October 16, 2025 • 30 mins
After hearing Father rant and rave about the Mayor, Kathy decides to write a letter to his honor letting him know exactly what her Father thinks about him.
We are skipping over two episodes of Father Knows Best so that we can air them in a couple of months during Christmas and New Years, as they are holiday themed episodes.
Originally aired on January 4, 1951. This is episode 63 of Father Knows Best.
Please email questions and comments to host@classiccomedyotr.com.
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We are skipping over two episodes of Father Knows Best so that we can air them in a couple of months during Christmas and New Years, as they are holiday themed episodes.
Originally aired on January 4, 1951. This is episode 63 of Father Knows Best.
Please email questions and comments to host@classiccomedyotr.com.
Like us on Facebook at facebook.com/classiccomedyotr. Please share this podcast with your friends and family.
You can also subscribe to our podcast on Spreaker.com, Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, and Google podcasts.
This show is supported by Spreaker Prime.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Welcome to classic comedy of old time radio. I'm your host,
Ron Ecklebarger. After hearing Father rant and rave about the mayor,
Kathy decides to write a letter to his honor, letting
him know exactly what her father thinks about him. Now,
I want to let you know we are skipping over
two episodes of Father Knows Best so that we can
(00:37):
air them in a couple of months during Christmas and
New Year's as they are holiday themed episodes. For now,
this is episode number sixty three of Father Knows Best,
entitled Taking on City Hall. It originally aired on January fourth,
nineteen fifty one.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Mother's Natsville House really the only coffee in.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
The world where your father says so and your father
knows best.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
Yes, it's Father Knows Best, transcribed in Hollywood, starring Robert
Young as Father. A half hour visit with your neighbors,
the Andersons, brought to you by America's favorite coffee, Maxwell House,
the coffee That's always good to the last drop. In
(01:43):
speaking of children, the poet Charles M. Dickinson wrote, they
are idols of hearts and of households. They are angels
of God in disguise The sunlight still sleeps in their tresses,
his glory still gleams in their eyes. Well, it seems
like a pretty good bet that mister Dickinson never spent
any appreciable time in Springfield, especially in a certain white
(02:06):
frame house on Maple Street. If he did, it's a
cinch that he never stayed for dinner, where the conversation
generally goes something like this, But Dad, I.
Speaker 5 (02:15):
Won't get my allowance until Monday, and I've only got
twenty cents.
Speaker 4 (02:19):
That's very interesting, Kathy stopped playing with your mashed potatoes.
Speaker 5 (02:24):
Yes, Daddy, it isn't as if I needed a whole lot. Heck,
what's fifty cents?
Speaker 4 (02:30):
Well, lately i've heard it referred to as a nineteen
fifty nickel. That was a joke, Margaret, fifty cents nineteen
fifty nickel?
Speaker 6 (02:39):
You see, I heard you, Jim Oh, I.
Speaker 4 (02:45):
Just thought, Bud, will you please pass the bread?
Speaker 5 (02:49):
Gosh, if you needed fifty cents and I had fifty cents,
you know I'd be only too glad to lend it
to you.
Speaker 4 (02:56):
That's very noble of you.
Speaker 5 (02:57):
You mean I can have it?
Speaker 4 (02:59):
No, that's wonderful, gravy, Margaret, would you mind passing it, Betty?
Speaker 3 (03:05):
Please here you are, father, thank you?
Speaker 4 (03:08):
Say Mom, your mother's not going to lend you the
fifty cents either, Bud, so stop bothering her.
Speaker 5 (03:12):
I wasn't bothering her, Dad.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
I just thought, and if Bud really needs the money.
Speaker 4 (03:16):
This is Thursday, Margarety. God, he's allowance only three days ago.
Speaker 5 (03:19):
Well, how did I know she was going to be
a pig?
Speaker 4 (03:24):
Who Marion Swift?
Speaker 5 (03:26):
Believe me, it'll be a long time before I invite
her in for another All all I said was would
you like them all? And you know what?
Speaker 4 (03:34):
She ordered?
Speaker 5 (03:35):
A triple deca sandwich and a hut Fudge Sunday with nuts.
Speaker 4 (03:43):
That is one of the unfortunate things about life, Bud.
All women are born hungry, why Jim, especially beautiful women.
Speaker 5 (03:55):
I hope she gets a stomach ache.
Speaker 4 (03:56):
But teacher Kathy, if you're quite finished with that construction job,
may I suggest that you put your potatoes to the
use for which they were intended. Huh eat your dinner?
Speaker 7 (04:09):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (04:10):
Oh? What?
Speaker 7 (04:11):
Okay?
Speaker 4 (04:16):
Go ahead, dear say Betty.
Speaker 7 (04:18):
Don't ask me for any money.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
I'm broke.
Speaker 7 (04:21):
She wouldn't even give any to Billy Smith.
Speaker 4 (04:23):
Kathy, wait, a minute. You mean Billy Smith asked you
for money?
Speaker 7 (04:28):
Well, he said he needed eighty cents in a hurry.
Speaker 4 (04:30):
What's gotten into these kids anyway? Imagine a boy asking
a girl for money.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
Well, they've been friends for such a long time.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
It's outrageous, That's what it is. Just plain outrageous.
Speaker 7 (04:41):
I think it is too creepers.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
It's only been three days since I borrowed it from him.
Speaker 7 (04:51):
What were you saying, Jim?
Speaker 4 (04:53):
I uh, I was just how are you getting along
in school these days? Kathy?
Speaker 7 (04:59):
Oh? Pretty good?
Speaker 5 (05:01):
How about thirty cents?
Speaker 4 (05:03):
That isn't much, But please, I was talking to your sister.
What were you saying about school, Kathy?
Speaker 7 (05:09):
I wasn't saying anything.
Speaker 4 (05:11):
Well, say something about anything.
Speaker 7 (05:17):
Okay.
Speaker 8 (05:19):
I didn't win the spelling contest today, Well that's nice.
Speaker 4 (05:24):
Was there anything else you didn't win?
Speaker 8 (05:26):
Well, how did I know there wasn't any? K In civics,
I don't even know what civics are. You don't know
what civics is, That's what I said. You said you
don't know what civics are.
Speaker 7 (05:39):
Well, I don't, Kathy.
Speaker 4 (05:44):
The point Betty is trying to make is that civics
is in the singular, not the plural.
Speaker 7 (05:49):
They are.
Speaker 4 (05:53):
Not they are? They is? I mean it is? What
is civics is, Kathy, Civics is a noun, and there's
just one one. Civics like Yonkers, there's only one Yonkers.
Speaker 7 (06:14):
Why are they?
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Yunkers is a town. It's a place where people live.
Why because they Kathleen, eat your dinner.
Speaker 7 (06:26):
But you didn't tell me.
Speaker 4 (06:27):
I said, eat your dinner, Jim.
Speaker 3 (06:29):
I think you're being very unreasonable. Why don't you tell
Kathy what she wants to know?
Speaker 4 (06:33):
I did tell her. I told her civics was a
singular noun. What more is there to tell?
Speaker 3 (06:37):
You can tell her what civics are or is?
Speaker 9 (06:42):
Well?
Speaker 4 (06:42):
All right, Kathy, civics is it's the uh Dad, it's
from the Latin. Uh what do you call it? Which
means citizen? And uh? You see, Kathy, the government is
divided up into certain groups and other groups. Now, the
government has a certain responsibility to the people, and the
(07:04):
people have a certain responsibility to the government. Which is
the way it should be, isn't it?
Speaker 7 (07:09):
Dan?
Speaker 4 (07:10):
But will you please Keith still, I'm trying to explain
civics to Kathy.
Speaker 5 (07:14):
Civics is that department of political science dealing with the
rights of citizenship and the duties of.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
Citizens, which is exactly what I just thin he's saying,
isn't it, Betty? Word for a word, Well, it meant
the same thing. Maybe I don't remember the formal definition,
but I certainly know the practical application of the word.
And that's what Kathy's really interested in, isn't it, Kathy?
Speaker 3 (07:39):
It is.
Speaker 4 (07:42):
Take well, take Springfield for example. We know that we
have a mayor, a city assembly, and the usual city employees.
Now each of these is a public servant, and his
principal duty is to protect the rights and privileges of
the people. That's clear, isn't it. Jim.
Speaker 3 (07:56):
I'm sure that Kathy doesn't care about Margaret.
Speaker 4 (07:58):
This is very interesting. What was that, Betty?
Speaker 2 (08:02):
I was just clearing my throat father, so I can
listen better.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
It's high time his family took a little interest in
something other than boyfriends in the price of hot fudge Sundays.
But I didn't mind, Bud. I'm explaining about civics, and
it's very interesting, isn't it, Kathy. Oh? Sure, that's up
to the citizens of every community to see that their
rights are protected. That's why we have elections to keep
the public servants on their toes. I take the mayor
(08:32):
for example. If we think the mayor is doing a
bad job, we don't vote for him again. We throw
him out, put somebody else in beddy.
Speaker 3 (08:39):
We'd better start clearing the table.
Speaker 7 (08:41):
Okay.
Speaker 4 (08:42):
Anytime a public servant thinks he's bigger than the people,
well that's the time to watch out. I take this
new highway. What right do they have to tear down
the old meeting hall for a new highway? That's what
I want to know.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
Don't take the cake, mom, all right, dear, I don't.
Speaker 4 (08:56):
Mind progress, but there's such a thing as sentiment. That
building is a monument and it holds precious memories for
everyone in Springfield. But do they care. No, they're going
to tear it down build a road. And they didn't
even have the decency to ask the people if that's
what they wanted.
Speaker 3 (09:13):
Margaret, go ahead, we're listening.
Speaker 4 (09:16):
We've taken just about all we're going to take from
that bunch of incompetence in the city Hall. After the
next election, they'll be out selling pencils on the street corners.
And if they think, Kathy, will you please stop fidgeting.
Speaker 7 (09:28):
But I don't understand something.
Speaker 4 (09:30):
Well, I've made it perfectly clear.
Speaker 7 (09:32):
I know.
Speaker 9 (09:32):
But what are yunkers.
Speaker 5 (09:47):
For crying out loud? Kathy? You can trust me, can't you.
Speaker 8 (09:51):
You said you'd give it back to me on Monday,
and this is Monday.
Speaker 5 (09:55):
But you don't need the quarter. I do too, Look, Kathy,
don't you just let me pay you the interest?
Speaker 7 (10:02):
I want my quarter and.
Speaker 5 (10:04):
Next Monday I'll give you the quarter and another nickel
for interest.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
I want my quarter of all the stubborn it's daddy.
Speaker 5 (10:13):
Now we'll see about it a minute.
Speaker 7 (10:15):
Daddy.
Speaker 6 (10:16):
Hello, sweetheart, here's your quarter.
Speaker 8 (10:19):
How about the interest and another nickel?
Speaker 4 (10:22):
Miser?
Speaker 7 (10:23):
Thank you? Bed?
Speaker 4 (10:24):
Well, what's going on in here? Oh?
Speaker 5 (10:26):
Not a thing, Dad.
Speaker 4 (10:28):
He's trying to borrow money. Look out for him, Kathy,
he's a slick one.
Speaker 5 (10:31):
Oh sure you have to worry about.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
Her, Jim.
Speaker 4 (10:34):
I'll be writing, Honey, there's a.
Speaker 3 (10:35):
Letter for you next to the phone ahead.
Speaker 4 (10:38):
I see it. Well, what do you suppose the mayor wants?
Speaker 7 (10:42):
Maybe he want you to help him with something received your.
Speaker 4 (10:51):
Impertinence? What in the name of Margaret?
Speaker 5 (10:55):
Anything wrong?
Speaker 4 (10:56):
Dad? I've never heard of anything Margaret. Margaret This is
the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.
Speaker 3 (11:03):
Just a moment, Dear Betty, Yes, mother, be sure the
peace don't boil over?
Speaker 4 (11:08):
Okay, how can you worry about peas at a time
like this. I've been ordered to appear in the Mayor's
office tomorrow afternoon. You've been ordered, yes, ordered, to explain
the impertinence in my letter.
Speaker 5 (11:21):
What letter?
Speaker 4 (11:21):
I don't know. I didn't write any letter, Daddy, What
is it, Kathy?
Speaker 7 (11:26):
Maybe he means my letter?
Speaker 4 (11:28):
You're you mean you wrote a letter to the mayor.
Speaker 7 (11:33):
Oh, you said he had.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
No right to tear down the meeting hall without asking you.
Speaker 3 (11:40):
Oh, dear, but tell Betty to turn the light off
under the peas.
Speaker 5 (11:44):
We'll probably be quite a while, Okay, Mom.
Speaker 4 (11:47):
Kathy, why do you do things like that?
Speaker 7 (11:50):
Well, I just said what you said.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
I don't care what you said. Or I said, little
girls don't write letters to the mayor. It isn't done.
Why because because he's a busy man. He's got too
many other things on his mind.
Speaker 7 (12:03):
But you said he shouldn't build the role.
Speaker 4 (12:05):
I know what I said, and.
Speaker 3 (12:06):
I still said, Jim, I'm sure you can straighten the
whole thing out. Can't you.
Speaker 4 (12:11):
I don't know. Why does he address it to me
in the first place. I didn't write the letter, Daddy.
If he wants me to speak to Kathy, I'll be
glad to the way he talks. You think I wrote it, daddy? Yes, Kathleen.
Speaker 7 (12:24):
Do mayors pay any attention to little girls?
Speaker 4 (12:27):
Of course not. They don't even have time to pay
attention to big girls.
Speaker 7 (12:33):
That's what I thought.
Speaker 4 (12:35):
What do you mean, that's what you thought?
Speaker 2 (12:37):
Well, after I wrote the letter, I figured maybe if
he found out I was only nine years old, he
wouldn't pay any attention to.
Speaker 4 (12:45):
It, So so.
Speaker 7 (12:49):
I signed your name.
Speaker 6 (12:51):
Oh no, Well, that was a fine speech father made
(13:12):
at the dinner table, though Mother did seem to have
some doubts. And yet there are some things every woman
loves to hear at her dinner table. For instance, best
cup of coffee I ever tasted. You'd like to hear
those words at your table, wouldn't it, Well, ma'am, tomorrow
you can hear them, and from the world's greatest coffee expert.
(13:32):
That's right, because the number one expert is your husband.
Of course, to the coffee trade, we're experts too, after all.
More people enjoy our Maxwell House coffee than any other brand.
But the expert with the final say so, he's that
man of yours, And if you'll fill his cup with
Maxwell House, we're mighty sure he'll say.
Speaker 4 (13:54):
Best coffee I ever tasted.
Speaker 6 (13:57):
In fact, if he doesn't, we'll give you your money back.
That's how sure we are. You see, we know no
coffee tastes like Maxwell House, because no coffee's made like
Maxwell House. That famous good to the last drop flavor
comes from just one thing, our recipe, a recipe demanding
certain fine coffees blended just so. And only Maxwell House
(14:21):
has that recipe. So get a pound of Maxwell House tomorrow,
serve it to your husband. If he doesn't say best
coffee ever, why just send us the can an unused portion,
and we'll gladly refund the price you paid. Our address
is right on every familiar blue tin. Tomorrow, see how
much your husband, the world's greatest coffee expert, enjoys Maxwell
(14:44):
House coffee, always good to the last drop. An ancient
Greek named Euripides is supposed to its the gods visit
the sins of the father upon the children. If that's
(15:04):
what he said, mister Euripides had rocks in his head,
or else he'd never run across a family named Anderson.
With them, the shoe is generally on the other foot,
And now as they wait in the corridor outside the
Mayor's office, the shoe is definitely beginning to pinch.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
Like this, Jim, the entire idea is completely ridiculous.
Speaker 4 (15:23):
It is no such thing.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
Making us drop everything we were doing just to come down.
Speaker 4 (15:26):
Here and sit Margaret. If he sees me in the
bosom of my family, yes, well, maybe you'd rather visit
me in the local jail, Jim, and bring me chocolate
covered hack saws.
Speaker 7 (15:40):
Jim Anderson, no one said you were going to be.
Speaker 3 (15:42):
Sent to Jay.
Speaker 4 (15:43):
How do you know? How can anybody know? Until we
find out what that genie is put in the letter.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
All you have to do is explain to the mayor, Kathy, did.
Speaker 7 (15:53):
You call me daddy?
Speaker 4 (15:55):
Oh h, what are you doing?
Speaker 7 (15:58):
I was reading a comic book?
Speaker 6 (16:00):
Why?
Speaker 4 (16:01):
Uh No, I was.
Speaker 3 (16:02):
Just never mind say did you hear that dad?
Speaker 5 (16:07):
They're blasting for the new road boy? That was a pip,
wasn't it.
Speaker 4 (16:11):
Yes? It was fine. Where's Betty?
Speaker 5 (16:14):
She's around someplace?
Speaker 7 (16:16):
Betty? Good?
Speaker 4 (16:18):
Well, I just thought, God, I brought you all along
to prove that I'm a man of character and substance.
But if you're going to stand outside the Mayor's office
and scream at the top of your lung, call me dead.
Speaker 7 (16:30):
Wants you Bud?
Speaker 3 (16:32):
Please?
Speaker 4 (16:33):
Margaret? I think they allow visitors in the jail on Wednesday.
Speaker 7 (16:38):
Are we going father?
Speaker 4 (16:40):
No, we're not going in. I'm beginning to think your
mother was right in the first place. I'll stand a
much better chance if I go in alone.
Speaker 7 (16:47):
What did we do?
Speaker 4 (16:49):
Nothing? Nobody in this family ever does anything. You can
get into more trouble than any ten kids in Springfield.
But it's a very strange thing. Nobody ever does anything.
Speaker 7 (16:59):
I went down to the end of the hall to
get a drink. What's wrong with that?
Speaker 4 (17:03):
I didn't say there was anything wrong with it. I
merely said, I'm thirsty. You stay right where you are.
Speaker 7 (17:08):
But they got a drink and you didn't tell her.
Speaker 4 (17:11):
She couldn't, Margaret, in one more minute, speak to them, Dear.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
Kathy, Betty, Bud, But Bud, come back here.
Speaker 5 (17:22):
I just want to look out the window.
Speaker 4 (17:23):
I said, come back here, only call.
Speaker 5 (17:27):
All we do is sit around this old hall. How
long do we have to stay here anyway?
Speaker 4 (17:31):
I haven't the faintest idea. Now, look, you may all
think that this is very funny, but it isn't. I'm
in a very serious predicament.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
Why, Jim, as soon as you tell him that Kathy
wrote the letter.
Speaker 4 (17:42):
He's going to ask where she picked up the ideas.
Don't you understand, honey, the mayor isn't a stupid man.
He knows the children don't have political opinions. They're like parrots.
They repeat whatever they hear.
Speaker 7 (17:52):
Why don't you tell them I heard it on the radio.
Speaker 4 (17:56):
You heard what on the radio that he's a crook? Kathy?
Speaker 3 (18:08):
You didn't tell the mayor.
Speaker 4 (18:10):
But Daddy said, you never said he was a crook?
Speaker 7 (18:13):
You did.
Speaker 4 (18:14):
No. I may have said a lot of things, but
I never said that he was a crook. Well I did, Margaret.
Mister Anderson, Yes, the mayor will see you now.
Speaker 3 (18:27):
Thank you very much, Jim, Dear, everything's going to be
all right.
Speaker 4 (18:30):
The condemned man at a hearty breakfast. Well, let's go.
Speaker 3 (18:36):
Fotter, please, Betty, let's not say a word, not even
if he asked or something.
Speaker 4 (18:40):
Nobody's going to ask you anything. Just try to look
human this way.
Speaker 7 (18:45):
Please, are you sure you didn't say he was a crook? Kathy, Well,
somebody did. I think that's.
Speaker 4 (18:55):
The trouble with his family. Too many people try to
think your roller. Yeah, James Anderson and family, Oh, come in,
come right in your honor. Well, this is a very
pleasant surprise. I hadn't anticipated five Anderson's you see, your honor.
That will be all bill, Thank you, yes, sir. Well,
(19:16):
now shall we all sit down and be comfortable?
Speaker 3 (19:18):
Well, thank you, your honor. You're very kind. All right, children,
your honor, Your honor.
Speaker 5 (19:22):
My father's a wonderful man, and every time he's been arrested,
it hasn't been.
Speaker 4 (19:26):
His father, your honor. I've never been arrested in my
entire life, my father.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Don't you remember the time you thought the car was
stolen and the police ready, well, they said you were
driving a stolen car.
Speaker 4 (19:42):
It was my own car. It was a mistake.
Speaker 7 (19:44):
Well, that's what Bud said, heady. Please, I'm just trying
to help.
Speaker 4 (19:49):
Your honor, mister Anderson. I received an amazing letter a
few days ago. I know your honor, and i'd like
to explain. I heard you speak some time ago at
a service Club luncheon, didn't I yes, I'm the president,
your honor, but i'd like to At that time he
struck me as being a fairly intelligent man, Thank you,
you see, your honor, not at all the sort of
(20:10):
man who'd spelled grafter with two teas grafter?
Speaker 7 (20:18):
Doesn't it have two teas?
Speaker 4 (20:20):
Oh dear, just one, Oh, your honor. If you'll only
let me explain, there'll be lots of time for explanation. First,
permit me to say that this was a very remarkable letter,
but it contained some very pertinent information and a very
valuable suggestion, Your Honor. What I'm trying to say is
it did. Oh yes, I've already had several talks with
(20:44):
the city Council and we are all agreed that your
ideas are not only logical, but extremely helpful. Well, I
wouldn't go quite that far, your honor.
Speaker 7 (20:56):
Aren't you going? Intelligent?
Speaker 3 (20:57):
Heathen?
Speaker 7 (20:57):
Be quiet, sathae gee.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
Where's now?
Speaker 4 (21:04):
For example, let's take the first point in your letter.
The first point. Yes, now, there is a very wise suggestion, uh,
your honor about the letter, Daddy.
Speaker 8 (21:16):
He means the part about changing the meeting hall into
a museum.
Speaker 4 (21:20):
All that part, well, it was merely outside of the
miserable spelling, the aprocious punctuation, and the weirdest grammar I
have ever encountered. The point was very well made.
Speaker 3 (21:33):
Your honor, what my husband has been trying to say.
Speaker 4 (21:36):
Of course, the letter was obviously written by a child.
Speaker 7 (21:39):
How does he know that?
Speaker 4 (21:42):
And I'm quite sure I know which child? Well, you see, dear,
there was no need.
Speaker 3 (21:46):
To be upset.
Speaker 4 (21:48):
The suggestions about the museum and the park to contain
it are reflections of definitely adult thinking. Well it was just,
and so was the impertinence. But your honor. If you
think I'm a crooked, say soul, don't hide behind your
children's I never said you were a crook, never. I
merely said that you were incompetent.
Speaker 6 (22:05):
Well, well what I meant, Oh you did, did you? Well,
your honor, that's what it was.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
He said you were in complident and you ought to
be out selling pencils.
Speaker 7 (22:24):
Well I knew it was something like that. Here and
tell him what you're gonna do to him.
Speaker 4 (22:30):
Next year, daddy, pathy, will you please?
Speaker 2 (22:32):
There's only a servant anyway, and if he doesn't stand
on his toes, we're gonna fire him.
Speaker 8 (22:38):
Happy be quiet, but you say it was a serve
haafy and you were gonna throw him out and put
somebody else in.
Speaker 7 (22:44):
And then you said.
Speaker 5 (22:45):
Want me to sit on our mom.
Speaker 2 (22:49):
Anytime the mayor thinks he's bigger than the people, let's
both sit on her. It's time somebody did something Adam.
They think they could go, oh bosh me, Oh you
like to put his hand on your honor.
Speaker 4 (23:03):
I'm very sorry about this whole thing, but you see,
we were talking at dinner the other night.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
I love my dad, Kathleen, and nobody's gonna put him
in jail happy, even if it doesn't have a.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
K what doesn't have a k?
Speaker 9 (23:22):
Yonkers?
Speaker 4 (23:30):
I'm beginning to be slightly confused. Well with my family.
That's an occupational hazard. We've confused more people to the
square inch than any ten families in town. But I'd
still like to explain. There's only one thing I want
you to explain. Why didn't you write this letter what
you obviously had a great deal to say. Why didn't
(23:52):
you say it to me? Well, your honor, I wouldn't
presume you's so my foot, your honor, That's what I said,
my foot. People vote for you expect you to do
a job for them, and then what do they do? Nothing?
But we we didn't think it was our place. Well,
whose place did you think it was? How can we
do anything for you if you don't tell us what
(24:13):
you want done? Well, you were elected on a certain
platform and I have held to it. You wanted a
progressive administration and you've had it. We didn't want it
to tear Springfield the park. Then say so, don't tell
your children, tell.
Speaker 7 (24:27):
Us go ahead and kill them park?
Speaker 4 (24:34):
Well, go ahead, all right. What do you want to know?
Why don't you like the new road? I do? It's
just that. Well, when I was a boy, I played
on the steps of the old meeting Hall. So did
my father when he was a boy. You're tearing down
more than just a building. You're destroying a whole page
of Springfield's memory. And you suggest that we turn it
into a museum instead. Is that it?
Speaker 6 (24:56):
Well?
Speaker 4 (24:56):
I thought you could move it a few blocks there's
a lot of vacant land to the old meeting hall,
and build a small park around it, something like that.
Do you have any idea of the cost? No? But
the people. Do you think the people would stand still
for a bond issue to finance it. I think so.
After all, if it's part of Springfield tradition, all right,
then we'll do something about it. Excuse me, Bill, Yes, sir,
(25:19):
call the papers. I want a special press conference in
my office at five o'clock. Yes, tell them it's about
starting a campaign to save the old meeting hall for
some of our sentimental citizens. Yes. Now is there anything else?
Speaker 7 (25:33):
Well, our school gets out awful.
Speaker 4 (25:36):
May your honor, do you still think I'm a crook
and a grafter? I never said that, your honor. I
merely said that.
Speaker 7 (25:43):
You were in conflict pathy.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
When we get home, remind me Anderson, We're here to
do a job as best we know how, and it's
up to you to see that we do it, or you.
Speaker 7 (25:56):
The out selling pencils. Kathleen, please, oh daddy, there.
Speaker 4 (26:03):
Your honor, all I ever said. You said you'd vote
me out of office, didn't you? Well, yes, but why
don't you give me a chance. If you don't like
what I'm doing, tell me don't let me find out
about it at the polls. Then it's too late, your honor.
I merely said we want to do our job for
you in the best possible manner. But we aren't bind readers.
You've got to tell us when we're off on the
(26:24):
wrong foot. Well, if you just there's only one thing
wrong with you, Anderson, and it's the same thing that's
wrong with most of the people in this country. What
you need is a good lesson in civics.
Speaker 6 (26:56):
During the year ahead, every pound of coffee you bought,
be sure of one thing. Be sure that you get
the most in flavor for your money. And that's something
the world's greatest coffee expert can help you. Find. Your husband,
he's the expert we mean. Just serve him a cup
of Maxwell House coffee. Then when he smiles and says,
(27:18):
best coffee I ever tasted, you'll know Maxwell House has
the flavor that it's your coffee buy find out tomorrow,
bring home a friendly blue tin of Maxwell House coffee,
serve it to your husband, listen to him praise that
famous flavor, and then count all the truly good cups
of coffee you get from each pond at.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
Your own table.
Speaker 6 (27:40):
Find out how much more you get for your money
with Maxwell House coffee always good to the last drop.
Speaker 4 (27:55):
Time goes by as time has a habit of doing,
and once again it's the dinner hour in the white
frame house on Maple Street. Considering that it's the Anderson's,
things are pretty calm, well for the moment, at any
rate like.
Speaker 3 (28:07):
This, let me see bread, butter cream, Betty? Yes, mother,
you better bring in some more spoons.
Speaker 4 (28:15):
Dear, Okay, dinner about ready, honey, just about come on by,
let's go upstairs and wah.
Speaker 5 (28:20):
You bet stay dead. You don't suppose they'll put our
pictures in the paper, do you?
Speaker 4 (28:24):
Why should they?
Speaker 6 (28:25):
Well?
Speaker 5 (28:25):
I mean, after all the mayor said about the.
Speaker 4 (28:27):
Pod God, I'm perfectly happy just staying out of jail.
Speaker 7 (28:31):
Hi, everybody, Kathy, where on earth have you been? I
was out? Why is dinner ready?
Speaker 4 (28:38):
Young lady? When you know it's dinner time, why don't
you stay where we can find you?
Speaker 7 (28:42):
But I had to get down to the corner. What
for I had to nail a letter to the president.
Speaker 6 (28:48):
Oh at breakfast time, you don't have to say you.
Speaker 3 (29:05):
Children eat your cereal right this instant?
Speaker 4 (29:07):
Just say hop along.
Speaker 3 (29:09):
Cassidy is crazy about hot wheatmeal.
Speaker 6 (29:11):
Just a little psychology, Yes, to get your children to
eat a hot cereal, just tell them post sweetmeal is
hop along. Cassidy's favorite hot cereal, and they lead it too.
Post Sweetmeal is chuck full of solid whole wheat nourishment
as a wonderful nut like flavor, and at cooks in
just three and a half minutes. You'll see you'll all
agree it's the best hot cereal you ever ate. Join
(29:41):
us again next week when we'll be back with Father
Knows Best, starring Robert young Is, Jim Anderson, the Roy Bargee,
and the Maxwell House Orchestra, and yours truly a bill Foreman.
Speaker 4 (29:50):
So until next Thursday, good night and good luck from
the makers of Maxwell House, America's favorite brand of coffee,
always good to the last drop. Father Knows Best was
transcribed in Hollywood and written by Ed Jabos. Now stay
tuned in for Dragnet, which follows immediately over most of these.
Speaker 10 (30:12):
Stations, Jack Webb and Dragnet Good listening next on NBC.
Speaker 1 (30:34):
Please send your questions and comments to host at classiccomedyotr
dot com. Until next time. In the words of James Thurber,
let us not go back in anger or forward in fear,
but around in awareness.
Welcome to classic comedy of old time radio. I'm your host,
Ron Ecklebarger. After hearing Father rant and rave about the mayor,
Kathy decides to write a letter to his honor, letting
him know exactly what her father thinks about him. Now,
I want to let you know we are skipping over
two episodes of Father Knows Best so that we can
(00:37):
air them in a couple of months during Christmas and
New Year's as they are holiday themed episodes. For now,
this is episode number sixty three of Father Knows Best,
entitled Taking on City Hall. It originally aired on January fourth,
nineteen fifty one.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Mother's Natsville House really the only coffee in.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
The world where your father says so and your father
knows best.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
Yes, it's Father Knows Best, transcribed in Hollywood, starring Robert
Young as Father. A half hour visit with your neighbors,
the Andersons, brought to you by America's favorite coffee, Maxwell House,
the coffee That's always good to the last drop. In
(01:43):
speaking of children, the poet Charles M. Dickinson wrote, they
are idols of hearts and of households. They are angels
of God in disguise The sunlight still sleeps in their tresses,
his glory still gleams in their eyes. Well, it seems
like a pretty good bet that mister Dickinson never spent
any appreciable time in Springfield, especially in a certain white
(02:06):
frame house on Maple Street. If he did, it's a
cinch that he never stayed for dinner, where the conversation
generally goes something like this, But Dad, I.
Speaker 5 (02:15):
Won't get my allowance until Monday, and I've only got
twenty cents.
Speaker 4 (02:19):
That's very interesting, Kathy stopped playing with your mashed potatoes.
Speaker 5 (02:24):
Yes, Daddy, it isn't as if I needed a whole lot. Heck,
what's fifty cents?
Speaker 4 (02:30):
Well, lately i've heard it referred to as a nineteen
fifty nickel. That was a joke, Margaret, fifty cents nineteen
fifty nickel?
Speaker 6 (02:39):
You see, I heard you, Jim Oh, I.
Speaker 4 (02:45):
Just thought, Bud, will you please pass the bread?
Speaker 5 (02:49):
Gosh, if you needed fifty cents and I had fifty cents,
you know I'd be only too glad to lend it
to you.
Speaker 4 (02:56):
That's very noble of you.
Speaker 5 (02:57):
You mean I can have it?
Speaker 4 (02:59):
No, that's wonderful, gravy, Margaret, would you mind passing it, Betty?
Speaker 3 (03:05):
Please here you are, father, thank you?
Speaker 4 (03:08):
Say Mom, your mother's not going to lend you the
fifty cents either, Bud, so stop bothering her.
Speaker 5 (03:12):
I wasn't bothering her, Dad.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
I just thought, and if Bud really needs the money.
Speaker 4 (03:16):
This is Thursday, Margarety. God, he's allowance only three days ago.
Speaker 5 (03:19):
Well, how did I know she was going to be
a pig?
Speaker 4 (03:24):
Who Marion Swift?
Speaker 5 (03:26):
Believe me, it'll be a long time before I invite
her in for another All all I said was would
you like them all? And you know what?
Speaker 4 (03:34):
She ordered?
Speaker 5 (03:35):
A triple deca sandwich and a hut Fudge Sunday with nuts.
Speaker 4 (03:43):
That is one of the unfortunate things about life, Bud.
All women are born hungry, why Jim, especially beautiful women.
Speaker 5 (03:55):
I hope she gets a stomach ache.
Speaker 4 (03:56):
But teacher Kathy, if you're quite finished with that construction job,
may I suggest that you put your potatoes to the
use for which they were intended. Huh eat your dinner?
Speaker 7 (04:09):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (04:10):
Oh? What?
Speaker 7 (04:11):
Okay?
Speaker 4 (04:16):
Go ahead, dear say Betty.
Speaker 7 (04:18):
Don't ask me for any money.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
I'm broke.
Speaker 7 (04:21):
She wouldn't even give any to Billy Smith.
Speaker 4 (04:23):
Kathy, wait, a minute. You mean Billy Smith asked you
for money?
Speaker 7 (04:28):
Well, he said he needed eighty cents in a hurry.
Speaker 4 (04:30):
What's gotten into these kids anyway? Imagine a boy asking
a girl for money.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
Well, they've been friends for such a long time.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
It's outrageous, That's what it is. Just plain outrageous.
Speaker 7 (04:41):
I think it is too creepers.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
It's only been three days since I borrowed it from him.
Speaker 7 (04:51):
What were you saying, Jim?
Speaker 4 (04:53):
I uh, I was just how are you getting along
in school these days? Kathy?
Speaker 7 (04:59):
Oh? Pretty good?
Speaker 5 (05:01):
How about thirty cents?
Speaker 4 (05:03):
That isn't much, But please, I was talking to your sister.
What were you saying about school, Kathy?
Speaker 7 (05:09):
I wasn't saying anything.
Speaker 4 (05:11):
Well, say something about anything.
Speaker 7 (05:17):
Okay.
Speaker 8 (05:19):
I didn't win the spelling contest today, Well that's nice.
Speaker 4 (05:24):
Was there anything else you didn't win?
Speaker 8 (05:26):
Well, how did I know there wasn't any? K In civics,
I don't even know what civics are. You don't know
what civics is, That's what I said. You said you
don't know what civics are.
Speaker 7 (05:39):
Well, I don't, Kathy.
Speaker 4 (05:44):
The point Betty is trying to make is that civics
is in the singular, not the plural.
Speaker 7 (05:49):
They are.
Speaker 4 (05:53):
Not they are? They is? I mean it is? What
is civics is, Kathy, Civics is a noun, and there's
just one one. Civics like Yonkers, there's only one Yonkers.
Speaker 7 (06:14):
Why are they?
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Yunkers is a town. It's a place where people live.
Why because they Kathleen, eat your dinner.
Speaker 7 (06:26):
But you didn't tell me.
Speaker 4 (06:27):
I said, eat your dinner, Jim.
Speaker 3 (06:29):
I think you're being very unreasonable. Why don't you tell
Kathy what she wants to know?
Speaker 4 (06:33):
I did tell her. I told her civics was a
singular noun. What more is there to tell?
Speaker 3 (06:37):
You can tell her what civics are or is?
Speaker 9 (06:42):
Well?
Speaker 4 (06:42):
All right, Kathy, civics is it's the uh Dad, it's
from the Latin. Uh what do you call it? Which
means citizen? And uh? You see, Kathy, the government is
divided up into certain groups and other groups. Now, the
government has a certain responsibility to the people, and the
(07:04):
people have a certain responsibility to the government. Which is
the way it should be, isn't it?
Speaker 7 (07:09):
Dan?
Speaker 4 (07:10):
But will you please Keith still, I'm trying to explain
civics to Kathy.
Speaker 5 (07:14):
Civics is that department of political science dealing with the
rights of citizenship and the duties of.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
Citizens, which is exactly what I just thin he's saying,
isn't it, Betty? Word for a word, Well, it meant
the same thing. Maybe I don't remember the formal definition,
but I certainly know the practical application of the word.
And that's what Kathy's really interested in, isn't it, Kathy?
Speaker 3 (07:39):
It is.
Speaker 4 (07:42):
Take well, take Springfield for example. We know that we
have a mayor, a city assembly, and the usual city employees.
Now each of these is a public servant, and his
principal duty is to protect the rights and privileges of
the people. That's clear, isn't it. Jim.
Speaker 3 (07:56):
I'm sure that Kathy doesn't care about Margaret.
Speaker 4 (07:58):
This is very interesting. What was that, Betty?
Speaker 2 (08:02):
I was just clearing my throat father, so I can
listen better.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
It's high time his family took a little interest in
something other than boyfriends in the price of hot fudge Sundays.
But I didn't mind, Bud. I'm explaining about civics, and
it's very interesting, isn't it, Kathy. Oh? Sure, that's up
to the citizens of every community to see that their
rights are protected. That's why we have elections to keep
the public servants on their toes. I take the mayor
(08:32):
for example. If we think the mayor is doing a
bad job, we don't vote for him again. We throw
him out, put somebody else in beddy.
Speaker 3 (08:39):
We'd better start clearing the table.
Speaker 7 (08:41):
Okay.
Speaker 4 (08:42):
Anytime a public servant thinks he's bigger than the people,
well that's the time to watch out. I take this
new highway. What right do they have to tear down
the old meeting hall for a new highway? That's what
I want to know.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
Don't take the cake, mom, all right, dear, I don't.
Speaker 4 (08:56):
Mind progress, but there's such a thing as sentiment. That
building is a monument and it holds precious memories for
everyone in Springfield. But do they care. No, they're going
to tear it down build a road. And they didn't
even have the decency to ask the people if that's
what they wanted.
Speaker 3 (09:13):
Margaret, go ahead, we're listening.
Speaker 4 (09:16):
We've taken just about all we're going to take from
that bunch of incompetence in the city Hall. After the
next election, they'll be out selling pencils on the street corners.
And if they think, Kathy, will you please stop fidgeting.
Speaker 7 (09:28):
But I don't understand something.
Speaker 4 (09:30):
Well, I've made it perfectly clear.
Speaker 7 (09:32):
I know.
Speaker 9 (09:32):
But what are yunkers.
Speaker 5 (09:47):
For crying out loud? Kathy? You can trust me, can't you.
Speaker 8 (09:51):
You said you'd give it back to me on Monday,
and this is Monday.
Speaker 5 (09:55):
But you don't need the quarter. I do too, Look, Kathy,
don't you just let me pay you the interest?
Speaker 7 (10:02):
I want my quarter and.
Speaker 5 (10:04):
Next Monday I'll give you the quarter and another nickel
for interest.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
I want my quarter of all the stubborn it's daddy.
Speaker 5 (10:13):
Now we'll see about it a minute.
Speaker 7 (10:15):
Daddy.
Speaker 6 (10:16):
Hello, sweetheart, here's your quarter.
Speaker 8 (10:19):
How about the interest and another nickel?
Speaker 4 (10:22):
Miser?
Speaker 7 (10:23):
Thank you? Bed?
Speaker 4 (10:24):
Well, what's going on in here? Oh?
Speaker 5 (10:26):
Not a thing, Dad.
Speaker 4 (10:28):
He's trying to borrow money. Look out for him, Kathy,
he's a slick one.
Speaker 5 (10:31):
Oh sure you have to worry about.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
Her, Jim.
Speaker 4 (10:34):
I'll be writing, Honey, there's a.
Speaker 3 (10:35):
Letter for you next to the phone ahead.
Speaker 4 (10:38):
I see it. Well, what do you suppose the mayor wants?
Speaker 7 (10:42):
Maybe he want you to help him with something received your.
Speaker 4 (10:51):
Impertinence? What in the name of Margaret?
Speaker 5 (10:55):
Anything wrong?
Speaker 4 (10:56):
Dad? I've never heard of anything Margaret. Margaret This is
the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.
Speaker 3 (11:03):
Just a moment, Dear Betty, Yes, mother, be sure the
peace don't boil over?
Speaker 4 (11:08):
Okay, how can you worry about peas at a time
like this. I've been ordered to appear in the Mayor's
office tomorrow afternoon. You've been ordered, yes, ordered, to explain
the impertinence in my letter.
Speaker 5 (11:21):
What letter?
Speaker 4 (11:21):
I don't know. I didn't write any letter, Daddy, What
is it, Kathy?
Speaker 7 (11:26):
Maybe he means my letter?
Speaker 4 (11:28):
You're you mean you wrote a letter to the mayor.
Speaker 7 (11:33):
Oh, you said he had.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
No right to tear down the meeting hall without asking you.
Speaker 3 (11:40):
Oh, dear, but tell Betty to turn the light off
under the peas.
Speaker 5 (11:44):
We'll probably be quite a while, Okay, Mom.
Speaker 4 (11:47):
Kathy, why do you do things like that?
Speaker 7 (11:50):
Well, I just said what you said.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
I don't care what you said. Or I said, little
girls don't write letters to the mayor. It isn't done.
Why because because he's a busy man. He's got too
many other things on his mind.
Speaker 7 (12:03):
But you said he shouldn't build the role.
Speaker 4 (12:05):
I know what I said, and.
Speaker 3 (12:06):
I still said, Jim, I'm sure you can straighten the
whole thing out. Can't you.
Speaker 4 (12:11):
I don't know. Why does he address it to me
in the first place. I didn't write the letter, Daddy.
If he wants me to speak to Kathy, I'll be
glad to the way he talks. You think I wrote it, daddy? Yes, Kathleen.
Speaker 7 (12:24):
Do mayors pay any attention to little girls?
Speaker 4 (12:27):
Of course not. They don't even have time to pay
attention to big girls.
Speaker 7 (12:33):
That's what I thought.
Speaker 4 (12:35):
What do you mean, that's what you thought?
Speaker 2 (12:37):
Well, after I wrote the letter, I figured maybe if
he found out I was only nine years old, he
wouldn't pay any attention to.
Speaker 4 (12:45):
It, So so.
Speaker 7 (12:49):
I signed your name.
Speaker 6 (12:51):
Oh no, Well, that was a fine speech father made
(13:12):
at the dinner table, though Mother did seem to have
some doubts. And yet there are some things every woman
loves to hear at her dinner table. For instance, best
cup of coffee I ever tasted. You'd like to hear
those words at your table, wouldn't it, Well, ma'am, tomorrow
you can hear them, and from the world's greatest coffee expert.
(13:32):
That's right, because the number one expert is your husband.
Of course, to the coffee trade, we're experts too, after all.
More people enjoy our Maxwell House coffee than any other brand.
But the expert with the final say so, he's that
man of yours, And if you'll fill his cup with
Maxwell House, we're mighty sure he'll say.
Speaker 4 (13:54):
Best coffee I ever tasted.
Speaker 6 (13:57):
In fact, if he doesn't, we'll give you your money back.
That's how sure we are. You see, we know no
coffee tastes like Maxwell House, because no coffee's made like
Maxwell House. That famous good to the last drop flavor
comes from just one thing, our recipe, a recipe demanding
certain fine coffees blended just so. And only Maxwell House
(14:21):
has that recipe. So get a pound of Maxwell House tomorrow,
serve it to your husband. If he doesn't say best
coffee ever, why just send us the can an unused portion,
and we'll gladly refund the price you paid. Our address
is right on every familiar blue tin. Tomorrow, see how
much your husband, the world's greatest coffee expert, enjoys Maxwell
(14:44):
House coffee, always good to the last drop. An ancient
Greek named Euripides is supposed to its the gods visit
the sins of the father upon the children. If that's
(15:04):
what he said, mister Euripides had rocks in his head,
or else he'd never run across a family named Anderson.
With them, the shoe is generally on the other foot,
And now as they wait in the corridor outside the
Mayor's office, the shoe is definitely beginning to pinch.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
Like this, Jim, the entire idea is completely ridiculous.
Speaker 4 (15:23):
It is no such thing.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
Making us drop everything we were doing just to come down.
Speaker 4 (15:26):
Here and sit Margaret. If he sees me in the
bosom of my family, yes, well, maybe you'd rather visit
me in the local jail, Jim, and bring me chocolate
covered hack saws.
Speaker 7 (15:40):
Jim Anderson, no one said you were going to be.
Speaker 3 (15:42):
Sent to Jay.
Speaker 4 (15:43):
How do you know? How can anybody know? Until we
find out what that genie is put in the letter.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
All you have to do is explain to the mayor, Kathy, did.
Speaker 7 (15:53):
You call me daddy?
Speaker 4 (15:55):
Oh h, what are you doing?
Speaker 7 (15:58):
I was reading a comic book?
Speaker 6 (16:00):
Why?
Speaker 4 (16:01):
Uh No, I was.
Speaker 3 (16:02):
Just never mind say did you hear that dad?
Speaker 5 (16:07):
They're blasting for the new road boy? That was a pip,
wasn't it.
Speaker 4 (16:11):
Yes? It was fine. Where's Betty?
Speaker 5 (16:14):
She's around someplace?
Speaker 7 (16:16):
Betty? Good?
Speaker 4 (16:18):
Well, I just thought, God, I brought you all along
to prove that I'm a man of character and substance.
But if you're going to stand outside the Mayor's office
and scream at the top of your lung, call me dead.
Speaker 7 (16:30):
Wants you Bud?
Speaker 3 (16:32):
Please?
Speaker 4 (16:33):
Margaret? I think they allow visitors in the jail on Wednesday.
Speaker 7 (16:38):
Are we going father?
Speaker 4 (16:40):
No, we're not going in. I'm beginning to think your
mother was right in the first place. I'll stand a
much better chance if I go in alone.
Speaker 7 (16:47):
What did we do?
Speaker 4 (16:49):
Nothing? Nobody in this family ever does anything. You can
get into more trouble than any ten kids in Springfield.
But it's a very strange thing. Nobody ever does anything.
Speaker 7 (16:59):
I went down to the end of the hall to
get a drink. What's wrong with that?
Speaker 4 (17:03):
I didn't say there was anything wrong with it. I
merely said, I'm thirsty. You stay right where you are.
Speaker 7 (17:08):
But they got a drink and you didn't tell her.
Speaker 4 (17:11):
She couldn't, Margaret, in one more minute, speak to them, Dear.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
Kathy, Betty, Bud, But Bud, come back here.
Speaker 5 (17:22):
I just want to look out the window.
Speaker 4 (17:23):
I said, come back here, only call.
Speaker 5 (17:27):
All we do is sit around this old hall. How
long do we have to stay here anyway?
Speaker 4 (17:31):
I haven't the faintest idea. Now, look, you may all
think that this is very funny, but it isn't. I'm
in a very serious predicament.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
Why, Jim, as soon as you tell him that Kathy
wrote the letter.
Speaker 4 (17:42):
He's going to ask where she picked up the ideas.
Don't you understand, honey, the mayor isn't a stupid man.
He knows the children don't have political opinions. They're like parrots.
They repeat whatever they hear.
Speaker 7 (17:52):
Why don't you tell them I heard it on the radio.
Speaker 4 (17:56):
You heard what on the radio that he's a crook? Kathy?
Speaker 3 (18:08):
You didn't tell the mayor.
Speaker 4 (18:10):
But Daddy said, you never said he was a crook?
Speaker 7 (18:13):
You did.
Speaker 4 (18:14):
No. I may have said a lot of things, but
I never said that he was a crook. Well I did, Margaret.
Mister Anderson, Yes, the mayor will see you now.
Speaker 3 (18:27):
Thank you very much, Jim, Dear, everything's going to be
all right.
Speaker 4 (18:30):
The condemned man at a hearty breakfast. Well, let's go.
Speaker 3 (18:36):
Fotter, please, Betty, let's not say a word, not even
if he asked or something.
Speaker 4 (18:40):
Nobody's going to ask you anything. Just try to look
human this way.
Speaker 7 (18:45):
Please, are you sure you didn't say he was a crook? Kathy, Well,
somebody did. I think that's.
Speaker 4 (18:55):
The trouble with his family. Too many people try to
think your roller. Yeah, James Anderson and family, Oh, come in,
come right in your honor. Well, this is a very
pleasant surprise. I hadn't anticipated five Anderson's you see, your honor.
That will be all bill, Thank you, yes, sir. Well,
(19:16):
now shall we all sit down and be comfortable?
Speaker 3 (19:18):
Well, thank you, your honor. You're very kind. All right, children,
your honor, Your honor.
Speaker 5 (19:22):
My father's a wonderful man, and every time he's been arrested,
it hasn't been.
Speaker 4 (19:26):
His father, your honor. I've never been arrested in my
entire life, my father.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Don't you remember the time you thought the car was
stolen and the police ready, well, they said you were
driving a stolen car.
Speaker 4 (19:42):
It was my own car. It was a mistake.
Speaker 7 (19:44):
Well, that's what Bud said, heady. Please, I'm just trying
to help.
Speaker 4 (19:49):
Your honor, mister Anderson. I received an amazing letter a
few days ago. I know your honor, and i'd like
to explain. I heard you speak some time ago at
a service Club luncheon, didn't I yes, I'm the president,
your honor, but i'd like to At that time he
struck me as being a fairly intelligent man, Thank you,
you see, your honor, not at all the sort of
(20:10):
man who'd spelled grafter with two teas grafter?
Speaker 7 (20:18):
Doesn't it have two teas?
Speaker 4 (20:20):
Oh dear, just one, Oh, your honor. If you'll only
let me explain, there'll be lots of time for explanation. First,
permit me to say that this was a very remarkable letter,
but it contained some very pertinent information and a very
valuable suggestion, Your Honor. What I'm trying to say is
it did. Oh yes, I've already had several talks with
(20:44):
the city Council and we are all agreed that your
ideas are not only logical, but extremely helpful. Well, I
wouldn't go quite that far, your honor.
Speaker 7 (20:56):
Aren't you going? Intelligent?
Speaker 3 (20:57):
Heathen?
Speaker 7 (20:57):
Be quiet, sathae gee.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
Where's now?
Speaker 4 (21:04):
For example, let's take the first point in your letter.
The first point. Yes, now, there is a very wise suggestion, uh,
your honor about the letter, Daddy.
Speaker 8 (21:16):
He means the part about changing the meeting hall into
a museum.
Speaker 4 (21:20):
All that part, well, it was merely outside of the
miserable spelling, the aprocious punctuation, and the weirdest grammar I
have ever encountered. The point was very well made.
Speaker 3 (21:33):
Your honor, what my husband has been trying to say.
Speaker 4 (21:36):
Of course, the letter was obviously written by a child.
Speaker 7 (21:39):
How does he know that?
Speaker 4 (21:42):
And I'm quite sure I know which child? Well, you see, dear,
there was no need.
Speaker 3 (21:46):
To be upset.
Speaker 4 (21:48):
The suggestions about the museum and the park to contain
it are reflections of definitely adult thinking. Well it was just,
and so was the impertinence. But your honor. If you
think I'm a crooked, say soul, don't hide behind your
children's I never said you were a crook, never. I
merely said that you were incompetent.
Speaker 6 (22:05):
Well, well what I meant, Oh you did, did you? Well,
your honor, that's what it was.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
He said you were in complident and you ought to
be out selling pencils.
Speaker 7 (22:24):
Well I knew it was something like that. Here and
tell him what you're gonna do to him.
Speaker 4 (22:30):
Next year, daddy, pathy, will you please?
Speaker 2 (22:32):
There's only a servant anyway, and if he doesn't stand
on his toes, we're gonna fire him.
Speaker 8 (22:38):
Happy be quiet, but you say it was a serve
haafy and you were gonna throw him out and put
somebody else in.
Speaker 7 (22:44):
And then you said.
Speaker 5 (22:45):
Want me to sit on our mom.
Speaker 2 (22:49):
Anytime the mayor thinks he's bigger than the people, let's
both sit on her. It's time somebody did something Adam.
They think they could go, oh bosh me, Oh you
like to put his hand on your honor.
Speaker 4 (23:03):
I'm very sorry about this whole thing, but you see,
we were talking at dinner the other night.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
I love my dad, Kathleen, and nobody's gonna put him
in jail happy, even if it doesn't have a.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
K what doesn't have a k?
Speaker 9 (23:22):
Yonkers?
Speaker 4 (23:30):
I'm beginning to be slightly confused. Well with my family.
That's an occupational hazard. We've confused more people to the
square inch than any ten families in town. But I'd
still like to explain. There's only one thing I want
you to explain. Why didn't you write this letter what
you obviously had a great deal to say. Why didn't
(23:52):
you say it to me? Well, your honor, I wouldn't
presume you's so my foot, your honor, That's what I said,
my foot. People vote for you expect you to do
a job for them, and then what do they do? Nothing?
But we we didn't think it was our place. Well,
whose place did you think it was? How can we
do anything for you if you don't tell us what
(24:13):
you want done? Well, you were elected on a certain
platform and I have held to it. You wanted a
progressive administration and you've had it. We didn't want it
to tear Springfield the park. Then say so, don't tell
your children, tell.
Speaker 7 (24:27):
Us go ahead and kill them park?
Speaker 4 (24:34):
Well, go ahead, all right. What do you want to know?
Why don't you like the new road? I do? It's
just that. Well, when I was a boy, I played
on the steps of the old meeting Hall. So did
my father when he was a boy. You're tearing down
more than just a building. You're destroying a whole page
of Springfield's memory. And you suggest that we turn it
into a museum instead. Is that it?
Speaker 6 (24:56):
Well?
Speaker 4 (24:56):
I thought you could move it a few blocks there's
a lot of vacant land to the old meeting hall,
and build a small park around it, something like that.
Do you have any idea of the cost? No? But
the people. Do you think the people would stand still
for a bond issue to finance it. I think so.
After all, if it's part of Springfield tradition, all right,
then we'll do something about it. Excuse me, Bill, Yes, sir,
(25:19):
call the papers. I want a special press conference in
my office at five o'clock. Yes, tell them it's about
starting a campaign to save the old meeting hall for
some of our sentimental citizens. Yes. Now is there anything else?
Speaker 7 (25:33):
Well, our school gets out awful.
Speaker 4 (25:36):
May your honor, do you still think I'm a crook
and a grafter? I never said that, your honor. I
merely said that.
Speaker 7 (25:43):
You were in conflict pathy.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
When we get home, remind me Anderson, We're here to
do a job as best we know how, and it's
up to you to see that we do it, or you.
Speaker 7 (25:56):
The out selling pencils. Kathleen, please, oh daddy, there.
Speaker 4 (26:03):
Your honor, all I ever said. You said you'd vote
me out of office, didn't you? Well, yes, but why
don't you give me a chance. If you don't like
what I'm doing, tell me don't let me find out
about it at the polls. Then it's too late, your honor.
I merely said we want to do our job for
you in the best possible manner. But we aren't bind readers.
You've got to tell us when we're off on the
(26:24):
wrong foot. Well, if you just there's only one thing
wrong with you, Anderson, and it's the same thing that's
wrong with most of the people in this country. What
you need is a good lesson in civics.
Speaker 6 (26:56):
During the year ahead, every pound of coffee you bought,
be sure of one thing. Be sure that you get
the most in flavor for your money. And that's something
the world's greatest coffee expert can help you. Find. Your husband,
he's the expert we mean. Just serve him a cup
of Maxwell House coffee. Then when he smiles and says,
(27:18):
best coffee I ever tasted, you'll know Maxwell House has
the flavor that it's your coffee buy find out tomorrow,
bring home a friendly blue tin of Maxwell House coffee,
serve it to your husband, listen to him praise that
famous flavor, and then count all the truly good cups
of coffee you get from each pond at.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
Your own table.
Speaker 6 (27:40):
Find out how much more you get for your money
with Maxwell House coffee always good to the last drop.
Speaker 4 (27:55):
Time goes by as time has a habit of doing,
and once again it's the dinner hour in the white
frame house on Maple Street. Considering that it's the Anderson's,
things are pretty calm, well for the moment, at any
rate like.
Speaker 3 (28:07):
This, let me see bread, butter cream, Betty? Yes, mother,
you better bring in some more spoons.
Speaker 4 (28:15):
Dear, Okay, dinner about ready, honey, just about come on by,
let's go upstairs and wah.
Speaker 5 (28:20):
You bet stay dead. You don't suppose they'll put our
pictures in the paper, do you?
Speaker 4 (28:24):
Why should they?
Speaker 6 (28:25):
Well?
Speaker 5 (28:25):
I mean, after all the mayor said about the.
Speaker 4 (28:27):
Pod God, I'm perfectly happy just staying out of jail.
Speaker 7 (28:31):
Hi, everybody, Kathy, where on earth have you been? I
was out? Why is dinner ready?
Speaker 4 (28:38):
Young lady? When you know it's dinner time, why don't
you stay where we can find you?
Speaker 7 (28:42):
But I had to get down to the corner. What
for I had to nail a letter to the president.
Speaker 6 (28:48):
Oh at breakfast time, you don't have to say you.
Speaker 3 (29:05):
Children eat your cereal right this instant?
Speaker 4 (29:07):
Just say hop along.
Speaker 3 (29:09):
Cassidy is crazy about hot wheatmeal.
Speaker 6 (29:11):
Just a little psychology, Yes, to get your children to
eat a hot cereal, just tell them post sweetmeal is
hop along. Cassidy's favorite hot cereal, and they lead it too.
Post Sweetmeal is chuck full of solid whole wheat nourishment
as a wonderful nut like flavor, and at cooks in
just three and a half minutes. You'll see you'll all
agree it's the best hot cereal you ever ate. Join
(29:41):
us again next week when we'll be back with Father
Knows Best, starring Robert young Is, Jim Anderson, the Roy Bargee,
and the Maxwell House Orchestra, and yours truly a bill Foreman.
Speaker 4 (29:50):
So until next Thursday, good night and good luck from
the makers of Maxwell House, America's favorite brand of coffee,
always good to the last drop. Father Knows Best was
transcribed in Hollywood and written by Ed Jabos. Now stay
tuned in for Dragnet, which follows immediately over most of these.
Speaker 10 (30:12):
Stations, Jack Webb and Dragnet Good listening next on NBC.
Speaker 1 (30:34):
Please send your questions and comments to host at classiccomedyotr
dot com. Until next time. In the words of James Thurber,
let us not go back in anger or forward in fear,
but around in awareness.
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