Join Joel and Andy with guest Jason Brick, author of “Safest Family on the Block: 101 tips, tricks, hacks, and habits to protect your family”. Jason shares practical safety advice from experts, discussing everything from debunking “stranger danger” to simple car safety hacks like spare shoes. A key focus is becoming a trusted resource for...
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Just a quick message before we get into this episode.
While all of our shows are normally kid-friendly, family-friendly, and we love kids and love that they listen to our show,
the guest in this episode used a few words that may not be appropriate for all ages of ears.
So just a word of warning, you may want to listen first before listening in the car with your little kiddos.
(00:21):
On this episode of the Dudes and Dads podcast, we talk with our friend Jason Brick about safety.
Joel!
Andrew.
How are you doing today?
Well, I think you said it earlier, but it's been a long day.
It has, man.
(00:42):
This time of year especially is just, I don't know, it just seems tough with all of the stuff going on.
I have amnesia about this season every year that we enter into it and we're like, oh right, a lot of things going on.
And, you know, the weather right now is sunny one day and very not the other.
(01:02):
So we're figuring it out.
We'll get through it.
Eventually it'll be morning.
May is here.
Maybe that means new things.
Hey everybody, welcome to the Dudes and Dads podcast.
Glad to have each and every one of you along for the ride.
Glad to have our conversation that we're going to have.
(01:23):
And Andy, I'm particularly glad to be across the table from you.
It seems like it's been a while, but it's only last week of recorded last episode.
So we're, we're, uh, we're in rapid succession here.
We are.
Yeah.
But, uh, so Joel, we had a conversation last week about college grads and their jobs and all of that good stuff.
(01:43):
Yes.
Why, why young people are struggling to maintain their employment out of college and why certain business leaders are saying, I cannot hire these people.
I won't hire these people.
And, uh, and just, it was a little bit of a generational black ball as I, as I think I put it.
(02:05):
So we did get feedback, voicemail feedback, and we appreciate that.
So Steven has let us called in.
Are you talking about the Steven Berkey?
I am.
And so let's listen to that.
Hey, Andy and Joel, this is Steven.
Um, just listened to your latest episode about the 20 somethings, uh, struggling in the job world and, uh, appreciate it.
(02:30):
It was really interesting conversation.
Uh, I thought I'd leave a little bit of feedback, um, regarding that, not directly regarding that, but in my job as I work at a, as a lender at a bank, um, I've had multiple times.
Where I've had, uh, mid to late 20 somethings that need a loan for a car or house that instead of them calling me up and asking the questions, setting up the appointments, it's been mom or dad, uh, doing that.
(02:58):
As a parent of a teenager, I'm not there yet, but I always think on those situations, you know, I think we're kind of doing a disservice if that's the case.
Um, at that point, uh, certainly mom and dad, I think can be great, uh, guide given advice.
Um, but at some point you gotta kind of let them, uh, run on their own.
(03:18):
Um, and if you're going to hold their hand through it, I think we're, we're maybe doing a bit of a disservice.
Um, so anyway, just wanted to throw that two cents in there.
Um, you know, maybe a challenge as a parent, you know, certainly want to equip them, but at some point they got to stand on their own two feet.
So thanks guys.
Appreciate the show.
Thanks.
Steven Berkey coming through big time on the voicemail.
(03:39):
Yes.
That's wow.
I, Andy, I had not even considered that.
I had not even considered that dynamic.
And wow.
From, uh, from somebody who's, who's in the banking world working through the lending.
I mean, I can't even imagine Andy.
I don't even know when I having my parents at that age call in right for me.
(03:59):
Right.
And I understand helping out a little bit for them to call in, but if you have voicemail,
we would love to talk to you, uh, hear your voicemail.
Five, seven, four, five, oh, one, four, four, six, seven is our voicemail number.
Five, seven, four, five, zero, one, four, four, six, seven.
Join, join the crowd.
Get on board with, with Steven Berkey.
(04:22):
Leave the voicemail.
That was Steven.
I just have to say that was fantastic.
Love the, love the feedback.
I hope it inspires more because we, we just love, we love to hear the thoughts.
That's great.
Awesome.
So thank you, Steven, for calling that in.
And tonight we are talking with a returning guest, Jason Brick, Jason, welcome.
Dudes and Dads podcast alumni, Jason, congratulations.
(04:45):
You're amongst the few of the proud and the repeat offenders.
Thank you so much for having a, uh, taking the time to be with us.
We appreciate it.
Outstanding.
Thank you very much.
It's always good to be a recidivist.
Yeah.
He's he, he escaped the program and has found him his way, his way back in further, for further
treatment.
Yeah.
So, so for, for, for, for reference, we had you back on season four, episode 18, where we
(05:12):
were talking about keeping our families safe.
And that was all the way back in 2002.
Holy smoke.
And so you have changed, you have changed back then.
You had no hair on the top of your head and you have a full, full lock of hair right now.
So, and Jason, I have to say, I was, uh, pleasantly, I don't know if it was a pleasantly
alarmed by the, the flowing locks.
It's really, uh, it's striking a little bit of gray in there perhaps too.
(05:36):
So, uh, watch out.
Oh goodness.
It's, uh, it's a good one.
It happened when, uh, we watched John wick and I asked my wife, Hey, you know, cause
I'm midlife crisis age.
Yeah.
Do you think I could pull off, pull that off?
The, the John wick hair.
Yeah.
And she got a little cash in her throat and said, Oh, better try.
(05:57):
Oh, here we are.
Well, here we are.
Oh, nicely done.
So, so lots has happened since 2002.
Uh, do you mean 22?
Yes.
And 2002, all the things.
Yes.
So much has happened since 2022 though.
Yes.
But you've written a book.
Tell me a little bit about the book.
(06:17):
Sure thing.
So when I come on last time, I had just started my podcast, safest family on the block, where
I found as many experts from as many different fields as I possibly could to tell me about
keeping my family safe.
And that would be a EMS captain one week, a police officer, the next, but you know, where
a lot of people think about safety, but I'd also get on a suicide counselor and a nutritionist
(06:42):
and a driving instructor.
Yes.
Anybody from any area.
And then I got together the 101 most important things that I learned from them all.
Oh, nice.
Nice.
And wrote it into this here book, which comes out on Tuesday.
See, I learned how to keep my family safe, not how to properly.
Lighting is everything, but yes.
(07:05):
There you go.
You're right.
That's perfect.
You're right.
Yeah.
And that comes out Tuesday, uh, this coming Tuesday, which I want to say is the fifth or
the sixth, six, six through a YMAA publishing.
Nice.
Great.
Nice.
Yeah.
So, you know, uh, we always, anytime anybody's authored it, we've had an author on here with
(07:26):
the book.
We, I always like to ask the question, like, what was your process in putting this together?
Was it, you just went through every expert and you just condensed what they had said, or
was there kind of a, uh, Oh, like an internal organizing principle or how you assembled your
content?
Well, for this one, the, um, the book was always in mind from the very first interview
(07:47):
and I envisioned it as a 101 tips structure, which is what it ended up keeping, which is
really rare when you start a book that it actually resembles the original brief, original brief.
Um, but in this case I just kept an Excel file open and for every interview I take the one
or two most important points.
And one of the things I wanted to do was keep taking off the conceptual things, but, uh, the
(08:11):
stuff that's actually a thing you can do.
And so I try to mine one or two out of every episode, every, every interview.
And then when I had a hundred good ones, I started writing the book.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I, uh, I, uh, as he's saying this, uh, Andy, I think to myself, uh, we should have done that.
(08:32):
Yeah.
We're like seven seasons.
Yeah.
It's like, you know, gosh, we should go back through and look at all the things that people
have told us that might be of some use to people.
If we just put it all together.
Yeah.
That's a, that's, that's pretty wild.
What, um, you know, as this book and we obviously in our previous interview, which, you know,
(08:53):
gosh, every time we have a returning guest, Andy, I just think to myself, time just flies.
Like I would not have, if you would have asked me how, how long ago we had the first interview,
I would have been like, Oh, not that long ago.
Well, I got the email from Jason a little while ago and I kind of, I like, we were so super
busy at the time and I didn't, I didn't respond to it, but I was like, when I saw it, I was
like, man, that's a throwback.
(09:15):
When did we actually have him on?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Three years ago.
Three years ago.
Um, and so Jason in this time, I mean, since we last talked till now, you know, as you think
about, uh, the, the kind of the commitments and the time that you've given to really having
this kind of safest family on the block conversation, what, what has developed in your mind?
(09:37):
Have there been, have there been some new insights that you've gained, maybe previous
understandings that you've had that you've, you've shifted on what has been the learning
experience, uh, for you, uh, in this process as you've interviewed all these people again.
And I think the amazing part is all these folks that have real life on the ground experience,
I'm sure that have, cause you've gotten a book out of it, like have real practical ideas,
(10:00):
but as you've interacted with, with the various, your various guests and have had these conversations,
what's sort of been your thought journey kind of from beginning to where you are now?
So one of the big ones is I found out that the baddest asses on the planet are some of the
nicest, most giving humans.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
You know, you got in talking to special forces operators, veteran cops, martial arts masters,
(10:24):
talk to a spy, a former CIA agent, and they were all so friendly and kind and giving it's
to the point where if I meet somebody who says they're a tough guy and they're mean, I doubt
the tough guy credentials.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Um, yeah.
One of the big changes that impacted my parenting and, you know, I come to this from my first
(10:48):
career was in martial arts, security consulting, doing some body, God works and bouncing and then
into journalism.
But so a lot of this stuff was a little familiar to me or required tweaking, but one place that
really changed was, I mean, after I talked to a lot of mental health experts, communications
experts, uh, that idea that a lot of us, cause we're about the same age.
(11:10):
We, you know, we grew up in families where if we got in trouble at school, we were going
to get in more trouble at home.
A hundred percent.
Yes, absolutely.
That our parents felt it was their responsibility to make our bad day worse.
And I, you know, my two kids, they're 10 years apart and I raised the first one under
that model.
(11:31):
And then I've learned better from talking to experts about being that trusted resource
for your kids.
That if your kid gets into a fight at school or finds out they're getting an F, they don't
come home going, Oh God, just dreading telling us or just really sweating bullets.
Cause they know the teacher made the call, but they come home knowing that, Hey, we're going
(11:53):
to have a sit down.
I'm going to get a hug and we're going to figure it out together.
And I'm not saying to, you know, shield them from the consequences, but we need to
first not add additional arbitrary con consequences at home.
The world's going to treat them mean enough and then walk with them to handle the meaningful
(12:16):
natural consequences with discipline and grace and maturity.
Yeah.
And that's, that's not how I was raised by my parents.
That's not how y'all were raised by your parents.
I don't think a lot of parents of people, our age raises that way.
And it's not because they were bad people.
It's because they hadn't learned.
That wasn't the way you raise good kids back then.
Yeah.
But I found through a lot of these interviews that now we know better and now I'm doing
(12:40):
better to the point that I apologized to my oldest kid.
And we actually, between us, we call him the rough draft.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, the eldest child is a little bit of a Guinea pig, a little bit of a Guinea pig.
We like to think we get better as we go along.
Which is funny because my youngest is always like, it's not fair.
You don't know what it's like to be the youngest.
I'm like, you have no idea what it's like to be the oldest.
Let me tell you.
(13:01):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That rough, that rough draft face is a doozy, my friend.
Yeah.
And it's, you know, it's not just, um, you know, touchy feely woo woo stuff either,
but it's also safety, safety related because if your kid learns in first grade that if he
gets in a fight on the playground and you're going to be a resource instead of a threat,
that means in eighth grade, ninth grade, when she's first thing, first gets offered drugs,
(13:29):
she's going to come talk to about that.
And in sixth, sixth grade, you know, or not sixth grade, 16th grade, you know, sophomore,
sophomore, junior year, when she's serious about her first boyfriend and is thinking about
physical steps, she's going to listen to your advice, whether or not she directly seeks it.
And it also means when she's 27 and she's married to that guy who hit her once.
(13:52):
Yeah.
She's not going to try to keep that a secret from you.
Yeah.
She's going to come to you and ask what to do.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Being a, I think that that topic has actually come up on this show a lot in one way or the
other, being a safe place for our kids, being a trusted resource for them.
And, uh, in the wild world of parenting these days where it feels like, uh, it, it is a really,
(14:14):
and you know, it's a really intentional endeavor to stay ahead of the, you know, stay, have the
ball and be aware of the world in which our, our kids are facing.
Something that is different than the world in which we grew up as you've, as you've absolutely
pointed out, even in terms of mindsets and of, you know, parenting approaches.
Um, the, uh, I think it can be easy to get a little bit overwhelmed in knowing all the right
(14:40):
moves to make, but, but the one overlapping, I think right, right move we can make is to be
available is to be available is to be a trusted is to be a trusted place for our kids.
Um, and maybe, and I mean, and not even necessarily the, the place for all the right answers,
you know, either.
Um, right.
I think it's important for our kids to know that we don't have all of the right answers,
(15:03):
but we're here and we'll explore these things together.
Yeah.
It's more of a, it's more of a lesson on, on how, how to, how to navigate to find, to find
the answers.
Right.
Like, and even that, that kind of, that kind of insight and training.
Yeah.
My great grandfather used to have a line that he'd say to just, you know, I don't know by next
week we'll both know.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's a good line.
I like it.
(15:23):
That's a good one.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So Jason, if I, if I pick up your book coming to come this Tuesday, I pick up your book.
What's the structure?
What's the layout?
What can I expect?
If I opened that first page, how, what am I getting into?
So it's 101 kind of blog length, blog post length treatments of different specific skills,
different specific ideas separated into 10 chapters.
(15:45):
The first one's golden rules.
And these are things that apply across multiple situations or they're applied to just kind of
one topic.
but they're so important that I thought they needed training treatment right at the
top.
Um, in many cases, they're busting some kind of child safety myth that's been held for
a long time.
Or that even though we know better, a lot of people have pushed back.
(16:06):
And then from there, but there's nine other sections.
So there's, there's one on fire prevention and accidents and first aid, and there's one
on driving safety and there's one on school safety.
And there's one on internet safety, one on dating and sex, one on communication, one on
family vacation training, one on crime prevention.
And each of the, each of those sections has 10 tips or tricks that you can read and then
(16:29):
go implement.
Like a couple of examples in the, in the golden rules, there's, uh,
debunking the stranger danger myth.
Right.
I mean, a lot of people still teach stranger danger, even though strangers don't hurt kids
nearly as much as people they know.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And the people, the people who know, understand that you don't teach your kid, don't talk to
(16:54):
strangers.
You teach your kids what strangers to approach if they lose track of you.
Yeah.
Because a kid who's with people they know, they don't need help.
They're getting help.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so you teach them, you know, for youngest kids, especially if you can't find your family,
go find another family because an adult with kids is statistically the safest adult for a
(17:19):
child to approach.
You know, they're not likely to hurt a kid, at least not their own kids, unfortunately.
And you guys have kids.
If a kid lost their people and came to you for help, you would stop at nothing short of
endangering your own kids to reunite that family.
That would be called today's project.
Yep.
Yep.
That's right.
You know, so things like that, um, all the way down to very specific things like for
car safety.
(17:39):
And this is a, this is what I got from a bodyguard named Nick Hughes.
Uh, next time you buy a pair of sneakers, you take the old pair of sneakers and you put them
in the trunk of the car and you do that for every family member.
That way, if you have a breakdown on date night, your wife's not walking to the gas
station in her stilettos.
And it's a really easy, simple thing to do.
(18:03):
Next pair, you'd go in, you replace the one with the car shoes with the old shoes.
And then the car shoes go into the trash or to goodwill, depending on how badly you abuse
them.
No.
So it's, it's things of advice like that from the kind of conceptual, but still very specific
with ways to act on it down to really, really simple little changes you can make in
(18:23):
how you move through the world that just make your family safer in ways that I hadn't
thought of before I started talking to these folks.
Do you, uh, so, so here's what I'm interested in on your family side.
Uh, have your kids become, uh, the, uh, how, how do they handle being the recipients of, of
a, of a dad who's, who's just become an encyclopedia of these, uh, like kind of best practices,
(18:49):
tips and tricks.
Uh, I I'm just wondering, uh, and, and again,
remind me your, you got your kid's age is important in this, but I'm, I'm wondering
how they interact, uh, interact with all of this and, uh, how you've learned to communicate
these things to them.
Well, that's a good question.
The oldest was 20 when the project started, you know, and they both always had a karate
dad, you know, so I've always been kind of in this already.
(19:11):
And the oldest is 20, didn't have kids of his own.
And, but he was, you know, he was responding to some of them with, oh, that's nice, but dad,
I don't have kids.
Um, but some of the others were, oh, all right.
I'm like, he's got spare shoes in the back of his car.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like that kind of thing.
Yeah.
You know, when I, when I blew up and spent my first COVID, uh, COVID unemployment check
(19:33):
building, really extensive first aid kits for every vehicle in the household, I was very
happy to do that.
And then when I hurt my leg three months later, he had Coban wrap and a trauma pad on it from
his kid before I was done using the F word.
You know, I was 10 when I started, so he still thought I was a superhero.
He's 15 now.
(19:54):
So he's starting to get, he's starting to roll his eyes a little bit, but you know, on the
times when it's, and this is an important thing I mentioned in the book several times
about involving our kids in our planning and our plans, but you know, he knows his roles
in emergencies and practices them willingly with me.
Um, you know, I think I got another six months before I'm just the stupidest person he's
(20:16):
ever met, but we'll see.
Well, it's, I always like to, I, this is attributed to Mark Twain, but he, you know, he's got this
quote where he, I, I think, I don't think it's apocryphal.
I think some, I, this is a summary, but you know, he says when, when I was growing up in
the house, um, I thought my parents were the dumbest people on the face of the earth.
And then I went off to college and when I returned, I was amazed at how much they had
(20:40):
learned and, uh, you know, so the hope, the hope is always that, yeah, the light bulb turns
on a little bit and I'm in perspective shifts a little bit and they see obviously out in
the real world that, uh, some of these, these principles and these guides are, are helpful
and they actually, you know, they actually touch on, on real life.
Um, what you've mentioned a few here, just, just recently, practical things.
(21:02):
Have there been other things that you've kind of had the aha with that you've implemented
in the midst of this project?
And you've just said to yourself, man, I'm glad I, I did that.
Or man, I'm glad that someone told me about that so that I could be prepared for it.
Is it anything that kind of comes to your mind there?
But there's all kinds of little things.
Um, and some of them aren't like, whew, I'm glad I did that.
(21:25):
That's, it was would have gotten really bad if I hadn't.
But, um, for example, I was telling Andrew before the show started that we spent last year in
Crete and, uh, some of the travel advice there that I got for that chapter shows up little
things.
Like if you're in a developed nation, you want a hotel room between the second and the seventh
(21:46):
floor because first floor is an invitation to break in anything above seven.
You can't be sure that the ladder trucks will reach your room.
Sure.
Okay.
Yeah.
And that goes down to four.
If you're in a developing nation.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Um, little things like that or advice about, you know, when you're traveling, uh, keep,
(22:08):
keep enough money to buy a trinket or pay for your meal in the front pocket and then keep
the other cash in other pockets.
But whenever you have to count or exchange money, go to the bathroom, sit down in the
stall and do it there.
Mm-hmm.
That's good.
That's good advice.
Is there something that you, you found that kind of just really surprised you, uh, when
(22:29):
you look back at the lessons that you've learned over these 101 safety tips, is there one that
surprised you that you were, you didn't really expect it kind of came out of nowhere?
Oh yeah.
So, you know, that, that code word that we all got taught when we were kids, we've maybe
taught our kids where if we can't come get you at school or we can't come get you at soccer
practice, or we can't come get you at your parkour lessons.
(22:52):
Uh, here's a code word that somebody you don't know will know to tell you if I have to send
like, you know, my, my office mate secretary to come get you.
Right.
We we've heard this, we might be applying it.
Yeah.
Terrible idea.
We shouldn't do it.
Um, the reason being, um, number one, they've tested it and the kids who are the age to need
(23:14):
that can't remember it under pressure.
And number two, it's a secret.
How close does a child stand to somebody to somebody when they're telling secrets
with an arms?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Close.
Yep.
Yep.
So the kid leans in to tell the secret and then they're.
(23:36):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Grab.
You know, I want to again, reiterate that strangers kidnapping kids is very, very, very,
very, very, very, very rare.
Uh, but this thing that was designed to prevent that actually makes it easier to do.
So the advice is actually, so imagine a situation where you or your spouse or the two or three
(23:56):
other people who pick them up on the regular can't do it.
They can't make it.
Uh, what would happen if you just called them and said, you're going to be late and to watch
your kid until you can show up.
You trust those people with your kids because they're there already.
Most of them like you and your kids and they're professionals.
And this isn't the first time it's happened to them.
(24:19):
And in the real big blow up emergencies, like a school, your school, your church, your karate
school, whatever the facility is probably safer, more comfortable than your house anyway.
Hmm.
So.
For me.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That makes a lot.
That makes a lot of sense.
Yeah.
(24:39):
Yeah.
Um, what are, uh, as you think about this book, I, you know, uh, it's a, it's a labor of love.
You're, you're sort of birthing this thing out into the, into the world.
Um, what, what is your hope for it?
What, what, when you think about, uh, those that are potentially, uh, getting this and implementing
(25:00):
it, um, what do you really hope kind of in your, in your heart of hearts that, um, you
know, comes out of people interacting with it?
I've got kind of a personal goal and a professional goal.
Personal goal is real simple.
I wanted to save somebody's life.
I want a kid to survive into adulthood and have kids and grandkids of their own and make
a difference in the world because their parents read a chapter in this book at some point.
(25:25):
Um, you know, I don't want any family to go through the experience that it would require
for that to happen because I'm not a, I'm not a monster, but yeah, that's, that's what
I want for the book.
That's why I'm putting it out in the world.
And I hope that happens.
Yeah.
Um, on a professional level, there's a book called the gift of fear by Gavin DeBecker,
(25:48):
which is like the go-to personal safety book and has been since the mid nineties.
And that guy wrote a book called protecting the gift, which has been the go-to parental
safety book.
You go, you know, you call 20 martial arts school today and do it that five times.
You've called a hundred martial arts schools and ask him, Hey, what book should I buy?
I just became a parent.
Uh, 90 of them will recommend protecting the gift.
(26:08):
And I want to just, I would outsell it.
I want to replace its, its spot in the, in the ecosystem.
I want it to be the new protecting the gift.
Awesome.
Awesome.
So what, what sparked you on to this whole project?
Not just the, not just the book itself, but, you know, think way back into the blog and
the podcast that you, that you started, like what actually started that for you to go, Hey,
(26:33):
you know, cause you said yourself, you know, I was, I was doing a bunch of different things
before I did this and I changed it and did this.
So what sparred that on to go, Hey, I want to start this safety thing.
So the very first seed goes back to 2008.
And that was the year I adopted my oldest son.
And at that time I was running a martial arts school.
(26:54):
I had, I think I had four degrees of black belt.
I had bodyguard assignments.
I had worked as a bouncer.
I had done very stupid things in very stupid places and came back still alive.
Um, you know, I kind of thought I was a badass and, um, this adoption was, it was a in family
extended family adoption where dad wasn't in the picture and mom became medically incapable
(27:17):
of caring for him further.
And so it was, it wasn't, you know, try with your wife for nine for a year and a half and
then have nine months of warning.
And it wasn't folks who have adopted.
No, it is often a very long process.
It was, Oh shit.
I've got a kid.
Um, and I remember the weekend before we transferred him over before he came to live with us, I was
(27:44):
practicing some weapon disarms with some people at the seminar.
And then we're doing some gun disarms and every single one of them, you kind of, the
guns pointed out, you get to turn, you capture the gun and you pull past you down at about
hip level, which keeps me from getting shot.
But if there's a seven year old, he was seven at the time standing directly behind me, which
is where I'd probably want him to be standing.
(28:06):
If there was trouble, it points the gun directly at him.
I was like, hold on.
Wait just one damn minute here.
And I realized and kind of thought about it, realized how little of the training I'd had
and the experiences that had had anything to do with protecting a child.
And then I kind of broadened that to, and that's just my crime prevention, self-defense
(28:30):
stuff.
I was even dumber about fire prevention.
I had a first aid certification from back when I was a camp counselor when I was 19.
You know, when I went to re up my first aid stuff, they'd added AED since the last time
I'd gotten the card.
Yeah.
And just from there, I realized how ignorant I was.
And then because I've had very good coaches, my immediate response to being ignorant is go
(28:54):
find people who aren't and just ring them drive information.
And that's kind of how the project started.
And, uh, and, uh, the podcast and the book idea and all that was my COVID seizure.
Gotcha.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The, uh, I think about Andy, like our show began just before, just before COVID.
And I, I think to myself, like, uh, how lucky we were to start it beforehand.
(29:20):
Cause I'm, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not sure we would have, uh, yeah, I'm not sure we would
have, uh, reacted the same way, reacted the same way.
But yeah, I think, you know, Jason, it's really, I think it's just a really, really cool thing
that, uh, there's people out there in the world like you that are kind of taking me all
these things in and helping give some practical advice without being an alarmist.
(29:44):
I mean, like you said, I mean, some of these scenarios, they are, they may or may not ever
happen to us.
We may or may not find ourselves in those situations, but we hope we never, we hope
we never do.
But, um, you know, in a world where prevention is, uh, well, whatever the saying is, what an
(30:05):
ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
You know, um, these things are, these things are helpful to be, to not just, I mean, just
not be generally ignorant about, you know, and to, and to realize that, cause I think so
many of the things that you're talking about are pretty simple preventative things that the
vast majority of us can, uh, can approach if we just give some brain power to it and, uh,
(30:29):
you know, and, and, and think about it for a second.
Um, and, and maybe even uncover some, uh, you know, some liabilities that we have, uh,
you know, in, in areas that are also, uh, you know, more readily, uh, approachable and,
um, you know, the, uh, I, I was talking with, oh gosh, mental, this came from a mental health
(30:55):
professional that I was engaging with and really had the conversation about, you know, the people
that are frequently the most traumatized by things are the naive, um, is it's naivety that
is, you know, that, oh, that probably won't happen or those things can't happen or, or,
or whatever that when it does catches them so off guard that they are, they're the most damaged
(31:21):
by it, you know, physically, mentally, emotionally, all of that.
So there's that, there's the, you know, this can't be happening.
There's the what's happening and there's the, how dare this happen?
All three of which just slow down the time between the bad things happening and you developing
(31:42):
an appropriate plan.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So thinking about it ahead of time, having a plan ahead of time, it's also really just an
investment in your own, in your own wellbeing of, if I hear what you're saying correctly,
you know, of just, uh, shortening our reaction time and also giving clarity to our reaction
(32:04):
and what we're going to do.
And that little bit of, uh, that little bit of insight, just, uh, it's of, of, of great
help.
Obviously there's a ton of variables out in the world, the things that we have zero control
over, but the things that we do have control over, we should take seriously.
And, uh, that's a, that's a really, really great reminder.
So, yeah.
And as you say, this, the stuff we can do is fairly simple.
(32:26):
It's scary, but it's not hard.
You know, things, things like stocking your first aid kit.
So that when you're, so when your idiot brother who's living in the house puts a broken mug in
the trash bag and your idiot self drags that to the curb and gives themselves a spear wound
in the calf, you have Coban wrap and a trauma pad ready to hand.
(32:51):
I'll tell you, Jason's example there was strikingly lifelike and, uh, seemingly, uh, parallel, parallel to reality.
Um, purely hypothetical, purely hypothetical.
It sounded totally.
I'm not that dumb.
Yeah.
But we do get caught out.
Um, uh, we got, we got a new car relatively recently and I was driving from Portland to
(33:15):
Denver to do a seminar and I had a blowout on the side of the road in Idaho.
So I pull over and, you know, it's a two lane highway in Idaho with trucks, blast and pass at
85 and about, and a shoulder that's maybe a six inches wider than my car.
And that's when I realized I have no idea.
How to find the donut and the equipment in this car that I just bought a month ago.
(33:40):
So I'm on the side of the road on YouTube.
Okay.
Best case scenario.
Yeah.
You know, you catch yourself out.
Yeah.
And it's just, and having those, that systematic approach, the small things, the tips, the
list and all of that to keep you and your family safe.
You know, my kids, my youngest is 15.
He's got his permit before he's allowed to have his license.
(34:01):
He's going to change the tire on the truck at least twice.
Yep.
Yep.
Yep.
Yep.
Those, those skills that we often, uh, we often forget about, but, uh, I know that was
the requirement and that was a requirement for me.
And, uh, you know, it's a simple things like that.
So all great stuff.
That's a really, really great.
Again, Jason, you can put that, uh, you can put that book back up right, right, right front
(34:25):
and center here again.
Uh, obviously safest family on the block.
101 tips, tricks, hacks, and habits to protect your family by esteemed author, Jason Brick.
Fantastic.
Yeah.
We're going to, well, we'll obviously make sure that we have that all over at dudes and dads
dot com and the show notes, uh, links to the book, uh, for all of you to hop on it.
(34:48):
What a great, you know what I'll say?
You know, I'll say Indy both mother's day and then father's day coming up.
Great gifts.
Great gifts.
Yeah.
Great practical gifts for, uh, the people that, that love us the most, our moms and dads to
have that as a little bit of a, of a manual, if you will.
Yes.
Ready to go.
(35:08):
Absolutely.
Well, thanks Jason for joining us, but Hey, before we go, we can't let you get by.
Thank you.
Without having the pop quiz.
So if you've never joined us, the pop quiz at a time that we just like to pepper Jason
with questions for things that may or may not have to do with safety, but things that we
think we just want to get to know him a little bit better.
(35:30):
There we go.
So there we go outside of the safety realm.
Yeah.
Most likely.
So Joel, do you want to ask it first?
I do.
I'm going to take actually, and I'm going to take a question out of your playbook, uh, because
I think it's appropriate for Jason, Jason currently, what is your favorite gadget?
My favorite gadget.
Okay.
So I'm going to, I'm going to go back in the martial arts stuff.
(35:51):
Just took a class on using a carabiner as a self-defense weapon.
And it was brutal.
It's not like, um, you don't use it just like brass knuckles, but you slide it down to here
to Paul.
Oh, and just a slap upside the head is now dental work.
Interesting.
Oh man.
And let alone doing like joint locks and stuff, you know?
(36:13):
Yeah.
You do a joint lock.
It hurts.
You do a joint lock with a carabiner grinding against your bones.
It's absolute misery.
Wow.
It was so cool for friends.
I've friends.
I've got to say the carabiner around this myth that I've gotten, we've got to, we might
have to find a larger size, but, uh, I don't know if they make it, but I'm, I'm going to
now I'm, I'm curious.
We're going to, can I find a carabiner that will fit around my hand done?
(36:36):
Yes, you can.
Okay.
Okay.
I did a lot of rock climbing in college and I can, they're out there.
Okay.
Wonderful.
Awesome.
Jason, what is something that you want
to be... No, sorry. What is one thing that...
Something... Sorry.
I can't read my own card today.
What is something that you like that most people
don't like?
Oh, the movie Hudson
(36:57):
Hawk. I don't know
that I've seen that. It's an old
Bruce Willis movie where he's a cat burglary.
He does it with Danny Aiello. Hudson Hawk,
yes. Weird movie
where the cat burglars
for precision timing, because remember,
Bruce Willis had a brief
recording career there.
So he and Danny Aiello,
(37:18):
to get their pinpoint timing in their capers,
they choose a song and sing it.
And it turns into this weird...
Yeah, it's... Everybody
panned it. Everybody hates it. People make fun of me.
But I love that movie. It makes me belly laugh
every single time.
Alright. Well, there you go. Now everybody
knows. That's fantastic.
Jason, real personal question.
(37:38):
Are you a fan of Soup?
Soup? Yes.
Although I like stews better.
Okay. Tell me your favorite, and then we'll go with that.
Tell me about your favorite stew.
Mulligatani.
What in the world?
Yeah, tell me about that.
You've been interested in something new.
What's going on?
Mulligatani is what happened
(37:59):
when Irish troops stationed
in India missed stew.
Because stew's not really a traditionally Irish dish.
So it is a
chicken stew
with lentils and curry.
Oh, okay.
And when I make it, I blend the lentils.
So it's this creamy,
curry-tasting
chicken stew
with celery
(38:19):
and onions.
And it's
amazeballs.
Andy, I feel like this might be
the first
exciting culinary dish
that's been introduced to us
during
a pop quiz.
Now, I know that
we were introduced to,
if you remember,
Dudes and Dad's alumni,
Sebastiano Rosso,
(38:39):
once told us about
Zuppa de Mare,
which is his
favorite
Sicilian
dish.
But
now we've gotten
culinary insight
even into the making
of one.
And we're going to look this up.
We're going to Google it.
We're going to find out.
We should make it on the podcast.
There we go.
That's it.
Dudes and Dad's
Dudes and Dad's
(38:59):
Our Soup Edition.
Great.
Jason, tell me.
I'll send you the recipe.
It's done.
All right.
Perfect.
Let's do it.
Which living person
do you most admire?
Oh,
I wish you'd asked me that
three months ago
because it would have been
my grandmother.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, grandma.
Oh, yeah.
So there's a fellow
(39:20):
named Dave McNeil
who runs the Goju Shore
who ran the Goju Shore
weapon system
until he retired
a couple years ago.
And he's just
a deeply kind,
deeply weird,
deeply funny guy.
And, you know,
whenever I, you know,
I respect my father
very much as well.
But, you know,
when I come to a crossroads,
it's often what would David do?
(39:41):
Wonderful.
Wonderful.
Joel, do you have a last question?
My last question to Jason
is,
Jason, if
there were,
oh, we're going to steal
another one from you
because I like this.
Because we're going to say
on the food thing real quick.
Jason, if there was a
sandwich named after you,
what would it,
what would it be?
What would,
what would be on it?
(40:01):
What would be on it?
Is that what it is?
Yeah.
Yeah.
If you like go to the deli,
you're like,
hey, I'll have a,
have an order of the Jason Brick.
What,
what is that sandwich exactly?
so it's going to have a,
so it's going to have a hatched green chili.
It's from New Mexico.
And if you do that,
then it's going to need
probably turkey or chicken
and then a white cheese
like provolone
(40:22):
or maybe mozzarella.
Okay.
Maybe Gruyere,
but maybe that might not,
that might not work too well.
Throw some,
throw some lettuce
and a couple of tomatoes,
a little salt and pepper
on top of that,
a little bit of mayo.
And then you dip it
in your Malkatonic.
It's a callback.
That's a callback.
Within.
Yeah.
(40:42):
Love it.
All sorts of new things
in the podcast today.
Jason,
you've just unlocked
some new worlds for us.
Thank you so much.
Awesome.
Awesome.
Awesome.
Well,
Hey everybody,
Jason,
thanks for being with us.
We will be,
as we said in the show notes,
we'll get the,
the book out,
make sure people can find it
and on the socials.
Thanks for joining us.
Appreciate it so much,
my friend,
all the way from the West coast.
Andy.
(41:03):
Hey,
it's been real.
It's been fun.
Remind people where they can call us.
We want to,
let's get another voicemail in.
Okay.
Can we do it?
We would love to have another voicemail.
Five,
seven,
four,
five,
zero,
one,
four,
four,
six,
seven,
again,
five,
seven,
four,
five,
zero,
one,
four,
four,
six,
seven,
or reach out to us on the Gmails
at dudes and dads podcast at gmail.com.
(41:25):
You can leave us all kinds of ideas,
reviews,
all that.
Hey,
like,
subscribe,
follow,
high five,
tell your friends,
tell your friends about the dudes and dads podcast.
Caring is sharing and sharing is caring as we say sometimes.
And go get the book for your mom and dad or people in the life that you care for.
Yeah,
yeah,
yeah,
exactly.
(41:45):
If you don't get them,
this book,
do you actually care about them?
That's what you should be asking.
Hey,
everybody,
we,
we,
we thank you so much for hanging out with us for another episode.
And until next time,
we wish you grace and peace.
you
you
you
you
you
Okay.
you
you
you
you
Just a quick message before we get into this episode.
While all of our shows are normally kid-friendly, family-friendly, and we love kids and love that they listen to our show,
the guest in this episode used a few words that may not be appropriate for all ages of ears.
So just a word of warning, you may want to listen first before listening in the car with your little kiddos.
(00:21):
On this episode of the Dudes and Dads podcast, we talk with our friend Jason Brick about safety.
Joel!
Andrew.
How are you doing today?
Well, I think you said it earlier, but it's been a long day.
It has, man.
(00:42):
This time of year especially is just, I don't know, it just seems tough with all of the stuff going on.
I have amnesia about this season every year that we enter into it and we're like, oh right, a lot of things going on.
And, you know, the weather right now is sunny one day and very not the other.
(01:02):
So we're figuring it out.
We'll get through it.
Eventually it'll be morning.
May is here.
Maybe that means new things.
Hey everybody, welcome to the Dudes and Dads podcast.
Glad to have each and every one of you along for the ride.
Glad to have our conversation that we're going to have.
(01:23):
And Andy, I'm particularly glad to be across the table from you.
It seems like it's been a while, but it's only last week of recorded last episode.
So we're, we're, uh, we're in rapid succession here.
We are.
Yeah.
But, uh, so Joel, we had a conversation last week about college grads and their jobs and all of that good stuff.
(01:43):
Yes.
Why, why young people are struggling to maintain their employment out of college and why certain business leaders are saying, I cannot hire these people.
I won't hire these people.
And, uh, and just, it was a little bit of a generational black ball as I, as I think I put it.
(02:05):
So we did get feedback, voicemail feedback, and we appreciate that.
So Steven has let us called in.
Are you talking about the Steven Berkey?
I am.
And so let's listen to that.
Hey, Andy and Joel, this is Steven.
Um, just listened to your latest episode about the 20 somethings, uh, struggling in the job world and, uh, appreciate it.
(02:30):
It was really interesting conversation.
Uh, I thought I'd leave a little bit of feedback, um, regarding that, not directly regarding that, but in my job as I work at a, as a lender at a bank, um, I've had multiple times.
Where I've had, uh, mid to late 20 somethings that need a loan for a car or house that instead of them calling me up and asking the questions, setting up the appointments, it's been mom or dad, uh, doing that.
(02:58):
As a parent of a teenager, I'm not there yet, but I always think on those situations, you know, I think we're kind of doing a disservice if that's the case.
Um, at that point, uh, certainly mom and dad, I think can be great, uh, guide given advice.
Um, but at some point you gotta kind of let them, uh, run on their own.
(03:18):
Um, and if you're going to hold their hand through it, I think we're, we're maybe doing a bit of a disservice.
Um, so anyway, just wanted to throw that two cents in there.
Um, you know, maybe a challenge as a parent, you know, certainly want to equip them, but at some point they got to stand on their own two feet.
So thanks guys.
Appreciate the show.
Thanks.
Steven Berkey coming through big time on the voicemail.
(03:39):
Yes.
That's wow.
I, Andy, I had not even considered that.
I had not even considered that dynamic.
And wow.
From, uh, from somebody who's, who's in the banking world working through the lending.
I mean, I can't even imagine Andy.
I don't even know when I having my parents at that age call in right for me.
(03:59):
Right.
And I understand helping out a little bit for them to call in, but if you have voicemail,
we would love to talk to you, uh, hear your voicemail.
Five, seven, four, five, oh, one, four, four, six, seven is our voicemail number.
Five, seven, four, five, zero, one, four, four, six, seven.
Join, join the crowd.
Get on board with, with Steven Berkey.
(04:22):
Leave the voicemail.
That was Steven.
I just have to say that was fantastic.
Love the, love the feedback.
I hope it inspires more because we, we just love, we love to hear the thoughts.
That's great.
Awesome.
So thank you, Steven, for calling that in.
And tonight we are talking with a returning guest, Jason Brick, Jason, welcome.
Dudes and Dads podcast alumni, Jason, congratulations.
(04:45):
You're amongst the few of the proud and the repeat offenders.
Thank you so much for having a, uh, taking the time to be with us.
We appreciate it.
Outstanding.
Thank you very much.
It's always good to be a recidivist.
Yeah.
He's he, he escaped the program and has found him his way, his way back in further, for further
treatment.
Yeah.
So, so for, for, for, for reference, we had you back on season four, episode 18, where we
(05:12):
were talking about keeping our families safe.
And that was all the way back in 2002.
Holy smoke.
And so you have changed, you have changed back then.
You had no hair on the top of your head and you have a full, full lock of hair right now.
So, and Jason, I have to say, I was, uh, pleasantly, I don't know if it was a pleasantly
alarmed by the, the flowing locks.
It's really, uh, it's striking a little bit of gray in there perhaps too.
(05:36):
So, uh, watch out.
Oh goodness.
It's, uh, it's a good one.
It happened when, uh, we watched John wick and I asked my wife, Hey, you know, cause
I'm midlife crisis age.
Yeah.
Do you think I could pull off, pull that off?
The, the John wick hair.
Yeah.
And she got a little cash in her throat and said, Oh, better try.
(05:57):
Oh, here we are.
Well, here we are.
Oh, nicely done.
So, so lots has happened since 2002.
Uh, do you mean 22?
Yes.
And 2002, all the things.
Yes.
So much has happened since 2022 though.
Yes.
But you've written a book.
Tell me a little bit about the book.
(06:17):
Sure thing.
So when I come on last time, I had just started my podcast, safest family on the block, where
I found as many experts from as many different fields as I possibly could to tell me about
keeping my family safe.
And that would be a EMS captain one week, a police officer, the next, but you know, where
a lot of people think about safety, but I'd also get on a suicide counselor and a nutritionist
(06:42):
and a driving instructor.
Yes.
Anybody from any area.
And then I got together the 101 most important things that I learned from them all.
Oh, nice.
Nice.
And wrote it into this here book, which comes out on Tuesday.
See, I learned how to keep my family safe, not how to properly.
Lighting is everything, but yes.
(07:05):
There you go.
You're right.
That's perfect.
You're right.
Yeah.
And that comes out Tuesday, uh, this coming Tuesday, which I want to say is the fifth or
the sixth, six, six through a YMAA publishing.
Nice.
Great.
Nice.
Yeah.
So, you know, uh, we always, anytime anybody's authored it, we've had an author on here with
(07:26):
the book.
We, I always like to ask the question, like, what was your process in putting this together?
Was it, you just went through every expert and you just condensed what they had said, or
was there kind of a, uh, Oh, like an internal organizing principle or how you assembled your
content?
Well, for this one, the, um, the book was always in mind from the very first interview
(07:47):
and I envisioned it as a 101 tips structure, which is what it ended up keeping, which is
really rare when you start a book that it actually resembles the original brief, original brief.
Um, but in this case I just kept an Excel file open and for every interview I take the one
or two most important points.
And one of the things I wanted to do was keep taking off the conceptual things, but, uh, the
(08:11):
stuff that's actually a thing you can do.
And so I try to mine one or two out of every episode, every, every interview.
And then when I had a hundred good ones, I started writing the book.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I, uh, I, uh, as he's saying this, uh, Andy, I think to myself, uh, we should have done that.
(08:32):
Yeah.
We're like seven seasons.
Yeah.
It's like, you know, gosh, we should go back through and look at all the things that people
have told us that might be of some use to people.
If we just put it all together.
Yeah.
That's a, that's, that's pretty wild.
What, um, you know, as this book and we obviously in our previous interview, which, you know,
(08:53):
gosh, every time we have a returning guest, Andy, I just think to myself, time just flies.
Like I would not have, if you would have asked me how, how long ago we had the first interview,
I would have been like, Oh, not that long ago.
Well, I got the email from Jason a little while ago and I kind of, I like, we were so super
busy at the time and I didn't, I didn't respond to it, but I was like, when I saw it, I was
like, man, that's a throwback.
(09:15):
When did we actually have him on?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Three years ago.
Three years ago.
Um, and so Jason in this time, I mean, since we last talked till now, you know, as you think
about, uh, the, the kind of the commitments and the time that you've given to really having
this kind of safest family on the block conversation, what, what has developed in your mind?
(09:37):
Have there been, have there been some new insights that you've gained, maybe previous
understandings that you've had that you've, you've shifted on what has been the learning
experience, uh, for you, uh, in this process as you've interviewed all these people again.
And I think the amazing part is all these folks that have real life on the ground experience,
I'm sure that have, cause you've gotten a book out of it, like have real practical ideas,
(10:00):
but as you've interacted with, with the various, your various guests and have had these conversations,
what's sort of been your thought journey kind of from beginning to where you are now?
So one of the big ones is I found out that the baddest asses on the planet are some of the
nicest, most giving humans.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
You know, you got in talking to special forces operators, veteran cops, martial arts masters,
(10:24):
talk to a spy, a former CIA agent, and they were all so friendly and kind and giving it's
to the point where if I meet somebody who says they're a tough guy and they're mean, I doubt
the tough guy credentials.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Um, yeah.
One of the big changes that impacted my parenting and, you know, I come to this from my first
(10:48):
career was in martial arts, security consulting, doing some body, God works and bouncing and then
into journalism.
But so a lot of this stuff was a little familiar to me or required tweaking, but one place that
really changed was, I mean, after I talked to a lot of mental health experts, communications
experts, uh, that idea that a lot of us, cause we're about the same age.
(11:10):
We, you know, we grew up in families where if we got in trouble at school, we were going
to get in more trouble at home.
A hundred percent.
Yes, absolutely.
That our parents felt it was their responsibility to make our bad day worse.
And I, you know, my two kids, they're 10 years apart and I raised the first one under
that model.
(11:31):
And then I've learned better from talking to experts about being that trusted resource
for your kids.
That if your kid gets into a fight at school or finds out they're getting an F, they don't
come home going, Oh God, just dreading telling us or just really sweating bullets.
Cause they know the teacher made the call, but they come home knowing that, Hey, we're going
(11:53):
to have a sit down.
I'm going to get a hug and we're going to figure it out together.
And I'm not saying to, you know, shield them from the consequences, but we need to
first not add additional arbitrary con consequences at home.
The world's going to treat them mean enough and then walk with them to handle the meaningful
(12:16):
natural consequences with discipline and grace and maturity.
Yeah.
And that's, that's not how I was raised by my parents.
That's not how y'all were raised by your parents.
I don't think a lot of parents of people, our age raises that way.
And it's not because they were bad people.
It's because they hadn't learned.
That wasn't the way you raise good kids back then.
Yeah.
But I found through a lot of these interviews that now we know better and now I'm doing
(12:40):
better to the point that I apologized to my oldest kid.
And we actually, between us, we call him the rough draft.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, the eldest child is a little bit of a Guinea pig, a little bit of a Guinea pig.
We like to think we get better as we go along.
Which is funny because my youngest is always like, it's not fair.
You don't know what it's like to be the youngest.
I'm like, you have no idea what it's like to be the oldest.
Let me tell you.
(13:01):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That rough, that rough draft face is a doozy, my friend.
Yeah.
And it's, you know, it's not just, um, you know, touchy feely woo woo stuff either,
but it's also safety, safety related because if your kid learns in first grade that if he
gets in a fight on the playground and you're going to be a resource instead of a threat,
that means in eighth grade, ninth grade, when she's first thing, first gets offered drugs,
(13:29):
she's going to come talk to about that.
And in sixth, sixth grade, you know, or not sixth grade, 16th grade, you know, sophomore,
sophomore, junior year, when she's serious about her first boyfriend and is thinking about
physical steps, she's going to listen to your advice, whether or not she directly seeks it.
And it also means when she's 27 and she's married to that guy who hit her once.
(13:52):
Yeah.
She's not going to try to keep that a secret from you.
Yeah.
She's going to come to you and ask what to do.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Being a, I think that that topic has actually come up on this show a lot in one way or the
other, being a safe place for our kids, being a trusted resource for them.
And, uh, in the wild world of parenting these days where it feels like, uh, it, it is a really,
(14:14):
and you know, it's a really intentional endeavor to stay ahead of the, you know, stay, have the
ball and be aware of the world in which our, our kids are facing.
Something that is different than the world in which we grew up as you've, as you've absolutely
pointed out, even in terms of mindsets and of, you know, parenting approaches.
Um, the, uh, I think it can be easy to get a little bit overwhelmed in knowing all the right
(14:40):
moves to make, but, but the one overlapping, I think right, right move we can make is to be
available is to be available is to be a trusted is to be a trusted place for our kids.
Um, and maybe, and I mean, and not even necessarily the, the place for all the right answers,
you know, either.
Um, right.
I think it's important for our kids to know that we don't have all of the right answers,
(15:03):
but we're here and we'll explore these things together.
Yeah.
It's more of a, it's more of a lesson on, on how, how to, how to navigate to find, to find
the answers.
Right.
Like, and even that, that kind of, that kind of insight and training.
Yeah.
My great grandfather used to have a line that he'd say to just, you know, I don't know by next
week we'll both know.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's a good line.
I like it.
(15:23):
That's a good one.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So Jason, if I, if I pick up your book coming to come this Tuesday, I pick up your book.
What's the structure?
What's the layout?
What can I expect?
If I opened that first page, how, what am I getting into?
So it's 101 kind of blog length, blog post length treatments of different specific skills,
different specific ideas separated into 10 chapters.
(15:45):
The first one's golden rules.
And these are things that apply across multiple situations or they're applied to just kind of
one topic.
but they're so important that I thought they needed training treatment right at the
top.
Um, in many cases, they're busting some kind of child safety myth that's been held for
a long time.
Or that even though we know better, a lot of people have pushed back.
(16:06):
And then from there, but there's nine other sections.
So there's, there's one on fire prevention and accidents and first aid, and there's one
on driving safety and there's one on school safety.
And there's one on internet safety, one on dating and sex, one on communication, one on
family vacation training, one on crime prevention.
And each of the, each of those sections has 10 tips or tricks that you can read and then
(16:29):
go implement.
Like a couple of examples in the, in the golden rules, there's, uh,
debunking the stranger danger myth.
Right.
I mean, a lot of people still teach stranger danger, even though strangers don't hurt kids
nearly as much as people they know.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And the people, the people who know, understand that you don't teach your kid, don't talk to
(16:54):
strangers.
You teach your kids what strangers to approach if they lose track of you.
Yeah.
Because a kid who's with people they know, they don't need help.
They're getting help.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so you teach them, you know, for youngest kids, especially if you can't find your family,
go find another family because an adult with kids is statistically the safest adult for a
(17:19):
child to approach.
You know, they're not likely to hurt a kid, at least not their own kids, unfortunately.
And you guys have kids.
If a kid lost their people and came to you for help, you would stop at nothing short of
endangering your own kids to reunite that family.
That would be called today's project.
Yep.
Yep.
That's right.
You know, so things like that, um, all the way down to very specific things like for
car safety.
(17:39):
And this is a, this is what I got from a bodyguard named Nick Hughes.
Uh, next time you buy a pair of sneakers, you take the old pair of sneakers and you put them
in the trunk of the car and you do that for every family member.
That way, if you have a breakdown on date night, your wife's not walking to the gas
station in her stilettos.
And it's a really easy, simple thing to do.
(18:03):
Next pair, you'd go in, you replace the one with the car shoes with the old shoes.
And then the car shoes go into the trash or to goodwill, depending on how badly you abuse
them.
No.
So it's, it's things of advice like that from the kind of conceptual, but still very specific
with ways to act on it down to really, really simple little changes you can make in
(18:23):
how you move through the world that just make your family safer in ways that I hadn't
thought of before I started talking to these folks.
Do you, uh, so, so here's what I'm interested in on your family side.
Uh, have your kids become, uh, the, uh, how, how do they handle being the recipients of, of
a, of a dad who's, who's just become an encyclopedia of these, uh, like kind of best practices,
(18:49):
tips and tricks.
Uh, I I'm just wondering, uh, and, and again,
remind me your, you got your kid's age is important in this, but I'm, I'm wondering
how they interact, uh, interact with all of this and, uh, how you've learned to communicate
these things to them.
Well, that's a good question.
The oldest was 20 when the project started, you know, and they both always had a karate
dad, you know, so I've always been kind of in this already.
(19:11):
And the oldest is 20, didn't have kids of his own.
And, but he was, you know, he was responding to some of them with, oh, that's nice, but dad,
I don't have kids.
Um, but some of the others were, oh, all right.
I'm like, he's got spare shoes in the back of his car.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like that kind of thing.
Yeah.
You know, when I, when I blew up and spent my first COVID, uh, COVID unemployment check
(19:33):
building, really extensive first aid kits for every vehicle in the household, I was very
happy to do that.
And then when I hurt my leg three months later, he had Coban wrap and a trauma pad on it from
his kid before I was done using the F word.
You know, I was 10 when I started, so he still thought I was a superhero.
He's 15 now.
(19:54):
So he's starting to get, he's starting to roll his eyes a little bit, but you know, on the
times when it's, and this is an important thing I mentioned in the book several times
about involving our kids in our planning and our plans, but you know, he knows his roles
in emergencies and practices them willingly with me.
Um, you know, I think I got another six months before I'm just the stupidest person he's
(20:16):
ever met, but we'll see.
Well, it's, I always like to, I, this is attributed to Mark Twain, but he, you know, he's got this
quote where he, I, I think, I don't think it's apocryphal.
I think some, I, this is a summary, but you know, he says when, when I was growing up in
the house, um, I thought my parents were the dumbest people on the face of the earth.
And then I went off to college and when I returned, I was amazed at how much they had
(20:40):
learned and, uh, you know, so the hope, the hope is always that, yeah, the light bulb turns
on a little bit and I'm in perspective shifts a little bit and they see obviously out in
the real world that, uh, some of these, these principles and these guides are, are helpful
and they actually, you know, they actually touch on, on real life.
Um, what you've mentioned a few here, just, just recently, practical things.
(21:02):
Have there been other things that you've kind of had the aha with that you've implemented
in the midst of this project?
And you've just said to yourself, man, I'm glad I, I did that.
Or man, I'm glad that someone told me about that so that I could be prepared for it.
Is it anything that kind of comes to your mind there?
But there's all kinds of little things.
Um, and some of them aren't like, whew, I'm glad I did that.
(21:25):
That's, it was would have gotten really bad if I hadn't.
But, um, for example, I was telling Andrew before the show started that we spent last year in
Crete and, uh, some of the travel advice there that I got for that chapter shows up little
things.
Like if you're in a developed nation, you want a hotel room between the second and the seventh
(21:46):
floor because first floor is an invitation to break in anything above seven.
You can't be sure that the ladder trucks will reach your room.
Sure.
Okay.
Yeah.
And that goes down to four.
If you're in a developing nation.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Um, little things like that or advice about, you know, when you're traveling, uh, keep,
(22:08):
keep enough money to buy a trinket or pay for your meal in the front pocket and then keep
the other cash in other pockets.
But whenever you have to count or exchange money, go to the bathroom, sit down in the
stall and do it there.
Mm-hmm.
That's good.
That's good advice.
Is there something that you, you found that kind of just really surprised you, uh, when
(22:29):
you look back at the lessons that you've learned over these 101 safety tips, is there one that
surprised you that you were, you didn't really expect it kind of came out of nowhere?
Oh yeah.
So, you know, that, that code word that we all got taught when we were kids, we've maybe
taught our kids where if we can't come get you at school or we can't come get you at soccer
practice, or we can't come get you at your parkour lessons.
(22:52):
Uh, here's a code word that somebody you don't know will know to tell you if I have to send
like, you know, my, my office mate secretary to come get you.
Right.
We we've heard this, we might be applying it.
Yeah.
Terrible idea.
We shouldn't do it.
Um, the reason being, um, number one, they've tested it and the kids who are the age to need
(23:14):
that can't remember it under pressure.
And number two, it's a secret.
How close does a child stand to somebody to somebody when they're telling secrets
with an arms?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Close.
Yep.
Yep.
So the kid leans in to tell the secret and then they're.
(23:36):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Grab.
You know, I want to again, reiterate that strangers kidnapping kids is very, very, very,
very, very, very, very rare.
Uh, but this thing that was designed to prevent that actually makes it easier to do.
So the advice is actually, so imagine a situation where you or your spouse or the two or three
(23:56):
other people who pick them up on the regular can't do it.
They can't make it.
Uh, what would happen if you just called them and said, you're going to be late and to watch
your kid until you can show up.
You trust those people with your kids because they're there already.
Most of them like you and your kids and they're professionals.
And this isn't the first time it's happened to them.
(24:19):
And in the real big blow up emergencies, like a school, your school, your church, your karate
school, whatever the facility is probably safer, more comfortable than your house anyway.
Hmm.
So.
For me.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That makes a lot.
That makes a lot of sense.
Yeah.
(24:39):
Yeah.
Um, what are, uh, as you think about this book, I, you know, uh, it's a, it's a labor of love.
You're, you're sort of birthing this thing out into the, into the world.
Um, what, what is your hope for it?
What, what, when you think about, uh, those that are potentially, uh, getting this and implementing
(25:00):
it, um, what do you really hope kind of in your, in your heart of hearts that, um, you
know, comes out of people interacting with it?
I've got kind of a personal goal and a professional goal.
Personal goal is real simple.
I wanted to save somebody's life.
I want a kid to survive into adulthood and have kids and grandkids of their own and make
a difference in the world because their parents read a chapter in this book at some point.
(25:25):
Um, you know, I don't want any family to go through the experience that it would require
for that to happen because I'm not a, I'm not a monster, but yeah, that's, that's what
I want for the book.
That's why I'm putting it out in the world.
And I hope that happens.
Yeah.
Um, on a professional level, there's a book called the gift of fear by Gavin DeBecker,
(25:48):
which is like the go-to personal safety book and has been since the mid nineties.
And that guy wrote a book called protecting the gift, which has been the go-to parental
safety book.
You go, you know, you call 20 martial arts school today and do it that five times.
You've called a hundred martial arts schools and ask him, Hey, what book should I buy?
I just became a parent.
Uh, 90 of them will recommend protecting the gift.
(26:08):
And I want to just, I would outsell it.
I want to replace its, its spot in the, in the ecosystem.
I want it to be the new protecting the gift.
Awesome.
Awesome.
So what, what sparked you on to this whole project?
Not just the, not just the book itself, but, you know, think way back into the blog and
the podcast that you, that you started, like what actually started that for you to go, Hey,
(26:33):
you know, cause you said yourself, you know, I was, I was doing a bunch of different things
before I did this and I changed it and did this.
So what sparred that on to go, Hey, I want to start this safety thing.
So the very first seed goes back to 2008.
And that was the year I adopted my oldest son.
And at that time I was running a martial arts school.
(26:54):
I had, I think I had four degrees of black belt.
I had bodyguard assignments.
I had worked as a bouncer.
I had done very stupid things in very stupid places and came back still alive.
Um, you know, I kind of thought I was a badass and, um, this adoption was, it was a in family
extended family adoption where dad wasn't in the picture and mom became medically incapable
(27:17):
of caring for him further.
And so it was, it wasn't, you know, try with your wife for nine for a year and a half and
then have nine months of warning.
And it wasn't folks who have adopted.
No, it is often a very long process.
It was, Oh shit.
I've got a kid.
Um, and I remember the weekend before we transferred him over before he came to live with us, I was
(27:44):
practicing some weapon disarms with some people at the seminar.
And then we're doing some gun disarms and every single one of them, you kind of, the
guns pointed out, you get to turn, you capture the gun and you pull past you down at about
hip level, which keeps me from getting shot.
But if there's a seven year old, he was seven at the time standing directly behind me, which
is where I'd probably want him to be standing.
(28:06):
If there was trouble, it points the gun directly at him.
I was like, hold on.
Wait just one damn minute here.
And I realized and kind of thought about it, realized how little of the training I'd had
and the experiences that had had anything to do with protecting a child.
And then I kind of broadened that to, and that's just my crime prevention, self-defense
(28:30):
stuff.
I was even dumber about fire prevention.
I had a first aid certification from back when I was a camp counselor when I was 19.
You know, when I went to re up my first aid stuff, they'd added AED since the last time
I'd gotten the card.
Yeah.
And just from there, I realized how ignorant I was.
And then because I've had very good coaches, my immediate response to being ignorant is go
(28:54):
find people who aren't and just ring them drive information.
And that's kind of how the project started.
And, uh, and, uh, the podcast and the book idea and all that was my COVID seizure.
Gotcha.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The, uh, I think about Andy, like our show began just before, just before COVID.
And I, I think to myself, like, uh, how lucky we were to start it beforehand.
(29:20):
Cause I'm, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not sure we would have, uh, yeah, I'm not sure we would
have, uh, reacted the same way, reacted the same way.
But yeah, I think, you know, Jason, it's really, I think it's just a really, really cool thing
that, uh, there's people out there in the world like you that are kind of taking me all
these things in and helping give some practical advice without being an alarmist.
(29:44):
I mean, like you said, I mean, some of these scenarios, they are, they may or may not ever
happen to us.
We may or may not find ourselves in those situations, but we hope we never, we hope
we never do.
But, um, you know, in a world where prevention is, uh, well, whatever the saying is, what an
(30:05):
ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
You know, um, these things are, these things are helpful to be, to not just, I mean, just
not be generally ignorant about, you know, and to, and to realize that, cause I think so
many of the things that you're talking about are pretty simple preventative things that the
vast majority of us can, uh, can approach if we just give some brain power to it and, uh,
(30:29):
you know, and, and, and think about it for a second.
Um, and, and maybe even uncover some, uh, you know, some liabilities that we have, uh,
you know, in, in areas that are also, uh, you know, more readily, uh, approachable and,
um, you know, the, uh, I, I was talking with, oh gosh, mental, this came from a mental health
(30:55):
professional that I was engaging with and really had the conversation about, you know, the people
that are frequently the most traumatized by things are the naive, um, is it's naivety that
is, you know, that, oh, that probably won't happen or those things can't happen or, or,
or whatever that when it does catches them so off guard that they are, they're the most damaged
(31:21):
by it, you know, physically, mentally, emotionally, all of that.
So there's that, there's the, you know, this can't be happening.
There's the what's happening and there's the, how dare this happen?
All three of which just slow down the time between the bad things happening and you developing
(31:42):
an appropriate plan.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So thinking about it ahead of time, having a plan ahead of time, it's also really just an
investment in your own, in your own wellbeing of, if I hear what you're saying correctly,
you know, of just, uh, shortening our reaction time and also giving clarity to our reaction
(32:04):
and what we're going to do.
And that little bit of, uh, that little bit of insight, just, uh, it's of, of, of great
help.
Obviously there's a ton of variables out in the world, the things that we have zero control
over, but the things that we do have control over, we should take seriously.
And, uh, that's a, that's a really, really great reminder.
So, yeah.
And as you say, this, the stuff we can do is fairly simple.
(32:26):
It's scary, but it's not hard.
You know, things, things like stocking your first aid kit.
So that when you're, so when your idiot brother who's living in the house puts a broken mug in
the trash bag and your idiot self drags that to the curb and gives themselves a spear wound
in the calf, you have Coban wrap and a trauma pad ready to hand.
(32:51):
I'll tell you, Jason's example there was strikingly lifelike and, uh, seemingly, uh, parallel, parallel to reality.
Um, purely hypothetical, purely hypothetical.
It sounded totally.
I'm not that dumb.
Yeah.
But we do get caught out.
Um, uh, we got, we got a new car relatively recently and I was driving from Portland to
(33:15):
Denver to do a seminar and I had a blowout on the side of the road in Idaho.
So I pull over and, you know, it's a two lane highway in Idaho with trucks, blast and pass at
85 and about, and a shoulder that's maybe a six inches wider than my car.
And that's when I realized I have no idea.
How to find the donut and the equipment in this car that I just bought a month ago.
(33:40):
So I'm on the side of the road on YouTube.
Okay.
Best case scenario.
Yeah.
You know, you catch yourself out.
Yeah.
And it's just, and having those, that systematic approach, the small things, the tips, the
list and all of that to keep you and your family safe.
You know, my kids, my youngest is 15.
He's got his permit before he's allowed to have his license.
(34:01):
He's going to change the tire on the truck at least twice.
Yep.
Yep.
Yep.
Yep.
Those, those skills that we often, uh, we often forget about, but, uh, I know that was
the requirement and that was a requirement for me.
And, uh, you know, it's a simple things like that.
So all great stuff.
That's a really, really great.
Again, Jason, you can put that, uh, you can put that book back up right, right, right front
(34:25):
and center here again.
Uh, obviously safest family on the block.
101 tips, tricks, hacks, and habits to protect your family by esteemed author, Jason Brick.
Fantastic.
Yeah.
We're going to, well, we'll obviously make sure that we have that all over at dudes and dads
dot com and the show notes, uh, links to the book, uh, for all of you to hop on it.
(34:48):
What a great, you know what I'll say?
You know, I'll say Indy both mother's day and then father's day coming up.
Great gifts.
Great gifts.
Yeah.
Great practical gifts for, uh, the people that, that love us the most, our moms and dads to
have that as a little bit of a, of a manual, if you will.
Yes.
Ready to go.
(35:08):
Absolutely.
Well, thanks Jason for joining us, but Hey, before we go, we can't let you get by.
Thank you.
Without having the pop quiz.
So if you've never joined us, the pop quiz at a time that we just like to pepper Jason
with questions for things that may or may not have to do with safety, but things that we
think we just want to get to know him a little bit better.
(35:30):
There we go.
So there we go outside of the safety realm.
Yeah.
Most likely.
So Joel, do you want to ask it first?
I do.
I'm going to take actually, and I'm going to take a question out of your playbook, uh, because
I think it's appropriate for Jason, Jason currently, what is your favorite gadget?
My favorite gadget.
Okay.
So I'm going to, I'm going to go back in the martial arts stuff.
(35:51):
Just took a class on using a carabiner as a self-defense weapon.
And it was brutal.
It's not like, um, you don't use it just like brass knuckles, but you slide it down to here
to Paul.
Oh, and just a slap upside the head is now dental work.
Interesting.
Oh man.
And let alone doing like joint locks and stuff, you know?
(36:13):
Yeah.
You do a joint lock.
It hurts.
You do a joint lock with a carabiner grinding against your bones.
It's absolute misery.
Wow.
It was so cool for friends.
I've friends.
I've got to say the carabiner around this myth that I've gotten, we've got to, we might
have to find a larger size, but, uh, I don't know if they make it, but I'm, I'm going to
now I'm, I'm curious.
We're going to, can I find a carabiner that will fit around my hand done?
(36:36):
Yes, you can.
Okay.
Okay.
I did a lot of rock climbing in college and I can, they're out there.
Okay.
Wonderful.
Awesome.
Jason, what is something that you want
to be... No, sorry. What is one thing that...
Something... Sorry.
I can't read my own card today.
What is something that you like that most people
don't like?
Oh, the movie Hudson
(36:57):
Hawk. I don't know
that I've seen that. It's an old
Bruce Willis movie where he's a cat burglary.
He does it with Danny Aiello. Hudson Hawk,
yes. Weird movie
where the cat burglars
for precision timing, because remember,
Bruce Willis had a brief
recording career there.
So he and Danny Aiello,
(37:18):
to get their pinpoint timing in their capers,
they choose a song and sing it.
And it turns into this weird...
Yeah, it's... Everybody
panned it. Everybody hates it. People make fun of me.
But I love that movie. It makes me belly laugh
every single time.
Alright. Well, there you go. Now everybody
knows. That's fantastic.
Jason, real personal question.
(37:38):
Are you a fan of Soup?
Soup? Yes.
Although I like stews better.
Okay. Tell me your favorite, and then we'll go with that.
Tell me about your favorite stew.
Mulligatani.
What in the world?
Yeah, tell me about that.
You've been interested in something new.
What's going on?
Mulligatani is what happened
(37:59):
when Irish troops stationed
in India missed stew.
Because stew's not really a traditionally Irish dish.
So it is a
chicken stew
with lentils and curry.
Oh, okay.
And when I make it, I blend the lentils.
So it's this creamy,
curry-tasting
chicken stew
with celery
(38:19):
and onions.
And it's
amazeballs.
Andy, I feel like this might be
the first
exciting culinary dish
that's been introduced to us
during
a pop quiz.
Now, I know that
we were introduced to,
if you remember,
Dudes and Dad's alumni,
Sebastiano Rosso,
(38:39):
once told us about
Zuppa de Mare,
which is his
favorite
Sicilian
dish.
But
now we've gotten
culinary insight
even into the making
of one.
And we're going to look this up.
We're going to Google it.
We're going to find out.
We should make it on the podcast.
There we go.
That's it.
Dudes and Dad's
Dudes and Dad's
(38:59):
Our Soup Edition.
Great.
Jason, tell me.
I'll send you the recipe.
It's done.
All right.
Perfect.
Let's do it.
Which living person
do you most admire?
Oh,
I wish you'd asked me that
three months ago
because it would have been
my grandmother.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, grandma.
Oh, yeah.
So there's a fellow
(39:20):
named Dave McNeil
who runs the Goju Shore
who ran the Goju Shore
weapon system
until he retired
a couple years ago.
And he's just
a deeply kind,
deeply weird,
deeply funny guy.
And, you know,
whenever I, you know,
I respect my father
very much as well.
But, you know,
when I come to a crossroads,
it's often what would David do?
(39:41):
Wonderful.
Wonderful.
Joel, do you have a last question?
My last question to Jason
is,
Jason, if
there were,
oh, we're going to steal
another one from you
because I like this.
Because we're going to say
on the food thing real quick.
Jason, if there was a
sandwich named after you,
what would it,
what would it be?
What would,
what would be on it?
(40:01):
What would be on it?
Is that what it is?
Yeah.
Yeah.
If you like go to the deli,
you're like,
hey, I'll have a,
have an order of the Jason Brick.
What,
what is that sandwich exactly?
so it's going to have a,
so it's going to have a hatched green chili.
It's from New Mexico.
And if you do that,
then it's going to need
probably turkey or chicken
and then a white cheese
like provolone
(40:22):
or maybe mozzarella.
Okay.
Maybe Gruyere,
but maybe that might not,
that might not work too well.
Throw some,
throw some lettuce
and a couple of tomatoes,
a little salt and pepper
on top of that,
a little bit of mayo.
And then you dip it
in your Malkatonic.
It's a callback.
That's a callback.
Within.
Yeah.
(40:42):
Love it.
All sorts of new things
in the podcast today.
Jason,
you've just unlocked
some new worlds for us.
Thank you so much.
Awesome.
Awesome.
Awesome.
Well,
Hey everybody,
Jason,
thanks for being with us.
We will be,
as we said in the show notes,
we'll get the,
the book out,
make sure people can find it
and on the socials.
Thanks for joining us.
Appreciate it so much,
my friend,
all the way from the West coast.
Andy.
(41:03):
Hey,
it's been real.
It's been fun.
Remind people where they can call us.
We want to,
let's get another voicemail in.
Okay.
Can we do it?
We would love to have another voicemail.
Five,
seven,
four,
five,
zero,
one,
four,
four,
six,
seven,
again,
five,
seven,
four,
five,
zero,
one,
four,
four,
six,
seven,
or reach out to us on the Gmails
at dudes and dads podcast at gmail.com.
(41:25):
You can leave us all kinds of ideas,
reviews,
all that.
Hey,
like,
subscribe,
follow,
high five,
tell your friends,
tell your friends about the dudes and dads podcast.
Caring is sharing and sharing is caring as we say sometimes.
And go get the book for your mom and dad or people in the life that you care for.
Yeah,
yeah,
yeah,
exactly.
(41:45):
If you don't get them,
this book,
do you actually care about them?
That's what you should be asking.
Hey,
everybody,
we,
we,
we thank you so much for hanging out with us for another episode.
And until next time,
we wish you grace and peace.
you
you
you
you
you
Okay.
you
you
you
you
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