March 11, 2025 • 30 mins
Restoring the Heart, Mind, Body, and Soul
Join James, director of projects and spiritual coach at Regeneration, in this episode of the Remember series. We discuss how Jesus knows and remembers who we were created to be and explore the transformation of our hearts, minds, bodies, and souls. As we reflect on Dallas Willard's insights from Renovation of the Heart, we discuss actionable steps to heal from sexual struggles, betrayal, and more. This episode offers hope, healing, and a renewed understanding of God's love and plan for our wholeness.
00:00 Introduction: God's Memory and Our Wholeness
01:07 The Concept of Restoration
03:01 Understanding the Human Person
04:13 The Heart: Core of Our Being
09:02 The Mind: Thoughts and Feelings
17:05 The Body: Physical Restoration
21:43 The Social Dimension: Healing Through Relationships
25:00 The Soul: Integration of All Parts
27:25 Conclusion and Prayer
Free Resources to help you on your journey to Becoming Whole
👉Men's Overcoming Lust & Temptation Devotional
👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
James Craig (00:00):
God remembers who he created you to be.
Luke 19, 9 through 10 saysJesus said to him.
Today, salvation has come tothis house because this man too
is a son of Abraham, for the Sonof man came to seek and save
(00:22):
the lost.
Today we're continuing ourRemember series on Becoming
Whole.
I'm James, director of projectsas well as spiritual coach and
a group leader here at Regen.
You know an object can only besought and saved if the creator
or owner of that objectremembers what that object
(00:43):
originally was.
Sadly, my wife and I movedrecently and we lost my original
wedding ring.
I often am wearing one of thesesilicone rings, so I can not
scuff up the metal ring, but Ican only seek that ring because
I know what it was.
I can only save that ringbecause I had a vision.
I can see in my mind's eye whatit originally looked like.
(01:06):
So today, for episode four ofthis Remember series on becoming
whole, we're going to talkabout how Jesus remembers us.
We've said that every singleepisode.
God remembers you, butspecifically how he knows what
we were made to be, what we weremade to be, the person the
(01:29):
glorified the original intent ofwhat he made us to be and in
between, you know what we arenow, and that kind of glorified
vision of who we really are, howhe puts together every part of
us.
We've been doing this play onwords.
(01:49):
Remember to remember to putmembers back together, to
reintegrate.
We often say it on this channelwe want to have sexual integrity
, we want to be integratedsexually, we want to become
whole.
We want the parts of us to comeback into alignment to the
whole, being led by the Spirit.
So let me ask you all do youwant to stop sinning sexually?
(02:13):
Many of you who listen to thisare here for that exact reason.
Do you want to heal frombetrayal?
How about do you want to helpyour kid through their own
sexual struggles?
How about do you want to helpyour kid through their own
sexual struggles?
The A to Z of healing is whatPsalm 23 calls the restoring of
our souls.
Psalm 23, I believe it's versethree.
(02:35):
It says you restore my soul.
Now some of the newertranslations use refresh and I
think that there's a power tothat image as well of God
refreshing our souls.
But I like the old translationthat Dallas Willard, who I'm
going to be referencing a lottoday, originally put me onto
(02:55):
that God actually is in thebusiness of restoring our souls.
So I'm going to referenceactually specifically one
particular page from Willard'sbook, incredible book,
life-changing book for me,called the Renovation of the
Heart.
I recently came out with ananniversary edition but if
you're watching on video hereyou'll see I've got one of the
(03:17):
original heart covers.
I believe I inherited this frommy parents' library and this
book was so life-changing,especially some of the pages on
what love is and what it isn't,love and lust.
He actually goes into that alittle bit.
But on page 38 of Renovation ofthe Heart you're going to have
to picture this along with me.
I'm going to do my best topaint this picture but since I
don't have express permission touse this image, you might have
(03:40):
to look it up yourself.
You could look up Dallas Willardum, renovation of the heart,
human person image or somethinglike that.
But imagine five concentriccircle, so like like a target,
like uh, something with abullseye.
So the center circle would bethe bullseye and then that
center circle is surrounded byanother circle and that circle
(04:00):
another, all the way out to fivedifferent circles, the core
circle.
I'm going to just give you aquick flyover of each circle and
then we're going to get intohow God wants to restore all
that we are.
First circle, the inner circle,the bullseye, the heart, is the
heart.
He also calls it the spirit orthe will.
(04:22):
He believes that and I see thisin scripture as well that when
the Bible is using the wordheart, it's not primarily
talking about emotions that'smore of our modern English way
of using the word heart.
Instead, it's talking about thecore of who we are, the center,
the command center, if you will.
That's why the word will is inthere as well.
So the spirit, the heart, thewill is at the core of who we
(04:43):
are.
Next layer out in this pictureof the human person, this target
is the mind.
For Dallas, that includedthoughts and feelings.
I think that's a helpful way tothink about the mind, thoughts
and feelings.
Following circle is the body.
And notice again, because theseare concentric circles, the
body kind of in some sensecontains the mind and contains
(05:06):
the spirit, not in a full sense.
We know that even when ourbodies die, we will still have
our spirits and our minds, butthe ultimate picture that God
gives us of fully restoredhumanity is a new body as well.
So we have our body as the nextcircle, circle number three.
Circle number four is thesocial circle.
(05:27):
This is our relationships.
This is us connecting from bodyto body, from person to person,
and finally, the outer circleis the soul.
What's interesting here is,typically, when we hear the word
soul, we grab on to a Greekunderstanding or perhaps a
Platonic understanding of thesoul as the non-material thing.
(05:49):
So we've got bodies, we've gotsouls.
The soul is like the part thatgoes to heaven when we die For
Dallas and, I believe, for thescriptures, especially in the
Hebrew scriptures.
We can see that the soul iskind of this integrating force
in our whole life.
It integrates the social, thebody, the mind, the spirit, and
that's why it's the outer circle.
(06:10):
So the soul integrates thewhole person.
It could also be used the wordlife could be used here, and
actually the word that's oftentranslated, soul, actually can
be used, for it's used inscripture, I believe for animals
.
They don't have the same kindof soul we have because we have
this mind and this spirit orheart or will.
That makes us different, butthere's something about this
(06:34):
overall idea of an integratinglife.
Okay, so let's get into it.
Let's get into how God seeks torenovate us from the inside out
, going back to the core, thespirit, the heart, the will.
This is the part of us thatdied.
When Adam and Eve first atefrom the fruit from the tree of
the knowledge of good and evil,it says surely, on the day you
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eat from that tree.
In scripture it says you willdie.
Now they lived according toscripture, you know hundreds
more years, but they died thatday spiritually.
There was a spiritual death atthe core of who they were and
ultimately, yeah, that rippledout and their bodies died and,
and you know, their whole personeventually died.
(07:16):
But the first core part ofrenovation of the heart is
seeing our heart married, seeingour spirit brought to life by
the holy spirit.
The holy spirit marries ourspirit and brings us to a new
life in christ and part of whathe wants to do.
(07:40):
In that initial moment of faithwe have his spirit come into
the core of who we are.
But the problem is we're notpurely spiritual beings, as I've
already said today.
We're what Christopher Westjokingly calls angel moles.
Right, we're spiritual andphysical, we're body and mind.
We're these dual naturecreatures.
(08:02):
So the problem with having arevived spirit is that it's
still on this earth before we.
We are in the new heavens, anew earth.
Having our spirits reviveddoesn't immediately change our
entire soul.
It changes our spirit.
And so now we've got this flameinside of us, we've got got the
Holy Spirit inside of us, webecome the temple of the Holy
(08:26):
Spirit.
And so now our wills can beengaged toward the good, toward
God, toward things of his designand his desires for us, that we
could only ultimately desire orseek that which isn't of God,
(08:47):
or we couldn't seek God in asuper direct way.
In other words, we couldn'tagape love God before he came
into our hearts and revived us.
But now we need this to workits way out.
We need this to change ourentire soul.
So this is where the mind comesin next.
Now, granted, the mind isactually where we first heard
(09:07):
the gospel.
It says, in this image that I'mreferencing from Renovation of
the Heart, that the word and thespirit of Christ, first the
word of Christ, enters our minds.
We hear the gospel over timewhen that goes from the mind,
just knowing the gospel, knowingthat God loves us and that he
came to save us and have usenter into fellowship with him.
(09:28):
When that goes into spirit.
That's when we're regenerated.
But it does start with the mind.
It comes into the mind first.
You could even say it couldstart with the body.
It comes into your ears first.
It starts with the social.
It comes from another person,so you can see how these circles
again build on each other.
It comes from another person,so you can see how these circles
again build on each other.
But in the mind we havethoughts and feelings.
(09:48):
Thoughts can be restored orrenovated primarily through
engaging with what is true.
Engaging with what is true, ifyou want to think of it, on a
brain level, which I know I'mskipping ahead a little bit to
the body circle when I talkabout the brain.
But on a brain level, this isoften our left brain knowledge.
We can't make this everything,but we can't say this is
(10:11):
unimportant either.
Here's what I mean Learningthat pornography is a sin,
learning that you've experiencedbetrayal, learning even that
your child is giving in tosexual compulsion or has sexual
brokenness, and even learningways to overcome.
That aren't enough on their own, but they are an important
starting point.
(10:31):
We really do benefit from thetruth that sets us free.
I've often said it in my ownjourney, when I first engaged in
Awaken, one of our year-roundgroup for men, awaken 360, I
came across so much that wastrue that I had never known so
much theological truth.
And it wasn't that I was kindof being beaten over the head
(10:53):
with it or whatever, but it waslike it felt like I was
experiencing it, like Jesus said, like the truth that sets us
free.
We need to know what is true.
We need to know that change indesires are possible, that over
time you can go from desiring,for example, hookups or affairs
or any number of things that arenot what God wills for us, to,
(11:17):
over time, being someone whodesires God more than anything
else.
We need that kind of truth andso much else.
We need truth about body andsoul and mind and we need truth
to a significant degree and weneed to feast on it.
We need the word of truth,maybe even primarily both Jesus
and the scriptures.
(11:38):
But we can't ignore ourfeelings and if you're a Western
listener in the Western worldmaybe perhaps more than the
Eastern world I'm not positive,but we focus so much on truth in
our sermons, especially ifyou're an evangelical Christian
or you go to a church thatpreaches through the Bible.
(11:59):
We can think that the mainthing or the primary thing
that's going to transform us arenew thoughts, correct thoughts,
true thoughts, and again, thoseare really important, but
they're not all that there is intransformation.
We need to consider our feelings.
When I think about feelings,when I talk, especially right
now, we're in Awaken360, we'rein the heart module, which we're
(12:22):
not really using the heart.
The same way Dallas says, we'reusing it kind of as an
emotional euphemism, like whatyou feel.
We're getting into thesepainful feelings.
We're getting into things thatwe've ignored for years and for
many men, part of why we'venever engaged our feelings, part
of why we haven't invited Godto bring his renovating power
into our feelings, is becausewe're so afraid of that feeling.
(12:47):
Well, first of all, we're juststraight up afraid of that
feeling.
I can just say that with a fullstop.
We are afraid of feelings.
We're afraid of pain, primarilynegative feelings, things that
bring pain.
But what we're also afraid ofis falling into the trap that
seems like so many in the worlddo, which is let your feelings
lead your life.
Feelings should be the captainof your ship.
(13:08):
Feelings should be the core ofwho you are.
You should do what you feel.
If you don't do it, you're notauthentic.
On the other side, for those ofus especially who have grown up
in the church, in whatevercontext, we were often taught
that feelings are dangerous.
You cannot let feelings be inthe driver's seat.
(13:30):
I'll share more of this carimage in a moment.
We can't let feelings be in thedriver's seat.
So what do we do with them?
We throw them in the trunk.
The problem is, when feelingsare thrown in the trunk, they
don't just go away.
When feelings are thrown in thetrunk, they don't just go away
the things we feel.
I had an old supervisor I thinkhe still works for InterVarsity
.
His name's Greg Howe and hetold me this feelings are valid
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data points.
What we feel is actually tryingto tell us something, something
really important, and so if wethrow the feeling in the trunk,
we're missing out on incrediblyimportant data.
The reason you feel angry, thereason you feel shame, the
reason you feel anxious.
There's a reason.
Is what I'm trying to say.
(14:13):
There are reasons that you feelthese things, and so if we just
throw them in the trunk, we'reactually missing out on what
they're trying to tell us.
So here's how I oftenarticulate it to the men in
Awaken.
We're not meant to put thefeeling in the driver's seat,
the way we've seen be soproblematic, but we're also not
meant to put it in the trunk.
Imagine this Imagine a nice car.
(14:33):
You're in the driver's seat,your heart is, so to speak, your
new will in Christ.
God doesn't actually let anyoneelse drive your car, not even
himself.
In a sense, he calls us to takeresponsibility for our own
thoughts and feelings.
So we're driving this car.
Ultimately, the feeling.
(14:54):
I often want to picture Jesus asour navigator.
He's the one telling us whereto go.
He's sitting right in thepassenger seat.
I know that might sounddemeaning, but no, it's a seat
of honor.
He's the passenger prince, he'sthe passenger king.
All right, he's guiding us,we're in conversation with him,
we're in relationship with him.
The feeling can be right in themiddle back seat, sharing what
(15:14):
it wants to share, but notallowing that feeling to then
dictate everything we do.
So here's an example If I feelpain and my immediate thing is
to lash out at my spouse whoreally hurt me, or if I feel
pain and my immediate thing, theimmediate thing I go to, is
pornography, that would be anexample of letting the feeling,
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kind of drive the car.
Instead we can ask questions.
We've used this image before.
We can meet our feeling on theporch to kind of switch the
metaphor up a little bit.
But again, we can let thefeeling, we can give voice to
the feeling without going in thedirection the feeling typically
takes us, because the feeling,without being led on some level
by the truth, by the will, canlead us in places that aren't
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actually good for us, as we wellknow.
So we need to develop arelationship with feelings and
again, I love that idea of it'sthe feeling in the backseat, but
it's Jesus there with ushelping this process through
them as well.
So I'm often telling men I walkwith get as honest and as real
with God as you possibly can.
Get like the psalmist, get yourfeelings completely out there,
(16:23):
because if they're already inthere, god knows.
You're not going to surprisehim, offend him by externalizing
them, but what you are going todo is you're going to get
honest, and this is anotherexample of how the truth sets us
free.
When we get emotionally honestwith God, we're inviting him
into those actual places.
Instead of saying God, talk tothe mask, talk to the mask, talk
(16:46):
to the mask.
We're saying, god, this iswhere I'm really at.
I'm talking to you directly,face to face.
Okay, so we need God'srenovation in our thoughts, we
need truth, we need God'srenovation in our feelings.
We need to direct our feelings,to experience our feelings, to
process them with God and saveothers.
But we also need God'srenovation in the third circle,
(17:08):
the body.
We talk increasingly in thisfield about how our brains have
been wired to go after theunwanted sexual behavior in our
lives, that we've learned tomedicate pain through incredibly
complex neurocircuitry, to goafter dopamine in pornography or
wherever else your sexualbehavior may take you.
(17:29):
So we do need time to rewirethe brain.
This is part of what we have tocontend with in the body.
One really confusing point,hopefully, if you've been
listening to Becoming Whole forany length of time, one
confusing thing in scripture formany people can be the idea of
the flesh, but here at Regen wetalk about how the flesh is
(17:50):
often better translated thesinful nature.
I noticed, though, dallasdoesn't just do that translation
.
He often translates stuff onhis own and he keeps the word
the flesh.
Why?
Because there is still somemeasure of the sinful nature,
the old nature, being stored inour brains Does not mean our
brains are bad, does not meanGod doesn't love our bodies,
(18:13):
didn't choose to create usbodily, didn't come to redeem us
in the body of Jesus.
But what it does mean is thatall the old patterns we've
developed, all the trauma, allthe pain, all the wounds, all
the habits of porn andovereating and alcohol or drugs
or whatever addictions we maystruggle with, have become
(18:34):
habituated in our brains.
So we do need God to rewire ourbrains.
This looks like healing oftrauma in various ways.
We don't have time to get toofar into that today, but we
talked some about that last week.
It looks like engaging inhealthier and holy alternatives.
We talk about this a lot inAwaken, finding things that
(18:55):
bring us incredible joy that Goddesigned us to have joy with.
And it also means doing basicbodily engagement, care, bodily
refreshment.
We need sleep, guys.
We are not unlimited spirits.
We never will be.
I don't know what it'll looklike with our new bodies, but
(19:17):
we're not angels.
We actually are designed by Godto have needs, created by God
to need sleep.
Created by God to need to eat.
We're also created by God tomove our bodies, to exercise in
one form or another.
We need things like water, weneed to breathe.
All of these very basic thingssleep, eating, exercise, water
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and breathing can be helpfulthings to look at.
Not everyone thinks about thesethings.
We think, okay, I'm in thisspiritual struggle, I'm
struggling with sin, but wedon't realize, man, by staying
up until 1 am playing videogames every night, and then I
have to wake up at 7, that mightnot actually be doing me any
favors, because I have to honorthese limits.
God, I need you to refresh andrestore my entire soul, and part
(20:04):
of that is restore how I evenengage my body.
Teach me how to care for thetemple that you've given me and
I think we've.
Often, as Christians, we mightlook at the culture and say,
well, you know, you can go intoover-exercising or not eating to
a really dangerous extent orwhatever, but those twistings
(20:25):
don't negate the original goodthat God designed these things
to bring us.
And I do also want to highlightthings like breath, one of the
best ways to get regulated in aquick moment, even in temptation
.
Notice your breathing.
Take some deep breaths.
God designed the breath.
The breath was not invented by,you know, eastern religions or
something like that.
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God designed us to breathe andto help our bodies regulate
through breathing.
One of my favorite ways to dothis is through breath prayers
Simply breathing in and, as youbreathe in, reminding yourself
of a portion of scripture or ashort prayer.
For example, we're in Psalm 23.
(21:06):
As you breathe in, the Lord ismy shepherd In through the nose,
pushing on the diaphragm, whichis the part that separates your
lungs from your stomach, so youfeel your stomach push out
Slowly in, the Lord is myshepherd, and then slowly out.
I lack nothing.
That's what my translation says.
(21:27):
That's just Psalm 23.1.
Meditating on scripture isgetting scripture deeper in and
it's honoring the fact that,again, our bodies are designed
to need breath that God provides.
So we need to engage healing ofthe body.
Let's move into the socialdimension.
This is now the fourth circleout.
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We are primarily transformedfriends by God's design, through
joyful, loving relationshipswith him and with others.
Even though Adam was walkingthe garden in perfect
relationship or whatever way youwant to imagine the Garden of
Eden looking like, in thisincredible intimacy with God,
god still said it was not goodthat Adam was alone.
(22:10):
So God is wired into us.
I know a lot of our songs sayyou know, all I need is you, god
.
And there's a truth to that,because God supplies all we need
and is, in a sense, all we need, because everything we need
does stem from him, like thehead of a river.
I mean every air, like we justtalked about water.
But if we only needed God inthe shallower sense of the word,
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like hey, I don't need anything, I just need God, we would
quickly die of dehydration, wewould suffocate ourselves, we
would die of starvation, wewould be in mental ruin through
isolation, because God designedus again to need things that he
provides People so key.
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We need loving, joyfulrelationships when we're
connected and when we can beweak, where another person is
strong and we're connected.
In that way, it transforms yourbrain more quickly than almost
anything else.
So the restoring of the socialdimension could look like
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entering into relationships thatGod uses to heal past wounds,
to build maturity where there'sbeen lacking maturity.
One quote I want to share withyou.
This is from an author andtherapist named Jenna Remersma.
Sorry if I pronounced thatwrong.
She says trauma blocks love,but love heals trauma.
(23:44):
Trauma blocks love, but loveheals trauma.
So part of what might be comingup for you when I begin talking
about this social dimension ispeople have hurt me.
You can't imagine the pain I'vebeen through.
Trauma is blocking love.
Trauma is blocking your abilityto connect, maybe even with God
(24:05):
.
So many of us have our image ofGod really tarnished by the sins
done to us by our parents or byauthority figures.
But it doesn't end there.
The story doesn't end therewith.
Trauma builds into more traumaand then we're destroyed.
Love heals trauma, it says inscripture.
We're destroyed.
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Love heals trauma, it says inscripture.
Love covers a multitude of sinsand so perhaps you didn't
receive the care you neededgrowing up from one of your
parents, perhaps you didn'treceive affirmation, perhaps you
were hurt or abused.
The way that God, primarily, isgoing to heal those things is
through loving connection wherewe're synced up in joy with him
and with others who bring thosethings.
(24:47):
So this is a super importantdimension, especially in our
individual culture.
It's something worth.
It's a drum worth beating overand over and over again.
We need loving, joyfulrelationships.
Okay, finally, the soul.
Like I said at the beginning,the soul is the thing that
integrates all the rest.
It's the restoration of allthat we are.
(25:09):
You restore my soul.
You're helping the social, tosync up with the spirit, to sync
up with the body and the mind,and it's all working together in
harmony.
It's all being orchestrated,you could say, by the Holy
Spirit, who's now married to ourrevived spirit, and that is
like the orchestra, the heart,the command center.
(25:29):
It's the conductor of all therest of who we are, and so our
soul is being reintegrated.
So I want to end today with justa short reflection on one of my
favorite passages in scripture.
This is 1 John 3,.
1-3 from the NIV says see whatgreat love the father has
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lavished on us, that we shouldbe called children of God, and
that is what we are.
The reason the world does notknow us is that it did not know
him.
Dear friends, notice he'sspeaking to a group.
We often individualize thesethings.
He's speaking to a group, dearfriends.
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Now we are children of God, andwhat we will be has not yet been
made known.
But we know that when Christappears, we shall be like him,
for we shall see him as he is.
All who have this hope in himpurify themselves.
So, friends, we believe that weare saved by our faith in a
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very important way.
But it says here in verse 3,that we are purified, we're
sanctified through hope, hopingin this, seeing Jesus, hoping in
everything being made rightwhen he comes back, and you
might even say we're glorifiedin his love.
We ultimately enter heaven,which primarily isn't about our
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personal bliss.
It's about the joy, love andbliss of entering into the
triune life, the life of theTrinity itself.
So when we see him, when we seehim face to face, he'll wipe
tears from our eyes and he willmake us.
We'll be transformed into hislikeness, will be transformed
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into his likeness.
So, friends, we're going toartistically engage some of this
kind of broad healing processthat our clients go through at
our upcoming fundraisers inBaltimore and DC.
We'd love to have you join usand kind of get a taste through
some of the art that our clientshave made, some art that we've
made to reflect on things we doat retreats or in groups in
Baltimore, dc.
You can find more informationon those in the show notes.
Let me just say a prayer as Iclose out today.
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Father God, I pray that youwould encourage the listeners
here, that you would restore allof our souls, that you'd give
us the faith that you're doingthis, that you'd give us hope in
you as you're doing this, asyou both remember what you made
us to be, and as you'reremembering us, as you're
putting us back together.
Give us hope in that, in you, inthe process you're doing there
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and, lord, god, most of all,bring us deeper into your love.
Bring us deeper to be satisfiedin the love of all that you are
and loving relationships, god,especially where we need those
to undo and to heal some of theplaces that relationships have
really hurt us.
So bless our listeners, lord,whether they're dealing with
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their own sexual sin or thefallout in their marriage or
relationship, or even whetherthey're trying to walk with,
with children who don't reallyknow how to, how to think
through and heal in all thesesexual ways.
I pray, lord, that you continuethis restoration process and
all of our listeners and thatthat would allow them to better
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love those around them.
Pray all of this in the name ofthe father and of the son and
of the Holy Spirit.
Amen.
God remembers who he created you to be.
Luke 19, 9 through 10 saysJesus said to him.
Today, salvation has come tothis house because this man too
is a son of Abraham, for the Sonof man came to seek and save
(00:22):
the lost.
Today we're continuing ourRemember series on Becoming
Whole.
I'm James, director of projectsas well as spiritual coach and
a group leader here at Regen.
You know an object can only besought and saved if the creator
or owner of that objectremembers what that object
(00:43):
originally was.
Sadly, my wife and I movedrecently and we lost my original
wedding ring.
I often am wearing one of thesesilicone rings, so I can not
scuff up the metal ring, but Ican only seek that ring because
I know what it was.
I can only save that ringbecause I had a vision.
I can see in my mind's eye whatit originally looked like.
(01:06):
So today, for episode four ofthis Remember series on becoming
whole, we're going to talkabout how Jesus remembers us.
We've said that every singleepisode.
God remembers you, butspecifically how he knows what
we were made to be, what we weremade to be, the person the
(01:29):
glorified the original intent ofwhat he made us to be and in
between, you know what we arenow, and that kind of glorified
vision of who we really are, howhe puts together every part of
us.
We've been doing this play onwords.
(01:49):
Remember to remember to putmembers back together, to
reintegrate.
We often say it on this channelwe want to have sexual integrity
, we want to be integratedsexually, we want to become
whole.
We want the parts of us to comeback into alignment to the
whole, being led by the Spirit.
So let me ask you all do youwant to stop sinning sexually?
(02:13):
Many of you who listen to thisare here for that exact reason.
Do you want to heal frombetrayal?
How about do you want to helpyour kid through their own
sexual struggles?
How about do you want to helpyour kid through their own
sexual struggles?
The A to Z of healing is whatPsalm 23 calls the restoring of
our souls.
Psalm 23, I believe it's versethree.
(02:35):
It says you restore my soul.
Now some of the newertranslations use refresh and I
think that there's a power tothat image as well of God
refreshing our souls.
But I like the old translationthat Dallas Willard, who I'm
going to be referencing a lottoday, originally put me onto
(02:55):
that God actually is in thebusiness of restoring our souls.
So I'm going to referenceactually specifically one
particular page from Willard'sbook, incredible book,
life-changing book for me,called the Renovation of the
Heart.
I recently came out with ananniversary edition but if
you're watching on video hereyou'll see I've got one of the
(03:17):
original heart covers.
I believe I inherited this frommy parents' library and this
book was so life-changing,especially some of the pages on
what love is and what it isn't,love and lust.
He actually goes into that alittle bit.
But on page 38 of Renovation ofthe Heart you're going to have
to picture this along with me.
I'm going to do my best topaint this picture but since I
don't have express permission touse this image, you might have
(03:40):
to look it up yourself.
You could look up Dallas Willardum, renovation of the heart,
human person image or somethinglike that.
But imagine five concentriccircle, so like like a target,
like uh, something with abullseye.
So the center circle would bethe bullseye and then that
center circle is surrounded byanother circle and that circle
(04:00):
another, all the way out to fivedifferent circles, the core
circle.
I'm going to just give you aquick flyover of each circle and
then we're going to get intohow God wants to restore all
that we are.
First circle, the inner circle,the bullseye, the heart, is the
heart.
He also calls it the spirit orthe will.
(04:22):
He believes that and I see thisin scripture as well that when
the Bible is using the wordheart, it's not primarily
talking about emotions that'smore of our modern English way
of using the word heart.
Instead, it's talking about thecore of who we are, the center,
the command center, if you will.
That's why the word will is inthere as well.
So the spirit, the heart, thewill is at the core of who we
(04:43):
are.
Next layer out in this pictureof the human person, this target
is the mind.
For Dallas, that includedthoughts and feelings.
I think that's a helpful way tothink about the mind, thoughts
and feelings.
Following circle is the body.
And notice again, because theseare concentric circles, the
body kind of in some sensecontains the mind and contains
(05:06):
the spirit, not in a full sense.
We know that even when ourbodies die, we will still have
our spirits and our minds, butthe ultimate picture that God
gives us of fully restoredhumanity is a new body as well.
So we have our body as the nextcircle, circle number three.
Circle number four is thesocial circle.
(05:27):
This is our relationships.
This is us connecting from bodyto body, from person to person,
and finally, the outer circleis the soul.
What's interesting here is,typically, when we hear the word
soul, we grab on to a Greekunderstanding or perhaps a
Platonic understanding of thesoul as the non-material thing.
(05:49):
So we've got bodies, we've gotsouls.
The soul is like the part thatgoes to heaven when we die For
Dallas and, I believe, for thescriptures, especially in the
Hebrew scriptures.
We can see that the soul iskind of this integrating force
in our whole life.
It integrates the social, thebody, the mind, the spirit, and
that's why it's the outer circle.
(06:10):
So the soul integrates thewhole person.
It could also be used the wordlife could be used here, and
actually the word that's oftentranslated, soul, actually can
be used, for it's used inscripture, I believe for animals
.
They don't have the same kindof soul we have because we have
this mind and this spirit orheart or will.
That makes us different, butthere's something about this
(06:34):
overall idea of an integratinglife.
Okay, so let's get into it.
Let's get into how God seeks torenovate us from the inside out
, going back to the core, thespirit, the heart, the will.
This is the part of us thatdied.
When Adam and Eve first atefrom the fruit from the tree of
the knowledge of good and evil,it says surely, on the day you
(06:55):
eat from that tree.
In scripture it says you willdie.
Now they lived according toscripture, you know hundreds
more years, but they died thatday spiritually.
There was a spiritual death atthe core of who they were and
ultimately, yeah, that rippledout and their bodies died and,
and you know, their whole personeventually died.
(07:16):
But the first core part ofrenovation of the heart is
seeing our heart married, seeingour spirit brought to life by
the holy spirit.
The holy spirit marries ourspirit and brings us to a new
life in christ and part of whathe wants to do.
(07:40):
In that initial moment of faithwe have his spirit come into
the core of who we are.
But the problem is we're notpurely spiritual beings, as I've
already said today.
We're what Christopher Westjokingly calls angel moles.
Right, we're spiritual andphysical, we're body and mind.
We're these dual naturecreatures.
(08:02):
So the problem with having arevived spirit is that it's
still on this earth before we.
We are in the new heavens, anew earth.
Having our spirits reviveddoesn't immediately change our
entire soul.
It changes our spirit.
And so now we've got this flameinside of us, we've got got the
Holy Spirit inside of us, webecome the temple of the Holy
(08:26):
Spirit.
And so now our wills can beengaged toward the good, toward
God, toward things of his designand his desires for us, that we
could only ultimately desire orseek that which isn't of God,
(08:47):
or we couldn't seek God in asuper direct way.
In other words, we couldn'tagape love God before he came
into our hearts and revived us.
But now we need this to workits way out.
We need this to change ourentire soul.
So this is where the mind comesin next.
Now, granted, the mind isactually where we first heard
(09:07):
the gospel.
It says, in this image that I'mreferencing from Renovation of
the Heart, that the word and thespirit of Christ, first the
word of Christ, enters our minds.
We hear the gospel over timewhen that goes from the mind,
just knowing the gospel, knowingthat God loves us and that he
came to save us and have usenter into fellowship with him.
(09:28):
When that goes into spirit.
That's when we're regenerated.
But it does start with the mind.
It comes into the mind first.
You could even say it couldstart with the body.
It comes into your ears first.
It starts with the social.
It comes from another person,so you can see how these circles
again build on each other.
It comes from another person,so you can see how these circles
again build on each other.
But in the mind we havethoughts and feelings.
(09:48):
Thoughts can be restored orrenovated primarily through
engaging with what is true.
Engaging with what is true, ifyou want to think of it, on a
brain level, which I know I'mskipping ahead a little bit to
the body circle when I talkabout the brain.
But on a brain level, this isoften our left brain knowledge.
We can't make this everything,but we can't say this is
(10:11):
unimportant either.
Here's what I mean Learningthat pornography is a sin,
learning that you've experiencedbetrayal, learning even that
your child is giving in tosexual compulsion or has sexual
brokenness, and even learningways to overcome.
That aren't enough on their own, but they are an important
starting point.
(10:31):
We really do benefit from thetruth that sets us free.
I've often said it in my ownjourney, when I first engaged in
Awaken, one of our year-roundgroup for men, awaken 360, I
came across so much that wastrue that I had never known so
much theological truth.
And it wasn't that I was kindof being beaten over the head
(10:53):
with it or whatever, but it waslike it felt like I was
experiencing it, like Jesus said, like the truth that sets us
free.
We need to know what is true.
We need to know that change indesires are possible, that over
time you can go from desiring,for example, hookups or affairs
or any number of things that arenot what God wills for us, to,
(11:17):
over time, being someone whodesires God more than anything
else.
We need that kind of truth andso much else.
We need truth about body andsoul and mind and we need truth
to a significant degree and weneed to feast on it.
We need the word of truth,maybe even primarily both Jesus
and the scriptures.
(11:38):
But we can't ignore ourfeelings and if you're a Western
listener in the Western worldmaybe perhaps more than the
Eastern world I'm not positive,but we focus so much on truth in
our sermons, especially ifyou're an evangelical Christian
or you go to a church thatpreaches through the Bible.
(11:59):
We can think that the mainthing or the primary thing
that's going to transform us arenew thoughts, correct thoughts,
true thoughts, and again, thoseare really important, but
they're not all that there is intransformation.
We need to consider our feelings.
When I think about feelings,when I talk, especially right
now, we're in Awaken360, we'rein the heart module, which we're
(12:22):
not really using the heart.
The same way Dallas says, we'reusing it kind of as an
emotional euphemism, like whatyou feel.
We're getting into thesepainful feelings.
We're getting into things thatwe've ignored for years and for
many men, part of why we'venever engaged our feelings, part
of why we haven't invited Godto bring his renovating power
into our feelings, is becausewe're so afraid of that feeling.
(12:47):
Well, first of all, we're juststraight up afraid of that
feeling.
I can just say that with a fullstop.
We are afraid of feelings.
We're afraid of pain, primarilynegative feelings, things that
bring pain.
But what we're also afraid ofis falling into the trap that
seems like so many in the worlddo, which is let your feelings
lead your life.
Feelings should be the captainof your ship.
(13:08):
Feelings should be the core ofwho you are.
You should do what you feel.
If you don't do it, you're notauthentic.
On the other side, for those ofus especially who have grown up
in the church, in whatevercontext, we were often taught
that feelings are dangerous.
You cannot let feelings be inthe driver's seat.
(13:30):
I'll share more of this carimage in a moment.
We can't let feelings be in thedriver's seat.
So what do we do with them?
We throw them in the trunk.
The problem is, when feelingsare thrown in the trunk, they
don't just go away.
When feelings are thrown in thetrunk, they don't just go away
the things we feel.
I had an old supervisor I thinkhe still works for InterVarsity
.
His name's Greg Howe and hetold me this feelings are valid
(13:52):
data points.
What we feel is actually tryingto tell us something, something
really important, and so if wethrow the feeling in the trunk,
we're missing out on incrediblyimportant data.
The reason you feel angry, thereason you feel shame, the
reason you feel anxious.
There's a reason.
Is what I'm trying to say.
(14:13):
There are reasons that you feelthese things, and so if we just
throw them in the trunk, we'reactually missing out on what
they're trying to tell us.
So here's how I oftenarticulate it to the men in
Awaken.
We're not meant to put thefeeling in the driver's seat,
the way we've seen be soproblematic, but we're also not
meant to put it in the trunk.
Imagine this Imagine a nice car.
(14:33):
You're in the driver's seat,your heart is, so to speak, your
new will in Christ.
God doesn't actually let anyoneelse drive your car, not even
himself.
In a sense, he calls us to takeresponsibility for our own
thoughts and feelings.
So we're driving this car.
Ultimately, the feeling.
(14:54):
I often want to picture Jesus asour navigator.
He's the one telling us whereto go.
He's sitting right in thepassenger seat.
I know that might sounddemeaning, but no, it's a seat
of honor.
He's the passenger prince, he'sthe passenger king.
All right, he's guiding us,we're in conversation with him,
we're in relationship with him.
The feeling can be right in themiddle back seat, sharing what
(15:14):
it wants to share, but notallowing that feeling to then
dictate everything we do.
So here's an example If I feelpain and my immediate thing is
to lash out at my spouse whoreally hurt me, or if I feel
pain and my immediate thing, theimmediate thing I go to, is
pornography, that would be anexample of letting the feeling,
(15:36):
kind of drive the car.
Instead we can ask questions.
We've used this image before.
We can meet our feeling on theporch to kind of switch the
metaphor up a little bit.
But again, we can let thefeeling, we can give voice to
the feeling without going in thedirection the feeling typically
takes us, because the feeling,without being led on some level
by the truth, by the will, canlead us in places that aren't
(16:02):
actually good for us, as we wellknow.
So we need to develop arelationship with feelings and
again, I love that idea of it'sthe feeling in the backseat, but
it's Jesus there with ushelping this process through
them as well.
So I'm often telling men I walkwith get as honest and as real
with God as you possibly can.
Get like the psalmist, get yourfeelings completely out there,
(16:23):
because if they're already inthere, god knows.
You're not going to surprisehim, offend him by externalizing
them, but what you are going todo is you're going to get
honest, and this is anotherexample of how the truth sets us
free.
When we get emotionally honestwith God, we're inviting him
into those actual places.
Instead of saying God, talk tothe mask, talk to the mask, talk
(16:46):
to the mask.
We're saying, god, this iswhere I'm really at.
I'm talking to you directly,face to face.
Okay, so we need God'srenovation in our thoughts, we
need truth, we need God'srenovation in our feelings.
We need to direct our feelings,to experience our feelings, to
process them with God and saveothers.
But we also need God'srenovation in the third circle,
(17:08):
the body.
We talk increasingly in thisfield about how our brains have
been wired to go after theunwanted sexual behavior in our
lives, that we've learned tomedicate pain through incredibly
complex neurocircuitry, to goafter dopamine in pornography or
wherever else your sexualbehavior may take you.
(17:29):
So we do need time to rewirethe brain.
This is part of what we have tocontend with in the body.
One really confusing point,hopefully, if you've been
listening to Becoming Whole forany length of time, one
confusing thing in scripture formany people can be the idea of
the flesh, but here at Regen wetalk about how the flesh is
(17:50):
often better translated thesinful nature.
I noticed, though, dallasdoesn't just do that translation
.
He often translates stuff onhis own and he keeps the word
the flesh.
Why?
Because there is still somemeasure of the sinful nature,
the old nature, being stored inour brains Does not mean our
brains are bad, does not meanGod doesn't love our bodies,
(18:13):
didn't choose to create usbodily, didn't come to redeem us
in the body of Jesus.
But what it does mean is thatall the old patterns we've
developed, all the trauma, allthe pain, all the wounds, all
the habits of porn andovereating and alcohol or drugs
or whatever addictions we maystruggle with, have become
(18:34):
habituated in our brains.
So we do need God to rewire ourbrains.
This looks like healing oftrauma in various ways.
We don't have time to get toofar into that today, but we
talked some about that last week.
It looks like engaging inhealthier and holy alternatives.
We talk about this a lot inAwaken, finding things that
(18:55):
bring us incredible joy that Goddesigned us to have joy with.
And it also means doing basicbodily engagement, care, bodily
refreshment.
We need sleep, guys.
We are not unlimited spirits.
We never will be.
I don't know what it'll looklike with our new bodies, but
(19:17):
we're not angels.
We actually are designed by Godto have needs, created by God
to need sleep.
Created by God to need to eat.
We're also created by God tomove our bodies, to exercise in
one form or another.
We need things like water, weneed to breathe.
All of these very basic thingssleep, eating, exercise, water
(19:40):
and breathing can be helpfulthings to look at.
Not everyone thinks about thesethings.
We think, okay, I'm in thisspiritual struggle, I'm
struggling with sin, but wedon't realize, man, by staying
up until 1 am playing videogames every night, and then I
have to wake up at 7, that mightnot actually be doing me any
favors, because I have to honorthese limits.
God, I need you to refresh andrestore my entire soul, and part
(20:04):
of that is restore how I evenengage my body.
Teach me how to care for thetemple that you've given me and
I think we've.
Often, as Christians, we mightlook at the culture and say,
well, you know, you can go intoover-exercising or not eating to
a really dangerous extent orwhatever, but those twistings
(20:25):
don't negate the original goodthat God designed these things
to bring us.
And I do also want to highlightthings like breath, one of the
best ways to get regulated in aquick moment, even in temptation
.
Notice your breathing.
Take some deep breaths.
God designed the breath.
The breath was not invented by,you know, eastern religions or
something like that.
(20:46):
God designed us to breathe andto help our bodies regulate
through breathing.
One of my favorite ways to dothis is through breath prayers
Simply breathing in and, as youbreathe in, reminding yourself
of a portion of scripture or ashort prayer.
For example, we're in Psalm 23.
(21:06):
As you breathe in, the Lord ismy shepherd In through the nose,
pushing on the diaphragm, whichis the part that separates your
lungs from your stomach, so youfeel your stomach push out
Slowly in, the Lord is myshepherd, and then slowly out.
I lack nothing.
That's what my translation says.
(21:27):
That's just Psalm 23.1.
Meditating on scripture isgetting scripture deeper in and
it's honoring the fact that,again, our bodies are designed
to need breath that God provides.
So we need to engage healing ofthe body.
Let's move into the socialdimension.
This is now the fourth circleout.
(21:47):
We are primarily transformedfriends by God's design, through
joyful, loving relationshipswith him and with others.
Even though Adam was walkingthe garden in perfect
relationship or whatever way youwant to imagine the Garden of
Eden looking like, in thisincredible intimacy with God,
god still said it was not goodthat Adam was alone.
(22:10):
So God is wired into us.
I know a lot of our songs sayyou know, all I need is you, god
.
And there's a truth to that,because God supplies all we need
and is, in a sense, all we need, because everything we need
does stem from him, like thehead of a river.
I mean every air, like we justtalked about water.
But if we only needed God inthe shallower sense of the word,
(22:34):
like hey, I don't need anything, I just need God, we would
quickly die of dehydration, wewould suffocate ourselves, we
would die of starvation, wewould be in mental ruin through
isolation, because God designedus again to need things that he
provides People so key.
(22:56):
We need loving, joyfulrelationships when we're
connected and when we can beweak, where another person is
strong and we're connected.
In that way, it transforms yourbrain more quickly than almost
anything else.
So the restoring of the socialdimension could look like
(23:18):
entering into relationships thatGod uses to heal past wounds,
to build maturity where there'sbeen lacking maturity.
One quote I want to share withyou.
This is from an author andtherapist named Jenna Remersma.
Sorry if I pronounced thatwrong.
She says trauma blocks love,but love heals trauma.
(23:44):
Trauma blocks love, but loveheals trauma.
So part of what might be comingup for you when I begin talking
about this social dimension ispeople have hurt me.
You can't imagine the pain I'vebeen through.
Trauma is blocking love.
Trauma is blocking your abilityto connect, maybe even with God
(24:05):
.
So many of us have our image ofGod really tarnished by the sins
done to us by our parents or byauthority figures.
But it doesn't end there.
The story doesn't end therewith.
Trauma builds into more traumaand then we're destroyed.
Love heals trauma, it says inscripture.
We're destroyed.
(24:26):
Love heals trauma, it says inscripture.
Love covers a multitude of sinsand so perhaps you didn't
receive the care you neededgrowing up from one of your
parents, perhaps you didn'treceive affirmation, perhaps you
were hurt or abused.
The way that God, primarily, isgoing to heal those things is
through loving connection wherewe're synced up in joy with him
and with others who bring thosethings.
(24:47):
So this is a super importantdimension, especially in our
individual culture.
It's something worth.
It's a drum worth beating overand over and over again.
We need loving, joyfulrelationships.
Okay, finally, the soul.
Like I said at the beginning,the soul is the thing that
integrates all the rest.
It's the restoration of allthat we are.
(25:09):
You restore my soul.
You're helping the social, tosync up with the spirit, to sync
up with the body and the mind,and it's all working together in
harmony.
It's all being orchestrated,you could say, by the Holy
Spirit, who's now married to ourrevived spirit, and that is
like the orchestra, the heart,the command center.
(25:29):
It's the conductor of all therest of who we are, and so our
soul is being reintegrated.
So I want to end today with justa short reflection on one of my
favorite passages in scripture.
This is 1 John 3,.
1-3 from the NIV says see whatgreat love the father has
(25:51):
lavished on us, that we shouldbe called children of God, and
that is what we are.
The reason the world does notknow us is that it did not know
him.
Dear friends, notice he'sspeaking to a group.
We often individualize thesethings.
He's speaking to a group, dearfriends.
(26:15):
Now we are children of God, andwhat we will be has not yet been
made known.
But we know that when Christappears, we shall be like him,
for we shall see him as he is.
All who have this hope in himpurify themselves.
So, friends, we believe that weare saved by our faith in a
(26:40):
very important way.
But it says here in verse 3,that we are purified, we're
sanctified through hope, hopingin this, seeing Jesus, hoping in
everything being made rightwhen he comes back, and you
might even say we're glorifiedin his love.
We ultimately enter heaven,which primarily isn't about our
(27:03):
personal bliss.
It's about the joy, love andbliss of entering into the
triune life, the life of theTrinity itself.
So when we see him, when we seehim face to face, he'll wipe
tears from our eyes and he willmake us.
We'll be transformed into hislikeness, will be transformed
(27:28):
into his likeness.
So, friends, we're going toartistically engage some of this
kind of broad healing processthat our clients go through at
our upcoming fundraisers inBaltimore and DC.
We'd love to have you join usand kind of get a taste through
some of the art that our clientshave made, some art that we've
made to reflect on things we doat retreats or in groups in
Baltimore, dc.
You can find more informationon those in the show notes.
Let me just say a prayer as Iclose out today.
(27:53):
Father God, I pray that youwould encourage the listeners
here, that you would restore allof our souls, that you'd give
us the faith that you're doingthis, that you'd give us hope in
you as you're doing this, asyou both remember what you made
us to be, and as you'reremembering us, as you're
putting us back together.
Give us hope in that, in you, inthe process you're doing there
(28:17):
and, lord, god, most of all,bring us deeper into your love.
Bring us deeper to be satisfiedin the love of all that you are
and loving relationships, god,especially where we need those
to undo and to heal some of theplaces that relationships have
really hurt us.
So bless our listeners, lord,whether they're dealing with
(28:40):
their own sexual sin or thefallout in their marriage or
relationship, or even whetherthey're trying to walk with,
with children who don't reallyknow how to, how to think
through and heal in all thesesexual ways.
I pray, lord, that you continuethis restoration process and
all of our listeners and thatthat would allow them to better
(29:01):
love those around them.
Pray all of this in the name ofthe father and of the son and
of the Holy Spirit.
Amen.
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