Eddie Chat pod #5 - 3 continents worth

3 weeks, 3 continents. It's been a mad few weeks, but we're back! 
Joined by Dream Beast and legend Peter French Toast Cassidy. We lost 45 minutes of mad chat... Probably for the best, we finished it off in Adelaide. 

This kind of chat won't be found on any other Irish podcast! Spread the word Lods! 

Enjoy the show! 

Tip a mawn! -> Paypal/hardybucks
Patreon/Hardybucks

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:16):
Had a partners. What's going on? It's me Eddie Dirk.
Can hear on the Hardy Books podcast? Come and live? Well,
I'm not live, I'm per recorded, but I'm live doing this.
And I tell you one thing, man, I tell you this, man,
there's no notes. It's just me going off the dome
as usual. Show me anyone else that would go off

(00:39):
the dome like I do, because there's probably a good
couple of one hundred thousand them. Really, Bush, I'm the
man on the day on this podcast, and that's all
there is to us. Right, What have I been doing? Man?
What have I been doing?

Speaker 2 (00:58):
Man?

Speaker 1 (01:00):
As said, what have I've been doing?

Speaker 3 (01:04):
Man?

Speaker 1 (01:07):
Good question? Right. So I'm off to Australia now next week.
First of all, we're going to Dubai to doing the
show down to Dubai. Then we're gonna be down in
Adelaide for a night, then up next day to Perth, Melbourne, Sydney, Queensland.

(01:29):
Let me have a little look here to see what
they actual. I need to figure out what's the deal
man with the gigs. In case, in case you're listening
to this and you're I mean, the likelihood of you
being abroad listening to this. No, it's you know, and
in Australia like, but just so you know, if you
have any friends in any of these places, let them know, man,

(01:51):
let them know. Okay. Here it is.

Speaker 2 (01:53):
Saturday, the first of March, Irish Club Adelaide, Sandai's second match,
Leonard's Lunch, Perth, Tuesday fourth and March Brunswick Ballroom, Melbourne,
Wednesday the fifth of March, the Triffid Brisbane, Thursday the
sixth to March Factory Theaters, Sydney. And then it goes

(02:18):
over to New Zealand. It says Orange Club, Auckland, Saturday
the eighth, the match Sunday North of March, Navarra Lane, Himilton,
Tuesday eleventh, the match Appending Brewery, Willington, Tuesday twelfth match
Strawberry Tree, Kakura, Thursday Thursday the March a rolling Stone Cross, Jurdge, Friday,

(02:38):
fourteenth of March, Ryman Reeson Brewery, Wanaka, Saturday the fifteenth
of March, Searchlight Brewery, Queenstown.

Speaker 1 (02:48):
That's the first time I've actually read the whole list
out loud. See with me and dates, man, I've got
such crucifying I don't know, adhd or maybe a little
bit of dyslexia. I don't know. I mean, I can
read and write and spell no bother. I think it's
more so a bit of discalcia, or it's just that

(03:09):
I told myself that I couldn't, that I wasn't very
good with numbers, and then just decided to be like, no,
that's something I'm not gonna bother with. But lately I've
changed my focus from because you never know when you're fucking, fucking,
fucking sorry about that. You never know when your subconscious
is eavesdropping on you, do you know what I mean?

(03:30):
And as a man who has a history of self
sabotage and shit, because it's easier to not do it
than do it, as if to say, like, sometimes we're
more afraid of success than failure, and what I mean
by that it's easier just to be like, what can
you do? Rather than have to put all the effort

(03:52):
into something that is successful. And on a subconscious level,
you know, we the Royal Way might just like self
sabotage because our subconscious is listening in So to get
over that ship anymore, I'm I've changed my mind and
I'm gonna try and remold the plastics of my brain

(04:13):
is in the gray master by saying I'm going to
do this. I'm gonna read this boring paperwork, I'm gonna
sort this out, and I'm gonna get as Tony Sopranos say,
you gotta get your fucking arms around this thing. You
know what I'm saying, Get your arms around this thing.
You know what I'm saying. Counselor Zelman with them with

(04:37):
the belt, No Tony, no go ahead, run like a bitch.
No Tony, if you leavely.

Speaker 4 (04:54):
Take away.

Speaker 1 (04:56):
And I don't even know that. Fucking I don't know
where that came from. Like I said, this is going
off the dome man, because time is short this weekend
as in what I initially meant.

Speaker 5 (05:06):
To do that?

Speaker 1 (05:07):
What's been going on with me? What's been happening lately, babe? Yeah,
So last weekend I had some very close friends come
over from Ireland to Sweden, which that's kind of broke

(05:30):
the fourth wall somewhat. But the thing is, what are
you gonna do? You know, I'm basically pulling the two
things into one here to get maximum chat on the podcast,
So just suspend your disbelief in that, right. So basically
it was a very busy week. I have lots of stuff
to do, loose ends to tie up. Because Sweden's the

(05:51):
kind of place that was. It was like was built
by the lads who live in the big robotic cube
in Star Trek. You know, the lads at the page
looking lads with pipes sticking out of their heads and stuff,
the borgs. That's what Sweden is like. Everything is automated
and it's all about monthly bills. Everything comes out at
the end of the month, and it's basically your coerced

(06:14):
to play the game in the system. Possibly the quintessential
opposite of Rage against the Machine lyrics from Know your Enemy,
Because I ripped the mic, rip the stage, rip the system.
I was born to rage against them. Fist in your
face in the place and I'll drop the style. Clearly

(06:34):
know your enemy, do you know what I mean? Like,

(06:56):
that's the crack in Sweden. They love people that you know.
There's no escape, man, there's no escape over here. It's
all but you need the rules. The rules. You don't
do the rules in your big trouble, and we send
the bills after you. And if you don't pay the bills,
you can't get loans and I don't want a loan. No,
what do you mean? You don't want the loan because

(07:17):
the cash is king, Man, we don't have cash here?
Why not because the banks tell us it is too
dangerous to stop the robbers from breaking into the banks
stealing all the money. Like, yeah, but what about fucking
a bit of cash, man? Do you know what I mean?
A bit of Johnny, A bit of bom bom bom

(07:38):
bom bom boom boom boom. We don't have no Johnnies here.
But I'm on about the fucking the bit of the
bit of whang, you know what I mean, the bitter,
the bit of a bit of claw weedge. What is
claw wedge? Listen, man, it's fucking schlang for cash, a

(07:59):
bit of Johnny Man. But the fucking Craig Cash, the
lad with the bulging eyes from that fucking series with
Katherine and hern and Ricky Tomilson, McCain, Oven Chips, Royal Family,
that's the one Craig Cash. You've got any Craig on you? Man, No,
we don't have this. We have a Royal family. We

(08:21):
do have Drottening Sylvia and King Gustav. I'm like, no, man,
listen fucking all. You're great with computers and engineering men,
but your brain iss like it's been fucking put in
a breadbin, just left in a dark room filled with
ambient works of craft work, and you're just stuck in

(08:45):
a hall full of mirrors and pie charts all your life. Man,
where's your balls gone? Weren't you fucking Vikings at one stage?
Their Vikings were bad guys. Listen to me, Johnny Swede,
we don't have no Johnnies. Listen whatever you want. Where's
the cash man? We don't have your cashless Whose idea

(09:07):
was it to make a cashless man? Whose idea was
it to make Sweden a cashless society? Because that doesn't
benefit the working man. Where's the owl nixers and the
job beings on the side. You want to go and
buy a phone off? Someone's here. I'll buy it man,
five hundred large iPhone fourteen pro Max job, yeah, sound issue, unlocked?

(09:30):
Good job here. There's a tenor there. Man, get yourself
a pint of that shitty fucking larger. You drink over
there and stuck over man. I have to say, man,
Swedish larger. It's almost like they've brewed it to make
people as hungover as possible the next day to deter
them from drinking. But what it does is it actually

(09:50):
makes people go back on the piss to try and
escape the crushing hangover. Now what I do is when
I'm outing pubs over here, man, I stick to the
one and only clonmel Champagne. I tell you one thing, man,
when I was back in the Motherland, I didn't appreciate Magner's,
oh so known as Buemers. Just didn't appreciate it, man.

(10:11):
But I'll tell you one thing. The fucking pint bottle.
Oh fuck the draft. It's the pint bottle or nothing
for me, man, pint bottle with ice. People are like, oh,
have the draft with ice, and like, ah, yeah, more ice,
less cider. I know how that one goes. Plus you
don't even get the full pint the pint bottle five

(10:32):
hundred and sixty eight millileases of absolute refreshment lest your
good while beautiful stuff. Now, So with that in mind,
it was a busy weekend and I played a I
played two gigs in one night. First one was for
the anniversary of a good friend of mine who passed
away twenty years ago, and the name of the band

(10:53):
was Dead Playboys. I got up and I opened up
for them, and then afterwards I played played a bit
of mules at there. Man in vstrooms in the new
vstrooms there and Kungs gantten good old fucking spot man
lovely staff, great magners. Oh and earlier on in the
day I took the kids to Monster Jam because some

(11:14):
good mates with the lads who build the tracks there
with the jam of monsters. I have the same man,
I wouldn't mind the job as a monster truck driver,
but like, how would I even you know, how would
you even get your hands on one? I met a
Swedish doll, an older doll. She wasn't saying much. She
was gonna ask her what the crack was because apparently
she owned a monster truck. See that's the thing with Sweden. Man,

(11:36):
You've got a lot of weird old money going around
that's connected to the States. Like you know, you don't
even know who you're talking to over here, Like it's
a met old spot. But that was the crack of
the weekend. Very busy did about twenty thousand steps there
on the Saturday. Like I said, I'm tying up these
loose ends over here, because if I go away to Australia, yeah,

(11:58):
they'll be like, where are you? You have things to
do a reminder? Oh it's late now. Now you have
to pay this. Now you have to pay a reminders fee.
Oh there's compound interest on that. It's just like, I
want all the fucking debts to be settled so I
don't accidentally get charged, because there counts. I got a
I got a bill once, a parking ticket, and I

(12:20):
wouldn't mind. I parked on a day where it was
a worry parking, but I decided to park in a
place because I had a permit and I was guaranteed
the parking space. When I closed the door, the owl
the owl leaflet slipped down slightly underneath the plastic film
at the edge of the windscreen. I come out, I
put the I put the timer on the disc the

(12:40):
time job, and this thing slipped down. I came out
and there's a bill for eighty quid. And I was like,
I'm not fucking paying that, man, I'm not paying it, man.
And it got to the point where I rang up
and I said, look, this is I had the thing
there and you could you could read it. You could
actually read it was in date, and they're like, well,
you can keep appealing it, and every city weeks they'll
give you a verdict. So I kept appeeling it over

(13:03):
and over again to the point where I was just
writing absurd shit to them. And if you hold with
me now, I'm going to find her here. You find
her window, and I tell you, I'll tell you. I'll
tell you what I was writing for these boys. Unfortunately
I can't find it, and I wouldn't mind. I spent

(13:25):
the last fifteen minutes of all the jobs I've got
to do this. This is like, as my mother would
say to me, you'd waste so much time. Like I
get into my head often that I need to find
something and then I'll go looking for it, and then
spend an hour two looking for something, even though it's
probably there. Like I've had this computer for years now

(13:47):
and it's just to clear up my desktop. I put
things into files and into other files, so it's it's
so meta. It's like inception but minus the production value.
Is just an inception of shy put into other folders.
And I'm gonna go looking for it that I don't
know where it's gone, and it's been so long looking
for it, I've kind of forgot the run of myself. Right.

(14:09):
It was a great weekend and I have a lot
of jobs to do, is basically the moral of the story.
I didn't get the podcast out of the weekend because
I'd love to do so. Here it is. So it
started off talking and utter fucking bollocks about the lack
of cash in Sweden, which is bollocks. And you know,
cash is the grease that keeps the wheels turning for

(14:30):
the little man. Also criminals, but like, look, you're gonna
make an omelet, you have to crack a few eggs.
There is an element of criminalogy with cash. But like basically,
if you're the man who's holding the per strings aka
the government and then central banking, then it's like, oh,
let's just squeeze every ounce of fucking production out of

(14:51):
the working man. The working man's getting squeezed, and I
don't like it when the working man gets squeezed. Man,
any squeezing to be done, then I don't want to
be sculls on my dime. I'm gonna write a song
note called Squeezing the Working Man.

Speaker 4 (15:10):
Stop Squeezing the working man.

Speaker 6 (15:16):
Taking the money out of our hands.

Speaker 1 (15:22):
You dirty banking bastardy.

Speaker 4 (15:33):
Who the fuck do you think you are? Making this
world cashless?

Speaker 7 (15:39):
And these dickheads in the parliamentious say, because they ain't got.

Speaker 1 (15:50):
No balls, no fucking they ain't gotten no screwples.

Speaker 6 (16:00):
So it looks like it's time for me to go
down to divorce with my big ex hand. Gonna meet
me up.

Speaker 1 (16:19):
Clouds Swap and shove it up with spotty fat ass.
Wat's klaud Schwap doing down there in Switzerland?

Speaker 4 (16:36):
What's he doing?

Speaker 1 (16:38):
Is he doing some weird shit with a cern machine?
Is he summon in some squeart space.

Speaker 4 (16:50):
Demons to cause more shite on this round?

Speaker 1 (16:58):
I don't fucking know. Oh, but he's gonna.

Speaker 6 (17:03):
Get a fucking done.

Speaker 4 (17:10):
These bankers.

Speaker 1 (17:14):
I'm not talking about the dudes down in the ay
on the high streets. I'm talking about these the Switzerland counts.
It looks like it's a job for Jackie Chan and
Christine Tucker. I heard Chris Tucker was on Epstein's island.

Speaker 4 (17:44):
What the fuck was he doing there?

Speaker 1 (17:50):
Hanging out with horse face Epstein himself reprising his role
from the Fifth.

Speaker 4 (18:00):
Man. But leave the working man alone.

Speaker 1 (18:09):
It was cash into the close, and we'll say no more.

Speaker 4 (18:19):
Just close the fucking door, stop squeezing the working man,

(18:52):
or you deal with me and Jackie.

Speaker 7 (18:55):
Jam We'll come loaded with cakes and the handles of
the axe.

Speaker 4 (19:04):
Pick I said that backwards.

Speaker 1 (19:08):
Because it right right. So that was that more time
spent producing that? Okay, I hope you enjoyed that. Maybe

(19:29):
that's the bones of a new song. Leave the working
Man alone, just let us get on with our lives.
Is that too much to ask for it? We're all
being fucked lads and ladies, aren't we? Like? Just look
around you? Does this look like we're living in a
normal I mean, is it like when remember the nineties
everyone seemed to have plenty? You know, those times are

(19:52):
hard sometimes, Like, but just what the fuck is going on?
You know? We need a clear house. Lads need clearhouse.
A lot of dickheads up running the show that they've
got the row messianic, weird fucking complex going on. Get
rid of them assholes. But enough about that now that
just came out of the So let me see section two.

(20:13):
What's going on up at all Man? Very good question. Well,
there's a bit of gossip all Man. I haven't really
heard much gosp Brown Town as I've been very busy,
haven't heard much gossip at all. Yeah, it's been quiet.
No one, no one I know, has passed away. I

(20:34):
haven't heard the death notes on Midwest, but I'm sure
the old lady will be sitting beside the radio listening
if there's any funerals uptown she has to go to.
Because towns, you know, like small towns like where we're from,
there's people dying all the time. And do you know
what I mean? And my auntie in law once said,

(20:54):
people dying though that was never dying before. And you know,
it's like what French Toasteratool said when he drove past
the graveyard. He said, how many people are dead in there?
And I went, I don't know, man, eight hundred and
sixty they're all dead, man, ha haa. But what about

(21:16):
the lad who was laying flowers daffodils in the middle
of the cool spring evening. It was dearly departed, God
rest her. But yeah, it's a it's a reminder man, mortality.
It is a reminder. It's like it's like someone put
the fucking Unknown stop watch. It's basically like many I

(21:39):
think about how much time I spent pissing about man
and you know, just knocking around on the on the
phone in the house and just being a lazy fucker.
And then like this trip going abroad reminds me of
the fine act amount of time and energy you can
actually you know, you can actually have when you're up

(22:01):
against it. But look at the moral of this is
enjoy your time here on this planet, and random acts
of kindness beget other random acts of kindness. And you
might be like, oh God, you can some fucking like, oh,
make a man dala for me and let's all sit
in a drum circle and start chanting something from a

(22:23):
rainbow gathering of new age bollocks. But I'm not man.
It's basically I believe like good deeds are like throwing
a handful of pebbles into a pond, and each one
of those impacts ripples out and intersects in every other
ripple and again, as Nikolai Tesla would say, if you

(22:44):
want to understand the universe, think of energy, vibration, and frequency,
And the best frequency you can give out there is gratitude.
Even if you're going through some hard times, like just
think right, we'll get through it. This too, shell pass
And if you're going through a good time, make sure

(23:04):
you say thank God it's going well, you know what
I mean, and just have a bit of gratitude. So
I don't know that how that ties into the talk
of the town, but that's my philosophy. And also, do
you know sometimes when you go through hard times, you
know you need to know through You need to know
that you know, shit's gonna happen in life, and life
can throw you some shitty curveballs or can throw you

(23:24):
some great curve balls. But if you're trying and hold
onto the bulls horns too hard, he'll book you off.
You'll be bucked up, lying on the ground going, oh man,
I just got done in by the bull. Always gonna
try and gore me. No help me out, boys for
the bull gores me and it's like leave me be please,

(23:46):
but like you've just gotta it's gotta right. The wave
Man rolling Keaton.

Speaker 2 (23:51):
Style from Boom.

Speaker 1 (23:57):
That song was apparently written by the Bald lad from
that band New Radicals. I remember that when I was
sixteen that came out, just seeing ronand Keaton floating around
levitating in the woods, wearing a pair of leather pants
and the black shirt that was open to the third button.
I like to go around with the shirt open, like

(24:17):
do you know what I mean? I was blessed with
a large chest, same with the owl, boy, do you
know what I mean? And the further you go into
a night out and the pints to be present, the
more the chest is exposed. I don't know how it happens, man,
Do I do it intentionally or does it just happen
over the course of the night. But I've been rocking

(24:37):
the mustache lately as well. That's that's a good I'm
getting back to the old Tom Selleck Burt Reynolds. Because
for a lot of years there, if you had a mustache,
people be like, what's that fucking young fella doing with
a mustache? Man? But I see there's a lot of
people like there's a lot of trendy fucking boys over
here in Stockhow Man. They go to this place called Geronimo's.

(24:58):
And I know the guy who opened. His name's Joseph.
He's of the Assyrian Dinish d and they're great businessman.
And I remember, like ten years ago he said, yeah, man,
I'm gonna open the place. It's gonna be really cool
rock music. I know those guys, man, helicopters, I know
all those guys. Yeah, they're my friends, man, And I

(25:18):
was thinking, fucking hell, man, the old Town could really
do with like a good trendy rock bar. But the
thing is, because Sweden is so exclusive, you know, everything
has to be predicated upon subcultures, do you know what
I mean? It's like that's why Irish bars are more cracked,
because everyone goes in. It doesn't matter what age you are,

(25:39):
what you listen to, what you look like, what you're working,
the time you're in that pub. I mean, the pub
in itself is a strange dimensional place, especially if you
only see people inside that one room the pub. You know,
it's like a time and place where these people only exist.
It's like going onto the hollow deck of Star Trek's

(26:00):
next generation as a wolf, you know what I mean? Like,
just pull me up an Irish bar quick, make it
so number one, uh sir. The Irish pub in particular
does not serve magners aboard mission. Now. Well that said,
these dudes, man, they go around wearing drain pipe jeans,

(26:22):
long hair, seventies American kind of out there in Palm
Springs kind of vibe, you know, like Black Sabbath, early
Judas Priest, you know, like bullets on belts, cloth hold
all bags, you know, very tight jeans and leather jackets.

(26:43):
It's a certain subculture that like, you know, most of
them are in a band, and they have a following
of about maybe five hundred people, and they all go
to each other's gigs, and they're the poster artwork for
their gigs is like some sort of chicken claw with
some occultic bollocks written around it, or like a throwback
to some sort of Manson esque Sun Cult fucking drivel,

(27:08):
and they're always like, you know, a lot of them
are nice people, but it's just that it's like they
don't go anywhere else, and it's like they're kind of
stuck in a very niche genre. Beforehand, it was very
popular to be into eighties glam rock, your West Coast Sleez,
Motley Crue kind of stuff, New fucking La Guns, which

(27:33):
I liked. A lot of my friends were part of
the the sleeze rock genre. Daniel Lisenman and the Boys.
I'm kind of great guys, great guys, but but the
thing is the mantra of of that was like, you know,
like full bodied women wearing like torn up stockings and

(27:54):
teased hair and lads who were Their ethos was all
about girls, girls, girls as well. I love my heart girls, girls, girls.
Have you heard the news in the so Motley Crue,
Girls Girls Girls, Great fucking album, great album, great back
in the day when Nick, when fucking Vince Neil could sing.

(28:17):
But for me, I've always been in the hard rock.
But I mean, and when I first came to Sweden,
I look again, we're going to measure. You know. It's
basically like yeah, I mean character, right, but just go
with it. Suspend your fucking disbelief. Don't be on there
read it being like, oh he's choking and character you
didn't even know who he is anymore. I like the character.
It's like wearing a pair of fucking shoes. It's like

(28:37):
wearing a nice pair of boots you've had for a
couple of years, you know what I mean. I like
the little of it. We like the way it flows on,
like the sounds, like the way it trips off the tongue.
It's very comfortable, do you know what I mean? It's
very nice. I get more oad of the we'll park
that post there yet you get me Verny going, look
at the fucking mel Man. Do you look at the
fucking milon coming out there?

Speaker 4 (28:59):
Look at the moon is coming out the fucking shaman.
Look at them mill?

Speaker 1 (29:07):
Sorry about that. It's gotta be carried away. So yeah,
big into the rock and roll stuff. And you might
have noticed I'm playing a lot of pentatonic miners there.
But I do like this this podcast, and I'm going
to do it and I'm gonna keep it going because
my problem in the past is consistency. And it does

(29:27):
take a long time to put these together. A because
I waffle off the dome when I get distracted. B
I go looking for bullshit like my appeals letters to
those parking whankers. And see, I have quite a lot
of shit to do on a daily basis. So all
these things are woven together. And also when I get
into something and I'm one hundred percent dedicated to it,
then and I kind of can't stop until I think

(29:48):
it's a masterpiece in my own right. Some people might
listen to and go, what the fuck is this lad
on about? Man, it's totally waffle. But if you're of
the If you're of the kind of people who like
left field, satirical fucking madness, well this is yours. If
you want to listen to people talking about fucking I
don't know radio ballocks that you get people talking on

(30:12):
mainstream radio keeping it nice and safe. This isn't where
you're gonna get it. You get your clear cut, kick
it your cakey, but chi it jiky, You're not gonna
get that shit here. You know what I mean. Do
you ever get to shift when you're old man? Ha
ha shift in class? Did you ever get wanked off? Oh?
Class man? Did you ever blow the beans? It never

(30:34):
gets that far, though, does it, do You know what
I mean? Never gets that far. I'll tell you one thing, man,
I'll take it far, take it to dimensions of shit.
You'll hear lads down the pub talking it's funny how
you've got pub chat. Yeah, and then you've got public
record chat. And even if it is done with a
degree of irony, you'll have people twitching their curtains to

(31:00):
it and be like, Oh, it's terrible. Where's the ombutzman?
Where's offcome? I need to make a complaint. I have
to complain about this. It's my life work. My life's work.
Because I don't create anything myself. I just have to
complain and slack stuff off. Look, man, I can't watch
TV anymore right, especially in Ireland. I can't do it

(31:21):
because I've met half the fuckers on TV and I'm like, oh,
I recognize that for oh yeah, and that's what happened.
Being in TV ruined TV for me. But what are
you gonna do? People gotta get paid while promoting shite.
So that's the way it goes. That is the way
it goes. But you know, you know these adverts man,
you know what I mean? Like it's De Rijo's advert

(31:42):
and it's like, oh, so zany and hilarious. You know
if you know my fucking opinion on adverts, Now you
know what I mean. If you're gonna do an advert,
you're gonna do it right. You're gonna have complete control
over the advert and you have to take the absolute
piss when you're making the adverts. But the thing is,
these big companies and agencies they don't want they don't
want Mavericks man, they don't want a bergerac figure. They

(32:06):
don't want someone who's going to break the rules, throw
it out the window. Do you know what I mean?
But do you though? But do you right? Next section? Okay,
let me see sports news right, sports news man, Super

(32:27):
Bowl h Philadelphia Eagles bet the Kaiser Chiefs. So that
was a big result there. Man, I saw a clip
of a woman in the audience stabbing a homemade voodoo
doll with a knitt and with a like a pin repeatedly.
I mean, talk about taking the crack a bit too,
fire man. Do you know what I mean? Like, I

(32:48):
wouldn't mind. It was a white woman, fat white woman.
Where did she get that? She must have made it
at home? Did she go down to the local witch
doctor or one of these people? And be like, I mean,
imagine the mindset. You know, you've obviously you said a
few prayers. You know, your favorite team is in the
is in the Cup Winners Cup, Championship of the All
Star Power Brothers. But like, you know, taking a homemade

(33:10):
voodoo doll stabbing it with a needle, I mean, that's
just it's beyond weird, man, It's beyond weird, I'll tell you.
And a lot of this shit, man, there's all this
fucking thrown hexes and curses, it fucking bounces back on cunts,
do you know what I mean? You've just got to
be mellow and be like fair play to them. And
I know sometimes it's hard, it's hard to have that humility,

(33:33):
but you know, you just gotta fucking not compare yourself
to others. Stay on your own road and you know,
put a bit of graft in and keep it consistent,
you know, because we're all we're all on the same
motorwaye you know what I mean, We're all going off
the multi colored waterfall at the end into the unknown,

(33:56):
and all of us, all of us. It's like it's
like when you get the driving license and you're on
the road. You could be driving a nice Porsche nine
to eleven Carrera, could be driving a Score Octavia or
a Hyas Van. Doesn't matter, man, You're all allowed to
be on the road. And that's what life is like.

(34:17):
And sometimes people in your own field will do better
or worse than you. You'll be doing well, but it's
you know, don't compare yourself to others. I was always
comparing myself to like top flight guitarists like fucking Dineback,
Darrell and Zach Wild nun No Betton Court. You know,
Marti Friedman from Mega Death, and then Jimmy Page, Hendrix,

(34:41):
Rory Gallaher, Scott o'ran, Gary Moore. The list is endless,
Eddie van Halen, but there's no point man. And I
remember if fair Player to knew no Betton Court, the
guitaristrom Extreme. He was once in a video interview. He'd said,
stop trying to sound like other people. Just develop your

(35:02):
own style. And that's I suppose to take away for
life itself. Man, do you know what I mean. It's
like I've often compared myself to others growing up and
in my adult life, and then you just got to
come to it and be like, make your own style,
you know, take inspiration from these things, but forward your
own path and then keep going, be consistent, keep churning

(35:25):
it out. And I think if you're of a creative mindset,
then it is important to be creative because if you're
not creative, you're not feeling active in your role of creation,
then you'll find other ways to be creative and not
such a you know, in destructive ways. So always be creating, man,
Always be creating. Everyone's got a talent. You just got

(35:47):
to figure out what the talent is. I mean, like, like,
I'm not blowing my own fucking trumpet, but I'm multi
talented in many aspects. But my thing is, I know
how much work has to go into stuff, and I'm like,
after I've done some and I'm like, oh, I've set
the bar too high, man, set the fucking bar too high.
And you know how much graft goes into it. But

(36:07):
the thing is, nothing comes for free. You're not gonna
get it's not gonna be handed to you. You have
to keep like. This is me talking to myself as
well as anyone in the audience who might be like,
wouldn't mind learning the guitar man, wouldn't mind learning how
to paint, wouldn't mind doing a fucking potter course, whatever, sports,

(36:27):
you know, just whatever you like doing, make time for
it and do it, and you know it's the change
comes in incrementally, whether you want to get fit or
you want to learn how to cook. Cooking is a
great skill. It's great to have. Last night I made
a red curry and I have to say it got

(36:48):
a bit freaked out at the end because I was
looking at these little squiggly, transparent worm looking things in
the botman. I was like, what the fuck is that?

Speaker 4 (36:54):
Man?

Speaker 1 (36:54):
Am I after eating a whole load of fucking worms
and parasites? Oh God? But I realized I'd put the
zucchini quite thinly and left it on too long and
the fibers came out. Fair Blair the chat GBT, I said, Chat,
come here to me. What what are these squiggly things
in my red curry? I mean, even though I knew,

(37:14):
because I started like using the power of deduction to
look at the segment of zucchini and I could see
it was indeed the zucchini. I had to ask Chat
just beyond say side, Chat's seen me good. So that's
the supporting us anyway, Sporting News, Fucking Liverpool lost to
Plymouth Argyle in the f A Cup, so that's that

(37:37):
was That was a surprise. Someone said in the comments section,
I can't remember what the fuck I said of something like, no,
I can't remember something about fucking Liverpool didn't turn up
foret It's gone. It's gone, It's gone forever and I'm
not looking it up. But Liverpool, maeh, they're basically they

(37:58):
weren't artist about it the last and Plymouth Ray Guyle
Fair play them. I'll be made up. See Plymouth ray
guy will win it. Do you know what I mean?
When you'd see when you see like a Division III
team win the win the FA Cup, that'd be fantastic.
Didn't Woking once win or they get close to win
about twenty odd years ago Woking that was good. But

(38:21):
other sports news, you know what, I'll just look up
sports news just to give you a you know, just
to see what's happening here and now. Ronnie ol Sullivan
fan traveled six hours to watch Rocket in action. Fair
play to that lad. Six hours. I mean, Jesus is
not that bad? Like you know what I mean, Like
people have to go places to see people perform at venues.

(38:42):
I mean, how's that? I mean if gb news of course,
Manchester City sent fear the worst warning after real Madrid collapse.
Sweden goalie breakdown for Foreig Nations face off opener. Can
you see deep into my soul? Who was his? Can
the HC keeps starting?

Speaker 5 (39:02):
Got?

Speaker 1 (39:02):
Yeah? I don't know who's going on. We're going to
BBC Sports have a look fixtures and news and stuff. Okay,
Evertton versus Liverpool build up to final, mazy side Abby
a gouddness and pack. I don't want to see you know,
you know what really fucking does my head in right? Cookies? Like,
can you is there any if you know of any

(39:23):
way where a man can just browse the Internet and
automatically not have to go into I don't want them
to track my data, obviously, but I I want them
to reject all automatically. If anyone knows, reach out and
reach out and tell me do but dude, do but
do but dude, dude, come on for fox sake, man, Yeah,

(39:48):
it's just stuck, won't won't reject?

Speaker 5 (39:53):
Right?

Speaker 1 (39:54):
I was watching the rugby there on Sunday between between
Scotland and Ireland. A great touch man and those boys
have mullets and mustaches. Look at it. Won't even let
me reject do you know what? Fuck you BBC? Fuck you.
That's most some parliamentary language. I know, I retract it,

(40:15):
I retract it. Fuck you babys, fuck you. It's most
in parliamentary, most in parliamentary. Okay, well are we looking
all right? That's the fucking sports news man. I don't know.
I was good, good at the rugby there at the weekend,
enjoyed a few pints, a couple of landingers landing the plane. There,
big show out to Fikin and Amy for coming over
the Henchman and the rest of the gang. Fair play idea.

(40:37):
It was good old crack. Good old crack was had
the super Bowl. Couldn't go to that, but there was
usually a lock in session, but an X block the
way there that she was in her usual passive aggressive way,
So didn't go to that. Didn't go to that, But
to be honest, I didn't really want to go. But

(40:57):
then when I was in later on, I was looking
like shaped a good crack. But I had enough of
that cracking now over the weekend. And to be honest
with you, what was it? You know, say, oh shit,
like you know what I mean? American football, Like you know,
this is the sixteenth touchdown and the fifteenth quadrant. I
don't know what the fuck I'm talking about anymore. But no, Like,

(41:19):
how can you make a game so so difficult? Do
you know what I mean? It's like there's a there's
about each team brings about four hundred people onto the
pitch with them, you know, like every player has got
about nineteen lads around them, Dudes with like head headsets
and microphones, and it's like, you know, at least football
it's pretty simple. It's like get as many goals into

(41:41):
the net as you can. Job done, whereas like, I
don't know, man, fucking I mean, if you're listening to
this in the States, you're like, what are you talking about? Man?
Everyone knows how football works. Did you not play it
in school? I'm like, no, man, I didn't, but I did.
I'd like all the cool the cool designs on the shirts, man,

(42:04):
the helmets and on the pattern and all that. But
then you look at rugby and you're like, these lads
are just going in smashing each other without any head gear,
and they seem to be doing all right. Man, it
seems maybe that all the protective head gear is actually
doing more damage to the because you're going in full blast,
like banging heads off each other, whereas like in rugby
you're kind of not so much doing that. I don't know.

(42:27):
I should have been a rugby player, but I just
couldn't be hers going down to ballana of a night.
I would have made a great rugby player because I'm
a big old bastard and at the time I did
enjoy full contact sports. But I just thought to myself,
you know, school nights, going like in a forty five
minute bus drive to tag out and roll around in

(42:48):
the dirt until like nine o'clock at night, come back,
then shower up first thing in the morning of school.
It was kind of like, nah, I think I'll just
play Grant Rismore and knock around in that time. Man.
I clocked Resident Evil three in about a day and
a half while there were lads down there in the

(43:09):
pitching ball and I rolling round, strong men rolling round,
lads rolling round, and mud and frost on a coal
November's night, and I thought himself, I fuck that crack.
I went down went down once without any KIT. I

(43:30):
was playing with the school pats, and I was like,
fuck this crack. I mean, maybe it would have been
better if I turned up with an actual kid like,
but I just went down. And the second time went down,
went down with French doors and a few boys. We
just went drinking and then we got stopped by the
guards and that was about it. Really never bother going

(43:50):
down again, especially after grand Urismo Kit two came out.
I was just like, that was it? Then? Playing playing
Grandurismo of an evening hanging out with lads around town,
drizzly nights up town, just giving out cheek watching cars
pass by like Cornerboy Disciples entertainment films. I've been watching

(44:13):
Peep Show again. I mean, it is indeed one of
my favorite comedy shows of all time. Brilliant, Man, it's funny.
Wouldn't mind going there, man, travel destinations? Where would? I'm yeah,
we're back again here, man. Listen for all you listeners
out there. I was. I was so busy during the

(44:35):
week with all the shitt I had to put up with. Man,
you don't understand the amount of fucking tasks that I did.
But I'm out. I got out of got out of Sweden,
I went to Manouth. Was hanging out with fucking Paddy Patton,
Paddy Schween. Paddy. If you listen to this, man, you're
a fucking sound man, and I love you very very much.
And I'll tell you one. I think that man is

(44:55):
now the head physio of Ross Common Senior team. He's
a legend. He's rubbing lad's legs. Gone ah ha ha ha,
look at me man and wearing Val Kilmer, Johnny Depp
fucking purple shades. Job got a great leather jacket. That man.
I went into his fridge. There was no full thatch stuff.
It was all light. He's got a six pack in pex, man,

(45:16):
and he knows how to work the fucking glutamuses. Now here, Listen,
we're over here in Dubai. Now, so I was in Sweden.
Now we're in Dubai's Night one in the hotel room,
and I've got a main man here, the main man himself.
That I am very proud. I've known this man since
we were playing on the fucking pitch in Swinford back
in the day, Fucking Heights boys, man, fucking Jiffy mcginni piss,

(45:40):
holy fucking.

Speaker 3 (45:44):
We were on pills together, Stephen Brennan. Stephen Brennan now
works for the guards, but we're all on pills. One night,
can go there twenty years ago. Listen, Steve, I'm sorry
thrown under the bus, but you were there, man, And
I'd be liar to say it weren't there, but St
Pete or Fresh Toast he was there.

Speaker 1 (46:05):
Going hell fucking Jeffy man fucking mc guinea. First dose
fucking wasn't even the thing then, and there he was,
man off his fucking tits mentioning the Heights boys, and
here he is now twenty years later with me in
Dubai and not to drop a drink on him. And
I tell you this, I tell you this. I was down.
I was downing fibber McGee. I had a few ways

(46:29):
peegee feel had I had to because there was sixty
two euro for an armband, and I was like, I'm
getting my money's worth out of food and drink, and
that's what I did. Towards the end of it, I
was like, I cannot drink no more. There's no benefit
to me. I'm going home to bed. But then I
thought to myself, pig, he said myself. French Dustin were

(46:51):
sharing the fucking bedroom here now. And I was like,
I need to get that podcast up because I heard
the podcast heard us doing well in the Irish charts.
Man there was one up above, a certain fucking podcaster
from Mayo who was doing well. He's a lad who
goes around wearing suits. He's looking strong man. And then
fucking Stevie the cowboy. Kelly said to me, you're up

(47:15):
above there now, you're doing well on the podcast charts.
I was like, I have to give.

Speaker 5 (47:19):
Encouragement you needed. Was that was the character and stick
that you needed. And the podcast I just listened to
the previous Martine and it's very good.

Speaker 1 (47:30):
Sorry, got to keep the Reddit people the red people? Sorry? Sorry?

Speaker 5 (47:33):
So who are these red people? Just fucking like a
bunch of fucking games that should.

Speaker 1 (47:37):
Be would you would you take team?

Speaker 5 (47:41):
I would take I would take a government grant to
go around sodomizing with all the Reddish users.

Speaker 1 (47:47):
Would you do it with your penis or would it
be other incrudiments.

Speaker 5 (47:51):
Whatever facilities that are at.

Speaker 1 (47:57):
I was looking for. Yeah, there was a man there
on tikto occuparently given out to me, and people were saying,
there's a lad there now given out about you there
on probably because he's jealous that I A have a
great jaw line. B. I've had sex with more women
than he's had hot dinners. See, I've children, I've rare children. D.

(48:18):
I've had a fucking successful enough career like and uh
and and E. I've had fucking physical street fights many times.
But I'm just it's it's it's it's what it is
is the son of its parts. Man. I've had my
beloved pet dogs die in my arms. I've you know,
I've felt what it's like to hold a newborn baby

(48:42):
my arms. I felt what it's like to have a
friend die in my arms. You know, I've lived, I've
lived five lives in one and you've got these this
this lad as you said yourself. Or was Gavigan the Henchman,
a guy who looked like the penguin from fucking Tim
Burton's Batman two? Yeah, I mean look at the.

Speaker 5 (49:03):
Same whomen's cool approach to the character.

Speaker 1 (49:06):
No, man, he's got a good few followers there in TikTok.
He was giving out about me. And I watched the
video and I was like, I was gonna fucking tear
lumps off him. I was gonna be like, you know,
and I'm gonna really fucking come back at you. And
I looked at the comments sections like there's no need, man,
and I'm when I look at him, I was like,
you know what, man, I have no fucking malice or
ill intentions towards him. And if anything, saying no vena from,

(49:29):
my mother went to knock and she said, in no
vena from that's how that's how much prayer this man needs.
But if you're if I know you're listening, to this man.
I know you're on Reddish Forward Slash Hardy Books. I
know the a couple of there. There's about fucking four
or five counts there on Reddish, And I know you're
soft people. I know you're you're fucking misguided.

Speaker 5 (49:49):
You care about the four or five people you should
be caring about the people that appreciate.

Speaker 1 (49:53):
Of course I do.

Speaker 5 (49:53):
I'm kind of like when you draw a picture. You're
just like when you draw a picture and you're you're
young and you're drawn pictures and you're drawing the picture
and you're like, you can only see what was wrong
with the picture. And he kept walking about with the picture,
and then he ended up making look fucking ship. So
you just have to acknowledge you what's good.

Speaker 1 (50:10):
You know what I watched. I watched the video of
that lad. Right, I watched the video of that lad
and I seen him. He took a personal disliking to me.
He made three videos about me and you lads, yourself
and the cowboy. You know what I mean. He didn't
like you lads, but he really didn't like me.

Speaker 5 (50:27):
Why didn't he like you?

Speaker 1 (50:28):
I think it's because he sees the fucking raw power
of this man, and he knows that if he was
to meet me, he just wants to get my attention.
You've got you. Look, whatever your fucking name is, man,
I know you're from Fingers because it was Lad who
got in touch. And he said, listen, I know who
he is. I see him down the newsagents and if
and it angered this man that he was talking bad

(50:50):
about me, and he said he's gonna he's gonna give
you a few thumps when he sees you. And I said,
don't do that. Man's no worries, you know, Yeah, no,
I said, when you're in this game, man, you know
you gotta fucking take You're in the public guy. Man,
people are not gonna like you. But I thought to myself, whoever,
this lad is right? So watch the video and I thought,
you know what, let's fucking meet up. Man, Let's meet up.

(51:12):
We'll go for a couple of chicken with a couple
of beers. I'll take you out with me. Man. We'll
share stories, your life story, my story, and I guarantee
you this. Man, I know you were talking shy about me,
but look, man, the fucking offer, the invitation is out there. Man,
I'll take it in my massive fucking hands and I'll
bring you in and I'll give you a squeeze. Man, give
you a look. What's your name?

Speaker 8 (51:33):
Man?

Speaker 1 (51:34):
Come on, We're going to town a couple of points
and I'll fucking i'll share with you the information that
my life has gained and I'll pass it on to you.
Do you know what I mean? And I'll give you
some fucking words of wisdom and fucking heart taking pain
and the triumph and tribulation that I've been through. And
rather than me going yeah about, I wouldn't do that, man,

(51:59):
when I would do is I will get on to
me there and fucking TikTok man. I can't guarantee all
branch job and any other fucking counts, you know what
I mean? Anyone else talking shit? Do it from like.

Speaker 5 (52:19):
Part of wisdom about your life and we're all humans?

Speaker 1 (52:26):
No, no, no, no, look look man, look it is
what it is. But listen, man, it's an official invitation.
Just just come on for a few pints. Listen, man,
I'll introduce you a couple of women. You get your
dick sooked, you know what I mean? You'll be like
you just like women introd. Look, if you want to
get bummed or you're into bumming or into having sex

(52:47):
with women. Whatever, Man, I will will fucking fix you up.
We'll fix you up with some fucking hard loving, will
fucking set you off there on your life path and
you'll be like at the end of it, you'll be like,
if you say, we'll convert you, man, we got a
couple of women into the mixing fucking lads or whatever.
You know what I mean. Well, we'll figure out where

(53:09):
your calibration lies. Yeah, we'll figure out what you want. Man,
We'll help you out. I know you've got seventeen thousand
followers there on doing well, man, he's doing. We we
will be there for you. Man, we will be there
for you. And listen, man, we'll fucking take you under
our wings. And then no, no, no, I just want
to finish this. We'll take you under our wings and

(53:29):
you will be with us. Then you'll be in our crew.
And then you tell your mates and fucking Reddit Forward
slash Hardy books you're like, you know, man, I was wrong.
These lads were fucking sound. I always thought like they
were just middle aged fucking nutterers, like you know what
I mean. I thought the day is fucking the sun
has set on their fucking empire, fucking low, low budget,

(53:53):
fucking archie comedy and playing in various pubs across the world.
And I was like, listen, man, listen, listen, fucking hey, hey,
weird will look after you, man, you know what I mean.
And then we'll all be mates. And then when you
get married, then we'll be at the wedding and i'd
be looking at you there as you're proposing to whoever

(54:14):
the fuck you marrying like matter, woman doesn't matter, like
you know what I mean. And then when you're off
out the front of the fucking ceremony job, I'll have
the boom box there, man with the MP three, the
fucking phone connected to the boom box, and they'll be
like love lift is up, weep blog and the Mountain
sad with the e gles cray. What we'll do. We'll

(54:39):
give you a king's chair, man, the king's chair. Remember
that fucking weird, bizarre, metaphysical fucking middle of the road,
the fucking experiment of quantum physics where if you rubbed
your hands over someone's head, there had to be four
of you, right, and you had to rub your hands

(54:59):
over some his head and caused static electricity. And then
you put your two hands together in like a gun position,
linked up the botton fingers, and then you found two
lads were would lift under the armpit, two lads under
the knee, and then you could lift them up real easy.
Was it was magical static fucking quantum. Joe Rogan Man,

(55:22):
he was on the fucking kings chair just to give him.
I heard him and Tom Cruise, man of them got
a helicopter out in the middle of that havid desert,
right and then like they jumped out of the helicopter naked. Yeah,
and then there was just fucking loads of Navy seal

(55:43):
boys just chasing them through the through the desert. Man
and you the rest of it.

Speaker 5 (55:49):
Now, Man, he treats himself every every birthday, you kind
of trip in the desert. Loo open treats himself. He
gets he gets a hit. Start, he's wearing a cool
watchle he gets a hurt. They're synchronized watches the guys,
the Navy seals on the helicopters.

Speaker 1 (56:09):
Black and Eric Banner and the boys.

Speaker 5 (56:12):
Yeah, he gets a hit, start to drop him in
desert some place, and then the boys try to find him.

Speaker 1 (56:18):
Did the meat open, John, I mean, oh and welcome back.
There was a bit of a fault there with the podcast.
We record another forty five minutes of absolute mad ship
myself in French toastal tool here and what happened is

(56:40):
we deleted it accidentally. It's gone. I try to recover it.
But probably a good thing it didn't go, because the
chat was indeed mental talk to the fucking party. You're
on a podcast. He's here. What are you watching? He's
he's hearing for watching some who was it? Why are
you Melvin Mainhoff versus black brock Larsan was madness? Turn

(57:05):
that off? Now we're on a podcast now that we
don't do any test we get the sound correct, well,
I can tell you I'm looking at the sound waves
there now and the gain is looking powerful.

Speaker 9 (57:16):
What does actually gain mean?

Speaker 1 (57:19):
Gain means you turn up the volume on the device,
so you push the signal higher, so basically you have
your standard volume and gain means it's an extra booster button. Exactly.
That is exactly it. That is exactly it sound to eleven? Yes, right.

(57:41):
So we're now in Adelaide. We've been here for about
four days. We we enjoyed Dubai. Dubai was sound. I
tried to get yourself and the cowboy down. We went
to the beach, had a swim, seeing the fancy seven
star restaurant that was shaped after a yacht where Michael Owen, Oh,
look down there, let's go in this helicopter. We've seen

(58:05):
that hotel. And then after the boys were like, Steve
was like, I'm going home. I'm tired toasting here. Was like, oh, Mike,
we'll go see the bush leave tomorrow, man, we go see.
I was like, we're not going to see that tomorrow.
Let's face it, we are not going to see that tomorrow.
And was I right?

Speaker 4 (58:22):
You were correct? Yes?

Speaker 1 (58:23):
You were? So what did I do?

Speaker 9 (58:25):
You walked about what fifteen.

Speaker 1 (58:27):
K yes, and I had no idea where the fucking
thing was. But to be fair, it's kind of hard
to miss because the world's biggest buildings. It's like the
spire on top of a s angel dust and the
best steroids that brock lesnar ever found. So here's the thing. Yeah,

(58:47):
I walked all the way there and it's it's one
of those cities where it's there's a motorway going right
the way through, so you have to. It's kind of
difficult to walk, but I got there. And I tell
you one thing about Dubai. I was in rest with
the place. Sure it was built on slave labor, yes,
however there was no crime, No like homeless moors knocking

(59:08):
around and this isn't the dig people who are homeless
and no, man, I'm not like. But obviously they've either
been fucked off into the desert or there's enough wedge there.
I don't know what the crack is. It's a strange place,
very yeah. I mean, there's just it's just there's no
one's messing about. It felt a bit fickle though, oh yeah,

(59:29):
there was an awful lot of people who were It.

Speaker 5 (59:31):
Felt very fickle. It just felt kind of maybe I
wasn't there long enough to experience, but it felt tad
bit soulless.

Speaker 1 (59:39):
What was your general It was lovely.

Speaker 9 (59:41):
Like it was a lovely spotted It looked like it
was all the mod cons. You got burnt man, I
told you that's burnt. I got some stuff, give you.

Speaker 1 (59:51):
Ernica, Ernica. You put it on.

Speaker 9 (59:55):
But it just felt a bit soulless, felt a bit right.

Speaker 1 (59:59):
That that's Europe, that's that's just my opinion.

Speaker 9 (01:00:01):
I don't take that as standard. But I was only
there for a few days.

Speaker 1 (01:00:04):
But there's a good few quid to be made out there, man,
and I would mind. I was talking to the neighbor
there in Sweden. He's got a g wagon. I was like,
fuck me, man, the size of that, and he was like, yeah,
six fifty horsepower by turbo fucking sound job V eight.

Speaker 9 (01:00:20):
They're basically I like the Nissan Micron.

Speaker 1 (01:00:23):
Yeah, and to buy yeah, pretty much. I've seen about
two hundred of them in one day. That's not a
big deal over there. Lamborghini's the whole lot.

Speaker 9 (01:00:31):
Overall.

Speaker 1 (01:00:32):
I enjoyed it. The drink was astronomically expensive, and the
the food was fairly well priced. It's clean. I didn't
I didn't feel unsafe at any time, and I quite
enjoyed that. Then what happened after that? We left to
buy and we had a recapints well, I did surprise surprise.
On the way out, we ended up meeting some sound

(01:00:55):
couple from the UK and they brought a director and
an ex Rugby lions lading.

Speaker 9 (01:01:01):
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:01:02):
Mike Phillips, fucking sound dude man, great jaw line man.
We're talking about jaw lines. But that man, you could
you could cut you could cut marble on that lad's
jaw line straight side of like, look at that jaw line, man,
look at the jaw line. So that was good. Enjoyed that.
Now you're probably thinking all the boys are drinking. We're
actually drinking to think called first crasher. Yeah, first crasher,

(01:01:26):
so original lemon. Now artificial colors are flyvers. So we
took itself and the cowboy had a few looseners, and
then when we got to the airport, it was this
Dubai airport is massive. It's like it's like going into
the minds of Maria from Lord of the Rings. But
the lights are on and there's no ballot rog Maybe

(01:01:47):
maybe there is a baller rug and he's fucking locked
up in a dungeon.

Speaker 9 (01:01:51):
Charge the extra for your bags at rug.

Speaker 1 (01:01:55):
Oh, that did indeed crush the thirst. So yeah, we
met this lad called Richard and he was like, the
bastard fucking want had charged me three hundred and forty euro.

Speaker 5 (01:02:06):
He thought he was doing a good job. First he
thought he was doing a good job because he narrowed
the price down a bit.

Speaker 1 (01:02:11):
Yeah, yeah, forty euro and then something he need to
charge you at all?

Speaker 4 (01:02:15):
That?

Speaker 1 (01:02:16):
Well he did. I think it was a bit of
a fucking con job gimmick, but look at we won't
let that take the the taste out of the mouth.
So then we took a plane to Kohala Lumper and
the turbulence was horrifying. I love Urbulece. Yeah, he loves
the mad prick. And all I could think about was
the story he told us about when he was in
the States man tell that story.

Speaker 9 (01:02:35):
So it was in the States. I was like, coming
back from the States and going to the.

Speaker 5 (01:02:38):
States playing handball, and I sent to my buddy in
the queue lining.

Speaker 9 (01:02:42):
Up, I go, I hope there's gonna be a load
of turbulence. I hope there's going to be a load.

Speaker 1 (01:02:46):
I love it.

Speaker 9 (01:02:47):
He was like, what's rouchy you mad?

Speaker 8 (01:02:49):
I was like crack like.

Speaker 5 (01:02:50):
Hecause you're not worried.

Speaker 9 (01:02:51):
I go, yeah, I'm worried. What kind of adds to
the feared?

Speaker 1 (01:02:53):
You know what I mean?

Speaker 9 (01:02:54):
Like roller coaster?

Speaker 5 (01:02:55):
And then all of a sudden the turbulence started, and
I was like, this old American couple beside me, why
did you wish for?

Speaker 1 (01:03:01):
This?

Speaker 9 (01:03:01):
Is your fault?

Speaker 1 (01:03:03):
Because if you control and it was like got.

Speaker 5 (01:03:06):
Really bad and people. I was like, but the turners
in coming to Kuala Lumpa from Dubai to Kuala Lumpa
was quite It was up there with the worst turbulence ever.

Speaker 1 (01:03:19):
Yeah, And I was like looking at I was looking
at him because of that story he told about and
I was looking at him, going but like himself and
Stevie were just mellow, and I was like, why am
I the only one is fucking ship it? And then
the pair you did get a bit. There was a
couple of gas.

Speaker 9 (01:03:38):
Yeahah, of course I'm not gonna lie.

Speaker 1 (01:03:40):
I was.

Speaker 9 (01:03:40):
There was a few moments where it's like, you know,
they get the drop and I was like.

Speaker 1 (01:03:45):
Oh yeah, yeah. I think I was saying a few
prayers myself. Man. It's funny how when when everything's going
really well, you kind of you forget to say the
prayers and you're like it's all made up out stuff.
But then when when you're you know to say, there's
no there's no atheist in the foxhole, man, I tell
you what thing. I was embracing all the stuffs. Yeah,

(01:04:09):
but thank god we got back. Everyone made it. And
then that the flight was delayed by what fucking two hours?
So then the flight then to the connecting then Passar
Airport and Bally, yes that was Noquala lumper to Bally.
Then was was also late because the guy on the
runway fucking wouldn't leave for an hour.

Speaker 9 (01:04:29):
Not a guy in the room with the pilot.

Speaker 1 (01:04:30):
Sorry the pilot. There wasn't a guy on the runway
going and doing your man and and squared in front
of the tank like tanks very much for that, No.

Speaker 5 (01:04:39):
He was. The pilot was just on the runway for
like an hour an hour and a half, and I
fell asleep, and I was like.

Speaker 1 (01:04:45):
I got asleep as well, fair playing myself and be
wonder here we we bought those travel pillows because I
was like, right, that's it. I'm definitely and I went
to Boots and got a really fancy one from Dublin
Airport com paid thirty euros.

Speaker 9 (01:04:58):
There's only five percent crushed lemons in this drink.

Speaker 1 (01:05:02):
The rest is just sugar, yes, and tears, but.

Speaker 9 (01:05:06):
You're not sugar down again in moderation no harm.

Speaker 1 (01:05:11):
Even moderation moderation no harm exactly. So we're on we're
on yield at the airport time when we got in,
got the cushions, I had a good kip and I
woke up and I was like, was I it was
one of those kIPS that like you fell asleep for
like five minutes, but it felt like an hour. And
then the last like, no, you're actually sleeping a good
while there, and the pilot didn't go anywhere and you

(01:05:34):
sleep for like an hour and a half.

Speaker 5 (01:05:35):
And I was like, why did they let you on
the plane, let us on the plane so early?

Speaker 1 (01:05:40):
If that was the kids, I don't know, Man, it
has traffic issues, you know what I mean. We we
kind of assumed that they know what they're doing with
with ground control. Yeah, but there's also you know, there's
unforeseen circumstances like the cleaners might have been slower, or
maybe one of the planes change. It's an unforeseen diagnostical
issue that the rose so they might have don't tell

(01:06:04):
your diarrhea. When I was over waiting to hear this one,
I'll tell you. So we got we went we were
in Ballely and I remember saying to.

Speaker 5 (01:06:11):
By the way, we had to book another flight because
we mistair a connecting flight to Adelaide.

Speaker 1 (01:06:18):
Earlier on when when we landed in ballein we felt,
you know, funnily enough, I met Bono back in two
thousand and two, me and a friend of mine, j Petrou,
and he was looking for gigs around Dublin and I said,
come on, we're going to the back of the Clarence Hotel.
Maybe Bono's in. Sure enough, there was Bono. We went
up and we spoke to him and he was asking
me where I was from, and he asked where Jay
was from. Jay was from Newcastle in Australia and Bally

(01:06:38):
and he goes, Bally, I was there last week. Great
smell out of the place. And we looked at each other,
what about And then when we arrived, I was like,
that's what Bonno meant. Stevie said, it's it smelt like
turtle tank.

Speaker 9 (01:06:51):
Turtle tank.

Speaker 1 (01:06:52):
Yeah, that kind of liked kind of Bertilian smell.

Speaker 9 (01:06:56):
But then there was nice smells as well.

Speaker 5 (01:06:57):
There was nice smells in between a lot of street
dog Yeah, there's a lot of streets, so.

Speaker 1 (01:07:01):
I said, I said top here. I was like, it
would be nice, it would be nice to have a
night in Balley. And we had a nice and a
day and I went into the we went into the
sea for swim. What was the water temperature like that? Man?

Speaker 9 (01:07:14):
You could, I'd say it was above tipped above tepper.

Speaker 1 (01:07:19):
It's like when you've been in the bath and it's
just like.

Speaker 9 (01:07:21):
It's just started to cool off, started to cool off.

Speaker 1 (01:07:23):
You know, you've got a little bit of time left
until you have to put the old Either get the
fuck out of the bath or run the tap to.

Speaker 9 (01:07:29):
You turn the top tap on with your tools, you
know what I mean.

Speaker 8 (01:07:34):
So how do you like Australia? So fair?

Speaker 9 (01:07:35):
That's your second.

Speaker 1 (01:07:36):
Time Australia, second time day? And and the mine it's Adelaide's
a funny spot. It's a lot very like Phoenix in Arizona,
very spread out, large wide avenues and blocks. I met
an old college friend of mine last night, Wendy, nice
girl fucking into the hard rock always was a sound doll.

(01:07:56):
And after we met her, then we had to leave abruptly,
and then I was feeling a bit melancholic. I felt
like we left too quickly. And then we're walking across
the bridge and then Stevie ended up meeting some Bogains
and we got into a bit of a scrap. Stevie
Fair Foxs and we gave him a uppercut, and your
man was like, oh, you might hits like a bitch.

(01:08:17):
And our manager was like, here, you're the one who's
fucking busted up, man. And then one of the girl,
one of the girls ran up and hit Stevie. One
of the girlfriends ran up and hit Stevie from behind
across the face, and this sound shield maiden of an
Aussie woman who was in the bar with us, she's like,
do you know these guys. I was like, no, no idea,
Like they're just fucking sharing to fight with us. She's like, right,

(01:08:40):
just just just go well, we'll we'll slam down, just
get ahead of here. And I was like, fair playde you.
And then the girl ran up to try and give
Stevie another shot, and then your one just fucking launches her.
She lands on her arse and she gets up and
she's like, you don't fucking dug a girl like that.
She's like, leave alone, what's dog a girl? Then just
fucking push her on the ground like that. So you

(01:09:01):
want to look like she was into a bit of
maybe a bit of crossfish like she was. She fucking leveled.
She said twice. Yeah, so fair player to Ethan the manager.
He was the two bogans are like, where the fucking
fight them? Fair player to the cowboy was like, come on, Saw,
you can't and he'd take the pair of them, and

(01:09:21):
there's there's a lot of lads grabbing each other by
the throat and bouncers and stuff, and I was like,
I kind of learned my lesson from fighting and bouncers.
But now, as my mantra is, if there's any troublesome situations,
it's de escalate, evacuate and and if there's no if
there's no way out, retaliate. Yes, that's my I made

(01:09:43):
those rules up so they're good rules.

Speaker 5 (01:09:45):
And the rhyme when the scrap broke out, the ruckus
or the free or whatever you want to call it,
Yeah it broke out. These kind of men started coming
out of the woodwork, look like creatures coming out.

Speaker 1 (01:10:01):
They were like the insects in the pit of Peter
Jackson's King Kong movie with those worms and all the beatles.

Speaker 5 (01:10:08):
They just came out of the water woodwork, and obviously
their eyes were just very exciting, exciting.

Speaker 9 (01:10:13):
You could tell they wanted to get involved as well.

Speaker 1 (01:10:15):
They were like, oh yeah, let's have a fucking knuckle ub.

Speaker 8 (01:10:19):
Crazy.

Speaker 9 (01:10:19):
How people love fighting. Yeah, like, we're too old for
that crack.

Speaker 1 (01:10:23):
Now middle aged hunksman receiving hairlines, I mean, your hairline
is gone.

Speaker 9 (01:10:29):
I could grow it.

Speaker 1 (01:10:30):
Up, you could do, but fuck that, man, We'll all
go to Turkey and get the hair transplants on.

Speaker 9 (01:10:35):
We're too old for that fighting crack.

Speaker 5 (01:10:36):
And if anybody's listening there as well, just walk away
from trouble if you can.

Speaker 1 (01:10:39):
Oh yeah, I mean, look at the end of the day,
you know, they say it takes the bigger man to
walk away and all that. You know, at the end
of the day. Look, it's not fucking worth Like those
boys could have been left in hospital. One of us
could have been left in jail and or hospital. Who
knows how the fun would have happened.

Speaker 9 (01:10:55):
Somebody might have got bombed.

Speaker 1 (01:10:56):
There could have been bummings going on. So they speaking
of coming that. We were listening back to the segment
there with the the TikTok lad who was given out
and all that is going to be on the same
on the same podcast.

Speaker 5 (01:11:10):
What happened was there was a technical issue and so
this podcast has been recorded in three countries over the
course of three weeks.

Speaker 9 (01:11:18):
Basically, we recorded a lot and there was a lot
of information.

Speaker 5 (01:11:21):
And it all got lost were my audio wasn't very good,
so we said we don't.

Speaker 1 (01:11:26):
Worry man, I'd fix that, and postman, don't worry about that.

Speaker 9 (01:11:29):
What you said, but hopefully hopefully you do.

Speaker 1 (01:11:32):
That's like three completely different flavors to this podcast.

Speaker 5 (01:11:36):
At the time, when you did the voice for Hardy
Books episode what was it King in the Town?

Speaker 1 (01:11:43):
Do not to Deceive Me? And I was like, what
you whose job was it to fucking mix this? It
was like Peter Danley's what is Boss? Maybe you don't
hurt me? Stand clear? Stores up the background.

Speaker 9 (01:12:00):
So basically there was you Eddie's character in yourself.

Speaker 1 (01:12:05):
I mean, we're breaking the fourth Yes it's me Martin Maloney, Right, Okay,
be happy everyone. I was doing this character. It's too
confusing for us because with thick cunts. All right, you
were playing this anyway? Yeah, yeah, Eddie man, Yeah, blame
myself man, Yeah, you fucked.

Speaker 4 (01:12:23):
Anyway.

Speaker 9 (01:12:23):
You had one job anyway, you owed this Russian dude.

Speaker 1 (01:12:27):
Money, Ukrainian heavy dude speaking Ukrainians. Now worst did you
say thank you? You know, well you're doing of course
the thank you are your people in bed shape you're
dying your diat man. That was that. We woke up
to that this morning. Then I have to say it
was very entertaining. It was just to see like heads
of state talking like it's lads in the pub, you

(01:12:50):
know what I mean? And that was that was fucking
fascinating stuff. But yeah, big boris, Big Big boris.

Speaker 9 (01:12:58):
There was a character in the box club bars.

Speaker 1 (01:13:00):
Played by the Dragon's dad, big Bigger hands of myself man.

Speaker 9 (01:13:04):
And he owed him money.

Speaker 1 (01:13:07):
And the voice, the skyline.

Speaker 9 (01:13:08):
Voice you use, the voice you were doing, the voice
that tried to joke.

Speaker 5 (01:13:14):
And as a placeholder to say we'll fix that and
post yes, it never got fixed.

Speaker 1 (01:13:20):
And never got fixed. And when it came to air,
I was like, what the fuck is going on here?

Speaker 9 (01:13:25):
But listen, maybe that was just our pit peep. Maybe
it was grand was.

Speaker 1 (01:13:28):
Here's the thing. When we were filming this, the smash
Hill smash hit very low budget, never appreciated by Artie
because they never they'd rather give money off the fucking
pat short fucking character jobs keep or more money for
some fucking panel show bollocks. IM not, But it's just

(01:13:49):
I'm not remember what what what did the grudges by two?

Speaker 9 (01:13:54):
Calculate what you will will not tolerate?

Speaker 1 (01:13:57):
Desperate to control Scarlet letter negativity. Doo doo do do
do Do Do Do Do Do do Jenny Jenny kind
of down seven sense there'd be two fans listen to this.

(01:14:21):
Now I can't believe it. They've listened. They've ruined my
favorite band. Because I'm a Tool fan. You have to
be a certain breed of class count to listen to
Tool Tool. We're playing and fucking Stockholm there a couple
of years ago over COVID and they were like, everybody
has to sit down for this. Wow. The thing is like, look, Tool,
they're fucking great musicians, but it's it's the it's the

(01:14:43):
fandom that surrounds Tool that I'm like, why do you
have to be so fucking aloof? Do you know what
I mean? Like, do you think some forty one would
be like anyone worse morewomp coming, you know, or like
fucking Pantera or someone.

Speaker 5 (01:14:58):
Like I suppose that's just like comparing like those carry
On films to like The Godfather, you.

Speaker 1 (01:15:04):
Know what I mean? All Right? Okay, alright, like panter Man,
they're fucking solid man. Woo Woo actually went to Plantera
a couple of weeks ago and I was fucking class.
Took my daughter there first concert ship I went to,
and I was like, what do you think of that?
She was like, I was amazing. I was like, damn

(01:15:25):
right when she was when she was a baby. Man,
when when she was about like six months old, I've
shed been the old baby carrier and I just have
like Pantera blasting swinging around the house and she loved it.
So come full circle now, CONTs.

Speaker 9 (01:15:42):
So we're doing her first gig in Australia tonight.

Speaker 1 (01:15:47):
Yeah, it's in a shed.

Speaker 9 (01:15:48):
Apparently it's an Irish center, so it should be good crack.

Speaker 1 (01:15:52):
We're like Aslan, We'll play anywhere, man, so.

Speaker 9 (01:15:55):
It should be good crack. You're gonna play a few tunes.

Speaker 1 (01:15:58):
We're gonna have a good a few go to the
in and out burger. Yeah, big suppose. I just thought
it'd be important just to kind of because a lot
of people ask me what the what's the story of
the podcast, and it has indeed been climbing the charts,
and uh, look, I said to myself this year the

(01:16:19):
podcast is going back and I as as Owen Rull's
character and intermission says, I shit you not, as they're
saying the states, I will get this to number one
in the Irish podcast charts. But listen, I need you
people out there, the loyal listeners, to fucking spread the
word man, And this is Monell supplements. You mean, like

(01:16:44):
like Alex Jones and Luke Udowski like chopped.

Speaker 5 (01:16:49):
Up tons or something and say it's good for your
your kerotin levels, your vitamin beach welve.

Speaker 1 (01:16:55):
Uh you know, I don't know, Like, look, I'll sell
something if I genuinely believe that product is good. Like
I remember I once like my first uh foray into
the sales world was when I was nineteen out in
eos I made Sasha. He had a lot of really
shite jewelry that his girlfriend had robbed Mclair's accessories in
Oslo and it was shite, man, so he put it

(01:17:18):
on He put it on the front of a dog
cage and he goes, good, go down there, yeah and
solo jewelry. We need the money, so the jewelry for
the dogs. And I was just like stopping people on
the beach, going sorry, do you want to buy any
of this? Shite did you can just tell any of it?

(01:17:38):
Probably about like tenors worth of people who were so
entertained by the candor and honesty of the sales pitch
that they were like, yeah, sound your your funny bastard,
so we'll buy it. But no. So but if I
was to sell something like Audi's you know what I mean, tell.

Speaker 9 (01:17:55):
The listeners about Sia and adventures in Greece.

Speaker 1 (01:17:58):
Uh that we leave that for the next episode. And
that's also like it didn't happen to Look, look, it
is what it is. Man. You know I'm talking to
you O voice now, you know what I mean. It's
kind of like it's convenient and there's the yah, yeah,
you know what I mean. So listen, we're gonna we're
gonna leave it there for now. I'm gonna get this up.
It should be Saturday where you are now, so if

(01:18:18):
you're having a little drive, you're probably the end of it.
So there's no point saying, oh, I hope I have
a good time. I hope you've listened to it, have
a good Sunday. And yeah, you know, I'm gonna when
I get back from the travels, it's gonna be a full,
full force with the podcast. So I'm sorry. There's just
been a lot of stuff. We didn't bring a fucking
adapter either to get one, so yeah, we will. We

(01:18:42):
will be back, but I hope you enjoyed listen to this.
This this podcast actually has been recorded over three separate continents.

Speaker 9 (01:18:51):
Yeah, it's crazy.

Speaker 5 (01:18:52):
It's crazy. Like the first podcast you did, it was
interested in. The second podcast was very interesting. This one
is a nice little melon.

Speaker 8 (01:19:03):
What's the word I was looking for? There you go,

(01:19:32):
Oh god, that's.

Speaker 9 (01:19:37):
Funny, that's funny.

Speaker 1 (01:19:38):
Oh gosh, Well you see Friddian slip the ship, show
your secret fridge. We've been watching Sopranos here in the
hotel as well. I have to say, man, it's brilliant.
It's one of the best seasons series ever. I mean
some of my favorite characters fill the Atar door and
h and Johnny Sack. I mean, it's just I'm not

(01:19:59):
a s this minting, but my estimation of Jazz Scremoni
is a man, just fucking plummeted.

Speaker 9 (01:20:04):
It's one of the best episodes ever.

Speaker 8 (01:20:06):
I don't think anything can.

Speaker 1 (01:20:07):
Rival it, not even the Irish low budget comedy series.
So I have to say a lot of a lot
of the things that we we based Tommy Boo's character
Polly Wallers, and Tommy Boo is a bit like Polly Wallers. Right,
we leave you off now, a fair player torch team

(01:20:27):
for hopping in here, you can hop in the next one.
I tell you one thing. You're a great co host.

Speaker 8 (01:20:31):
Cheers man, cheers, cheers.

Speaker 1 (01:20:33):
You're a great cohort like the guy that.

Speaker 5 (01:20:36):
Just gets calls some plays, said your rogan, who are
a color comminator?

Speaker 1 (01:20:41):
You know the guy that's oh you mean on the UFC,
meant the podcast that everyone listens to all the time.

Speaker 8 (01:20:48):
What all right, guys, best.

Speaker 1 (01:20:51):
Look, look and good bless and remember spread the word
and if you like this, throw a fucking few quid
at the old paper four slash Monny's digest. Do you
know what I mean? Like I I won't say no
to a touch, good look and good bless Much love
to you all, Take care m hm.