May 30, 2025 • 48 mins
Hey lady! As a Black woman you know all too well the million different ways we have to command respect as we navigate our daily lives. It can be as intense as the feeling of being passed over for promotion after having a standout year or as mundane, but profoundly important, like saying your name correctly.
Luvvie Ajayi Jones, renowned author, speaker and entrepreneur joins the Cultivating H.E.R. Space team to discuss her latest offering Little Trouble Maker Defends Her Name, a deeply personal book about Luvvie’s steadfast pride in determing who she is told in a children’t format. Luvvie stops by the podcast to discuss how she decided at a young age that she would take pride in her name and honor the sacredness of owning your name. She offers wisdom about letting that deep sense of self guide your path as she connects the dots of her journey from blogger to New York Times bestselling author.
Lady, if you’re in need of a jolt of authentic inspration then this episode is one you won’t want to miss!
Quote of the Day:
"I have the confidence of a Black woman who WINS in spite of everything thrown at her. That confidence is grounding."
– Luvvie Ajayi Jones
Where to find Luvvie Ajayi Jones:
Website: www.awesomelyluvvie.com
Book: Little Trouble Maker Defends Her Name
Patreon: Luvvie Ajayi Jones
Instagram: @luvvie
LinkedIn: Luvvie Ajayi Jones
Goal Map Like a Pro Workbook
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cultivating-h-e-r-space-uplifting-conversations-for-the-black-woman--5470036/support.
Luvvie Ajayi Jones, renowned author, speaker and entrepreneur joins the Cultivating H.E.R. Space team to discuss her latest offering Little Trouble Maker Defends Her Name, a deeply personal book about Luvvie’s steadfast pride in determing who she is told in a children’t format. Luvvie stops by the podcast to discuss how she decided at a young age that she would take pride in her name and honor the sacredness of owning your name. She offers wisdom about letting that deep sense of self guide your path as she connects the dots of her journey from blogger to New York Times bestselling author.
Lady, if you’re in need of a jolt of authentic inspration then this episode is one you won’t want to miss!
Quote of the Day:
"I have the confidence of a Black woman who WINS in spite of everything thrown at her. That confidence is grounding."
– Luvvie Ajayi Jones
Where to find Luvvie Ajayi Jones:
Website: www.awesomelyluvvie.com
Book: Little Trouble Maker Defends Her Name
Patreon: Luvvie Ajayi Jones
Instagram: @luvvie
LinkedIn: Luvvie Ajayi Jones
Goal Map Like a Pro Workbook
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cultivating-h-e-r-space-uplifting-conversations-for-the-black-woman--5470036/support.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
On this week's episode of Cultivating her Space.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
I want the confidence of a dope black woman who
is of age, who has been through Helen back and
has now found heaven on Earth.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
I want her confidence.
Speaker 4 (00:17):
Hey lady, have you ever felt like the world just
doesn't get you? Well, we do.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Welcome to Cultivating her Space, the podcast dedicated to uplifting
and empowering women like you.
Speaker 4 (00:31):
We're your hosts, doctor Dominique Brussard and educator and psychologists.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
And Terry Lomax, a techie and transformational speaker.
Speaker 4 (00:40):
Join us every week for authentic conversations about everything from
fibroids to fake friends. As we create space for black
women to just be.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Before we dive in, make sure you hit that follow
button and leave us a quick five star review. Lady,
we are black founded and black owned, and your support
will help us reach even more women like you.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
Now, let's get into this week's episode of Cultivating her Space.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
If you're feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure of your next steps,
this is for you. Hey, lady, is Tea here and
I just want to invite you to my free goal
map like a pro coaching workshop, where I'll share the
five proven steps to get unstuck and achieve your goals.
Whether you're feeling overwhelmed by all your ideas, juggling scattered ideas,
(01:32):
or maybe you just need confidence to start, this workshop
will give you the clarity, tools and the motivation to
take back control. Reserve your spot for free by visiting
her spacepodcast dot com and clicking on the goal map
like a pro webinar link. Lady, don't miss this chance
to build a roadmap that fits your life and set
you up for success. I hope to see you there, lady.
(01:56):
Today's episode is dedicated to everyone whose name was never
on a keychain and yet still shines like one of one. Okay,
we are joined by a literary force who has mastered
the art of turning truth into transformation. Lovey At Jaihie
Jones is a four time New York Times bestselling author, speaker,
(02:17):
and book coach who thrives at the intersection of culture, business,
and leadership. She's CEO and Chief Creative Officer of All
Love Media and the founder of the Book Academy. She
has written five critically acclaimed best selling books, including her
banner book, Professional trouble Maker, The Fear Fighter manual in
(02:39):
her Little Troublemaker children's book series. Lovey is an internationally
recognized speaker whose thought leadership on culture, authenticity, and disruption
enables transformative action. Her renowned TED talk Get Comfortable with
Being Uncomfortable has over ten million views. It's also been
(03:00):
transcribed into twenty three languages, y'all, and it's placed her
in the top one percent of TED talks of all time. Okay,
the University of Illinois alum is a true force in
the world, and her work has been featured in such
outlets as Fortune, Forbes, Ink, Fast Company, The Chicago Tribune, Variety,
and many many more. Lovey, welcome to cultivating her space.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (03:27):
You're so welcome.
Speaker 4 (03:29):
We can't wait to dive into this conversation. And so
our quote of the day, Lovey, Our quote will sound
very familiar to you because these are your words.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
I mean, you're.
Speaker 4 (03:42):
Literary genius. How could we not find some of your
words to quote?
Speaker 3 (03:48):
All right?
Speaker 4 (03:49):
Our quote of the day. I have the confidence of
a black woman who wins in spite of everything thrown
at her. That confidence is grounding. I'm gonna say it
one more time for the folks in the back to
make sure you heard it. I have the confidence of
(04:11):
a black woman who wins in spite of everything thrown
at her. That confidence is grounding.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
All right, love you.
Speaker 4 (04:23):
Now, we know that today we are talking about your
latest children's book. But this quote felt so appropriate for
understanding this conversation. And so when you hear your words
reflected back to you, give us some context behind this quote.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
So yeah, no, it's actually crazy to see my words
use it when people quote me publicly. Is still kind
of weird, but it's it's because I'm like, man, no,
like I actually meant it. So this quote is important
to me because you see all the times when you
we're like you should have the confidence of mediocre white man.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
No, why would I want to have.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
The confidence of a mediocre white man that's so flavorless
and terrible, like unseasoned, Like I want everybody knows an
older black woman who you can't tell nothing, you can't
check her for nothing. I want her confidence like a
woman whose life has been a testament, has been proof
(05:24):
of God's glory, has been just like how she's climbed
and conquered mountains that we're supposed to have taken her out.
I want that confidence, not the milt toast fake stuff
that white men do. So that's I'm always like, I
want us to stop saying we want the confidence of
a white dude, Like why why would we want the
confidence of a white dude? Because it's also grifty. Confidence
(05:48):
is cheating people. Confidence, It is confidence that comes with
lineages of cruelty, right, So yeah, I don't want that confidence.
So yeah, I want the confidence of a dope black
woman who is of age, who has been through Helen
back and has now found heaven on Earth.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
I want her confidence. Yeah, oh too, Mike Drop.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
So you just we didn't know that you preached on Tuesdays,
but it's nice. It's nice to know that you do,
so Lovey. What we want to do first is we
want to know your origin story. How did you become
the Levey that sits before us today?
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Oh my gosh, I mean, the journey to today has
been long and winding. I feel like I've lived nine
different lives and I just turned forty in January. Like,
you know, I started blogging when I was in college.
That was two thousand and three, so twenty two years
ago I started my first blog. And unlike the other
(06:47):
people who peer pressured me and starting my blog.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
I never stopped.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
And when I graduated from college and I started my
career as a marketing coordinator in a nonprofit, I would
work from nine to five, and I come home and
write what I felt like. And some days it was
around what I watched on TV. Some days it was
around friendship, breakup. Someday it might have been about politics.
Some days it was about social justice, some day shenanigans.
(07:12):
It was just this blog that embodied the multitudes of
who I was.
Speaker 5 (07:17):
Like.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
I was never in a niche. I was never a
fashion blogger. I was never a gossip bloger. I was
never a TV blogger or a business blogger. I was everything.
Like I allowed my blog to really represent all the
things I was interested in, and.
Speaker 3 (07:31):
The blog kept on getting more and more attention.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
I got laid off my job April twenty ten, fifteen
years ago, and what initially shocked my system was really
God making me take the leap of faith. I wasn't
going to take myself, because really writing is where my
purpose was. Using my words to move hearts and minds
was where my real purpose was, Like making people laugh.
(07:56):
You know, one day they would be laughing at a
blog post on why yellow starbursts are the worst, and
then the day after that they'll see a post called
the stages of what happens when there's injustice against Black people.
So it was like people will find me with one
thing and then go deep into the world of Levy
and fall in love and be like, oh my gosh,
I came for your scandal recaps and then I ended
(08:18):
up reading your social justice pieces and they touched my
spirit right, So it was like I would use humor
to get people's defenses down, and then why their defenses
was down, talk about some real stuff, and no matter
how unsure I was about blogging, because at that point,
blogging was not a real career for people even writing,
because I remember even then, I had a hard time
(08:40):
calling myself a writer.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
Because I was like, a writer is Tony Morrison?
Speaker 4 (08:49):
Right?
Speaker 3 (08:50):
And how dare I?
Speaker 2 (08:51):
How can I ever compare myself to Tony Morrison? She
uses the same title. I can't use that. So for
a long time I even fought the writer title of
it all because I just didn't think I qualified.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
I didn't think the type.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Of work that I was doing was valid enough to
use that title. But even if I was afraid of
the title, I still did the work. So in spite
of whatever my thoughts were hang ups around the title,
I was still writing most days, and my blog just
kept on getting bigger and bigger, and the Scandal recaps
really did pop off too, Like people will.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Watch Scandal Thursday nights, Friday mornings.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
That was parked on my blog trying to find out
what I said about Scandal, and those recaps got so
prominent that I found out the cast of Scandal used
to be reading my recaps while they were on set.
Shonda Rhymes started paying attention, like starting following me on Twitter.
Speaker 4 (09:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
It was crazy, like.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
They literally were like we're on People would message me
and be like, just so you know, I work on
the set of Scandal. They're sitting on set reading your
recaps right now the last episode. And that was wild
and that's how Shonda Rhymes got to know who I was.
But yeah, twenty fourteen, which is two years after Scandal started,
I got an email from a book agent who was like,
I read your blog. There's books here, and I was like,
(10:04):
I know signed with him. That was October twenty fourteen.
I wrote my book proposal. I think I finished it
January twenty fifteen. We started sending it out February. I
got my first book deal March, so it was like
less than six months after he sent me that message,
(10:26):
I had a book deal. Even though the book was
the proposal was rejected by eleven editors because they all
thought it was too risky. So when I finally when
the one editor said yes, I say, all, I bet
I know. My goal here is to make the other
It's to make the people realize they made a mistake
when they said no to me.
Speaker 3 (10:43):
And I took that book.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
I'm judging you to do better, man you, and I
put it on my back and I was like, I
want this book to kill so that other people who
look like me can be taken seriously when they walk
into an agency, so they don't have to wonder, you know,
whether their work is their work matters. And honestly that
was my driving force because I was like, bet, y'all
don't think we okay?
Speaker 3 (11:03):
Cool?
Speaker 2 (11:04):
So then I put I pushed it in with everything
I had and instantly hit the times. Just when it
came out September twenty sixteen, that book has sold over
one hundred thousand copies. That book changed publishing in a
major way because editors started telling me that, like, your
book is in everybody's book proposal now as a comparative title.
Like I know people got seven figure checks off the
(11:25):
back of my book, and.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
I'm like, that's what I wanted it to do, right.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
So and then twenty seventeen, I got invited to do
a TED talk, a TED official talk. I said no
a few times because I was afraid of it bombing,
and then I did this talk that really was was
about us not making decisions based on fear. It was
the talk that I used that talk to drag myself basically, and.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
It hit like a month after it.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Went live, it had a million views, And that talk
changed my life in a different way.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
So my career has been.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Simply small steps of me saying yes to even if
I didn't know the plan, and then.
Speaker 3 (12:08):
Other doors opening as a result.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Then here I am twenty two years into this writing career.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
My fifth book, Little Troubmaker Defense Her Name, is about to.
Speaker 2 (12:18):
Come out, and I am now also helping other people
become successful authors. But the path has been a journey,
but it's been a good one.
Speaker 4 (12:32):
Wow, wow, Yeah, such an amazing journey.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
Yeah, yeah, what is.
Speaker 4 (12:43):
Something as you were recounting your journey, what's something that
stands out that that surprises you when you as you're
reflecting back.
Speaker 3 (12:59):
Something that surprises me? Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
Honestly, all the many moments where I had no idea
what was coming from my yes, that's probably my biggest surprise.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
There were so many times when I.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Didn't know what was next, Like I didn't have a
grand plan of like I'm gonna do this thing and
this thing.
Speaker 3 (13:24):
What happened from me then this other thing.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
No.
Speaker 3 (13:27):
I tell people like you know sometimes we want to write.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Five year plans and you're like, then I'm gonna do this.
I'm gonna strategize my life. I didn't strategize none of this.
I literally just took. I went step by step. If
something felt compelling, I would say all right, I'm gonna
try it. If something did not feel compelling, I'll say nah.
But like my career, I was always surprised by what
(13:50):
came from my yeses. So it was like me saying
yes to that Ted talk led to me getting and
it's still my best lead magnet ever for speaking, I
still get notes about that tech talk every day.
Speaker 3 (14:02):
I still have somebody mentioning it to me.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Oh my gosh, I discovered you through your ted talk
and it changed my life.
Speaker 1 (14:08):
You know.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
So that shocked me because I never thought, you know,
that teed talk was gonna be that.
Speaker 3 (14:13):
I was like, okay, cool, I guess I'm gonna do
this teed talk.
Speaker 2 (14:16):
I was never expecting ten million views is crazy, like crazy.
And then the other thing is, and what's funny that
te talk ended up leading to really my book, because
Professional Troublemaker is my second book, and it's actually my
banner book. So a banner book is an author's book
that is their signature, right, So Professional Troublemaker of Fear
(14:39):
Fight Emmanual is my has become my banner book. And
when it was time to even name that book, and
I say, you know what, I'm gonna name this Professional Troublemaker,
what I did not realize was that those were the
first words I said.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
In my ted Talk. I'd actually forgotten that I had.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Said that, Like in my Ted Talk, I'm like, my
name's love you, Jay Jones, and I'm pfessional Troublemaker. I
did not recognize that until I named the book already
because I don't watch my own tech.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
Talk, Like when it first came out, I watched it
to make.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
Sure I look good and sounded okay, but I don't
will watch my own tet talk. So I had completely
forgotten that that's actually how I started that teed talk.
So it was like past me had left a crumb
for me to use and hold on to, and.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
That in itself was surprised.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
And I was like, and that's happened multiple times in
my career where I will say something or do something
and then I'll in a random, different moment, I'll be
looking at something and I go, oh, I already said
this six years ago. Oh, I already kind of set
the path. That always surprises me anytime it happens. But
it's it's so funny. It's like proof that our steps
are divinely ordered, that we nothing is by accident, right
(15:49):
like our time is never wasted. So I find that
all the time around my journey, and I'll be like, whoa,
I'll see a picture and I'll be like, oh my.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
Gosh, look at this thing. So yeah, that is so powerful.
I got goosebumps. So you said that, Oh my goodness. Okay,
So first off, the book is amazing and I lie
to you not lovely. These are the best illustrations I've
ever seen in a book.
Speaker 3 (16:13):
Really is it? Joey?
Speaker 1 (16:15):
Is that his name?
Speaker 3 (16:15):
Joey Joey's Fioto my illustrator.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
Listen, those illustrations are so on point. I love this
special shout out to Joe lof Rice in the book.
I said, you better go ahead, you better represent And
then the final touch at the end with the key chain,
I was like, it's so precious, so beautifully done. Amazing job.
So your book, Little Troublemaker Defends her Name, is dedicated
to those right whose names are rarely on keychains. Can
(16:39):
you share with us the earliest memory you have of
realizing that your name was powerful, even before others knew
how to honor it fully.
Speaker 3 (16:49):
Yeah, when I was nine.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
So I was born and raised in Nigeria, and we
moved to the United States when I was nine years old,
almost ten, and we moved to Chicago and like fall,
so it was like cold. So I come from Nigeria
where everybody looks like me, everybody sounds like me.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
My name is not strange.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
It actually is very common over there, and I stepped
into this classroom and I just instinctively knew that my
name was too different for that room. I wasn't ashamed
of my name at all. It was actually the contrary.
I felt like my name was too special for them
to have it. So nine year old me immediately when
(17:30):
they were like introduce yourself, I did like a two
second thing in my head and I was like, yep, no,
they can't have it. And I changed my name on
the spot because my first name is ethel Lua, which
means God's Love. And I immediately was like, they're not
gonna know what These kids are not gonna know what
that name is. I don't got time for this. So
I was like, my name is Levette, which is what
my uncle calls me as a nickname. So I said,
(17:51):
they can do that one. I know they can do
that one. I'm going to introduce myself as that. And
that's actually probably the first time that I made a
decision and a clear, conscious decision about my name. But
it wasn't grounded in any type of shame. It was
actually the contrary. It was me trying to protect this
thing that I felt was sacred, and you know, it
was it's such a big part of me that I
(18:13):
was like, I can't have them have access to that
part of me because I'd go home. You know, I
still bring jall rights to school. So it wasn't like
I was trying to not be a Nigerian girl. I
was just like, em, I can't trust y'all with how
you about to butcher this, so let me just let's
not even let's not even play that game. So yeah,
I believe that's probably the first time that I made
(18:33):
that decision and kind of had to deal with the
consequence of being different like that.
Speaker 4 (18:42):
I love that at nine you like listen to your intuition,
Like even if you weren't sure exactly where it was
coming from, you listen to your intuition. And I also
appreciate you saying that your name is sacred and that
everybody doesn't get access, everybody doesn't deserve access. Yeah, And
(19:08):
so like when when you think back to nine year
old loving, is there anything that you wish someone would
have told you or did for you in terms of
protecting your name? Like you did a good job of
protecting yourself, but is there something that you wish someone
(19:31):
would someone else would have said or did to protect
your name.
Speaker 3 (19:37):
MM, so that's a great question.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
You know. What's interesting is we talk about doing inner
child work, like we get older and older and you
realize that the work you actually need to do is
to reparent your younger self and be the adult that
the younger self needed. And honestly, I would say that
that's why I write my Little Troubmaker Yez, is to
reparent that little Lovey. And that's why I actually chose
(20:04):
to make sure her name was Little Lovey because the
things that are said to her in the books that
I write about her or for her are things that
I wish I would have heard. Like your name is
worth defending is the number one mission and message of
Little troub Maker defends her name, Like that is something
that I want to drum into the ears of kids,
Like I don't care what your name is.
Speaker 3 (20:26):
It is worth defending.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
It is worth standing up for, It is worth pronouncing correctly,
It is worth speaking up for. That is something that
I don't think I was ever told, right, I knew it,
like in the back of my head, you know, but
I was never explicitly told that.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
Because every.
Speaker 2 (20:46):
First day of school and I would go and introduce
myself to all my teachers because A Ji, I'm first
on the roster usually, and it was because I immediately
knew the moment they saw my name, they would add
burden to it where there might not be any.
Speaker 3 (21:01):
So literally, I would show.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
Up at school thirty minutes early every first day of school,
and I would go to every classroom and introduce myself
to their teachers and be like, I'm number one on
the roster.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
Here's how you say my name.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
And yet and still when it was time for roll call,
they would look at my name and be like, oh,
that one's hard.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
I just came and saw you like, and anytime we
had a substitute teacher.
Speaker 2 (21:24):
I would have to do it again and I'd be like,
here we go. So that's something that I think more
kids need to hear. I just did the first ever
book reading for this book at TIAA the other day,
and I read the book for the kids. And then
when it was time for Q and A, my rule was,
before you answer, before you ask me a question, I
(21:46):
want you to say your name loud and proud, and
then you asked me the question. And the times when
they were being quiet, I'd be like, no, say it louder,
and also I would repeat it to them to make
sure that they know that I'm trying to get their
name right. So I end up I think I end
up getting twenty questions and I make sure each kid
I asked them what their name was, and I'm like, okay,
(22:08):
cool like this and they're like yeah, and I'm like awesome,
So what's your question? That doesn't happen often a lot
of those kids are used to kids in general. If
your name is not Michael Joseph James, John Amy and
Mary Odds are, you had to deal with moments where
somebody felt like your name was too heavy right, where
they didn't feel like it was worth the effort.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
And I think after a lifetime of that does something
to you. A lifetime of that kind of hurts your
feelings because you're like, dang. And there are some people now.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
Who were grown who were like, yeah, I go by
because I just figured like that would just be easier
for them. It's not a I go by this because
I want to protect me. It's I go by that
because it'll be easier for them. And I'm like, dang,
imagine if when we were little, somebody actually said no, no, no.
If you feel like change your name because you want
(22:57):
to protect it, that's one thing. If you change your
name only because you think it's gonna be easy for
other people and you just want to just be like, fine,
I guess I'll go by Amy even though your name
is a Marie, right it is.
Speaker 3 (23:10):
That's when it's tough.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
So yeah, that's I want you know, all the little
all the little ones and even the big ones who
are listening to this, like, after a lifetime of getting
your name it's pronounced misspelled, and you've been irritated by it,
you and you've never been apologized to. It's why in
this book I actually have both the teacher and the
(23:32):
kid apologize to little Lovey.
Speaker 3 (23:34):
I made it a point to make sure she heard
I'm sorry. You're right.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
I shouldn't have done that, because I don't think any
of us have gotten apologies for all the ways in
which people have butchered our names. So she gets, she
gets all the things that I wanted to get.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
That's so powerful. What a great way to mirror the
reparenting process of yourself and protecting yourself and being the
you that you need it back then, that's so beautiful, now,
lovely this conversation. It's been great so far, but we
want to shift up the energy a little bit. Okay,
And because we recognize, appreciate, and celebrate the multifaceted woman,
and we believe that it's okay to be bougie, classy
(24:11):
and ratchet. You can still be elegant and dance to
strip club music if you so choose. We want to
invite you to the ou blatchet segment. Do you take
on the challenge?
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Let's go, all right, let's get it.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
So, now that you've agreed, we're going to tell you
what to expect. So we're going to ask you three questions.
We're going to share three sentence completions. And then Levey,
we have three photos pulled up a view that we're
going to share on the big screen. But we want
you to share. We want you to give us a
number out of one in three and we're going to
share that photo. And when we share the photo on
the big screen, we want you to describe the photo
for folks that are only listening to the audio. And
(24:44):
then we want you to give us some context about
the photo that we wouldn't know just by looking at.
Speaker 3 (24:49):
It all right.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
I like that, Okay, Going ease into the segment. The
first question is what is the best piece of wisdom
or advice you've ever received?
Speaker 2 (25:00):
Underpromise and over deliver? Mm yeah, like yeah, you know.
Ultimately it comes down to always.
Speaker 3 (25:08):
Blow folks minds.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
That's really what it comes because if you under promise
you do above and beyond, people's minds be blown as
opposed to you talking big game and then you're not
living up to it.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
That's how you disappoint folks.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
So I try to under promise and then I'll come
and blow your mind.
Speaker 4 (25:27):
Love that, Love that all right. So this next question
total shift from the words of wisdom. This is our
ratchet side, our blatchet side. When that DJ cues the music,
(25:48):
are you gonna twirk or two step?
Speaker 2 (25:52):
I'm a two stepper. I'm a two step girly. I'm
a two step girly. Uh huh, ain't not wrong? A
good two steps all right, lovey. Our next question, we
know you love a good shoe.
Speaker 1 (26:05):
Okay, we in the senior Instagram, we see them shoes
behind you over there. Okay, So the question here we're
gonna change up a little bit is what is the
sexiest shoe you own.
Speaker 3 (26:14):
Ooh, you know, probably the shoes I wore on my wedding.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
Are they out there back there? Oh, we're about to
get a little little visual.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
Actually, there's two person of shoes that I woant my
wedding actually in this mix.
Speaker 3 (26:31):
Yes, actually they're both bagsie mischiga. Oh so I just right.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
Oh so then the dress off side, Oh yeah, the
dress stick, the blin is blinking right, these are these
are the two. Yeah, because I wore this for my
night during wedding and I wore this for the Western wedding.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
So yeah, the bassie mister.
Speaker 1 (26:56):
Is come on wedding shoes to see it?
Speaker 4 (27:00):
Is all right now lady, if you are listening to
the audio only, then that means you need to go
out ahead and become a Patreon subscriber so that you
can see this video and you could see these shoes.
Speaker 3 (27:14):
Yep.
Speaker 4 (27:15):
All right, So we're gonna move on to our sentence completion.
One question or topic I wish people asked me about
more often? Is damn, that's good.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
You know, shoes probably did ask People don't ask you
enough about shoes. They don't, They really don't. So I'm
actually glad y'all asked me about shoes. A lot of
people do not ask me about my shoes enough.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
That is an amazing levey.
Speaker 3 (27:47):
I mean, listen, a part of me I want to
shoot collection one day. That's one of my.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Oh and jewelry also, people don't ask me about jewelry enough.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
Well, you know, it's so crazy, you're not gonna believe this, levee.
The next sentence completion is what I would tell y'all
about shoes and jewelry.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
Is you lying? I want to see lying, but I'm lying,
but I want to hear you.
Speaker 5 (28:08):
I hear your answer.
Speaker 3 (28:11):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (28:14):
I think more of us need to like be into
jewelry because there's such great adornments, right. I feel like
to be adorned is to kind of be adored a bit,
even if you're being adored by you.
Speaker 3 (28:26):
So I just, yeah, people might.
Speaker 2 (28:29):
Consider that shallow, but I actually think it's something that
makes you feel.
Speaker 3 (28:35):
A bit more.
Speaker 2 (28:36):
Adorned is the word, and adorned feels like crowned to me.
So yeah, okay, I'm with it.
Speaker 4 (28:44):
I feel that, Okay, okay, all right, and now our
last sentence completion. What I love most about myself.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
Is how I smile with my whole face. Yes, it's
my favorite thing about myself. Like I have crows feet
and laugh lines and I'm forty and I'm like, you
know what, it is an honor to live a life
that has created crows feet from smiling and laughing with
my whole face. And I think it's something that I
(29:14):
walk into rooms with. And yeah, I think that's my
favorite piece about myself.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
That is so beautiful, so beautiful. Okay, so we're moving
into our last part of this segment, so love. We
got these photos, fold up, these photos. These some badass photos. Okay,
I'm gonna tell you, oh my gosh, they're so so cute.
But we want you to choose a number out of
one and three so we can share that one particular photo.
So what number are you going with?
Speaker 3 (29:37):
Two?
Speaker 1 (29:39):
I'm so glad you said this. Okay, So we're gonna
share the photo. I'm gonna share the other big screen,
and if you can give some context behind the photo first,
or actually describe the photo so the folks who are
not tuning into the video can see what you talk
about and then give us some context, that would be amazing.
Look at this photo, y'all. Oh my gosh, ah, oh
my gosh.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (29:59):
Okay, So in this phone, I am wearing a white
leather turbine.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
I have on big hoop earrings.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
And this particular photo shows the top half of what
is actually a really beautiful wedding gown that I did
for a photo shoot a month before I got married
in twenty nineteen. And yeah, that photo's kind of dope.
I didn't go hold with you. That's dope.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Yes, it's so fire.
Speaker 2 (30:26):
We love it.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Thank you for thank you for playing along with the
oh you've blatche segment. Any other context you want to
share for this photo. In context, something needs to be
an art piece.
Speaker 2 (30:34):
Yes, so you know what, I can actually see it
being an art piece because I think the head piece
is what did it. Additional context is we were on
sets and so this dress was created by a black
owned designer named Lorii. Lori does beautiful gowns like she
really knows how to capture a woman's body in these
(30:56):
amazing wedding gowns, so like on your wedding day, you
can feel as beauty as possible.
Speaker 3 (31:00):
So we are on set.
Speaker 2 (31:02):
I'm getting my makeup done, and the stylist goes ooh.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
I feel like you'd be dope to like top this
gown off with a turbine. So the stylist.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
Really like leaves the photo shoot and goes to Michaels
to get this fabric. So this was like a last
minute addition to the look, but I think it really
elevated it, and that look ended up becoming the cover
photo for the magazine and news for Munna Luci Bride magazine.
Speaker 1 (31:28):
So yeah, yeah, the turbine definitely, Oh that was a
beautiful story. Think yes, the turban definitely did that. Oh
my goodness, thank you for playing along with the oh
you're black just segment with us. We appreciate you, and
just kind of hopping back into some man they other questions,
loving how do you personally navigate the balance between being
honest and being palatable, if that's something that you care
(31:50):
to balance in the first place, especially in spaces that
are not designed with us in mind.
Speaker 2 (31:56):
M navigating the balance. I don't actually think it's a
balance for me to navigate. I think I kind of
approach how I speak, how I talk, how I show
up with the idea that am I showing up as
the most thoughtful and truest version of myself, and the
thoughtful piece is important because of course you can be true.
(32:18):
But sometimes that's why I say brutal honesties. The truth
doesn't have to be brutal, right, it doesn't have to
be brutal. So can it be thoughtful truths? Yes, direct truths, absolutely,
I'm direct, but I also try to, you know, try
to be thoughtful. But beyond that, that's all I owe people.
Speaker 3 (32:39):
That's it.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
Like I can't owe palid. I can't say I'm gonna
be palatable, do you. I can't say that you're gonna
like me. I can't say that you're gonna love what
I'm gonna say, or how I even show up or
who I even am. And that's okay because it's not
my job, Like my purpose is not to be palatable,
and frankly, it should be nobody's purpose. Like we were
not born and placed on this earth to people please.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
We were born to pursue purpose.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
So purpose does not look like I need to acquiesce
everybody's thoughts. And humans are really fickle, so why would
I be bended myself backwards all the time to make
fickle human beings like me? The same ones who today
might like you tomorrow might not. The only thing that
I can guarantee is what I consider to be thoughtful truths,
and I will say it in the way that I
know how, and then if it rubs when not even if,
(33:27):
because it will rub somebody the wrong way at certain points.
My hope is that if those people are my people,
or people who are aligned with me values wise, did
they go what am I missing?
Speaker 3 (33:37):
Or they give grace?
Speaker 2 (33:40):
If there are people who weren't gonna like me anyway
because our values are not aligned, you weren't gonna like
whatever I said regardless.
Speaker 3 (33:46):
So yeah, we needed to hear that.
Speaker 4 (33:49):
Thank you, Yes, yes, and so lovey. You have spent
a career being bold and outspoken and targeting mostly adults, right,
and now you have your little Troublemaker series, and so
(34:13):
tell us what inspired you to switch it up or
add this facet to your writing collection.
Speaker 3 (34:24):
Oh man, it's been.
Speaker 2 (34:27):
A dream for me to do a kid's book for
a long time, but I hadn't prioritized it because I
was like, it'll be way down the line.
Speaker 3 (34:34):
I'm thinking it's going to be in five years. And
what's interesting is it's like when we came up with ideas.
Speaker 2 (34:41):
It's almost like it's like God will be like I
already knew that you wanted to do it.
Speaker 3 (34:46):
I'm going to enable this to happen.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
So fun fact, I was right after writing Troublemaker came
out my book for teenagers, so I did Professional Troublemaker.
Like a bunch of parents reached out to me. It
was like, man, I wish I had this book when
I was fifteen. I wish I had this book that
I could really give to my teenager and be able
to talk them through this moment where they feel into different.
(35:09):
And I was like I had so many parents hit
me up and teachers. So that's actually what led to
Rising Troublemaker, the one for teenagers. So then after Rising Troublemaker,
somebody on my team named Macy, who I've been working
with for seven years now, like, surprise me with the
little Troublemaker illustration.
Speaker 3 (35:28):
Right, like this little trub Maker is when I'm judging
you t shirt.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
She got jewels on like this is me shrank down
And I literally was like, Macy, how did you know?
I wanted to do a little version of me for
a while. So fun fact, the person who she got
to commission it. I said, is he taking more clients?
He's the one. This is Joey Spioto. So I said,
I have an idea for a Joey you damn to
(35:52):
do this with me. He was like yes, And between
when I got this as a gift and when the
first Little trumb Maker book comes out came out, which
was twenty twenty three, that was Little trump Maker Makes
a Mess. It was a year, which is crazy. Kids
books usually take like two to three years to develop.
I did this in twelve months. So it just felt aligned.
(36:13):
It felt like divine intervention and it felt so right.
And I mean since the book came out in twenty
twenty three, like I've had teachers reach out to me
and be like, my students are more thoughtful and empathetic
towards the Arab kid or I have twins who are
white and redhead, being like Little trump Maker looks just
(36:34):
like me, like you know. So it's just an affirmation
of the work of the work when we do not
allow ourselves to overthink, to have analysis paralysis, for when
it's divinely guided. So yeah, Little trump Maker is my jam.
I love doing it. And the third book is coming
out next year.
Speaker 1 (36:53):
You are on it. That's the inspiring Levey. And I'm
thinking about what you shared about your journey, how it
was not a straight path. You just kind of took
us and you're like, Okay, I'm going to do this
and make it be my guest. My question for you
is what do you have, like what advice do you
have or words of wisdom for the people who are
on the journey And it's the end in the meantime season,
so they haven't they don't have the ten million views
(37:16):
on the Ted Talk, they don't have the book idea,
but they're just in the they're doing the work, like
on the journey, they're committed to it, but they don't
see all of the results. What advice or words of
encouragement do you have for those people? You got to
keep doing the work, And I know that sounds cliche.
Speaker 2 (37:31):
There were many times in my journey where I was
seeing my peers win all these awards, being all these wombs,
being recognized, getting all these dope partnerships. There was a
point where I felt ignored, where I felt like I
was banging my head against the wall, where I felt
like invisible and had I quit during those times, I
(37:54):
wouldn't have these times. So that's also why don't obsess
about the stratag to get to the next level. Just
do really good work consistently. And that's one thing that
I've been doing. If there's I mean, of course, there
are people who don't like me. We all have people
who don't like us. There's somebody somewhere who probably cannot
stand me. But the thing they cannot deny is that
(38:17):
I have worked my butt off to get where I am.
That when other people quit blogging, when other people deleted
their websites, when they went quiet for years, I.
Speaker 3 (38:27):
Was the person who was consistently there.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
Even if I wasn't blogging every day anymore, even if
I wasn't on social media every day, I had my newsletter.
I've always poured into my audience consistently, whether or not
somebody was paying attention or not. So yeah, for those
of you who are in your waiting period of like
I'm waiting to pop or I'm waiting for this thing
to shake, just keep doing what feels compelling and write.
(38:55):
That's all you can do, and then doors will open
when you kind of down on that. Like, So the
ones who are known Francesca Ramsey, for example, is another
creator who's been added. Now I know Francesca her not
wearing pannel with Easa Ray and twenty twelve together, you
know what I mean. So Francisca's been around for a
long time because she never stopped while her peers stopped.
(39:15):
Francesca being consistent, been on it will give you a
good YouTube via on a hot second, was on TikTok
when it started. Like, the ones who are consistent and excellent,
not perfect excellent, are the ones who win. So think
about ways to excel, think about ways to constantly get
better at your craft and just put your head down
and get the work done.
Speaker 4 (39:38):
Yes, yes, consistency, persistence, yes.
Speaker 3 (39:45):
And so.
Speaker 4 (39:47):
As I'm listening to that message and thinking about all
the little ones out there and thinking about the message
that that you give in your book, what's something, what's
the what's the long lasting message that you want the
(40:09):
little troublemakers out there to take away from this particular book.
Speaker 2 (40:17):
I mean that you can always stand up for yourself thoughtfully.
So like her mistake in this book is that she
pops off on the boy who pops off on her right,
she called him a dummy, because he made find.
Speaker 4 (40:28):
Her normal reaction.
Speaker 3 (40:30):
Yep, normal reaction.
Speaker 2 (40:31):
But my girl got to always learn she could do
things better than she did, She could be more thoughtful.
She's not wrong for defending herself. She can do it
more thoughtfully. So for Little trump Maker in general, Little
Lovey those books. One of the things that I promise,
no matter how many books I end up writing about
Little Lovey, is that she will never be humbled. She
will never be humbled. She will always walk away knowing, Okay,
(40:54):
I made a mistake and I grew because of it,
not I am a mistake, which is problem that a
lot of us end up internalizing. When we were little,
your mistakes felt like indictments and personality like hits. Where
for her, she'll go, Okay, I made a mistake. I
learned how to do it better and different for next time.
(41:17):
But I still feel loved. So after every every mistake
that she makes, she will always walk away still feeling
loved and still knowing that she was not somebody who's
worth throwing away. So that is a big, big, big
message out of any of the books, from Little Troubmaker
Makes a Mess to this one, is that Little Lovey
(41:37):
with her big heart that gets her in big trouble.
She will always feel loved, she will never be humbled,
and she will always grow and be better.
Speaker 1 (41:48):
So, beautiful Love, we appreciate you. We thank you for
your gifts, how you pour into the community, all that
you're doing in the world, and we are so excited
for this book launch. We wish you the best, and
we just thank you so much for your time.
Speaker 3 (42:01):
Listen.
Speaker 2 (42:01):
This book means a lot to me because these are
the messages that, when internalized, it can actually change the
trajectory of these kids who take it on now because
we're so used to hearing about the confidence gap or
hearing kids, you know, be less confident about who they are.
(42:23):
And the confidence gap, by the way, starts at eight,
especially for girls. So the genders, they're usually neck and neck,
and then something happens at eight where it completely tanks
for girls. And my hope is that as a result
of girls, especially meeting Little Levey across my books, that
(42:45):
they don't get that confidence gap, and that's actually why
we are so my success metrics for this book is
different from the other books. It's not just about hitting
the Times list, but my goal is to get ten
thousand copies of this book into the hands of kids
run the country without their parents and their teachers having
to pay for it. So we're doing a sponsorship train
(43:06):
to get this into schools. We have members of my
audience actually paying and sponsoring class from worth of books
or even five books, and we're sending it to teachers
who don't have the budget because they're already underpaid strapped
for cash. So if you were listening to this and
you want to be a part of our sponsorship train,
(43:26):
just go to sponsor Little Troublemaker dot com. We are
so far we've gotten We're twenty percent there. Two thousand
books are being sent into classrooms, and a lot of
these books are starting these kids' libraries. So a teacher
messaged me and said she gave a copy to a kid,
and this kid was like, do I get to keep
(43:47):
it forever? Because it was her first book that this
kid would actually not have to bring back to school.
This is yours, put your name on it, do whatever
you want with it. So you know, that is the
one way that I would really love people to support
outside of buying their own copies, if you can.
Speaker 3 (44:00):
Even as Lula is one hundred dollars.
Speaker 2 (44:03):
Help us sponsor some classroom books that we can send
to programs, especially to kids who usually not gifted things
like books. So sponsor Little Troublemaker dot com. Join us
like it would be so meaningful. So that's the way
that I'm like, I.
Speaker 3 (44:19):
Ain't too prid to beg help us get to ten thousand.
Speaker 2 (44:22):
Let's help these kids out, and let's let them know
that they're seeing this little black girl with a fade,
who is confident, who is cute, who is smart, who
is loved. Okay, she can be a mirror for them
to know that this can be their story too.
Speaker 4 (44:40):
Oh, thank you so much, Lovey. We have thoroughly and
enjoyed this interview with you. And tell folks if they
aren't already following you, which if they're not, I don't
know why they're not where they should have been following
you from way back when. Tell them where they can
(45:02):
find you.
Speaker 2 (45:03):
Yes, find me all of the internets, y'all. I am
at Lovey l U v v I E on all platforms.
But I think even more meaningfully, you can sign up
for my newsletter. My newsletter is where I really am
able to pour into people and talk about my reflections,
my recommendations, and how I am moving through this world
(45:24):
as a purpose driven leader, woman, wife, boss, friend, and
you know my newsletters at loveletter dot com, l U
V V L E T e R dot com. But yeah,
I'm I'm so easy to find, y'all. I'm literally one
of the most easy people to find on the internets.
If you actually google one word my first name, all
(45:45):
my stuff comes up one word, So I'm officially one word.
Speaker 1 (45:50):
There you go, There you go, the one name club.
Come on, come on. We'll make sure we add these
links in the show notes so everyone can support and
join the sponsorship train, join the newsletter, by the book,
all that good stuff. But we thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (46:06):
No, thank y'all for having me.
Speaker 2 (46:07):
It's very mandful when people tap on and say, hey,
we trust you with our platform.
Speaker 3 (46:12):
Come join us for a good Kiki.
Speaker 2 (46:14):
And I appreciate y'all for inviting me and having me on.
Speaker 3 (46:18):
So appreciate y'all.
Speaker 1 (46:20):
You're so welcome.
Speaker 3 (46:21):
Thank you.
Speaker 5 (46:24):
Hey, lady, it's doctor Dom here from the Cultivating her
Space podcast. Are you currently a resident of the state
of California and contemplating starting your therapy journey? Well, if
so please reach out to me at doctor Dominique Brusard
dot com. That's d r D O M I N
(46:45):
I q U E B R O U S S
A r D dot com to schedule a free fifteen
minute consultation. I look forward to hearing from you. Thanks
for tuning into Cultivating her Space. Remember that while this
podcast is all about healing, empowerment, and resilience, it's not
(47:10):
a substitute for therapy. If you or someone you know
need support, check out resources like Therapy for Black Girls
or Psychology Today. If you love today's episode, do us
a favor and share it with a friend who needs
some inspiration, or leave us a quick five star review.
Your support means the world to us and helps keep
(47:32):
this space thriving.
Speaker 1 (47:34):
And before we meet again, repeat after me. My actions
are aligned with purpose leading to continuous transformation. Keep thriving, lady,
and tune in next Friday for more inspiration from Cultivating
her Space. In the meantime, be sure to connect with
us on Instagram at her Space Podcast
On this week's episode of Cultivating her Space.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
I want the confidence of a dope black woman who
is of age, who has been through Helen back and
has now found heaven on Earth.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
I want her confidence.
Speaker 4 (00:17):
Hey lady, have you ever felt like the world just
doesn't get you? Well, we do.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Welcome to Cultivating her Space, the podcast dedicated to uplifting
and empowering women like you.
Speaker 4 (00:31):
We're your hosts, doctor Dominique Brussard and educator and psychologists.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
And Terry Lomax, a techie and transformational speaker.
Speaker 4 (00:40):
Join us every week for authentic conversations about everything from
fibroids to fake friends. As we create space for black
women to just be.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Before we dive in, make sure you hit that follow
button and leave us a quick five star review. Lady,
we are black founded and black owned, and your support
will help us reach even more women like you.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
Now, let's get into this week's episode of Cultivating her Space.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
If you're feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure of your next steps,
this is for you. Hey, lady, is Tea here and
I just want to invite you to my free goal
map like a pro coaching workshop, where I'll share the
five proven steps to get unstuck and achieve your goals.
Whether you're feeling overwhelmed by all your ideas, juggling scattered ideas,
(01:32):
or maybe you just need confidence to start, this workshop
will give you the clarity, tools and the motivation to
take back control. Reserve your spot for free by visiting
her spacepodcast dot com and clicking on the goal map
like a pro webinar link. Lady, don't miss this chance
to build a roadmap that fits your life and set
you up for success. I hope to see you there, lady.
(01:56):
Today's episode is dedicated to everyone whose name was never
on a keychain and yet still shines like one of one. Okay,
we are joined by a literary force who has mastered
the art of turning truth into transformation. Lovey At Jaihie
Jones is a four time New York Times bestselling author, speaker,
(02:17):
and book coach who thrives at the intersection of culture, business,
and leadership. She's CEO and Chief Creative Officer of All
Love Media and the founder of the Book Academy. She
has written five critically acclaimed best selling books, including her
banner book, Professional trouble Maker, The Fear Fighter manual in
(02:39):
her Little Troublemaker children's book series. Lovey is an internationally
recognized speaker whose thought leadership on culture, authenticity, and disruption
enables transformative action. Her renowned TED talk Get Comfortable with
Being Uncomfortable has over ten million views. It's also been
(03:00):
transcribed into twenty three languages, y'all, and it's placed her
in the top one percent of TED talks of all time. Okay,
the University of Illinois alum is a true force in
the world, and her work has been featured in such
outlets as Fortune, Forbes, Ink, Fast Company, The Chicago Tribune, Variety,
and many many more. Lovey, welcome to cultivating her space.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (03:27):
You're so welcome.
Speaker 4 (03:29):
We can't wait to dive into this conversation. And so
our quote of the day, Lovey, Our quote will sound
very familiar to you because these are your words.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
I mean, you're.
Speaker 4 (03:42):
Literary genius. How could we not find some of your
words to quote?
Speaker 3 (03:48):
All right?
Speaker 4 (03:49):
Our quote of the day. I have the confidence of
a black woman who wins in spite of everything thrown
at her. That confidence is grounding. I'm gonna say it
one more time for the folks in the back to
make sure you heard it. I have the confidence of
(04:11):
a black woman who wins in spite of everything thrown
at her. That confidence is grounding.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
All right, love you.
Speaker 4 (04:23):
Now, we know that today we are talking about your
latest children's book. But this quote felt so appropriate for
understanding this conversation. And so when you hear your words
reflected back to you, give us some context behind this quote.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
So yeah, no, it's actually crazy to see my words
use it when people quote me publicly. Is still kind
of weird, but it's it's because I'm like, man, no,
like I actually meant it. So this quote is important
to me because you see all the times when you
we're like you should have the confidence of mediocre white man.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
No, why would I want to have.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
The confidence of a mediocre white man that's so flavorless
and terrible, like unseasoned, Like I want everybody knows an
older black woman who you can't tell nothing, you can't
check her for nothing. I want her confidence like a
woman whose life has been a testament, has been proof
(05:24):
of God's glory, has been just like how she's climbed
and conquered mountains that we're supposed to have taken her out.
I want that confidence, not the milt toast fake stuff
that white men do. So that's I'm always like, I
want us to stop saying we want the confidence of
a white dude, Like why why would we want the
confidence of a white dude? Because it's also grifty. Confidence
(05:48):
is cheating people. Confidence, It is confidence that comes with
lineages of cruelty, right, So yeah, I don't want that confidence.
So yeah, I want the confidence of a dope black
woman who is of age, who has been through Helen
back and has now found heaven on Earth.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
I want her confidence. Yeah, oh too, Mike Drop.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
So you just we didn't know that you preached on Tuesdays,
but it's nice. It's nice to know that you do,
so Lovey. What we want to do first is we
want to know your origin story. How did you become
the Levey that sits before us today?
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Oh my gosh, I mean, the journey to today has
been long and winding. I feel like I've lived nine
different lives and I just turned forty in January. Like,
you know, I started blogging when I was in college.
That was two thousand and three, so twenty two years
ago I started my first blog. And unlike the other
(06:47):
people who peer pressured me and starting my blog.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
I never stopped.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
And when I graduated from college and I started my
career as a marketing coordinator in a nonprofit, I would
work from nine to five, and I come home and
write what I felt like. And some days it was
around what I watched on TV. Some days it was
around friendship, breakup. Someday it might have been about politics.
Some days it was about social justice, some day shenanigans.
(07:12):
It was just this blog that embodied the multitudes of
who I was.
Speaker 5 (07:17):
Like.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
I was never in a niche. I was never a
fashion blogger. I was never a gossip bloger. I was
never a TV blogger or a business blogger. I was everything.
Like I allowed my blog to really represent all the
things I was interested in, and.
Speaker 3 (07:31):
The blog kept on getting more and more attention.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
I got laid off my job April twenty ten, fifteen
years ago, and what initially shocked my system was really
God making me take the leap of faith. I wasn't
going to take myself, because really writing is where my
purpose was. Using my words to move hearts and minds
was where my real purpose was, Like making people laugh.
(07:56):
You know, one day they would be laughing at a
blog post on why yellow starbursts are the worst, and
then the day after that they'll see a post called
the stages of what happens when there's injustice against Black people.
So it was like people will find me with one
thing and then go deep into the world of Levy
and fall in love and be like, oh my gosh,
I came for your scandal recaps and then I ended
(08:18):
up reading your social justice pieces and they touched my
spirit right, So it was like I would use humor
to get people's defenses down, and then why their defenses
was down, talk about some real stuff, and no matter
how unsure I was about blogging, because at that point,
blogging was not a real career for people even writing,
because I remember even then, I had a hard time
(08:40):
calling myself a writer.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
Because I was like, a writer is Tony Morrison?
Speaker 4 (08:49):
Right?
Speaker 3 (08:50):
And how dare I?
Speaker 2 (08:51):
How can I ever compare myself to Tony Morrison? She
uses the same title. I can't use that. So for
a long time I even fought the writer title of
it all because I just didn't think I qualified.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
I didn't think the type.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Of work that I was doing was valid enough to
use that title. But even if I was afraid of
the title, I still did the work. So in spite
of whatever my thoughts were hang ups around the title,
I was still writing most days, and my blog just
kept on getting bigger and bigger, and the Scandal recaps
really did pop off too, Like people will.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Watch Scandal Thursday nights, Friday mornings.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
That was parked on my blog trying to find out
what I said about Scandal, and those recaps got so
prominent that I found out the cast of Scandal used
to be reading my recaps while they were on set.
Shonda Rhymes started paying attention, like starting following me on Twitter.
Speaker 4 (09:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:42):
It was crazy, like.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
They literally were like we're on People would message me
and be like, just so you know, I work on
the set of Scandal. They're sitting on set reading your
recaps right now the last episode. And that was wild
and that's how Shonda Rhymes got to know who I was.
But yeah, twenty fourteen, which is two years after Scandal started,
I got an email from a book agent who was like,
I read your blog. There's books here, and I was like,
(10:04):
I know signed with him. That was October twenty fourteen.
I wrote my book proposal. I think I finished it
January twenty fifteen. We started sending it out February. I
got my first book deal March, so it was like
less than six months after he sent me that message,
(10:26):
I had a book deal. Even though the book was
the proposal was rejected by eleven editors because they all
thought it was too risky. So when I finally when
the one editor said yes, I say, all, I bet
I know. My goal here is to make the other
It's to make the people realize they made a mistake
when they said no to me.
Speaker 3 (10:43):
And I took that book.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
I'm judging you to do better, man you, and I
put it on my back and I was like, I
want this book to kill so that other people who
look like me can be taken seriously when they walk
into an agency, so they don't have to wonder, you know,
whether their work is their work matters. And honestly that
was my driving force because I was like, bet, y'all
don't think we okay?
Speaker 3 (11:03):
Cool?
Speaker 2 (11:04):
So then I put I pushed it in with everything
I had and instantly hit the times. Just when it
came out September twenty sixteen, that book has sold over
one hundred thousand copies. That book changed publishing in a
major way because editors started telling me that, like, your
book is in everybody's book proposal now as a comparative title.
Like I know people got seven figure checks off the
(11:25):
back of my book, and.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
I'm like, that's what I wanted it to do, right.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
So and then twenty seventeen, I got invited to do
a TED talk, a TED official talk. I said no
a few times because I was afraid of it bombing,
and then I did this talk that really was was
about us not making decisions based on fear. It was
the talk that I used that talk to drag myself basically, and.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
It hit like a month after it.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
Went live, it had a million views, And that talk
changed my life in a different way.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
So my career has been.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Simply small steps of me saying yes to even if
I didn't know the plan, and then.
Speaker 3 (12:08):
Other doors opening as a result.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Then here I am twenty two years into this writing career.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
My fifth book, Little Troubmaker Defense Her Name, is about to.
Speaker 2 (12:18):
Come out, and I am now also helping other people
become successful authors. But the path has been a journey,
but it's been a good one.
Speaker 4 (12:32):
Wow, wow, Yeah, such an amazing journey.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
Yeah, yeah, what is.
Speaker 4 (12:43):
Something as you were recounting your journey, what's something that
stands out that that surprises you when you as you're
reflecting back.
Speaker 3 (12:59):
Something that surprises me? Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
Honestly, all the many moments where I had no idea
what was coming from my yes, that's probably my biggest surprise.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
There were so many times when I.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Didn't know what was next, Like I didn't have a
grand plan of like I'm gonna do this thing and
this thing.
Speaker 3 (13:24):
What happened from me then this other thing.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
No.
Speaker 3 (13:27):
I tell people like you know sometimes we want to write.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Five year plans and you're like, then I'm gonna do this.
I'm gonna strategize my life. I didn't strategize none of this.
I literally just took. I went step by step. If
something felt compelling, I would say all right, I'm gonna
try it. If something did not feel compelling, I'll say nah.
But like my career, I was always surprised by what
(13:50):
came from my yeses. So it was like me saying
yes to that Ted talk led to me getting and
it's still my best lead magnet ever for speaking, I
still get notes about that tech talk every day.
Speaker 3 (14:02):
I still have somebody mentioning it to me.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Oh my gosh, I discovered you through your ted talk
and it changed my life.
Speaker 1 (14:08):
You know.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
So that shocked me because I never thought, you know,
that teed talk was gonna be that.
Speaker 3 (14:13):
I was like, okay, cool, I guess I'm gonna do
this teed talk.
Speaker 2 (14:16):
I was never expecting ten million views is crazy, like crazy.
And then the other thing is, and what's funny that
te talk ended up leading to really my book, because
Professional Troublemaker is my second book, and it's actually my
banner book. So a banner book is an author's book
that is their signature, right, So Professional Troublemaker of Fear
(14:39):
Fight Emmanual is my has become my banner book. And
when it was time to even name that book, and
I say, you know what, I'm gonna name this Professional Troublemaker,
what I did not realize was that those were the
first words I said.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
In my ted Talk. I'd actually forgotten that I had.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Said that, Like in my Ted Talk, I'm like, my
name's love you, Jay Jones, and I'm pfessional Troublemaker. I
did not recognize that until I named the book already
because I don't watch my own tech.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
Talk, Like when it first came out, I watched it
to make.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
Sure I look good and sounded okay, but I don't
will watch my own tet talk. So I had completely
forgotten that that's actually how I started that teed talk.
So it was like past me had left a crumb
for me to use and hold on to, and.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
That in itself was surprised.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
And I was like, and that's happened multiple times in
my career where I will say something or do something
and then I'll in a random, different moment, I'll be
looking at something and I go, oh, I already said
this six years ago. Oh, I already kind of set
the path. That always surprises me anytime it happens. But
it's it's so funny. It's like proof that our steps
are divinely ordered, that we nothing is by accident, right
(15:49):
like our time is never wasted. So I find that
all the time around my journey, and I'll be like, whoa,
I'll see a picture and I'll be like, oh my.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
Gosh, look at this thing. So yeah, that is so powerful.
I got goosebumps. So you said that, Oh my goodness. Okay,
So first off, the book is amazing and I lie
to you not lovely. These are the best illustrations I've
ever seen in a book.
Speaker 3 (16:13):
Really is it? Joey?
Speaker 1 (16:15):
Is that his name?
Speaker 3 (16:15):
Joey Joey's Fioto my illustrator.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
Listen, those illustrations are so on point. I love this
special shout out to Joe lof Rice in the book.
I said, you better go ahead, you better represent And
then the final touch at the end with the key chain,
I was like, it's so precious, so beautifully done. Amazing job.
So your book, Little Troublemaker Defends her Name, is dedicated
to those right whose names are rarely on keychains. Can
(16:39):
you share with us the earliest memory you have of
realizing that your name was powerful, even before others knew
how to honor it fully.
Speaker 3 (16:49):
Yeah, when I was nine.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
So I was born and raised in Nigeria, and we
moved to the United States when I was nine years old,
almost ten, and we moved to Chicago and like fall,
so it was like cold. So I come from Nigeria
where everybody looks like me, everybody sounds like me.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
My name is not strange.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
It actually is very common over there, and I stepped
into this classroom and I just instinctively knew that my
name was too different for that room. I wasn't ashamed
of my name at all. It was actually the contrary.
I felt like my name was too special for them
to have it. So nine year old me immediately when
(17:30):
they were like introduce yourself, I did like a two
second thing in my head and I was like, yep, no,
they can't have it. And I changed my name on
the spot because my first name is ethel Lua, which
means God's Love. And I immediately was like, they're not
gonna know what These kids are not gonna know what
that name is. I don't got time for this. So
I was like, my name is Levette, which is what
my uncle calls me as a nickname. So I said,
(17:51):
they can do that one. I know they can do
that one. I'm going to introduce myself as that. And
that's actually probably the first time that I made a
decision and a clear, conscious decision about my name. But
it wasn't grounded in any type of shame. It was
actually the contrary. It was me trying to protect this
thing that I felt was sacred, and you know, it
was it's such a big part of me that I
(18:13):
was like, I can't have them have access to that
part of me because I'd go home. You know, I
still bring jall rights to school. So it wasn't like
I was trying to not be a Nigerian girl. I
was just like, em, I can't trust y'all with how
you about to butcher this, so let me just let's
not even let's not even play that game. So yeah,
I believe that's probably the first time that I made
(18:33):
that decision and kind of had to deal with the
consequence of being different like that.
Speaker 4 (18:42):
I love that at nine you like listen to your intuition,
Like even if you weren't sure exactly where it was
coming from, you listen to your intuition. And I also
appreciate you saying that your name is sacred and that
everybody doesn't get access, everybody doesn't deserve access. Yeah, And
(19:08):
so like when when you think back to nine year
old loving, is there anything that you wish someone would
have told you or did for you in terms of
protecting your name? Like you did a good job of
protecting yourself, but is there something that you wish someone
(19:31):
would someone else would have said or did to protect
your name.
Speaker 3 (19:37):
MM, so that's a great question.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
You know. What's interesting is we talk about doing inner
child work, like we get older and older and you
realize that the work you actually need to do is
to reparent your younger self and be the adult that
the younger self needed. And honestly, I would say that
that's why I write my Little Troubmaker Yez, is to
reparent that little Lovey. And that's why I actually chose
(20:04):
to make sure her name was Little Lovey because the
things that are said to her in the books that
I write about her or for her are things that
I wish I would have heard. Like your name is
worth defending is the number one mission and message of
Little troub Maker defends her name, Like that is something
that I want to drum into the ears of kids,
Like I don't care what your name is.
Speaker 3 (20:26):
It is worth defending.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
It is worth standing up for, It is worth pronouncing correctly,
It is worth speaking up for. That is something that
I don't think I was ever told, right, I knew it,
like in the back of my head, you know, but
I was never explicitly told that.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
Because every.
Speaker 2 (20:46):
First day of school and I would go and introduce
myself to all my teachers because A Ji, I'm first
on the roster usually, and it was because I immediately
knew the moment they saw my name, they would add
burden to it where there might not be any.
Speaker 3 (21:01):
So literally, I would show.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
Up at school thirty minutes early every first day of school,
and I would go to every classroom and introduce myself
to their teachers and be like, I'm number one on
the roster.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
Here's how you say my name.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
And yet and still when it was time for roll call,
they would look at my name and be like, oh,
that one's hard.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
I just came and saw you like, and anytime we
had a substitute teacher.
Speaker 2 (21:24):
I would have to do it again and I'd be like,
here we go. So that's something that I think more
kids need to hear. I just did the first ever
book reading for this book at TIAA the other day,
and I read the book for the kids. And then
when it was time for Q and A, my rule was,
before you answer, before you ask me a question, I
(21:46):
want you to say your name loud and proud, and
then you asked me the question. And the times when
they were being quiet, I'd be like, no, say it louder,
and also I would repeat it to them to make
sure that they know that I'm trying to get their
name right. So I end up I think I end
up getting twenty questions and I make sure each kid
I asked them what their name was, and I'm like, okay,
(22:08):
cool like this and they're like yeah, and I'm like awesome,
So what's your question? That doesn't happen often a lot
of those kids are used to kids in general. If
your name is not Michael Joseph James, John Amy and
Mary Odds are, you had to deal with moments where
somebody felt like your name was too heavy right, where
they didn't feel like it was worth the effort.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
And I think after a lifetime of that does something
to you. A lifetime of that kind of hurts your
feelings because you're like, dang. And there are some people now.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
Who were grown who were like, yeah, I go by
because I just figured like that would just be easier
for them. It's not a I go by this because
I want to protect me. It's I go by that
because it'll be easier for them. And I'm like, dang,
imagine if when we were little, somebody actually said no, no, no.
If you feel like change your name because you want
(22:57):
to protect it, that's one thing. If you change your
name only because you think it's gonna be easy for
other people and you just want to just be like, fine,
I guess I'll go by Amy even though your name
is a Marie, right it is.
Speaker 3 (23:10):
That's when it's tough.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
So yeah, that's I want you know, all the little
all the little ones and even the big ones who
are listening to this, like, after a lifetime of getting
your name it's pronounced misspelled, and you've been irritated by it,
you and you've never been apologized to. It's why in
this book I actually have both the teacher and the
(23:32):
kid apologize to little Lovey.
Speaker 3 (23:34):
I made it a point to make sure she heard
I'm sorry. You're right.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
I shouldn't have done that, because I don't think any
of us have gotten apologies for all the ways in
which people have butchered our names. So she gets, she
gets all the things that I wanted to get.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
That's so powerful. What a great way to mirror the
reparenting process of yourself and protecting yourself and being the
you that you need it back then, that's so beautiful, now,
lovely this conversation. It's been great so far, but we
want to shift up the energy a little bit. Okay,
And because we recognize, appreciate, and celebrate the multifaceted woman,
and we believe that it's okay to be bougie, classy
(24:11):
and ratchet. You can still be elegant and dance to
strip club music if you so choose. We want to
invite you to the ou blatchet segment. Do you take
on the challenge?
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Let's go, all right, let's get it.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
So, now that you've agreed, we're going to tell you
what to expect. So we're going to ask you three questions.
We're going to share three sentence completions. And then Levey,
we have three photos pulled up a view that we're
going to share on the big screen. But we want
you to share. We want you to give us a
number out of one in three and we're going to
share that photo. And when we share the photo on
the big screen, we want you to describe the photo
for folks that are only listening to the audio. And
(24:44):
then we want you to give us some context about
the photo that we wouldn't know just by looking at.
Speaker 3 (24:49):
It all right.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
I like that, Okay, Going ease into the segment. The
first question is what is the best piece of wisdom
or advice you've ever received?
Speaker 2 (25:00):
Underpromise and over deliver? Mm yeah, like yeah, you know.
Ultimately it comes down to always.
Speaker 3 (25:08):
Blow folks minds.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
That's really what it comes because if you under promise
you do above and beyond, people's minds be blown as
opposed to you talking big game and then you're not
living up to it.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
That's how you disappoint folks.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
So I try to under promise and then I'll come
and blow your mind.
Speaker 4 (25:27):
Love that, Love that all right. So this next question
total shift from the words of wisdom. This is our
ratchet side, our blatchet side. When that DJ cues the music,
(25:48):
are you gonna twirk or two step?
Speaker 2 (25:52):
I'm a two stepper. I'm a two step girly. I'm
a two step girly. Uh huh, ain't not wrong? A
good two steps all right, lovey. Our next question, we
know you love a good shoe.
Speaker 1 (26:05):
Okay, we in the senior Instagram, we see them shoes
behind you over there. Okay, So the question here we're
gonna change up a little bit is what is the
sexiest shoe you own.
Speaker 3 (26:14):
Ooh, you know, probably the shoes I wore on my wedding.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
Are they out there back there? Oh, we're about to
get a little little visual.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
Actually, there's two person of shoes that I woant my
wedding actually in this mix.
Speaker 3 (26:31):
Yes, actually they're both bagsie mischiga. Oh so I just right.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
Oh so then the dress off side, Oh yeah, the
dress stick, the blin is blinking right, these are these
are the two. Yeah, because I wore this for my
night during wedding and I wore this for the Western wedding.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
So yeah, the bassie mister.
Speaker 1 (26:56):
Is come on wedding shoes to see it?
Speaker 4 (27:00):
Is all right now lady, if you are listening to
the audio only, then that means you need to go
out ahead and become a Patreon subscriber so that you
can see this video and you could see these shoes.
Speaker 3 (27:14):
Yep.
Speaker 4 (27:15):
All right, So we're gonna move on to our sentence completion.
One question or topic I wish people asked me about
more often? Is damn, that's good.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
You know, shoes probably did ask People don't ask you
enough about shoes. They don't, They really don't. So I'm
actually glad y'all asked me about shoes. A lot of
people do not ask me about my shoes enough.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
That is an amazing levey.
Speaker 3 (27:47):
I mean, listen, a part of me I want to
shoot collection one day. That's one of my.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Oh and jewelry also, people don't ask me about jewelry enough.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
Well, you know, it's so crazy, you're not gonna believe this, levee.
The next sentence completion is what I would tell y'all
about shoes and jewelry.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
Is you lying? I want to see lying, but I'm lying,
but I want to hear you.
Speaker 5 (28:08):
I hear your answer.
Speaker 3 (28:11):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (28:14):
I think more of us need to like be into
jewelry because there's such great adornments, right. I feel like
to be adorned is to kind of be adored a bit,
even if you're being adored by you.
Speaker 3 (28:26):
So I just, yeah, people might.
Speaker 2 (28:29):
Consider that shallow, but I actually think it's something that
makes you feel.
Speaker 3 (28:35):
A bit more.
Speaker 2 (28:36):
Adorned is the word, and adorned feels like crowned to me.
So yeah, okay, I'm with it.
Speaker 4 (28:44):
I feel that, Okay, okay, all right, and now our
last sentence completion. What I love most about myself.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
Is how I smile with my whole face. Yes, it's
my favorite thing about myself. Like I have crows feet
and laugh lines and I'm forty and I'm like, you
know what, it is an honor to live a life
that has created crows feet from smiling and laughing with
my whole face. And I think it's something that I
(29:14):
walk into rooms with. And yeah, I think that's my
favorite piece about myself.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
That is so beautiful, so beautiful. Okay, so we're moving
into our last part of this segment, so love. We
got these photos, fold up, these photos. These some badass photos. Okay,
I'm gonna tell you, oh my gosh, they're so so cute.
But we want you to choose a number out of
one and three so we can share that one particular photo.
So what number are you going with?
Speaker 3 (29:37):
Two?
Speaker 1 (29:39):
I'm so glad you said this. Okay, So we're gonna
share the photo. I'm gonna share the other big screen,
and if you can give some context behind the photo first,
or actually describe the photo so the folks who are
not tuning into the video can see what you talk
about and then give us some context, that would be amazing.
Look at this photo, y'all. Oh my gosh, ah, oh
my gosh.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (29:59):
Okay, So in this phone, I am wearing a white
leather turbine.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
I have on big hoop earrings.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
And this particular photo shows the top half of what
is actually a really beautiful wedding gown that I did
for a photo shoot a month before I got married
in twenty nineteen. And yeah, that photo's kind of dope.
I didn't go hold with you. That's dope.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Yes, it's so fire.
Speaker 2 (30:26):
We love it.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Thank you for thank you for playing along with the
oh you've blatche segment. Any other context you want to
share for this photo. In context, something needs to be
an art piece.
Speaker 2 (30:34):
Yes, so you know what, I can actually see it
being an art piece because I think the head piece
is what did it. Additional context is we were on
sets and so this dress was created by a black
owned designer named Lorii. Lori does beautiful gowns like she
really knows how to capture a woman's body in these
(30:56):
amazing wedding gowns, so like on your wedding day, you
can feel as beauty as possible.
Speaker 3 (31:00):
So we are on set.
Speaker 2 (31:02):
I'm getting my makeup done, and the stylist goes ooh.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
I feel like you'd be dope to like top this
gown off with a turbine. So the stylist.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
Really like leaves the photo shoot and goes to Michaels
to get this fabric. So this was like a last
minute addition to the look, but I think it really
elevated it, and that look ended up becoming the cover
photo for the magazine and news for Munna Luci Bride magazine.
Speaker 1 (31:28):
So yeah, yeah, the turbine definitely, Oh that was a
beautiful story. Think yes, the turban definitely did that. Oh
my goodness, thank you for playing along with the oh
you're black just segment with us. We appreciate you, and
just kind of hopping back into some man they other questions,
loving how do you personally navigate the balance between being
honest and being palatable, if that's something that you care
(31:50):
to balance in the first place, especially in spaces that
are not designed with us in mind.
Speaker 2 (31:56):
M navigating the balance. I don't actually think it's a
balance for me to navigate. I think I kind of
approach how I speak, how I talk, how I show
up with the idea that am I showing up as
the most thoughtful and truest version of myself, and the
thoughtful piece is important because of course you can be true.
(32:18):
But sometimes that's why I say brutal honesties. The truth
doesn't have to be brutal, right, it doesn't have to
be brutal. So can it be thoughtful truths? Yes, direct truths, absolutely,
I'm direct, but I also try to, you know, try
to be thoughtful. But beyond that, that's all I owe people.
Speaker 3 (32:39):
That's it.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
Like I can't owe palid. I can't say I'm gonna
be palatable, do you. I can't say that you're gonna
like me. I can't say that you're gonna love what
I'm gonna say, or how I even show up or
who I even am. And that's okay because it's not
my job, Like my purpose is not to be palatable,
and frankly, it should be nobody's purpose. Like we were
not born and placed on this earth to people please.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
We were born to pursue purpose.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
So purpose does not look like I need to acquiesce
everybody's thoughts. And humans are really fickle, so why would
I be bended myself backwards all the time to make
fickle human beings like me? The same ones who today
might like you tomorrow might not. The only thing that
I can guarantee is what I consider to be thoughtful truths,
and I will say it in the way that I
know how, and then if it rubs when not even if,
(33:27):
because it will rub somebody the wrong way at certain points.
My hope is that if those people are my people,
or people who are aligned with me values wise, did
they go what am I missing?
Speaker 3 (33:37):
Or they give grace?
Speaker 2 (33:40):
If there are people who weren't gonna like me anyway
because our values are not aligned, you weren't gonna like
whatever I said regardless.
Speaker 3 (33:46):
So yeah, we needed to hear that.
Speaker 4 (33:49):
Thank you, Yes, yes, and so lovey. You have spent
a career being bold and outspoken and targeting mostly adults, right,
and now you have your little Troublemaker series, and so
(34:13):
tell us what inspired you to switch it up or
add this facet to your writing collection.
Speaker 3 (34:24):
Oh man, it's been.
Speaker 2 (34:27):
A dream for me to do a kid's book for
a long time, but I hadn't prioritized it because I
was like, it'll be way down the line.
Speaker 3 (34:34):
I'm thinking it's going to be in five years. And
what's interesting is it's like when we came up with ideas.
Speaker 2 (34:41):
It's almost like it's like God will be like I
already knew that you wanted to do it.
Speaker 3 (34:46):
I'm going to enable this to happen.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
So fun fact, I was right after writing Troublemaker came
out my book for teenagers, so I did Professional Troublemaker.
Like a bunch of parents reached out to me. It
was like, man, I wish I had this book when
I was fifteen. I wish I had this book that
I could really give to my teenager and be able
to talk them through this moment where they feel into different.
(35:09):
And I was like I had so many parents hit
me up and teachers. So that's actually what led to
Rising Troublemaker, the one for teenagers. So then after Rising Troublemaker,
somebody on my team named Macy, who I've been working
with for seven years now, like, surprise me with the
little Troublemaker illustration.
Speaker 3 (35:28):
Right, like this little trub Maker is when I'm judging
you t shirt.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
She got jewels on like this is me shrank down
And I literally was like, Macy, how did you know?
I wanted to do a little version of me for
a while. So fun fact, the person who she got
to commission it. I said, is he taking more clients?
He's the one. This is Joey Spioto. So I said,
I have an idea for a Joey you damn to
(35:52):
do this with me. He was like yes, And between
when I got this as a gift and when the
first Little trumb Maker book comes out came out, which
was twenty twenty three, that was Little trump Maker Makes
a Mess. It was a year, which is crazy. Kids
books usually take like two to three years to develop.
I did this in twelve months. So it just felt aligned.
(36:13):
It felt like divine intervention and it felt so right.
And I mean since the book came out in twenty
twenty three, like I've had teachers reach out to me
and be like, my students are more thoughtful and empathetic
towards the Arab kid or I have twins who are
white and redhead, being like Little trump Maker looks just
(36:34):
like me, like you know. So it's just an affirmation
of the work of the work when we do not
allow ourselves to overthink, to have analysis paralysis, for when
it's divinely guided. So yeah, Little trump Maker is my jam.
I love doing it. And the third book is coming
out next year.
Speaker 1 (36:53):
You are on it. That's the inspiring Levey. And I'm
thinking about what you shared about your journey, how it
was not a straight path. You just kind of took
us and you're like, Okay, I'm going to do this
and make it be my guest. My question for you
is what do you have, like what advice do you
have or words of wisdom for the people who are
on the journey And it's the end in the meantime season,
so they haven't they don't have the ten million views
(37:16):
on the Ted Talk, they don't have the book idea,
but they're just in the they're doing the work, like
on the journey, they're committed to it, but they don't
see all of the results. What advice or words of
encouragement do you have for those people? You got to
keep doing the work, And I know that sounds cliche.
Speaker 2 (37:31):
There were many times in my journey where I was
seeing my peers win all these awards, being all these wombs,
being recognized, getting all these dope partnerships. There was a
point where I felt ignored, where I felt like I
was banging my head against the wall, where I felt
like invisible and had I quit during those times, I
(37:54):
wouldn't have these times. So that's also why don't obsess
about the stratag to get to the next level. Just
do really good work consistently. And that's one thing that
I've been doing. If there's I mean, of course, there
are people who don't like me. We all have people
who don't like us. There's somebody somewhere who probably cannot
stand me. But the thing they cannot deny is that
(38:17):
I have worked my butt off to get where I am.
That when other people quit blogging, when other people deleted
their websites, when they went quiet for years, I.
Speaker 3 (38:27):
Was the person who was consistently there.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
Even if I wasn't blogging every day anymore, even if
I wasn't on social media every day, I had my newsletter.
I've always poured into my audience consistently, whether or not
somebody was paying attention or not. So yeah, for those
of you who are in your waiting period of like
I'm waiting to pop or I'm waiting for this thing
to shake, just keep doing what feels compelling and write.
(38:55):
That's all you can do, and then doors will open
when you kind of down on that. Like, So the
ones who are known Francesca Ramsey, for example, is another
creator who's been added. Now I know Francesca her not
wearing pannel with Easa Ray and twenty twelve together, you
know what I mean. So Francisca's been around for a
long time because she never stopped while her peers stopped.
(39:15):
Francesca being consistent, been on it will give you a
good YouTube via on a hot second, was on TikTok
when it started. Like, the ones who are consistent and excellent,
not perfect excellent, are the ones who win. So think
about ways to excel, think about ways to constantly get
better at your craft and just put your head down
and get the work done.
Speaker 4 (39:38):
Yes, yes, consistency, persistence, yes.
Speaker 3 (39:45):
And so.
Speaker 4 (39:47):
As I'm listening to that message and thinking about all
the little ones out there and thinking about the message
that that you give in your book, what's something, what's
the what's the long lasting message that you want the
(40:09):
little troublemakers out there to take away from this particular book.
Speaker 2 (40:17):
I mean that you can always stand up for yourself thoughtfully.
So like her mistake in this book is that she
pops off on the boy who pops off on her right,
she called him a dummy, because he made find.
Speaker 4 (40:28):
Her normal reaction.
Speaker 3 (40:30):
Yep, normal reaction.
Speaker 2 (40:31):
But my girl got to always learn she could do
things better than she did, She could be more thoughtful.
She's not wrong for defending herself. She can do it
more thoughtfully. So for Little trump Maker in general, Little
Lovey those books. One of the things that I promise,
no matter how many books I end up writing about
Little Lovey, is that she will never be humbled. She
will never be humbled. She will always walk away knowing, Okay,
(40:54):
I made a mistake and I grew because of it,
not I am a mistake, which is problem that a
lot of us end up internalizing. When we were little,
your mistakes felt like indictments and personality like hits. Where
for her, she'll go, Okay, I made a mistake. I
learned how to do it better and different for next time.
(41:17):
But I still feel loved. So after every every mistake
that she makes, she will always walk away still feeling
loved and still knowing that she was not somebody who's
worth throwing away. So that is a big, big, big
message out of any of the books, from Little Troubmaker
Makes a Mess to this one, is that Little Lovey
(41:37):
with her big heart that gets her in big trouble.
She will always feel loved, she will never be humbled,
and she will always grow and be better.
Speaker 1 (41:48):
So, beautiful Love, we appreciate you. We thank you for
your gifts, how you pour into the community, all that
you're doing in the world, and we are so excited
for this book launch. We wish you the best, and
we just thank you so much for your time.
Speaker 3 (42:01):
Listen.
Speaker 2 (42:01):
This book means a lot to me because these are
the messages that, when internalized, it can actually change the
trajectory of these kids who take it on now because
we're so used to hearing about the confidence gap or
hearing kids, you know, be less confident about who they are.
(42:23):
And the confidence gap, by the way, starts at eight,
especially for girls. So the genders, they're usually neck and neck,
and then something happens at eight where it completely tanks
for girls. And my hope is that as a result
of girls, especially meeting Little Levey across my books, that
(42:45):
they don't get that confidence gap, and that's actually why
we are so my success metrics for this book is
different from the other books. It's not just about hitting
the Times list, but my goal is to get ten
thousand copies of this book into the hands of kids
run the country without their parents and their teachers having
to pay for it. So we're doing a sponsorship train
(43:06):
to get this into schools. We have members of my
audience actually paying and sponsoring class from worth of books
or even five books, and we're sending it to teachers
who don't have the budget because they're already underpaid strapped
for cash. So if you were listening to this and
you want to be a part of our sponsorship train,
(43:26):
just go to sponsor Little Troublemaker dot com. We are
so far we've gotten We're twenty percent there. Two thousand
books are being sent into classrooms, and a lot of
these books are starting these kids' libraries. So a teacher
messaged me and said she gave a copy to a kid,
and this kid was like, do I get to keep
(43:47):
it forever? Because it was her first book that this
kid would actually not have to bring back to school.
This is yours, put your name on it, do whatever
you want with it. So you know, that is the
one way that I would really love people to support
outside of buying their own copies, if you can.
Speaker 3 (44:00):
Even as Lula is one hundred dollars.
Speaker 2 (44:03):
Help us sponsor some classroom books that we can send
to programs, especially to kids who usually not gifted things
like books. So sponsor Little Troublemaker dot com. Join us
like it would be so meaningful. So that's the way
that I'm like, I.
Speaker 3 (44:19):
Ain't too prid to beg help us get to ten thousand.
Speaker 2 (44:22):
Let's help these kids out, and let's let them know
that they're seeing this little black girl with a fade,
who is confident, who is cute, who is smart, who
is loved. Okay, she can be a mirror for them
to know that this can be their story too.
Speaker 4 (44:40):
Oh, thank you so much, Lovey. We have thoroughly and
enjoyed this interview with you. And tell folks if they
aren't already following you, which if they're not, I don't
know why they're not where they should have been following
you from way back when. Tell them where they can
(45:02):
find you.
Speaker 2 (45:03):
Yes, find me all of the internets, y'all. I am
at Lovey l U v v I E on all platforms.
But I think even more meaningfully, you can sign up
for my newsletter. My newsletter is where I really am
able to pour into people and talk about my reflections,
my recommendations, and how I am moving through this world
(45:24):
as a purpose driven leader, woman, wife, boss, friend, and
you know my newsletters at loveletter dot com, l U
V V L E T e R dot com. But yeah,
I'm I'm so easy to find, y'all. I'm literally one
of the most easy people to find on the internets.
If you actually google one word my first name, all
(45:45):
my stuff comes up one word, So I'm officially one word.
Speaker 1 (45:50):
There you go, There you go, the one name club.
Come on, come on. We'll make sure we add these
links in the show notes so everyone can support and
join the sponsorship train, join the newsletter, by the book,
all that good stuff. But we thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (46:06):
No, thank y'all for having me.
Speaker 2 (46:07):
It's very mandful when people tap on and say, hey,
we trust you with our platform.
Speaker 3 (46:12):
Come join us for a good Kiki.
Speaker 2 (46:14):
And I appreciate y'all for inviting me and having me on.
Speaker 3 (46:18):
So appreciate y'all.
Speaker 1 (46:20):
You're so welcome.
Speaker 3 (46:21):
Thank you.
Speaker 5 (46:24):
Hey, lady, it's doctor Dom here from the Cultivating her
Space podcast. Are you currently a resident of the state
of California and contemplating starting your therapy journey? Well, if
so please reach out to me at doctor Dominique Brusard
dot com. That's d r D O M I N
(46:45):
I q U E B R O U S S
A r D dot com to schedule a free fifteen
minute consultation. I look forward to hearing from you. Thanks
for tuning into Cultivating her Space. Remember that while this
podcast is all about healing, empowerment, and resilience, it's not
(47:10):
a substitute for therapy. If you or someone you know
need support, check out resources like Therapy for Black Girls
or Psychology Today. If you love today's episode, do us
a favor and share it with a friend who needs
some inspiration, or leave us a quick five star review.
Your support means the world to us and helps keep
(47:32):
this space thriving.
Speaker 1 (47:34):
And before we meet again, repeat after me. My actions
are aligned with purpose leading to continuous transformation. Keep thriving, lady,
and tune in next Friday for more inspiration from Cultivating
her Space. In the meantime, be sure to connect with
us on Instagram at her Space Podcast
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