Give It 5

"Within these Santa films were bound the strength and will to bring holiday cheer around the world. But they were, all of them, deceived, for another Santa film was made..."

We enjoyed (is that the right word?) our holiday-themed commentary for One Magic Christmas (you know...the one were the dad gets shot. in. the. face.) so much we decided to do another one!

2020 was a weird year, and it produced an ev...

One Shall Stand. Three Shall Fall.

It's the thrilling conclusion to our Chris Kringle King of the Ring! To recap, all four of us are going head-to-head-to-head-to-head, each having chosen what we each deem to be the ultimate Santa Claus film depiction. This week we cover our final two challengers and determine the ultimate Claus.

Miracle on 34th Street (1994) - Peter York
Elf (2003) - Connor Lynch

Four Santas enter. Only one leaves.

Ho Ho H'oh no! 

Happy Holidays everyone. The boys at Fix-a-Flick are once again back on to talk about what the Christmas season is all about: competition. All four of us are going head-to-head-to-head-to-head in a sleigh bell smackdown, each having chosen what we each deem to be the ultimate Santa Claus film depiction. Because of the size of this yule tidal wave, this epis...

"Do you expect me to talk?"

Spooky Season is over, pumpkin spice has completely permeated the air, and the Holidays are just around the corner. You know what that means; it's time to give thanks to our favorite British spy. The name's Bond. James Bond.

This year we each highlighted a personal favorite that might not be well remembered. Frank went dove deep to nominate Thunderball while Tomorrow...

FULL. SCREAM. AHEAD.

The crescendo of this year's Halloween mini-series - Deep Rising, where a crew of mercenaries planning to hijack a cruise ship shows up to realize something got to the ship first: a gargantuan tentacled...thing? Idk, it's not a squid and it's not an octopus. Whatever, it drinks people and that's all you need to know. Hop aboard to watch store-brand Harrison Ford and a crew of murder...

" What heads we were able to salvage from the Santos Morales were pretty decomposed, but they all were missing their hypothalamus... es."

Let's talk about the kathoga in the room. For the first half of our NO FLICKS GIVEN series with Fix-a-Flick hosts Connor & Peter, Frank decided to punish us. Is it a murder mystery? A monster slasher? If 78% of the frame weren't too dark to see, we might have been...

The one night a year where we can pretend to be the scariest thing we think of.

"Winds in the east... there's a mist comin' in... like somethin' is brewin'... and 'bout to begin..." This week, we take a look at an oft-forgotten, direct-to-video release that might've become a modern classic if it debuted in the streaming era. We won't bury the lede here, Trick 'r Treat shou...

No guest for this one (there's no one we can think of that we hate enough to make them watch this trash movie).

Welcome to what is hopefully the last conversation ANYONE will have on the 2001 film Evolution, a bargain bin Ghostbusters rip-off that doesn't check a single box to be worth a revisit. Sorry this is sounding harsher than I mean it - you gotta understand, we just watched this film, recording a full hour...

A midwestern American in the 1300s does medieval battle against the slimiest of bearded slimeballs and his horrifying mom/witch.

This week we revisit a forgotten blockbuster, the 2nd biggest movie of 1991 after Terminator 2: Judgement Day. Kevin Costner stars as the fabled Robin of Locksley, in this dark retelling a veteran of the Crusades returned home to find Alan Rickman's Sheriff of Nottingham poised to claim the ...

Things sure turned out different.
In what way?
Different.

Our summer hours continue as we tackle one of its dog-day classics. For 40 years we've lived with the idea that it could be the best in the genre. Friend of the pod, baseball fan, (and member of the Matt CClub) Matt Cowan joins us to revisit this pastoral classic.  Is it a 5-tool film? Did it need to spend more time in AAA Scranton? Will you ever get th...

Manners. Maketh. Man.

Just a little lax on our release schedule as things open up and weather gets warmer, but we're back with an...old? New. New classic. In a renaissance of comic book movies, this one did well, but didn't seem to percolate like the MCU. Sure, it got a sequel (which we talk about) and is getting a soft reboot (which we're cautiously optimistic about), but what endeared us to the concept in ...

Kirk Douglas, Farrah Fawcett, and Harvey Keitel walk into a space station. I forget the rest of the joke, but the punchline involves a robot and cake.

Ever heard of this one? Even Matt hadn't, and that's saying something. Our hosts have a lot of questions, but thankfully returning guest Mike Simses (2010: The Year We Make Contact) has the answers. We spend this feature-length episode dissecting the anatomy of a m...

Antonio Banderas accompanies some Norsemen to stop the attacks by a hellish pack of bloodthirsty invaders. Who lives? Who dies? Who tells their story? Probably Seamus Heaney at some point.

We're back after our brief excursion to Starfleet to talk about The 13th Warrior, an often forgotten film, so much so that most people don't even realize it's meant to be a retelling of the epic story of Beowulf. Joining M...

Kirk, Spock, Doctor McCoy, and Ensign Ricky must broker peace between the Western Democracy Metaphor and the Eastern Bloc Soviet Metaphor. Hilarity ensues. Also murder.

Happy (belated) First Contact Day! No guest this week, but we're covering not only the last original cast Star Trek movie Frank hasn't seen, but the last original cast Star Trek movie ever. Yeah, yeah, we know about Generations, but that's a ...

We bring you our hot take on the 1997 forgotten mess "Shazam", starring Sinbad and Martin Short.

Joining us once again is the one-and-only Patrick H. Willems (previously on our episode on The Shadow), who brought us a movie that certainly no one is still talking about. A critical and financial failure, in many ways Shazam was the beginning of the end of Sinbad's Hollywood run. Our hosts dive deep into why t...

Adventurer Rick O'Connell (and his family) race an immortal Egyptian mummy to be the one to destroy the Scorpion King, an insectoid WWE wrestler with Barbie Doll-textured skin hellbent on letting his pet dogs run wild.

Joining Matt and Frank today is Mike Ludwig (The Shadow, Independence Day) to talk about 2001's The Mummy Returns, one of the most bonkers big budget sequels of the early 2000s. More action. More e...

Do you think there's a really angry way I could say I'm sorry?

The 90s was a really weird time for everybody, but especially superhero movies. In between nipple-suit Batman and laryngitis Batman, we got Mystery Men. In the same tradition as Austin Powers and Galaxy Quest, this comedian-driven vehicle poked fun at its genre while still appreciating its tropes. Unfortunately, did didn't do too well in the box ...

New Year, Same Us. We're back for another season of Give it 5.

Houston, we have a podcast. Desperate to save face in light of the embarrassment of admitting he had never seen Apollo 13 (go back and listen to our Backdraft episode), Frank brings Mike Lacy back on to right a great wrong. After Matt sent him a 4k blu ray of it for the holidays, all their fates were pretty much sealed.

One of the biggest films of...

We're trying something new for this holiday season.

Your No Flicks Given heroes are coming face-to-face with one of the worst,  my depressing Christmas movies in recent memory: One Magic Christmas. And this isn't a journey we can all take alone, so we're taking you all with us. Listen in as we react live to watching a truly ridiculous store brand classic. Joined once again by Connor & Peter of the Fix-a...