June 17, 2025 • 31 mins
When Margaret and the kids return home from spending the summer at Round Lake, they are in for a surprise.
Originally aired on September 7, 1950. This is episode 46 of Father Knows Best.
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Originally aired on September 7, 1950. This is episode 46 of Father Knows Best.
Please email questions and comments to host@classiccomedyotr.com.
Like us on Facebook at facebook.com/classiccomedyotr. Please share this podcast with your friends and family.
You can also subscribe to our podcast on Spreaker.com, Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, and Google podcasts.
This show is supported by Spreaker Prime.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Welcome to classic comedy of old time radio. I'm your
host Ron Ecklbarger. When Margaret and the kids return home
from spending the summer at Round Lake, they are in
for a surprise, and of course father knows best. This
(00:36):
is episode forty five of Father Knows Best, entitled An
Efficient House. It originally aired on September seventh, nineteen fifty Mother.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
Is Nashville House really the only coffee in the.
Speaker 3 (00:53):
World, Well, your father says so, and your father knows best.
Speaker 4 (01:08):
Yes, its father knows Best. Transcribed in Hollywood starring Robert Young,
His Father's A half hour visit with your neighbors, the Andersons,
brought to you by America's favorite coffee, Maxwell House, the
coffee that's always good to the last drop. If an
(01:37):
arrow rises, it must fall, If a river flows, it
must bend. And be they long or be they small?
All vacations have an air in Springfield, which is still
an average town. Live the Anderson's just an average American
family with the average American trials and tribulations. Their car
is rolling rapidly toward the white frame house on Maple Street,
(02:00):
and as they return from a long summer holiday at
Round Lake, it might be interesting to note the thoughts
which occupy their minds. For instance, there's Kathy aged nine.
Speaker 5 (02:10):
Gee whizz. Next week we have to go.
Speaker 6 (02:13):
Back to school, Bud who is fifteen gosh, next week
we have to go back to school.
Speaker 4 (02:20):
And Betty, who was a very adult seventeen Jonathan creepers.
Speaker 5 (02:24):
Next week we have to go back to school.
Speaker 4 (02:27):
Then, of course there's Margaret, the mother of the broupe.
Speaker 7 (02:30):
Next week the children go back to school.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
Last but by no means least bother himself. Jim Anderson,
Well it won't be long.
Speaker 8 (02:42):
Now here's Maple.
Speaker 5 (02:43):
There's Jimmy Waite.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
Jimmy, Now, will you Bud stop pushing.
Speaker 6 (02:47):
I'm not pushing. Kathy's standing on my foot.
Speaker 7 (02:50):
Kathleen, sit still and behave yourself.
Speaker 5 (02:52):
I'm saying, hello, Jimmy.
Speaker 9 (02:54):
There'll be plenty of time for that. Jim. Are you
sure everything's all right at the house?
Speaker 4 (03:02):
Of course, everything's all right. Why well, you look just.
Speaker 9 (03:05):
Like a boy with his hand in the jam pot.
And if you've done anything.
Speaker 2 (03:09):
Silsy you Oh Kathy sip down, that was silsy. Well
you don't have to jump out the window.
Speaker 6 (03:18):
Look what she did to my shoe.
Speaker 5 (03:20):
I did not.
Speaker 6 (03:21):
You certainly did.
Speaker 5 (03:22):
I certainly didn't.
Speaker 6 (03:24):
You certainly did.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
I certainly didn't. Kathy, would you please stop screeching in
my ear?
Speaker 5 (03:30):
I wasn't screeching in your ear.
Speaker 7 (03:32):
You certainly why?
Speaker 5 (03:34):
Certainly?
Speaker 10 (03:35):
Why?
Speaker 8 (03:37):
All right, that's enough?
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Well, she said, I was screeching in hurry.
Speaker 8 (03:41):
I said that's enough, and I wasn't.
Speaker 6 (03:47):
Hey, here's the house.
Speaker 7 (03:49):
Well that's a relief.
Speaker 8 (03:52):
What do you mean by that?
Speaker 5 (03:53):
Oh?
Speaker 9 (03:54):
Nothing, It's just that when you get that peculiar look
on your face, I never know what to expect. I
thought maybe you had the house pain to purple or something.
Speaker 4 (04:01):
I see here Martin.
Speaker 9 (04:03):
I know you mean well, but whenever the children and
I go away, you get such weird ideas about the house.
Speaker 4 (04:09):
Oh like the barbecue pit I built last summer. I
suppose that was a weird idea.
Speaker 6 (04:14):
No, it was.
Speaker 7 (04:14):
Fine until it fell apart.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
How about the year you decided to turn the playroom
into a.
Speaker 8 (04:20):
Bowling alley never mind?
Speaker 6 (04:23):
Or the year you painted the living room green and
Mom had to send.
Speaker 8 (04:26):
All the fun I said, never mind.
Speaker 6 (04:29):
Oh gosh, I was only trying to help.
Speaker 8 (04:34):
Kathleen. Right after dinner, you go to bed.
Speaker 5 (04:37):
But I didn't say anything.
Speaker 4 (04:40):
I know just what you were thinking, and I won't
stand for it.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
But I wasn't thinking about the fire alarm you built
in the other.
Speaker 8 (04:54):
Well, don't just sit there.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
But we're home.
Speaker 8 (04:56):
Let's get the luggage into the house.
Speaker 4 (04:58):
Okay, Dad, it's a little extra pride in his home.
And what happens people make fun of him, treat him
like the village idiots.
Speaker 7 (05:04):
Oh, Jim, we weren't making fun of you.
Speaker 8 (05:07):
You certainly were.
Speaker 4 (05:08):
You thought I was going to paint the house purple?
Speaker 7 (05:10):
No I didn't, Dear. I merely said, Joe, Hey.
Speaker 4 (05:14):
Joe, come back here. Where do you think you're going?
Speaker 6 (05:16):
I just saw Joe Phillips.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
Well, take a look at the suitcases. They come first.
Holy call, Kathy, that is not where we live.
Speaker 8 (05:26):
This is our house, the white one.
Speaker 9 (05:30):
You can see Patty in the morning. Dear, Right now,
we've all got to help your father.
Speaker 8 (05:35):
Jee wis Well.
Speaker 4 (05:38):
I guess that's about everything, Jim, Margaret has nothing to
worry about it. I haven't done anything to the house,
nothing much anyway.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
Oh, dear Kathy, push the water bottle under my chin.
Speaker 5 (05:51):
It's kippy. Want me to carry it?
Speaker 7 (05:53):
Just push it over a little.
Speaker 5 (05:56):
Why can't I carry it? Kathy? It broke?
Speaker 4 (06:07):
I don't know. People go away all the time and
come home all the time. They don't get into things
like this. Only this family, if.
Speaker 8 (06:13):
We so much as go across the.
Speaker 6 (06:14):
Street, Dad, these bags are getting heavy.
Speaker 8 (06:17):
Well, put them down.
Speaker 6 (06:19):
Don't you want me to take them inside?
Speaker 8 (06:21):
Naturally?
Speaker 4 (06:21):
I want you to take them inside?
Speaker 6 (06:24):
How can I take them inside if I put them down?
Speaker 4 (06:29):
Margaret?
Speaker 7 (06:30):
It's all right there, I have my keys.
Speaker 4 (06:36):
There we are, Kathy, hold the screen door open until
we get in. Yes, see, if you can manage not
to break it.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
Oh, how can you break the screen door?
Speaker 8 (06:45):
I don't know, but don't try to find out. All right,
but let's go.
Speaker 6 (06:52):
I don't think I can make it. This little bag
feels like it's got rocks in it.
Speaker 4 (06:56):
Kathy, What have you gotten your suitcase? Rocks?
Speaker 7 (07:03):
Rocks, special rocks.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
I'm saving them.
Speaker 4 (07:06):
Gods, we haven't got enough rocks in Springfield. She has
to bring a suitcase full of them back from round Leigh.
Speaker 5 (07:13):
They're all different colors, Bud.
Speaker 4 (07:15):
Take them out in back of the garage and dump them.
Speaker 6 (07:17):
Okay, it's practically a collection.
Speaker 5 (07:20):
I saved them all summer.
Speaker 8 (07:22):
Well dump them carefully, bud.
Speaker 9 (07:25):
Okay, and don't right them, mother, My arms are falling off.
Speaker 7 (07:31):
All right, dear, we're going right here.
Speaker 8 (07:32):
Let me get this bag through the door, will you.
That's a good girl.
Speaker 7 (07:39):
Oh well, we're home.
Speaker 4 (07:42):
How does it look?
Speaker 7 (07:44):
It looks wonderful, simply wonderful.
Speaker 4 (07:47):
I had missus Neilsen come in last Friday and give
it a good cleaning.
Speaker 7 (07:50):
Oh that was very thoughtful.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
I don't see anything different, do you.
Speaker 7 (07:55):
Mother, No, dear, everything looks just the way it should.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
Whoo gosh, these coats are.
Speaker 9 (08:02):
Heavy, Oh, Betty. You can't just dump them in a
chair like that. You know where they belong.
Speaker 4 (08:06):
Okay, I'll hang them up just a minute, Betty. I've
made a few little changes around the house, just minor changes.
Speaker 7 (08:14):
Jim.
Speaker 4 (08:15):
Well, it's something I've had in mind for quite.
Speaker 8 (08:17):
A few years.
Speaker 4 (08:19):
You see, the way I figure there is much difference
between a home and an office so far as efficiency
is concerned.
Speaker 8 (08:24):
Anyway, Jim, A.
Speaker 9 (08:25):
Home isn't like an office. You can't run them the
same way, of course you can't.
Speaker 8 (08:30):
And whether you see what I've done, everything's.
Speaker 4 (08:32):
Neat and tidy and orderly, the way things ought to be.
Speaker 9 (08:36):
I hope you know what you're doing, all right, Betty,
put the coats in the closet before they get all wrinkled. Oh,
keep out and then see what happened to Bud and Kathy.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
If nothing, half you mind if I raise.
Speaker 4 (08:47):
Something, stop talking and do as you're told. Yeah, Father,
that girl can talk more and say less than any
ten people in Springfield. Jim, but she certainly doesn't get
it from my side of the family.
Speaker 8 (08:57):
I'll tell you that, Jim.
Speaker 4 (08:58):
I've never heard anyone talk so much in my entire life,
all the way down from round Lake talk talk talk, Jim.
Speaker 7 (09:06):
Oh, silent one. Yeah, do you mind if I say something?
Speaker 4 (09:15):
Of course not.
Speaker 8 (09:16):
You know that's a ridiculous question.
Speaker 7 (09:18):
Well I have another ridiculous question. What have you done
to the house.
Speaker 4 (09:23):
I've instituted a little system, that's all.
Speaker 8 (09:25):
And it's about time, mother.
Speaker 4 (09:27):
They're any there, certainly are.
Speaker 8 (09:30):
They're in the box.
Speaker 7 (09:32):
The hangers are in a box.
Speaker 8 (09:34):
That's right.
Speaker 4 (09:35):
There's nothing that looks sillier than a bunch of empty
coat hangers.
Speaker 8 (09:38):
Besides, they don't do anything but catch dust.
Speaker 4 (09:41):
What the box under the box with the goloshes, Jim.
Speaker 9 (09:47):
It's taken me fifteen years to train the children to
hang up their coats.
Speaker 7 (09:52):
And now you've hidden the hangers.
Speaker 4 (09:54):
Oh I haven't. I've put them where they belong. It's
part of the system.
Speaker 7 (09:57):
You haven't rearranged the entire house that way, have you.
Speaker 4 (10:04):
More or less? Oh? Jim, Now, don't get upset, Margaret.
The least you can do is give the system a chance.
Speaker 7 (10:11):
But if you aren't home, we'll never be able to
find anything.
Speaker 4 (10:13):
Yes, you will. I spent a whole week making a catalog.
Everything is entered in its proper place, dishes, silver linen.
Everything's been put away systematically and entered in the catalog.
Speaker 7 (10:30):
Jim Anderson, do you mean it?
Speaker 9 (10:32):
In order to find a plate in the cupboard, I've
got to look it up in a catalog.
Speaker 4 (10:39):
That's right under sea.
Speaker 5 (10:43):
Dishes under sea.
Speaker 4 (10:46):
I filed them under China.
Speaker 7 (10:52):
That is the most ridiculous thing I ever heard.
Speaker 8 (10:54):
It isn't ridiculous at all.
Speaker 4 (10:56):
You've been complaining for years that you haven't had enough closets. Well,
I got through rearranging things. I had two closets left over.
Speaker 9 (11:08):
I'm not going to say a thing, not a single thing,
at this moment.
Speaker 7 (11:12):
I don't dare.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
And there isn't any keys the key is where it
belongs with all the other keys. They're all tagged, labeled
and filed very systematically. Where I wish you'd stop looking
at me that way. I was merely trying to be helpful.
I know it isn't easy to get used to a
(11:37):
new system, but you will stay.
Speaker 7 (11:39):
Dad.
Speaker 6 (11:41):
Here's a letter for you, Dad.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
It was stacial delivery and I signed for it.
Speaker 6 (11:45):
It's from the bank, So I see.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
What do you think a bank would be if they
didn't have a system, they'd be broken a week.
Speaker 7 (11:52):
We're not running a bank.
Speaker 4 (11:54):
No, But when some of the bills come in from
the department stores, No, possible.
Speaker 5 (12:00):
What's the matter?
Speaker 4 (12:01):
Father?
Speaker 7 (12:02):
Is something wrong here?
Speaker 4 (12:03):
I'm not overdrawn? How could I possibly be overdrawn?
Speaker 7 (12:06):
Well, they have a system.
Speaker 8 (12:08):
Margaret, this is not a joking matter.
Speaker 4 (12:11):
The day I left for Round Lake, just a week
ago Friday, I deposited over seven hundred dollars.
Speaker 8 (12:17):
How could I be overdrawn?
Speaker 7 (12:19):
Maybe their system didn't work.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
You're darn right, it didn't work. Just as soon as
I find my checkbook.
Speaker 7 (12:25):
Isn't it in the desk drawers?
Speaker 10 (12:27):
No?
Speaker 8 (12:28):
I uh put it someplace else.
Speaker 7 (12:34):
Part of the reorganization.
Speaker 4 (12:36):
Yes, I put it in a much more logical place,
a very logical place, only I can't remember exactly where.
Speaker 7 (12:46):
Why don't you look it up in the catalogue?
Speaker 9 (12:49):
The catalog, Well that's where you entered everything, isn't it.
Speaker 4 (12:55):
Well, you see, that's what I've been trying to tell you, Margaret.
I was trying to get everything ready for you and
the kids when you got home, and I had the
catalog all finished and everything, But Jim, you didn't uh
huh I lost him. Oh no, best cup of coffee
(13:46):
I ever tasted?
Speaker 11 (13:48):
Tomorrow, right at your table. You can hear that from
the world's greatest coffee experts. Yes, ma'am, he'll be there,
because the world's greatest coffee expert is your husband.
Speaker 12 (14:01):
Now. Naturally, we think we're pretty fair experts.
Speaker 11 (14:04):
After all, our Maxwell House coffee is America's favorite brand.
Speaker 4 (14:09):
But the final.
Speaker 12 (14:10):
Judge is that man of yours.
Speaker 11 (14:13):
And if you'll just put a cup of Maxwell House
in front of him, we're mighty sure you'll hear him say.
Speaker 4 (14:19):
Best coffee I ever tasted. In fact, we'll.
Speaker 12 (14:23):
Give you your money back if he doesn't.
Speaker 11 (14:26):
You see, no coffee's made like Maxwell House, and that's
why no coffee tastes like Maxwell House.
Speaker 12 (14:31):
No other coffee has.
Speaker 11 (14:33):
That famous good to the last drop flavor. Get Maxwell
House tomorrow and serve it to your husband.
Speaker 12 (14:40):
And if he doesn't.
Speaker 11 (14:41):
Say it's the coffee for him, just return the can
an unused portion to us and we'll gladly refund the
price you've paid. You'll find our address right on the
front of that familiar blue tin. So tomorrow see how
much the world's greatest coffee expert enjoy's Maxwell House coffee,
always good to the last drop.
Speaker 4 (15:11):
It's only minutes later in the white frame house on
Maple Street, and the future looks dismal and dark for
the family known as Anderson. Father, with his brilliant new system,
has disorganized the entire household. But it won't be for long.
You know how it is with life. It's always darkest
before the dawns, And though everything may seem quite grim
(15:31):
at the moment, there's really no need to be concerned.
Just hang around for a little while, and gradually things
will get worse.
Speaker 5 (15:40):
Mother, I can find see.
Speaker 8 (15:43):
They're in the basement.
Speaker 7 (15:47):
I know, Jim.
Speaker 9 (15:49):
The first thing we've got to do is find the keys.
We can't live in a house where everything is locked out.
Speaker 4 (15:54):
If I could only remember what I did with the cattalog, all.
Speaker 7 (15:57):
Settle for the keys? Can't you remember where you put them?
Speaker 8 (16:01):
I put them in a drawer.
Speaker 7 (16:03):
Which drawer?
Speaker 4 (16:05):
I don't remember? Anyway, I locked the drawer. So what
good would it do if I did remember?
Speaker 7 (16:14):
You locked the drawer with all the keys in it?
Speaker 4 (16:17):
Well, naturally, then I put that key you somewhere else
where in a towel.
Speaker 8 (16:29):
I think it was a towel. Maybe it was a pillow.
Speaker 7 (16:32):
Case, Jim.
Speaker 4 (16:34):
But it's all written down in the catalog. If we
can find that, they'll be nothing to worry.
Speaker 9 (16:37):
About except trying to get this house back in order again.
Speaker 4 (16:41):
Margaret, there's one thing you refuse to recognize.
Speaker 8 (16:44):
Doing it my way, I.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
Had two closets left over.
Speaker 9 (16:47):
And there's one thing you refuse to recognize. We have
two trunks and five suitcases to unpack.
Speaker 7 (16:54):
How many closets do you think we'll have left over?
Speaker 4 (16:56):
Then?
Speaker 8 (16:58):
Oh, I guess I've forgot about that. Well, anyway, I tried.
Speaker 9 (17:04):
I'm not worried about the closets. At least they're open.
But all those locked drawers and missing keys, what are
we going to do about them?
Speaker 8 (17:11):
We'll have to make a thorough search, that's all.
Speaker 7 (17:14):
But you would not have to get the rest of
the luggage.
Speaker 4 (17:16):
Dear, anytime the doorbell rings, he manages to do something else,
but you said him for it.
Speaker 8 (17:21):
Well, how did I know the bell was going to ring?
Haven't even been home fifteen minutes.
Speaker 4 (17:26):
You'd think people would have the decency to let you
get your hat off before they start ringing the doorbell.
Jim My boy, Oh hello, mister Gribble, Come on in.
Speaker 13 (17:36):
I'm not interrupting anything, am I?
Speaker 4 (17:38):
Oh no, we were just sitting around playing a little
game of button button, who's got the button?
Speaker 7 (17:45):
Uh?
Speaker 4 (17:45):
Yes, jim I got used for you the most wonderful
news you've ever heard.
Speaker 8 (17:51):
It wouldn't have anything to do with a catalog, would it.
Speaker 4 (17:55):
Well that's sort of a key subject around here right now.
I see it's mister Grebble.
Speaker 8 (18:01):
Honey, I can't say very long.
Speaker 4 (18:03):
Just stop buy on my way to the club, sat
the car on the driveway, you know. Oh, hello, missus Anders,
nice to see you back.
Speaker 7 (18:08):
It's nice to be back, that is, it might be
sometime soon.
Speaker 13 (18:15):
Yes, there's no place like home. That's what I always say.
Speaker 4 (18:20):
The old familiar haunts with everything in its place and
a place for everything.
Speaker 7 (18:24):
Isn't it? The truth.
Speaker 4 (18:28):
Is you said something about good news, JP.
Speaker 7 (18:33):
I did.
Speaker 4 (18:34):
Oh, yes, I didn't die, Jim, my boy, I've done it, Yes, sir,
after three years, I've finally done it. No, yeah, well
that's great. What did you do? Why? I've gotten the
Springfield Athletic Club to open its membership list.
Speaker 13 (18:49):
Not far, mind, you, just far enough to let you in.
Now what do you think of that?
Speaker 4 (18:54):
The Athletic Club. Oh that's wonderful, JP. It really is,
isn't it, Margaret?
Speaker 7 (18:59):
Oh yes, just goosebumps all over.
Speaker 8 (19:03):
I'm finally going to get into the Athletic Club.
Speaker 13 (19:05):
Well, I've got to get down there right away.
Speaker 4 (19:07):
So if you just let me have a check for
one hundred and twenty five dollars a check for your application,
My boy, I want to get it in before they
changed their minds.
Speaker 8 (19:15):
You want me to give you a check?
Speaker 13 (19:19):
What's the matter with you, Jim? Don't you want to join?
Speaker 7 (19:21):
Oh?
Speaker 8 (19:22):
Yes, I wanted to join for the last five years.
Speaker 4 (19:25):
Well, then stop staring at me like a congenital marrow
and give me a check for one hundred and twenty
five dollars. A check for one hundred and twenty five dollars,
mister Gribble, we might as well tell you I left
my check book at the office. That's what we wanted
to say, wasn't it, Margaret.
Speaker 7 (19:42):
I guess so, dear. If that's what you.
Speaker 4 (19:45):
Say, well, there's nothing criminal about that, of course not.
I I'll drop by the bank first thing in the morning,
and then I'll leave a check at your office. I'll
that be Oh, that won't be necessary. It won't be
any trouble, JP. And I don't think it's right for
you to lay out all that money. Who said anything
about that? You bank with the merchants, don't you. Well,
(20:06):
here's one of my blank checks.
Speaker 13 (20:08):
You can use that.
Speaker 8 (20:09):
Oh well, is that you, Bud?
Speaker 6 (20:13):
I guess so.
Speaker 8 (20:16):
Well, come on in, Bud.
Speaker 4 (20:17):
Mister Gribble's here, Jim.
Speaker 13 (20:18):
If you'll just make out a check for one hundred
and twenty five dollars, I want you.
Speaker 8 (20:21):
To meet Bud. JP.
Speaker 4 (20:22):
He's a fine boy.
Speaker 13 (20:23):
I met George Sodden when he was two years old.
Speaker 8 (20:26):
Now just make out a check, Bud. You know, mister Gribble,
don't you sure?
Speaker 4 (20:31):
I'm mister Gribble. I'm beginning to wonder. Mister Gribble is
a great baseball fan, Bud. Why don't the two of
you talk about baseball while I get on the phone.
Speaker 13 (20:41):
I don't know one other the baseball back from the other.
All I want. Look, I'll make out the check and
all you have to do is sign it.
Speaker 4 (20:48):
How will that be?
Speaker 7 (20:49):
Oh?
Speaker 8 (20:50):
That'll be fine, just fine.
Speaker 6 (20:53):
I've got all the bags in den. Now can I
go see Joe?
Speaker 12 (20:56):
No?
Speaker 8 (20:57):
I want you to stay here.
Speaker 4 (20:58):
And why don't you get mister Gribble a drink?
Speaker 6 (21:03):
What kind of a drink?
Speaker 8 (21:05):
Any kind of a drink? Water, anything? I don't care.
How about a nice glass of water?
Speaker 12 (21:08):
JP?
Speaker 13 (21:10):
Thank you?
Speaker 4 (21:10):
No, go ahead, Bud, get mister Gribble a glass of water.
Speaker 6 (21:14):
He doesn't want any.
Speaker 8 (21:17):
We'll get it for him anyway.
Speaker 7 (21:19):
Holy call.
Speaker 13 (21:21):
All right, Jim, it's made out.
Speaker 4 (21:23):
Now.
Speaker 13 (21:23):
All you have to do is sign.
Speaker 4 (21:25):
Yes, Betty Kathy. Mister Gribble is here, Jim.
Speaker 7 (21:29):
Why don't you just tell him?
Speaker 4 (21:31):
Betty Kathy? Can't you hear me?
Speaker 8 (21:35):
I just told you mister Gribble is here?
Speaker 5 (21:37):
Good for here?
Speaker 8 (21:40):
Well?
Speaker 4 (21:40):
Don't you want to say hello hello mister Gribble? Hello Betty?
Speaker 8 (21:47):
How about Kathy?
Speaker 4 (21:48):
Hello, mister Hello Kathy.
Speaker 7 (21:52):
Friendly little group, aren't.
Speaker 12 (21:55):
Jim.
Speaker 4 (21:56):
Why don't you come down and tell mister Gribble all
about the nice summer you have, Jim, tell him all
about it, one day at a time, Jim, never mind
the keys, never mind Missus Neilson, Jim, mister Gribble, never mind,
mister Gribble.
Speaker 6 (22:18):
I guess I'll be running along.
Speaker 4 (22:19):
No, wait, I haven't signed the check. Oh you remember that.
Speaker 7 (22:28):
I'm sure, mister Gribble.
Speaker 8 (22:30):
Okay, I'll just sign it. Well, here you are, JP,
and thank you very much, not at all.
Speaker 13 (22:36):
It'll be nice having you in the club.
Speaker 4 (22:39):
I imagine.
Speaker 8 (22:43):
I'll take you to the door.
Speaker 13 (22:45):
Goodbye, Missus Anderson.
Speaker 7 (22:46):
Goodbye, mister Gribble. I'm sorry everything was so upset.
Speaker 4 (22:50):
That's quite all right, Quite all right, Jim, my boy. Yes, JP,
when you come down to the club, I take things for.
Speaker 7 (23:00):
A few weeks.
Speaker 4 (23:02):
Oh you were, shouldn't have been overdoing things a little.
Speaker 8 (23:07):
I know what you mean. JP.
Speaker 4 (23:09):
I'll be careful.
Speaker 13 (23:10):
Well, I'll be running along.
Speaker 8 (23:12):
Thanks again for everything.
Speaker 13 (23:13):
Oh not at all, my boy, glad the help.
Speaker 4 (23:17):
Well, I've joined something, the Athletic Club or Levenworth one
of the tea.
Speaker 7 (23:26):
Jim, what on earth were you trying to do?
Speaker 8 (23:28):
I don't know, Margaret.
Speaker 4 (23:29):
I thought if I could get Bill Morris on the
phone about that deposit I made.
Speaker 9 (23:33):
But why didn't you tell mister Gribble the truth? I'm
sure he'd have understood.
Speaker 4 (23:37):
I couldn't, Margaret. Would you trust all your insurance to
a man who can't keep his bank account straight?
Speaker 7 (23:42):
I thought the bank made the mistake.
Speaker 8 (23:44):
They did, I mean I think they did. I don't know.
Speaker 10 (23:47):
Here's the water, Dad, What water? You said to get
a glass of water for mister Gribble?
Speaker 8 (24:00):
Well he's gone.
Speaker 4 (24:02):
What do I do with the water?
Speaker 8 (24:08):
Drink it?
Speaker 6 (24:10):
I'm not thirsty, and.
Speaker 4 (24:13):
Take it outside and water the lawn with one glass.
Speaker 7 (24:25):
Jim, you're getting the boy all confused.
Speaker 8 (24:28):
Well what do you think I am?
Speaker 4 (24:30):
No money, no catalog, no keys. Wait a minute, no
what the middle drawer in my desk, that's where I
put it.
Speaker 7 (24:37):
That's where you put what.
Speaker 4 (24:38):
I don't know, but I distinctly remember putting something in it.
The catalog. That's where it is. Come on, Jim, Once
we get the catalog, everything will straightened out. We'll find
the bank book and the keys and uh huh is
it locked.
Speaker 8 (24:55):
Yes, it's locked. Everything's locked. But don't worry. I'll fix this.
Where's the letter open hole?
Speaker 7 (24:59):
Jim ruins, Well, I've.
Speaker 8 (25:01):
Got to get it open there.
Speaker 7 (25:06):
Oh your poor desk.
Speaker 4 (25:09):
You see, I knew I put it someplace. Is it
the catalog, Well not exactly, it's it's the check I
was supposed to deposit.
Speaker 12 (25:36):
Well that solves one mystery.
Speaker 11 (25:38):
But the search for the catalog goes on and on
just goes to show you come out way ahead when
you know where to find what you want. Now, when
it comes to coffee, you want the most for your money,
the most in flavor, the most in enjoyment, and the
world's greatest coffee.
Speaker 12 (25:55):
Expert can help you find it.
Speaker 11 (25:57):
Just serve the number one expert, meaning that husband of
yours a cup of Maxwell House. Then when you see
him smile and hear him say best coffee I ever tasted,
you'll know it's Maxwell House. For your best money's worth.
Get a familiar blue Maxwell House ten tomorrow and see
what that man of yours says about its wonderful, good
(26:19):
to the.
Speaker 12 (26:20):
Last drop flavor.
Speaker 11 (26:22):
Then count all the cups of truly good coffee you
get from that one pound. We think you'll be convinced
you get the most for your money with Maxwell House coffee.
So tomorrow introduce the world's greatest coffee expert to coffee
that's always good to the last drop.
Speaker 7 (26:48):
Again.
Speaker 4 (26:48):
It's moments later in the white frame house on Maple Street,
and only one of the Anderson's many problems has been resolved. Father,
who always knows best, has taken care of the money situation.
But it's mother, the gentle soul, who takes care of
the rest.
Speaker 9 (27:03):
Like this, Jim, We've got to go about this thing logically. Now,
where were you when you finished the catalog?
Speaker 4 (27:12):
Uh? In the kitchen I wound up with the pots
and pans, and then.
Speaker 7 (27:16):
The phone rang.
Speaker 8 (27:17):
How do you know?
Speaker 7 (27:19):
Well? Didn't it?
Speaker 8 (27:20):
Yes?
Speaker 9 (27:20):
But how dear, whenever you lose something, the telephone has
always just rung.
Speaker 8 (27:25):
Well, Uh, then what happened?
Speaker 7 (27:27):
It was Hector Smith, wasn't it?
Speaker 4 (27:29):
Yes?
Speaker 9 (27:30):
But I still don't you and Hector made a poker date.
You had to make a few notes, didn't you.
Speaker 4 (27:34):
That's right.
Speaker 8 (27:35):
I had to put down the address and the.
Speaker 7 (27:36):
Time you also put down the catalog.
Speaker 8 (27:39):
Well, I couldn't write with my handspoke, No.
Speaker 9 (27:41):
Let's see what handy spot would be the most illogical
place for you to put it.
Speaker 4 (27:46):
I put it right on the telephone table and then
it disappeared, Betty.
Speaker 9 (27:52):
Yes, mother, look on top of the valance over the
whole window.
Speaker 4 (27:57):
Margaret, you know that's ridiculous. Who, when he's right, my would.
Speaker 8 (28:00):
Stick a book away on top of a window balance?
Speaker 7 (28:03):
You would?
Speaker 4 (28:05):
I certainly would not, Mother, Yes, Betty, I found the catalog.
Speaker 5 (28:12):
On top of the balance.
Speaker 2 (28:14):
That's right, Thank you, Betty.
Speaker 4 (28:20):
Well, I uh, I guess everything's all straightened out now,
not quite, dear, but it will be as soon as
we put everything back where it was in the beginning.
(28:49):
Life is swell and you keep well. That's why so
many folks eat Post brand flakes for breakfast every day.
Every one ounce serving of these tasty, crisp toasted flakes
provides and to help prevent irregularity due to lack of
bulk in the diet. They're so good and so good
for you too. Ask your grosser for Post forty percent
brand flakes. Remember, life is swell when you keep well
(29:16):
with Post forty percent brand flakes, America's favorite bram Flakes.
Join us again next week when we'll be back with
Father Knows Best, starring Robert Young as Jim Anderson with
Roy Bargee and the Maxwell House Orchestra, and Yours truly.
Speaker 8 (29:37):
Bill Foreman.
Speaker 4 (29:38):
So until next Thursday, good night and good luck from
the makers of Maxwell House. America's favorite brand of coffee,
Always Good to the last drop, Father Knows Best was
transcribed in Hollywood and written by Ed James. Now stay
tuned in for Dragnet, which follows immediately over most of
these stations.
Speaker 8 (30:10):
Theater Guild returned Sunday. Listen next for Dragnet on NBC.
Speaker 1 (30:20):
It's an interesting distinction between the two words and the
two concepts efficient and effective. Something that is efficient may
or may not be effective, and in this case, his
efficient House was not at all effective because it just
(30:44):
didn't work. Please send your questions and comments to host
at Classiccomedy otr dot com. Until next time. In the
words of Samuel Taylor Coleridge, friendship is a sheltering tree.
Welcome to classic comedy of old time radio. I'm your
host Ron Ecklbarger. When Margaret and the kids return home
from spending the summer at Round Lake, they are in
for a surprise, and of course father knows best. This
(00:36):
is episode forty five of Father Knows Best, entitled An
Efficient House. It originally aired on September seventh, nineteen fifty Mother.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
Is Nashville House really the only coffee in the.
Speaker 3 (00:53):
World, Well, your father says so, and your father knows best.
Speaker 4 (01:08):
Yes, its father knows Best. Transcribed in Hollywood starring Robert Young,
His Father's A half hour visit with your neighbors, the Andersons,
brought to you by America's favorite coffee, Maxwell House, the
coffee that's always good to the last drop. If an
(01:37):
arrow rises, it must fall, If a river flows, it
must bend. And be they long or be they small?
All vacations have an air in Springfield, which is still
an average town. Live the Anderson's just an average American
family with the average American trials and tribulations. Their car
is rolling rapidly toward the white frame house on Maple Street,
(02:00):
and as they return from a long summer holiday at
Round Lake, it might be interesting to note the thoughts
which occupy their minds. For instance, there's Kathy aged nine.
Speaker 5 (02:10):
Gee whizz. Next week we have to go.
Speaker 6 (02:13):
Back to school, Bud who is fifteen gosh, next week
we have to go back to school.
Speaker 4 (02:20):
And Betty, who was a very adult seventeen Jonathan creepers.
Speaker 5 (02:24):
Next week we have to go back to school.
Speaker 4 (02:27):
Then, of course there's Margaret, the mother of the broupe.
Speaker 7 (02:30):
Next week the children go back to school.
Speaker 4 (02:36):
Last but by no means least bother himself. Jim Anderson,
Well it won't be long.
Speaker 8 (02:42):
Now here's Maple.
Speaker 5 (02:43):
There's Jimmy Waite.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
Jimmy, Now, will you Bud stop pushing.
Speaker 6 (02:47):
I'm not pushing. Kathy's standing on my foot.
Speaker 7 (02:50):
Kathleen, sit still and behave yourself.
Speaker 5 (02:52):
I'm saying, hello, Jimmy.
Speaker 9 (02:54):
There'll be plenty of time for that. Jim. Are you
sure everything's all right at the house?
Speaker 4 (03:02):
Of course, everything's all right. Why well, you look just.
Speaker 9 (03:05):
Like a boy with his hand in the jam pot.
And if you've done anything.
Speaker 2 (03:09):
Silsy you Oh Kathy sip down, that was silsy. Well
you don't have to jump out the window.
Speaker 6 (03:18):
Look what she did to my shoe.
Speaker 5 (03:20):
I did not.
Speaker 6 (03:21):
You certainly did.
Speaker 5 (03:22):
I certainly didn't.
Speaker 6 (03:24):
You certainly did.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
I certainly didn't. Kathy, would you please stop screeching in
my ear?
Speaker 5 (03:30):
I wasn't screeching in your ear.
Speaker 7 (03:32):
You certainly why?
Speaker 5 (03:34):
Certainly?
Speaker 10 (03:35):
Why?
Speaker 8 (03:37):
All right, that's enough?
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Well, she said, I was screeching in hurry.
Speaker 8 (03:41):
I said that's enough, and I wasn't.
Speaker 6 (03:47):
Hey, here's the house.
Speaker 7 (03:49):
Well that's a relief.
Speaker 8 (03:52):
What do you mean by that?
Speaker 5 (03:53):
Oh?
Speaker 9 (03:54):
Nothing, It's just that when you get that peculiar look
on your face, I never know what to expect. I
thought maybe you had the house pain to purple or something.
Speaker 4 (04:01):
I see here Martin.
Speaker 9 (04:03):
I know you mean well, but whenever the children and
I go away, you get such weird ideas about the house.
Speaker 4 (04:09):
Oh like the barbecue pit I built last summer. I
suppose that was a weird idea.
Speaker 6 (04:14):
No, it was.
Speaker 7 (04:14):
Fine until it fell apart.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
How about the year you decided to turn the playroom
into a.
Speaker 8 (04:20):
Bowling alley never mind?
Speaker 6 (04:23):
Or the year you painted the living room green and
Mom had to send.
Speaker 8 (04:26):
All the fun I said, never mind.
Speaker 6 (04:29):
Oh gosh, I was only trying to help.
Speaker 8 (04:34):
Kathleen. Right after dinner, you go to bed.
Speaker 5 (04:37):
But I didn't say anything.
Speaker 4 (04:40):
I know just what you were thinking, and I won't
stand for it.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
But I wasn't thinking about the fire alarm you built
in the other.
Speaker 8 (04:54):
Well, don't just sit there.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
But we're home.
Speaker 8 (04:56):
Let's get the luggage into the house.
Speaker 4 (04:58):
Okay, Dad, it's a little extra pride in his home.
And what happens people make fun of him, treat him
like the village idiots.
Speaker 7 (05:04):
Oh, Jim, we weren't making fun of you.
Speaker 8 (05:07):
You certainly were.
Speaker 4 (05:08):
You thought I was going to paint the house purple?
Speaker 7 (05:10):
No I didn't, Dear. I merely said, Joe, Hey.
Speaker 4 (05:14):
Joe, come back here. Where do you think you're going?
Speaker 6 (05:16):
I just saw Joe Phillips.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
Well, take a look at the suitcases. They come first.
Holy call, Kathy, that is not where we live.
Speaker 8 (05:26):
This is our house, the white one.
Speaker 9 (05:30):
You can see Patty in the morning. Dear, Right now,
we've all got to help your father.
Speaker 8 (05:35):
Jee wis Well.
Speaker 4 (05:38):
I guess that's about everything, Jim, Margaret has nothing to
worry about it. I haven't done anything to the house,
nothing much anyway.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
Oh, dear Kathy, push the water bottle under my chin.
Speaker 5 (05:51):
It's kippy. Want me to carry it?
Speaker 7 (05:53):
Just push it over a little.
Speaker 5 (05:56):
Why can't I carry it? Kathy? It broke?
Speaker 4 (06:07):
I don't know. People go away all the time and
come home all the time. They don't get into things
like this. Only this family, if.
Speaker 8 (06:13):
We so much as go across the.
Speaker 6 (06:14):
Street, Dad, these bags are getting heavy.
Speaker 8 (06:17):
Well, put them down.
Speaker 6 (06:19):
Don't you want me to take them inside?
Speaker 8 (06:21):
Naturally?
Speaker 4 (06:21):
I want you to take them inside?
Speaker 6 (06:24):
How can I take them inside if I put them down?
Speaker 4 (06:29):
Margaret?
Speaker 7 (06:30):
It's all right there, I have my keys.
Speaker 4 (06:36):
There we are, Kathy, hold the screen door open until
we get in. Yes, see, if you can manage not
to break it.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
Oh, how can you break the screen door?
Speaker 8 (06:45):
I don't know, but don't try to find out. All right,
but let's go.
Speaker 6 (06:52):
I don't think I can make it. This little bag
feels like it's got rocks in it.
Speaker 4 (06:56):
Kathy, What have you gotten your suitcase? Rocks?
Speaker 7 (07:03):
Rocks, special rocks.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
I'm saving them.
Speaker 4 (07:06):
Gods, we haven't got enough rocks in Springfield. She has
to bring a suitcase full of them back from round Leigh.
Speaker 5 (07:13):
They're all different colors, Bud.
Speaker 4 (07:15):
Take them out in back of the garage and dump them.
Speaker 6 (07:17):
Okay, it's practically a collection.
Speaker 5 (07:20):
I saved them all summer.
Speaker 8 (07:22):
Well dump them carefully, bud.
Speaker 9 (07:25):
Okay, and don't right them, mother, My arms are falling off.
Speaker 7 (07:31):
All right, dear, we're going right here.
Speaker 8 (07:32):
Let me get this bag through the door, will you.
That's a good girl.
Speaker 7 (07:39):
Oh well, we're home.
Speaker 4 (07:42):
How does it look?
Speaker 7 (07:44):
It looks wonderful, simply wonderful.
Speaker 4 (07:47):
I had missus Neilsen come in last Friday and give
it a good cleaning.
Speaker 7 (07:50):
Oh that was very thoughtful.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
I don't see anything different, do you.
Speaker 7 (07:55):
Mother, No, dear, everything looks just the way it should.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
Whoo gosh, these coats are.
Speaker 9 (08:02):
Heavy, Oh, Betty. You can't just dump them in a
chair like that. You know where they belong.
Speaker 4 (08:06):
Okay, I'll hang them up just a minute, Betty. I've
made a few little changes around the house, just minor changes.
Speaker 7 (08:14):
Jim.
Speaker 4 (08:15):
Well, it's something I've had in mind for quite.
Speaker 8 (08:17):
A few years.
Speaker 4 (08:19):
You see, the way I figure there is much difference
between a home and an office so far as efficiency
is concerned.
Speaker 8 (08:24):
Anyway, Jim, A.
Speaker 9 (08:25):
Home isn't like an office. You can't run them the
same way, of course you can't.
Speaker 8 (08:30):
And whether you see what I've done, everything's.
Speaker 4 (08:32):
Neat and tidy and orderly, the way things ought to be.
Speaker 9 (08:36):
I hope you know what you're doing, all right, Betty,
put the coats in the closet before they get all wrinkled. Oh,
keep out and then see what happened to Bud and Kathy.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
If nothing, half you mind if I raise.
Speaker 4 (08:47):
Something, stop talking and do as you're told. Yeah, Father,
that girl can talk more and say less than any
ten people in Springfield. Jim, but she certainly doesn't get
it from my side of the family.
Speaker 8 (08:57):
I'll tell you that, Jim.
Speaker 4 (08:58):
I've never heard anyone talk so much in my entire life,
all the way down from round Lake talk talk talk, Jim.
Speaker 7 (09:06):
Oh, silent one. Yeah, do you mind if I say something?
Speaker 4 (09:15):
Of course not.
Speaker 8 (09:16):
You know that's a ridiculous question.
Speaker 7 (09:18):
Well I have another ridiculous question. What have you done
to the house.
Speaker 4 (09:23):
I've instituted a little system, that's all.
Speaker 8 (09:25):
And it's about time, mother.
Speaker 4 (09:27):
They're any there, certainly are.
Speaker 8 (09:30):
They're in the box.
Speaker 7 (09:32):
The hangers are in a box.
Speaker 8 (09:34):
That's right.
Speaker 4 (09:35):
There's nothing that looks sillier than a bunch of empty
coat hangers.
Speaker 8 (09:38):
Besides, they don't do anything but catch dust.
Speaker 4 (09:41):
What the box under the box with the goloshes, Jim.
Speaker 9 (09:47):
It's taken me fifteen years to train the children to
hang up their coats.
Speaker 7 (09:52):
And now you've hidden the hangers.
Speaker 4 (09:54):
Oh I haven't. I've put them where they belong. It's
part of the system.
Speaker 7 (09:57):
You haven't rearranged the entire house that way, have you.
Speaker 4 (10:04):
More or less? Oh? Jim, Now, don't get upset, Margaret.
The least you can do is give the system a chance.
Speaker 7 (10:11):
But if you aren't home, we'll never be able to
find anything.
Speaker 4 (10:13):
Yes, you will. I spent a whole week making a catalog.
Everything is entered in its proper place, dishes, silver linen.
Everything's been put away systematically and entered in the catalog.
Speaker 7 (10:30):
Jim Anderson, do you mean it?
Speaker 9 (10:32):
In order to find a plate in the cupboard, I've
got to look it up in a catalog.
Speaker 4 (10:39):
That's right under sea.
Speaker 5 (10:43):
Dishes under sea.
Speaker 4 (10:46):
I filed them under China.
Speaker 7 (10:52):
That is the most ridiculous thing I ever heard.
Speaker 8 (10:54):
It isn't ridiculous at all.
Speaker 4 (10:56):
You've been complaining for years that you haven't had enough closets. Well,
I got through rearranging things. I had two closets left over.
Speaker 9 (11:08):
I'm not going to say a thing, not a single thing,
at this moment.
Speaker 7 (11:12):
I don't dare.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
And there isn't any keys the key is where it
belongs with all the other keys. They're all tagged, labeled
and filed very systematically. Where I wish you'd stop looking
at me that way. I was merely trying to be helpful.
I know it isn't easy to get used to a
(11:37):
new system, but you will stay.
Speaker 7 (11:39):
Dad.
Speaker 6 (11:41):
Here's a letter for you, Dad.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
It was stacial delivery and I signed for it.
Speaker 6 (11:45):
It's from the bank, So I see.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
What do you think a bank would be if they
didn't have a system, they'd be broken a week.
Speaker 7 (11:52):
We're not running a bank.
Speaker 4 (11:54):
No, But when some of the bills come in from
the department stores, No, possible.
Speaker 5 (12:00):
What's the matter?
Speaker 4 (12:01):
Father?
Speaker 7 (12:02):
Is something wrong here?
Speaker 4 (12:03):
I'm not overdrawn? How could I possibly be overdrawn?
Speaker 7 (12:06):
Well, they have a system.
Speaker 8 (12:08):
Margaret, this is not a joking matter.
Speaker 4 (12:11):
The day I left for Round Lake, just a week
ago Friday, I deposited over seven hundred dollars.
Speaker 8 (12:17):
How could I be overdrawn?
Speaker 7 (12:19):
Maybe their system didn't work.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
You're darn right, it didn't work. Just as soon as
I find my checkbook.
Speaker 7 (12:25):
Isn't it in the desk drawers?
Speaker 10 (12:27):
No?
Speaker 8 (12:28):
I uh put it someplace else.
Speaker 7 (12:34):
Part of the reorganization.
Speaker 4 (12:36):
Yes, I put it in a much more logical place,
a very logical place, only I can't remember exactly where.
Speaker 7 (12:46):
Why don't you look it up in the catalogue?
Speaker 9 (12:49):
The catalog, Well that's where you entered everything, isn't it.
Speaker 4 (12:55):
Well, you see, that's what I've been trying to tell you, Margaret.
I was trying to get everything ready for you and
the kids when you got home, and I had the
catalog all finished and everything, But Jim, you didn't uh
huh I lost him. Oh no, best cup of coffee
(13:46):
I ever tasted?
Speaker 11 (13:48):
Tomorrow, right at your table. You can hear that from
the world's greatest coffee experts. Yes, ma'am, he'll be there,
because the world's greatest coffee expert is your husband.
Speaker 12 (14:01):
Now. Naturally, we think we're pretty fair experts.
Speaker 11 (14:04):
After all, our Maxwell House coffee is America's favorite brand.
Speaker 4 (14:09):
But the final.
Speaker 12 (14:10):
Judge is that man of yours.
Speaker 11 (14:13):
And if you'll just put a cup of Maxwell House
in front of him, we're mighty sure you'll hear him say.
Speaker 4 (14:19):
Best coffee I ever tasted. In fact, we'll.
Speaker 12 (14:23):
Give you your money back if he doesn't.
Speaker 11 (14:26):
You see, no coffee's made like Maxwell House, and that's
why no coffee tastes like Maxwell House.
Speaker 12 (14:31):
No other coffee has.
Speaker 11 (14:33):
That famous good to the last drop flavor. Get Maxwell
House tomorrow and serve it to your husband.
Speaker 12 (14:40):
And if he doesn't.
Speaker 11 (14:41):
Say it's the coffee for him, just return the can
an unused portion to us and we'll gladly refund the
price you've paid. You'll find our address right on the
front of that familiar blue tin. So tomorrow see how
much the world's greatest coffee expert enjoy's Maxwell House coffee,
always good to the last drop.
Speaker 4 (15:11):
It's only minutes later in the white frame house on
Maple Street, and the future looks dismal and dark for
the family known as Anderson. Father, with his brilliant new system,
has disorganized the entire household. But it won't be for long.
You know how it is with life. It's always darkest
before the dawns, And though everything may seem quite grim
(15:31):
at the moment, there's really no need to be concerned.
Just hang around for a little while, and gradually things
will get worse.
Speaker 5 (15:40):
Mother, I can find see.
Speaker 8 (15:43):
They're in the basement.
Speaker 7 (15:47):
I know, Jim.
Speaker 9 (15:49):
The first thing we've got to do is find the keys.
We can't live in a house where everything is locked out.
Speaker 4 (15:54):
If I could only remember what I did with the cattalog, all.
Speaker 7 (15:57):
Settle for the keys? Can't you remember where you put them?
Speaker 8 (16:01):
I put them in a drawer.
Speaker 7 (16:03):
Which drawer?
Speaker 4 (16:05):
I don't remember? Anyway, I locked the drawer. So what
good would it do if I did remember?
Speaker 7 (16:14):
You locked the drawer with all the keys in it?
Speaker 4 (16:17):
Well, naturally, then I put that key you somewhere else
where in a towel.
Speaker 8 (16:29):
I think it was a towel. Maybe it was a pillow.
Speaker 7 (16:32):
Case, Jim.
Speaker 4 (16:34):
But it's all written down in the catalog. If we
can find that, they'll be nothing to worry.
Speaker 9 (16:37):
About except trying to get this house back in order again.
Speaker 4 (16:41):
Margaret, there's one thing you refuse to recognize.
Speaker 8 (16:44):
Doing it my way, I.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
Had two closets left over.
Speaker 9 (16:47):
And there's one thing you refuse to recognize. We have
two trunks and five suitcases to unpack.
Speaker 7 (16:54):
How many closets do you think we'll have left over?
Speaker 4 (16:56):
Then?
Speaker 8 (16:58):
Oh, I guess I've forgot about that. Well, anyway, I tried.
Speaker 9 (17:04):
I'm not worried about the closets. At least they're open.
But all those locked drawers and missing keys, what are
we going to do about them?
Speaker 8 (17:11):
We'll have to make a thorough search, that's all.
Speaker 7 (17:14):
But you would not have to get the rest of
the luggage.
Speaker 4 (17:16):
Dear, anytime the doorbell rings, he manages to do something else,
but you said him for it.
Speaker 8 (17:21):
Well, how did I know the bell was going to ring?
Haven't even been home fifteen minutes.
Speaker 4 (17:26):
You'd think people would have the decency to let you
get your hat off before they start ringing the doorbell.
Jim My boy, Oh hello, mister Gribble, Come on in.
Speaker 13 (17:36):
I'm not interrupting anything, am I?
Speaker 4 (17:38):
Oh no, we were just sitting around playing a little
game of button button, who's got the button?
Speaker 7 (17:45):
Uh?
Speaker 4 (17:45):
Yes, jim I got used for you the most wonderful
news you've ever heard.
Speaker 8 (17:51):
It wouldn't have anything to do with a catalog, would it.
Speaker 4 (17:55):
Well that's sort of a key subject around here right now.
I see it's mister Grebble.
Speaker 8 (18:01):
Honey, I can't say very long.
Speaker 4 (18:03):
Just stop buy on my way to the club, sat
the car on the driveway, you know. Oh, hello, missus Anders,
nice to see you back.
Speaker 7 (18:08):
It's nice to be back, that is, it might be
sometime soon.
Speaker 13 (18:15):
Yes, there's no place like home. That's what I always say.
Speaker 4 (18:20):
The old familiar haunts with everything in its place and
a place for everything.
Speaker 7 (18:24):
Isn't it? The truth.
Speaker 4 (18:28):
Is you said something about good news, JP.
Speaker 7 (18:33):
I did.
Speaker 4 (18:34):
Oh, yes, I didn't die, Jim, my boy, I've done it, Yes, sir,
after three years, I've finally done it. No, yeah, well
that's great. What did you do? Why? I've gotten the
Springfield Athletic Club to open its membership list.
Speaker 13 (18:49):
Not far, mind, you, just far enough to let you in.
Now what do you think of that?
Speaker 4 (18:54):
The Athletic Club. Oh that's wonderful, JP. It really is,
isn't it, Margaret?
Speaker 7 (18:59):
Oh yes, just goosebumps all over.
Speaker 8 (19:03):
I'm finally going to get into the Athletic Club.
Speaker 13 (19:05):
Well, I've got to get down there right away.
Speaker 4 (19:07):
So if you just let me have a check for
one hundred and twenty five dollars a check for your application,
My boy, I want to get it in before they
changed their minds.
Speaker 8 (19:15):
You want me to give you a check?
Speaker 13 (19:19):
What's the matter with you, Jim? Don't you want to join?
Speaker 7 (19:21):
Oh?
Speaker 8 (19:22):
Yes, I wanted to join for the last five years.
Speaker 4 (19:25):
Well, then stop staring at me like a congenital marrow
and give me a check for one hundred and twenty
five dollars. A check for one hundred and twenty five dollars,
mister Gribble, we might as well tell you I left
my check book at the office. That's what we wanted
to say, wasn't it, Margaret.
Speaker 7 (19:42):
I guess so, dear. If that's what you.
Speaker 4 (19:45):
Say, well, there's nothing criminal about that, of course not.
I I'll drop by the bank first thing in the morning,
and then I'll leave a check at your office. I'll
that be Oh, that won't be necessary. It won't be
any trouble, JP. And I don't think it's right for
you to lay out all that money. Who said anything
about that? You bank with the merchants, don't you. Well,
(20:06):
here's one of my blank checks.
Speaker 13 (20:08):
You can use that.
Speaker 8 (20:09):
Oh well, is that you, Bud?
Speaker 6 (20:13):
I guess so.
Speaker 8 (20:16):
Well, come on in, Bud.
Speaker 4 (20:17):
Mister Gribble's here, Jim.
Speaker 13 (20:18):
If you'll just make out a check for one hundred
and twenty five dollars, I want you.
Speaker 8 (20:21):
To meet Bud. JP.
Speaker 4 (20:22):
He's a fine boy.
Speaker 13 (20:23):
I met George Sodden when he was two years old.
Speaker 8 (20:26):
Now just make out a check, Bud. You know, mister Gribble,
don't you sure?
Speaker 4 (20:31):
I'm mister Gribble. I'm beginning to wonder. Mister Gribble is
a great baseball fan, Bud. Why don't the two of
you talk about baseball while I get on the phone.
Speaker 13 (20:41):
I don't know one other the baseball back from the other.
All I want. Look, I'll make out the check and
all you have to do is sign it.
Speaker 4 (20:48):
How will that be?
Speaker 7 (20:49):
Oh?
Speaker 8 (20:50):
That'll be fine, just fine.
Speaker 6 (20:53):
I've got all the bags in den. Now can I
go see Joe?
Speaker 12 (20:56):
No?
Speaker 8 (20:57):
I want you to stay here.
Speaker 4 (20:58):
And why don't you get mister Gribble a drink?
Speaker 6 (21:03):
What kind of a drink?
Speaker 8 (21:05):
Any kind of a drink? Water, anything? I don't care.
How about a nice glass of water?
Speaker 12 (21:08):
JP?
Speaker 13 (21:10):
Thank you?
Speaker 4 (21:10):
No, go ahead, Bud, get mister Gribble a glass of water.
Speaker 6 (21:14):
He doesn't want any.
Speaker 8 (21:17):
We'll get it for him anyway.
Speaker 7 (21:19):
Holy call.
Speaker 13 (21:21):
All right, Jim, it's made out.
Speaker 4 (21:23):
Now.
Speaker 13 (21:23):
All you have to do is sign.
Speaker 4 (21:25):
Yes, Betty Kathy. Mister Gribble is here, Jim.
Speaker 7 (21:29):
Why don't you just tell him?
Speaker 4 (21:31):
Betty Kathy? Can't you hear me?
Speaker 8 (21:35):
I just told you mister Gribble is here?
Speaker 5 (21:37):
Good for here?
Speaker 8 (21:40):
Well?
Speaker 4 (21:40):
Don't you want to say hello hello mister Gribble? Hello Betty?
Speaker 8 (21:47):
How about Kathy?
Speaker 4 (21:48):
Hello, mister Hello Kathy.
Speaker 7 (21:52):
Friendly little group, aren't.
Speaker 12 (21:55):
Jim.
Speaker 4 (21:56):
Why don't you come down and tell mister Gribble all
about the nice summer you have, Jim, tell him all
about it, one day at a time, Jim, never mind
the keys, never mind Missus Neilson, Jim, mister Gribble, never mind,
mister Gribble.
Speaker 6 (22:18):
I guess I'll be running along.
Speaker 4 (22:19):
No, wait, I haven't signed the check. Oh you remember that.
Speaker 7 (22:28):
I'm sure, mister Gribble.
Speaker 8 (22:30):
Okay, I'll just sign it. Well, here you are, JP,
and thank you very much, not at all.
Speaker 13 (22:36):
It'll be nice having you in the club.
Speaker 4 (22:39):
I imagine.
Speaker 8 (22:43):
I'll take you to the door.
Speaker 13 (22:45):
Goodbye, Missus Anderson.
Speaker 7 (22:46):
Goodbye, mister Gribble. I'm sorry everything was so upset.
Speaker 4 (22:50):
That's quite all right, Quite all right, Jim, my boy. Yes, JP,
when you come down to the club, I take things for.
Speaker 7 (23:00):
A few weeks.
Speaker 4 (23:02):
Oh you were, shouldn't have been overdoing things a little.
Speaker 8 (23:07):
I know what you mean. JP.
Speaker 4 (23:09):
I'll be careful.
Speaker 13 (23:10):
Well, I'll be running along.
Speaker 8 (23:12):
Thanks again for everything.
Speaker 13 (23:13):
Oh not at all, my boy, glad the help.
Speaker 4 (23:17):
Well, I've joined something, the Athletic Club or Levenworth one
of the tea.
Speaker 7 (23:26):
Jim, what on earth were you trying to do?
Speaker 8 (23:28):
I don't know, Margaret.
Speaker 4 (23:29):
I thought if I could get Bill Morris on the
phone about that deposit I made.
Speaker 9 (23:33):
But why didn't you tell mister Gribble the truth? I'm
sure he'd have understood.
Speaker 4 (23:37):
I couldn't, Margaret. Would you trust all your insurance to
a man who can't keep his bank account straight?
Speaker 7 (23:42):
I thought the bank made the mistake.
Speaker 8 (23:44):
They did, I mean I think they did. I don't know.
Speaker 10 (23:47):
Here's the water, Dad, What water? You said to get
a glass of water for mister Gribble?
Speaker 8 (24:00):
Well he's gone.
Speaker 4 (24:02):
What do I do with the water?
Speaker 8 (24:08):
Drink it?
Speaker 6 (24:10):
I'm not thirsty, and.
Speaker 4 (24:13):
Take it outside and water the lawn with one glass.
Speaker 7 (24:25):
Jim, you're getting the boy all confused.
Speaker 8 (24:28):
Well what do you think I am?
Speaker 4 (24:30):
No money, no catalog, no keys. Wait a minute, no
what the middle drawer in my desk, that's where I
put it.
Speaker 7 (24:37):
That's where you put what.
Speaker 4 (24:38):
I don't know, but I distinctly remember putting something in it.
The catalog. That's where it is. Come on, Jim, Once
we get the catalog, everything will straightened out. We'll find
the bank book and the keys and uh huh is
it locked.
Speaker 8 (24:55):
Yes, it's locked. Everything's locked. But don't worry. I'll fix this.
Where's the letter open hole?
Speaker 7 (24:59):
Jim ruins, Well, I've.
Speaker 8 (25:01):
Got to get it open there.
Speaker 7 (25:06):
Oh your poor desk.
Speaker 4 (25:09):
You see, I knew I put it someplace. Is it
the catalog, Well not exactly, it's it's the check I
was supposed to deposit.
Speaker 12 (25:36):
Well that solves one mystery.
Speaker 11 (25:38):
But the search for the catalog goes on and on
just goes to show you come out way ahead when
you know where to find what you want. Now, when
it comes to coffee, you want the most for your money,
the most in flavor, the most in enjoyment, and the
world's greatest coffee.
Speaker 12 (25:55):
Expert can help you find it.
Speaker 11 (25:57):
Just serve the number one expert, meaning that husband of
yours a cup of Maxwell House. Then when you see
him smile and hear him say best coffee I ever tasted,
you'll know it's Maxwell House. For your best money's worth.
Get a familiar blue Maxwell House ten tomorrow and see
what that man of yours says about its wonderful, good
(26:19):
to the.
Speaker 12 (26:20):
Last drop flavor.
Speaker 11 (26:22):
Then count all the cups of truly good coffee you
get from that one pound. We think you'll be convinced
you get the most for your money with Maxwell House coffee.
So tomorrow introduce the world's greatest coffee expert to coffee
that's always good to the last drop.
Speaker 7 (26:48):
Again.
Speaker 4 (26:48):
It's moments later in the white frame house on Maple Street,
and only one of the Anderson's many problems has been resolved. Father,
who always knows best, has taken care of the money situation.
But it's mother, the gentle soul, who takes care of
the rest.
Speaker 9 (27:03):
Like this, Jim, We've got to go about this thing logically. Now,
where were you when you finished the catalog?
Speaker 4 (27:12):
Uh? In the kitchen I wound up with the pots
and pans, and then.
Speaker 7 (27:16):
The phone rang.
Speaker 8 (27:17):
How do you know?
Speaker 7 (27:19):
Well? Didn't it?
Speaker 8 (27:20):
Yes?
Speaker 9 (27:20):
But how dear, whenever you lose something, the telephone has
always just rung.
Speaker 8 (27:25):
Well, Uh, then what happened?
Speaker 7 (27:27):
It was Hector Smith, wasn't it?
Speaker 4 (27:29):
Yes?
Speaker 9 (27:30):
But I still don't you and Hector made a poker date.
You had to make a few notes, didn't you.
Speaker 4 (27:34):
That's right.
Speaker 8 (27:35):
I had to put down the address and the.
Speaker 7 (27:36):
Time you also put down the catalog.
Speaker 8 (27:39):
Well, I couldn't write with my handspoke, No.
Speaker 9 (27:41):
Let's see what handy spot would be the most illogical
place for you to put it.
Speaker 4 (27:46):
I put it right on the telephone table and then
it disappeared, Betty.
Speaker 9 (27:52):
Yes, mother, look on top of the valance over the
whole window.
Speaker 4 (27:57):
Margaret, you know that's ridiculous. Who, when he's right, my would.
Speaker 8 (28:00):
Stick a book away on top of a window balance?
Speaker 7 (28:03):
You would?
Speaker 4 (28:05):
I certainly would not, Mother, Yes, Betty, I found the catalog.
Speaker 5 (28:12):
On top of the balance.
Speaker 2 (28:14):
That's right, Thank you, Betty.
Speaker 4 (28:20):
Well, I uh, I guess everything's all straightened out now,
not quite, dear, but it will be as soon as
we put everything back where it was in the beginning.
(28:49):
Life is swell and you keep well. That's why so
many folks eat Post brand flakes for breakfast every day.
Every one ounce serving of these tasty, crisp toasted flakes
provides and to help prevent irregularity due to lack of
bulk in the diet. They're so good and so good
for you too. Ask your grosser for Post forty percent
brand flakes. Remember, life is swell when you keep well
(29:16):
with Post forty percent brand flakes, America's favorite bram Flakes.
Join us again next week when we'll be back with
Father Knows Best, starring Robert Young as Jim Anderson with
Roy Bargee and the Maxwell House Orchestra, and Yours truly.
Speaker 8 (29:37):
Bill Foreman.
Speaker 4 (29:38):
So until next Thursday, good night and good luck from
the makers of Maxwell House. America's favorite brand of coffee,
Always Good to the last drop, Father Knows Best was
transcribed in Hollywood and written by Ed James. Now stay
tuned in for Dragnet, which follows immediately over most of
these stations.
Speaker 8 (30:10):
Theater Guild returned Sunday. Listen next for Dragnet on NBC.
Speaker 1 (30:20):
It's an interesting distinction between the two words and the
two concepts efficient and effective. Something that is efficient may
or may not be effective, and in this case, his
efficient House was not at all effective because it just
(30:44):
didn't work. Please send your questions and comments to host
at Classiccomedy otr dot com. Until next time. In the
words of Samuel Taylor Coleridge, friendship is a sheltering tree.
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