UNCLE SAM

Happy Fourth of July! We really haven't done much with this holiday, so we thought it was an appropriate time to celebrate with William Lustig's 1996 slasher Uncle Sam, a film that features tons of jingoistic American festivities while being pretty blatantly critical of US politics and war. While the film is a bit lackluster, we have a lot of fun calling out the crazy things in the movie: from a peeping tom on stilts, to a fireworks injury, to how good the smoked ribs look. We're also drinking Druthers Brewing Company's Saratoga Vibes lemon-lime pilsner!

Approximate timeline

0:00-11:00 Intro

11:00-20:00 Beer talk

20:00-end Uncle Sam

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Well, I I grew up during Vietnamand many people thought that was
an unjust war. Many young people like myself
protested the war. In fact, some people left the
country for a while. Ran away.
It was a very difficult thing todo Jodie, but you have to

(00:21):
understand those who left the country felt it was a lesser
evil and blindly following orders they knew were wrong.
My Uncle Sam said you guys were cowards, OK?
Please just take your seat. I didn't say you were.

(00:45):
I just said that's what he said.Hey guys, welcome back to the

(01:24):
Blown Micron Podcast. I'm Ryan from coldsplatation.com
and I'm joined with my Co host Spartan.
How's it going? We're doing well and actually
feeling just a little bit patriotic today.
We are heading right into 4th of.
July. And I thought, you know, we

(01:44):
don't generally do any 4th of July episodes too.
No. No.
So we thought, you know what, maybe now is the time to really
get into the spirit, especially considering we've got lots of
stuff going on. You know, we've got Alligator
Alcatraz, Auschwitz coming, as they're calling it.

(02:06):
Oh, they added an Auschwitz to it.
I know about alligator. Alligator Auschwitz, we've got,
you know, this Medicaid spendingcut coming as well with the
giant big BBBLBBBBB big bill so.Everyone in the media should be
fired for letting that go. Yeah, exactly.

(02:27):
Called letting it like the big beautiful bill.
So it's like, how can you not feel patriotic?
In such wonderful times, Such wonderful.
Times and of course, so like in a, you know, we're we don't it's
not like we have guns to our heads here being forced to do a
nice patriotic episode, but it was fun.

(02:50):
And you know, there's, there's one movie that I could think of
that was like right on the moneyof a, like a, a movie that we
haven't done that sits in our wheelhouse of things that we,
you know, have done previously is situated around the 4th of
July. And it just made sense to try to

(03:11):
incorporate that because our episode this week is going to
drop on July 4th. So Joe, when you're out
barbecuing and you're having your your hot dogs and your
hamburgers and, you know, maybe steak or smoking up smoking it
out there. Smoking a pancake.
You you might want to go on our.Podcast watching the Yankees
lose to the Mass. Yeah, well.

(03:33):
Well, I'll be at work. I'll, I'll be at work all
weekend. So, you know, I'll be, you know,
goose stepping it at my job. So yeah.
You're goose stepping. I'm off for a couple weeks, so
I'll be celebrating and enjoyingthings.

(03:54):
So without further ado, we're talking about we're going to be
doing Bill Lustigs Uncle Sam. Oh, I thought I was Canadian
bacon. I know I'm not comedian babe and
what's my picture? Do you care?
I don't do that. I've been in enough marching
bands. I don't need to be listening to

(04:15):
it here and there too. I do wonder how many people are
these, you know, the other regular patriots among us, Are
they just going around listeningto that type of media big band?
No, because I think it's. I think.
It's big band in the sense of like, you know, like jazz, jazz
tunes. I mean that kind of big band.
I mean like sousaphone band. I think that kind of stuff is

(04:35):
totally dead. Like the one thing that's great
about this movie is that they play the stars and shapes
forever on like repeat. It's God, isn't that great?
Like, you know, and it's like that's been totally replaced by
Toby Keith. Like we'll put a boot in your
breast, you know, so. Yeah, you know what it makes you

(04:56):
It. Makes you.
It makes you yearn for a simpler, better time where you
know the. Didn't replace the the classics.
Yeah. The good thing about those
classics too is that, and I think probably that happened for
Uncle Sam. And they are pretty much
copyright free too. So you're kind of free to use
them because you, you know, you cite, you know, somebody comes

(05:16):
at you with a copyright claim, you say.
You cite patriotism, you say? Excuse.
Me. This one's free for all of us in
the home of the free. So, you know, there's no
copyright needed here. But I think that's part of the
reason why they use it in the film.
But, you know, it was a lot cheaper than having to actually

(05:37):
have a soundtrack. But yeah, that reminds me, you
know, your talk of country musicand how it's kind of replaced
the patriotism of, you know, classic, you know, John Phillips
Sousa tracks. I was at the brewery the other
day, Treehouse Brewery, and they're they were playing some
pretty awful country music, not really sure why.

(05:58):
And I was in the bathroom and itwas almost like this this is a
real song. This is a true this seriously a
song. But I thought I was in like a a
parody land of like what somebody who wrote a country
music song was like making fun of it.
But because the lyrics are literally like, I want a time
when beer was cheaper and gas was cheaper and grandpa's didn't

(06:20):
die. See, no way.
Come on. This is not a real song.
Then I went out to my dad, who is a big country music fan.
I was like, yeah, there's there's this song playing in the
bathroom about like this, how beer is expensive and grandpa's,
they want grandpa's to not die. My dad was like, oh, yeah, it's
a great song. It's a great song.
I was like, what the fuck is this?
This is this is this is like a parody of a parody.

(06:45):
This bro country, bro country isso obtuse and terrible it hurts
my soul. Like let's don't listen to
Sturgill Simpson. Do listen to some drive by truck
or something real. Not this nonsense because it is
even Bo Burnham had like a joke like 15 years ago now about
like, you know, like, like it pandering because it's like,
what's the song? Like Cold bear went to church.

(07:08):
Daddy told me to go go to pray. Little girls in skirts and
trucks. Hey, hey, before the country
song. And it's like.
That's why I thought it was a parody.
It was like, and it was like on the nose of a parody, too.
I was like, oh, come on, this is.
This has got to be. Anyway, at least totally meant
if you do like that song, yeah. Fuck him.

(07:30):
No, fuck him. At least Zach Top's bringing
back some Alan Jackson, so yeah.Yeah, yeah, I just had to
mention that. Especially, you know, on a
patriotic show like, like this one about Uncle Sam.
I needed to get that in there. So have you ever seen Uncle Sam?
Ever heard of Uncle Sam? No.
Never see this was a movie from my childhood, not because I ever

(07:54):
watched it back then, because I knew even at that time probably
stay away from that movie. It's probably not that good.
But it was in the same wheelhouse as something like
Jack Frost because it was directto video.
It was in all of the, you know, the video stores at the time,
released on VHS, came out in 1996 and it had the lenticular

(08:20):
VHS cover. If you don't know what
lenticular means, it's the ones where it's like got the 3D image
where you like put it in the light at one way and it's
normal. And then you turn it a little
bit and then it changes to a different image.
That's lenticular. And it these VHS ones, Jack
Frost had one, Uncle Sam had one.
They were the big thing because they was eye-catching on the on

(08:43):
the shelf. You're like, holy shit, that's
where the fucking. That's where the money went
exactly. Not into the film, not into the
film itself. They they knew it was going
straight to VHS. Exactly.
They were like, how do we, how do we, how do we get
blockbusters to buy? This one, absolutely.
They were like, this is this is definitely hitting VHS.
It is never hitting theaters. So we need a really, really good

(09:07):
marketing scheme. When it hits VHS, and I do, I
will, I totally admit that I think that that was a big reason
why we are still talking about Jack Frost and Uncle Sam to this
day. In terms of people who have a
really like soft nostalgic spot for those movies is just simply
because they were eye-catching with that lenticular cover.

(09:28):
And it sticks with you throughout the years because I
definitely remember. And I don't remember if it was
my dad's shop or if it was just our local Video world video
store, but one of them definitely had the Uncle Sam
BHS. And I just remember that
lenticular cover constantly catching your eye.
So whoever came up with that, you know, props to you because

(09:50):
they definitely made a lasting impression.
And even now Blue underground has, you know, recent, like
within the past two years, I think it was released Uncle Sam
on 4K and they brought back the lenticular covers.
You know, it's obviously different.
They, they changed it up for, you know, the new release, but
they brought the lenticular cover back because they know

(10:10):
that's what sells stuff. So they, they provided a slip
cover of that. And you know, Bill Lustig is
intimately part of Blue Underground as well, the
director of Uncle Sam and he runs, you know, that company.
So, you know, there was definitely some some reasons to
be releasing Uncle Sam on 4K because I don't know how many

(10:32):
people are asking for Uncle Sam on 4K as we'll get into and this
episode. I mean, not not sure how many
people I'm I'm a dummy. I bought it.
You know, oh, you didn't even, you didn't even get that one as
a review copy. You you actually put money on.
For some reason I missed out on this one.
Yeah, I missed out on this one for a review copy so.

(10:53):
It's always a good ones. Yep, so.
Sidebar sidebar. Who would you rather listen to
in the big band world of music? Even though one of them is not
big bad but speaking purely American Music, John Phillips
Sousa or Stephen Foster songs? Well, Sousa is like the classic,

(11:16):
right? Like like classic classic
marching band esque. But as I say, Steve, well,
Stephen Foster is not marching band music.
But, you know, it's yeah. Oh, Suzanne, a Camtown racist,
don't you? I'm.
I'm going to say Susa. I do find I find like Camtown
races to be particularly annoying.

(11:39):
How? I don't know.
I just, I don't know. So I I would go with Susa.
How about you? How about you?
Think of more of a Stephen Foster guy.
Are you? Yeah, it's just like the
folkiness of it all. I mean, it's not big band.
I mean, it's not, you know, as you said, sousaphone, like
marching band. But they're both great.
Like, you know, they're, you know, I think 2 great little

(12:01):
parts of American, you know, American Music, 1840s and 50s
folk music and marching band anthems.
It's what we are today. Like I said, this is what we
need back in our God damn parades.
OK? I need, you know, the float
being, you know, pushed along by, you know, anchors away, not

(12:22):
this nonsense, you know, or. You know, you could even include
Francis Scott Key in there, as the film points out, saying,
well, he didn't have any more hits besides the Star Spangled
Banner, which, you know, again, he didn't even compose the Star
Spangled Banner, wrote the poem for the Star Spangled Banner,
but still. How dare you?
As this movie points out. Look, the Fort Mchenry's being

(12:43):
shelled into oblivion by the British.
I should write a poem from this boat.
All right, anything else to add in our intro?
From, oh, Uncle Sam, local, local folklore for us around
here in upstate New York, based out of Troy.

(13:06):
So there you go. Yeah.
We interestingly too, we don't have a lot of appearances of
Uncle Sam around us that I know of.
Like it's not something, you know, like you even you said
that he's local. Technically, it's not like we
have like Uncle Sam Day over here for 4th of July.
That's really not a. Yeah, Troy.

(13:27):
Well, let's say Troy can't be bothered.
They have better things to do. Exactly.
Yeah, Yeah. I don't.
I don't well. Uncle Sam's kind of fallen out
of like the popular culture. Too sure.
Like, you know, I mean, people will say like, oh, you got to
pay your dues to Uncle Sam or something.
But, you know, it's not like people run around like, hey,

(13:47):
Uncle Sam. Even that pay, you know, even
that phrase, pay your dues, Sam,is kind of like a negative.
You know, that's like, hey, it'susually hard in line.
Maybe we'll pay your education. That or someone's usually
bitching about taxes, like, oh, I got to pay my taxes and all
that. Yep, there it's, it's mostly in
a negative connotation. So sorry, Uncle Sam, you've kind

(14:10):
of fallen to the wayside. The the only thing I think would
be a reference to Uncle Sam now is what's that?
Isn't there like a insurance agency or something that has
Uncle Sam in it, Something like that?
Probably in general. Well, yeah, I guess I'm thinking
of the maybe I'm thinking of thegeneral.
I thought there was one that hadUncle Sam specifically.

(14:32):
And maybe now maybe I'm just thinking of Better Call Saul.
I don't know. Oh no, what am I going to do?
Better call. Saul yeah, so.
That's one of my favorite thingsof all time to say hi.
I'm Saul Goodman, turning at law.
You know that you have rights. Constitution says you do.

(14:56):
All right, let's get into the beer that.
We have on the show. I sure just watched Better call
Tall instead of this. There you go.
Yeah. All right.
What do we got on the show today?
I'll tell you, I didn't pick it out.
My wife did. She was in the.
I knew I needed to get beer thisweek.
She was in the store. I was like, hey, just grab me a
four pack of anything that's there.
She decided where she was going to grab the Druthers Brewing

(15:19):
Company, which was a local brewery here in our 518 area in
Saratoga, NY. Saratoga Springs, NY.
She grabbed the. I'm pretty sure it's going to be
renamed Dave Portnoy Land, right?
Yeah, 'cause it's his summer home now.
Unfortunately, no. She grabbed Saratoga Vibes,

(15:39):
which is a light lager with lemon and lime, which is a new.
Well, it's actually not new. I think they started it last
year. Beer that they've been making
for spec. Well, they do.
I was saying it's been around for a couple of years.
Like I think they just do different versions of it because
this is the first time where it's a lemon lime one because

(16:00):
it's like the Saratoga 5 has hasbeen around for a couple of
years now. So.
I thought the last one that was.The last one we got wasn't tall
boys and we did it on the show. I think it was just like, you
can correct me if I'm wrong, O keeper, the untapped, but I
think it was just like a lime logger and I think one of them

(16:20):
was a night but one year. I think you're thinking of
because I don't think we we havenot done this one on the show.
I believe you're thinking of theToys for Tots that they do.
Both I. Don't know if we have added on
the show, I don't remember. Well, no, it's not Like I said,

(16:41):
I think it's just they've changed up every year.
Could be because I haven't. Hold on, I'll be, I'll be right
back. I have a can of one of them, so
as you're talking about the beer, let me go check.
All right. You you check it out.
I'll continue on with the beer. This is a 5% beer.
It is a light pilsner style brewed lime and lemon.

(17:03):
They have, like I said, they make this for SPAC made to be so
SPAC is our local like Amphitheatre outdoor area that
you can go to see Dave Matthews Band basically because that's
pretty much that's, that's who'sthere now, you know, Dave
Matthews Band. And other say that.

(17:25):
And so you know it's made to be drank at SPAC basically because
Saratoga is Druthers hometown. They have a few locations but
Saratoga is like the main 1 and so they.
Unfortunately for them, to tree house is literally right across
the street. Yeah, it's right down the
street, you know, So what you find on the can.

(17:47):
It's the same beer I do have. I have a tall boy from like 2
years ago, and this is actually nice artwork that they had
because I remember getting it after you mentioned something
about it. So I think we did do it on the
podcast, but maybe. But it's got like the nice like
artwork similar, but it's of theactual Amphitheatre itself from
the outside. So it's got, you know, and I do

(18:09):
pretty. Nice Dave Matthews Band yodeling
on stage there. It's all just ants marching,
just like for three hours. Like her being here, Harper and
her. And the electric violin.
So I think maybe we're safe, safe from the DMV.
So but anyway, yeah, if we have had this, sorry, but we're going

(18:30):
to do a repeat. It's perfect perfect for the
summer season though obviously it's lemon and lime tastes
pretty good. I think that this beer is pretty
good. It has a, it has a fair amount
of lime and lemon to it. I do think that it comes off a
little bit bitter at times, possibly the coriander maybe a
little bit too strong at times. You know, they're adding

(18:51):
coriander to it as though it's sort of like a, a wheat beer of
sorts, sort of like a Blue Mooney style.
I feel like it does add a littlebit of bitterness to it that
comes off at the end of the the,you know, after you finish
swallowing. But other than that, I think
it's pretty good. It's pretty drinkable and at 5%
I think it's like light enough where you could have a couple of

(19:13):
them and not really worry too much about it.
So I enjoy it. I think it's, you know, it's a
pretty fine brew from them, nicelight pilsner and you know, with
enough flavour where it doesn't,it's the lime and lemon is not
tasting too like fake or adjuncttea in my opinion.
What do you think? I like it even though I'm pretty

(19:36):
sure we have done it for show, but then again we're on almost
episode 400 so it doesn't matter.
OK playoff Osmo. But I do like it, especially in
the sweltering heat that we've way we've been having.
It's the lemon. I would say I don't taste as
much as it's more lime forward. You're right, it does have like

(19:56):
a peppery coriander taste at theend.
It gives it a little bit of the Bender bitterness to round it
out for a lager. It's very refreshing and Chris
has a nice mouthfeel to it. It's a perfect, you know, if
you're hanging out on the 4th ofJuly grilling, this would be a
good partner to have. The one sin of it is like for a

(20:18):
four pack of this kind of stuff,it should be a six pack even
though it's 16 ounces or tall boy, you know, see the like,
like I have from a couple years ago, the tall boys are the way
to go. If you have grab a couple of
those, you're good for the day. You know, praise God that Sam
Adams is starting to do that with like the summer ale
Perfect. You just grab a couple of those

(20:38):
and be like, I'm good for the day.
Yeah, yeah. I think, I think like that, this
whole thing with the four packs,again, we go over this multi.
Times. Yeah, when you have like a light
lager like this pilsner style and you get it in a four pack,
it is a little bit disappointingbecause again, you know, the
four pack idea was kind of started because it would be

(21:01):
exorbitantly expensive to marketcertain beers as a six pack.
You know, it's just additional like beer cost because it's more
expensive to make that beer. And then when you factor it in
like this is a pilsner, it's pretty standard style.
There's not like a whole lot going into it that's really
expensive. You know, like it's not as

(21:23):
expensive as like a double IPA per SE, but then it ends up
being the same cost as a double IPA at times.
You're like, why couldn't it just be a six pack?
You know, So it does feel like, you know, you miss out on some
things when there's a pilsner and a four pack, but I don't
know. But anyway, I do think it's good

(21:44):
if you have a chance to check itout.
If you're going to SPAC, I do believe SPAC has this available
there, probably for $16.00 a can.
I would imagine even more, somebody said like a Miller.
Now it's like $19.00. I don't know exactly how much
but the last time I was at SPAC I think it was like 15 something
for a can so. Would that be when we went to

(22:09):
American around that? Was probably like 15 years ago,
so it's probably doubled to. See Dylan Wilko, Ryan Bingham,
and My Morning Jacket. Yep, that's probably the last
time I've been there. I think the last show I saw
there was Hall and Oates and Squeeze.
Yeah, sorry. John Hall and Darrell Hall, you

(22:32):
know. You know.
All right, let's get into the illustrious Uncle Sam.
From 2006. 2006. This movie's clearly a satire on
the Iraq War. Yeah, right.
I mean, well, you know, again, it's.

(22:53):
Oh, wait, oh wait, it is. But of, you know, the Persian
Gulf War, the. Yeah, the one before that one,
Yeah, yeah. Herbert Walker, Thousand Points
of Light Homeless Man take thosetaxes.
Job it who do? I cannot.
That's me doing the Dana Carvey Herbert Walker Bush impression.

(23:13):
It was great. It was a good one.
Thank you it. Was a good one.
I was, I was told that I do the 1000 points light like we're
pretty good so. It is pretty good.
I mean, you do. You sound more like Dana Carvey
than you do. Well, that's what he was doing.
Yeah. Yeah.
Do people even remembering that,you know, Herbert Walker was
even in the office, or do they just black out the four years in
between Reagan and Clinton? Probably.

(23:35):
But yes, you're right, I do think that this movie is a
pretty good counterpoint to thattime period.
Because when you think, you know, like again, Uncle Sam is a
movie that for all intents and purposes, when you look at it on
the surface, looks like it couldbe a fun slasher film set around

(23:56):
4th of July, which is effectively like copying any
other holiday themed movie, a slasher movie, right?
So like it's, you know, you can think of it as Halloween for the
4th of July, which in that senseyou would expect the movie to be
just like full of 4th of July regalia, you know, America First

(24:17):
style jingoism that you see all over the place and a guy killing
people, right? And that's pretty much what I
would have expected from Uncle Sam on the surface.
But then when you really get into it, it's pretty clear very
quickly in the movie, like even in the first 3 minutes, I think

(24:41):
that the film is going to be pretty critical of the American
sentiment to war. And especially that time period
of the Persian Gulf War and evenwars like Vietnam are mentioned
in this movie as well to to kindof like a not directly point out

(25:03):
the fact that a lot of times America's been kind of wrong
about doing more stuff. But it's funny.
It's, it's really just funny to look back on because of granted,
we were like 6-7 years old. I don't really remember,
especially in our small rural part of upstate New York.
I don't really remember everyonebeing, you know, jingoistic.

(25:28):
Too busy. To the extent of what you see in
Uncle Sam, You mean like, yeah. Like, yeah, it's the Clinton
years. It's not like, I mean, yeah,
Persian, you know. I mean, you know, Desert Storm
happens, but it's over in a blanket of an eye.
And that was under HW Bush's watch.

(25:48):
I don't. I mean, and it just seems weird.
I don't recall. I mean, again, that like you
said, we were young, but I don'trecall the country being
incredibly jingoistic at the time.
I mean, I think it's, again, there's this idea of a little

(26:09):
bit of parody and Uncle Sam of kind of amplifying the fact that
the point itself, right? Like 'cause the 4th of July is a
time period where we like to, wereally like to go balls to the
wall in terms of Americana. And it's, you know, like, like
you said, certain areas may not be as over the top as it's shown

(26:32):
in Uncle Sam. But the idea of it is that like
we really do celebrate the 4th of July to like a, a pretty
enormous extent where you've got, you know, various fireworks
celebrations all over the place.You know, we, we wrap, we pull
out all the, the American flags that we own, stick them on, you

(26:52):
know, flag poles and light polesand everything else.
You know, you, you might pull out all of your veterans, you
know, dead veterans to memorialize them.
It was kind of like it's, you know, a night at the museum.
We saw, you know, Ted, Teddy Roosevelt, you know, Paul, you
know, like everyone there. But I mean, there is a nice

(27:15):
community about it though, because again, like, it's like
every year for 4th of July, we had the parade, we have a
picnic, everyone's pitching in, you know?
So like, it's not just it isolated.
Like This Is Us on our lake house heading the 4th of July.
Stay away, everybody. But yeah, I mean, like I said,
like it just, I feel like the message is totally muddled,

(27:39):
muddled in this film because, one, it doesn't portray the
message well and we can get intothat more in a bit.
But two, again, I think wrong time for that message because
again, it's kind of like we weren't even in like, Kosovo or
anything. Yeah, I've been granted.
Like, it's not if they mentionedlike other things like at the
time, like, you know, like Somalia with Black Hawk Down and

(28:03):
like, you know, you know, the Persian Gulf and other like
conflicts they, you know, briefly mentioned like Grenada,
like Uncle Sam was in Grenada inPanama.
And it's like to most people that like, no one's going to
know what the hell they're talking about, you know?
Yeah, what's that the kid was talking about?
They're like, what? Grenada.

(28:24):
Wasn't that like a 2 day thing? I mean, I think, you know, I
think getting down to it, I do feel like this does make sense
to posthumously kind of parody the the Gulf War a little bit.

(28:45):
And I think that it does that toa certain extent, I will agree.
And as we'll get into Uncle Sam's, the the actual plot line
and the the message that's trying to send is pretty
muddled. You know, Larry Cohen, who's the
writer on this movie, has written some really great movies
that have been, you know, very throughout the ages,
exceptionally critical of a lot of like societal elements,

(29:10):
especially in America. God told me to being a great 1
from 1976. If you haven't seen that one, go
check it out. Very, very much akin to like a
kind of like a murder mystery type thing that happens in New
York City with like random murders that are being
committed. It's a very good movie.

(29:32):
Well, we should do it because itwas came out of my birthday.
Yeah, it's alive as well, you know, kind of commenting on on
abortion and and devil babies. He's rated some great movies,
like schlocky movies. But again, like I said, very
socially relevant and you know, lots of commentary on that.

(29:57):
I think Uncle Sam, again, was, was meant to be sort of a
commentary on the fact that we often kind of support the war
effort and soldiers, when in reality, at times, you know,
even soldiers should kind of question why they're going to
war. And that kind of comes up during

(30:18):
that one conversation in this movie where the teacher is
talking to Jodie and where Jodiewas like, my, my uncle went to
war and he said anybody who didn't go to war and ran away
are cowards. And the teacher's like, mom,
that's your opinion, son. That's, that's your, your
uncle's opinion. But it was very difficult for

(30:39):
all of us during Vietnam to justbe ABS abstainers, I think.
I think as like, like this is one thing that I've always kind
of criticized and I've mentionedit before on the podcast
briefly, but like one thing thatI constantly I criticize as an
idea now, is we over corrected as a society after Vietnam?

(31:00):
Like should you have been, you know, berating and calling the
people and you know, soldiers coming back like baby killers
and stuff? No, because most of them were
drafted. They didn't have a choice.
They were sent over there, but we overcorrected as a society
that like our warriors, wounded warriors, we're free because of
them. They bless us.

(31:21):
And it's like, no, they don't like in If you have any notion
of like politics and history, don't sit here and tell me that
this country has fought a war since World War 2 that was in
the name of freedom and liberty and protecting my There hasn't
been one and there's been very few in American history.
So don't take take that nonsenseand stuff, shove it up your ass.

(31:41):
Like, I'm not about that, you know, But I think like, you
know, that was a project that, you know, happened under Reagan.
Like, I think to like, you know,like to engross the country more
into jingoism and nationalism isthis, you know, God bless the
military. And it's like, what?

(32:03):
We are kind of overcorrecting onthat one a little bit, yeah.
And I think, I mean, I guess thereason why we're bringing that
up, you know, I guess this earlyin the the show is to comment on
the fact that Uncle Sam like again, like I was saying, you,
you, you would expect this to bea movie, especially the direct
to video element, the you know, the, the short length, the
cheapness of it. You'd expect it to be a like

(32:25):
kind of a one off slasher around4th of July.
That would be, you know, revolving around teens on 4th of
July who are killed off by this madman wearing an Uncle Sam
outfit. And that's just completely not
what you get with Uncle Sam. The movie is a lot more serious,
I think then most people would expect it to be, especially the

(32:47):
first like 30 minutes of this movie.
You know, after you get that very ridiculous opening sequence
where the, the government, the army basically finds our, you
know, Uncle Sam character Sam Harper, who's been shot down in
a helicopter and they finally find his body and they're going

(33:08):
to basically bring him back home.
And he you. Think, let's say you think like
four years after his chopper wasshot down, they're going to find
his body. It's not again, I, I really find
that that whole opening sequenceto be like way ridiculous.
And, and I actually was like sitting, sitting there at during

(33:29):
the movie, like questioning, I'mlike, wait a second.
So you're telling me he's been just sat in that helicopter for
three years and they finally found his body?
And then he like, comes alive, shoots the people that find him
because they are talking about friendly fire.
And he's, you know, it, it was afriendly fire incident that he's
pissed about. And he kills everybody that

(33:49):
finds him and then like, goes back to being dead.
And then they bring his body home and he's still like, you
know. Dead.
Well, good news, Arizona Cardinals fans.
That means Pat Tillman can be brought back from the dead as a
resident because he was also killed by friendly fire.
It's just my. It's just weird to me.

(34:10):
It's like the whole opening sequence doesn't really make a
whole lot of sense because I thought at first like, oh,
they're finding his body in the past, right?
That would like. That was three years ago.
But why does the guy, the guy driving the Hummer, look like
fucking Saddam Hussein? Like with this, with this
fucking mustache, Like maybe that was the.
Thing they they called it in, somebody spotted it.

(34:30):
They were like. Wait a second.
There's Saddam. There's Saddam bomber and they
accidentally bombed Sam instead.Yeah.
I mean, the whole sequence doesn't really make a whole lot
of sense. I I don't.
And again, the movie does not really do a good job of setting
up like why Uncle Sam comes backfrom the dead, how he comes back

(34:51):
from the dead. There's no real genesis of the
zombie element to him or even really a motive at all like you
would think at first. You know, if Sam was killed in a
friendly fire incident, you'd think OK you.
Don't want to come back and like, like, you know, he's going
back to the base and he's going to kill everybody.

(35:13):
Yeah, exactly. He's, you know, and and that's
not what happens. He it it, he has really no
motive on who to kill. He just kind of is back in his
hometown and just starts killingpeople at the 4th of July event.
And it really doesn't have much of A plot to it to really cement
whatever theme they're going forbecause ultimately the first 30

(35:36):
minutes or so is really devoted to this whole idea.
And I actually, I didn't think it was that bad.
Actually. I thought it was pretty
interesting how they devote thisthis time to Jodie, who's, you
know, kind of been sowed some seeds of, you know, war stories
that kind of make him want to join the army as well from his
Uncle Sam. Just kind of basically, you

(35:57):
know, giving him a like a, a very short synopsis of his time
in the army that makes it sound really cool.
And so he's kind of obsessed with going into the Army.
And then his mom and his his aunt, who is married to Sam are
basically without telling him, they're basically saying like,

(36:18):
you know, your uncle wasn't really that great of a guy.
You know, not only was he, you know, he did he enlist in the
Army and go kill a bunch of people, but he is also kind of a
domestic abuser. And I kind of like that.
I like the opening moments of itbecause they thought that it was
a kind of a sobering look at soldiers in war, right?

(36:39):
Because you always think like, and you said it, you know, after
Vietnam, we kind of went the other way.
And we said, oh, you're a soldier.
Well, you know what? Let me pay for your breakfast
because you must be a good guy. You must be a hero.
And I think like this film kind of takes out that idea and and
throws it on its side and says, well, you know, yeah, he might
have fought for the country. He's actually kind of a shit

(37:01):
bag, you know? You know, and I like that.
I think that's that was an interesting intro to the movie
itself. So like, I wish that they had
kind of run to that a little bitmore.
At the same time, though, I do also think that that was maybe a
mistake because the movie is very, very serious.

(37:22):
It takes us out very, very seriously at the beginning.
And I think that might be something that most viewers are
not looking for from a movie like this.
And not only that, once you get into the movie a little bit
more, it starts to lose some of its seriousness and kind of goes
really schlocky. So I don't know, it feels like

(37:45):
it just doesn't know what to do with itself a lot.
It's a, it's a, it's a film. It's a movie of 2 halves and two
films. Yeah, the first half.
Is this like this little boy looks up to his uncle that he
didn't know and wants to be in in military and but there's a
deep secret. Nobody knows what's going on.

(38:06):
What's going on for the little boy.
Judy doesn't know, but he wants he wants everyone you know to
know about his Uncle Sam the hero 'cause he didn't life
lessons that he's learning alongthe way.
And then the other half is a totally wet fart of a slash.
The second-half is a totally uninteresting, boring,

(38:28):
nonsensical stupid slasher at the end.
Barely slasher because everything's just like and I go
cuts away so. Yeah, Yeah, it is.
It is like kind of it starts outstrong.
It has an interesting like slasher element to it, and then

(38:51):
it really fumbles the ending to where the conclusion is like,
that's it. Like it's like a wet fart of
like a conclusion of just like it seems like there should be so
much more to it. And then it just abruptly ends
and this is like over. That's it done.
And I think like some of the biggest issues that I have with

(39:11):
the movie is the fact that like,it does have these shining
moments. You know, I think Isaac Hayes is
actually pretty good here, even though he shows up and it's like
kind of a weird role for him. He shows up, does a pretty good
job. What'd you say?
I said money. Yeah, Money.
Yeah, He's he does a pretty goodjob.
I like like he's sort of like the dissenter of like I served

(39:32):
my time in the Army. Look at they got my leg blown
off. And he was in Korea and stepped
on a landmine. Like I, I like, I like those
moments. I think those moments are really
good. And then I think it kind of
loses itself. When it loses itself the most is
when it gets to the 4th of July event, which, as we we've kind

(39:53):
of mentioned before, is like, seriously over the top, right?
Like everything is decorated with red, white and blue.
There's flags everywhere. They, it's not only it's not
enough that they have like, justa guy in an Uncle Sam costume.
You got to have a fucking parade.
They got to have like a extreme fireworks show.
They've got like dunking booths with a woman in a, you know,

(40:13):
bikini. Yeah, American flag bikini.
They've got like. Listen, the most important thing
there when they the one advert in this film country time
Lemonade there yes, it is. Is that even?
Is country time even still a thing or is that a?
Thing, but I did find that funnyas well.

(40:35):
Like sitting. There like in the 90s,
especially when a Snapple is so big with the Snapple lady and
stuff, this film dares to be bold and go to the country.
That is true, and it's like a prolonged shot too.
Yeah, I know. Like like it's like a hurling
cut the fucking the rims, like with the cleaver.
And again, what a time, guys, let's look back on the 90s and

(40:59):
the parenting style here for what a time to be a lot 12 years
old. You're old enough to take that
cleaver and you know, just slashthe meat.
You woke up in the middle of thenight and you stepped on broken
glass. You'll be fine.
Go back to bed. I like.
That too, like the mom is just like, it's all right.
And then in the morning, she's like, you clean up that broken.
Glass I know like, like I was going to say like it's like, all

(41:21):
right, honey, I want to go back to sleep and as the kids walking
off like get the fucking make sure you get a fucking, you
know, dust pan and pick that up like, you know.
Like that too. Yeah, she was very, she is very
nonchalant about the whole, like, basically.
And yeah, you had like a whole piece of huge glass stuck in his
foot. She's just all right.

(41:41):
I'll get a Band-Aid. Just a sign of the times, like,
you know, back then, back then, you're like, hey, you know, you
stepped on glass, you'll be fine.
Just take some robot tested. Now it's like, go to the ER.
My little baby's dead. The sack race through like a
minefield. Oh.
My God, the sack race is. Hilarious.
So like so much rusty objects around and I never.

(42:02):
Realized, I guess I haven't beeninto the right 4th of July
celebrations, but I never realized that sack races were so
high stakes that you had to likebe cheating through your sack
race, knocking people over to win the sack race.
I had realized that it was like that big of a deal for for most
people that you have to win thatlike what is the, what is the

(42:25):
prize? What for?
To win the sacrifice like. George Washington comes down
from the heavens and. They've got Abe Lincoln.
They got a guy dressed as Abe Lincoln.
Then she liked that too. You like the the the boyfriend
of Jodie's mom who's like they really make it a point to make
him a big shit bag of like how is an attorney cheating the

(42:49):
people out of there? Yes, I won the my case.
Feel like there's advertisers I guess.
I won my case over tax shelters and I won because the IRS is
fucking stupid. So you're not paying your taxes
or you're cheating. I'm just smarter than them.
Jodie yeah, I love that because like, again, I think that kind

(43:11):
of goes back to what you're saying about, you know, I got
to, you know, give my cut to Uncle Sam and the fact that,
like, they're cheating on their taxes and, you know, basically
not having because I think he said he says something specific.
He says like, you know, most people don't like to pay taxes,
found a legal way around it. So you know, it's funny.

(43:33):
Before you know it, you're paying 50%.
And I did, I mean, I like that part of it too.
But then I think some of the other things that are really
over the top, like because some of those, you know, obviously
all of these things are very over the top in like kind of
tongue in cheek in the way that they're presented.
And you're obviously not supposed to like these people.
I don't know, it's like extremely explicit.

(43:54):
I don't know, you know, there's nothing.
If you watch this movie, you're not really going to.
It's not like you could miss these things.
They're they're very in your face.
But the one thing that's super over the top is when, you know,
PJ Soul's character, who's in this movie and her her husband,
they wheel out their son. It is such a it's such a like,

(44:15):
it's such a ridiculous entrance for the kid where they wheel him
out and he's like fucking, It's almost like a parody of a blind
kid coming because he's blind. He's.
Fucking hell is killer. Yeah, he's, he's got his.
They are such a fan. They like, like where?
Why didn't they show the firework incident that burned,

(44:36):
you know? Yeah.
Burned him doing the kids to thecrisp and they're like, oh,
we're ready for our fireworks display.
We have the firefighter set up so we don't have a repeat of
last year's. And then I know.
And then the dad taps him on theshoulder, like in case you

(44:58):
forgot, little buddy, he's talking about you.
Everybody's staring at you. Don't worry, I know.
It's wow. It is not.
It's it, you know, it's that. Subplot totally stupid.
Needs to go. Like, it's like, it serves no
purpose. Like it's like, just like,
that's the thing. Like like a poltergeist, like,

(45:21):
come to me. I, you know, Sam, I can sort.
Of thing, that's the thing like that I again about this movie,
like the first part of it very serious, like take yourself very
seriously. Second part, like how can you
possibly take that that moment seriously when they wheeled the
kid out? Looks like fucking Roy.
Yeah, that's the thing. It's like, it's like so over

(45:44):
that it becomes offensive in theway that that's just presented.
Like they needed to get this handicapped child in so that you
would feel even worse about celebrating the 4th of July.
I don't know. I don't know.
I just I've that's it's horriblyhilarious the way that that
plays out. I don't think it was meant to be
as funny as it ends up being. Like I don't, I don't think that

(46:07):
was the intention. I don't know.
I feel, I feel. Like, it does end up being
ridiculously funny. And we don't know what I say.
We don't know about that becausein New York you can't get
fireworks, so. And you can get.
Every, every, I would say every 4th of July, they set up those
big fucking, you know, tense, like, oh, get fireworks here.

(46:28):
And it's they're just like snakes and sparkle.
That's why, because if you've ever seen Dutch, then you know
how dangerous the fireworks can be.
That whole fireworks scene in Dutch I.
I thought you were going to say Joe Dirt.
Yeah, well, that's you. But you know, I always reference
Dutch. You should be referencing Joe
Dirt and stuff. We haven't even talked about the

(46:51):
fact like because we talked about the annoying lawyer guy.
How about Congressman Cummings, played by Robert Forrester?
Just showed up randomly on set. Yeah, just just walking by and
they're like, hey, you busy? And he's like, no, I'm Robert
Forrester, fame character actor.He doesn't even look like him

(47:13):
really. Just as like a shit bag
congressman. And they're like, you know,
again, very on the nose of like,you have 14 people, you know,
like unpaid, like, I mean paid, but not supposed to be on your
payroll. That yeah, that's the other
thing that the film has to do, like because you, you don't even
know who this guy is. He just shows up the 4th of July

(47:34):
event. And so they have to have
characters and like back acts like extras basically.
To backtrack and pad it out withone thing that's also stupid to
like, yeah, he's a scumbag and like he's corrupt, but like,
maybe somehow tied to war. Like, you know, he was a
congressman that was like at theGulf of Tonkin.

(47:56):
That's cool. Let's let's go do it, you know,
or something to like all tied together, you know, it's.
Yeah. But I think I think you're
getting to the point there that the film definitely makes a lot
of these people various different elements of people,
right? Like the lawyer, the
congressman, the Sergeant that comes in.

(48:16):
He's basically like, yeah, I aimto get some of that, you know,
when he's talking about Sam's wife and his.
Oh, you mean Gary Busey? Yeah, and then like the the cop
too, who's basically like, man, I wish, I wish she would have
sex right now. And she's like, you're on duty.
Dude, that cop. Dude, the cop that Paul Rudd was

(48:39):
born for that role. Yeah, they should have just.
That guy looks a lot. 1996 that was prime Paul.
Ryan, I know, I know. It's like.
Why didn't they cast him? Yeah.
No, but I like his. His Sierra Nevada attacks would
have been, oh, put the film over, but.
The film goes out of its way to show like all these people

(49:01):
being, you know, very over the top ridiculous.
I think the biggest the biggest thing I have a problem with with
the over top distance. Why are there two lady
protagonists that look the fucking same?
They do they. Really do.
Why do we need? Why do we need to have Jodi?
I mean Jodi, Sally Baker and Louise Harper literally dress

(49:23):
and have the same hairstyle, same height and everything.
Like what the hell? Is that a is that a reference to
the fact that Sam was molesting his sister?
Because she does talk about that.
Yes. He's been doing that to me since
I was six years old. And then they look at the same.
So like, you know, the molestation probably, probably
maybe meant to be similar like that.

(49:45):
But yeah, you're right. They are very, very similar
looking. And not only that, they also
look very similar to PJ Souls, who, you know, the mom of that
kid who got blown up by fireworks.
So they, they all look very similar.
And yeah, it does make for a kind of a confusing.
And not only that, too, the filmis really not consistent in the
way that it makes them look sometimes.
I don't know if you noticed that, but like something.

(50:06):
Yeah, no, like, like. By the end of the film, Sally
looks like she's like 70 years old, like the way like they just
have like her makeup and stuff for her face.
It's like when she's like I was,she doesn't say that, but she
was just like my brother made mylife a living.
Health is the queen stuff for me.
And I didn't know what to do is like, did you go from being like

(50:30):
30 to like 72? Like what's going on there?
Yeah. And what was great too, is that
she was like the happiest day ofmy life is when she he went with
Louise. And so I knew I wouldn't be a
victim anymore. She, you know, someone else
would like the face Louise makesis great.
Like bitch, like he could have like and like, it's like a lot

(50:54):
of fertile ground there that could have covered by the, you
know. So do you think the film was
better off having that like ridiculous Uncle Sam plastic
mask get up or do you think theyshould have stuck with the
zombie look of Sam like the burned up?
Zombie, I think, I mean I think it's stupid irregardless, so I

(51:16):
think the both of them they don't, I don't think either one
works like the the I I do I I dofind it funny him like kind of,
you know, dithering about and the Uncle Sam costume.
I think the funniest thing is when he bumps into Isaac Hay's
and Isaac Hay's like that guy's a little strange.
It's like the guy has fucking cat eyes, you know, through the

(51:39):
through the plastic mask and like you could see his burned up
skin and like yellow cat eyes. It's like that guy is not just
look a little strange, he's likefucking he.
Got the extra, he got the he gotthe extra spicy down at Popeyes.
Yeah, exactly. It's like.
He's like, oh, I know it. I know they'll yeah, I know.

(52:03):
Somebody got the somebody got the black and.
That's why that's why he wasn't concerned when he got bumped
into. He's like, oh, he's heading to
the bathroom quick. Man's on a mission.
May that Porta porta Π be virginal.
One thing I'd like to mention, 4th of July, fair and parade and

(52:24):
all that. That band that was playing.
Missed opportunity to have Paul Revere and the Raiders there.
Yeah, yeah, I'm sure I'm you know who Paul Revere and the
Raiders are. Not really.
Oh, look them up. The 60s band, they had a lot of
hits. They dressed up.
The gimmick was they and they also dressed up in like, you

(52:45):
know, colonial clothes and stuff.
Gotcha. OK.
They had a nice 60's pop song called Kicks that was about not
doing drugs. It's got a great tall string
guitar riff. Yeah, then that would have been
right at home at this 4th of July event and and and.
They were they excuse me, they beat like the monkeys by two

(53:08):
months by releasing I'm Not YourStepping Stone, which their
version of I'm Not Your SteppingStone.
Great song all. Right, good to know.
Good to know. It's a very it's a weird
gimmick, but. Well, because one of the guys in
the band named Paul O'reer. Oh, OK.
OK. So they went with that.
Got you. You ever hear the song like
Cherokee Pete? Like Indian Reservation chair
key Pete poop? But that was them too, so.

(53:32):
Yeah, that's you're right. I mean, it's missed opportunity.
They should have at least playedit.
I. Think I mean like like like $5
and they would have been there so.
Right, exactly. But yeah, I mean, like, the
whole thing is weird. The one thing I was really
giving out about is the school part.

(53:53):
Them being in school. Yeah, why am I giving out about
that? July 2nd, These fucks are still
in school. There's no school in America.
That is true. I.
Didn't even think about that, tobe honest with you.
Yeah, July. It's like July 2nd every.
Single kid in summer school. Pull up, pull out your, you

(54:14):
know, your math books, kids. We're going to do some
equations. It's like, what are you fucking
talking about? Like.
That is true. I didn't even, you know, I
didn't even register it to me, but you're.
Right, that took me right this. Movie where they are because
they normally you know. When you there isn't there like
somewhere in New York is like the one guy was like the

(54:35):
Sergeant when he was like I got to go.
He's just said he's going like up to Binghamton.
I don't, they don't, they don't say where it is, but the one guy
say he's going to Bingham then. So I was like, well.
They meant they mention, they mention where it is, right?
It's. Twin.
They call it Twin Rivers Twin. Rivers.
I don't know where the fuck thatis.
They just say Twin Rivers, USA. Yeah, it's like, it could be

(54:56):
like Twin Peaks, but like David Lynch.
Maybe it's maybe it's New Jersey, Twin Rivers, New Jersey,
I don't know. Yeah.
But anyway, July, yeah, no, no kids in school in July.
You're right. I didn't even catch that.
But yeah, that is that is no wonder the teacher was so

(55:16):
annoyed. It's like, what the fuck are we
still doing here? We had we had 57.
I got this kid. I I got, I got this kid calling
me a fucking commie because I wouldn't go to Vietnam.
What am I fucking doing with my life?
And that teacher looks incredibly young, too, for

(55:37):
somebody who is a guy taught your Uncle Sam, too.
And it's like, dude, you look like you're 42.
Like, what are you talking about?
How? Could you?
How could you possibly have taught him you're not?
I mean, it was a 60s man. Hey, you old.
How old are you? 19, You're old enough to teach
you. You just got out of school.
You know things right now. How about the the whole flag

(55:59):
burning incident that actually raises Uncle Sam from the dead?
I don't like like again, this film is really not clear about
how Uncle Sam comes back from the dead.
What like raises him like? Sometimes I don't.
Look like I don't even think they're interested.
Yeah, like it doesn't. It doesn't go into it.
It's like sometimes it makes it look like when Jodie bleeds on

(56:20):
the the picture that kind of like infuses Uncle Sam with
life. But then he doesn't really come
back from the dead until later when the kids are in the
cemetery and they're like flinging around of American flag
on fire for some reason. Like I didn't realize back in
the 90s that's what kids did either.
They just went to the cemetery and just like burned flags and
graffiti things for some reason.That's that.

(56:43):
You know what? We like to talk a lot of shit
about phones. Kids are kids are always on
their phones these days. Well, mate, you know what?
At least they they're not graffitiing gravestones and
flinging burning flags. Around by the way also too one
another thing like it's July. These kids are at night wearing

(57:04):
like their fucking slickers out there.
Why, why 2 rolling fog like likehow cold is it outside?
Like like for that fog was she to be ripping and roaring like
how cold and you like you humid is out there for like, you know,

(57:24):
Rolling Thunder you're thinking.Way too much about it they.
At the cemetery. The only thing that that they
were thinking about in this was like atmosphere.
Like what would be a good atmosphere in a graveyard?
Fog. OK, well, do it.
I don't, you know, climate conditions.
Who who, who knows about that? Shit, why?
Why why not just do it in like Arlington Cemetery?

(57:47):
Like like have the ghost of Robert E Lee come out, you know,
Uncle Sam put a boot up his ass.So you know Grant or Sherman?
How about Uncle Sam on stilts? We like that sequence of like
the absolutely outrageous guy who's like, yeah, you know what
I'm going to do? I'm going to be a peeping Tom.

(58:08):
No one will notice. I can't I know you know what it
was. It was it was worth it.
All he was missing was to whip his Dick out and start baiting
in front because he was like literally like on the window
sill like a trouble that I I like that like breathing on the
window. And when the tits and ass
finally come out, she's like youpeeping Tom.

(58:31):
Like I just love it. I was just like this small town
community. And he whips out the stilts, 15
feet tall, walking around the village.
You know what I'm not doing? I'm not.
I wouldn't. No, fuck that.
I don't need to break my neck, you know?
And then you know what? Porn wasn't as readily available
and it won't be, so maybe you know with the for another.

(58:52):
Year until until the Internet takes off that's.
Right, So you know what, maybe you'll be doing that in the
future too, when they start implementing all the driver's
license banning and verifications and things like
that. Did you mention we're patriotic
on here? I just thought, I think that's
so fucking funny though, that about the the whole thing with

(59:15):
stilts and that they this movie's like they were like, you
know, the budgets, you know, pretty small.
But you know what we can do? We can hire like a circus
performer on stilts to do this one, this one ridiculous
sequence of running through the village on stilts.
What do you mean Clarissa explains it all that much?
Better. That's true.
That's true. It's it's, it's showing up on,

(59:35):
you know, the ladder. Hey, Sampling.
Come on in. OK, let me just take those
stilts off. Yeah, Hey, you got those tickets
to Pearl Jam? That would have been a very
different course. That explains it all.
Where Sam comes in, he's like, yeah, I got to wear stilts
because you know what? They say vines are really bad

(59:56):
for your house. They let rats and ants come in.
So you know what? We had to cut your vines down.
I had to get some stilts instead.
You. Know what a time to be alive of
them, like actually saying like,you know, Pearl Jam and stuff.
Now if it was modern day Nickelodeon, they make up some
shitty Dan Schneider esque band.Like, you know, the feed maker,
too. Like, you know, yeah, Marissa

(01:00:19):
Cosgrove's Miranda Cosgrove's going to see the feed Lakers.
Yeah. And and I guess we haven't
really talked too much about thekills in this movie.
What do you what do you think? About the kills, they're
terrible. They're little, so bland and
boring and like half of them wasprobably checked out on because
it was like what, like what? And I won't wait, take a piss

(01:00:40):
or. Something like.
Come back and like, oh, somebodygot something happened, like a
couple. Of them happened off screen like
Abe Lincoln when he gets shot inthe head.
I mean, that's off screen. So you just it's just a reveal.
Yeah, I think that's part of theproblem.
This is a slasher movie without much slashing.
And then not only that, but the end of the movie is so, so RIP.

(01:01:03):
Like it just rips right through any conclusion.
It's not like if you remember Jack Frost, Jack Frost has a way
too long ending of like Jack Frost dying and then you know,
no, no, no, he comes back and then.
I listen, it's been like 6 years, I fortunately don't
remember. Yeah, well that one has a 2.

(01:01:24):
I just remember Shannon Elizabeth in it and Michael
Keaton being killed and coming back and rocking out.
Oh yeah, that one has a 2 long ending.
This one has what, like such an abrupt ending that you're like,
wait, what just happened? So the only thing that happens

(01:01:45):
is really like Isaac. They like try to shoot him,
right? Doesn't work.
So Isaac is like, I got a great idea.
There's a fucking historical cannon sitting in the middle of
town. I got a got a 12 inch cannon
ready. Let me go and grab that.
At least I've got a nice, you know, I've got a, you know,

(01:02:07):
hitch on my truck so I can go. I can go pull it and I'm going
to grab this historical cannon and we're going to blow up Uncle
Sam with the cannon. Which is funny because I you
know what cannon balls don't do.Blow up?
Yeah, they just blast you through.
So yeah, it's not. Like it's, you know?
I didn't realize that the house was full of propane.

(01:02:29):
Open propane tanks. It's like.
Movie takes place in the Death Wish timeline.
Yeah, yeah, it's because. I somebody looked at the
somebody looked at the vanity lamp in the bathroom.
They just went boom. Yeah, because they they shoot
the cannon off into Uncle Sam. He explodes, the house explodes,

(01:02:51):
everything fucking explodes. And that's it.
That's like the that's the end. And it's.
No, no, the end is he's burning his toys and stuff.
And then he gives a smirk. Like there's an outro like he's
corrupt. Yeah.
So again, that kind of comes back to the theme of this movie.
So Uncle Sam itself doesn't really make sense as a
character. He has no motivation.

(01:03:12):
You would you would think that the movie kind of trying to be
like, you know, anti war, what kind of have like some sort of
theme centered around Uncle Sam coming back to kill everybody
that was involved in the friendly fire incident, right,
because that would make the mostsense for his revenge.
But that doesn't happen. He just kills random people.
He just kills a random woman who?

(01:03:34):
A random girl who happened to have a joint who?
I was just so confiscated. It's like just about to say, I
was just about to say that the poor girl that was, you know, 12
year old sitting there manning the rib station with a cleaver
went out to have a smoke and. It's like, you know, really,
she's already had a bad enough day and you got to grill her

(01:03:55):
too. And then, but not only that,
it's like he just kills a bunch of random people at this 4th of
July ceremony. So there's really no commentary
that's that you get from the themurders.
It's just kind of like random shit happenstance.
Yeah. And then so the film tries,
tries to like kind of play that off.
And then I guess what it's trying to do is show like Jodie,

(01:04:18):
oh, you know what? Maybe I don't really want to be
like my Uncle Sam. But then at the end, it kind of
has like this mischievous grin on Jodie's face as he's burning
all of his army toys where it's like, is he evil now?
Like, I don't understand. I don't understand what it's
trying to say because it does that like weird slow MO grin

(01:04:40):
that would, you know, in most sequences would indicate Oh no,
he's been corrupted or he's beenpossessed by the the demon that
was possessing an Uncle Sam previously.
I don't know. I don't understand it.
I don't know what they're tryingto say there.
I thought I missed something. I actually I literally re round
to see what I missed cuz I was like, well, isn't he burning his

(01:05:03):
like army toys? Like is, isn't that a good sign
that he's like against going into the army now?
And his mom's kind of sitting there like a Mentos commercial,
like, Oh yeah, that's right, that's right.
Burn your burn your army. Shit.
I didn't want you going in thereanyway.
But then like it gives that mischievous credit and you're
kind of thinking like, well, what are you, what are you

(01:05:24):
saying about what he's doing? Like I, I don't know, I don't
get it. I don't, I think that it's
really a modelled. I don't, I don't think there's
anything to get really. I think it's just really
modelled and I think it's clear it's pretty anti war, anti, you
know, American capitalist society sort of thing.
But at the same time, I don't really think it comes together

(01:05:46):
very well. And I don't think that they did
a good job with cementing the fact of like, why Uncle Sam is
back, why he's a zombie, why he's killing the random people
in town. Just a giant wet fart.
Yeah, it's like. Yeah, I think, you know, I would
be, I would be OK with this movie if it just had at least a

(01:06:07):
little bit more to it that wouldjust come together.
Because they do think like the ending to, of, of how Uncle Sam
is killed off is just so out of like out of thin air just like
happens. And like if you it's like
blinking, you miss it. It's I think it's literally like
30 seconds. Get the cannon, bring it back to

(01:06:28):
the house, shoot it off Uncle Sam's gone done.
And it just leaves a lot to be desired for me.
I don't know. I do know you're right.
You know what one thing I got tosay, a lot of barbecuing in this

(01:06:50):
movie, Even a nice Wicker Man homage when Robert Forrester,
you know, is made into an effigy.
He didn't show any of the sides at this.
Point you wanted to know what they were.
I want I I I wanted to see the coleslaw, the pasta sale, the
Mac sale, the potato sale. I wanted to see it all you know

(01:07:13):
the one things that white peopleand during the 4th of July
thrive on is the abundance of salads.
Sure. Ham salad?
Chicken salad. Which?
Again, is sort of a is, you know, playing the odds because
you have it outside on like an 80° day.
You're, you're, you're messing with mayonnaise and you're like,

(01:07:34):
you're like, I'll take the chance, you know?
The only, the only, the only item there that doesn't isn't
going to be, you know, hurt. There's the pasta salad, because
it's olive and oil. You know, oil and vinegar,
whatever the hell. But it is, I don't know where
that tradition came from of like, you know what, what is it,
8090° outside? Everybody's outside having fun.

(01:07:54):
You know, you're probably not going to be eating for a couple
hours. Just make mayonnaise salads.
Listen. Coleslaw.
Delightful. Mac salad?
Amazing. The other thing too, that
doesn't make salad about salads.Like that 4th of July, hot
outside, probably being active, sweaty.

(01:08:17):
Who wants to be loaded down witha salad?
Like but not only that though too.
You can have a nice German potato salad which doesn't have
mayonnaise. It's.
German salad is is delightful. Love, love it too.
But I mean, again, sorry, No, no, you go ahead.
You go ahead. I was actually, I was just going
to ask, how did you feel about the ribs cooked to perfection?

(01:08:39):
I'm also not a big rib guy. I think it's I think ribs are
completely overrated. It's like it's like prime rib,
more fat than the meat. So I think there's other thing I
would much rather have a burger and hot dogs than rib.
OK, OK. Am I saying they're going to be
bad? No, but I mean they looked like

(01:09:02):
they were smoked for for foreverthough Yeah, they.
Looked a little bit overdone to me.
Little ashy, don't know, didn't see any BBQ sauce.
Seeing as it's 1995, I can smellthe Craft Master Casey
masterpiece from here. But because that's all you had,
you didn't have like, stubs and,you know, all that stuff, you

(01:09:24):
just dinosaur. It just said that, K, you know,
KC masterpiece. But I would much rather have a
burger and hot dog over ribs. Yeah, but I nothing against
them. Not like that.
I won't ever, you know, be like,I won't eat that.
And that's atrocious. But you know, but how fancy of a

(01:09:45):
place like you're having ribs. Like people can get ribs.
That's like, that's a lot of work.
You're going to smoke that many ribs for the.
Whole community not only there though too like no BBQ chicken
like I feel I feel like especially during the 4th of
July in the 90s because again, and I think we talked about this
before I talked about to somebody recently like like BBQ

(01:10:09):
chickens kind of fallen way out of style.
He's up here in rural New York. You know it that was a staple
food of the 90s of like, you know, you would get burgers, hot
dogs and BBQ chicken before you'd get like Italian sausage
and patties and all that, you know, and brats and stuff.
So like I feel. Like, you know, that that meant

(01:10:32):
we're missing out there. Sure, bud.
Anything else to add about the movie for a move on to our
rating? I just wanted to see the
coleslaw. You know this.
Is just too much to ask. All right, so from a score of 0
out of 10, firework addled children, disabled children,

(01:11:00):
always, always watch for those fireworks.
You don't want to be one of those people that are in the the
newest because you blew off yourhand or you put it on your head
and killed yourself. Be careful with fireworks.
Now I have to give the movie a good rating because you get.
Yeah, because it's so I'm not handicapped, so I'm not, you

(01:11:22):
know. Yeah, against the handicap, I'll
give it a four out of 10. It's a credible wet part of a
film. It's really boring.
It's. I.
It's an. Hour and 20 like 3 minutes long.
I was like well thank God this will be a nice fun watch.
Nope, you feel every fucking minute of this film.

(01:11:43):
There's some good ideas, but it's completely muddled.
There's no nuance to what you know the story.
There's no nuance to the message.
Uncle Sam himself, horrible slasher villain.
None of the kills matter. None of them feel like visceral.

(01:12:07):
It's all just a bunch of gobbledygook to fill up time and
to get VHSS out of a blockbusteror Hollywood video.
This is like, I'm so sad that this is like such a wet fart.
And it really is. There's like, I did not enjoy
this film at all. And in fact, there are times

(01:12:28):
where I was thinking about putting on 1 1/2 speed.
They'd rather play Red Dead Redemption 2 instead of, you
know, watch this. I mean, performance wise,
nobody's like bad. Nobody gets bad performance.
Is it a incompetently made film?No.
It's got the budget of you know,of the time direct video.
It's just a complete nonsensicalmesh of anti war, anti jingoism

(01:12:56):
with Sam coming back from Kuwaitfor no fucking reason at all
because he's a rapist. There's no connection and
engagement of fun going on here for me.
So 4 out of 10, I would not recommend this film at all to
like anybody. And not even people that are

(01:13:19):
like hardcore slasher like fans.I would say like this would be
like one of the last things I would be a hey, by the way, have
you seen this? So yeah, 4 out of 10.
Four disabled children out of 10.
Yeah, I would give this 5 out of10.
I think you know it. It's OK.
I think like it's, it's fair enough, but I didn't really have

(01:13:42):
that much fun with it. I think, you know, it could have
been a lot more fun. I think the part of the problem
is that it really does take itself pretty seriously for the
most part. And then, you know, here and
there it kind of has periods of over the top parody.
I feel like it probably should have just run with parody a
little bit more than trying to take itself so seriously.
And I, it probably would have been a little bit more
successful because you know, if it was constantly over the top

(01:14:05):
and kind of being outrageous in its style and kills and
everything like that, then it probably would have been a more
fun movie to watch. But I think because it kind of
toes the line between the two and doesn't really know where it
wants to sit, that's where it becomes more problematic.
And I, I think it really has issues with its with its pacing,

(01:14:28):
with its themes, with the tone that it presents throughout most
of the movie and kind of feels almost like it's two different
movies that are kind of pushed together into one.
The slasher elements pretty non existent.
And again, this does leave me feeling very similar to
something like Jack Frost where,you know, I could see how some
people might have a nostalgic appeal to it because they might

(01:14:52):
have seen it once before and they thought it was, you know,
really funny or they they might have just, you know, experienced
it previously in their life and,and, and it kind of just reminds
them of a different time. I could see that with Uncle Sam,
But I also think that it's just not really that good of a movie
overall. And probably, you know, if you
don't have any like connection to it from that period of time

(01:15:14):
besides, like for me it's the lenticular VHS cover.
But otherwise I'd had never seenthe movie, then I probably
wouldn't recommend anybody watching it for just to see, you
know, what it's about because I don't think it's really that
good of a movie overall. You know, it's pretty
lackluster. The only thing is that it does
have that theme of 4th of July. So if that's something that you

(01:15:34):
really want to get in there, youknow you need something to watch
for the 4th of July. You watch Patriot?
Yeah. Watch the.
Patriot this has it and has the 4th of July in it, but other
than that, really no, not a recommendation for me.
So. Also, I guess we didn't talk
about it at the beginning of theshow, but we had said we were

(01:15:57):
going to do a jello, and of course Uncle Sam is not as
jello. Unless you know this American.
It could be. It could be.
Made by Italians, but. Well, what the hell is that
whole like at the end I was going to ask you for Lucio like
or. Lucio, I don't know.
Is that like? Ulji, or.
Yeah, I was just about to say that like it's like, like it's

(01:16:19):
for for Dario this you know whathe.
Did die in 1996, so it probably was for Lucio Foji.
So there, there you go. Did they have did they have any
like working relationship or anything?
Probably. I mean, I'm sure he just, you
know, Bill Lustig especially was, you know, pretty, pretty
involved in the horror scene. So I'm sure he had some working

(01:16:42):
relationship with Foji at some point.
So I think like, that's, you know, that's got to be it.
Just dedicated to him. So, yeah, so there's a little
connection to Jallow, but again,we we kind of switched things up
because we were like, yeah, 4th of July is coming up.
You know, we'll we'll do that for for this episode.
But the intention was to do strip nude for your killer,

(01:17:07):
which again, just has a very evocative Jallow title.
So I still plan to do that. Let's do it next time.
Yeah, we'll do it next time. So so apologize if you.
Were unless you I do I spit on your grief.
Nah, let's do let's let's do strip nude for your killer, I

(01:17:27):
think, and go from there. But yeah, sorry if you were
expecting these yellow this time, but it was just it just
was too good because our episodewas going to release on 4th of
July, so we had to get that in. So yeah.
So I hope you enjoyed our episode on Uncle Sam.
I hope you have a good 4th of July if you're listening on 4th

(01:17:48):
of July. Thanks everybody.
Thanks for listening and. I have one more 4th of July
question. For me, sure, yeah.
Sausage links. Patties.
I'm always a link guy. OK.
Always a link guy. I like the links.
I like being able to put like onions and Peppers on top of

(01:18:08):
your link. Well, you can do that with the
patties too. Well, you can.
I don't know, I'm just always a link guy.
Are you a spicy or sweet? Guy, Oh, I'm always a spicy,
definitely a spicy link guy. I will eat sweet, but I will
like I have a much bigger affinity for spicy for sure.

(01:18:31):
But I think at a 4th of July event, you're probably safe with
getting both. I think it would be, you know,
you kind of want to mix and match.
Some people like sweet, some people like spicy.
So you want to have both available for your guests in the
event that they want one or the other.
I agree. I love both.
I mean, I love sweet and spicy. I love the spicy sausage more.

(01:18:53):
I do prefer Patty over link because again, yeah, you can
have hot dog, a thyme or, you know, brat.
I know it's not the same as a Italian sausage, you know, Link.
But with that thinking instead, it's like, you know what that
comes in Patty form. I think Patty and a nice and a
nice potato bun. Yeah, and with the Peppers and

(01:19:13):
audience and your mustard. Delightful.
I think Patty is easier to make with the links.
Sometimes you to effectively, especially if you're grilling,
to effectively grilling grill them, you kind of need to
parboil them first because they take a really, they can take a
really long time on the grill toget that maybe where you don't

(01:19:34):
want to charred. I would say they even take a
long time because I've been, I make patties in the pan.
I that's why I had last night for dinner and I couldn't be
having for the next two days even like if you put on medium
heat, it takes like 15 minutes because you're saying they're
constantly flipping it and then like, is the inside of that baby
160? Yet I think, I think links take

(01:19:57):
a little bit longer. So like for another for for 1/4
of July event you're trying to like get food out there fast
patties might be the way to go. Because they won't take as long,
but you know, can't go wrong with either sausage.
And last and last but not least,before we roll off this, what's
the brand hot dog you're going with?

(01:20:18):
I like a beef hot dog and I likeI generally like the are.
You a skin on or skin off guy? Do you like to snap or do you
not like to snap? You know, I'm OK with both.
I think I slightly prefer skin off.

(01:20:42):
That's my opinion, but that's also because I have generally
grown up with skin off So but you know, circumcised, I'm
circumcised. I'm OK with either one of those
hot dogs. I'll eat them both and then my,
I think my style of choice is the ballpark selects or whatever

(01:21:08):
they call those the special. They're like the the, the nicer
version of the ballpark Franks. Those are real tasty.
It's like the black labels of like.
Sure, Yeah, whatever. Yeah, those ones are are quite
good. They do give me ridiculously
stinky farts, but those those ones are are probably my

(01:21:31):
favorite type for sure. I think you're you're, are you a
white the White Eagle guy I. Am a White Eagle man.
I think they're just OK. I don't know they.
Weren't which which were for those who are not in upstate New
York, they're based right out ofSchenectady.
So which is, you know, across Turbo Troy full circle here.

(01:21:54):
Delightful hot dogs. I don't get them that often
though, because again, they are pricey for what they are, but
they are really good. I am definitely a snap guy like
I would, right? I want that skin.
I want that casing on there to give it a nice bite and crisp.
Kayums are good. I love like, you know, the Kaya

(01:22:14):
old Kayum Hebrew ones, You know,some ballparks are good too.
Just stay away from bar rest. That packaging is loose and it's
dog food and it has like, hot dog juice in there.
Nasty. But yeah, no.
And I would say I'm a Hoffman's guy, which is, I think they're
based on Syracuse, Hoffman's over Nathan's.

(01:22:37):
Still haven't tried to say Sabret though.
So. Yeah, I mean, any, any hot dog
I'm cool with. But yeah, I think I, I don't
know, I'll have to try the WhiteEagles again because I, I wasn't
a huge fan, but I'll give them another go.
I don't know. I'm glad to hear that.
Write in. Let us know what your favorite.

(01:22:57):
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you know, there's, there's a
lot of thought to be put behind.It's true.
And again, if you're if you're listening and you're from the
Upstate New York region, if you get white Eagles in your area,
get them delightful support local businesses, there you go.
If not, then just stay away fromBar S.

(01:23:19):
All right, well, thanks for listening to our episode on
Uncle Sam. Hope you enjoyed it.
Hope you have a nice 4th of Julyand the the weekend that
follows. You should subscribe to us on
pretty much any app that you canthink of.
We're on Spotify, Apple podcast,whatever you use, we're on it.
Subscribe, leave us a nice review.
We're on Facebook and Blue sky. You can find us on there.

(01:23:41):
Just search 1 Micron podcast. We are also on Patreon where you
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towards beer. So we appreciate that in
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where you can write. Let us know what you like, what

(01:24:03):
you don't like, what movies you want us to watch, and we will
take that into consideration. Thanks for listening again.
I hope to see you back next timefor hopefully as you all episode
next time. That's the goal.
And until then? Take care.
And by the way, for that next episode after that, we're right

(01:24:25):
into Red Hot Action Month. We haven't decided the decade or
films yet, so if you have suggestions, pitch them along
because we're getting into the busy season of the podcast with
our summer action blockbusters and Halloween and Christmas.
So the feedback is great. But until then, keep that in
mind and take care.