's what it is.
(10:42):
And then when the player arrives, they can't get it
done for a myriad of reasons when it actually matters.
And my examples are Zach Wilson, Johnny Manziel, who was
actually a good college player but had some quality workouts.
And jo Marcus Russell. That's old school JaMarcus Roll. So
what do I know? I just do the Overnight Show,
(11:03):
all right, final fun. So where do you see Anthony
Richardson being draft? Don't really care about the pro day.
Wasn't that good at Florida. I've seen stories saying that
he's going to be a top three pick in the draft.
I don't believe that. I believe he will be drafted
in the first round. It's far fetched to think that
he'll be a top five pick in the draft. At
(11:25):
this point. Based on the evidence that I have, Anthony
Richardson will be a top fifteen pick. And if you're
listening in Seattle, you might want to get out your
prayer beads. It sounds like the Seahawks are the most interested,
but Richardson's met with a number of teams, including the
Raiders and the Carolina Panthers, who have the number one
pick in the draft, and he will be the beneficiary
(11:49):
of a fundamental flaw in the NFL. They continue to
suffer from a supply chain issue at quarterback and the
way scouting work and We know this from watching our
football over the years and being meathead football fans. Anthony
Richardson is the football version of a charcutery board. He
(12:10):
is scouts look at a little bit of this, a
little bit of that, a whole lot of that. And
you look at a charcutery board. Usually they've got meats
and cheeses on there, but sometimes you've got fresh and
dried vegetables. You've got different kinds of nuts. Some people
like the olives. I don't like the olives. They've got
honeys and jams and all that, all that nonsense, but
(12:35):
that's what he is. He's a little bit of this,
a little bit out you. You'll imagine, if everything goes right,
this guy's gonna be a juggernaut. He's gonna be running
through people and running over people, and it's gonna be wild.
He's a little wooden sampler platter. Problem is, there's also
a warning label right there. It says buyer beware. Is
(12:56):
what it says, buyer beware, because Anthony Richardson is raw.
He's crude, only starting thirteen games, wobbly under live fire,
madly inaccurate. The most important skill is accuracy. This guy
is a scattershot quarterback, completed fifty three percent of his
(13:18):
passes in the Southeastern Conference, only attempted three hundred ninety
three total passes this entire time in Gainesville. But what
about the seventy yard throw? What about the body built
like Adonis? Because we all know watching the NFL for years,
that the most common throw in a regular season game
(13:41):
is a seventy yard hail mary down the field. It
is not a ten to twenty yard throw within ten
to twenty yards of the line of scrimmage, often within
five yards of the line of scrimmage, or throwing between
defensive players in the middle of the field. Those throws
never happened. It's always the seven five yard chuck it
(14:02):
and duck it. That's the most popular throw, unless not quite.
It's Ben Maller's show on Fox. You want to comment
on any of that, you can join us here at
eight seven seven ninety nine on Fox. That's eight seven
seven nine nine six six three six nine. Also on
Twitter at Ben mallor you can be part of the
show that's at Ben Maller and join the festivus of talk.
(14:26):
And we're on Twitter at Ben Maller. As I said,
that's at Ben Mallory. You can be part of the show.
That way. We've got lamb jokes the week coming up
a little bit later the hour. Time now for the
Mallor Riddle of the Day. And here it is Mallor
Riddle of the Day. Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis
Kelsey was recently asked to name all of the blank
(14:48):
and couldn't do it. Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis
Kelsey was asked recently to name all of the blank
and could not do it. Could not do it. That
is the Maller Riddle of the day. The answer will
(15:08):
get to it and we will do it next. Have guys,
I've had guys. What do they even mean? Be sure
to catch live editions of The Ben Maller Show weekdays
at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific on Fox Sports
Radio and the iHeartRadio. Hi Malla, Milicia, turn on your radio.
(15:39):
It's time to listen to the Man. Malasia's in the
air and everywhere, so don't be lame. I'm milogest comeling
sue when man begins to blow the show Stars. Mallor
(16:01):
joined the curious world of the Ben Maller show online.
It is pain free and easy to do. Just follow
your host on Twitter. He's at Ben Mallard and you
can tweet at and follow our technical producer. He plays
all the music and most of the funny soundbites in
the Ben Maller Show. Is first name is Roberto, his
last name is Flores. You can fall on Raider Underscore,
rob twenty four Hip, Hello, retirack dot com, Fox Sports
(16:26):
Radio Studios. It's Ben Mallor Philly. No Rash quit the
band will rash show up. I'm death the kids. May
Mallard meet and greet in the Minnesota. Will find out
sometimes hopefully you're nice to meet him. Time to pay
off the Mallor Riddle of the day, the malor riddle
(16:49):
of the day, and we'll get the calls you got
lame jokes later in the hour. Here's the malor riddle
of the day. Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelsey
was recently asked to name all the blank and couldn't
do it. Could not do it. That is the riddle
of the day. What is the answer? And let's see.
(17:10):
Eloy from Compton says, that's easy, big man. He didn't
know the last time the donkeys beat them, He says,
who else do we have? Page down? Page down? I
can't to read that. On the air, Bean boot Maker
Bob said all twenty six letters of the alphabet was
(17:30):
the problem. Rob in Vegas Kelsey could not name all
the members of One Direction? Who else? Page down? Page down?
Late Night Drug Tester says he could not name the
last guest on the fifth Hour podcast. Hey my fault man,
I don't book the guest. My man Danny. She likes
to just do the party. He does not want to
(17:50):
pook guest. Who else we have? Ferd Dog says the
answer to the Mallard riddle is all of the Ben
Mallers show callers. That That is the answer. Nick in
Wisconsin says, let's see here, can't read that. I said,
all right, he actually got he saw what I was
talking about. Bad job by him. Page down, page down.
(18:11):
Mallard prop guys says Travis. Kelsey could not name all
of the Fox Sports radio host update anchors, producers and
technical directors like Emmett the Blind Seahawk fan. Matt the
Warrior Radio Rays fan says. Kelsey was just asked to
name all of the steroids that he's taken. We could
not do it. That's a low blow. How dare you?
(18:33):
Donkey Sausage says he cannot name all the Fox Sports
radio host which I don't think I could name all
the Fox Sports radio hosts. And I work here page down,
a page down. A National Lampoon Movies guest by Rob
the Goatman in Iowa. Let's see we have all of
Santa's reindeer guests by Calligan Tim Greg the real estate
(18:57):
guy from Baltimore says Travis Kelsey was asked to name
all the colors of the rainbow and was unable to
pull that off. All the emojis on his phone. Guests
by Alf the Alien, Opiner, Shane and Demoine sist answer
all of the Mallar Militia to name all the Mallar Militia.
Was unable to do that. You can't read that. Teenage
(19:19):
mutant Ninja Turtles guests by disgruntled Viking Rube as his answer, Eddie,
do you have an answer, Eddie? Yes, he could not
name all of the Fast and Furious movies. That's impossible
to name. Nope, the correct answer. It turns out that
Travis Kelsey Hall of Fame tied end for your Kansas
City Chiefs. On his Fledgling podcast, was unable to name
(19:44):
all of the head coaches in the NFL. There was
that photo from the owners meetings this week in Arizona.
They had the coaches photo and Travis Kelsey, who's played
for the NFL for years, could not name all of
the coaches. Now. He said he's not good with names.
So his brother Jason Kelsey said, okay, just name name
(20:08):
the teams. He couldn't do that. He missed. You want
to take a guess, Eddie, how many teams he got wrong?
Out of the thirty two teams in the NFL, how
many coaches he got wrong? I'll say he got ten wrong?
Close he was? He was eight off. He got eight wrong.
He did not know the names of eight coaches in
the NFL. Do you know all the names of the
(20:29):
coaches in the NFL? Eddie? I think so? You do?
Right now? If you want me to quiz you? Sure?
All right? No, no, no, Roberto, make sure he's not cheating. Roberto,
no cheating? Are you looking at a coop? Here we
go on the spot rapid fire head coach of the
Arizona Cardinals, Eddie oh they got a new coach, damn it.
(20:52):
Who replaced Cliff Kingsburgh. Come on, Eddie, he is the
first one. That's a hard one. It is a hard one.
I'm is it is it. It's one of the Eagles guys, right,
it was one of the Eagles on this guy, Shane Steiken. No, no,
the other guy, the other guy, the other guy. Who's
the coach of the Bills. Oh McDermott, Sean McDermott, that's right,
(21:17):
all right, Cincinnati Bengals, Zach Taylor, you get oh, you
get that one. Cleveland Browns. Uh, Cleveland Browns. Yeah, I'll
see his face in. He's got the beard. It's got
the beard there. Uh crap, crap is crap the coach.
I know that one. Yeah, I know. I know it too. Coup.
(21:38):
I'm just he's blanking. I'm blanking on it. Viking assistant
who as a group, Yeah, Kevin Stefansky, that's right. Here's
the hard one. Eddie, the Boats of the Charge. Yeah,
that's uh, oh wait a minute, Bozo the clown. Yeah,
(22:00):
Oh my god, Eddie, Eddie, your wife, Eddie, Eddie the
team Eddie, Oh my god, Eddie's gonna you're gonna lose
your thunderstick privileges. I could see him in my head
right now. It does not help, Eddie. I could see him,
(22:22):
unfortunately doing that thing where he was on all fours. Oh,
by Eddie. Edie thinks wife doesn't listen to the show,
and I'm sure no one will let missus Garcia know that.
This is happy Eddie. You got five seconds, four second
(22:43):
on three seconds Staley game, Eddie, you have failed the game.
I picked the game Steelers, Eddie hardest one, Eddie. Coach
of the Patriots. Go ahead, Eddie, right now, I think
it's Bill Belichick now stopped trying a couple of years ago.
(23:06):
He gave up. And that ends our spur of the moment.
Name that coach game? How about hockey? Can we do hockey? Oh?
I couldn't name. I can name one coach in hockey,
the coach of the Flyers. They can do that. I
don't think I can name any Is John Tortorella the
coach of the Fires. Yeah, okay, that's about it. That's
(23:31):
my my hockey hockey. I used to be able to
name all the coaches, but that was long ago, in
a different life. It is the Ben Mallers Show. As
we press on and we'll take some calls. We also
have the lame jokes of the week. But right now,
let's get back over to Eddie Garcia. Get you caught
up on everything going on in the old overnight. Too
many names to remember? Whose names? Way too many names.
(23:54):
We used to have a game show about that. Yeah,
should we bring that back? No? I liked it, but
I mean, I don't know. I liked it, but the
problem was everybody sucked at it. Yes, Well, to be fair,
I mean, and it's even harder now. It hasn't. It's
not like it's gotten easier. It's even harder now than
it was when we did it. Be sure to catch
live editions of The Ben Maller Show weekdays at two
(24:16):
am Eastern eleven pm Pacific. Hi, this is Jay Glazer.
And you may know me for the world of football
or fighting or even shows like HBO's Ballers. Well you
don't know is for my entire life. I have lived
in something I referred to as the gray depression anxiety.
So now I'm coming out with a new podcast, Unbreakable,
a mental health podcast with Jay Glazer where each week,
(24:38):
while we talk about mental health. I hope to describe it,
give it words. Listen to Unbreakable with Jay Glazer on
the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
This from college football. They got prime fever apparently in Boulder, Colorado.
Apparently the spring football game for the University of Colorado
(25:00):
with their new head coach Deon Sanders, has been sold out.
Forty five thousand tickets to watch the spring game for Colorado.
Last year, less than two thousand fans attended these spring games,
so I guess they're really excited to see Dion with
a whistle and walk around on the sidelines. I can't
imagine why this would be. Colorado football sucked for twenty years,
(25:22):
so it's not like they've had anything good there in
Colorado football wise. They'll I understand showing up for the
real game, of course, but the spring game. Dion is
a marketing maven. The guy's going around wearing cowboy hats.
He's going to embrace the buffalo culture. Spend your time
to go out there and watch Dion walk around in
a cowboy hat. Yeah? Why not? Man? Okay, people got
(25:48):
a lot of free time. I guess I don't know.
What else are you gonna do something else other than
that guy in Baltimore is upset, Eddie is that he
wants you to make sure you learn how to pronounce
the name of the Orioles catcher because he says, this
guy's a big deal and with Lamar Jackson possibly leaving Baltimore,
my guy, yeah, Adlee Rushman is the guy's name, Eddie.
(26:09):
He's like, I told Coop to draft in his fantasy
keeper baseball league and he listens to me. See now
you're just bragging, Roberto, You're just bragging about your baseball.
He said on the highlight it was Rushman, not Rushman's
how they pronounced the highlight. I watched listen my guy
sports with Coleman is a maideman in Baltimore. Do you
understand this guy oozes Baltimore sports? He does a podcast
(26:33):
with Adam Jones, the old oriole player. That's how into
Baltimore sports. The guy is, okay, do you understand that
I'm just saying, not really, but okay. You do not
believe that this guy in Roberto both pronounced the lame
the same way. Adlee Rushman, Guy's gonna be a big star.
He keeps playing like that. He'll he'll he won't be
(26:53):
playing in Baltimore, He'll be playing for the Dodgers, of
the Yankees. Of the clubs are one of those great
sport baseball. Yeah, the Pirates won, Eddie, How about you?
He's such a party pooper. Alfie Alien Pinter says that
name the coach game with Eddie was great. Next time,
can we play the name all the Twitter accounts that
you've muted with Eddie? Oh wow ah, alf seems a
(27:18):
little upset that Eddie Garcia has muted his Alien account.
How does he know that? By the way, likely the
fact that you haven't responded to any of his comments
for several years. That I think that's part of the
reason why he got muted. Like with people who just
like tweet tweet tweet tweet, I just get sick of
seeing all their crap, like blind Scott. That's how come
I muted him. Blind Scott has threatened. I've seen the
(27:42):
emails he sent me over the years. Blind Scott, I
mean he's sent some wild stuff, like wild and crazy.
I don't get along with him, but I am not.
I don't need to see his online content. I'm good
on that. It is The Ben Mather Show. As we
continue on, and this portion the show brought to you
by you guessed it progresses venture its progressive makes Bundy
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(28:04):
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And let's say hello to Andrea. She's hanging out in Berkeley.
Her Oakland A's and New York Mets both won. She's
happy about that, but she's here to break down the
(28:25):
stars that are around a certain New York Met who's
down for the count to begin the year. Hello, Andrea,
a Benny Award winner, He gon, how are you? If
I was any better, I'd be a Lander, But not
Verlander because he's not fifting right now. He's out. Yes,
(28:46):
i'd say happy Opening Day, but not so much. If
you're a Mets fan, I'll tell you well, they won,
and as you know, Andrea, the Mets are the all
time winning his team on opening day. Mats dominate Opening Day. Yes,
good point, I did see that. Then, that was an
interesting stat But here's the thing with Verlander. He's born
(29:07):
February twentieth, nineteen eighty three and Saturn just went into Pisces,
and he's a Pisces. Saturn rules a skeletal system, bones, knees, teeth, joints.
So he's kind of downplaying this injury, but I don't
think he should. And there's just a cosmic double whammy
(29:29):
of Neptune in Pisces to his Mars, a crucial planet
for an athlete, rules, energy, assertion, aggression, So Neptune to
his Mars, and that's going to slow things down. So
he's on the il with a low grade strain of
the terrorist major, basically a muscle in the armpit area.
(29:49):
Nobody knows what that is. We just say the armpit.
It's just there's a muscle in your armpit and where
you put your deodorant. Actually people don't usually put their
deodor in there, but that's yeah, in that area. Yeah,
we're kind of keeping it simple for you know, regular people.
But you know, he said he's going to continue to
play cats, and we want to build up his arm
I think he's really downplaying this, and it scared well,
(30:10):
he is downplaying Andrea. But you know, and I know,
baseball players not exactly iron men. They do not and
they're not built out of Granted, if you know what
I'm saying, I do. And he's forty years old, I mean,
that's not old old, but in baseball terms, in the
real world, it's not old. But in the baseball world,
(30:31):
you're a dinosaur, right. And they signed him to two
years eighty six point seven million in the offseason to
pair them with Scherzer. That's as much as you're getting
right to call this show. Wouldn't that be nice? I agree,
I think they should. They should find a way to
pay you. Bad job by them. I'll tell you, Steve Code,
we really do need to have our paths cross here
(30:51):
because he I mean, I know he's got money to burn,
but this is just crazy the way he's just spending it.
If you could get a hold of Steam calling, yeah
that's all, you would be on the payroll and you'd
be making mid six figures minimum as an advisor to
the Mets. If you can get a hold of him,
tell him, yeah, he's on Twitter. I mean, I'll see
what I can do. I mean, he does seem to
(31:13):
reach out to fans. You got to sell the fact
that you're native New Yorker. You know, years of experience
dealing with this and you gotta sell you gotta sell it. Yeah. No,
that's good advice. Fan. I think, especially with the season
just starting, I think the more information the better. You know,
he's a Gemini, he seems to be open to information. Yeah,
(31:33):
I mean that would be good. You know, it's it's
just you know, we're used to having de Grom being
in church and now we've got Burlander, so you know,
it's definitely a buckle off. Buckle up. All right. I
gotta leave it there, Andrey, but thank you, all right,
virgo and service on Twitter and you can say hello
to Andrea. She is a Benny Award winner. Absolutely. We've
(31:56):
got Big Ben's lame jokes of the week, the best singers,
the best one liners, sent in by listeners like yourself
and a lot of funny people. Very lucky to do
this show, and very lucky that you listen. And you've
got a much better sense of humor than I have.
And you're kind enough to send me your jokes so
we can have some fun lame jokes of the week.
(32:16):
We get to it, we'll do it next. Fox Sports
Radio has the best sports talk lineup in the nation.
Catch all of our shows at Foxsports Radio dot com
and within the iHeartRadio app search FSR to listen live
calling all Mallard Militia foot soldiers. We need your helping
hand to gain new recruits by posting and tagging Mallard
Show related contents on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and all social networks.
(32:40):
You're the special ingredient needed to influence others to join
our mysterious nocturnal platoon known as the Ben Maller Show.
A l I. I'm the tirerac dot com, Fox Sports
Radio Studios. It's Ben Maller. Knock knock, who's there? Blame week,
Blame Week two. It's Big Ben's lame joke of the week,
(33:02):
Lame jokes, lame jokes all the week. Man, let's get
the party started. As weed Man there in Miami. Hello,
weed Man, hippie, Hey Ben saying hello, Lisa, Hi, Lisa talk.
He's not talking weed Man. There's she's buying you new teeth,
(33:24):
weed Man, big news. Congratulation, Joe, You're you're getting new teeth.
Weed Man. No, Hey, why do you go to a
Marlins game? You go to a Marlins game for like
eight bucks. You should go to a Marlins game. You
don't have any bucks. Oh that's true. You don't have
any bucks, do you. I don't it from the mice. Yeah,
(33:46):
maybe they'll give it to you. Let's get to the jokes.
Why do you have? These are actual jokes sent in
by actual listeners. Why do you have to throw strikes
to Lizzo? I don't know why, Eddie. You cannot pitch
around her. You can't do it. That's ship our buddy
Chip in Maine, who sent that one in. Now this
one was submitted late, but I think it's kind of amusing.
(34:08):
Turns out, according to rob A, Lizzo had a very
impressive opening day. She actually hit multiple grand slams, Eddie,
Is that right? Yeah? Then she walked out of the
Dennis all right? Why is it an automatic run? Every
time Lizzo gets on base, I don't know why. Well,
(34:31):
she always rounds the basses, Eddie, she always rounds the basses.
Show there is that? Who is Lizzo's favorite? Ben Mallor
show regular caller. I don't know who's your favorite? Jed
who fed? Big fan? Big fan? That Lizzo has a
garden in her backyard. Big news that Lizzo's got a garden,
(34:54):
that is big news. Yes, she's calling it the olive
garden is what she's calling it. She likes to Bredi's fair.
That's Brendan from Boston who sent that one in Coop.
You got any jokes over there, Coop? No, okay. Why
is Lizzo getting married to a wide receiver? I don't
(35:14):
know why? Because Brandon cooks. That's that is a great joke.
Why did Lizzo break up with Whoopie Pie Blair in Maine?
I don't know. Why would you want to do that?
He's a he's a small friedy, that's what did What
(35:40):
did Hawaii say when Lizzo said she was coming over
for a private luow? Oh no, they said, We've never
dug a pit that big. They said, that's Comedia for
that one. And did you hear that Lizzo is imitating
(36:01):
the NBA to reduce her carb intake? Is that right? Yes?
And every meal she'll be practicing loaf management, Eddie, So
that's a good joke. That's Gordon into Coma who set
that one in these there Big Ben's lame jokes in
the week Time Now for the Mini weed Man Radio Roast,
(36:22):
Are you ready weed Man? Let's do it? Are you
honored that the people despise you so much? They send
jokes in every week and this guy Art says he
wrote it and says, you guys really need to stop
putting weed Man on the lame jokes. Oh why is that?
He says? He weed Man, you bring nothing? According to
this guy, what do you have to say to Art?
(36:42):
Weed Man alone? Okay, that's enough for me. Why did
they decide not to sell solar powered weed Man hippie dolls?
Why did rather? Why did they did they decide to
sell or not? Still don't know, I don't know why
(37:03):
would they do that? Well, they decided not to sell
solar powered weed Man hippie dolls because they didn't work Eddy,
So that's why they didn't. How helpless is weed Man?
I don't know how helpless is he? He is so
helpless that Jay Scoop has decided to leave the Ukraine
and instead fly to Miami to help him out. Alex.
(37:31):
Why is weed Man welcomed everywhere? I don't know. Why
is he welcomed everywhere? Because no matter where he goes,
he's always right at home. Alex the cynical Did you
know that weed Man is a no good, low life
sacker crap Eddie. Wow, I didn't I didn't know, no.
(37:53):
I just wanted to make sure you know that's from Tony.
That's Tony, all right. What do Lizzo and weed Man
have in common? I couldn't tell you. They both have
a foul Mouthittie a foul mouth. Did you hear that
that weed Did you hear that Eddie Murray? Eddie Murray
(38:15):
has the record for the most sack flies all time
in baseball. I heard you say that the other day.
On a related note, weed Man hippie has the record
for the most flies around his sack. So there is
that boy. Where can you find wheels that can help
you get away from the FTX lawsuits? That's tireshack dot
com Eddie from hurt. Thank you, weed Man. Lame jokes
(38:40):
in Loui
Host
Ben Maller
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