August 16, 2024 • 39 mins
Ben Maller talks about Rob Manfred's plans to mandate MLB starters go six innings, Bryce Harper calling the Phillies play unacceptable during a team meeting, Lame Jokes of the Week, and much more!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello and welcome. It's our dum number three. As we
sneak around in the middle of the night recording this
podcast limited limited commercial eruption. So here in our number
three talking bays Baul, what do you make of Commissioner
Rob Manford's plan to mandate MLB starters goes six innings
(00:23):
a mandate a rule. Bryce Harper called the Phillies play
recently unacceptable while holding a team meeting. Will this solved
the problems in the Delaware Valley? And Dave Roberts Dodgers
they're leading the Nation League West is down to just
two games? Is it panic time in La La Land.
(00:43):
We'll get to that as well. And lame jokes of
the week coming your way right now. It's our number three.
We'll call it the deep six. That's what we're gonna
call it. Welcome. In the beginning of another hour of
the Ben Malor Show. We are in the air everywhere,
(01:05):
slithering in the night, as we shine a light on
the night, coast to coast, border, the border and beyond
on the vast and missiously powerful microphones of FSR emmanating
live from the cast. Not broadcasting, it's witch casting. We're
(01:26):
broadcasting live from the tyrack dot com studios. Tyract dot
com will help you get there and unmatched selection, fast,
free shipping, free road hazard protection and over ten thousand
recommended in stars. Tyract dot com. The way tire buying
should be a know Gumby Dave back very active on
social media. Gumby Dave very active, and he's always liked
(01:50):
round numbers and the number ten thousand, round number, round number.
He likes it a lot. But our lead this we
will blame jokes coming up later in the hour, but
our lead this hour. Headline from Park Avenue, Midtown, Manhattan,
Concrete Jungle, A big shakeup is being considered in the
Big League. Now, if you didn't hear about this, maybe
(02:13):
you were busy living your life and not obsessing with
this nonsense. Perhaps you missed it. So the streets have
been talking here, and what are they saying. They're telling
us that Major League Baseball is contemplating a six inning requirement,
a six inning requirement for starting pitchers. Now, let me
repeat that for those of you that are bad at hearing.
(02:37):
Maybe in the back of the room there you're hearing
aid isn't working Like Angry Bill. Major League Baseball is
exploring a rule change that will mandate a starting pitcher
goes six innings, not five innings, not four innings, six innings.
They claim the mandate is to quote restore the prestige
(02:59):
of the star pitcher, among other on field goals Baseball
has put in recent years, things like the ghost Runner,
the three batter minimum for relief pitchers, the extra wildcard team.
We can go on on all right, So let us
discuss the question what do you make of Commissioner Rob
Manford's plan to mandate that Major League Baseball starters go
(03:24):
six innings? So I've got Scotch tape, window dressing, and
Bob Ross, and we will combine all of these things
together and we are going to make a leap of faith,
is what we're going to do. So first of all,
I'm gonna begin with this. My first thought is that
Rob Manford is obsessed with futzing around with the game,
(03:48):
that he does not believe the game is good, he
does not believe the product is good, and he is
help bent on changing. And what he's really doing, though,
is towing to television because the TV people complain about
these things, and Rob Manfer is like, well that's the
gold thing. I get why he's doing it from a
(04:09):
pure business standpoint. If television says we don't want baseball anymore,
then that's it. That is the death of baseball. So
he wants to build a better mouse trap when the
mousetrap they have is fine. But my position on the
sixth inning rule, the six inning rule for starting pitchers,
(04:31):
I am ambivalent on this. I have mixed emotions because
here's why I agree with the premise that Major League
Baseball needs to go MSPGA. MSPGA make starting pitchers great again.
They need to make starting pitchers great again. It's better
for the business, it's better for television, it's an easier
(04:51):
sport to sell, and Baseball for its entire history, up
until the last ten fifteen years, had always position itself
around the starting pitcher. They were just a little more
important than every other player. They were the headliners on
the Broadway show. And every sport has that. Baseball does
(05:14):
not because of the nerds. Nobody wants to talk about
that part. But it's because of big data, right, analytics
and spreadsheets and trying to get a competitive match. That
is why they have killed this. That's it right in
you look at the marketing of sports, the hype men
(05:35):
of sports boxing for so long massive back in the day.
Now it's MMA, But when boxing was in its a
day and they were dominating, you tuned in because obviously
it was the big name fighters. It was if any
how old you are, Muhammad Ali or you know the
Mike Tyson and Ander Holyfield era, it mattered. It meant right,
(06:02):
not as much anymore as well the only ones in
the ring. Of course it met something. But the whole
marketing concept is based on trying to make things a spectacle,
make it more important. In the NFL, when you get
ready for an NFL game, you're not getting ready for
the Chiefs and the Bengals. You're getting ready for Mahomes
versus Burrow. They're above the headline there. And in the
(06:28):
NBA it's Nikola Jokic the Joker versus Steph Curry and
then the Warriors, right, they're the people that moved the
needle and everything else is subterfuge. And for years baseball
was like that. It was big time starting pitchers and
you I remember when back in my day that you
(06:48):
looked forward to matchups because you knew it was going
to be good, and guys had to go. In those days,
they pitched six or seven innings and you were called
a was and you were emasculated if you didn't go
that far into a game. Nowadays it's the opposite. People
look at you like you're some kind of freak of nature,
like you're you're some kind of lizard person. If you
(07:10):
go into the seventh inning, like what is wrong with you?
You're making the rest of us look bad. It reminds
me of when I used to go on the baseball
beat back in the day, and they had this thing
called the major league jog. We're very popular in the
nineties when I was around baseball, and the major league
jog is when you're an established major league player and
(07:31):
you hit a ball like a fly ball that you're
pretty confident is going to be an out. You don't
hustle right now, you don't walk, but you don't run.
They call it the major league jog. And then, but
it never really happens. There'll be some hot shot minor
league guy that'll come up back in those days, or
maybe it was somebody who was like a lifetime minor
(07:51):
leaguer who got a taste at the show. And they'd
come up and they'd run like gangbusters, and they would
be scolded by the other players because you're making us
look bad. Now, when a starting pitcher goes late in
a game, it's like, what's wrong with you, dude? Come on, man,
one hundred pitches? You need ice? One hundred pitches? Why well,
(08:12):
some guy in the eighties decided one hundred pitches was
all the human body could allow. God forbid, no, you
know back, you know for Nado Valenzuela through like two
hundred pitches in the game, Levon Hernandez in Cuba, the
legend is through like three hundred and fifty pitches in
a day in Cuba, and going on. Now, I've going
on anyway, Bajor League Baseball has lost its way because
(08:32):
of the nerds. They've marginalized the starting pitcher. Now we
disagree though, with the way Rob Manford is planning undoing,
and this is my position. Much like the shift. They
banned the shift. I was against that these things should
happen organically. It should be a market correction. You should
not have government oversight. This is just bureaucracy. It's scotch tape,
(08:55):
but it's red tape and masking tape. You're masking the problem,
the under lying condition in baseball. League officials have added
all of these fugazy rules in recent years. Right, But
even this, there's always the exemption, the exemption for this
as well. The pitcher suffers an injury, they don't have
to go six obviously, if they throw more than one
(09:17):
hundred pitches, you don't have to go six innings. If
you allow four or more earned runs, you are allowed
to take the picture out. So it opens up the
door for what if the exemption is Hey, if you're
suffering from an injury, all of a sudden, flopping will
come to baseball for pitching. Right, Oh my aching back,
(09:39):
Oh my knee, my back, my knee and my back.
All right? Yes. Secondly, great movie Friday, wonderful movie. All right. Secondly,
we fly into Philadelphia, where the Phillies have recently been
a suck back team. Actually the last couple days they've won,
but they inspired a recent team meeting MVP Bryce Harper
did not did not hold back, did not bite his tongue.
(10:02):
He addressed the comodo dragon in the room, or what
did he say? The recent performance of the fight in
Phils who haven't shown much fight said, it's been unacceptable.
That's the money quote, Bryce Harper calling the Phillies performance
on the field unacceptable while holding a team meeting a clubhouse.
Pow wow. Will this solve the problem in the Delaware Valley?
(10:27):
So i'n't answer this by using algebra N plus zero
equals no. The player's only meeting a staple of slumping
teams from sea to shining sea. You do it. It's
a thing you do. You know, they have the circle
(10:48):
of life. Like you're born, You go to school right
because society expects that, and then you find someone to
spend your life with, You get married, you get your career,
then you retire and you die. That's like the circle
a live well. In this case, the circle of slumping
teams is team meeting, team meeting. It has remained in
(11:11):
enduring tradition over the years. It's always window dressing. You
never hear about player only meetings when things are going well.
It's only something that happens when you stink, right, And
this is an effort by Bryce Harper and the Phillies
to keep the angry fans and media at bay. That's
the effort here. It's the old well, maybe this will
(11:32):
help and this will shut them up. We're trying. You
can't be upset with us. We're trying. Now. The Phillies,
even with this bad play the last month, are still
in really good shape because they're tremendously talented, and the
Mets and Braves have been like jackwagons over this same
period of time. All right, final thought. After the bullpen
(11:54):
blew a late lead in Milwaukee on Thursday afternoon, Dave
Rob's Dodgers find themselves falling apart. Their National League West
lead is down to just two games? Is it panic
city in La La Land? So I'm shaking my head. No,
(12:18):
you can't see me. And if you can't see me,
you're a stalker. And I'm gonna call the cops. This
is a Bob Ross special. It's a happy little accident.
I am Benny Brightside on the Doyers. I want to
see them keep losing. I do. I'm not you guys
(12:39):
keep trying to you know, bust my balls. You're sending
me these messages. I see them. Here's why I believe
it's a good thing. It's a blessing in disguise. In
recent years, the Dodgers have coasted into the postseason. Last
couple of years. They have been on cruise control, on
auto pilot going into the playoffs, and then the playoffs
(12:59):
have started the last couple of years, and what do
they do. They have first class seats on the vomit
comet in the postseason. So I'm happy that the Padres
and the Demon Diamondbacks, teams that have beaten them by
the way in recent years in the playoffs, are holding
them accountable. That's good. I would like to see the
Dodgers barely get in the playoffs as a wildcard team.
(13:21):
Bring on the boiling cauldron. I can't go to Dodgers
Stadium anymore. I got banned anyway because of Atani, So fine,
I don't care. I'm not gonna go to those games anyway.
Let them play on the road. Part of me wants
the Dodgers again just to barely get in the playoffs
as that last wildcard team in the National League. Have
to have every disadvantage in the world because they're going
(13:41):
to have to win high pressure games and that's what
you have to do in the playoffs. And by the way,
it is a win win situation for me, because either
they figure this thing out and they go on a run,
they get back to a World Series, win another championship,
or this goes sideways and upside down and there's upheaval
in La La Land, and Dave Roberts finally becomes the
(14:04):
fall guy because they got to get rid of some way.
If the Dodgers don't make the playoffs, are barely getting
the playoffs and losing the first round, someone's going to
lose their job. And why not Dave Roberts. We really
liked them in that spot. So they either win or
Dave Roberts is gone. It is the Ben Mallor Show.
If you'd like to be part of this, you can
(14:25):
join the conversation right now. Speak easy rules are in effect.
I realized we tease the story. We got to carry
it away on something last night. We didn't get to it,
so we'll we'll circle back to that, the story about
a baseball team who's getting absolutely ripped here for someone
who they honored put above everyone else in society, and
some members of society are a little upset by that.
(14:46):
We love those type of stories. Time now for the
Mallor reddle Love Today, And here is the Mallor really
Love Today. A Cowboys coach Mike McCarthy. Mike McCarthy says
he believes that Micah Parsons it would blank again. Cowboys
head coach Mike McCarthy recently said he believes that Mike
(15:07):
Micah Parsons could blank. That is the malord. Really love
today the answer. We'll get to it. We'll do it next.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Maller
Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific on
Fox Sports Radio and the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
Hey, what's up everybody?
Speaker 3 (15:25):
It's me three time pro bowler LeVar Arrington and I
couldn't be more excited to announce a podcast called Up
on Game?
Speaker 1 (15:32):
What is Up on Game?
Speaker 3 (15:33):
You asked, along with my fellow pro bowler TJ. Huschman
Zada and Super Bowl champion Yup, that's right, Plexico Burrs.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
You can only name a show with that type of
talent on it. Up on Game.
Speaker 3 (15:46):
We're going to be sharing our real life experiences loaded
with teachable moments. Listen to Up on Game with Me,
LeVar Arrington, TJ. Hutschman, Zada, and Plexico Burrs on the
iHeartRadio app, Apple Pop or wherever you get your podcast
from The.
Speaker 4 (16:05):
Ben Maler Show is a collaborative effort. You're invited to
communicate with those of us on this side of the microphones.
You can follow your host on x he's at Ben
Maller and you could tweet at our technical producer Mark,
who's in for LORAYNH. He's either not on social media
or he doesn't want you to know where he is
on social media. And now I from the tyrack dot
(16:27):
Com Fox Sports Radio Studios.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
It's Ben Maller, lamb jokes coming up later this hour.
Do we need a fake weed Man or is the
real weed Man going to show up? Inquiring minds would
like to know. We'll find out.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
What's the latest on him. Do we have the latest?
Speaker 1 (16:43):
Yeah, he's out a well. Last I checked, he was
out of jail.
Speaker 4 (16:46):
Okay, but there were a couple of people that supposedly
were gonna help Mount.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
Is he contacting them? Well, I here's the problem. I've
tried calling weed Man and either I don't have his
number anymore or I don't know what's going on. He's
not answered his phone, so maybe I have an old number.
I thought I had a new number. It's hard to
keep track do.
Speaker 4 (17:06):
You think he really wants help, because every time we
try and get him some help, it's somehow mysteriously doesn't work.
Speaker 1 (17:13):
But we did get him a place to stay, and
and he sabotaged that. Yeah, he called the cops and
then there was a big you know, to do or whatever.
But he claimed he was in the right on that.
But he did move in with the person that they
gave him the room. So there were some friends of
the show that we're like, hey, I got I got
a place. And weed Man's always been I only want
to live in Miami, and I want to live like
(17:34):
Fort Lauderdale or lower and I don't want to go
any further north north. And he's got like all these
rules about Miami.
Speaker 4 (17:40):
Well it makes sense for a homeless guy to have
a list of demands.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
Yes, it's the beauty of weed Man.
Speaker 5 (17:48):
So I was thinking about this when driving in, and
I was like, because the last we talked to him,
we mentioned something about him coming out here in California
and just living on the streets out here in California,
because you know, it's plenty of homeless communities. Uh, And
I thought, well, you know, it wouldn't be too hard
I'm sure if we set something up, like, you know,
how much is one way ticket from Miami to LA,
(18:10):
Like it's not that much, you know, get you know,
several people to pitch in five bucks. You get there
in no time. But then I was thinking, how, you know,
would he be happy out here? And I was like,
what does he do with his day? Does he have
a bunch of homeless friends? Would he miss his homeless friends?
Does he who does he talk to? Is it just
is he just on the phone with Lisa all day long?
Speaker 1 (18:31):
Yeah? I mean there's a lot of layers to it.
I mean, because you've got that he wouldn't know anybody.
He does seem like a very social guy and like
he's not an introvert, he's an extroverts. So there's that.
The other problem is if we bloomed to La, he
would he would his home would be right outside the studio,
Like he would be there. Yeah, I'm not exactly he'd
be like okay.
Speaker 5 (18:51):
No, I know, but I feel like that would be great,
that it'd be funny for for a while, But he would.
Speaker 4 (18:56):
Want to be in here all the time, right, he'd
out and want weed man hanging out.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
But if we had a bad segment, but like, let's
get weed Man, you know, we'll call it. We'll bring
him out, get him outside, We'll bring.
Speaker 5 (19:09):
Him in and be wonderful, right like, as long as
he doesn't fall asleep on my desk.
Speaker 4 (19:13):
It's uh, he could.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
Have drunk and yeah, okay, all right, Well hopefully we'll
hear from weed maned before he is not called in
and who maybe you can give me the number you
gave me last time, because the number I have on
my phone, I tried to call him, he's it does
not seem like it's his phone, so I have to
scroll back through. Okay, well that would take a fair
amount of time, I understand, but I don't have his
number anyway. Here's the it appears I don't have his
(19:38):
number because he's not answered his phone. I've tried to
contact him. Here's the who am I game? Or nothing?
Who am I him? The Mallard riddle of to day? Uh.
Cowboys coach Mike McCarthy says he believes that his star
defensive player Micah Parsons could blank. That is the Mallor
riddle of the day. What is the answer? Roll skate backwards?
A roller skate backwards? Was guessed by somebody lost their name.
(20:01):
He'd he'd be a great water boy from Milkman. Mike,
who else do we have? Page down? Page down? I
can't read that one on the air. Etch a sketch,
etch a sketch him on the sidelines between plays. Guessed
by Malo Probably that's pretty good, pretty good app thing
(20:22):
he got their fer dog from the OC says could
break dance better than Olympic gold medalist Raygun. Who else
do we have? Make the Baba gonoosh from Asher Sewn
and Portland said rollerscape backwards? Eat raw beef from the
King Rory believes that Michah Parsons could be a conspiracy theorist.
(20:43):
Guessed by Alf the Alien, O Pinter Eke and Roseuo,
Minnesota said eat a horse. Mike McCarthy believes Micah Parsons
can jump on a pogo stick while eating an apple fritter.
I need to get an apple fritter. Those things aren't
those good, Michael, Those apple fritters, I haven't had one
amount of time. Man, They're great, well made apple fritter awesome.
(21:04):
And donuts are like fast food. I was I was
trying to explain this to my my wife. She brought
home some donuts and I was like, I'm not eating those.
Those have been sitting around a donut. Every minute a
donut sits after it's made. Donut our friend Donut Kelly
can tell you about this, but every minute that goes by,
the quality of the donut goes down.
Speaker 4 (21:26):
Well, I think, weren't you the one that said just
pop it in the microwave for a couple of seconds.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
Well you can't, but it's it's it's that that's the
only way I would eat it. It does bring it
back to life. But even that is not the original.
How am I a.
Speaker 4 (21:41):
Diva that's only fresh baked donuts for King Malar?
Speaker 1 (21:45):
Well, that's because let me let me tell you why.
When I was doing local radio, we did a remote
at the largest Winchels donut shop and I think they
were calling themselves the largest donut shop in the country.
Speaker 4 (22:00):
Largest, Yes, like two stories.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
They produced the most donuts per hour at that time.
That was their whole marketing. They had us out there
to do remote so that the guy that ran the
donut shop, he'd like, take the donuts right off the
conveyor belt thing they had and here have some donuts.
Speaker 4 (22:18):
That is so.
Speaker 1 (22:19):
I mean, you've had that.
Speaker 4 (22:20):
I understand that. I can understand that, But that doesn't
mean that you know you're gonna swear off donuts for
the rest of your life unless they're off a convey
conveyor belt right into your mouth.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
Well, you know, I have to keep my my model
looks at he here's the here's the answer on the
roof of the day. Found it? Oh you found it? Good? Okay, good?
I send that over on the answer, No, he found
weed man's numbers. Okay, what's the answer, Eddie? I don't
know you all right. Cowboys coach Mike McCarthy says he
believes Michael Parsons could probably play running back in the
(22:51):
n f L. Couldn't play running he said it. He
said that, But he says that don't expect him to
get many carries because if Michael Parsons got hurt, he said,
running the ball, he said, I would just walk out
of the front gate and keep walking. Mike McCarthy said,
So that is the answer to the Malle riddle. And
the New York Mets are being roasted because they honored
(23:15):
someone who well but a viral star was given one
of the highest honors you can get as a fan
threw out the first pitch. You see, who threw out
the first pitch of the Mets game?
Speaker 4 (23:27):
Eddie was Was it the fry guy this time or something?
Speaker 2 (23:30):
Hand?
Speaker 1 (23:31):
Before they had Grimace, they honored the Hawk to a girl. No, yes,
how did she do? She spit all over that thing.
Haley Welch is her name, and so the Mets they
moved on from Grimace to the Hawk to a girl.
She threw out the first pitch. And this has caused
(23:53):
an uproar in New York because the Metropolitans. I guess
they wanted to honor her oral can eddication skills. But uh,
they're they're getting they're getting ripped apart here, like what
are you doing? You're a joke and all that.
Speaker 4 (24:05):
No.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
I thought it was funny, but I'm not a Mets fan.
And one of the beat writers for the Mets, for
the guy that works for Newsday, said they were not
allowed to mention the Hawk tour girl in the story.
Apparently she's banned from Newsday. Like who the hell's reading
Newsday anyway? But the beat writers said, can't. I can't
do it. And so if the Mets continue to lose.
(24:29):
Are they going to blame the Hawk tour girl because
they credited Grimace when they were playing well? But lately
they have not played that well. They have not well.
Speaker 4 (24:37):
They did blow a five nothing lead.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Yeah, I guess the Oakland Athletics. My god, let's go
to the international line real quick, Eddie, the international line.
I know Thomas in Sydney. Hello, Thomas, Yes, welcome, Number
one has returned.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
Just missed them all? Lash my king?
Speaker 1 (24:58):
Hello, Hello, I'm king, Eddie. You don't respect me like
a king. This guy respects me like a king. This
Thomas guy. Yes, Edward the third the one that goes
beheaded or something. Yeah, very well, they all got beheaded
back in the day. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
Yeah, how are you doing with that? How you doing
with the weed men?
Speaker 4 (25:16):
There?
Speaker 2 (25:17):
Come find him yet?
Speaker 1 (25:19):
Yeah, we can't find We have a number, so I'm
gonna try to call him. But you want to be
a fake weed man?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Do you know what? Take it? Tom? Sounds good?
Speaker 4 (25:28):
Costs too much money for him to stay on hold though?
Speaker 1 (25:30):
For that one, well, I'll give me up. I mean
it is gonna be expensive where it's not toll free
from Australia, So do you want to you want to
do it? Or do you wanna hang up?
Speaker 2 (25:38):
I'll do it, dudes.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
All right, he's this guy's in it, Thomas. We're big
in Sydney, Eddie. We play well in Sydney.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
Beautiful city.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Have you?
Speaker 1 (25:49):
I've never been there. I like to go.
Speaker 4 (25:51):
That's awesome. I would love to go.
Speaker 1 (25:54):
Too expensive. See, everyone can play in California. Yeah, okay.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Be sure to catch live editions of The Best Maller
Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific.
Speaker 4 (26:03):
And with our Australian listener on hold, we give you this.
Australian breakdancer Ray Gun says she is devastated by the
backlash she has received from her Olympic routine. She said, quote,
I worked my butt off preparing for the Olympics and
gave it my all, truly end quote.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
All right, very good there, Eddie. I did call the
weed man and he did not answer the phone, although
he did send me a text from that numbers, so
maybe he's unless somebody took his phone.
Speaker 4 (26:36):
I don't know what did this text say?
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Who is this?
Speaker 4 (26:40):
Oh that's not a good sign.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
Uh no, it is not a good sign, Eddie. That
is not not a good sign. So, oh, he is there.
I'm told he has called in. All right, I am
told he is there, so we can let's we'll cross
the lines. Let's put him on we man. Are you there,
weed Man? Let me see if he's there, but punch
him up. I think that was that was Thomas there is,
(27:14):
weed Man. I'm sorry, I'm late. I love you.
Speaker 4 (27:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Well why did you text me and say who's this?
Why did you do that? What?
Speaker 2 (27:23):
What are you talking about?
Speaker 1 (27:25):
Hey, Ben, listen, I need a place to live? Wait? Wait, wait, wait,
hold on hold, oh my god, you know what that Coop?
Speaker 3 (27:34):
That?
Speaker 1 (27:34):
Okay the number? We don't have your number, weed Man,
because I the number Coop just got. Boy, this is embarrassing.
So Coop just gave me a number to a Miami number.
So then I called the number. Nobody answered. I then
got a text saying who's this? And then I wrote
back and said Billy and the person said, no, Billy,
(27:55):
did you change your number? Weed Man? Maybe?
Speaker 5 (28:07):
Okay, this is the number that that Lisa gave me
when when when we talked last No, No.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
That that that called that number. I'm looking at the
number I just called the number I just got a text,
No Billy here and.
Speaker 3 (28:20):
Cool, cool answer.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
How do you not know your number? I don't understand.
I do not under you're on the phone. How do
you not know the number? You're not a dinosaur. I
can't figure this out on the air? Put on you?
(28:46):
Oh God? All right, but that number you gave me
is not his number?
Speaker 5 (28:51):
Should should we say goodbye to Thomas?
Speaker 1 (28:54):
Thomas? You want to say hello to weed Man before
we hang up on you? Thomas, I'm going man, weed Man,
you got a fan in Sydney, Australia.
Speaker 4 (29:07):
Would you like to live in Sydney? Weed Man?
Speaker 1 (29:09):
No, come to California though, Okay, it's a little closer,
all right, all right, thank you Thomas here. Thanks for
being a fan of the show. There. I appreciate your
support and costing fifty dollars to call the show, so
so thank you. It does mean a lot, uh so,
because we just spent several minutes talking to weed Man
about his number, which he still does not know, although
(29:32):
he started to give it out on the air. Why
don't we pause for the cost and we'll just have
a giant block, a massive block of lame jokes of
the week. Does anyone say no? To that. Nobody says
no to that. We'll have Big Man's lame jokes of
the week for the rest of the hour. We'll get
to it and we will do it next. But it's
(29:55):
the bonus live read, some would say, the most important
live reader the hour. It's me, your friend Ben where
our people at DraftKings. Don't you hate it when your
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Speaker 2 (31:25):
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Speaker 4 (31:37):
Step into a world of imagination. The Ben Maallar Show
has no marketing budget. We need your assistance in growing
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Tag malor related content on all social media networks. You
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Speaker 2 (32:02):
Knock knock, who's there? Blame Weed, Blame we too.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
It's Big Ben's lame joke of the week. Ah, here
we go. It's Big Ben's lame jokes. LUI are you ready?
Weed man? Come on? What all right? All right? These
are actual jokes in by actual listeners. If you think
you're funny. You want to send a joke in, you
can send them in care of Ben Mahler's show at
gmail dot com. That's Ben Malors show at gmail dot com.
(32:27):
Did you know that Lizzo did not want a car
when she turned sixteen? Yeah, she wanted a taco truck
is what she wanted. That's a surfer, Todd the comedian.
What did I'm sorry, what did Lizzo think of the
s car go from the Sane River in Paris? What
(32:49):
she said? She said it tasted like crap, is what
she said. That's Eke and Rozo, Minnesota. Well, some sad
news from business. McDonald's sales fell one in the last quarter. Yeah,
well Lizzo said, well, I'll fix that. She said, I'll
get right on that. That's Ike Eke in Roseville, Minnesota.
(33:11):
Did you hear that Donald Trump paid Lizzo to keep
their affair a secret? You hear about that? Oh yeah,
they're they're calling it hush puppy money is what they're
calling it. That's Gordon and Tacoma sent that one in.
Thank you, Gordon. Now, what does Kyrie think about Lizzo?
(33:32):
What Kyrie Irving said? She's not round, she's flat. That's
a Noah Noah in Austin, all right? Why why would
Lizzo prefer to be stranded in space rather than at
the bottom of the sea. Why one word weightlessness? Weightlessness
(33:52):
is the word that's from Daryl's Big Ben's Lames Jokes
a week. These are actual jokes in and by actual listeners.
I don't care, Athy and Madison? Who loves you weed Man?
Would you would you like to live with Kathy and Madison? Wisconsin? Okay?
All right? Why not?
Speaker 2 (34:10):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (34:10):
It's warm, it's warm, edi very warm, And let's just
not all right? What dance is Lizzo going to do
on America's God Talent?
Speaker 3 (34:18):
What?
Speaker 1 (34:20):
Well, she's gonna start out tap dancing, but it's gonna
end with a break dance. That's a Chip in Maine.
Thank you for that. Very funny Chip, a prolific cookie
maker and also joke writer. Why shouldn't weed Man leave Miami? Why, well,
he's been arrested so much they should retire his inmate number.
(34:42):
That's Noah in Awesome. Yeah you're like that. You know
James Harden had his number retired by the Ballet the
prison there the jail in Miami should retire your number,
weed Man. You're such a regular customer, you're probably on
a first name relationship with the jailer there, right, all right?
If weed Man traveled one hundred miles south by bus
(35:03):
and left at one pm, where would he be at
three pm? I don't know where in the Caribbean sea
is where he would be. That's uh. Dennis in Detroit
sent that one in Thank you, Dennis. I was in
your airport last weekend. Nice airport. Kind kind of big though.
(35:24):
Why can't weed Man keep a relationship going? Why? Because
he only knows how to covetch and release. That's all
he does. That's Eric, Eric in Kansas. He got any jokes, Coop?
Any any lame jokes? All right? If you want to
send offensive jokes to Coop. He used to who's the
guy in Australia used to send all the jokes? He
(35:45):
stopped sending jokes. It was the guy's name. I really
got Ozzy guy.
Speaker 3 (35:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (35:51):
What happened to him? I think he got married or something.
I don't know. Did you hear that? We here? Why
weed Man and Coop the loop smoked Acapulco gold with
lepper on Mike. Yeah, why they wanted a pot of
gold is what they wanted. There you go, that's a
That was some Kathy and Madison sent that joke in
Thank you Kathy, How boogle gold? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (36:12):
Old school?
Speaker 1 (36:13):
How lazy ish, so sad? How lazy is weed man
hippie lazy? He won't he won't even use expresspros dot
com to find a job. That's how lazy. That's Tom.
Tom from Fullerton sent that one in how do we
know we the weed man isn't bad at everything?
Speaker 5 (36:35):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (36:36):
Because he's good for nothing. Good for nothing is what
he said. Let me now, let me see who sent
that joke, because I didn't write that name down. And
if I don't say who sent the joke, they stopped
sending jokes, and we don't want them to stop sending jokes. Oh,
that was sir for Todd, the comedian that sent that
in Very funny Man. He was at the mall of
Meet and Greet in Vegas. How did weedman hippie monogram
(36:59):
his twu? He wrote his and herpies is what he wrote.
That's George George and Uvalde, Texas. Uh. What These are
actual jokes by actual listeners of the show. It's Big
Man's lamb jokes of the week. What was weed Man's
recurring nightmare in jail? Oh no, what transgender Dave showing
(37:24):
up for a conjugal visit with the bail money. That's
a chip. In Maine, we have a what is transgender Dave?
But he's running for the for the White House or
something like that. In Houston, did did you hear that
weed Man hippie was arrested for stealing kitchen utensils? Yeah, yeah,
(37:45):
it was. It was crazy. It was a it was
a whisk he was willing to take. That's a pretty
good joke. That's in in Burnaby, British Columbia sent that in.
You're big in Canada, weed Man, and they love you
in Canada. Would you go to British Columbia. I'll go
(38:06):
anywhere right.
Speaker 4 (38:07):
Now, Ben, I need to play for bad.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
Somebody send me a place for me, all right, give
us your number. There were people I wanted to call you.
I tried calling you three times this week and I
kept you didn't answer it because I didn't have your number.
Marcel was I'll believe it when I see it. Marcel
was upset with Blair and Maine for clucking like a chicken. Really, yeah,
(38:30):
Marcel said he doesn't like foul language. All right, well,
Donald Trump, President Trump is a loyal listener to the
Ben Mather Show. How about that we man?
Speaker 2 (38:42):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (38:44):
Yeah, every night he's with an earshot of the radio.
So it's a right there. That's a econ woes. Woman.
Did you ever hang out with Trump when you were
in New York? You were a big wig in New
York before you became homeless, did you ever? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (38:58):
We were last.
Speaker 1 (39:03):
That is great. I did not have that on my
bingo card today. Yeah, but we've been was like he
had money and he used to hang out at the
casinos and stuff, So I figured he came across Trump
at one point earlier. All right, what did Paul Revere
say when Ben Maler had a Mini Mallard meet and
greet in Boston last weekend?
Speaker 3 (39:19):
What?
Speaker 1 (39:20):
The Rednecks are coming? The Rednecks are coming? How dare you, Gordon?
How dare you Gordon? What's David Vessay, the Dodger postgame host,
plans for Halloween. What he'll be dressing up as a
giant douche? Yeah? What? What that's from American Kansas? What
games were Coop's favorite. When he was in Vegas at
(39:41):
the casino, he liked the high limit ones. Last one.
What is Mike the Leprechaun's favorite kind of vehicle? What
the land clover? That's from Curt from Earth Pig Ben's
lame jokes of the Week
Hello and welcome. It's our dum number three. As we
sneak around in the middle of the night recording this
podcast limited limited commercial eruption. So here in our number
three talking bays Baul, what do you make of Commissioner
Rob Manford's plan to mandate MLB starters goes six innings
(00:23):
a mandate a rule. Bryce Harper called the Phillies play
recently unacceptable while holding a team meeting. Will this solved
the problems in the Delaware Valley? And Dave Roberts Dodgers
they're leading the Nation League West is down to just
two games? Is it panic time in La La Land.
(00:43):
We'll get to that as well. And lame jokes of
the week coming your way right now. It's our number three.
We'll call it the deep six. That's what we're gonna
call it. Welcome. In the beginning of another hour of
the Ben Malor Show. We are in the air everywhere,
(01:05):
slithering in the night, as we shine a light on
the night, coast to coast, border, the border and beyond
on the vast and missiously powerful microphones of FSR emmanating
live from the cast. Not broadcasting, it's witch casting. We're
(01:26):
broadcasting live from the tyrack dot com studios. Tyract dot
com will help you get there and unmatched selection, fast,
free shipping, free road hazard protection and over ten thousand
recommended in stars. Tyract dot com. The way tire buying
should be a know Gumby Dave back very active on
social media. Gumby Dave very active, and he's always liked
(01:50):
round numbers and the number ten thousand, round number, round number.
He likes it a lot. But our lead this we
will blame jokes coming up later in the hour, but
our lead this hour. Headline from Park Avenue, Midtown, Manhattan,
Concrete Jungle, A big shakeup is being considered in the
Big League. Now, if you didn't hear about this, maybe
(02:13):
you were busy living your life and not obsessing with
this nonsense. Perhaps you missed it. So the streets have
been talking here, and what are they saying. They're telling
us that Major League Baseball is contemplating a six inning requirement,
a six inning requirement for starting pitchers. Now, let me
repeat that for those of you that are bad at hearing.
(02:37):
Maybe in the back of the room there you're hearing
aid isn't working Like Angry Bill. Major League Baseball is
exploring a rule change that will mandate a starting pitcher
goes six innings, not five innings, not four innings, six innings.
They claim the mandate is to quote restore the prestige
(02:59):
of the star pitcher, among other on field goals Baseball
has put in recent years, things like the ghost Runner,
the three batter minimum for relief pitchers, the extra wildcard team.
We can go on on all right, So let us
discuss the question what do you make of Commissioner Rob
Manford's plan to mandate that Major League Baseball starters go
(03:24):
six innings? So I've got Scotch tape, window dressing, and
Bob Ross, and we will combine all of these things
together and we are going to make a leap of faith,
is what we're going to do. So first of all,
I'm gonna begin with this. My first thought is that
Rob Manford is obsessed with futzing around with the game,
(03:48):
that he does not believe the game is good, he
does not believe the product is good, and he is
help bent on changing. And what he's really doing, though,
is towing to television because the TV people complain about
these things, and Rob Manfer is like, well that's the
gold thing. I get why he's doing it from a
(04:09):
pure business standpoint. If television says we don't want baseball anymore,
then that's it. That is the death of baseball. So
he wants to build a better mouse trap when the
mousetrap they have is fine. But my position on the
sixth inning rule, the six inning rule for starting pitchers,
(04:31):
I am ambivalent on this. I have mixed emotions because
here's why I agree with the premise that Major League
Baseball needs to go MSPGA. MSPGA make starting pitchers great again.
They need to make starting pitchers great again. It's better
for the business, it's better for television, it's an easier
(04:51):
sport to sell, and Baseball for its entire history, up
until the last ten fifteen years, had always position itself
around the starting pitcher. They were just a little more
important than every other player. They were the headliners on
the Broadway show. And every sport has that. Baseball does
(05:14):
not because of the nerds. Nobody wants to talk about
that part. But it's because of big data, right, analytics
and spreadsheets and trying to get a competitive match. That
is why they have killed this. That's it right in
you look at the marketing of sports, the hype men
(05:35):
of sports boxing for so long massive back in the day.
Now it's MMA, But when boxing was in its a
day and they were dominating, you tuned in because obviously
it was the big name fighters. It was if any
how old you are, Muhammad Ali or you know the
Mike Tyson and Ander Holyfield era, it mattered. It meant right,
(06:02):
not as much anymore as well the only ones in
the ring. Of course it met something. But the whole
marketing concept is based on trying to make things a spectacle,
make it more important. In the NFL, when you get
ready for an NFL game, you're not getting ready for
the Chiefs and the Bengals. You're getting ready for Mahomes
versus Burrow. They're above the headline there. And in the
(06:28):
NBA it's Nikola Jokic the Joker versus Steph Curry and
then the Warriors, right, they're the people that moved the
needle and everything else is subterfuge. And for years baseball
was like that. It was big time starting pitchers and
you I remember when back in my day that you
(06:48):
looked forward to matchups because you knew it was going
to be good, and guys had to go. In those days,
they pitched six or seven innings and you were called
a was and you were emasculated if you didn't go
that far into a game. Nowadays it's the opposite. People
look at you like you're some kind of freak of nature,
like you're you're some kind of lizard person. If you
(07:10):
go into the seventh inning, like what is wrong with you?
You're making the rest of us look bad. It reminds
me of when I used to go on the baseball
beat back in the day, and they had this thing
called the major league jog. We're very popular in the
nineties when I was around baseball, and the major league
jog is when you're an established major league player and
(07:31):
you hit a ball like a fly ball that you're
pretty confident is going to be an out. You don't
hustle right now, you don't walk, but you don't run.
They call it the major league jog. And then, but
it never really happens. There'll be some hot shot minor
league guy that'll come up back in those days, or
maybe it was somebody who was like a lifetime minor
(07:51):
leaguer who got a taste at the show. And they'd
come up and they'd run like gangbusters, and they would
be scolded by the other players because you're making us
look bad. Now, when a starting pitcher goes late in
a game, it's like, what's wrong with you, dude? Come on, man,
one hundred pitches? You need ice? One hundred pitches? Why well,
(08:12):
some guy in the eighties decided one hundred pitches was
all the human body could allow. God forbid, no, you
know back, you know for Nado Valenzuela through like two
hundred pitches in the game, Levon Hernandez in Cuba, the
legend is through like three hundred and fifty pitches in
a day in Cuba, and going on. Now, I've going
on anyway, Bajor League Baseball has lost its way because
(08:32):
of the nerds. They've marginalized the starting pitcher. Now we
disagree though, with the way Rob Manford is planning undoing,
and this is my position. Much like the shift. They
banned the shift. I was against that these things should
happen organically. It should be a market correction. You should
not have government oversight. This is just bureaucracy. It's scotch tape,
(08:55):
but it's red tape and masking tape. You're masking the problem,
the under lying condition in baseball. League officials have added
all of these fugazy rules in recent years. Right, But
even this, there's always the exemption, the exemption for this
as well. The pitcher suffers an injury, they don't have
to go six obviously, if they throw more than one
(09:17):
hundred pitches, you don't have to go six innings. If
you allow four or more earned runs, you are allowed
to take the picture out. So it opens up the
door for what if the exemption is Hey, if you're
suffering from an injury, all of a sudden, flopping will
come to baseball for pitching. Right, Oh my aching back,
(09:39):
Oh my knee, my back, my knee and my back.
All right? Yes. Secondly, great movie Friday, wonderful movie. All right. Secondly,
we fly into Philadelphia, where the Phillies have recently been
a suck back team. Actually the last couple days they've won,
but they inspired a recent team meeting MVP Bryce Harper
did not did not hold back, did not bite his tongue.
(10:02):
He addressed the comodo dragon in the room, or what
did he say? The recent performance of the fight in
Phils who haven't shown much fight said, it's been unacceptable.
That's the money quote, Bryce Harper calling the Phillies performance
on the field unacceptable while holding a team meeting a clubhouse.
Pow wow. Will this solve the problem in the Delaware Valley?
(10:27):
So i'n't answer this by using algebra N plus zero
equals no. The player's only meeting a staple of slumping
teams from sea to shining sea. You do it. It's
a thing you do. You know, they have the circle
(10:48):
of life. Like you're born, You go to school right
because society expects that, and then you find someone to
spend your life with, You get married, you get your career,
then you retire and you die. That's like the circle
a live well. In this case, the circle of slumping
teams is team meeting, team meeting. It has remained in
(11:11):
enduring tradition over the years. It's always window dressing. You
never hear about player only meetings when things are going well.
It's only something that happens when you stink, right, And
this is an effort by Bryce Harper and the Phillies
to keep the angry fans and media at bay. That's
the effort here. It's the old well, maybe this will
(11:32):
help and this will shut them up. We're trying. You
can't be upset with us. We're trying. Now. The Phillies,
even with this bad play the last month, are still
in really good shape because they're tremendously talented, and the
Mets and Braves have been like jackwagons over this same
period of time. All right, final thought. After the bullpen
(11:54):
blew a late lead in Milwaukee on Thursday afternoon, Dave
Rob's Dodgers find themselves falling apart. Their National League West
lead is down to just two games? Is it panic
city in La La Land? So I'm shaking my head. No,
(12:18):
you can't see me. And if you can't see me,
you're a stalker. And I'm gonna call the cops. This
is a Bob Ross special. It's a happy little accident.
I am Benny Brightside on the Doyers. I want to
see them keep losing. I do. I'm not you guys
(12:39):
keep trying to you know, bust my balls. You're sending
me these messages. I see them. Here's why I believe
it's a good thing. It's a blessing in disguise. In
recent years, the Dodgers have coasted into the postseason. Last
couple of years. They have been on cruise control, on
auto pilot going into the playoffs, and then the playoffs
(12:59):
have started the last couple of years, and what do
they do. They have first class seats on the vomit
comet in the postseason. So I'm happy that the Padres
and the Demon Diamondbacks, teams that have beaten them by
the way in recent years in the playoffs, are holding
them accountable. That's good. I would like to see the
Dodgers barely get in the playoffs as a wildcard team.
(13:21):
Bring on the boiling cauldron. I can't go to Dodgers
Stadium anymore. I got banned anyway because of Atani, So fine,
I don't care. I'm not gonna go to those games anyway.
Let them play on the road. Part of me wants
the Dodgers again just to barely get in the playoffs
as that last wildcard team in the National League. Have
to have every disadvantage in the world because they're going
(13:41):
to have to win high pressure games and that's what
you have to do in the playoffs. And by the way,
it is a win win situation for me, because either
they figure this thing out and they go on a run,
they get back to a World Series, win another championship,
or this goes sideways and upside down and there's upheaval
in La La Land, and Dave Roberts finally becomes the
(14:04):
fall guy because they got to get rid of some way.
If the Dodgers don't make the playoffs, are barely getting
the playoffs and losing the first round, someone's going to
lose their job. And why not Dave Roberts. We really
liked them in that spot. So they either win or
Dave Roberts is gone. It is the Ben Mallor Show.
If you'd like to be part of this, you can
(14:25):
join the conversation right now. Speak easy rules are in effect.
I realized we tease the story. We got to carry
it away on something last night. We didn't get to it,
so we'll we'll circle back to that, the story about
a baseball team who's getting absolutely ripped here for someone
who they honored put above everyone else in society, and
some members of society are a little upset by that.
(14:46):
We love those type of stories. Time now for the
Mallor reddle Love Today, And here is the Mallor really
Love Today. A Cowboys coach Mike McCarthy. Mike McCarthy says
he believes that Micah Parsons it would blank again. Cowboys
head coach Mike McCarthy recently said he believes that Mike
(15:07):
Micah Parsons could blank. That is the malord. Really love
today the answer. We'll get to it. We'll do it next.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Maller
Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific on
Fox Sports Radio and the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
Hey, what's up everybody?
Speaker 3 (15:25):
It's me three time pro bowler LeVar Arrington and I
couldn't be more excited to announce a podcast called Up
on Game?
Speaker 1 (15:32):
What is Up on Game?
Speaker 3 (15:33):
You asked, along with my fellow pro bowler TJ. Huschman
Zada and Super Bowl champion Yup, that's right, Plexico Burrs.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
You can only name a show with that type of
talent on it. Up on Game.
Speaker 3 (15:46):
We're going to be sharing our real life experiences loaded
with teachable moments. Listen to Up on Game with Me,
LeVar Arrington, TJ. Hutschman, Zada, and Plexico Burrs on the
iHeartRadio app, Apple Pop or wherever you get your podcast
from The.
Speaker 4 (16:05):
Ben Maler Show is a collaborative effort. You're invited to
communicate with those of us on this side of the microphones.
You can follow your host on x he's at Ben
Maller and you could tweet at our technical producer Mark,
who's in for LORAYNH. He's either not on social media
or he doesn't want you to know where he is
on social media. And now I from the tyrack dot
(16:27):
Com Fox Sports Radio Studios.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
It's Ben Maller, lamb jokes coming up later this hour.
Do we need a fake weed Man or is the
real weed Man going to show up? Inquiring minds would
like to know. We'll find out.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
What's the latest on him. Do we have the latest?
Speaker 1 (16:43):
Yeah, he's out a well. Last I checked, he was
out of jail.
Speaker 4 (16:46):
Okay, but there were a couple of people that supposedly
were gonna help Mount.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
Is he contacting them? Well, I here's the problem. I've
tried calling weed Man and either I don't have his
number anymore or I don't know what's going on. He's
not answered his phone, so maybe I have an old number.
I thought I had a new number. It's hard to
keep track do.
Speaker 4 (17:06):
You think he really wants help, because every time we
try and get him some help, it's somehow mysteriously doesn't work.
Speaker 1 (17:13):
But we did get him a place to stay, and
and he sabotaged that. Yeah, he called the cops and
then there was a big you know, to do or whatever.
But he claimed he was in the right on that.
But he did move in with the person that they
gave him the room. So there were some friends of
the show that we're like, hey, I got I got
a place. And weed Man's always been I only want
to live in Miami, and I want to live like
(17:34):
Fort Lauderdale or lower and I don't want to go
any further north north. And he's got like all these
rules about Miami.
Speaker 4 (17:40):
Well it makes sense for a homeless guy to have
a list of demands.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
Yes, it's the beauty of weed Man.
Speaker 5 (17:48):
So I was thinking about this when driving in, and
I was like, because the last we talked to him,
we mentioned something about him coming out here in California
and just living on the streets out here in California,
because you know, it's plenty of homeless communities. Uh, And
I thought, well, you know, it wouldn't be too hard
I'm sure if we set something up, like, you know,
how much is one way ticket from Miami to LA,
(18:10):
Like it's not that much, you know, get you know,
several people to pitch in five bucks. You get there
in no time. But then I was thinking, how, you know,
would he be happy out here? And I was like,
what does he do with his day? Does he have
a bunch of homeless friends? Would he miss his homeless friends?
Does he who does he talk to? Is it just
is he just on the phone with Lisa all day long?
Speaker 1 (18:31):
Yeah? I mean there's a lot of layers to it.
I mean, because you've got that he wouldn't know anybody.
He does seem like a very social guy and like
he's not an introvert, he's an extroverts. So there's that.
The other problem is if we bloomed to La, he
would he would his home would be right outside the studio,
Like he would be there. Yeah, I'm not exactly he'd
be like okay.
Speaker 5 (18:51):
No, I know, but I feel like that would be great,
that it'd be funny for for a while, But he would.
Speaker 4 (18:56):
Want to be in here all the time, right, he'd
out and want weed man hanging out.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
But if we had a bad segment, but like, let's
get weed Man, you know, we'll call it. We'll bring
him out, get him outside, We'll bring.
Speaker 5 (19:09):
Him in and be wonderful, right like, as long as
he doesn't fall asleep on my desk.
Speaker 4 (19:13):
It's uh, he could.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
Have drunk and yeah, okay, all right, Well hopefully we'll
hear from weed maned before he is not called in
and who maybe you can give me the number you
gave me last time, because the number I have on
my phone, I tried to call him, he's it does
not seem like it's his phone, so I have to
scroll back through. Okay, well that would take a fair
amount of time, I understand, but I don't have his
number anyway. Here's the it appears I don't have his
(19:38):
number because he's not answered his phone. I've tried to
contact him. Here's the who am I game? Or nothing?
Who am I him? The Mallard riddle of to day? Uh.
Cowboys coach Mike McCarthy says he believes that his star
defensive player Micah Parsons could blank. That is the Mallor
riddle of the day. What is the answer? Roll skate backwards?
A roller skate backwards? Was guessed by somebody lost their name.
(20:01):
He'd he'd be a great water boy from Milkman. Mike,
who else do we have? Page down? Page down? I
can't read that one on the air. Etch a sketch,
etch a sketch him on the sidelines between plays. Guessed
by Malo Probably that's pretty good, pretty good app thing
(20:22):
he got their fer dog from the OC says could
break dance better than Olympic gold medalist Raygun. Who else
do we have? Make the Baba gonoosh from Asher Sewn
and Portland said rollerscape backwards? Eat raw beef from the
King Rory believes that Michah Parsons could be a conspiracy theorist.
(20:43):
Guessed by Alf the Alien, O Pinter Eke and Roseuo,
Minnesota said eat a horse. Mike McCarthy believes Micah Parsons
can jump on a pogo stick while eating an apple fritter.
I need to get an apple fritter. Those things aren't
those good, Michael, Those apple fritters, I haven't had one
amount of time. Man, They're great, well made apple fritter awesome.
(21:04):
And donuts are like fast food. I was I was
trying to explain this to my my wife. She brought
home some donuts and I was like, I'm not eating those.
Those have been sitting around a donut. Every minute a
donut sits after it's made. Donut our friend Donut Kelly
can tell you about this, but every minute that goes by,
the quality of the donut goes down.
Speaker 4 (21:26):
Well, I think, weren't you the one that said just
pop it in the microwave for a couple of seconds.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
Well you can't, but it's it's it's that that's the
only way I would eat it. It does bring it
back to life. But even that is not the original.
How am I a.
Speaker 4 (21:41):
Diva that's only fresh baked donuts for King Malar?
Speaker 1 (21:45):
Well, that's because let me let me tell you why.
When I was doing local radio, we did a remote
at the largest Winchels donut shop and I think they
were calling themselves the largest donut shop in the country.
Speaker 4 (22:00):
Largest, Yes, like two stories.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
They produced the most donuts per hour at that time.
That was their whole marketing. They had us out there
to do remote so that the guy that ran the
donut shop, he'd like, take the donuts right off the
conveyor belt thing they had and here have some donuts.
Speaker 4 (22:18):
That is so.
Speaker 1 (22:19):
I mean, you've had that.
Speaker 4 (22:20):
I understand that. I can understand that, But that doesn't
mean that you know you're gonna swear off donuts for
the rest of your life unless they're off a convey
conveyor belt right into your mouth.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
Well, you know, I have to keep my my model
looks at he here's the here's the answer on the
roof of the day. Found it? Oh you found it? Good? Okay, good?
I send that over on the answer, No, he found
weed man's numbers. Okay, what's the answer, Eddie? I don't
know you all right. Cowboys coach Mike McCarthy says he
believes Michael Parsons could probably play running back in the
(22:51):
n f L. Couldn't play running he said it. He
said that, But he says that don't expect him to
get many carries because if Michael Parsons got hurt, he said,
running the ball, he said, I would just walk out
of the front gate and keep walking. Mike McCarthy said,
So that is the answer to the Malle riddle. And
the New York Mets are being roasted because they honored
(23:15):
someone who well but a viral star was given one
of the highest honors you can get as a fan
threw out the first pitch. You see, who threw out
the first pitch of the Mets game?
Speaker 4 (23:27):
Eddie was Was it the fry guy this time or something?
Speaker 2 (23:30):
Hand?
Speaker 1 (23:31):
Before they had Grimace, they honored the Hawk to a girl. No, yes,
how did she do? She spit all over that thing.
Haley Welch is her name, and so the Mets they
moved on from Grimace to the Hawk to a girl.
She threw out the first pitch. And this has caused
(23:53):
an uproar in New York because the Metropolitans. I guess
they wanted to honor her oral can eddication skills. But uh,
they're they're getting they're getting ripped apart here, like what
are you doing? You're a joke and all that.
Speaker 4 (24:05):
No.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
I thought it was funny, but I'm not a Mets fan.
And one of the beat writers for the Mets, for
the guy that works for Newsday, said they were not
allowed to mention the Hawk tour girl in the story.
Apparently she's banned from Newsday. Like who the hell's reading
Newsday anyway? But the beat writers said, can't. I can't
do it. And so if the Mets continue to lose.
(24:29):
Are they going to blame the Hawk tour girl because
they credited Grimace when they were playing well? But lately
they have not played that well. They have not well.
Speaker 4 (24:37):
They did blow a five nothing lead.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Yeah, I guess the Oakland Athletics. My god, let's go
to the international line real quick, Eddie, the international line.
I know Thomas in Sydney. Hello, Thomas, Yes, welcome, Number
one has returned.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
Just missed them all? Lash my king?
Speaker 1 (24:58):
Hello, Hello, I'm king, Eddie. You don't respect me like
a king. This guy respects me like a king. This
Thomas guy. Yes, Edward the third the one that goes
beheaded or something. Yeah, very well, they all got beheaded
back in the day. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
Yeah, how are you doing with that? How you doing
with the weed men?
Speaker 4 (25:16):
There?
Speaker 2 (25:17):
Come find him yet?
Speaker 1 (25:19):
Yeah, we can't find We have a number, so I'm
gonna try to call him. But you want to be
a fake weed man?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Do you know what? Take it? Tom? Sounds good?
Speaker 4 (25:28):
Costs too much money for him to stay on hold though?
Speaker 1 (25:30):
For that one, well, I'll give me up. I mean
it is gonna be expensive where it's not toll free
from Australia, So do you want to you want to
do it? Or do you wanna hang up?
Speaker 2 (25:38):
I'll do it, dudes.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
All right, he's this guy's in it, Thomas. We're big
in Sydney, Eddie. We play well in Sydney.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
Beautiful city.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Have you?
Speaker 1 (25:49):
I've never been there. I like to go.
Speaker 4 (25:51):
That's awesome. I would love to go.
Speaker 1 (25:54):
Too expensive. See, everyone can play in California. Yeah, okay.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Be sure to catch live editions of The Best Maller
Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific.
Speaker 4 (26:03):
And with our Australian listener on hold, we give you this.
Australian breakdancer Ray Gun says she is devastated by the
backlash she has received from her Olympic routine. She said, quote,
I worked my butt off preparing for the Olympics and
gave it my all, truly end quote.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
All right, very good there, Eddie. I did call the
weed man and he did not answer the phone, although
he did send me a text from that numbers, so
maybe he's unless somebody took his phone.
Speaker 4 (26:36):
I don't know what did this text say?
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Who is this?
Speaker 4 (26:40):
Oh that's not a good sign.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
Uh no, it is not a good sign, Eddie. That
is not not a good sign. So, oh, he is there.
I'm told he has called in. All right, I am
told he is there, so we can let's we'll cross
the lines. Let's put him on we man. Are you there,
weed Man? Let me see if he's there, but punch
him up. I think that was that was Thomas there is,
(27:14):
weed Man. I'm sorry, I'm late. I love you.
Speaker 4 (27:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Well why did you text me and say who's this?
Why did you do that? What?
Speaker 2 (27:23):
What are you talking about?
Speaker 1 (27:25):
Hey, Ben, listen, I need a place to live? Wait? Wait, wait, wait,
hold on hold, oh my god, you know what that Coop?
Speaker 3 (27:34):
That?
Speaker 1 (27:34):
Okay the number? We don't have your number, weed Man,
because I the number Coop just got. Boy, this is embarrassing.
So Coop just gave me a number to a Miami number.
So then I called the number. Nobody answered. I then
got a text saying who's this? And then I wrote
back and said Billy and the person said, no, Billy,
(27:55):
did you change your number? Weed Man? Maybe?
Speaker 5 (28:07):
Okay, this is the number that that Lisa gave me
when when when we talked last No, No.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
That that that called that number. I'm looking at the
number I just called the number I just got a text,
No Billy here and.
Speaker 3 (28:20):
Cool, cool answer.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
How do you not know your number? I don't understand.
I do not under you're on the phone. How do
you not know the number? You're not a dinosaur. I
can't figure this out on the air? Put on you?
(28:46):
Oh God? All right, but that number you gave me
is not his number?
Speaker 5 (28:51):
Should should we say goodbye to Thomas?
Speaker 1 (28:54):
Thomas? You want to say hello to weed Man before
we hang up on you? Thomas, I'm going man, weed Man,
you got a fan in Sydney, Australia.
Speaker 4 (29:07):
Would you like to live in Sydney? Weed Man?
Speaker 1 (29:09):
No, come to California though, Okay, it's a little closer,
all right, all right, thank you Thomas here. Thanks for
being a fan of the show. There. I appreciate your
support and costing fifty dollars to call the show, so
so thank you. It does mean a lot, uh so,
because we just spent several minutes talking to weed Man
about his number, which he still does not know, although
(29:32):
he started to give it out on the air. Why
don't we pause for the cost and we'll just have
a giant block, a massive block of lame jokes of
the week. Does anyone say no? To that. Nobody says
no to that. We'll have Big Man's lame jokes of
the week for the rest of the hour. We'll get
to it and we will do it next. But it's
(29:55):
the bonus live read, some would say, the most important
live reader the hour. It's me, your friend Ben where
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(30:41):
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(31:03):
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Speaker 2 (31:25):
Fox Sports Radio has the best sports talk lineup in
the nation. Catch all of our shows at Foxsports Radio
dot com and within the iHeartRadio app search FSR to
listen live.
Speaker 4 (31:37):
Step into a world of imagination. The Ben Maallar Show
has no marketing budget. We need your assistance in growing
the congregation of the malad militia. How do you do it?
Tag malor related content on all social media networks. You
are the missing jigsaw puzzle piece to unlock the Ben
Mahlor Show to new compatriots at I I from the
tyrack dot com, Fox Sports Radio Studios, It's Ben Maller.
Speaker 2 (32:02):
Knock knock, who's there? Blame Weed, Blame we too.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
It's Big Ben's lame joke of the week. Ah, here
we go. It's Big Ben's lame jokes. LUI are you ready?
Weed man? Come on? What all right? All right? These
are actual jokes in by actual listeners. If you think
you're funny. You want to send a joke in, you
can send them in care of Ben Mahler's show at
gmail dot com. That's Ben Malors show at gmail dot com.
(32:27):
Did you know that Lizzo did not want a car
when she turned sixteen? Yeah, she wanted a taco truck
is what she wanted. That's a surfer, Todd the comedian.
What did I'm sorry, what did Lizzo think of the
s car go from the Sane River in Paris? What
(32:49):
she said? She said it tasted like crap, is what
she said. That's Eke and Rozo, Minnesota. Well, some sad
news from business. McDonald's sales fell one in the last quarter. Yeah,
well Lizzo said, well, I'll fix that. She said, I'll
get right on that. That's Ike Eke in Roseville, Minnesota.
(33:11):
Did you hear that Donald Trump paid Lizzo to keep
their affair a secret? You hear about that? Oh yeah,
they're they're calling it hush puppy money is what they're
calling it. That's Gordon and Tacoma sent that one in.
Thank you, Gordon. Now, what does Kyrie think about Lizzo?
(33:32):
What Kyrie Irving said? She's not round, she's flat. That's
a Noah Noah in Austin, all right? Why why would
Lizzo prefer to be stranded in space rather than at
the bottom of the sea. Why one word weightlessness? Weightlessness
(33:52):
is the word that's from Daryl's Big Ben's Lames Jokes
a week. These are actual jokes in and by actual listeners.
I don't care, Athy and Madison? Who loves you weed Man?
Would you would you like to live with Kathy and Madison? Wisconsin? Okay?
All right? Why not?
Speaker 2 (34:10):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (34:10):
It's warm, it's warm, edi very warm, And let's just
not all right? What dance is Lizzo going to do
on America's God Talent?
Speaker 3 (34:18):
What?
Speaker 1 (34:20):
Well, she's gonna start out tap dancing, but it's gonna
end with a break dance. That's a Chip in Maine.
Thank you for that. Very funny Chip, a prolific cookie
maker and also joke writer. Why shouldn't weed Man leave Miami? Why, well,
he's been arrested so much they should retire his inmate number.
(34:42):
That's Noah in Awesome. Yeah you're like that. You know
James Harden had his number retired by the Ballet the
prison there the jail in Miami should retire your number,
weed Man. You're such a regular customer, you're probably on
a first name relationship with the jailer there, right, all right?
If weed Man traveled one hundred miles south by bus
(35:03):
and left at one pm, where would he be at
three pm? I don't know where in the Caribbean sea
is where he would be. That's uh. Dennis in Detroit
sent that one in Thank you, Dennis. I was in
your airport last weekend. Nice airport. Kind kind of big though.
(35:24):
Why can't weed Man keep a relationship going? Why? Because
he only knows how to covetch and release. That's all
he does. That's Eric, Eric in Kansas. He got any jokes, Coop?
Any any lame jokes? All right? If you want to
send offensive jokes to Coop. He used to who's the
guy in Australia used to send all the jokes? He
(35:45):
stopped sending jokes. It was the guy's name. I really
got Ozzy guy.
Speaker 3 (35:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (35:51):
What happened to him? I think he got married or something.
I don't know. Did you hear that? We here? Why
weed Man and Coop the loop smoked Acapulco gold with
lepper on Mike. Yeah, why they wanted a pot of
gold is what they wanted. There you go, that's a
That was some Kathy and Madison sent that joke in
Thank you Kathy, How boogle gold? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (36:12):
Old school?
Speaker 1 (36:13):
How lazy ish, so sad? How lazy is weed man
hippie lazy? He won't he won't even use expresspros dot
com to find a job. That's how lazy. That's Tom.
Tom from Fullerton sent that one in how do we
know we the weed man isn't bad at everything?
Speaker 5 (36:35):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (36:36):
Because he's good for nothing. Good for nothing is what
he said. Let me now, let me see who sent
that joke, because I didn't write that name down. And
if I don't say who sent the joke, they stopped
sending jokes, and we don't want them to stop sending jokes. Oh,
that was sir for Todd, the comedian that sent that
in Very funny Man. He was at the mall of
Meet and Greet in Vegas. How did weedman hippie monogram
(36:59):
his twu? He wrote his and herpies is what he wrote.
That's George George and Uvalde, Texas. Uh. What These are
actual jokes by actual listeners of the show. It's Big
Man's lamb jokes of the week. What was weed Man's
recurring nightmare in jail? Oh no, what transgender Dave showing
(37:24):
up for a conjugal visit with the bail money. That's
a chip. In Maine, we have a what is transgender Dave?
But he's running for the for the White House or
something like that. In Houston, did did you hear that
weed Man hippie was arrested for stealing kitchen utensils? Yeah, yeah,
(37:45):
it was. It was crazy. It was a it was
a whisk he was willing to take. That's a pretty
good joke. That's in in Burnaby, British Columbia sent that in.
You're big in Canada, weed Man, and they love you
in Canada. Would you go to British Columbia. I'll go
(38:06):
anywhere right.
Speaker 4 (38:07):
Now, Ben, I need to play for bad.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
Somebody send me a place for me, all right, give
us your number. There were people I wanted to call you.
I tried calling you three times this week and I
kept you didn't answer it because I didn't have your number.
Marcel was I'll believe it when I see it. Marcel
was upset with Blair and Maine for clucking like a chicken. Really, yeah,
(38:30):
Marcel said he doesn't like foul language. All right, well,
Donald Trump, President Trump is a loyal listener to the
Ben Mather Show. How about that we man?
Speaker 2 (38:42):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (38:44):
Yeah, every night he's with an earshot of the radio.
So it's a right there. That's a econ woes. Woman.
Did you ever hang out with Trump when you were
in New York? You were a big wig in New
York before you became homeless, did you ever? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (38:58):
We were last.
Speaker 1 (39:03):
That is great. I did not have that on my
bingo card today. Yeah, but we've been was like he
had money and he used to hang out at the
casinos and stuff, So I figured he came across Trump
at one point earlier. All right, what did Paul Revere
say when Ben Maler had a Mini Mallard meet and
greet in Boston last weekend?
Speaker 3 (39:19):
What?
Speaker 1 (39:20):
The Rednecks are coming? The Rednecks are coming? How dare you, Gordon?
How dare you Gordon? What's David Vessay, the Dodger postgame host,
plans for Halloween. What he'll be dressing up as a
giant douche? Yeah? What? What that's from American Kansas? What
games were Coop's favorite. When he was in Vegas at
(39:41):
the casino, he liked the high limit ones. Last one.
What is Mike the Leprechaun's favorite kind of vehicle? What
the land clover? That's from Curt from Earth Pig Ben's
lame jokes of the Week
Host
Ben Maller
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