The Red Temperament with Kathleen Edelman and Traci Shepherd

“The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out.” - Proverbs 20:5

Today, we’re kicking off a new series on temperaments, how our God-given wiring shapes the way we communicate, relate to others, and make financial decisions. Kathleen Edelman and Traci Shepherd join us to explore the Red temperament and how it influences our financial decisions.

Kathleen Edelman is the author of I Said This, You Heard That: How Your Wiring Colors Your Communication. She is certified in Biblical Studies and Christian Counseling Psychology and has spent over 30 years coaching clients in the art of effective communication.

Traci Shepherd is our Red Temperament representative for this episode. 

What Are the Four Temperaments?

For those who are new to the concept of the four temperaments, here is a helpful summary:

• Yellow (Sanguine): Speaks the language of people and fun – an extroverted, people-oriented personality.
• Red (Choleric): Speaks the language of power and control – an extroverted, task-oriented personality.
• Blue (Melancholic): Speaks the language of perfection and order – an introverted, task-oriented personality.
• Green (Phlegmatic): Speaks the language of calm and harmony – an introverted, people-oriented personality.

Each temperament influences how we speak, listen, behave, and manage our finances.

The Red Temperament: Driven and Decisive

Reds are typically goal-oriented, confident, and solution-focused. They don’t just talk about getting things done; they make it happen. In relationships, this drive often leads them to step in and take over when others hesitate. But that same strength can become a weakness if it turns into controlling behavior rather than collaborative leadership.

The Red temperament often feels the need to fix things. This framework helps them see the strength behind that impulse and offers tools to balance their drive with empathy.

Red Temperament and Money: It's All About the Plan

Reds tend to view money as a means to accomplish their goals. They prefer clarity, efficiency, and structure. But they may clash with other temperaments—for instance, a Yellow, who values fun, spontaneity, and experiences.

Rather than labeling other spending styles as wrong, having this awareness can enable more honest conversations, especially in relational tensions within areas like finances. 

Strength with Compassion: Communication Tips for Reds

Reds bring immense value to financial decision-making. Their clarity of vision and drive for results help families and teams move forward. Reds are bullet-point, bottom-line thinkers, but that doesn’t mean they’ve ignored the details. They’re often 10 steps ahead.

To foster healthier communication, Kathleen encourages Reds to:

• Pause before responding
• Ask questions with curiosity (“What do you think?” or “How do you feel about this?”)
• Listen to understand, not just to reply

These simple shifts can transform conflict into connection.

The Emotional Needs of a Red

Reds have core emotional needs that must be honored, especially in financial conversations:

1. Loyalty—Knowing others have their back.
2. Sense of Control—Either having control or trusting someone else is in control.
3. Appreciation—Being valued for their strengths.
4. Credit for Work—Recognition for their contributions.

When these needs go unmet, Reds can respond with frustration or harshness. However, when those needs are met, they become dynamic and inspiring leaders.

What to Remember if You or Someone You Love is a Red