August 28, 2025 • 56 mins
Dwight Peavy was stuck in sin, but God intervened and saved him. Dwight recounts how he was on the verge of abandoning hope when God took him off his path of destruction and into a life of fellowship with God and his people.
What Is Addiction? How Can We Help Each Other? by Michael Hochstetler
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
And here I am talking to you about
Jesus, because I know what he can do.
I don't care how messed up you think you are,
there is nothing impossible for him to do,
because I know I was tore up on the floor, as
they say, but I'm in my right mind today,
serving a risen Savior.
(00:27):
It's an honor to have you here,
Dwight. Thank you so much for joining us.
Several people mentioned your name to us and said
that we really need to
have you come on the podcast
to hear your story of
encountering God's grace and freedom.
So, last week when I sent a message to you asking
if you would be interested
in coming on the podcast,
(00:49):
you quickly responded and said that it sounds
like a good opportunity to
glorify our Lord Jesus Christ.
So, we're delighted that you've approached this
episode with that ambition,
and we're glad that you have joined us now to
talk about how you've experienced God's work.
Yes, and I appreciate the invite, and I thank our
(01:11):
Lord for this opportunity.
But before I start, I would like to read a couple
of verses that I live by.
Okay, and it comes from Psalm 107.
I'll read three verses, the first three verses,
and then I will read verse eight,
(01:35):
and it sets the stake for me. And it says,
"Oh give thanks unto the Lord,
for He is good." And
that's what we want to do today.
Give thanks and praise and honor and glory to the
Lord who saved me, who made this possible.
(01:56):
And that's what I want to
do. That's my heart's desire.
"Let the redeemed of the Lord say so, whom He has
redeemed from the enemy,
and gathered from out of the
lands, from the east and from the west,
from the north and from the
south." And jump down to verse eight,
(02:19):
"Oh that men would praise the Lord for His
goodness, and for His wonderful
works to the children of men."
I can't- even I today, after all these years, 15
(02:40):
years, I am blown away by the
work the Lord has done in my life.
It's amazing.
They talk about He don't work miracles no more.
Well, I beg to differ.
I am evidence of His wonderful works.
Because I know where I came from, where He
(03:01):
brought me from, what He brought me out of.
And He was good to me. His goodness is that He
kept me on this path for 15 years.
Well, that's really good to
hear. Thank you for sharing that.
So you've already alluded to the way that God has
(03:22):
saved you and delivered you,
and I want to get into that story. But to begin,
can you briefly introduce yourself to us,
and then tell us about your early life?
My name, of course, is Dwight Peavy. I come from
a family of 22 siblings, with me makes 22.
(03:43):
I've never met nobody who has more- as many
kids, or [indistinct] my
mother, except the Mennonites.
And I learned that the kids are blessing from
the Lord, are a heritage from the Lord.Amen.
So I'm all for that. And I grew up in Fort Worth,
Texas. I went to school here.
(04:05):
When I turned, I believe it was 15 when I got
into drugs. And I lived a homosexual life
almost 50 years. And I kept hearing all the
people, the preachers
talking about God loves us all.
He does, but He doesn't love the sin we live in.
(04:28):
So in my studies, I learned about that.
Because people are always saying, "We're all
going to heaven. God loves us all." Yes, He does.
That's why He sent Jesus. But there will be no
sin into heaven. If you die that way,
you're not going to heaven. And I truly believe
(04:48):
that. The Scripture says that.
But anyway, I can't explain to you how it all
happened. It's just one day I woke up wanting
to know about this God. And I've been down with
(05:11):
the Lord in and out of sin with the Lord.
It's just the past 15 years, can I say I've been
established and settled in the Lord because of
His goodness and His mercy. Can I say it like
that? Because I've been
waiting. He's been trying to get
my attention for over 50 years. And I come to the
(05:32):
Lord, get tired of sin, come back to the Lord,
go back to sin. And it's been a rollercoaster
ride for 50 years. It's just a path, and I'm
turning 68 in October. So the last 15 years since I
came in contact with the Mennonites,
is when I really took a look at God and they
(05:55):
encouraged me, not saying they're perfect,
because they're not. But they encouraged me to
really choose who I'm going to serve. Can I put it
that way? And it was because of them. Because I
love the way they love the Lord. Can I say that?
(06:19):
And so here I am today. And to talk about, I
don't want to jump the gun, but
even this opportunity right here is a blessing
from the Lord. My name has traveled all the way
to Pennsylvania. That's nothing but the Lord's
work. That's His goodness. That's His mercy.
(06:44):
I'm an ex-drug addict. You know,
I did every drug out of the books.
Crack- you name it, I done it. And drunk
every liquor, there was to drink almost.
And smoking every kind of cigarette, there is to
smoke. But here I am today, talking to you in
Philadelphia or Pennsylvania, talking about how
(07:06):
goodness of God. Is that
not... Nobody can do that
but God. I had a whole team of family behind the
scenes, making sure this time it worked.
And I didn't even know they were there. That's
God's, man. When everything falls in place
and it's perfect, that's God. You're going to
have to tell me He stopped
(07:27):
sometimes because I can't
really get carried away talking about the Lord
and His goodness. Because I know I'm not the only
one He saved. There are others that can talk
about it. I went to a
couple of churches in my youth,
but it was just a way to get out of the house, go
(07:48):
somewhere. And they used to have testimony
time back in the day. You hardly hear it,
these days. You hardly hear it. Nobody's
talking about the goodness of God. Everybody's
talking about "We're all included. God is all
inclusive." No, He's not. The only thing inclusive
(08:09):
about God is He sent His Son for all mankind.
And all mankind has the
opportunity to accept it or reject it.
Amen.
Go ahead, brother. [indistinct]
Thank you for sharing that introduction. You
talked about how your reputation has come all
(08:30):
the way to Pennsylvania, but it's God's
reputation too. When we heard about you,
it was definitely paired with the way that God
has saved you and has changed your life.
And so you already alluded to this some, but at
some point you found yourself in serious bondage,
but you aren't there anymore. So tell us about
(08:52):
your journey away from the bondage to freedom in
Christ. Wow. I have to say this first. I realized
this reading the
scripture, studying the scripture.
This is not going to be without a fight. You
(09:14):
know, and they don't tell
you that in most churches
today, they don't tell you about the fight.
You've got to fight for this is not free
to go from doing, you know, I was doing so many
drugs. I even said to myself, well, you know,
it's no hope for me. There's no way out of this.
(09:35):
So I'm going to enjoy[?] something.
I was going to die a drug addict, a homosexual. That's
what I thought. Little did I know that Christ had
a different plan for me. And I thought I was
going to be a drug addict
all my life, a homosexual
all my life. But God is mercy and his goodness
(09:59):
and his favor said, no, no, you belong to us.
And like I said, it's been a fight because two
years I'd be walking straight with the Lord
and something happened and I just ended up acting
sick. It's been a fight.
(10:20):
And I could just say I am most grateful for God
that he loved me so much that while I was yet
a sinner, he sent Christ to die for me, to reconcile
me back to him. And not just me but for all of
(10:40):
mankind. When I, well, tomorrow we're going to
feed the homeless. And I asked God many times,
Lord, I know the way out of here and I don't care
how messed up you are. I don't care how mentally
crazy you may be acting in public. Remember the
guy that was sitting on the island and he
(11:01):
would cut himself and all that stuff out of his
mind. Christ saves him. He can save- there's
nothing impossible for God. I thought I was-
drugged out doing every kind
of drug you could think of,
mixing drugs and everything. It amazes me when I
(11:22):
look, I remember the biggest thing that was on me
was my eyes. I was sucked up with drugs. I
was like that big. And I cannot say or tell
people to understand the goodness of God. God is
(11:43):
so good. So good. I mean,
to wake up every day and not trip over beer
bottles and beer cans and crack pipes and needles
and things like that is an amazing thing. Amazing
grace. How sweet the hour
that saved a wretch like
me. Amen. Go ahead, brother. Yeah. Thank you so
(12:07):
much for sharing that the grace and the power of
God is amazing and saving us. And I'm glad you're
keeping the emphasis
there. So you've talked about
how you were in bondage to drugs, addicted to
drugs, but now you're not. How did you get free?
How did you encounter God's grace to find the
freedom? He hooked me up with the Mennonites.
(12:31):
And again, I said they encouraged me. I heard
stories from preachers that God loves you. And
I heard things about if you're saved, God will
save you if you live in sin, they're here to
bring you home. And I don't agree with all that.
(12:53):
I met the Mennonites in 2010 or 11.
And there were times I would
stumble and fall and go back to sin.
But they had a love that I had never seen among
Christians before. And they would tell me things
(13:15):
that you can't keep doing this. You know, nobody
told me that I can't keep doing this.
Nobody said, "God doesn't love sin." You know,
nobody says stuff like that. And
15 years to be drug-free, alcohol-free,
(13:36):
homosexuality-free, in my right mind,
praising God of all things, He's made Himself so
real to me. You know, and to talk about the
transition, the transition was not easy. Because
(13:56):
you have to remember we have an enemy who walks
about seeking who he can steal, kill, and destroy.
And he works overtime. I remember when America's
wanting to get Osama Bin Laden.
By any means necessary. We got to take them out.
That's how the devil operates. By any means
(14:18):
necessary. And boy, he was on my back and I'd
be in and out of sin, like I said, with the Lord
today. You know what the
good thing about all this
is? He never gave up on me. When I gave up on
myself, he was there for me. He walked in the
forest with me. I look back on my life today and
(14:41):
I can see him there. I can see him there. He has
made himself so real. You know, I can't even, the
Mennonites played a big role in my
transition. They didn't know it but they did. God
used them. And I made a, I fell at this church
(15:03):
I'm a member of now. And God told me to confess my
sins to the congregation. I did that in front of
all those people, the only black guy there. And
I'm telling all these white people that I sinned,
(15:24):
that I asked for their forgiveness and I ask God
for his forgiveness. And from that moment on,
I never did drugs again. Now, because it's
something about confessing your sins
is that helps the healing process, the addiction
process. When you acknowledge, the Bible says,
(15:47):
James said, acknowledge your sins because if you
want to be healed, so I'm crazy. I believed it.
So I did it. And here I am today. And you still
have tests. Things like sorry, that,
oh, I just came to a test, wanting to go back
(16:09):
after 15 years. And I kept like David,
encouraging myself in the Lord, Scriptures, I
quote Scriptures to myself and all this.
And I made it through. And then you call. I see
that as a reward for God's goodness for me,
(16:32):
fighting the fight and not give up. I was going
to ask more about confession.
So you felt like you should confess to your
brothers and sisters in the church. And you
see that as a, as a piece of staying free and
moving beyond falling. What connection do you see
(16:54):
between confession and the victory you're
experiencing? Why connection? Yes. God is
the connection because he's the one who said,
confess your sins to one another, that you may be
healed. And being one that's starting to trust
in the Lord and
(17:15):
count on him to depend on him.
We have a part to play in this, believe it or
not. That's God's part. That's Jesus' part.
That's the Holy Spirit's part. And then there's
our part. If we don't do our part,
change will not come. We have to do our part.
(17:37):
He's, for example, he says,
control the deeds of your flesh. Stay away from
the appearance of sin. Do this. Don't do it.
There's a lot you have to do and don't do in the
Bible. And there's work. The good,
Titus says he saved us unto good works.
(17:59):
Works don't save us, but works come after we're saved.
And yeah, God is the reason. And he's the
connection between me and my freedom from sin.
It's all him. He brought the Mennonites in my life
(18:23):
because, first of all, I want to say he
had a respect for the Mennonites because they're
not perfect, but they're a lot closer to him,
I think, than most denominations. You know what
I'm saying? That making sense?
And I know the way because I read His word. I
(18:48):
mean, they do the best they can to serve God,
and I respect that. And I believe, God respects
that too. Because there
are some groups of Mennonites
that are just flippin' out. Going to the world, I
know that too. Well so far
the ones God had brought me in touch with, they
are sold out for Jesus. And those are the people
(19:12):
I want to hang around with. That encouraged me to
get up and dust myself over and keep stepping.
So I'm trying to piece together pieces of your
story. I think you alluded to already. But before
you found the Mennonite Church, did I hear
correctly that you were with several other
(19:32):
churches or with other Christians, other churches
prior to that? Can you
talk about that experience?
I was a member of the... Okay, I was homeless. I
had drunk... What's the word? I got so addicted
I ended up homeless. And then I was
(19:55):
standing at the shelter, and
churches used to drive around on weekends to see
if anyone wanted to go to church.
They from all different churches, all different
denominations. And there was one,
the guy was driving around once, and something about
this, I said, "Well, the
(20:16):
Baptist, like the Mennonite,
they love to eat." And so they told us they had
food and things like that,
and we wanted to go to church.
And my plan, believe it or not, was to go and see
what they had to eat. I wasn't interested in
those services. I wanted to see what they had to
eat. And would you believe from that moment,
(20:39):
going to see what they had to eat, I stayed a
member of that church five years?
Because I tell you what, they had... In all their craziness, and
they had something I recognized. I don't know how
I recognized it. I ended up becoming an associate
(21:02):
pastor to the pastor there. And to this day,
I went to his funeral, his wife's blessing us
with financial support. That's how we feed the
homeless to this day. It's been 20 years since I
met them. And who knew? 20
(21:25):
years later, we would be...
Let me tell you this. The Baptists, to me, I know
they have their faults, every denomination does,
and they have their belief that every
denomination had believed
something different. I know this.
But I have a respect for
(21:46):
them and some of their beliefs.
You know, there are some I don't agree with.
That's true. But that church,
the Believer's Baptist Church,
was such a blessing to me. Five years, I stayed
sober because the love
(22:09):
they showed me at that church.
I wanted to be a Christian. I desired to be a
Christian. But as soon as the pastor moved
to Louisiana- his grandson was diagnosed with
leukemia. And they were up in the [indistinct]. They
didn't want to keep driving back and forth. So
they just moved back to Lousiana. As soon as
(22:30):
they did, I failed because I didn't have that
accountability. I can't even say that.
The accountability anymore. You know what I mean?
And that's what the Mennonites
give me a lot of is accountability. They hold me
accountable. Since I've been hanging out with
(22:50):
them, I've been on the prison ministry. Can you
imagine me going to prison? I spent my whole
life trying not to go to prison. And here I am,
God sent me to a prison. It's amazing.
I think that the theme that you mentioned with
both your time with the Mennonite Church and the
Baptist Church is accountability and brothers and
(23:12):
sisters around you to support you, to walk
with you as you pursued Jesus. Yeah, they didn't
condemn me. Galatians, I believe the sixth one
said, "Carry one another's burdens." You know
that? Oh, yes. We're to
(23:34):
carry each other's burdens.
We're supposed to help each other. When one of
the brothers, we see him fall, we're not going to
condemn him, judge him. We're supposed to pick
him up and help him get back on his feet.
That's what Jesus told us to do. Paul preached
it, but his gospel is God accepts the gospel
(24:00):
he preaches. He said, "Anybody preach any other
gospel than what I preach,
you let them be accursed."
So that gives to me, that gives Paul's gospel a
lot of credibility. It says it's approved by God.
You know, he said God is not
(24:21):
going to send no angel from heaven
or anybody else to preach a
different gospel than what I have preached.
Right? That gives his gospel a lot of
credibility. So when Paul
said, it's as good as God saying it.
Paul is a great man. I'm sure he
(24:44):
had his mistakes and doubts at times.
We all do, but we just got to keep, I learned
that we got to continue to press toward the mark.
If we fall, get up, dust yourself off. Say to satan
"You're a liar." We keep
on heading toward the mark,
which is Jesus Christ. The Bible says that. You
(25:06):
know, this is what you do if you fall.
This is what you do if you, John said, "Confess
your sins." He said, "Anybody that says they
don't live in sin, that don't sin is a liar, and
the truth is not in them." Right?
Right, yes.
Okay. So confess them. And a lot of Christians
(25:29):
don't want to confess them because
the church doesn't handle that well, and you got
to go in some way else. We don't want that in our
church. That's not what Christ said. Christ said,
"Carry one another's burdens."
I wanted to ask you, how did that look in
practical terms? So with
(25:49):
the churches you've been at,
you've mentioned the brothers and sisters who
have helped to carry your burdens to provide
accountability. Practically speaking, how did
that, how did they provide
that for you in helping to
carry your burdens?
Prayer. They prayed for me. Even when I wasn't
around. And Christ said this, Paul said this,
(26:13):
and this will explain. "If the same spirit dwells
in you that raised Christ from the dead,"
to me, the gospel is talking about how Christ
would discern the hearts of the Pharisees before
(26:34):
they even got close to him. If that same spirit
is in us, we should pick up on when the brother
is struggling. There should be signs and flags to
us as Christians who have filled with the Holy
(26:55):
Spirit to sense, if you will, that one of our
brothers is something going on with him,
something's not right with him. And they would do
that. The Mennonites do that. Not all
Baptist churches, but that one I went to, they
(27:15):
sense things were going on
with me that wasn't right.
And they would address those issues. They weren't
out to make everybody happy.
They believed what the Bible said too. Psalm said
that if man would, in other words,
(27:39):
if man would testify the goodness of God. God has
been so good to me, I'm running out of,
I lost count of how good he's been to me. I mean,
he said, "I'll open the windows and pour
out grace that you cannot contain." I'm having to
give them away 'cause it's so many
But you know what?
He's not doing it because he want to do it. He's
(28:01):
doing it to reward us for our obedience.
Like talking to you. I never dreamed of this.
That's nothing but God. That's nothing but God.
God is amazing. And he wants to make his, Jesus
(28:22):
said in John chapter one, that I have declared
unto you the Lord. That's why I came here. I've
declared who God is. God
is holy. God is righteous.
God is without sin. That's who he wants us to be.
Like God, our father. Be holy as he is holy.
(28:43):
And you know, that's what I'm practicing to do.
I'm not practicing in drug.
Sin is hard. It's hard. I don't understand why I
didn't[?] end up in prison for a robbery to keep my
drug habit. And you know what I'm saying? A lot
(29:05):
of people ended up in jail because of drugs.
They want to supply their addiction and they'll
do whatever they have to do to do that.
I don't know why I didn't do all that. I could
just say God was with me
even when I was a sinner.
And he was with Jonah when he sinned and decided
(29:28):
that and was disobedient and didn't want to go to
Nineveh and preach the gospel. So he ran away
from God. How many times
have I ran away from God?
I lost count. But you know what? God gives us all
an opportunity to repent. And that's what he did
for me. I don't know if he'll give you 50 years
(29:50):
to repent if you were sinning, but he did me.
Because this journey has been a long one. It's
been a hard one. And God never left my side.
He never left my side. So accountability is
key. Not just talking to people that are lost,
(30:13):
but the Christians as well. We got to keep them
in check. We got to keep ourselves in check.
Paul said examine yourself to make sure you're
in the faith. You know what I mean?
That what he said. We got to keep
an eye on each other. We're family.
(30:33):
We may be all different colors, but we're family.
Amen. If you belong to Jesus. Amen.
It sounds like your path has been a bit winding
and long. You talked about how early in life God
was beginning to pursue you. And he still is. And
you've been free now for quite a while.
(30:54):
But if I understand correctly, your story also
includes times of relapsing back into sin and
getting stuck again. What have you found to be
most important in staying free and getting free
again after you've fallen? Jesus can answer that
best. He said, any man who's not willing to give
(31:19):
up his family for him, his friends that he used
to hang out with, you got to stop. You got, Paul
said it this way, put off the old man and put on the
new man, which is created after God in holiness and righteousness.
(31:41):
You got to stop hanging out with people you used
to hang out with. You can't be a Christian
and a follower of Jesus and keep the friends you
had back in the day. You got to let them go.
They have no good intentions for your Christian
walk. They want to get you back into drugs.
(32:02):
I was one of those people that bought drugs a lot
for people. I was the reason for the party,
if you will. And I would say, you got to give up
some things to stay free. You know what I mean?
You got to let them go. Even if you're alone, I
find myself not lonely, but alone a lot. All I do
(32:27):
is go to work and go to church and maybe go out to
Denver here and there.
But I don't surround myself,
even with family that doesn't want to live for
Jesus. Yeah, I mean, that's the price you pay.
It's not free. You got to give up. You may have
to walk away from your
daughter or your son or your
(32:48):
mother or your father or your cousin or your
girlfriend. Because now you're with Jesus,
he says sex outside of marriage is a sin.
Right? So you got to give up that girlfriend.
And that takes a lot to do. You know what I'm
(33:10):
saying? Y'all might have a baby. Take care of
the baby, but you can no longer sleep together.
So you got to be willing to pay- Paul says
count the cost. That means there's a price to pay
to follow Jesus. You know, I said I did that the
other day last week. I counted the cost of
(33:35):
whatever it cost me to go back into sin. And I
thought to myself, the price is too high. I'm not
willing to pay to give up Jesus for a five minute
fling and perverted sex. I just wasn't willing to do
that. You know, and the price is too high.
(33:55):
Sin costs too much and will keep you longer than
you want it to be there. Got to read Proverbs
seven. So we got, we got to count the costs,
examine ourselves to make sure we're in the faith.
Jesus said, who he set free is free indeed.
(34:16):
But the way you stay free is you got to do what
the scripture says. You know, you can't just go
around talking like "I'm a Christian" and living like
crazy out there. You can't do that. That's not-
Jesus is holy righteous and without sin.
And to be a part of that family, we have to be
(34:36):
the same way. That's what the scripture says.
And to stay away from sin, you got to avoid even
the appearance of it. For example, you say,
I'm going to get some chips, but you stop at
the liquor store. Your intention is going in there
and get some chips because that's the closest store.
(34:57):
But what if a church member drove by
and saw you going in there? They don't see you
bringing chips out. They just see a brown bag
and then a rumor start. You see what I'm saying?
Yeah. Avoid the appearance. Even though you
just want some chips, what if a church member
(35:19):
drove by. "Oh, I saw
Jaran going down to the liquor store."
Then the rumor start because of the appearance.
You know what I'm saying? Yeah. So accountability
again is key. It's very important and hold
yourself accountable. So yeah.
(35:45):
I think those were wise words. One thing I hear
you emphasizing is the importance
of accountability. You also spoke about, you
know, sometimes people around us can be a bad
influence. And I'm, I'm hearing a contrast here.
On one hand, you have God's people,
you have the community of Christians who are
(36:07):
helping support you and bearing your burdens
and holding you accountable. And on the other
hand, you can have people around you who want
to pull you down and drag you back into sin. And
so for wanting to stay
free and to live for Jesus,
part of counting the cost is understanding that
there might be implications that we don't like
(36:30):
in having to distance ourselves from people who
are continually or just making it their
business to drag you back into sin. And giving up
those relationships might be a painful thing.
That's what Jesus meant when he said, if you're
not willing to give up your family,
(36:55):
there are brothers and sisters that I stopped
socializing with because they weren't
going where I wanted to go. So therefore they
weren't helping me to get where I need to get.
I wanted to get in heaven with Jesus. And that's
why he, that's why I
don't believe in once saved
(37:15):
always saved, because every scripture I read and
there are hundreds of
them talks about continuing,
talks about enduring, talking about continuing
the work, continue to do
this, continue to do that.
Christ has a, how can I say, God has a, it's like
(37:39):
I told my sister this morning,
some people want to move in your house and tell
you how to run it. That's what some Christians
are. They wanted God, but they don't want a house
full of rules. But God has rules.
(38:00):
Just read the book. And here in order to get to
heaven, we have to follow the rules.
You know what I'm saying? I
know I sound sometimes radical,
but you have to be that way. If you want to get
to heaven, this is a fight.
(38:23):
You know, and a lot of Christians, I'm talking
about me, but I used to fall for this too.
A lot of Christians say the battle is the Lord's.
The scripture says that.
But then when you continue to study, why does the
scripture say put on the whole armor of God?
(38:44):
You don't put on armor unless you going to war.
Right? So what does that mean?
That we just let the Lord handle it? Our part of
the war is to abstain from all forms of evil,
of sin. Our point of battle could be letting go
(39:06):
of family. You have to fight.
You know, I know I love my brothers and sisters,
but I'm not going to go to a nightclub with them.
I'm not going to go do drugs with them. You know what I'm
saying? You have to count the cost.
I'm glad you're talking about this as a battle. I
(39:27):
think that many in our audience,
many of the people who will be listening to this,
will really connect with that because,
you know, many are fighting a battle and
sometimes there's victory
and sometimes there's losses.
I'm curious, what would you say to the ones who
(39:47):
are listening, who find
themselves fighting a battle,
but experiencing more losses than wins? And it's
like they want to do what's right. They know
what's right. They want to live for God, but it
just feels like they can't win and be victorious
and be free of sin. What would you say to those
(40:08):
who are experiencing life that way?
I would say what Jesus said. You can overcome
because I have overcame. First of all,
I would tell them to really
trust in Jesus. The second thing is,
(40:29):
and this is a problem for a lot of Christians,
they say, "I can do this. God is all I need." No, he's not.
God works through people. He's always done that.
And there are other Christians that God will work
through to help you be victorious. Again, that
(40:53):
brings sin to accountability. You have to begin by
examining yourself and the church is both be
understanding like Jesus and help you get back
on the right track. Just think if Jesus gave up
(41:14):
on me at the 400th time... I know he has a line
that you don't want to cross, but he's the one
that says, "Forgive, seventy times seven."
Just think if he'd have gave up on us. We need
(41:34):
each other. Jesus is not all you need.
You need each other because he's working through
other Christians. You know what I'm saying?
So we had to hold ourselves accountable first.
And we need to stop thinking that nobody cares.
(41:56):
They don't care. They just want you to come to church
and pay tithe. Some people in that church do care
because you can't be a Christian and not care.
When Jesus' heart was all about care,
we need to carry one another's burden again. I
(42:16):
said it twice already. And the blame doesn't
fall all on the church. The blame falls on us
because we need to confess our sins to other
people. And we're only going to be healed when we
do that, Paul said. And it starts with holding
(42:40):
yourself accountable. I felt... I heard all the
lies the devil told me
that they're going to laugh
at you. They're going to tell you, "Stop going to
the church." But here's
where the healing came in.
I was determined to do what the Bible said do,
"to confess my sins to one another."
(43:06):
And that's when the healing came. If you listen
to the devil and say, "Oh,
they're going to laugh at
me. They're going to call me an [indistinct] person.
They're going to do
this." Just do what Jesus said.
And I guarantee you, you'll have a healing. It
won't happen overnight. Some people it does.
(43:29):
But know this, if you do your part, God will do
his part. And that's
important. That is one of the
first things I learned when I started studying
the Bible is I have a part to play in this.
And I have to do my part or else- my part is confess
(43:53):
sins. If I don't do that, the healing won't come.
The Bible is very simple to me. But it took years
of falling and stumbling and
not giving up and continuing to press for the
mark. We can't quit. We
(44:13):
have to continue. Jesus said,
"If you continue, if you continue in my word,"
don't quit. Don't quit. Continue. Even if you do
screw up and sin, go to your church or go to a
Christian and confess your sins "and you too
(44:37):
shall be healed." God still works miracles today.
He still heals. He still turns water into wine.
But not in the sense that we think. But God works
like he works. And we can't tell God to hurry up
or [indistinct] God works in his own time.
(45:01):
But he has a time that Jesus is coming back
and if we're not ready, there will be no more
time to get ready. So we
need each other to help us
fight the good fight of faith. Right? We need
each other. And we as Christians have to be
(45:22):
compassionate and understanding with everybody
because how can I tell drug addicts that you're
going to go to hell? God doesn't want to do it.
When he dealt 15 years with me, in my sins,
he has a time, a season if you will, for everyone
(45:44):
to finally say, "Lord, I need you." That was a
season for the thief on the cross, even though he
wasn't baptized, even though he didn't do any good works
But God counted whatever he said as
righteousness and accept the thief on the cross.
(46:07):
We have to do our part in order to have victory.
Our part. Yeah. And your life is a testimony to
doing your part and persevering, but also
testimony to God's power and God working miracles
and God still doing that. Yes. Yes, he is. I love
(46:28):
that you keep calling us to remember God's power
and his willingness and eagerness to work
miracles in our lives. So we
mentioned the people who will
resonate with what you're saying because they
themselves are experiencing addiction and bondage
and sin. But I think that there's also people who
are listening who aren't really experiencing it
(46:49):
in that way for themselves, but they have loved
ones or friends who are just really stuck
in sin and wanting to be free. Do you have advice
for those people who want to help those around
them find freedom? Tell them to watch the podcast
and listen to my story. Listen to how I
(47:13):
fell and struggled. And if those people are
Christians, you can't make nobody stop doing
drugs. You can't make nobody say, I'm going to be
a Christian, but you can give good advice.
Whether they take it or not is on them. Their part
(47:33):
is to take it or reject it.
Do you have a choice? We all have a choice. And
our choices are Jesus or
Satan. There's nothing in
between that. And we need to tell people. That's
why I want to go to the streets, if you will,
(47:57):
because I lived there. I lived down there with
those homeless peoples back in
2000, 1999 when I became homeless. And I lived
down there and I bought the drugs down there.
But all the time I was down there, I would go in
my, where they had me to
sleep and read the Bible.
(48:17):
I'd be drunk out of my mind reading the Bible.
Think about that man on the island that was
cutting himself, running around naked. But when
he came at the feet of Jesus,
Jesus changed his life.
If you want it, you are the only one that can
(48:41):
stop you from getting it or getting it.
You got to be tired of being tired. They say that
at Alcoholics Anonymous.
You just got to be tired of being tired.
You got to be tired of living like
that. You don't have to live in addiction. You
don't have to live in drugs. And yes, it's going
(49:01):
to be hard when you first start out.
But focus on the end of the race.
It doesn't matter what position you
come in with, your first,
second, third, or last. What matters is that you come in.
And we need to have people,
(49:23):
to help those people that want that to come in.
But we can't help them if they don't want to make
the decision to do it differently. You know what
I'm saying? We can tell them what- I can't tell
nobody to go to therapy. I can't tell nobody to
go to rehab. I can't tell
(49:44):
nobody to go to counseling
because I never did all that. I went to Jesus.
And it didn't happen overnight. It took 50 some
years for me to finally get to this point. We
need to take the time,
the season, today, today for
salvation. Who knows if God won't be back before
(50:05):
the next 50 years. I'm just thankful that I came
to my senses and I can pause there. You could be
sure they're just saved. And I'm sure I'm saved.
Again, it's up to them. You can give them advice
(50:27):
and tell them the cause. But still,
the bottom line is they have to make the decision
to not want to live like that anymore. You know
what I'm saying? But some people so in bondage. I
can't tell you, brother, how many days I spent
in motels shooting up. I used to mix crack and
(50:48):
heroin together. It's crazy.
Well, it's crazy that bad man sitting on the island cutting himself,
running around naked, screaming and hollering at
people, acting like a madman.
I was just as crazy as he was. But look at me now.
(51:11):
And when I look at me, I see Jesus all over
there. I was totally strung out, brother.
I was gone. I was homeless in LA.
I was homeless in Kansas. I got tired of
that life. So I did come
(51:32):
to the decision I'm just going to die a drug
addict and a homosexual.
Jesus could change all that.
But you got to do your part. We got to do our
part. We got to come to
him, ask him for forgiveness.
And then he'll start putting
(51:52):
people in our lives that can help us.
We need more than Jesus. We need each other.
Addiction is nothing to play with.
Yeah. It'll cost you everything.
Everything. Living a homosexual life. One thing I
(52:12):
knew was if I had drugs, I could have anybody.
I've seen men leave their families to spend the
night with me because I had the drugs.
Again, don't look bad at me. I went to Jesus.
(52:35):
And I repented of all those sins.
And here I am talking to you about
Jesus because I know what he can do.
I don't care how messed up you think you are.
There's nothing impossible for him to do.
Because I know I was tore up on the floor, as
they say. But I'm in my right mind today,
(52:57):
serving a risen Savior, trying to tell people
about Jesus. Like I started saying earlier,
but I lost track. That's why I like going down to
the streets. Because I remember the time I
lived down there. And I want to tell them
there's a way out. But I
(53:17):
can't make them come out.
I can show them the way. But ultimately, it's
their decision. You know what I'm saying?
Yeah. It'll be that decision.
These are very wise words Dwight. And I think
these are good words to end on.
As I listen to you talk, I think about the verse
(53:38):
in Revelation that we've
mentioned on this podcast
before. It says, "They overcame him by the blood
of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony."
"Word of their testimony."
We've seen the blood of the Lamb's power in your
life. And I think there's also overcoming power
in the word of your testimony. You have overcome.
Jesus has helped you to overcome and helps you
(54:00):
to continue to overcome as you share the word of
your testimony. So thank you so much for coming
on the podcast and sharing your testimony with us
today. Oh, brother. I owe it all to him.
I wouldn't have no testimony if it had not been
for him. And Jimmy Swaggart has a song he sings.
(54:26):
And the name of it is, "I want to just thank you,
Lord, for saving me from what I might have been."
It's scary to think of what I might have been,
had I not come to Jesus. It's just scary.
Yeah. And so trust Jesus, everybody. Turn to
(54:49):
Jesus. Train your eyes upon the Lord
and the things of the
world will grow strangely dim.
Amen. Yes, they will. And I hope we can get
together again, my brother.
I hope so too. And I hope to
meet you in person someday.
It's been, a delight to talk with you here on this
call. Thank you so much for joining us.
You're welcome. To God be the glory. You can have
(55:13):
what I have, but you got to pay the cost,
pay the price. He can set you free. Yes. And it
is worth the cost. God bless you and
where you are, brother. And thank you for
inviting me here. It's been a pleasure.
Thank you for listening to this episode with
Dwight Peavy.
(55:34):
In April of 2025, we recorded an episode with Michael Hochstetler
called, "What is addiction? How can we help each
other?" For practical tips on helping those
around you who are facing
addiction, feel free to check
out that episode. You can also find all of our
other episodes and essays at
(55:54):
anabaptistperspectives.org.
Thank you for listening to this episode of
Anabaptist Perspectives.
We will see you next week in another episode.
And here I am talking to you about
Jesus, because I know what he can do.
I don't care how messed up you think you are,
there is nothing impossible for him to do,
because I know I was tore up on the floor, as
they say, but I'm in my right mind today,
serving a risen Savior.
(00:27):
It's an honor to have you here,
Dwight. Thank you so much for joining us.
Several people mentioned your name to us and said
that we really need to
have you come on the podcast
to hear your story of
encountering God's grace and freedom.
So, last week when I sent a message to you asking
if you would be interested
in coming on the podcast,
(00:49):
you quickly responded and said that it sounds
like a good opportunity to
glorify our Lord Jesus Christ.
So, we're delighted that you've approached this
episode with that ambition,
and we're glad that you have joined us now to
talk about how you've experienced God's work.
Yes, and I appreciate the invite, and I thank our
(01:11):
Lord for this opportunity.
But before I start, I would like to read a couple
of verses that I live by.
Okay, and it comes from Psalm 107.
I'll read three verses, the first three verses,
and then I will read verse eight,
(01:35):
and it sets the stake for me. And it says,
"Oh give thanks unto the Lord,
for He is good." And
that's what we want to do today.
Give thanks and praise and honor and glory to the
Lord who saved me, who made this possible.
(01:56):
And that's what I want to
do. That's my heart's desire.
"Let the redeemed of the Lord say so, whom He has
redeemed from the enemy,
and gathered from out of the
lands, from the east and from the west,
from the north and from the
south." And jump down to verse eight,
(02:19):
"Oh that men would praise the Lord for His
goodness, and for His wonderful
works to the children of men."
I can't- even I today, after all these years, 15
(02:40):
years, I am blown away by the
work the Lord has done in my life.
It's amazing.
They talk about He don't work miracles no more.
Well, I beg to differ.
I am evidence of His wonderful works.
Because I know where I came from, where He
(03:01):
brought me from, what He brought me out of.
And He was good to me. His goodness is that He
kept me on this path for 15 years.
Well, that's really good to
hear. Thank you for sharing that.
So you've already alluded to the way that God has
(03:22):
saved you and delivered you,
and I want to get into that story. But to begin,
can you briefly introduce yourself to us,
and then tell us about your early life?
My name, of course, is Dwight Peavy. I come from
a family of 22 siblings, with me makes 22.
(03:43):
I've never met nobody who has more- as many
kids, or [indistinct] my
mother, except the Mennonites.
And I learned that the kids are blessing from
the Lord, are a heritage from the Lord.Amen.
So I'm all for that. And I grew up in Fort Worth,
Texas. I went to school here.
(04:05):
When I turned, I believe it was 15 when I got
into drugs. And I lived a homosexual life
almost 50 years. And I kept hearing all the
people, the preachers
talking about God loves us all.
He does, but He doesn't love the sin we live in.
(04:28):
So in my studies, I learned about that.
Because people are always saying, "We're all
going to heaven. God loves us all." Yes, He does.
That's why He sent Jesus. But there will be no
sin into heaven. If you die that way,
you're not going to heaven. And I truly believe
(04:48):
that. The Scripture says that.
But anyway, I can't explain to you how it all
happened. It's just one day I woke up wanting
to know about this God. And I've been down with
(05:11):
the Lord in and out of sin with the Lord.
It's just the past 15 years, can I say I've been
established and settled in the Lord because of
His goodness and His mercy. Can I say it like
that? Because I've been
waiting. He's been trying to get
my attention for over 50 years. And I come to the
(05:32):
Lord, get tired of sin, come back to the Lord,
go back to sin. And it's been a rollercoaster
ride for 50 years. It's just a path, and I'm
turning 68 in October. So the last 15 years since I
came in contact with the Mennonites,
is when I really took a look at God and they
(05:55):
encouraged me, not saying they're perfect,
because they're not. But they encouraged me to
really choose who I'm going to serve. Can I put it
that way? And it was because of them. Because I
love the way they love the Lord. Can I say that?
(06:19):
And so here I am today. And to talk about, I
don't want to jump the gun, but
even this opportunity right here is a blessing
from the Lord. My name has traveled all the way
to Pennsylvania. That's nothing but the Lord's
work. That's His goodness. That's His mercy.
(06:44):
I'm an ex-drug addict. You know,
I did every drug out of the books.
Crack- you name it, I done it. And drunk
every liquor, there was to drink almost.
And smoking every kind of cigarette, there is to
smoke. But here I am today, talking to you in
Philadelphia or Pennsylvania, talking about how
(07:06):
goodness of God. Is that
not... Nobody can do that
but God. I had a whole team of family behind the
scenes, making sure this time it worked.
And I didn't even know they were there. That's
God's, man. When everything falls in place
and it's perfect, that's God. You're going to
have to tell me He stopped
(07:27):
sometimes because I can't
really get carried away talking about the Lord
and His goodness. Because I know I'm not the only
one He saved. There are others that can talk
about it. I went to a
couple of churches in my youth,
but it was just a way to get out of the house, go
(07:48):
somewhere. And they used to have testimony
time back in the day. You hardly hear it,
these days. You hardly hear it. Nobody's
talking about the goodness of God. Everybody's
talking about "We're all included. God is all
inclusive." No, He's not. The only thing inclusive
(08:09):
about God is He sent His Son for all mankind.
And all mankind has the
opportunity to accept it or reject it.
Amen.
Go ahead, brother. [indistinct]
Thank you for sharing that introduction. You
talked about how your reputation has come all
(08:30):
the way to Pennsylvania, but it's God's
reputation too. When we heard about you,
it was definitely paired with the way that God
has saved you and has changed your life.
And so you already alluded to this some, but at
some point you found yourself in serious bondage,
but you aren't there anymore. So tell us about
(08:52):
your journey away from the bondage to freedom in
Christ. Wow. I have to say this first. I realized
this reading the
scripture, studying the scripture.
This is not going to be without a fight. You
(09:14):
know, and they don't tell
you that in most churches
today, they don't tell you about the fight.
You've got to fight for this is not free
to go from doing, you know, I was doing so many
drugs. I even said to myself, well, you know,
it's no hope for me. There's no way out of this.
(09:35):
So I'm going to enjoy[?] something.
I was going to die a drug addict, a homosexual. That's
what I thought. Little did I know that Christ had
a different plan for me. And I thought I was
going to be a drug addict
all my life, a homosexual
all my life. But God is mercy and his goodness
(09:59):
and his favor said, no, no, you belong to us.
And like I said, it's been a fight because two
years I'd be walking straight with the Lord
and something happened and I just ended up acting
sick. It's been a fight.
(10:20):
And I could just say I am most grateful for God
that he loved me so much that while I was yet
a sinner, he sent Christ to die for me, to reconcile
me back to him. And not just me but for all of
(10:40):
mankind. When I, well, tomorrow we're going to
feed the homeless. And I asked God many times,
Lord, I know the way out of here and I don't care
how messed up you are. I don't care how mentally
crazy you may be acting in public. Remember the
guy that was sitting on the island and he
(11:01):
would cut himself and all that stuff out of his
mind. Christ saves him. He can save- there's
nothing impossible for God. I thought I was-
drugged out doing every kind
of drug you could think of,
mixing drugs and everything. It amazes me when I
(11:22):
look, I remember the biggest thing that was on me
was my eyes. I was sucked up with drugs. I
was like that big. And I cannot say or tell
people to understand the goodness of God. God is
(11:43):
so good. So good. I mean,
to wake up every day and not trip over beer
bottles and beer cans and crack pipes and needles
and things like that is an amazing thing. Amazing
grace. How sweet the hour
that saved a wretch like
me. Amen. Go ahead, brother. Yeah. Thank you so
(12:07):
much for sharing that the grace and the power of
God is amazing and saving us. And I'm glad you're
keeping the emphasis
there. So you've talked about
how you were in bondage to drugs, addicted to
drugs, but now you're not. How did you get free?
How did you encounter God's grace to find the
freedom? He hooked me up with the Mennonites.
(12:31):
And again, I said they encouraged me. I heard
stories from preachers that God loves you. And
I heard things about if you're saved, God will
save you if you live in sin, they're here to
bring you home. And I don't agree with all that.
(12:53):
I met the Mennonites in 2010 or 11.
And there were times I would
stumble and fall and go back to sin.
But they had a love that I had never seen among
Christians before. And they would tell me things
(13:15):
that you can't keep doing this. You know, nobody
told me that I can't keep doing this.
Nobody said, "God doesn't love sin." You know,
nobody says stuff like that. And
15 years to be drug-free, alcohol-free,
(13:36):
homosexuality-free, in my right mind,
praising God of all things, He's made Himself so
real to me. You know, and to talk about the
transition, the transition was not easy. Because
(13:56):
you have to remember we have an enemy who walks
about seeking who he can steal, kill, and destroy.
And he works overtime. I remember when America's
wanting to get Osama Bin Laden.
By any means necessary. We got to take them out.
That's how the devil operates. By any means
(14:18):
necessary. And boy, he was on my back and I'd
be in and out of sin, like I said, with the Lord
today. You know what the
good thing about all this
is? He never gave up on me. When I gave up on
myself, he was there for me. He walked in the
forest with me. I look back on my life today and
(14:41):
I can see him there. I can see him there. He has
made himself so real. You know, I can't even, the
Mennonites played a big role in my
transition. They didn't know it but they did. God
used them. And I made a, I fell at this church
(15:03):
I'm a member of now. And God told me to confess my
sins to the congregation. I did that in front of
all those people, the only black guy there. And
I'm telling all these white people that I sinned,
(15:24):
that I asked for their forgiveness and I ask God
for his forgiveness. And from that moment on,
I never did drugs again. Now, because it's
something about confessing your sins
is that helps the healing process, the addiction
process. When you acknowledge, the Bible says,
(15:47):
James said, acknowledge your sins because if you
want to be healed, so I'm crazy. I believed it.
So I did it. And here I am today. And you still
have tests. Things like sorry, that,
oh, I just came to a test, wanting to go back
(16:09):
after 15 years. And I kept like David,
encouraging myself in the Lord, Scriptures, I
quote Scriptures to myself and all this.
And I made it through. And then you call. I see
that as a reward for God's goodness for me,
(16:32):
fighting the fight and not give up. I was going
to ask more about confession.
So you felt like you should confess to your
brothers and sisters in the church. And you
see that as a, as a piece of staying free and
moving beyond falling. What connection do you see
(16:54):
between confession and the victory you're
experiencing? Why connection? Yes. God is
the connection because he's the one who said,
confess your sins to one another, that you may be
healed. And being one that's starting to trust
in the Lord and
(17:15):
count on him to depend on him.
We have a part to play in this, believe it or
not. That's God's part. That's Jesus' part.
That's the Holy Spirit's part. And then there's
our part. If we don't do our part,
change will not come. We have to do our part.
(17:37):
He's, for example, he says,
control the deeds of your flesh. Stay away from
the appearance of sin. Do this. Don't do it.
There's a lot you have to do and don't do in the
Bible. And there's work. The good,
Titus says he saved us unto good works.
(17:59):
Works don't save us, but works come after we're saved.
And yeah, God is the reason. And he's the
connection between me and my freedom from sin.
It's all him. He brought the Mennonites in my life
(18:23):
because, first of all, I want to say he
had a respect for the Mennonites because they're
not perfect, but they're a lot closer to him,
I think, than most denominations. You know what
I'm saying? That making sense?
And I know the way because I read His word. I
(18:48):
mean, they do the best they can to serve God,
and I respect that. And I believe, God respects
that too. Because there
are some groups of Mennonites
that are just flippin' out. Going to the world, I
know that too. Well so far
the ones God had brought me in touch with, they
are sold out for Jesus. And those are the people
(19:12):
I want to hang around with. That encouraged me to
get up and dust myself over and keep stepping.
So I'm trying to piece together pieces of your
story. I think you alluded to already. But before
you found the Mennonite Church, did I hear
correctly that you were with several other
(19:32):
churches or with other Christians, other churches
prior to that? Can you
talk about that experience?
I was a member of the... Okay, I was homeless. I
had drunk... What's the word? I got so addicted
I ended up homeless. And then I was
(19:55):
standing at the shelter, and
churches used to drive around on weekends to see
if anyone wanted to go to church.
They from all different churches, all different
denominations. And there was one,
the guy was driving around once, and something about
this, I said, "Well, the
(20:16):
Baptist, like the Mennonite,
they love to eat." And so they told us they had
food and things like that,
and we wanted to go to church.
And my plan, believe it or not, was to go and see
what they had to eat. I wasn't interested in
those services. I wanted to see what they had to
eat. And would you believe from that moment,
(20:39):
going to see what they had to eat, I stayed a
member of that church five years?
Because I tell you what, they had... In all their craziness, and
they had something I recognized. I don't know how
I recognized it. I ended up becoming an associate
(21:02):
pastor to the pastor there. And to this day,
I went to his funeral, his wife's blessing us
with financial support. That's how we feed the
homeless to this day. It's been 20 years since I
met them. And who knew? 20
(21:25):
years later, we would be...
Let me tell you this. The Baptists, to me, I know
they have their faults, every denomination does,
and they have their belief that every
denomination had believed
something different. I know this.
But I have a respect for
(21:46):
them and some of their beliefs.
You know, there are some I don't agree with.
That's true. But that church,
the Believer's Baptist Church,
was such a blessing to me. Five years, I stayed
sober because the love
(22:09):
they showed me at that church.
I wanted to be a Christian. I desired to be a
Christian. But as soon as the pastor moved
to Louisiana- his grandson was diagnosed with
leukemia. And they were up in the [indistinct]. They
didn't want to keep driving back and forth. So
they just moved back to Lousiana. As soon as
(22:30):
they did, I failed because I didn't have that
accountability. I can't even say that.
The accountability anymore. You know what I mean?
And that's what the Mennonites
give me a lot of is accountability. They hold me
accountable. Since I've been hanging out with
(22:50):
them, I've been on the prison ministry. Can you
imagine me going to prison? I spent my whole
life trying not to go to prison. And here I am,
God sent me to a prison. It's amazing.
I think that the theme that you mentioned with
both your time with the Mennonite Church and the
Baptist Church is accountability and brothers and
(23:12):
sisters around you to support you, to walk
with you as you pursued Jesus. Yeah, they didn't
condemn me. Galatians, I believe the sixth one
said, "Carry one another's burdens." You know
that? Oh, yes. We're to
(23:34):
carry each other's burdens.
We're supposed to help each other. When one of
the brothers, we see him fall, we're not going to
condemn him, judge him. We're supposed to pick
him up and help him get back on his feet.
That's what Jesus told us to do. Paul preached
it, but his gospel is God accepts the gospel
(24:00):
he preaches. He said, "Anybody preach any other
gospel than what I preach,
you let them be accursed."
So that gives to me, that gives Paul's gospel a
lot of credibility. It says it's approved by God.
You know, he said God is not
(24:21):
going to send no angel from heaven
or anybody else to preach a
different gospel than what I have preached.
Right? That gives his gospel a lot of
credibility. So when Paul
said, it's as good as God saying it.
Paul is a great man. I'm sure he
(24:44):
had his mistakes and doubts at times.
We all do, but we just got to keep, I learned
that we got to continue to press toward the mark.
If we fall, get up, dust yourself off. Say to satan
"You're a liar." We keep
on heading toward the mark,
which is Jesus Christ. The Bible says that. You
(25:06):
know, this is what you do if you fall.
This is what you do if you, John said, "Confess
your sins." He said, "Anybody that says they
don't live in sin, that don't sin is a liar, and
the truth is not in them." Right?
Right, yes.
Okay. So confess them. And a lot of Christians
(25:29):
don't want to confess them because
the church doesn't handle that well, and you got
to go in some way else. We don't want that in our
church. That's not what Christ said. Christ said,
"Carry one another's burdens."
I wanted to ask you, how did that look in
practical terms? So with
(25:49):
the churches you've been at,
you've mentioned the brothers and sisters who
have helped to carry your burdens to provide
accountability. Practically speaking, how did
that, how did they provide
that for you in helping to
carry your burdens?
Prayer. They prayed for me. Even when I wasn't
around. And Christ said this, Paul said this,
(26:13):
and this will explain. "If the same spirit dwells
in you that raised Christ from the dead,"
to me, the gospel is talking about how Christ
would discern the hearts of the Pharisees before
(26:34):
they even got close to him. If that same spirit
is in us, we should pick up on when the brother
is struggling. There should be signs and flags to
us as Christians who have filled with the Holy
(26:55):
Spirit to sense, if you will, that one of our
brothers is something going on with him,
something's not right with him. And they would do
that. The Mennonites do that. Not all
Baptist churches, but that one I went to, they
(27:15):
sense things were going on
with me that wasn't right.
And they would address those issues. They weren't
out to make everybody happy.
They believed what the Bible said too. Psalm said
that if man would, in other words,
(27:39):
if man would testify the goodness of God. God has
been so good to me, I'm running out of,
I lost count of how good he's been to me. I mean,
he said, "I'll open the windows and pour
out grace that you cannot contain." I'm having to
give them away 'cause it's so many
But you know what?
He's not doing it because he want to do it. He's
(28:01):
doing it to reward us for our obedience.
Like talking to you. I never dreamed of this.
That's nothing but God. That's nothing but God.
God is amazing. And he wants to make his, Jesus
(28:22):
said in John chapter one, that I have declared
unto you the Lord. That's why I came here. I've
declared who God is. God
is holy. God is righteous.
God is without sin. That's who he wants us to be.
Like God, our father. Be holy as he is holy.
(28:43):
And you know, that's what I'm practicing to do.
I'm not practicing in drug.
Sin is hard. It's hard. I don't understand why I
didn't[?] end up in prison for a robbery to keep my
drug habit. And you know what I'm saying? A lot
(29:05):
of people ended up in jail because of drugs.
They want to supply their addiction and they'll
do whatever they have to do to do that.
I don't know why I didn't do all that. I could
just say God was with me
even when I was a sinner.
And he was with Jonah when he sinned and decided
(29:28):
that and was disobedient and didn't want to go to
Nineveh and preach the gospel. So he ran away
from God. How many times
have I ran away from God?
I lost count. But you know what? God gives us all
an opportunity to repent. And that's what he did
for me. I don't know if he'll give you 50 years
(29:50):
to repent if you were sinning, but he did me.
Because this journey has been a long one. It's
been a hard one. And God never left my side.
He never left my side. So accountability is
key. Not just talking to people that are lost,
(30:13):
but the Christians as well. We got to keep them
in check. We got to keep ourselves in check.
Paul said examine yourself to make sure you're
in the faith. You know what I mean?
That what he said. We got to keep
an eye on each other. We're family.
(30:33):
We may be all different colors, but we're family.
Amen. If you belong to Jesus. Amen.
It sounds like your path has been a bit winding
and long. You talked about how early in life God
was beginning to pursue you. And he still is. And
you've been free now for quite a while.
(30:54):
But if I understand correctly, your story also
includes times of relapsing back into sin and
getting stuck again. What have you found to be
most important in staying free and getting free
again after you've fallen? Jesus can answer that
best. He said, any man who's not willing to give
(31:19):
up his family for him, his friends that he used
to hang out with, you got to stop. You got, Paul
said it this way, put off the old man and put on the
new man, which is created after God in holiness and righteousness.
(31:41):
You got to stop hanging out with people you used
to hang out with. You can't be a Christian
and a follower of Jesus and keep the friends you
had back in the day. You got to let them go.
They have no good intentions for your Christian
walk. They want to get you back into drugs.
(32:02):
I was one of those people that bought drugs a lot
for people. I was the reason for the party,
if you will. And I would say, you got to give up
some things to stay free. You know what I mean?
You got to let them go. Even if you're alone, I
find myself not lonely, but alone a lot. All I do
(32:27):
is go to work and go to church and maybe go out to
Denver here and there.
But I don't surround myself,
even with family that doesn't want to live for
Jesus. Yeah, I mean, that's the price you pay.
It's not free. You got to give up. You may have
to walk away from your
daughter or your son or your
(32:48):
mother or your father or your cousin or your
girlfriend. Because now you're with Jesus,
he says sex outside of marriage is a sin.
Right? So you got to give up that girlfriend.
And that takes a lot to do. You know what I'm
(33:10):
saying? Y'all might have a baby. Take care of
the baby, but you can no longer sleep together.
So you got to be willing to pay- Paul says
count the cost. That means there's a price to pay
to follow Jesus. You know, I said I did that the
other day last week. I counted the cost of
(33:35):
whatever it cost me to go back into sin. And I
thought to myself, the price is too high. I'm not
willing to pay to give up Jesus for a five minute
fling and perverted sex. I just wasn't willing to do
that. You know, and the price is too high.
(33:55):
Sin costs too much and will keep you longer than
you want it to be there. Got to read Proverbs
seven. So we got, we got to count the costs,
examine ourselves to make sure we're in the faith.
Jesus said, who he set free is free indeed.
(34:16):
But the way you stay free is you got to do what
the scripture says. You know, you can't just go
around talking like "I'm a Christian" and living like
crazy out there. You can't do that. That's not-
Jesus is holy righteous and without sin.
And to be a part of that family, we have to be
(34:36):
the same way. That's what the scripture says.
And to stay away from sin, you got to avoid even
the appearance of it. For example, you say,
I'm going to get some chips, but you stop at
the liquor store. Your intention is going in there
and get some chips because that's the closest store.
(34:57):
But what if a church member drove by
and saw you going in there? They don't see you
bringing chips out. They just see a brown bag
and then a rumor start. You see what I'm saying?
Yeah. Avoid the appearance. Even though you
just want some chips, what if a church member
(35:19):
drove by. "Oh, I saw
Jaran going down to the liquor store."
Then the rumor start because of the appearance.
You know what I'm saying? Yeah. So accountability
again is key. It's very important and hold
yourself accountable. So yeah.
(35:45):
I think those were wise words. One thing I hear
you emphasizing is the importance
of accountability. You also spoke about, you
know, sometimes people around us can be a bad
influence. And I'm, I'm hearing a contrast here.
On one hand, you have God's people,
you have the community of Christians who are
(36:07):
helping support you and bearing your burdens
and holding you accountable. And on the other
hand, you can have people around you who want
to pull you down and drag you back into sin. And
so for wanting to stay
free and to live for Jesus,
part of counting the cost is understanding that
there might be implications that we don't like
(36:30):
in having to distance ourselves from people who
are continually or just making it their
business to drag you back into sin. And giving up
those relationships might be a painful thing.
That's what Jesus meant when he said, if you're
not willing to give up your family,
(36:55):
there are brothers and sisters that I stopped
socializing with because they weren't
going where I wanted to go. So therefore they
weren't helping me to get where I need to get.
I wanted to get in heaven with Jesus. And that's
why he, that's why I
don't believe in once saved
(37:15):
always saved, because every scripture I read and
there are hundreds of
them talks about continuing,
talks about enduring, talking about continuing
the work, continue to do
this, continue to do that.
Christ has a, how can I say, God has a, it's like
(37:39):
I told my sister this morning,
some people want to move in your house and tell
you how to run it. That's what some Christians
are. They wanted God, but they don't want a house
full of rules. But God has rules.
(38:00):
Just read the book. And here in order to get to
heaven, we have to follow the rules.
You know what I'm saying? I
know I sound sometimes radical,
but you have to be that way. If you want to get
to heaven, this is a fight.
(38:23):
You know, and a lot of Christians, I'm talking
about me, but I used to fall for this too.
A lot of Christians say the battle is the Lord's.
The scripture says that.
But then when you continue to study, why does the
scripture say put on the whole armor of God?
(38:44):
You don't put on armor unless you going to war.
Right? So what does that mean?
That we just let the Lord handle it? Our part of
the war is to abstain from all forms of evil,
of sin. Our point of battle could be letting go
(39:06):
of family. You have to fight.
You know, I know I love my brothers and sisters,
but I'm not going to go to a nightclub with them.
I'm not going to go do drugs with them. You know what I'm
saying? You have to count the cost.
I'm glad you're talking about this as a battle. I
(39:27):
think that many in our audience,
many of the people who will be listening to this,
will really connect with that because,
you know, many are fighting a battle and
sometimes there's victory
and sometimes there's losses.
I'm curious, what would you say to the ones who
(39:47):
are listening, who find
themselves fighting a battle,
but experiencing more losses than wins? And it's
like they want to do what's right. They know
what's right. They want to live for God, but it
just feels like they can't win and be victorious
and be free of sin. What would you say to those
(40:08):
who are experiencing life that way?
I would say what Jesus said. You can overcome
because I have overcame. First of all,
I would tell them to really
trust in Jesus. The second thing is,
(40:29):
and this is a problem for a lot of Christians,
they say, "I can do this. God is all I need." No, he's not.
God works through people. He's always done that.
And there are other Christians that God will work
through to help you be victorious. Again, that
(40:53):
brings sin to accountability. You have to begin by
examining yourself and the church is both be
understanding like Jesus and help you get back
on the right track. Just think if Jesus gave up
(41:14):
on me at the 400th time... I know he has a line
that you don't want to cross, but he's the one
that says, "Forgive, seventy times seven."
Just think if he'd have gave up on us. We need
(41:34):
each other. Jesus is not all you need.
You need each other because he's working through
other Christians. You know what I'm saying?
So we had to hold ourselves accountable first.
And we need to stop thinking that nobody cares.
(41:56):
They don't care. They just want you to come to church
and pay tithe. Some people in that church do care
because you can't be a Christian and not care.
When Jesus' heart was all about care,
we need to carry one another's burden again. I
(42:16):
said it twice already. And the blame doesn't
fall all on the church. The blame falls on us
because we need to confess our sins to other
people. And we're only going to be healed when we
do that, Paul said. And it starts with holding
(42:40):
yourself accountable. I felt... I heard all the
lies the devil told me
that they're going to laugh
at you. They're going to tell you, "Stop going to
the church." But here's
where the healing came in.
I was determined to do what the Bible said do,
"to confess my sins to one another."
(43:06):
And that's when the healing came. If you listen
to the devil and say, "Oh,
they're going to laugh at
me. They're going to call me an [indistinct] person.
They're going to do
this." Just do what Jesus said.
And I guarantee you, you'll have a healing. It
won't happen overnight. Some people it does.
(43:29):
But know this, if you do your part, God will do
his part. And that's
important. That is one of the
first things I learned when I started studying
the Bible is I have a part to play in this.
And I have to do my part or else- my part is confess
(43:53):
sins. If I don't do that, the healing won't come.
The Bible is very simple to me. But it took years
of falling and stumbling and
not giving up and continuing to press for the
mark. We can't quit. We
(44:13):
have to continue. Jesus said,
"If you continue, if you continue in my word,"
don't quit. Don't quit. Continue. Even if you do
screw up and sin, go to your church or go to a
Christian and confess your sins "and you too
(44:37):
shall be healed." God still works miracles today.
He still heals. He still turns water into wine.
But not in the sense that we think. But God works
like he works. And we can't tell God to hurry up
or [indistinct] God works in his own time.
(45:01):
But he has a time that Jesus is coming back
and if we're not ready, there will be no more
time to get ready. So we
need each other to help us
fight the good fight of faith. Right? We need
each other. And we as Christians have to be
(45:22):
compassionate and understanding with everybody
because how can I tell drug addicts that you're
going to go to hell? God doesn't want to do it.
When he dealt 15 years with me, in my sins,
he has a time, a season if you will, for everyone
(45:44):
to finally say, "Lord, I need you." That was a
season for the thief on the cross, even though he
wasn't baptized, even though he didn't do any good works
But God counted whatever he said as
righteousness and accept the thief on the cross.
(46:07):
We have to do our part in order to have victory.
Our part. Yeah. And your life is a testimony to
doing your part and persevering, but also
testimony to God's power and God working miracles
and God still doing that. Yes. Yes, he is. I love
(46:28):
that you keep calling us to remember God's power
and his willingness and eagerness to work
miracles in our lives. So we
mentioned the people who will
resonate with what you're saying because they
themselves are experiencing addiction and bondage
and sin. But I think that there's also people who
are listening who aren't really experiencing it
(46:49):
in that way for themselves, but they have loved
ones or friends who are just really stuck
in sin and wanting to be free. Do you have advice
for those people who want to help those around
them find freedom? Tell them to watch the podcast
and listen to my story. Listen to how I
(47:13):
fell and struggled. And if those people are
Christians, you can't make nobody stop doing
drugs. You can't make nobody say, I'm going to be
a Christian, but you can give good advice.
Whether they take it or not is on them. Their part
(47:33):
is to take it or reject it.
Do you have a choice? We all have a choice. And
our choices are Jesus or
Satan. There's nothing in
between that. And we need to tell people. That's
why I want to go to the streets, if you will,
(47:57):
because I lived there. I lived down there with
those homeless peoples back in
2000, 1999 when I became homeless. And I lived
down there and I bought the drugs down there.
But all the time I was down there, I would go in
my, where they had me to
sleep and read the Bible.
(48:17):
I'd be drunk out of my mind reading the Bible.
Think about that man on the island that was
cutting himself, running around naked. But when
he came at the feet of Jesus,
Jesus changed his life.
If you want it, you are the only one that can
(48:41):
stop you from getting it or getting it.
You got to be tired of being tired. They say that
at Alcoholics Anonymous.
You just got to be tired of being tired.
You got to be tired of living like
that. You don't have to live in addiction. You
don't have to live in drugs. And yes, it's going
(49:01):
to be hard when you first start out.
But focus on the end of the race.
It doesn't matter what position you
come in with, your first,
second, third, or last. What matters is that you come in.
And we need to have people,
(49:23):
to help those people that want that to come in.
But we can't help them if they don't want to make
the decision to do it differently. You know what
I'm saying? We can tell them what- I can't tell
nobody to go to therapy. I can't tell nobody to
go to rehab. I can't tell
(49:44):
nobody to go to counseling
because I never did all that. I went to Jesus.
And it didn't happen overnight. It took 50 some
years for me to finally get to this point. We
need to take the time,
the season, today, today for
salvation. Who knows if God won't be back before
(50:05):
the next 50 years. I'm just thankful that I came
to my senses and I can pause there. You could be
sure they're just saved. And I'm sure I'm saved.
Again, it's up to them. You can give them advice
(50:27):
and tell them the cause. But still,
the bottom line is they have to make the decision
to not want to live like that anymore. You know
what I'm saying? But some people so in bondage. I
can't tell you, brother, how many days I spent
in motels shooting up. I used to mix crack and
(50:48):
heroin together. It's crazy.
Well, it's crazy that bad man sitting on the island cutting himself,
running around naked, screaming and hollering at
people, acting like a madman.
I was just as crazy as he was. But look at me now.
(51:11):
And when I look at me, I see Jesus all over
there. I was totally strung out, brother.
I was gone. I was homeless in LA.
I was homeless in Kansas. I got tired of
that life. So I did come
(51:32):
to the decision I'm just going to die a drug
addict and a homosexual.
Jesus could change all that.
But you got to do your part. We got to do our
part. We got to come to
him, ask him for forgiveness.
And then he'll start putting
(51:52):
people in our lives that can help us.
We need more than Jesus. We need each other.
Addiction is nothing to play with.
Yeah. It'll cost you everything.
Everything. Living a homosexual life. One thing I
(52:12):
knew was if I had drugs, I could have anybody.
I've seen men leave their families to spend the
night with me because I had the drugs.
Again, don't look bad at me. I went to Jesus.
(52:35):
And I repented of all those sins.
And here I am talking to you about
Jesus because I know what he can do.
I don't care how messed up you think you are.
There's nothing impossible for him to do.
Because I know I was tore up on the floor, as
they say. But I'm in my right mind today,
(52:57):
serving a risen Savior, trying to tell people
about Jesus. Like I started saying earlier,
but I lost track. That's why I like going down to
the streets. Because I remember the time I
lived down there. And I want to tell them
there's a way out. But I
(53:17):
can't make them come out.
I can show them the way. But ultimately, it's
their decision. You know what I'm saying?
Yeah. It'll be that decision.
These are very wise words Dwight. And I think
these are good words to end on.
As I listen to you talk, I think about the verse
(53:38):
in Revelation that we've
mentioned on this podcast
before. It says, "They overcame him by the blood
of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony."
"Word of their testimony."
We've seen the blood of the Lamb's power in your
life. And I think there's also overcoming power
in the word of your testimony. You have overcome.
Jesus has helped you to overcome and helps you
(54:00):
to continue to overcome as you share the word of
your testimony. So thank you so much for coming
on the podcast and sharing your testimony with us
today. Oh, brother. I owe it all to him.
I wouldn't have no testimony if it had not been
for him. And Jimmy Swaggart has a song he sings.
(54:26):
And the name of it is, "I want to just thank you,
Lord, for saving me from what I might have been."
It's scary to think of what I might have been,
had I not come to Jesus. It's just scary.
Yeah. And so trust Jesus, everybody. Turn to
(54:49):
Jesus. Train your eyes upon the Lord
and the things of the
world will grow strangely dim.
Amen. Yes, they will. And I hope we can get
together again, my brother.
I hope so too. And I hope to
meet you in person someday.
It's been, a delight to talk with you here on this
call. Thank you so much for joining us.
You're welcome. To God be the glory. You can have
(55:13):
what I have, but you got to pay the cost,
pay the price. He can set you free. Yes. And it
is worth the cost. God bless you and
where you are, brother. And thank you for
inviting me here. It's been a pleasure.
Thank you for listening to this episode with
Dwight Peavy.
(55:34):
In April of 2025, we recorded an episode with Michael Hochstetler
called, "What is addiction? How can we help each
other?" For practical tips on helping those
around you who are facing
addiction, feel free to check
out that episode. You can also find all of our
other episodes and essays at
(55:54):
anabaptistperspectives.org.
Thank you for listening to this episode of
Anabaptist Perspectives.
We will see you next week in another episode.
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