493- Fall in Love With Your Spouse Again: Kay’s Story

Fall in Love With Your Spouse Again: Kay’s Story

Marriage is one of God’s most beautiful gifts—and one of His most powerful tools for growth and sanctification. But even after decades of love and commitment, many couples find themselves asking the quiet question:

What happened to us?

Maybe you're feeling distant from your spouse.
Maybe you’re still under the same roof—but it feels like you're living parallel lives.
Maybe you’ve stopped hoping things can change.

That’s where Kay was after 33 years of marriage.
But her story is a powerful reminder: It is possible to fall in love again—and to restore love in a marriage that feels broken.

When You Feel Stuck in Your Marriage

Kay and her husband had built a wonderful life: children, a family business, retirement, and shared dreams. But beneath it all, their connection was quietly dissolving.

Kay shared with us, “We weren’t arguing every day, but there was tension. There was distance. He finally told me, ‘If this is what the next 20 years are going to look like—I don’t want it.’”

Their marriage wasn’t hostile—but it was cold.

No more playfulness.
No more laughter.
And for Kay, no clear idea of what to do next.

Christian Marriage Healing Starts in the Heart

One night, Kay came across our podcast. She listened to a wife share her story—and saw her own reflection in the words. That night, she played the episode for her husband.

Both of them ended up in tears.

That was the moment God began softening her heart. But what came next wasn’t a joint effort. It wasn’t couples therapy. It was one wife, taking one faithful step forward.

Kay didn’t wait for her husband to change.

She didn’t try to force him into a process.

She simply said yes to the work God wanted to do in her. And that’s what began to heal everything.

How to Save Your Marriage Alone—One Surrender at a Time

There’s a common lie in marriage restoration: If my spouse won’t change, there’s no hope.

But Kay’s story offers a different story: Sometimes the most powerful transformations happen when one spouse surrenders first.

As she worked through the DYM program, she began seeing all the ways she had unintentionally pushed her husband away—through resentment, control, harshness, and silence.

“I didn’t realize how disrespectful I had become. How little admiration I showed. I had no idea how my own attitude was closing his heart off from me.”

Through prayer, scripture, and community, God began to soften her heart. And without pushing, demanding, or even explaining—it softened his too.

“He started coming home earlier. Laughing again. Helping more. And I never once asked him to.”

When you let God begin with you, healing has a way of rippling outward.

Biblical Marriage Advice for Wives Who Feel Disconnected

When you’ve been married a long time, it’s easy to assume the disconnection is just part of life.

But biblical marriage advice doesn’t teach resignation—it teaches hope, humility, and the power of the Holy Spirit to change hearts.

If you're feeling distant from your spouse, here are some biblical truths and tools Kay leaned into:

• Let go of resentment. Carrying old pain closes the heart. Forgiveness opens it again.

• Replace criticism with admiration. Noti