After taking a week off so Raul could teach a boot camp, the God, Money & Sex podcast is back. In this episode, Raul and Vivian discuss how difficult it is for men to be vulnerable. As men, we have been conditioned to not ask for help, and to armor yourself in order to go into battle. But that armor becomes isolating, and ends up becoming a barrier to connecting with your partner, with your friends, and with God.
Men have a tendency of overcompensating for being a strong lion at work, by being a weak pussycat at home because they don’t know how to balance their own needs and their partner’s needs. Women also have a tendency to stay in a nurturing, mother energy, even in situations when it’s appropriate to bring out the temptress state and let loose. As a result, a relationship can get stale and an unspoken frustration seeps in. The best way to deal with this is to have clear conversations to set a strategy to meet an expressed (not tacitly understood) goal. Both partners have to take responsibility, but there is no upside in complaining or blaming.
1:55 Let’s get started
3:05 What happens when one partner decides to grow
4:55 Men put on emotional armor
6:10 Vivian gives advice for men who walk around with armor on
7:34 Why do men wear armor?
9:45 Do you want to win a game?
11:06 You can’t just wing it in a relationship
11:25 Take ownership
12:22 It’s easier to be mad at someone who wronged you than to be mad at yourself for making mistakes
13:50 The Warrior wants to go to battle. The King wants what’s best for the kingdom. Which one are you at that moment?
14:55 The different feminine energies: the mother, the temptress,
17:11 When we become aware of what our energy is, can you change your state?
17:48 Parents and pet parents have less sex because parents are in the nurturing energy
21:35 If it isn’t a dog, it will be some other distraction
22:24 How to win back your wife
23:10 The biggest lesson of this episode
24:27 No one prepares us for relationships and marriage
25:33 The best is yet to come
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