September 26, 2025 • 24 mins
Archie tries to talk Duffy into selling Bing Crosby half interest in the Tavern. But even if he can convince Duffy to sell, he has to convince Bing to buy.
Originally aired on December 7, 1943. This is episode 107 of Duffy's Tavern.
Please email questions and comments to host@classiccomedyotr.com.
Like us on Facebook at facebook.com/classiccomedyotr. Please share this podcast with your friends and family.
You can also subscribe to our podcast on Spreaker.com, Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, and Google podcasts.
This show is supported by Spreaker Prime.
Originally aired on December 7, 1943. This is episode 107 of Duffy's Tavern.
Please email questions and comments to host@classiccomedyotr.com.
Like us on Facebook at facebook.com/classiccomedyotr. Please share this podcast with your friends and family.
You can also subscribe to our podcast on Spreaker.com, Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, and Google podcasts.
This show is supported by Spreaker Prime.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Welcome to classic comedy of old time radio. I'm your host,
ron Eickelbarger. Archie tries to talk Duffy into selling Bing
Crosby a half interest in the tavern. But even if
Archie can convince Duffy to sell, he still has to
convince Bing to buy. This is episode number one hundred
(00:37):
and seven of Duffy's Tavern, entitled Guest Bing Crosbie. It
originally aired on December seventh, nineteen forty three.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Brisdol Myers, the makers of Salhapatika, Famous Laxaviv and Minute
Rubbs Modern chest rub brings you, Duffy.
Speaker 3 (01:11):
Hello, Duffy's where you eat me? Did an't you to
manage speaking? Duffy ain't here? Hello Duffy.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Uh, Well tonight, Duffy, we really got a big shop.
Bing Crosby Crosbie, she r c r osb.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
You know that guy Duffy, the straight man and the
Bob Hope Pictures. Yeah, that's right. Bob Crosby's all the product. Yeah, yeah,
the croneer with the four sons. Huh was being always
a croner? No, he studied singing page years before he
(02:00):
maun and he couldn't sing but by that time was
too lad he was too famous to quit. Hey, Duffy,
why don't you sell Binger have an interest in that
joint here?
Speaker 2 (02:11):
Oh kidding? Well it guy like that could help us
with the labor shortage. Eh.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
He grows his own bus boys, and missus Duffy wants
to make bing one form. But Duffy, what could he
use it for? She's too big for a sarang and
too slow for the track. And well, I'll talk to
thing about the partnership, Duffy. Okay, go on, Ladies and.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Gentlemen, welcome to Duppies. Come on in and be Bennigan.
I'd neither wait her. Missus Duffy, Paul Western and his orchestra,
our special guest tonight, by courtesy of craft, Bing calls
me him and Archie himself, Ed Gardner.
Speaker 3 (03:07):
Addie, did you hear bing Crosby might buy a half
interest in this place?
Speaker 4 (03:12):
What?
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Bing Crosby, the one.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
That wears them shirt, Yeah, the one with the fourth
n Yeah, the one with them race Harper.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Yeah, you're gonna buy half interest in this place? Yeah?
I suppose you just don't care anymore. Listen, Eddie.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
With good management, this place could you a very nice overhead. Uh,
especially with the no floor show that I wrote for Crosby.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
You wrote it, huh yeah, I wrote it. It's gonna
have the same flavor as his radio show. He's on
a cheese program. Annie, Yeah, yeah, yeah, good. Huh. Let's
see it's uh truly one uh John Trot Scott eh yeah,
(04:07):
Carb Keppinger Yeah, come yeah. Not Yuki. Oh who's gonna
be Yuki? You No, I'm too staturesque. Noh for the
part of Yuki. I gotta get a gun that's very
short and a little stupid. Uh hmm, not quite short
(04:30):
of nothing. Uh no, but he's a little more stupid,
so it comes out even uh, Finnigan, how would you
like to be an actor? To an actor?
Speaker 5 (04:40):
Oh boy, I got how come.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
You to calm yourself? Anything will stop?
Speaker 3 (04:53):
It began? I don't. I don't mean a song and dance. Man,
I'm ain't a comedian commedian.
Speaker 5 (05:03):
You're right, I got a good joke. Why does your
fireman wear regispenders?
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Why to get onto the other shode?
Speaker 3 (05:13):
Then again, I'm afraid your humor is a little too
delicate for this show. Oh everything happens to me mus Stuffy,
will you please stop with that noise?
Speaker 2 (05:27):
Well, what's wrong with my voice? Oh? Nothing, nothing at all.
Speaker 3 (05:30):
But how can you yell like that with nobody beating you?
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Who?
Speaker 4 (05:38):
My singing teacher says, I have perfect pitch.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
Well you may have perfect pitch, but if you start
singing around, hey, you better learn how to catch.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
What's this about the singing teacher?
Speaker 4 (05:48):
Runnyhow oh you remember my old singing teacher, Yasha pan Slavnik.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Good old walk up one flight Yasher. I thought he
was in the army.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
They wouldn't take him. Why not punch your your drums?
Speaker 3 (06:03):
Huh And I'll bet you that you're the one at
four f the guy. So he's trying to teach you again.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Huh.
Speaker 4 (06:11):
Yeah, he has a new method now, the op A method,
he says. All you have to remember when singing.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
Is op A opn Yeah. Open, please be agnoid.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
Oh joy, you get way till bing Krugby hears me.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
Now listen, miss Stuffer, when Cosby gets here, if you
open one crummy adnoid trying to get the guy to
buy a hair of an interest from your father.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
Oh, Papa's partner. That's very interesting, Stuffy. He's buying an
interest only in the joint. You still belong to Daddy. Besides,
the guy is married.
Speaker 4 (07:01):
Back to travel a look, have to have partners in
the marry.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
What other partners is married?
Speaker 3 (07:08):
Mamma, Harry, Harry von zeal Less Archie, not talk to me? Please,
well it before I completely retain my sanity, Just say
anything so it makes some sense.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Well, I know something that makes sense. Art a lot
of sense, and go ahead, Harry. Please Well, ladies and gentlemen.
You never know what the morning will bring you, do
You never know, for instance, when you may wake up
feeling dull and headache you due to the need of
a laxative, and so it certainly pays you to remember this.
When you do wake up feeling like that, it isn't
necessary to put off taking that laxative till bedtime, no
(07:42):
matter what your plans may be. Simply takes hal heapatka
at once for then speedy sal heapatka brings very gentle relief,
usually within an hour. So you can see you no
longer have to wait till night to take the laxative
needed in the morning, and consequently no longer have to
risk going through the whole day feeling out of sorts,
and don't forget this famous ceiling has an additional advantage.
(08:04):
Sparkling sal hepatica also helps sweeten an upset stomach by
helping to reduce excess gastric acidity. So sometime soon tonight,
if you can stop at your drug store for an
economical bottle of sal hepatica, remembering this caution, use only
as directed than any time you know you need a
laxative morning, noon or night. See if you don't feel
(08:25):
better faster when you take gentle speedy salhapatica. Let me see,
I gotta figure out what this business woright there, Eddie?
How many new customers there? Would you say, come in
his place tonight? Let me see.
Speaker 5 (08:44):
One, two, three, And yet I'm number four on outside.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
Being crossed out at.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
The money again, Well, thang, welcome the duffies.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
How do you like the joint here? Frankly, Archie? It
warms the cockles of this pedipoatetic old Trubadour's palpitator to
find himself so unostentatiously ensconced within the sacred precincts of
this tangle, for the empodium pops out with them syllables
like they were sons.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Of course, I personally don't mind them big words, man,
but it ain't fair to people who don't understand them,
you know who, like you olives or if you want
to use big words, how much your vocabulary. I'll watch
you anytime. Okay, art truce?
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Huh? Right now? How do you like the joint here?
Briefly stinks you don't have to beat that briefly. Well,
your role man was down here last week. He liked
the place. Oh yeah, well, Pop always was a dive man,
(09:59):
Old hank Er Crosby they used to call up in
the Northwest. By the way, he was a little embarrassed, Archie,
he says, he came away without paying his check. Oh well,
tell you, oh gentlemen, to forget it. We'll added on
to yours. Addie, get mister Crosby's steak by the way
at twenty center. He can afford it. By the way,
(10:22):
bing your own man was saying, how nice he is
on you. You know how you as well get along
in your family. Oh yeah, we'd give each other the
shirt off our backs, and you still get along, eh, Archie?
Are you knocking this creton? Creta creation that I'm affecting
the number for Crosby in this neighborhood.
Speaker 3 (10:43):
This fifty nine guys would lead pipes that just looking
for somebody with them Creton cretations like.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
Little too sharp for you. Uh yeah, it's a lot,
you see. Now take me for contrast, take the way
I addressed. You see, these pants used to be part
of a whole suit, right you see it's quiet, good taste,
made out of genuine herring bonds herring, huh yeah. The
(11:19):
knees look a little marinated, I thought, yeah, And now
take my shake, you know, look at it simple, not
a bit sentatious. You know you got a cute idea
that too, that having the collars and the cuffs trimmed
in black. I mean, man right, he must have forgot
(11:41):
to turn them over this way? Can they're coming up
with the grog just the second? Is that a state? Yeah,
put a couple of bucks on it to wind Will.
Now I've just played at the show, and he maybe
a better scratch.
Speaker 5 (11:57):
It'd like to meet mister Kreisman.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Oh oh, mister mister Figan.
Speaker 5 (12:07):
Miss I'm glad to make you. You know I've been
pulled up. My voice sound just like yours?
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Who told you that?
Speaker 3 (12:18):
Frank Sinatra? Oh, I'm not thing this is missed uppy.
Her voice also sound sound like yours.
Speaker 4 (12:31):
How do you do, mister k there after?
Speaker 2 (12:33):
You ever pictures your neighbor do if you remove?
Speaker 4 (12:36):
It must be quite a shock for you to see
a girl with her clothes on.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
Well, I was shocked when I saw you, but I
wasn't sure. Just what did it? Did you like that
to round? And mister the move with when you say it? Oh,
I never gave it a second thought.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
Oh you didn't.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
I was a little busy with the first.
Speaker 4 (12:54):
Of Well, I think it's indecent. I wouldn't be seen
wearing so little.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
You've got a lot more to cover than the more archie.
Speaker 4 (13:08):
I had a lovely figure last week. Mister Crosby's father's
eyes nearly popped out.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Oh you met dad? Huh? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (13:15):
And he sent me a fine looking for a man
of forty?
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Would you hit me with that again?
Speaker 4 (13:20):
Was he told me he was forty years.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Old twenty years ago? Yeah?
Speaker 6 (13:27):
I bet you.
Speaker 4 (13:27):
It was a lie about his etchings too.
Speaker 2 (13:29):
What did you do in my look my stuff? He?
Would you mind answering the phone? It is ringing it
will give it time. Now, Look, thing, I want to
talk a little business to you. All right, how long
you been on that radio showing yours around fifteen years?
Fifteen years? Then you're in a rut. Now look wave
(13:54):
us be taste. What are we going to be race? Oh?
How would you like to buy and half interest in Duffy?
Buy half of this place, Archie. I already owned two stables? Bing?
Are you calling this place a stable? I was only kidding.
I'm sorry. Oh that's ain't been a horse in himphi
(14:16):
is now look man as a restaurant man. But I
don't I really don't know anything about the restaurant business.
Well you don't have to. When you fight half for Duffies,
you fight half of me, half of you. You said
there hasn't been a horse in here in years? No,
(14:36):
you see thing, I'm included in Duffies half of the deal,
and I'm a fixture hair what they called the lock stock?
What about the barrel? That's missus Duffy. Now, thing with
the floor show that I got in mind? Excuse me
a minute. Hello hello Duffy. Yeah he's here. Huh. I
just told him about it, okay, Bing the other he
(15:00):
up for the barrel. Okay, hello mister Duffy. Well, I
haven't met you, but I've seen your picture in the
window and in my What you say? Do I think
you look like Hope? No? I think you look a
little more like Charity. What did you say? Half interested
in your place? Well? I'm half interested. How much do
(15:23):
you want for it? Do you think I'm made of money?
Three hundred bucks? Give me the phone? Look, Duffy, don't
be a robber. Huh? Well about two hundred? Well would
Crosby singing?
Speaker 5 (15:38):
Here?
Speaker 2 (15:38):
I'll bet you have no time to join us worth
at least eight hundred. Huh.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
Why should you sell half of a business that's gonna
be worth eight hundred for two hundred?
Speaker 2 (15:49):
Yeah, maybe you're right.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Maybe if I explain to them how much business he'll
bring in the he'll be willing to come up a little. Huh,
Aurial sing I won't be a partner. I don't see
how you can stop him. Huh uh, Chris, you want
to watch? Do you want to want?
Speaker 2 (16:10):
I'll tell him thing Stuffy would like an audition?
Speaker 6 (16:13):
What you mean me?
Speaker 3 (16:14):
Audition for that bum craised thing? You are speaking of
your partner? The bum wants an audition, Give it to him.
Call some music from mister Crosby plays.
Speaker 6 (16:31):
How sweet you are, How sweet you are, how dear
your tenderly smile?
Speaker 7 (16:46):
And who days all different gray and grimn.
Speaker 6 (17:02):
When even the stars a di all squeez can know
my heart can blow from the the walls of your
(17:22):
sweed in b the world, the long near world, by Pa,
when I remember how sweet.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
Are Oh hello wall my ball, when.
Speaker 6 (18:11):
All remember Alphie.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
You are? Hello, Duppy?
Speaker 3 (18:41):
Why'd you think of him? Mm hmmm, you'd rather have
a silent fuck? Oh look, Duppy, I give him another chance,
So listen to him once more on this four show
that I wrote. Okay, Duffy, all right?
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Did I hear you say that you wrote a flaw show?
Yeh thing? And if Duffy likes it, you're in Now
How do I get out? Mister Crosby, you look sort
of pale. There are seven of you Crosbies, aren't there?
Well maybe you're the one, the one one, the one
(19:22):
person out of every seven who this time of year
usually suffers from a cold. And I don't thing if
you had one more brother and we might have stopped
them dead. Yeah, But how then would we know what
to do about that cold, so proceed with the good ward,
my good man, so thank you, mister Crosby. If cold
(19:48):
symptoms are making you miserable, ladies and gentlemen, your nose
is stuffed up and there's that aching feeling in your muscles,
the good word is minute rough to help get relieved quickly,
and the simply massage minute rubbed modern chest rub on
your back and chest. Yes, that's all you do, and soon,
in fact, even before you finished, you feel a comforting
(20:09):
sensation of warmth as minute rub gets to work, begins
to soothe the discomfort and tightness caused by your cold,
and at the same time, minute Rub's active menthol vapors
help relieve that congested feeling in your nose and throat.
No need to worry about minute Rub harming your clothes
or linens. It's greaseless and it's stainless too, So get
(20:29):
after your cold symptoms with this nationally famous chest rub
that takes only a minute to use that helps bring
such quick relief. Minute Rub m I N T R
U B Minute Rub.
Speaker 3 (21:34):
Okay, everybody, now we're going to start the floor show.
Missed up in flinning and you got your pounds. Actually,
I just can't go through with this. Why not think
but I've read your script and I don't like to
do tragedies. You're saying, no tragedy, nobody's gonna get killed.
Speaker 2 (21:50):
You can have eight to five fucking don't worry about it.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
Now, let's go already music please, good evening, ladies and gentlemen,
and welcome to the old Duffy music Call. This is
your announcer, Kennachie, and we now present yours truly bing
call up the glue factory, Crosby, now take it, bringing
(22:21):
stick to the script, Greetings and salutations to.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
The old up the music hall where we gather. To
Archie is at the end of the sentence, of course,
wouldn't think of splitting up a infinitive continue now that
the uld tide of Christmas is behooving upon us in
three more semesters, And wherefore which in this Christmas purchasing
(22:43):
season of gifts from one's fellow man to another, lee
must be mindful in our ex mishoppy of the moor
words of shape, thee I can't do, can't handle it,
can't do it, Go ahead read it. The quality of
(23:06):
Macy's is not strange the playing words come on and
let's let's go on with a show. Now, good ethnic being. Well,
if it ain't our comedian, Hello, Jerky Turkey, say Archie,
(23:26):
shouldn't this be Yuki? Take a look at him? Hello, Jerky?
Why were you riding in the park yesterday side saddle show?
Because it was your female horse?
Speaker 3 (23:39):
Got hello, Duffy, you didn't get that joke? Well, it
don't make no difference, Duffy. Any joke about Bing's horses
is a belly lamp.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
Why? I don't know.
Speaker 3 (23:53):
Maybe on account of they run on their bellies. Okay, Duffy,
I'm what a s out sight being? Yes, Jackie, you've
got four sons, ain't you?
Speaker 2 (24:04):
Yes? And Eddie can't. Ha's got five daughters. Why don't
you have your four sons married? Can't's five daughters? But Jerkie,
there would be one girl left over. Well, somebody's got
to take care of Jesso's mother.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Great dialogue, h'm Bing, I say, great dialogue, hum Bing.
We now stop for station and diemnification Eddie, okay, Bing
take it well.
Speaker 2 (24:37):
Once again we're back in the good old Duffy music
Welcome to classic comedy of old time radio. I'm your host,
ron Eickelbarger. Archie tries to talk Duffy into selling Bing
Crosby a half interest in the tavern. But even if
Archie can convince Duffy to sell, he still has to
convince Bing to buy. This is episode number one hundred
(00:37):
and seven of Duffy's Tavern, entitled Guest Bing Crosbie. It
originally aired on December seventh, nineteen forty three.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Brisdol Myers, the makers of Salhapatika, Famous Laxaviv and Minute
Rubbs Modern chest rub brings you, Duffy.
Speaker 3 (01:11):
Hello, Duffy's where you eat me? Did an't you to
manage speaking? Duffy ain't here? Hello Duffy.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Uh, Well tonight, Duffy, we really got a big shop.
Bing Crosby Crosbie, she r c r osb.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
You know that guy Duffy, the straight man and the
Bob Hope Pictures. Yeah, that's right. Bob Crosby's all the product. Yeah, yeah,
the croneer with the four sons. Huh was being always
a croner? No, he studied singing page years before he
(02:00):
maun and he couldn't sing but by that time was
too lad he was too famous to quit. Hey, Duffy,
why don't you sell Binger have an interest in that
joint here?
Speaker 2 (02:11):
Oh kidding? Well it guy like that could help us
with the labor shortage. Eh.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
He grows his own bus boys, and missus Duffy wants
to make bing one form. But Duffy, what could he
use it for? She's too big for a sarang and
too slow for the track. And well, I'll talk to
thing about the partnership, Duffy. Okay, go on, Ladies and.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Gentlemen, welcome to Duppies. Come on in and be Bennigan.
I'd neither wait her. Missus Duffy, Paul Western and his orchestra,
our special guest tonight, by courtesy of craft, Bing calls
me him and Archie himself, Ed Gardner.
Speaker 3 (03:07):
Addie, did you hear bing Crosby might buy a half
interest in this place?
Speaker 4 (03:12):
What?
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Bing Crosby, the one.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
That wears them shirt, Yeah, the one with the fourth
n Yeah, the one with them race Harper.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Yeah, you're gonna buy half interest in this place? Yeah?
I suppose you just don't care anymore. Listen, Eddie.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
With good management, this place could you a very nice overhead. Uh,
especially with the no floor show that I wrote for Crosby.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
You wrote it, huh yeah, I wrote it. It's gonna
have the same flavor as his radio show. He's on
a cheese program. Annie, Yeah, yeah, yeah, good. Huh. Let's
see it's uh truly one uh John Trot Scott eh yeah,
(04:07):
Carb Keppinger Yeah, come yeah. Not Yuki. Oh who's gonna
be Yuki? You No, I'm too staturesque. Noh for the
part of Yuki. I gotta get a gun that's very
short and a little stupid. Uh hmm, not quite short
(04:30):
of nothing. Uh no, but he's a little more stupid,
so it comes out even uh, Finnigan, how would you
like to be an actor? To an actor?
Speaker 5 (04:40):
Oh boy, I got how come.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
You to calm yourself? Anything will stop?
Speaker 3 (04:53):
It began? I don't. I don't mean a song and dance. Man,
I'm ain't a comedian commedian.
Speaker 5 (05:03):
You're right, I got a good joke. Why does your
fireman wear regispenders?
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Why to get onto the other shode?
Speaker 3 (05:13):
Then again, I'm afraid your humor is a little too
delicate for this show. Oh everything happens to me mus Stuffy,
will you please stop with that noise?
Speaker 2 (05:27):
Well, what's wrong with my voice? Oh? Nothing, nothing at all.
Speaker 3 (05:30):
But how can you yell like that with nobody beating you?
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Who?
Speaker 4 (05:38):
My singing teacher says, I have perfect pitch.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
Well you may have perfect pitch, but if you start
singing around, hey, you better learn how to catch.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
What's this about the singing teacher?
Speaker 4 (05:48):
Runnyhow oh you remember my old singing teacher, Yasha pan Slavnik.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Good old walk up one flight Yasher. I thought he
was in the army.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
They wouldn't take him. Why not punch your your drums?
Speaker 3 (06:03):
Huh And I'll bet you that you're the one at
four f the guy. So he's trying to teach you again.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Huh.
Speaker 4 (06:11):
Yeah, he has a new method now, the op A method,
he says. All you have to remember when singing.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
Is op A opn Yeah. Open, please be agnoid.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
Oh joy, you get way till bing Krugby hears me.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
Now listen, miss Stuffer, when Cosby gets here, if you
open one crummy adnoid trying to get the guy to
buy a hair of an interest from your father.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
Oh, Papa's partner. That's very interesting, Stuffy. He's buying an
interest only in the joint. You still belong to Daddy. Besides,
the guy is married.
Speaker 4 (07:01):
Back to travel a look, have to have partners in
the marry.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
What other partners is married?
Speaker 3 (07:08):
Mamma, Harry, Harry von zeal Less Archie, not talk to me? Please,
well it before I completely retain my sanity, Just say
anything so it makes some sense.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Well, I know something that makes sense. Art a lot
of sense, and go ahead, Harry. Please Well, ladies and gentlemen.
You never know what the morning will bring you, do
You never know, for instance, when you may wake up
feeling dull and headache you due to the need of
a laxative, and so it certainly pays you to remember this.
When you do wake up feeling like that, it isn't
necessary to put off taking that laxative till bedtime, no
(07:42):
matter what your plans may be. Simply takes hal heapatka
at once for then speedy sal heapatka brings very gentle relief,
usually within an hour. So you can see you no
longer have to wait till night to take the laxative
needed in the morning, and consequently no longer have to
risk going through the whole day feeling out of sorts,
and don't forget this famous ceiling has an additional advantage.
(08:04):
Sparkling sal hepatica also helps sweeten an upset stomach by
helping to reduce excess gastric acidity. So sometime soon tonight,
if you can stop at your drug store for an
economical bottle of sal hepatica, remembering this caution, use only
as directed than any time you know you need a
laxative morning, noon or night. See if you don't feel
(08:25):
better faster when you take gentle speedy salhapatica. Let me see,
I gotta figure out what this business woright there, Eddie?
How many new customers there? Would you say, come in
his place tonight? Let me see.
Speaker 5 (08:44):
One, two, three, And yet I'm number four on outside.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
Being crossed out at.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
The money again, Well, thang, welcome the duffies.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
How do you like the joint here? Frankly, Archie? It
warms the cockles of this pedipoatetic old Trubadour's palpitator to
find himself so unostentatiously ensconced within the sacred precincts of
this tangle, for the empodium pops out with them syllables
like they were sons.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Of course, I personally don't mind them big words, man,
but it ain't fair to people who don't understand them,
you know who, like you olives or if you want
to use big words, how much your vocabulary. I'll watch
you anytime. Okay, art truce?
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Huh? Right now? How do you like the joint here?
Briefly stinks you don't have to beat that briefly. Well,
your role man was down here last week. He liked
the place. Oh yeah, well, Pop always was a dive man,
(09:59):
Old hank Er Crosby they used to call up in
the Northwest. By the way, he was a little embarrassed, Archie,
he says, he came away without paying his check. Oh well,
tell you, oh gentlemen, to forget it. We'll added on
to yours. Addie, get mister Crosby's steak by the way
at twenty center. He can afford it. By the way,
(10:22):
bing your own man was saying, how nice he is
on you. You know how you as well get along
in your family. Oh yeah, we'd give each other the
shirt off our backs, and you still get along, eh, Archie?
Are you knocking this creton? Creta creation that I'm affecting
the number for Crosby in this neighborhood.
Speaker 3 (10:43):
This fifty nine guys would lead pipes that just looking
for somebody with them Creton cretations like.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
Little too sharp for you. Uh yeah, it's a lot,
you see. Now take me for contrast, take the way
I addressed. You see, these pants used to be part
of a whole suit, right you see it's quiet, good taste,
made out of genuine herring bonds herring, huh yeah. The
(11:19):
knees look a little marinated, I thought, yeah, And now
take my shake, you know, look at it simple, not
a bit sentatious. You know you got a cute idea
that too, that having the collars and the cuffs trimmed
in black. I mean, man right, he must have forgot
(11:41):
to turn them over this way? Can they're coming up
with the grog just the second? Is that a state? Yeah,
put a couple of bucks on it to wind Will.
Now I've just played at the show, and he maybe
a better scratch.
Speaker 5 (11:57):
It'd like to meet mister Kreisman.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Oh oh, mister mister Figan.
Speaker 5 (12:07):
Miss I'm glad to make you. You know I've been
pulled up. My voice sound just like yours?
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Who told you that?
Speaker 3 (12:18):
Frank Sinatra? Oh, I'm not thing this is missed uppy.
Her voice also sound sound like yours.
Speaker 4 (12:31):
How do you do, mister k there after?
Speaker 2 (12:33):
You ever pictures your neighbor do if you remove?
Speaker 4 (12:36):
It must be quite a shock for you to see
a girl with her clothes on.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
Well, I was shocked when I saw you, but I
wasn't sure. Just what did it? Did you like that
to round? And mister the move with when you say it? Oh,
I never gave it a second thought.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
Oh you didn't.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
I was a little busy with the first.
Speaker 4 (12:54):
Of Well, I think it's indecent. I wouldn't be seen
wearing so little.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
You've got a lot more to cover than the more archie.
Speaker 4 (13:08):
I had a lovely figure last week. Mister Crosby's father's
eyes nearly popped out.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Oh you met dad? Huh? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (13:15):
And he sent me a fine looking for a man
of forty?
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Would you hit me with that again?
Speaker 4 (13:20):
Was he told me he was forty years.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Old twenty years ago? Yeah?
Speaker 6 (13:27):
I bet you.
Speaker 4 (13:27):
It was a lie about his etchings too.
Speaker 2 (13:29):
What did you do in my look my stuff? He?
Would you mind answering the phone? It is ringing it
will give it time. Now, Look, thing, I want to
talk a little business to you. All right, how long
you been on that radio showing yours around fifteen years?
Fifteen years? Then you're in a rut. Now look wave
(13:54):
us be taste. What are we going to be race? Oh?
How would you like to buy and half interest in Duffy?
Buy half of this place, Archie. I already owned two stables? Bing?
Are you calling this place a stable? I was only kidding.
I'm sorry. Oh that's ain't been a horse in himphi
(14:16):
is now look man as a restaurant man. But I
don't I really don't know anything about the restaurant business.
Well you don't have to. When you fight half for Duffies,
you fight half of me, half of you. You said
there hasn't been a horse in here in years? No,
(14:36):
you see thing, I'm included in Duffies half of the deal,
and I'm a fixture hair what they called the lock stock?
What about the barrel? That's missus Duffy. Now, thing with
the floor show that I got in mind? Excuse me
a minute. Hello hello Duffy. Yeah he's here. Huh. I
just told him about it, okay, Bing the other he
(15:00):
up for the barrel. Okay, hello mister Duffy. Well, I
haven't met you, but I've seen your picture in the
window and in my What you say? Do I think
you look like Hope? No? I think you look a
little more like Charity. What did you say? Half interested
in your place? Well? I'm half interested. How much do
(15:23):
you want for it? Do you think I'm made of money?
Three hundred bucks? Give me the phone? Look, Duffy, don't
be a robber. Huh? Well about two hundred? Well would
Crosby singing?
Speaker 5 (15:38):
Here?
Speaker 2 (15:38):
I'll bet you have no time to join us worth
at least eight hundred. Huh.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
Why should you sell half of a business that's gonna
be worth eight hundred for two hundred?
Speaker 2 (15:49):
Yeah, maybe you're right.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Maybe if I explain to them how much business he'll
bring in the he'll be willing to come up a little. Huh,
Aurial sing I won't be a partner. I don't see
how you can stop him. Huh uh, Chris, you want
to watch? Do you want to want?
Speaker 2 (16:10):
I'll tell him thing Stuffy would like an audition?
Speaker 6 (16:13):
What you mean me?
Speaker 3 (16:14):
Audition for that bum craised thing? You are speaking of
your partner? The bum wants an audition, Give it to him.
Call some music from mister Crosby plays.
Speaker 6 (16:31):
How sweet you are, How sweet you are, how dear
your tenderly smile?
Speaker 7 (16:46):
And who days all different gray and grimn.
Speaker 6 (17:02):
When even the stars a di all squeez can know
my heart can blow from the the walls of your
(17:22):
sweed in b the world, the long near world, by Pa,
when I remember how sweet.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
Are Oh hello wall my ball, when.
Speaker 6 (18:11):
All remember Alphie.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
You are? Hello, Duppy?
Speaker 3 (18:41):
Why'd you think of him? Mm hmmm, you'd rather have
a silent fuck? Oh look, Duppy, I give him another chance,
So listen to him once more on this four show
that I wrote. Okay, Duffy, all right?
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Did I hear you say that you wrote a flaw show?
Yeh thing? And if Duffy likes it, you're in Now
How do I get out? Mister Crosby, you look sort
of pale. There are seven of you Crosbies, aren't there?
Well maybe you're the one, the one one, the one
(19:22):
person out of every seven who this time of year
usually suffers from a cold. And I don't thing if
you had one more brother and we might have stopped
them dead. Yeah, But how then would we know what
to do about that cold, so proceed with the good ward,
my good man, so thank you, mister Crosby. If cold
(19:48):
symptoms are making you miserable, ladies and gentlemen, your nose
is stuffed up and there's that aching feeling in your muscles,
the good word is minute rough to help get relieved quickly,
and the simply massage minute rubbed modern chest rub on
your back and chest. Yes, that's all you do, and soon,
in fact, even before you finished, you feel a comforting
(20:09):
sensation of warmth as minute rub gets to work, begins
to soothe the discomfort and tightness caused by your cold,
and at the same time, minute Rub's active menthol vapors
help relieve that congested feeling in your nose and throat.
No need to worry about minute Rub harming your clothes
or linens. It's greaseless and it's stainless too, So get
(20:29):
after your cold symptoms with this nationally famous chest rub
that takes only a minute to use that helps bring
such quick relief. Minute Rub m I N T R
U B Minute Rub.
Speaker 3 (21:34):
Okay, everybody, now we're going to start the floor show.
Missed up in flinning and you got your pounds. Actually,
I just can't go through with this. Why not think
but I've read your script and I don't like to
do tragedies. You're saying, no tragedy, nobody's gonna get killed.
Speaker 2 (21:50):
You can have eight to five fucking don't worry about it.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
Now, let's go already music please, good evening, ladies and gentlemen,
and welcome to the old Duffy music Call. This is
your announcer, Kennachie, and we now present yours truly bing
call up the glue factory, Crosby, now take it, bringing
(22:21):
stick to the script, Greetings and salutations to.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
The old up the music hall where we gather. To
Archie is at the end of the sentence, of course,
wouldn't think of splitting up a infinitive continue now that
the uld tide of Christmas is behooving upon us in
three more semesters, And wherefore which in this Christmas purchasing
(22:43):
season of gifts from one's fellow man to another, lee
must be mindful in our ex mishoppy of the moor
words of shape, thee I can't do, can't handle it,
can't do it, Go ahead read it. The quality of
(23:06):
Macy's is not strange the playing words come on and
let's let's go on with a show. Now, good ethnic being. Well,
if it ain't our comedian, Hello, Jerky Turkey, say Archie,
(23:26):
shouldn't this be Yuki? Take a look at him? Hello, Jerky?
Why were you riding in the park yesterday side saddle show?
Because it was your female horse?
Speaker 3 (23:39):
Got hello, Duffy, you didn't get that joke? Well, it
don't make no difference, Duffy. Any joke about Bing's horses
is a belly lamp.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
Why? I don't know.
Speaker 3 (23:53):
Maybe on account of they run on their bellies. Okay, Duffy,
I'm what a s out sight being? Yes, Jackie, you've
got four sons, ain't you?
Speaker 2 (24:04):
Yes? And Eddie can't. Ha's got five daughters. Why don't
you have your four sons married? Can't's five daughters? But Jerkie,
there would be one girl left over. Well, somebody's got
to take care of Jesso's mother.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Great dialogue, h'm Bing, I say, great dialogue, hum Bing.
We now stop for station and diemnification Eddie, okay, Bing
take it well.
Speaker 2 (24:37):
Once again we're back in the good old Duffy music
Popular Podcasts
CrimeLess: Hillbilly Heist
It’s 1996 in rural North Carolina, and an oddball crew makes history when they pull off America’s third largest cash heist. But it’s all downhill from there. Join host Johnny Knoxville as he unspools a wild and woolly tale about a group of regular ‘ol folks who risked it all for a chance at a better life. CrimeLess: Hillbilly Heist answers the question: what would you do with 17.3 million dollars? The answer includes diamond rings, mansions, velvet Elvis paintings, plus a run for the border, murder-for-hire-plots, and FBI busts.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.