Emotional Regulation in Girls with Autism

Did you know that autistic girls often struggle with emotional regulation in ways that are different from boys — yet these challenges are frequently overlooked or misunderstood? In this episode of The Aspie World Podcast, I dive into why emotional regulation can be harder for autistic females, what’s really happening beneath the surface, and how to support autistic girls in managing big emotions.

Many autistic women and girls experience intense emotions, but because they often mask their struggles, their needs go unnoticed. Understanding how autism affects emotional regulation is the first step in helping autistic girls thrive without shame, burnout, or overwhelm.

• Why emotional regulation challenges are common in autistic girls

• How masking and social expectations make things harder

• Signs your autistic daughter or student may be struggling internally

• Simple, practical strategies to support emotional regulation

• How autistic girls can build coping tools that actually work for them

The goal isn’t to “fix” autistic girls — it’s to understand their needs and give them the tools and support they need to feel safe, seen, and understood.

• Parents of autistic girls seeking better support strategies

• Autistic teens and young adults struggling with emotional overwhelm

• Teachers, carers, and therapists supporting autistic females

• Anyone wanting to understand the unique emotional needs of autistic women and girls

If you’ve ever felt confused by emotional outbursts, meltdowns, or sudden shutdowns, this episode will give you insight, compassion, and practical solutions.

🎁 FREE Download: Get your Autistic Adult Bulletproof Brain Starter Kit and discover science-backed strategies to manage emotions, reduce overwhelm, and build unstoppable confidence → www.bulletproofbrain.org

If you found this episode helpful, please:
✅ Subscribe to The Aspie World Podcast so you never miss an episode
✅ Leave a review — your feedback helps more autistic people and families find this content
✅ Share this episode with friends, parents, teachers, or anyone supporting autistic girls

When we understand autistic emotions, we can create safer, more supportive environments where girls can thrive authentically. 💜

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:Who This Episode Is For:Resources & Support for Autistic AdultsLet’s Stay Connected

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
So why is emotional regulation important for females on the
autism spectrum? I'm going to get into all of
this right now because it's super important.
Guys, welcome back to the Aspy world.
What on earth is Diggly Diggly going on?
I am done and I have autism and ADHD and I make weekly videos
all about helping people, helping you achieve goals on the
autism spectrum. Because I believe that we can
create a better amazing world ifwe all team together and create

(00:22):
a movement that's just going to just blow the lid and get
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(00:44):
it just it's pretty awesome and and my DMS are always open.
So just hit me up guys. You know, emotional regulation
is difficult for autistic individuals.
Now, girls on the autism inspection will have issues with
emotional regulation, down to the simple fact that females in
the autism spectrum have a stronger connection to emotions.
But there's still the issues with emotional regulation.

(01:05):
Now, emotional regulation is regulating how you feel about
emotions, how you feel with youremotions.
Are you able to express emotions?
Are you able to talk about your emotions?
Are you able to tell someone howyou really feel about your
emotions? Now, emotions come from the word
energy in motion. Now, what this means is that
you'll have a buildup of energy that you want to express in a
certain way. And emotion is how you express

(01:25):
it, right? So you feel a certain way, you
want to express it, you feel really, really happy.
You'll smile and laugh and joke around.
It would be great. But autistic individuals,
because autism is inherently a communication disorder, the
communication between yourself to know this is an emotion and I
want to put that into motion or it isn't energy and I want to
put it into motion. It's not there.
It's disconnected. There's a, there's a, there's a
disconnect. So instead we have emotional

(01:48):
dysregulation or no emotional regulation at all, where you
could be seen to be having a really stressful time in an
event, which is really, really happy because you can't say, oh,
you know, I'm actually really hot sat next to the window in
the sun, can I move? You can't figure that out
because your emotions are overtaking and you don't know
which emotion you're going to put into motion, into an energy

(02:09):
that is the way that you want itto be heard.
So the importance of actually having emotional regulation is
tenfold. You know, I mean, they have so
many, so many areas. So let's go back a bit.
How can we get this? How can we get it to a place
where we understand if we think about energy in motion, again,
it's really interesting if we break it down to two parts, you
have energy, you have emotion. We all know how to motion.
If I said to you, hey, you know,flap your hands, you just flap

(02:32):
your hands, right? That's motion.
If I said to you think about an energy, you'd be like, OK, I
want to think about energy of feeling sad or think about
energy of feeling happy, or think about energy of feeling
hungry or the energy of feeling thirsty.
You know all of those energies, right?
So all we do is this. You need to analyze your
position, your situation when you're in it, say, OK, I am

(02:53):
feeling annoyed, annoying is thefeeling, but how do I want to
put that into motion? Stand up and talk verbally, so
on. I am feeling very stressed, very
anxious at the moment. I want to do something
different. I'm uncomfortable.
I need to move. Remember, choosing the energy or
identifying the energy and then choosing the motion in which you

(03:14):
relay that energy to somebody else or to the world is how you
regulate emotions. Practice always makes progress.
So this is what I this is what Itend to do.
I tend to just tell randomly like my partner and my friends,
I'll be like, huh, I'm feeling hungry right now.
Because the more I practice understanding my own emotion,
the better and more regular those emotions are going to be
understood. So I can regulate my emotions

(03:35):
more easy by practicing. Practice makes progress.
Guys. If you want to download my free
life hacks PDF book on autism and you can do from
autismhacks.net right now. I love you guys, peace.