March 27, 2025 • 32 mins
What if the secret to a stronger marriage was as simple as laughing together more often? In this refreshingly candid episode, we dive into the surprising power of humor in relationships—including those awkward bedroom moments that couples rarely discuss publicly.
Marriage shouldn't feel like a business arrangement where two people fulfill assigned roles without joy or genuine connection. Yet many couples fall into exactly this pattern, maintaining careful facades and losing the playfulness that initially drew them together. We explore how breaking down these barriers through shared laughter creates deeper intimacy and resilience through life's challenges.
Drawing from both scientific research and biblical wisdom, we examine how humor physiologically changes our brain chemistry—reducing stress hormones and increasing feel-good neurotransmitters that strengthen our bonds. As Voltaire noted and Scripture confirms, "a cheerful heart is good medicine," offering couples a powerful tool for diffusing tension and gaining perspective during disagreements.
Through personal stories of financial hardship, loss, and everyday frustrations, we demonstrate how maintaining a sense of humor proved essential for our own relationship survival. When the enemy seeks to steal our joy and destroy our marriages through constant stress and distraction, intentional laughter becomes an act of spiritual warfare.
With your days numbered by God before birth, why spend them in needless misery? Tonight, do something unexpected to make your spouse laugh. Your marriage—and your testimony—will be stronger for it. Questions about strengthening your relationship? Reach out to us at info@missioncent.org or find us on social media.
https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/bringing-laughter-into-your-marriage/
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Alright, on this episode of Faith, family and
Fishing, we are headed to aplace that I don't think many
family podcasts get to.
So let me ask you this do youfart in bed?
So this episode I'm not goingto lie, lie could be a little
(00:33):
embarrassing.
Actually.
For you it's gonna be a lotembarrassing for me.
For me, it's not asembarrassing nothing embarrasses
you not just that, it's socialstigma, right.
So we're in this how-to series.
We're looking at how tostrengthen marriages, how to
strengthen families, how to getback to what God designed this
for, because God designed familywith a very specific task of
(00:55):
handling all of the differentemotional support and just being
the first place where you'rediscipled.
So in this how-to like lastweek, we looked at how-to anger,
right.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Okay, well, not last week, two weeks ago.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Our last episode.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
This one Mm-hmm.
Okay, I'm not going to justshoot out with what it is,
because I think the best way todo this is you like to build
anticipation?
It's not just buildinganticipation.
You got to put it in context,like everything is in context
right, like when, even if welook at like biblical study,
exegesis versus eisegesis.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Right.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
When we're, we're putting ourself into context or
we're trying to, you know, pullout the context of a scriptural
text.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Where exegesis is.
You're reading it exactly howit was written.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
You're extracting no, no you're, you're pulling out
of what was in there ineisegesis.
You're putting yourself yourselfin your david your problems are
goliath right as matt chamlerfamously said, that is not the
case, so I need to put this intocontext before we get into the
how-to.
Here's the deal when peoplelook at us, like people look at
(02:05):
me and you, all right, and youcan go on social media and see a
picture of me and debbie allday long uh, youtube, like it is
all over the place.
If there was a strange smell,oh god.
Like, let's say, hypotheticallyspeaking, we're at lowe's, okay
(02:26):
, and it's me, you and the kids,we're at the cash register, and
all of the sudden, it's justyou and the cashier in this like
strange thick smell and you'renowhere to be found.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
You've left it there for me to be embarrassed and to
be looked at like what is wrongwith this one, but automatically
.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
What is everyone going to think?
Speaker 2 (02:49):
right, god, did she just pass gas?
Speaker 1 (02:51):
no, they're not even gonna think, did she.
They're gonna look at me and go.
He farted and walked away rightwell, because you're laughing
as you walk away but regardless,even if I wasn't, even if I'm
just like stone-faced, they'restill gonna look at and go.
He farted and walked away,right, I think that.
I think that is an unfairassessment.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
How is that unfair.
It's accurate.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
Here's why In our household, okay.
The title of the episode is isdo you fart in bed?
Oh okay, so gosh.
So in our house, serious in ourhousehold, oh my jesus, people
(03:37):
would look at me and go he's thestinky one right like what did
I just exegete from what youjust said?
I'm just saying like in societyin general, men are looked at
like you're the stinky,unhygienic ones, and women are
looked at like you're the clean.
Like never, far like never,like none of that.
(03:59):
And I'm just saying that thatmay or may not be true in our
household.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Okay, saying that that may or may not be true in
our household.
Okay, I want you to think veryabout what you're saying and how
you're saying it.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
We have been married for 20 plus years so far I'm not
saying that you are in any waydirty and not hygienic.
You were probably air on thethe side of overly clean.
What I'm saying is, sometimesthat smell isn't me, is what I'm
(04:35):
getting at see people don'trealize very natural.
Not in that way, not in thatway.
What?
Speaker 2 (04:45):
is wrong with you.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
You eat a lot of like fresh, good food, like produce
and vegetables, and all of thatand a natural process of all of
that is is going to break downinto gas, right?
No one ever looks at a woman,though, and goes she farts.
Why are you staring at me?
(05:10):
It should not shock anyonelistening to this podcast that
you have gas.
If you are listening to thispodcast, you fart oh my god.
Is that not true?
Speaker 2 (05:26):
it's like our first episode the whole.
Do you pray when you poop?
Speaker 1 (05:29):
is it true that everyone farts?
Yes, you die okay, if youdidn't thank you, because it
build up of gas.
Gas will bust an iron pipe.
It sure will pressure now.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Now, why I bring this up is because title is I want
you to know the way you prefacedit made it sound like I'm
walking around, like I stink nonot at all, not at all.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
That is not at all how I was trying to mean
anything or anything like that.
What I'm saying, though becausethe title of the episode is Do
you Fart in Bed, or somethingalong those lines, because I'm
going to let AI pick the title,but it definitely deals with a
lot of Gas.
So you need all of thatbackground information that we
(06:11):
just discussed.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
In order to understand.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Where we're going, what this episode actually is.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
Because that's what this episode was actually built
out of.
Because if you look at mostpeople, most people treat life
like like a business.
I guess is the easiest way tosay it.
They treat what like that lifeokay like in your marriage is no
different.
You have your roles, I have myroles.
As long as everybody's meetingtheir roles, everything's all
(06:37):
good right right so in fightingshadows, one of the things.
Fighting shadows yes, in thebook fighting shadows, um, one
of the things that not just mereading, okay it's, it's the men
of the church, um, one of thethings that they, they were
talking about last week.
We, we looked at futility,right and, and just it gets very
(06:57):
easy, um, to look at life andgo what's what's the point, Like
you know, and it kind of playsinto the apathy thing that we're
going into right now, but oneof the things to battle futility
is to play, okay, and and I'mgonna say this, I get to use the
(07:18):
word caveat again.
With this caveat, I love thatword you should not be 30 years
old still playing video games,and that is your life.
Okay, okay so when I use theword play.
That's not what I'm talkingabout Right, right, right.
I'm not saying that you shouldnever if that's who you are like
play video games.
I don't.
I fish, you know I get outside,hence the fishing episode.
(07:41):
Like I mean, that's what I'mgoing to spend my spare time
doing.
Now, what that word play meansis sometimes you have to
disconnect from life and you gotto live somewhere else in this
world, right?
Speaker 2 (07:57):
OK.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
So, like last night, we took an hour, hour and a half
, something like that Drove outto the beach, did some fishing,
got some tournament entries,stopped and had some tacos on
the way home.
Got home, took showers, went tobed.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Right.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
For those, and I think you know it wasn't just an
hour and a half- we werefishing for an hour and a half
at the beach.
We were out for about three,three and a half four hours.
Speaker 2 (08:21):
Kids got to swim, they got to see the you know
they got to swim with seaturtles.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
You know I got to catch some fish.
You know me and you got to justhang out, that is play.
Too many of us do not play inour marriage.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
Right.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
Everything is just like.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Serious and business.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
You have your things, I have my things, I sit here
and go, do you fart in?
Speaker 2 (08:46):
bed, because if you answer no, you're boring, well
you, this bores me not just thatyes, you are boring, though but
more importantly, why?
Speaker 1 (09:02):
why don't you?
Are you still trying to put afacade on?
Because, like I remember, likewhen we first started dating, I
wouldn't even use the bathroomat your parents' house?
That is true, I would leavethat If I had to go, and I'm
pretty good at holding it.
But if I had to go, I got torun up to the store real quick.
I got to get out of here.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
That's the facade you're putting up right, Because
you facade you're putting upright because you don't want
anyone to look at you a certainkind of way, you don't want to
leave the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
Oh my god, you don't want to get enough of that you
don't want to leave the bathroomin that kind of shape right or
smell, and then you know peoplelook at you like did you do that
?
Got some gi issues going on,huh.
So we put this facade on.
(09:48):
But a lot of us carry thatfacade throughout our whole
marriage too that's true and andwe never get to the point where
we're just free yeah, we neverget to the point where there's
any kind of playing, wherethere's inside jokes and there's
laughing and and all of thisand and that is like incredibly
detrimental to your marriage Ifthere is no fun in your marriage
(10:11):
.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Right.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
It's like a business relationship, it's a job.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Right, like you're with a coworker.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Right, you got a roommate.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Right.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Hey, you guys sleep in the same bed.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Right, maybe you pay bills together, maybe, maybe,
and that's a that.
Hey, you guys sleep in the samebed, right?
Speaker 1 (10:25):
you pay bills together, maybe, maybe and even
and and that's a differentpodcast paying bills together
because I go.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
We had the same bank account from when we were still
dating, um, not that long either, and I'm not saying I recommend
that for everybody.
I mean it worked.
Or did you get with me for my?
Speaker 1 (10:40):
millions?
I did not.
I mean it worked for us.
Nor did you get with me for mymillions.
I did not.
The joke would have been on you.
But I go something like thisand hopefully you guys I mean
that laughing during the introof this that's real laughs,
right, because farts they'refunny.
(11:01):
I mean, no matter what thesituation is, Josh is cracking
up A well-placed fart willdiffuse any situation, like I
could be like yelling at thekids, like just irate blood
boiling mad, and if one of themjust like it, just you're
(11:22):
immediately laughing.
And what happens when you laugh?
Speaker 2 (11:24):
well, your serotonin goes up, your dopamine goes up,
your cortisol goes down.
You literally have aphysiological reaction in your
body that starts decompressingyou from the inside out.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Voltaire.
Okay, just because you keptlooking, yeah and focus on the
family.
That had this great write-upabout bringing humor into your
marriage.
Right and seriously.
You know, since 2020 ish, Idon't know why it just seems
like there's nothing funnyanymore, like like life is just
(11:57):
serious and that's it.
Don't play with anything.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Right.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
But it it starts with this the more you laugh
together, the more you love yourspouse.
And and I go, I agree with that.
Right, like you are my bestfriend, why would we not have
jokes?
Why would we not play aroundwith each other?
Why would we not make eachother laugh?
Some of the best dates we'veever been on have been in our
(12:22):
room.
You know, just laughing, justtalking and laughing and joking,
maybe watching, you know, afunny movie or something on
something funny that happenedfarting right in the bed I mean
I I will never pass up thatopportunity that is true like if
, if I can, I'm dutch oveningall day like just throwing them
(12:44):
blankets over Debbie's head andlet's let it go and not even
saying a word.
Well, I think, if you say it,though, it ruins the joke.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
It does ruin the joke .
Speaker 1 (12:52):
The ambiance is you can't bask in the ambiance, then
you know.
But it also says the mostwasted of all days is one
without laughter.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Yes, I agree with that, and I go.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
There's just so much that laughter brings to any
relationship you have.
We're going to lookspecifically at your marriage,
but any relationship, um, andwhat I was going to say is
voltaire said that, um, and yougot to give me a second to find
(13:26):
it.
I'm not the quickest reader.
The art of medicine consists ofamusing the patient while
nature cures the disease.
And it's funny because modernresearch indicates that people
with a sense of humor have fewersymptoms of physical illness
than those who are less humorous.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
That's interesting.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
The Bible even tells us a cheerful heart is good
medicine.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
Yeah, that's true.
I love a good laugh too, andyou know that I love seeing
people laugh.
I like hearing kids laugh.
I love, love laughter.
Speaker 1 (14:01):
But everywhere you look, right Everywhere, whether
it's psychology, whether it'shistory, whether it's biblically
, everywhere you look there'slaughter, there's joy, there's
all of these things, becauseit's impossible to be mad and
laughing at the same time.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Right, right right.
Unless you're Joker Well thenthat's a whole different.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
But even then, I don think the joker's like mad.
I just think he's chaos, like Ijust think he's chaotic okay
you know, I don't think he'slike angry.
I don't think he's sitting here,you know, going.
I have this vendetta.
I just think he's sitting here,going.
I want to burn it all down.
Right, of course you wouldlaugh and I go, but it's the
(14:44):
same thing, right?
Everyone's heard from the timeyou were little laughter is the
best medicine.
That's why I think about itlike something traumatic happens
in our life and and I'll be thefirst one to admit there have
been times I I err more on thetimes of that was an
inappropriate time to make ajoke.
You know, you, you get terriblenews or something of that we
(15:07):
had to put our dog down yepright and I don't know.
It's been a couple of weeks itwas not a couple of weeks, it
might have been a couple ofweeks a week, and you know,
we're driving home from work andI'm like, hey, when we get home
, don't forget, let the dog out.
Yep, you know, and for the kids, like they're like a state of
shock at well no, because ittook them a minute first to
(15:29):
realize oh there, we can't lethim out, he's right, he's gone,
and then it's like daddy, andthen you know the laughing comes
in why?
because laughter helps you copewith that right.
Laughter helps you get throughthose very stressful, very like
like I've been accused of nottaking things serious enough and
(15:51):
and and I think there is a lineon that side, right, I think
time and place, right, you knowyou should know.
Okay, now is not the time orthe place to to drop that.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Right.
Um whether it's passing gas orno there's never.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
There's never, not a time for that, but when,
honestly, like if you sit downand you think of your
relationship with your spouse,when was the last time you guys
just sat down and laughed rightlike when was the last time you
just went like hey, like I heardthis knock, knock who's there?
Oh, I don't actually have one,but when was the last time you,
you know, I heard this joke.
I heard, you know.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
Whatever the case may be, send each other funny memes
, funny little shorts or becausewhat if one of you isn't on
social media?
Speaker 1 (16:39):
right and then you just get funny memes sent to you
.
That's true.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
I do sometimes send them to JT to show you if you
guys are together, because Iknow you won't go on there.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
But I go think about it.
It is very, very hard to remainangry at someone.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
If you're laughing.
Speaker 1 (17:02):
Jay Leno said that.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Right, and you're not saying every situation needs to
be just thrown under the rugbecause there's laughter.
But if you're in a relationshipand you I mean you're with your
spouse and laugh with your kidstoo, have jokes with them pull
the mic a little right here.
There you go laugh with yourkids.
You know, everything doesn'thave to be so serious and stern,
(17:25):
and I've had to learn that overthe years that I can laugh at
stuff.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
I can laugh at myself so there's a movie that came
back out in the early maybe late90s, early 2000s, somewhere
there and the main character andand you know what, if you're
gonna google who said this andand you're gonna find the movie
that way, I mean more power toyou.
Um, I'm not going to say thename of the movie because I
don't want to seem like I'mendorsing it, because it's not a
(17:50):
movie you should sit down andwatch.
It's not a terrible movie.
It was Van Wilder.
Okay, let's just go through it,I said it anyway.
Definitely slapstick humor verylow-hanging fruit jokes, but he
does.
Ryan Reynolds has a line inthat in which he says don't
worry too much about life,You'll never make it out alive.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
And that's true.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
And maybe someone said that line before him, but
that's where I know it from andI go.
That's the problem.
It's true.
Think about the things that wehave stressed about throughout
our life.
And I mean and there's been aton of them.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
Um, you know, if we go back, you know 2008 to 2012
rough like I was seriously, Iwas hoping that the Mayan
calendar was correct and thatthe world was going to end in
2012.
Speaker 2 (18:44):
Because I was.
I was like.
You know.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
I'm done with this Like this sucks.
It was exhausting, um, we bothlost our jobs.
I mean, we were homeless for aminute, like you know literally
lost.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
When we say lost everything, not like, oh, we
only had a few hundred dollarsin the account, we literally had
zero right and and if it wasn'tnegative and if it wasn't for a
family, um, I don't know howthat they would have looked
completely different than whatit did.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Um, you know, and, and you know, by God's grace,
you know, we came through theother side, but, like I remember
, during even those times whereit was like man, you didn't even
want to put one foot in frontof the other because you'd lost
any sense of hope any sense ofjoy, any sense of and, and you
know, like I said, I was lookingat this going.
Hey, they said december 21st2012 is the end of the world.
Like, bring it, bring it.
Like let's go and I go.
How do you get at that point?
You stop laughing yep, becauseyou go this is life-changing and
(19:37):
therefore cannot be humorous inany way, shape or form.
And on the other side of that,I mean, here we are 13 years
later, on the other side of that, looking back, we can look at
it and go man, how much time didwe waste not enjoying moments,
(20:00):
the moments that God had givenus to begin with.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
And we can look back now at situations and kind of
giggle at them.
You know laughing at literallyselling shoes so we can go to
the gas station and get the kidsslurpees.
You know going to certainstores to sell some whatever we
had, having garage sales thatpeople stole from just walking
around Lowe's and making mentallist of hey you know, maybe one
(20:23):
day we can get this van.
Maybe one day we can, you know,laughing with the kids when you
would, you know, tell theirlittle stories underneath the
blanket and they're you knowgiggling and laughing making
forts.
You know, thankfully God wasgracious in you know putting us
together Because I had a reallyhard time and you always kept,
(20:45):
especially at the end of the day, when I was just done.
You always kept that going,especially for the kids where
they had that opportunity tojust giggle and laugh when I was
completely done.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
I'm not saying that there's never a time to take
yourself seriously.
I'm not saying that there'snever a time to you know, put
aside jokes and stuff.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Sure, yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
I am saying that those times should be further.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
And few between.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Than most of us take it Right.
Most of us, I mean, we stressabout everything.
Speaker 2 (21:19):
Everything.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Matthew 6.
That's what Jesus is talkingabout, right?
Why be be anxious for tomorrow?
Tomorrow has its own worries,yep, and, and that's what it is
like it's sitting here puttinginto perspective, right.
Humor helps us cope, humorhelps us de-stress, humor helps
us to be able to disconnect fromreality and and in and in doing
(21:40):
so, it allows us theopportunity now to look at it
and go okay, hold on, let me seethis for what it really is is
this something that is reallylife-altering?
Speaker 2 (21:54):
and does it need to consume every waking moment
right?
Speaker 1 (21:56):
because, honestly, if the devil can get you to sit
there and just fixate onsomething, and get you to sit
here and go, well, what aboutthis?
Speaker 2 (22:05):
What about that?
Speaker 1 (22:06):
Seriously.
If the devil can steal your joy, he will if you let him and
then you're going to be amiserable human being that
nobody wants to be around.
And you don't want to be aroundanyone.
Speaker 2 (22:17):
And I, uh, I read this thing and said if you know,
the devil knows he can't haveyou because you already belong
to God, but if he can keep youdistracted, he will.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:26):
And so, no, you know, no one can take my children
from me, but, you know, keepthem distracted.
That's the same thing the devildoes to us.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
But even if we look at like Philippians, 4.13, right
, one of the most famous versesin the Bible.
Thanks, Tim Tebow, you know youknow, I can do all things
through christ, who gives mestrength, but if you back up
before that, and read why he'spaul, sitting here and going hey
, I have found the secret ofbeing content.
I know what it's like to have alittle.
I know what it's like to have alot.
I know what it's like to starve.
(22:53):
I know what it's like to feastright, but I'm convinced of this
, that I can do all thingsthrough christ, who gives me
strength?
Right, it's sitting here goinghey, like at the end of the day
I mean, and again with paul, yougot to look at him and go, hey,
he has this mentality ofsitting here going.
You know what are you gonna doto me?
Philippians, one right, threechapters before this.
He sits here and goes for me tolive as christ, to die as gain.
(23:16):
There's nothing you can do tosomeone like that right like oh
okay, you know I'm gonna put youin jail, cool right because I'm
gonna preach to people in jailpreach the walls off literally,
I have a prison ministry, allright, well, we're gonna, you
know behead you.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Well, the world's gonna know that I died for jesus
you know, and, and so I go it.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
But we get stuck in these rap, uh, not routes ruts
our lives and like the happinessis just gone, and that's not.
The joy is just gone, thesmiles are just gone.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
Things aren't going to go wrong and things aren't
going wrong, but no, they will.
But they're, but they're wronganyway.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
So why not take some time to enjoy some laughs and
giggles and, you know, watchfunny videos, talk about funny
things that happened, you know,and honestly something honestly,
it's a cycle right Because themore you laugh the more the the
cortisol in your your body, yourstress hormone is going to be
suppressed, the the more yourdopamine and your serotonin, the
(24:16):
feel good hormones, are goingto increase, and and so the more
you do it, the more you'regoing to want to do it.
The more you do it, the moreyou're going to want to do it.
The more you do it, the moreyou're going to want right, you
see how there's a cycle.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
You know, good or bad , it's a cycle right and and I
go.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
So when it comes to your marriage, you know it ain't
always easy.
No, but I'll tell you right now.
There have been plenty of timeswhere me and debbie are in like
a heated discussion, also knownas a argument.
Sure, she says something ordoes something, and you just
(24:49):
bust out laughing to laugh.
And I'm not talking about thatweird, oh slain in the spirit
laughing thing no, like laughingat me, I'm not talking about
that.
I'm sitting here going like shemakes a face or she said she
messes up on a word or somethinglike that and immediately just
starts laughing.
I'm just laughing and, and Iknow, nine times out of ten at
(25:11):
that point, that argument, thatheated discussion, that, however
you word it, it does take aturn.
Yeah, one out of ten times it's, it's gonna take a turn for the
worse and you know the otherperson's gonna be like you, son
of a yep, how dare you laugh atme kind of thing, but even which
has happened before, and eventhat I'm gonna be like, yeah,
(25:32):
but here's why, right, it wasfunny.
And then normally that that'sfollowed within another sentence
or two.
It's normally something alongthe lines of this is stupid.
Speaker 2 (25:41):
What are we even doing here?
Yep why?
Speaker 1 (25:45):
because I broke that cycle and that tension and, and
I broke that, oh, I have to beright, or or whatever the case
may be, and it it's turned into,is this really worth it?
Right is this worth the 15, 20,30 minutes an hour?
(26:05):
Whatever is this worth?
You know the the feelings.
Do you have hills to die on?
Sure, so do I, but at the endof the day, everything's not a
hill to die on right, and I goand and so a lot of us.
we just force ourselves to becompletely miserable because
everything's become a hill todie on and everything is serious
(26:26):
and everything and it's like,but it's not.
Speaker 2 (26:29):
It's not right.
Speaker 1 (26:30):
At the end of the day , it's not.
Speaker 2 (26:33):
There are hills to die on sure.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Yeah, but I go.
The reason why, going back toMatthew 6, jesus can sit here
and say do not be anxious.
In Matthew 6, jesus can sithere and say do not be anxious,
it's because, at the end of theday, do I trust that he holds
everything in his hand, thathe's in complete control of all
of this Right, because if I do,that gives me the opportunity
(26:57):
now to just kind of sit back andrelax and laugh Because, like
the Bible says, he came to steal, kill and destroy.
The thief.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
The thief came to steal, kill and thief.
The thief came to steal, killand destroy.
You know.
Steal your joy, destroy yourmarriage.
Yeah, you know.
Kill your hopes and dreams.
It's not just people.
I know that verse used to beused out of context.
He's gonna murder you, he'sgonna end your life, which might
happen, but that's, that's notwhat.
That's not what we're talkingabout here.
It's if he can just keep youstirred up enough to keep you
(27:23):
busy, miserable, you're going todestroy your relationship and
you're also not going to be ableto be a witness for the gospel.
You're not gonna be able to bea witness for the gospel.
You know.
You're not going to be able toshare.
You know how God has used yourlife and you know point people
(27:45):
to jesus exactly.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
If you're always talking about your problem,
you're not talking about jesuswell and, like I said, at a
certain point you have to justlaugh.
Yeah, you have to like.
At a certain point you have torealize you only got a certain
number of these.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
Even in dealing in situations with our kids or or
kids.
You know your kids in general.
Whatever a situation happensafter the third time you're like
, okay, it was a joke, right,like we're doing this again.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
Well, I go like think about it.
Speaker 2 (28:17):
Psalm 139, right Before me were each of my days
that you have numbered right.
You have you only have acertain number of heartbeats you
only have a certain number ofbreaths and days and yep and,
and I don't know what thatnumber is no you know, it could
be a hundred thousand mygrandmother was 98 when she died
.
What is that?
Speaker 1 (28:42):
I have no idea do you hear that?
I do I.
I don't know if they'll hear.
It sounds like somethingoutside I think it is outside
but anyway sorry there was music.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
We were like what in the world is that?
Speaker 1 (28:59):
but anyway, like you, you do you only have a certain
number of days.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
And you don't want to spend them miserable and,
honestly, you don't want yourlegacy for people.
You're gone and people go, youknow.
Yeah, I mean they were here,but man, they were miserable all
the time.
There are people now that youknow you have to take a deep
breath before you have aconversation with, Because
you're like, okay, okay, here wego.
(29:24):
I know it's gonna be badthey're gonna be angry.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
There are phone calls .
I get where I go.
Speaker 2 (29:28):
I gotta go outside yes, or you look at the phone
and go I gotta call back.
I can't, I don't have it in meright now to have this
conversation, not because of anyother reason.
Where you go, they're literallyjust it's gonna the entire time
is just gonna be miserable.
Are you that person that callspeople and they're like, oh god
but I want to keep it in contextof the family at least your
(29:50):
spouse.
Your spouse calls you and you go.
I know it's gonna be somethingnegative, and that's where I go
don't be that person fart andbet, like tonight, like tonight.
Go out of your way, like youwere listening to this.
They're going to be people thathave accidents, you know what?
Because they're like I'm tryingso hard.
I'm just sitting here sayingbut you got to tell Josh, if you
(30:11):
do, because honestly he loves agood, good fart story.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
A funny one.
No, I don't like the disgustingstuff Like a funny fart story.
Speaker 2 (30:26):
Like when someone goes.
Can you bring me a change of?
Speaker 1 (30:28):
clothes.
That's a good one.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
That's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Oops.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
Josh, I tried so hard to toot in bed, but that's what
I mean.
Speaker 1 (30:37):
I mean, I don't.
Speaker 2 (30:38):
More than I bargained for.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
Jesus says I came so that you may have life, and have
life abundantly.
Speaker 2 (30:42):
Right, enjoy it, bargain for it.
Jesus says I came so that youmay have life, and have life
abundantly right.
Enjoy, not miserably like enjoyit, you're gonna have troubles.
The bible says you will havetroubles but jesus redeemed
creation.
When he said it is finished, hemeant it yes, and I go like
watch a funny show together withyour spouse, something that you
both enjoy, that you both canlaugh at.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
That's what she said.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
Hey.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
Like you.
I'm just saying like you know.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Have inside jokes with each other.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
So tonight.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
Tickle until you fart .
Speaker 1 (31:14):
It was a loud car that just.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
What on earth is happening out there?
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (31:18):
It's like we live Not live because we're at work, but
are we in a war zone like what?
Is this it?
Speaker 2 (31:26):
was terrible but anyway.
Speaker 1 (31:29):
So as we wrap it up, that's it.
Man just laugh yeah if you'resitting here going, I'm not
funny fart you'll be funny, andif you're, like my spouse,
because I do know there are alot of people that like just
can't stand that, do it and justgo.
Speaker 2 (31:51):
Crap happens like and then walk away.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
We're doing at the grocery store but laugh, enjoy
and, and you know, get to knoweach other on a different level
and and there are people thatare going through stressful
times right now and that willhelp.
Speaker 2 (32:05):
It sucks.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
Yes, I'm not making light of your situation.
No, I'm giving you a way tohelp cope with your situation
Right, trust in Jesus and laugh,so until we talk again in our
how-to.
If you have something thatyou're sitting here going like,
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (32:21):
I struggle with this, or what about that or how do I
do this?
Speaker 1 (32:25):
like you can always hit us up on social media.
You can always email info atmissioncentorg.
You can always hit us up on theworld wide web at
missioncentorg but, until nexttime.
We thank you.
Please make sure you share theepisode.
We love you and we can't waitto talk with you again all right
.
Alright, on this episode of Faith, family and
Fishing, we are headed to aplace that I don't think many
family podcasts get to.
So let me ask you this do youfart in bed?
So this episode I'm not goingto lie, lie could be a little
(00:33):
embarrassing.
Actually.
For you it's gonna be a lotembarrassing for me.
For me, it's not asembarrassing nothing embarrasses
you not just that, it's socialstigma, right.
So we're in this how-to series.
We're looking at how tostrengthen marriages, how to
strengthen families, how to getback to what God designed this
for, because God designed familywith a very specific task of
(00:55):
handling all of the differentemotional support and just being
the first place where you'rediscipled.
So in this how-to like lastweek, we looked at how-to anger,
right.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Okay, well, not last week, two weeks ago.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Our last episode.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
This one Mm-hmm.
Okay, I'm not going to justshoot out with what it is,
because I think the best way todo this is you like to build
anticipation?
It's not just buildinganticipation.
You got to put it in context,like everything is in context
right, like when, even if welook at like biblical study,
exegesis versus eisegesis.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Right.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
When we're, we're putting ourself into context or
we're trying to, you know, pullout the context of a scriptural
text.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Where exegesis is.
You're reading it exactly howit was written.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
You're extracting no, no you're, you're pulling out
of what was in there ineisegesis.
You're putting yourself yourselfin your david your problems are
goliath right as matt chamlerfamously said, that is not the
case, so I need to put this intocontext before we get into the
how-to.
Here's the deal when peoplelook at us, like people look at
(02:05):
me and you, all right, and youcan go on social media and see a
picture of me and debbie allday long uh, youtube, like it is
all over the place.
If there was a strange smell,oh god.
Like, let's say, hypotheticallyspeaking, we're at lowe's, okay
(02:26):
, and it's me, you and the kids,we're at the cash register, and
all of the sudden, it's justyou and the cashier in this like
strange thick smell and you'renowhere to be found.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
You've left it there for me to be embarrassed and to
be looked at like what is wrongwith this one, but automatically
.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
What is everyone going to think?
Speaker 2 (02:49):
right, god, did she just pass gas?
Speaker 1 (02:51):
no, they're not even gonna think, did she.
They're gonna look at me and go.
He farted and walked away rightwell, because you're laughing
as you walk away but regardless,even if I wasn't, even if I'm
just like stone-faced, they'restill gonna look at and go.
He farted and walked away,right, I think that.
I think that is an unfairassessment.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
How is that unfair.
It's accurate.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
Here's why In our household, okay.
The title of the episode is isdo you fart in bed?
Oh okay, so gosh.
So in our house, serious in ourhousehold, oh my jesus, people
(03:37):
would look at me and go he's thestinky one right like what did
I just exegete from what youjust said?
I'm just saying like in societyin general, men are looked at
like you're the stinky,unhygienic ones, and women are
looked at like you're the clean.
Like never, far like never,like none of that.
(03:59):
And I'm just saying that thatmay or may not be true in our
household.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Okay, saying that that may or may not be true in
our household.
Okay, I want you to think veryabout what you're saying and how
you're saying it.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
We have been married for 20 plus years so far I'm not
saying that you are in any waydirty and not hygienic.
You were probably air on thethe side of overly clean.
What I'm saying is, sometimesthat smell isn't me, is what I'm
(04:35):
getting at see people don'trealize very natural.
Not in that way, not in thatway.
What?
Speaker 2 (04:45):
is wrong with you.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
You eat a lot of like fresh, good food, like produce
and vegetables, and all of thatand a natural process of all of
that is is going to break downinto gas, right?
No one ever looks at a woman,though, and goes she farts.
Why are you staring at me?
(05:10):
It should not shock anyonelistening to this podcast that
you have gas.
If you are listening to thispodcast, you fart oh my god.
Is that not true?
Speaker 2 (05:26):
it's like our first episode the whole.
Do you pray when you poop?
Speaker 1 (05:29):
is it true that everyone farts?
Yes, you die okay, if youdidn't thank you, because it
build up of gas.
Gas will bust an iron pipe.
It sure will pressure now.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Now, why I bring this up is because title is I want
you to know the way you prefacedit made it sound like I'm
walking around, like I stink nonot at all, not at all.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
That is not at all how I was trying to mean
anything or anything like that.
What I'm saying, though becausethe title of the episode is Do
you Fart in Bed, or somethingalong those lines, because I'm
going to let AI pick the title,but it definitely deals with a
lot of Gas.
So you need all of thatbackground information that we
(06:11):
just discussed.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
In order to understand.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Where we're going, what this episode actually is.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
Because that's what this episode was actually built
out of.
Because if you look at mostpeople, most people treat life
like like a business.
I guess is the easiest way tosay it.
They treat what like that lifeokay like in your marriage is no
different.
You have your roles, I have myroles.
As long as everybody's meetingtheir roles, everything's all
(06:37):
good right right so in fightingshadows, one of the things.
Fighting shadows yes, in thebook fighting shadows, um, one
of the things that not just mereading, okay it's, it's the men
of the church, um, one of thethings that they, they were
talking about last week.
We, we looked at futility,right and, and just it gets very
(06:57):
easy, um, to look at life andgo what's what's the point, Like
you know, and it kind of playsinto the apathy thing that we're
going into right now, but oneof the things to battle futility
is to play, okay, and and I'mgonna say this, I get to use the
(07:18):
word caveat again.
With this caveat, I love thatword you should not be 30 years
old still playing video games,and that is your life.
Okay, okay so when I use theword play.
That's not what I'm talkingabout Right, right, right.
I'm not saying that you shouldnever if that's who you are like
play video games.
I don't.
I fish, you know I get outside,hence the fishing episode.
(07:41):
Like I mean, that's what I'mgoing to spend my spare time
doing.
Now, what that word play meansis sometimes you have to
disconnect from life and you gotto live somewhere else in this
world, right?
Speaker 2 (07:57):
OK.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
So, like last night, we took an hour, hour and a half
, something like that Drove outto the beach, did some fishing,
got some tournament entries,stopped and had some tacos on
the way home.
Got home, took showers, went tobed.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Right.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
For those, and I think you know it wasn't just an
hour and a half- we werefishing for an hour and a half
at the beach.
We were out for about three,three and a half four hours.
Speaker 2 (08:21):
Kids got to swim, they got to see the you know
they got to swim with seaturtles.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
You know I got to catch some fish.
You know me and you got to justhang out, that is play.
Too many of us do not play inour marriage.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
Right.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
Everything is just like.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Serious and business.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
You have your things, I have my things, I sit here
and go, do you fart in?
Speaker 2 (08:46):
bed, because if you answer no, you're boring, well
you, this bores me not just thatyes, you are boring, though but
more importantly, why?
Speaker 1 (09:02):
why don't you?
Are you still trying to put afacade on?
Because, like I remember, likewhen we first started dating, I
wouldn't even use the bathroomat your parents' house?
That is true, I would leavethat If I had to go, and I'm
pretty good at holding it.
But if I had to go, I got torun up to the store real quick.
I got to get out of here.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
That's the facade you're putting up right, Because
you facade you're putting upright because you don't want
anyone to look at you a certainkind of way, you don't want to
leave the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
Oh my god, you don't want to get enough of that you
don't want to leave the bathroomin that kind of shape right or
smell, and then you know peoplelook at you like did you do that
?
Got some gi issues going on,huh.
So we put this facade on.
(09:48):
But a lot of us carry thatfacade throughout our whole
marriage too that's true and andwe never get to the point where
we're just free yeah, we neverget to the point where there's
any kind of playing, wherethere's inside jokes and there's
laughing and and all of thisand and that is like incredibly
detrimental to your marriage Ifthere is no fun in your marriage
(10:11):
.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Right.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
It's like a business relationship, it's a job.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Right, like you're with a coworker.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Right, you got a roommate.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Right.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Hey, you guys sleep in the same bed.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Right, maybe you pay bills together, maybe, maybe,
and that's a that.
Hey, you guys sleep in the samebed, right?
Speaker 1 (10:25):
you pay bills together, maybe, maybe and even
and and that's a differentpodcast paying bills together
because I go.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
We had the same bank account from when we were still
dating, um, not that long either, and I'm not saying I recommend
that for everybody.
I mean it worked.
Or did you get with me for my?
Speaker 1 (10:40):
millions?
I did not.
I mean it worked for us.
Nor did you get with me for mymillions.
I did not.
The joke would have been on you.
But I go something like thisand hopefully you guys I mean
that laughing during the introof this that's real laughs,
right, because farts they'refunny.
(11:01):
I mean, no matter what thesituation is, Josh is cracking
up A well-placed fart willdiffuse any situation, like I
could be like yelling at thekids, like just irate blood
boiling mad, and if one of themjust like it, just you're
(11:22):
immediately laughing.
And what happens when you laugh?
Speaker 2 (11:24):
well, your serotonin goes up, your dopamine goes up,
your cortisol goes down.
You literally have aphysiological reaction in your
body that starts decompressingyou from the inside out.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Voltaire.
Okay, just because you keptlooking, yeah and focus on the
family.
That had this great write-upabout bringing humor into your
marriage.
Right and seriously.
You know, since 2020 ish, Idon't know why it just seems
like there's nothing funnyanymore, like like life is just
(11:57):
serious and that's it.
Don't play with anything.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Right.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
But it it starts with this the more you laugh
together, the more you love yourspouse.
And and I go, I agree with that.
Right, like you are my bestfriend, why would we not have
jokes?
Why would we not play aroundwith each other?
Why would we not make eachother laugh?
Some of the best dates we'veever been on have been in our
(12:22):
room.
You know, just laughing, justtalking and laughing and joking,
maybe watching, you know, afunny movie or something on
something funny that happenedfarting right in the bed I mean
I I will never pass up thatopportunity that is true like if
, if I can, I'm dutch oveningall day like just throwing them
(12:44):
blankets over Debbie's head andlet's let it go and not even
saying a word.
Well, I think, if you say it,though, it ruins the joke.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
It does ruin the joke .
Speaker 1 (12:52):
The ambiance is you can't bask in the ambiance, then
you know.
But it also says the mostwasted of all days is one
without laughter.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Yes, I agree with that, and I go.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
There's just so much that laughter brings to any
relationship you have.
We're going to lookspecifically at your marriage,
but any relationship, um, andwhat I was going to say is
voltaire said that, um, and yougot to give me a second to find
(13:26):
it.
I'm not the quickest reader.
The art of medicine consists ofamusing the patient while
nature cures the disease.
And it's funny because modernresearch indicates that people
with a sense of humor have fewersymptoms of physical illness
than those who are less humorous.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
That's interesting.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
The Bible even tells us a cheerful heart is good
medicine.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
Yeah, that's true.
I love a good laugh too, andyou know that I love seeing
people laugh.
I like hearing kids laugh.
I love, love laughter.
Speaker 1 (14:01):
But everywhere you look, right Everywhere, whether
it's psychology, whether it'shistory, whether it's biblically
, everywhere you look there'slaughter, there's joy, there's
all of these things, becauseit's impossible to be mad and
laughing at the same time.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Right, right right.
Unless you're Joker Well thenthat's a whole different.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
But even then, I don think the joker's like mad.
I just think he's chaos, like Ijust think he's chaotic okay
you know, I don't think he'slike angry.
I don't think he's sitting here,you know, going.
I have this vendetta.
I just think he's sitting here,going.
I want to burn it all down.
Right, of course you wouldlaugh and I go, but it's the
(14:44):
same thing, right?
Everyone's heard from the timeyou were little laughter is the
best medicine.
That's why I think about itlike something traumatic happens
in our life and and I'll be thefirst one to admit there have
been times I I err more on thetimes of that was an
inappropriate time to make ajoke.
You know, you, you get terriblenews or something of that we
(15:07):
had to put our dog down yepright and I don't know.
It's been a couple of weeks itwas not a couple of weeks, it
might have been a couple ofweeks a week, and you know,
we're driving home from work andI'm like, hey, when we get home
, don't forget, let the dog out.
Yep, you know, and for the kids, like they're like a state of
shock at well no, because ittook them a minute first to
(15:29):
realize oh there, we can't lethim out, he's right, he's gone,
and then it's like daddy, andthen you know the laughing comes
in why?
because laughter helps you copewith that right.
Laughter helps you get throughthose very stressful, very like
like I've been accused of nottaking things serious enough and
(15:51):
and and I think there is a lineon that side, right, I think
time and place, right, you knowyou should know.
Okay, now is not the time orthe place to to drop that.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Right.
Um whether it's passing gas orno there's never.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
There's never, not a time for that, but when,
honestly, like if you sit downand you think of your
relationship with your spouse,when was the last time you guys
just sat down and laughed rightlike when was the last time you
just went like hey, like I heardthis knock, knock who's there?
Oh, I don't actually have one,but when was the last time you,
you know, I heard this joke.
I heard, you know.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
Whatever the case may be, send each other funny memes
, funny little shorts or becausewhat if one of you isn't on
social media?
Speaker 1 (16:39):
right and then you just get funny memes sent to you
.
That's true.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
I do sometimes send them to JT to show you if you
guys are together, because Iknow you won't go on there.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
But I go think about it.
It is very, very hard to remainangry at someone.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
If you're laughing.
Speaker 1 (17:02):
Jay Leno said that.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Right, and you're not saying every situation needs to
be just thrown under the rugbecause there's laughter.
But if you're in a relationshipand you I mean you're with your
spouse and laugh with your kidstoo, have jokes with them pull
the mic a little right here.
There you go laugh with yourkids.
You know, everything doesn'thave to be so serious and stern,
(17:25):
and I've had to learn that overthe years that I can laugh at
stuff.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
I can laugh at myself so there's a movie that came
back out in the early maybe late90s, early 2000s, somewhere
there and the main character andand you know what, if you're
gonna google who said this andand you're gonna find the movie
that way, I mean more power toyou.
Um, I'm not going to say thename of the movie because I
don't want to seem like I'mendorsing it, because it's not a
(17:50):
movie you should sit down andwatch.
It's not a terrible movie.
It was Van Wilder.
Okay, let's just go through it,I said it anyway.
Definitely slapstick humor verylow-hanging fruit jokes, but he
does.
Ryan Reynolds has a line inthat in which he says don't
worry too much about life,You'll never make it out alive.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
And that's true.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
And maybe someone said that line before him, but
that's where I know it from andI go.
That's the problem.
It's true.
Think about the things that wehave stressed about throughout
our life.
And I mean and there's been aton of them.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
Um, you know, if we go back, you know 2008 to 2012
rough like I was seriously, Iwas hoping that the Mayan
calendar was correct and thatthe world was going to end in
2012.
Speaker 2 (18:44):
Because I was.
I was like.
You know.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
I'm done with this Like this sucks.
It was exhausting, um, we bothlost our jobs.
I mean, we were homeless for aminute, like you know literally
lost.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
When we say lost everything, not like, oh, we
only had a few hundred dollarsin the account, we literally had
zero right and and if it wasn'tnegative and if it wasn't for a
family, um, I don't know howthat they would have looked
completely different than whatit did.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Um, you know, and, and you know, by God's grace,
you know, we came through theother side, but, like I remember
, during even those times whereit was like man, you didn't even
want to put one foot in frontof the other because you'd lost
any sense of hope any sense ofjoy, any sense of and, and you
know, like I said, I was lookingat this going.
Hey, they said december 21st2012 is the end of the world.
Like, bring it, bring it.
Like let's go and I go.
How do you get at that point?
You stop laughing yep, becauseyou go this is life-changing and
(19:37):
therefore cannot be humorous inany way, shape or form.
And on the other side of that,I mean, here we are 13 years
later, on the other side of that, looking back, we can look at
it and go man, how much time didwe waste not enjoying moments,
(20:00):
the moments that God had givenus to begin with.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
And we can look back now at situations and kind of
giggle at them.
You know laughing at literallyselling shoes so we can go to
the gas station and get the kidsslurpees.
You know going to certainstores to sell some whatever we
had, having garage sales thatpeople stole from just walking
around Lowe's and making mentallist of hey you know, maybe one
(20:23):
day we can get this van.
Maybe one day we can, you know,laughing with the kids when you
would, you know, tell theirlittle stories underneath the
blanket and they're you knowgiggling and laughing making
forts.
You know, thankfully God wasgracious in you know putting us
together Because I had a reallyhard time and you always kept,
(20:45):
especially at the end of the day, when I was just done.
You always kept that going,especially for the kids where
they had that opportunity tojust giggle and laugh when I was
completely done.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
I'm not saying that there's never a time to take
yourself seriously.
I'm not saying that there'snever a time to you know, put
aside jokes and stuff.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Sure, yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
I am saying that those times should be further.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
And few between.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Than most of us take it Right.
Most of us, I mean, we stressabout everything.
Speaker 2 (21:19):
Everything.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Matthew 6.
That's what Jesus is talkingabout, right?
Why be be anxious for tomorrow?
Tomorrow has its own worries,yep, and, and that's what it is
like it's sitting here puttinginto perspective, right.
Humor helps us cope, humorhelps us de-stress, humor helps
us to be able to disconnect fromreality and and in and in doing
(21:40):
so, it allows us theopportunity now to look at it
and go okay, hold on, let me seethis for what it really is is
this something that is reallylife-altering?
Speaker 2 (21:54):
and does it need to consume every waking moment
right?
Speaker 1 (21:56):
because, honestly, if the devil can get you to sit
there and just fixate onsomething, and get you to sit
here and go, well, what aboutthis?
Speaker 2 (22:05):
What about that?
Speaker 1 (22:06):
Seriously.
If the devil can steal your joy, he will if you let him and
then you're going to be amiserable human being that
nobody wants to be around.
And you don't want to be aroundanyone.
Speaker 2 (22:17):
And I, uh, I read this thing and said if you know,
the devil knows he can't haveyou because you already belong
to God, but if he can keep youdistracted, he will.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:26):
And so, no, you know, no one can take my children
from me, but, you know, keepthem distracted.
That's the same thing the devildoes to us.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
But even if we look at like Philippians, 4.13, right
, one of the most famous versesin the Bible.
Thanks, Tim Tebow, you know youknow, I can do all things
through christ, who gives mestrength, but if you back up
before that, and read why he'spaul, sitting here and going hey
, I have found the secret ofbeing content.
I know what it's like to have alittle.
I know what it's like to have alot.
I know what it's like to starve.
(22:53):
I know what it's like to feastright, but I'm convinced of this
, that I can do all thingsthrough christ, who gives me
strength?
Right, it's sitting here goinghey, like at the end of the day
I mean, and again with paul, yougot to look at him and go, hey,
he has this mentality ofsitting here going.
You know what are you gonna doto me?
Philippians, one right, threechapters before this.
He sits here and goes for me tolive as christ, to die as gain.
(23:16):
There's nothing you can do tosomeone like that right like oh
okay, you know I'm gonna put youin jail, cool right because I'm
gonna preach to people in jailpreach the walls off literally,
I have a prison ministry, allright, well, we're gonna, you
know behead you.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Well, the world's gonna know that I died for jesus
you know, and, and so I go it.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
But we get stuck in these rap, uh, not routes ruts
our lives and like the happinessis just gone, and that's not.
The joy is just gone, thesmiles are just gone.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
Things aren't going to go wrong and things aren't
going wrong, but no, they will.
But they're, but they're wronganyway.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
So why not take some time to enjoy some laughs and
giggles and, you know, watchfunny videos, talk about funny
things that happened, you know,and honestly something honestly,
it's a cycle right Because themore you laugh the more the the
cortisol in your your body, yourstress hormone is going to be
suppressed, the the more yourdopamine and your serotonin, the
(24:16):
feel good hormones, are goingto increase, and and so the more
you do it, the more you'regoing to want to do it.
The more you do it, the moreyou're going to want to do it.
The more you do it, the moreyou're going to want right, you
see how there's a cycle.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
You know, good or bad , it's a cycle right and and I
go.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
So when it comes to your marriage, you know it ain't
always easy.
No, but I'll tell you right now.
There have been plenty of timeswhere me and debbie are in like
a heated discussion, also knownas a argument.
Sure, she says something ordoes something, and you just
(24:49):
bust out laughing to laugh.
And I'm not talking about thatweird, oh slain in the spirit
laughing thing no, like laughingat me, I'm not talking about
that.
I'm sitting here going like shemakes a face or she said she
messes up on a word or somethinglike that and immediately just
starts laughing.
I'm just laughing and, and Iknow, nine times out of ten at
(25:11):
that point, that argument, thatheated discussion, that, however
you word it, it does take aturn.
Yeah, one out of ten times it's, it's gonna take a turn for the
worse and you know the otherperson's gonna be like you, son
of a yep, how dare you laugh atme kind of thing, but even which
has happened before, and eventhat I'm gonna be like, yeah,
(25:32):
but here's why, right, it wasfunny.
And then normally that that'sfollowed within another sentence
or two.
It's normally something alongthe lines of this is stupid.
Speaker 2 (25:41):
What are we even doing here?
Yep why?
Speaker 1 (25:45):
because I broke that cycle and that tension and, and
I broke that, oh, I have to beright, or or whatever the case
may be, and it it's turned into,is this really worth it?
Right is this worth the 15, 20,30 minutes an hour?
(26:05):
Whatever is this worth?
You know the the feelings.
Do you have hills to die on?
Sure, so do I, but at the endof the day, everything's not a
hill to die on right, and I goand and so a lot of us.
we just force ourselves to becompletely miserable because
everything's become a hill todie on and everything is serious
(26:26):
and everything and it's like,but it's not.
Speaker 2 (26:29):
It's not right.
Speaker 1 (26:30):
At the end of the day , it's not.
Speaker 2 (26:33):
There are hills to die on sure.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Yeah, but I go.
The reason why, going back toMatthew 6, jesus can sit here
and say do not be anxious.
In Matthew 6, jesus can sithere and say do not be anxious,
it's because, at the end of theday, do I trust that he holds
everything in his hand, thathe's in complete control of all
of this Right, because if I do,that gives me the opportunity
(26:57):
now to just kind of sit back andrelax and laugh Because, like
the Bible says, he came to steal, kill and destroy.
The thief.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
The thief came to steal, kill and thief.
The thief came to steal, killand destroy.
You know.
Steal your joy, destroy yourmarriage.
Yeah, you know.
Kill your hopes and dreams.
It's not just people.
I know that verse used to beused out of context.
He's gonna murder you, he'sgonna end your life, which might
happen, but that's, that's notwhat.
That's not what we're talkingabout here.
It's if he can just keep youstirred up enough to keep you
(27:23):
busy, miserable, you're going todestroy your relationship and
you're also not going to be ableto be a witness for the gospel.
You're not gonna be able to bea witness for the gospel.
You know.
You're not going to be able toshare.
You know how God has used yourlife and you know point people
(27:45):
to jesus exactly.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
If you're always talking about your problem,
you're not talking about jesuswell and, like I said, at a
certain point you have to justlaugh.
Yeah, you have to like.
At a certain point you have torealize you only got a certain
number of these.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
Even in dealing in situations with our kids or or
kids.
You know your kids in general.
Whatever a situation happensafter the third time you're like
, okay, it was a joke, right,like we're doing this again.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
Well, I go like think about it.
Speaker 2 (28:17):
Psalm 139, right Before me were each of my days
that you have numbered right.
You have you only have acertain number of heartbeats you
only have a certain number ofbreaths and days and yep and,
and I don't know what thatnumber is no you know, it could
be a hundred thousand mygrandmother was 98 when she died
.
What is that?
Speaker 1 (28:42):
I have no idea do you hear that?
I do I.
I don't know if they'll hear.
It sounds like somethingoutside I think it is outside
but anyway sorry there was music.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
We were like what in the world is that?
Speaker 1 (28:59):
but anyway, like you, you do you only have a certain
number of days.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
And you don't want to spend them miserable and,
honestly, you don't want yourlegacy for people.
You're gone and people go, youknow.
Yeah, I mean they were here,but man, they were miserable all
the time.
There are people now that youknow you have to take a deep
breath before you have aconversation with, Because
you're like, okay, okay, here wego.
(29:24):
I know it's gonna be badthey're gonna be angry.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
There are phone calls .
I get where I go.
Speaker 2 (29:28):
I gotta go outside yes, or you look at the phone
and go I gotta call back.
I can't, I don't have it in meright now to have this
conversation, not because of anyother reason.
Where you go, they're literallyjust it's gonna the entire time
is just gonna be miserable.
Are you that person that callspeople and they're like, oh god
but I want to keep it in contextof the family at least your
(29:50):
spouse.
Your spouse calls you and you go.
I know it's gonna be somethingnegative, and that's where I go
don't be that person fart andbet, like tonight, like tonight.
Go out of your way, like youwere listening to this.
They're going to be people thathave accidents, you know what?
Because they're like I'm tryingso hard.
I'm just sitting here sayingbut you got to tell Josh, if you
(30:11):
do, because honestly he loves agood, good fart story.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
A funny one.
No, I don't like the disgustingstuff Like a funny fart story.
Speaker 2 (30:26):
Like when someone goes.
Can you bring me a change of?
Speaker 1 (30:28):
clothes.
That's a good one.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
That's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Oops.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
Josh, I tried so hard to toot in bed, but that's what
I mean.
Speaker 1 (30:37):
I mean, I don't.
Speaker 2 (30:38):
More than I bargained for.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
Jesus says I came so that you may have life, and have
life abundantly.
Speaker 2 (30:42):
Right, enjoy it, bargain for it.
Jesus says I came so that youmay have life, and have life
abundantly right.
Enjoy, not miserably like enjoyit, you're gonna have troubles.
The bible says you will havetroubles but jesus redeemed
creation.
When he said it is finished, hemeant it yes, and I go like
watch a funny show together withyour spouse, something that you
both enjoy, that you both canlaugh at.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
That's what she said.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
Hey.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
Like you.
I'm just saying like you know.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Have inside jokes with each other.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
So tonight.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
Tickle until you fart .
Speaker 1 (31:14):
It was a loud car that just.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
What on earth is happening out there?
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (31:18):
It's like we live Not live because we're at work, but
are we in a war zone like what?
Is this it?
Speaker 2 (31:26):
was terrible but anyway.
Speaker 1 (31:29):
So as we wrap it up, that's it.
Man just laugh yeah if you'resitting here going, I'm not
funny fart you'll be funny, andif you're, like my spouse,
because I do know there are alot of people that like just
can't stand that, do it and justgo.
Speaker 2 (31:51):
Crap happens like and then walk away.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
We're doing at the grocery store but laugh, enjoy
and, and you know, get to knoweach other on a different level
and and there are people thatare going through stressful
times right now and that willhelp.
Speaker 2 (32:05):
It sucks.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
Yes, I'm not making light of your situation.
No, I'm giving you a way tohelp cope with your situation
Right, trust in Jesus and laugh,so until we talk again in our
how-to.
If you have something thatyou're sitting here going like,
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (32:21):
I struggle with this, or what about that or how do I
do this?
Speaker 1 (32:25):
like you can always hit us up on social media.
You can always email info atmissioncentorg.
You can always hit us up on theworld wide web at
missioncentorg but, until nexttime.
We thank you.
Please make sure you share theepisode.
We love you and we can't waitto talk with you again all right
.
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