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July 25, 2025 79 mins

“Every one of us walking onto that property was nervous.”

So says one man on this episode, describing his experiencing attending his first in-person men's retreat.

If you've ever felt intimidated or unsure about doing in-person work with other men, you're far from alone. In the words of one man on this panel, “There’s a shared understanding of the brutality between men.”

But it doesn't have to stay that way. There can be a kind and loving experience of brotherhood.

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Come to the retreat!

It's August 8th - September 1st in Northern California (about 2 hours north of San Francisco). We work hard to keep it financially accessible, and payment plans are available.

As one man put it in this episode, “If you’re thinking about going, you’re already there.”

https://evolutionary.men/retreat/

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Work with us

Want to go deeper than the podcast? Jason and I are ready to work with you! We specialize in helping men break old patterns and transform their sex & love lives for good.

To see if there's a fit for our flagship program Pillars of Presence, book a call here. Start anytime. (https://evolutionary.men/apply/)

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Memorable quotes from this episode:

  • “I never felt like other boys.”
  • "I wanted to be vulnerable and open, but I didn’t know how, and I wasn’t sure I could.”
  • “I was nervous as hell.”
  • “We lived on cheesy jokes and greasy burgers.”
  • “I was deathly afraid to become a terrible father.”
  • “I cried tears of joy for the first time in my life.”
  • “I realized — through all the work I’ve been doing, therapy, self-reflection, etc. — how much love I have for myself (finally).”
  • “I went into a panic because I’m having flashbacks of summer camp.”
  • “If we’re gonna talk about this trauma, we might as well do it in the hot tub!”
  • “There was racism even within my own church.”
  • “When I was a boy, there was never any spiritual or deep, emotional holding by men in my life.”
  • “Part of going to the retreat was to build my nervous system into more resilience.”
  • “We’re going to be there no matter what.”
  • “I can accept other men’s unconditional love, and it helped me know how to provide unconditional love to other men.”
  • “I used to use my intellect to defend myself or talk my way out of things.”
  • “I came into the first retreat a very tough nut to crack.”
  • “There’s now a level of connection now with my wife that I can’t even describe.”
  • “The dynamic within my whole family has changed.”
  • “There is hope with change.”
  • “You’ll make friends.”
  • “Come for the food; stay for the healing.”
  • “You WILL experience a transformation.”
  • “This is where you get your master’s degree in men’s work.”
  • “Just get there.”
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