April 5, 2025 • 13 mins
Feeling like your business boundaries have become a bit too relaxed? Struggling to stay on top of things and feeling overwhelmed by taking on too much? In today’s Ask Allison, I’m sharing actionable tips on how to regain control, reestablish your boundaries, and get back on track. Prefer video? This episode is also available to stream on our YouTube channel!
Sponsored by TherapyNotes®: Use promo code Abundant for 2 months free
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:07):
(Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) Welcome to Ask Allison.
Y'all ask the questions about having a
fun and thriving practice and I answer them.
We have a worksheet for you today so
you can bring this answer into your life.
You can access that at abundancepracticebuilding.com slash
links, where you'll also be able to ask
any questions you have for Ask Allison.
If you want more support, we've got some
free trainings in there too.
(00:28):
If you can't get enough Ask Allison, check
out our YouTube channel for our entire Ask
Allison library.
Welcome back to Ask Allison.
Here's today's question.
My business, not clinical boundaries have gotten a
little lax.
I'm not on top of things like I
used to be.
I'm doing too much and I'm overwhelmed most
of the time.
How do I get back on track?
(00:49):
So before I answer this awesome question, I
want to thank Therapy Notes for sponsoring Ask
Allison.
I've talked about them for years.
You know their features by heart probably if
you listen a lot, but here's what really
sets them apart.
First, they genuinely care about your experience.
It's not just about troubleshooting.
They actively implement user-suggested features like therapy
search, secure messaging, clinical outcome tracking, real-time
(01:13):
insurance checks, and a really smooth super bill
process.
Everyone at Therapy Notes believes in the product
and wants you to love it too.
Plus, they're independently owned, which means no venture
capital and no pressure to prioritize investors over
customers.
This independence allows them to keep their prices
fair and to focus on innovation and prioritize
their customer experience.
(01:34):
With over 100,000 therapists already on board,
they've proven that you don't have to compromise
success for quality.
If you're ready to see for yourself, I
want you to try Therapy Notes free for
two months with the code ABUNDANT at therapynotes
.com.
Okay, so for those of you who've worked
in toxic agencies, do you remember the Sunday
scaries?
(01:54):
It's that sinking feeling that you get as
the weekend winds down.
You may be lying in bed, staring at
the ceiling, mentally preparing for the work week
ahead of you.
Maybe you've even skipped brunch or avoided hanging
out with friends on Sundays just to mentally
brace yourself for the upcoming days.
It's a familiar anxiety and you're kind of
wondering how you're going to make it through
(02:16):
another week.
You might even have found yourself clocking out
on Friday only to spend the whole weekend
dreading Monday.
It's that dread, the emotional and the mental
burden that led me to private practice.
The idea of leaving a toxic workplace behind,
of having more control over my schedule, being
able to do the kinds of work that
really matters to me.
(02:36):
But private practice, while it offers autonomy, can
also quickly become just as stressful and just
as overwhelming if you are not careful.
So you might have left an agency job
in search of freedom and fulfillment, but without
some careful planning, you can really find yourself
recreating the same toxic work environment that you
tried to escape from.
(02:56):
That's why it's really important to take a
step back and to make sure that you
are intentionally building a practice that works for
you, because otherwise you risk finding yourself burned
out, you're stretched too thin, you're feeling like
stuck in this cycle, overworked and underappreciation.
So I want to dive into the signs
that you have unintentionally built yourself another agency
job in private practice, and more importantly, how
(03:18):
to course correct.
So sign number one, you feel like you
can't say no.
You might have seen it before, maybe in
a colleague or even in yourself, this constant
inability to say no.
It really starts pretty innocently, like maybe you're
taking on one extra client or agreeing to
stay late to finish paperwork, but then it
ends up snowballing and you're saying yes to
(03:38):
more clients, even though your schedule is already
full.
You're taking on clients that aren't a great
fit for you, clients that don't feel aligned,
or you don't do your best to work
with.
Maybe you're saying yes to everything else, the
constant stream of insurance requirements, your landlord's demands,
or colleagues requests for consultation and help.
Then before you know it, you've built a
practice where your boundaries are non-existent and
(03:59):
your schedule is completely out of control.
Your lunch breaks become non-existent as you're
like hunched over your computer trying to showcase
notes, answer emails, deal with billing while you're
eating a rushed snack.
You might be sitting at your desk at
7pm wondering how you ended up back in
the same place you were when you were
working at that toxic agency, only it's a
different boss, it's you, and you suck as
(04:21):
bad as your last boss did at being
a boss.
So let's talk about what to do about
it.
The very first step is to pause, take
a breath, give yourself permission to take a
break from saying yes to everything.
I suggest setting aside 30 minutes to really
reflect on what your practice does for you,
not just what you do for your clients.
(04:44):
It's really easy to get caught up in
people pleasing, maybe some codependency, especially when you're
a therapist.
We are trained to care for others, to
show up for them, and to help, but
if your practice is only serving your clients
and not you, you are going to dayburn
out.
So get clear on your priorities.
What do you want your practice to give
you?
So for example, I've found that I want
(05:05):
my practice to offer meaningful connection with clients,
moments of really great personal fulfillment, opportunities to
laugh, to feel appreciated.
If I take on clients that aren't the
right fit for me or they push me
past my limits, I'll not experience the kind
of joy or satisfaction that is important to
me in my business.
I also want to feel seen and valued
(05:25):
for my expertise.
If I'm not maintaining my boundaries, I end
up resenting work and it takes away from
the very reasons that I got into this
to begin with.
So take a hard look at your schedule,
like right now, like hit pause and look
at it.
Go to your calendar and carve out some
time for yourself, whether it's for admin work,
for rest, even just to get outside, you
(05:46):
deserve it.
And once you've made that space, the next
time a potential client reaches out, if they
don't fit into the slots that you've set
aside, don't hesitate to refer them to a
colleague.
It is really, really okay and important to
say no.
Sign number two, you have a lot of
tasks that you dread.
When you first started your private practice, it
(06:06):
was all about freedom, right?
You were going to be in charge of
your schedule.
You're going to work with the clients you
loved.
You're going to finally have control over your
day.
But then the reality of being a solopreneur
sets in, you realize that running a business
isn't just about seeing clients.
It's about handling your case notes, dealing with
insurance companies.
If you take insurance, managing your social media
(06:26):
presence, following up on unpaid claims, dealing with
phone calls, responding to emails, all these tasky
things.
And these have nothing to do with the
passion for therapy.
And as those build up, they can take
over your time and your energy.
So some days it can feel like you're
running a full-on administrative office rather than
a private practice.
The thought of doing more stuff in that
(06:49):
realm might make you throw your computer out
the window.
So you can feel drained by these tasks
that feel completely disconnected from your actual work
with clients.
And I want you to know what to
do about it.
Some of those tasks are always going to
be there.
As a private practice owner, you are responsible
for every aspect of the business.
It's essential to recognize that you don't have
to do everything yourself.
(07:10):
So the key here is to find ways
to automate, delegate, and to eliminate the things
that you hate or you don't have time
for.
Let's start with automation.
Tools like online scheduling can eliminate the back
and forth coordination of appointment times.
Practice management systems automate billing pretty well, or
at least make them so easy.
(07:31):
It's just a few clicks.
And that's whether you take insurance or you
don't.
Practice management systems can also send reminders to
clients about their payments, which can save you
a lot of time spent on trying to
track down money if you're not charging every
single session, which you should be, and making
sure that people know when their appointments are.
So I'm going to recommend therapy notes, which
(07:52):
I've already mentioned, but therapy notes does a
lot of the things that you need, probably
everything you need done in your practice.
You can also outsource, hiring a virtual assistant
to handle some of the less critical but
time-consuming kinds of tasks.
That could be answering phones.
It could be responding to emails.
It could be handling some of your marketing,
managing your calendar.
You might not enjoy some of those tasks,
(08:14):
but feel like for some reason you're supposed
to be doing it.
But there are people out there who love
that stuff.
You can hire somebody to do it for
you.
And that can be a great opportunity for
you.
Let's look at number three, you're burned out.
If you are feeling like you're on the
edge of burnout, you are not alone.
Private practice was kind of supposed to be
your solution to burnout, probably not the cause
(08:35):
of it.
But when we don't build our practice with
intention, it can really turn into that never
-ending stress cycle with exhaustion and overwhelm in
the mix.
So at first it might seem like you're
thriving, you're seeing clients, you're making money, you're
feeling that freedom that you longed for.
But as the months go by, and I
see this with our full folks a fair
amount.
(08:56):
In fact, we have a whole program just
for people who are full and in this
circumstance.
As the months go by, you notice like
your energy levels are dropping, you're emotionally drained
after every session, you're rushing from one client
to the next without taking adequate breaks.
You're working evenings and skipping lunch, and you're
just neglecting the things that you need to
do for your own self-care basically, all
(09:16):
in the name of staying on top of
things and getting ahead.
So then you're burned out.
And while you're making much more money than
you made in agency life, you're probably not
significantly happier.
So my goal is for you to be
happy.
The first step is to stop, like just
pause.
It's easy to get caught up in the
momentum of running your practice, but you've got
(09:36):
to step back and you've got to assess
what's going on.
And if you're burned out, it's a sign
that you've been pushing yourself too hard for
too long without taking proper breaks.
So this person's talking about their boundaries.
I want you to look at what you
actually want for your practice.
This is so important.
I want you to just take a little
bit of time to think about that.
(09:56):
The free worksheet today is going to be
a business burnout check-in that is going
to help you with this, but I want
you to think about, are you working the
days and the hours that you want to
work?
Are you charging the fee that you want
and need to charge?
Sometimes what we want and what we need
is different.
Often therapists need to charge a higher fee
than they're actually charging because there are lots
of expenses in this life, and you need
(10:17):
to save for retirement.
So look at these boundaries, look at how
you're ending sessions, making sure that you're doing
that on time so that you can run
to the bathroom, eat a snack, finish your
note, press the button to charge, whatever you
need to do in between sessions.
But if you're not doing those things, you're
not going to be able to get yourself
out of burnout if you're in this cycle.
(10:38):
Get some support, go to therapy about it.
There are a lot of therapists in therapy
right now about burnout.
Take a real vacation.
I mean, maybe leave your phone on airplane
mode the whole time.
Stay away from anything work-related.
Really take some time, and this doesn't have
to be something expensive if you can't just
jet away to Europe for the summer, but
(11:00):
take some time in a cabin nearby.
Take a staycation, but have real true set
time off so that you can think and
get out of the cycle you're in.
I want you to say no to everything.
Everybody who wants you to do an extra
thing, I want you to just say, oh,
I'm not able to do that right now.
It's fine.
(11:20):
It's loving.
It's kind.
No is fine.
Reconnect with your why.
There's a reason that we all became therapists.
A lot of those reasons are deeply personal
for us, and getting reconnected with that can
really help during these harder times.
So if any of these sound familiar, please
don't feel bad.
It's so common in private practice.
(11:40):
Like I said, we have a whole program
just for therapists who have kind of built
the wrong practice.
They need to make some big changes.
If you want or need support through that
program, send me a message that says limitless,
and we'll talk through whether or not it
makes sense to book a Zoom call to
then go further into whether it's a good
fit.
(12:00):
We only let folks in that program that
we are 100% sure we can help
reach their goals.
Like I said, this week's free worksheet is
business burnout check-in.
If you DM me the word sheets, I
will send it right to you.
And you also have access to all the
other free worksheets that we have when you
do that.
All right.
I hope that you say no and take
(12:21):
good care of yourself.
And I will talk to you later.
If you're ready for a much easier practice,
TherapyNotes is the way to go.
Go to therapynotes.com and use the promo
code abundant for two months free.
I hope that helped.
If you have questions for Ask Allison, or
you want to get your hands on the
worksheet for this episode, go to abundancepracticebuilding.com
(12:45):
slash links.
(Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) Welcome to Ask Allison.
Y'all ask the questions about having a
fun and thriving practice and I answer them.
We have a worksheet for you today so
you can bring this answer into your life.
You can access that at abundancepracticebuilding.com slash
links, where you'll also be able to ask
any questions you have for Ask Allison.
If you want more support, we've got some
free trainings in there too.
(00:28):
If you can't get enough Ask Allison, check
out our YouTube channel for our entire Ask
Allison library.
Welcome back to Ask Allison.
Here's today's question.
My business, not clinical boundaries have gotten a
little lax.
I'm not on top of things like I
used to be.
I'm doing too much and I'm overwhelmed most
of the time.
How do I get back on track?
(00:49):
So before I answer this awesome question, I
want to thank Therapy Notes for sponsoring Ask
Allison.
I've talked about them for years.
You know their features by heart probably if
you listen a lot, but here's what really
sets them apart.
First, they genuinely care about your experience.
It's not just about troubleshooting.
They actively implement user-suggested features like therapy
search, secure messaging, clinical outcome tracking, real-time
(01:13):
insurance checks, and a really smooth super bill
process.
Everyone at Therapy Notes believes in the product
and wants you to love it too.
Plus, they're independently owned, which means no venture
capital and no pressure to prioritize investors over
customers.
This independence allows them to keep their prices
fair and to focus on innovation and prioritize
their customer experience.
(01:34):
With over 100,000 therapists already on board,
they've proven that you don't have to compromise
success for quality.
If you're ready to see for yourself, I
want you to try Therapy Notes free for
two months with the code ABUNDANT at therapynotes
.com.
Okay, so for those of you who've worked
in toxic agencies, do you remember the Sunday
scaries?
(01:54):
It's that sinking feeling that you get as
the weekend winds down.
You may be lying in bed, staring at
the ceiling, mentally preparing for the work week
ahead of you.
Maybe you've even skipped brunch or avoided hanging
out with friends on Sundays just to mentally
brace yourself for the upcoming days.
It's a familiar anxiety and you're kind of
wondering how you're going to make it through
(02:16):
another week.
You might even have found yourself clocking out
on Friday only to spend the whole weekend
dreading Monday.
It's that dread, the emotional and the mental
burden that led me to private practice.
The idea of leaving a toxic workplace behind,
of having more control over my schedule, being
able to do the kinds of work that
really matters to me.
(02:36):
But private practice, while it offers autonomy, can
also quickly become just as stressful and just
as overwhelming if you are not careful.
So you might have left an agency job
in search of freedom and fulfillment, but without
some careful planning, you can really find yourself
recreating the same toxic work environment that you
tried to escape from.
(02:56):
That's why it's really important to take a
step back and to make sure that you
are intentionally building a practice that works for
you, because otherwise you risk finding yourself burned
out, you're stretched too thin, you're feeling like
stuck in this cycle, overworked and underappreciation.
So I want to dive into the signs
that you have unintentionally built yourself another agency
job in private practice, and more importantly, how
(03:18):
to course correct.
So sign number one, you feel like you
can't say no.
You might have seen it before, maybe in
a colleague or even in yourself, this constant
inability to say no.
It really starts pretty innocently, like maybe you're
taking on one extra client or agreeing to
stay late to finish paperwork, but then it
ends up snowballing and you're saying yes to
(03:38):
more clients, even though your schedule is already
full.
You're taking on clients that aren't a great
fit for you, clients that don't feel aligned,
or you don't do your best to work
with.
Maybe you're saying yes to everything else, the
constant stream of insurance requirements, your landlord's demands,
or colleagues requests for consultation and help.
Then before you know it, you've built a
practice where your boundaries are non-existent and
(03:59):
your schedule is completely out of control.
Your lunch breaks become non-existent as you're
like hunched over your computer trying to showcase
notes, answer emails, deal with billing while you're
eating a rushed snack.
You might be sitting at your desk at
7pm wondering how you ended up back in
the same place you were when you were
working at that toxic agency, only it's a
different boss, it's you, and you suck as
(04:21):
bad as your last boss did at being
a boss.
So let's talk about what to do about
it.
The very first step is to pause, take
a breath, give yourself permission to take a
break from saying yes to everything.
I suggest setting aside 30 minutes to really
reflect on what your practice does for you,
not just what you do for your clients.
(04:44):
It's really easy to get caught up in
people pleasing, maybe some codependency, especially when you're
a therapist.
We are trained to care for others, to
show up for them, and to help, but
if your practice is only serving your clients
and not you, you are going to dayburn
out.
So get clear on your priorities.
What do you want your practice to give
you?
So for example, I've found that I want
(05:05):
my practice to offer meaningful connection with clients,
moments of really great personal fulfillment, opportunities to
laugh, to feel appreciated.
If I take on clients that aren't the
right fit for me or they push me
past my limits, I'll not experience the kind
of joy or satisfaction that is important to
me in my business.
I also want to feel seen and valued
(05:25):
for my expertise.
If I'm not maintaining my boundaries, I end
up resenting work and it takes away from
the very reasons that I got into this
to begin with.
So take a hard look at your schedule,
like right now, like hit pause and look
at it.
Go to your calendar and carve out some
time for yourself, whether it's for admin work,
for rest, even just to get outside, you
(05:46):
deserve it.
And once you've made that space, the next
time a potential client reaches out, if they
don't fit into the slots that you've set
aside, don't hesitate to refer them to a
colleague.
It is really, really okay and important to
say no.
Sign number two, you have a lot of
tasks that you dread.
When you first started your private practice, it
(06:06):
was all about freedom, right?
You were going to be in charge of
your schedule.
You're going to work with the clients you
loved.
You're going to finally have control over your
day.
But then the reality of being a solopreneur
sets in, you realize that running a business
isn't just about seeing clients.
It's about handling your case notes, dealing with
insurance companies.
If you take insurance, managing your social media
(06:26):
presence, following up on unpaid claims, dealing with
phone calls, responding to emails, all these tasky
things.
And these have nothing to do with the
passion for therapy.
And as those build up, they can take
over your time and your energy.
So some days it can feel like you're
running a full-on administrative office rather than
a private practice.
The thought of doing more stuff in that
(06:49):
realm might make you throw your computer out
the window.
So you can feel drained by these tasks
that feel completely disconnected from your actual work
with clients.
And I want you to know what to
do about it.
Some of those tasks are always going to
be there.
As a private practice owner, you are responsible
for every aspect of the business.
It's essential to recognize that you don't have
to do everything yourself.
(07:10):
So the key here is to find ways
to automate, delegate, and to eliminate the things
that you hate or you don't have time
for.
Let's start with automation.
Tools like online scheduling can eliminate the back
and forth coordination of appointment times.
Practice management systems automate billing pretty well, or
at least make them so easy.
(07:31):
It's just a few clicks.
And that's whether you take insurance or you
don't.
Practice management systems can also send reminders to
clients about their payments, which can save you
a lot of time spent on trying to
track down money if you're not charging every
single session, which you should be, and making
sure that people know when their appointments are.
So I'm going to recommend therapy notes, which
(07:52):
I've already mentioned, but therapy notes does a
lot of the things that you need, probably
everything you need done in your practice.
You can also outsource, hiring a virtual assistant
to handle some of the less critical but
time-consuming kinds of tasks.
That could be answering phones.
It could be responding to emails.
It could be handling some of your marketing,
managing your calendar.
You might not enjoy some of those tasks,
(08:14):
but feel like for some reason you're supposed
to be doing it.
But there are people out there who love
that stuff.
You can hire somebody to do it for
you.
And that can be a great opportunity for
you.
Let's look at number three, you're burned out.
If you are feeling like you're on the
edge of burnout, you are not alone.
Private practice was kind of supposed to be
your solution to burnout, probably not the cause
(08:35):
of it.
But when we don't build our practice with
intention, it can really turn into that never
-ending stress cycle with exhaustion and overwhelm in
the mix.
So at first it might seem like you're
thriving, you're seeing clients, you're making money, you're
feeling that freedom that you longed for.
But as the months go by, and I
see this with our full folks a fair
amount.
(08:56):
In fact, we have a whole program just
for people who are full and in this
circumstance.
As the months go by, you notice like
your energy levels are dropping, you're emotionally drained
after every session, you're rushing from one client
to the next without taking adequate breaks.
You're working evenings and skipping lunch, and you're
just neglecting the things that you need to
do for your own self-care basically, all
(09:16):
in the name of staying on top of
things and getting ahead.
So then you're burned out.
And while you're making much more money than
you made in agency life, you're probably not
significantly happier.
So my goal is for you to be
happy.
The first step is to stop, like just
pause.
It's easy to get caught up in the
momentum of running your practice, but you've got
(09:36):
to step back and you've got to assess
what's going on.
And if you're burned out, it's a sign
that you've been pushing yourself too hard for
too long without taking proper breaks.
So this person's talking about their boundaries.
I want you to look at what you
actually want for your practice.
This is so important.
I want you to just take a little
bit of time to think about that.
(09:56):
The free worksheet today is going to be
a business burnout check-in that is going
to help you with this, but I want
you to think about, are you working the
days and the hours that you want to
work?
Are you charging the fee that you want
and need to charge?
Sometimes what we want and what we need
is different.
Often therapists need to charge a higher fee
than they're actually charging because there are lots
of expenses in this life, and you need
(10:17):
to save for retirement.
So look at these boundaries, look at how
you're ending sessions, making sure that you're doing
that on time so that you can run
to the bathroom, eat a snack, finish your
note, press the button to charge, whatever you
need to do in between sessions.
But if you're not doing those things, you're
not going to be able to get yourself
out of burnout if you're in this cycle.
(10:38):
Get some support, go to therapy about it.
There are a lot of therapists in therapy
right now about burnout.
Take a real vacation.
I mean, maybe leave your phone on airplane
mode the whole time.
Stay away from anything work-related.
Really take some time, and this doesn't have
to be something expensive if you can't just
jet away to Europe for the summer, but
(11:00):
take some time in a cabin nearby.
Take a staycation, but have real true set
time off so that you can think and
get out of the cycle you're in.
I want you to say no to everything.
Everybody who wants you to do an extra
thing, I want you to just say, oh,
I'm not able to do that right now.
It's fine.
(11:20):
It's loving.
It's kind.
No is fine.
Reconnect with your why.
There's a reason that we all became therapists.
A lot of those reasons are deeply personal
for us, and getting reconnected with that can
really help during these harder times.
So if any of these sound familiar, please
don't feel bad.
It's so common in private practice.
(11:40):
Like I said, we have a whole program
just for therapists who have kind of built
the wrong practice.
They need to make some big changes.
If you want or need support through that
program, send me a message that says limitless,
and we'll talk through whether or not it
makes sense to book a Zoom call to
then go further into whether it's a good
fit.
(12:00):
We only let folks in that program that
we are 100% sure we can help
reach their goals.
Like I said, this week's free worksheet is
business burnout check-in.
If you DM me the word sheets, I
will send it right to you.
And you also have access to all the
other free worksheets that we have when you
do that.
All right.
I hope that you say no and take
(12:21):
good care of yourself.
And I will talk to you later.
If you're ready for a much easier practice,
TherapyNotes is the way to go.
Go to therapynotes.com and use the promo
code abundant for two months free.
I hope that helped.
If you have questions for Ask Allison, or
you want to get your hands on the
worksheet for this episode, go to abundancepracticebuilding.com
(12:45):
slash links.
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