Episode Transcript
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(00:03):
Hi, my name's Yanni. I'm an Aboriginal peer support
worker at Headspace Adelaide. I'd like to acknowledge that the
land we operate from and a meeting on right now is the land
of the Ghana people. I pay my respects to their
Elders, past, present and future, and acknowledge
Headspace's commitment to makinga positive contribution to young
people who are Aboriginal. Hi everybody and welcome back to
(00:30):
Headspace Sessions Podcast Adelaide.
My name is Ali and as always, I am joined by two of our
fabulous. Co hosts.
Beth and Santi, we are coming toyou with a really timely topic
for the end of the year. We are going to be chatting all
(00:51):
things burnout. I'm sure you've all had this
term before, whether you've experienced yourself or you've
watched other people scramble around you because they have
been feeling it this December orwhatever time of year it kind of
gets to you. We're going to be chatting
everything that comes with burnout.
So we, we really want to talk about what burn burnout feels
(01:15):
like for people, what it might look like in your life and what
you can do to reset when you reach that point.
Burnout is so common, way more common than people think, and
especially for young people aged12 to 25, which is that age that
Headspace supports directly. As always, we have a very fun
(01:36):
icebreaker that our lovely lead script developer Jamie and Adam
brought to us for this episode, so they really want to know from
us, and maybe it's something that you can reflect on as well
while you're listening to this episode.
If you could remove just one stressor, just one from your
week, what would it be and why? It's not a fun one, but.
(02:01):
I mean, what stresses are fun? True.
I think it's what people expect from me.
OK, There's only so much someonecan do, and then when people
expect you to go beyond that andexert yourself even more, which
leads to burnout, just doesn't do it for me I guess.
No, I don't think it does it foranybody.
(02:22):
Expectations. How about you, Beth?
Deciding what to eat every day. Yes, meals and like 7 days of
the week. There's a lot.
Half the time I just end up eating the same thing.
That's like a comfort meal, and then that's just because it's
too hard to. Yeah, You know what?
(02:47):
I'm so brought Glad you brought this up because I literally
think about this every single day.
I think about how overwhelming it feels to for the rest of our
life, every day for three times a day, we have to decide what we
want to eat. That is a terrifying thought to
(03:07):
me. I don't know, obviously to Beth
as well. Do you feel that?
Sometimes, yeah. OK, well, I think it's the same
with clothes as well. With what clothes?
Trying to figure. Out what to wear.
You stole mine, so that was thatwas mine.
Mine was getting dressed. Oh my God, if I could remove
like not obviously like not wearing clothes, like would
ideally like to wear clothes, but it's more so deciding what
(03:29):
to wear and it's like just changing in general, especially
in winter. My God, if I could say my
dressing gown all day every day,I would.
But sometimes knowing that I like have to come out of the
shower and then I like want to put my dressing gown on and then
I have to think about what I need to wear for the day and
then get into those clothes. Oh, please.
(03:50):
That honestly sounds like a nightmare.
And it is a nightmare. So that's mine.
That's what I would take out of the week.
It's getting dressed. But it's OK, we will.
We will wear clothes for you. Yes, we should definitely work.
We should definitely make clothes.
Those are the public announcement.
Well, perfect. Thank you guys for once again
(04:13):
answering our ice breaker with very different, very different
answers. We've come with this time, but
that just shows the diversity that we have on this panel all
the time. So I love it.
I love you guys's vibes that youbring.
Anyway, we are really intrigued to be talking about burnout
today. I say intrigued because I feel
(04:37):
like you might know what it comes with, but for everybody,
it can look and feel so differently and I think that's
what we really want to get to. The nitty gritty of today is
what burnout actually can look like for somebody.
But before we get into that, let's talk about what burnout
actually is. So burnout isn't just about
(04:59):
being tired or stressed, like everybody gets stressed.
Everybody has those stresses. Day-to-day Burnout is what
happens when your mind and your body have just been running on
empty for so long. It is that consistent stress and
exhaustion that you feel. I like to think of it as though
(05:21):
your battery has almost hit 1% and it's just refusing to take
charge. You know, when your battery just
like, well, your phone just getsthat level.
You just doesn't want to charge anymore and you're like, OK, I
have to get a new phone, but that's expensive.
So sometimes that can happen to us.
We just don't maybe have the resources to know, like, how to
(05:42):
correctly charge back up our battery.
And so we have to think about new ways of doing that.
And hopefully we will talk aboutthat today.
But yeah, that is unfortunately what burnout can look like for
some people, and for young people especially, burnout can
come from so many directions at one time, whether that's school,
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social media, work, expectationslike Santi mentioned, family,
and just wider comparison withinfriendships and relationships.
So many, so many, the whole lot.And over time, that pressure can
build up until you really just hit a point where things that
(06:23):
used to feel really manageable for you just suddenly feel
absolutely impossible. I'm really interested to hear
from you guys if you've ever felt this way about anything
that I'm kind of sharing about what burnout might look like or
be. Have you guys ever related to to
that feeling? Yes, yeah, definitely.
(06:46):
This entire year I have been going up and down in the burnout
cycle. I'm currently going down in the
burnout burnout cycle. Down as in like down you're
feeling more impacted by it or? OK, Yeah.
It's been a big year, and as someone who is also
neurodivergent and also lives with endometriosis as well, my
(07:10):
burnouts are very big and full on like, and a lot of things
happen, like my pain for my endowill flare up and I'll also just
be an emotional mess, very tiredeven if I sleep 10 hours.
So it's definitely very relevant.
(07:31):
Yeah and yeah. So you almost like with these
added pressures and things that you're living with, you almost
need to be way more like hyper vigilant of how burnout can
impact you and maybe what it looks like specifically for you
so you can get on top of it. Yeah.
Way quicker, yeah. That's one thing that I've
(07:52):
learnt over the years and that I'm continuing to learn.
Yeah. Is noticing the little subtle
signs that it's like, OK, I needto step back.
I need to rest now and so hopefully eventually I yeah,
better at noticing that, but. I mean.
It is the end of the year, too. It is the end of the year, yeah.
And that's also like I, I, I canrelate to that as well.
(08:15):
You know, I'm as somebody who lives with many of the same
experiences that you do, I find that when people talk about
burnout, they often talk about it being like just an end of the
year thing. And I know that, you know, I
mentioned it and you know, beingDecember, that's very typical.
But for a lot of people living with those added pressures and
(08:36):
living with chronic illness, it can be an all year round thing
And it just, it might come out of nowhere or it might not come
because of school or work. It can just kind of be because
we're just kind of exist and it's just a little bit harder
for us to exist day-to-day. So it's just, yeah, really
trying to be vigilant about those small things before they
(08:59):
blow up into this big thing thatwe call burnout can be really
tricky. Yeah.
Yeah. What about you, Santi?
I think in towards the end of the year it's been really
chaotic, yeah, just because one,I'm graduating, so yeah.
I mean, congratulations on graduating.
(09:19):
Big, big, big moment. But yeah, just trying to figure
out where I fit in and also jumpjungling those.
What am I saying? Jungle.
You're thinking about the tree behind you.
Sorry. Yeah.
Just trying to figure out where I fit in and seeing what
(09:43):
societal expectations are just because in my culture you've got
family, extended family. Just expecting so much.
And then, yeah, just trying to make sure, OK, these are the
things that I need to do. But then there's only so much I
can get done. And coming to the end of the
year, it's OK. Now I've reached this point,
(10:06):
Where am I going from that? And then I just start
overthinking, overthinking, overthinking.
And yeah, that just leads me to burning out, just closing myself
off from everyone. Yeah.
And yeah, it's. So it's almost like you get to
the end of the year and you havethis checklist of things that
maybe you have wanted to accomplish by this time or you
(10:26):
know, things that you're reflecting on for the new year,
and it just becomes incredibly overwhelming.
It sounds like if. If I haven't achieved some stuff
by at times like. Those expectations you were
talking? About.
Yeah. And then you start to feel that
pressure. OK, yeah, I've fallen behind.
(10:48):
Now I just got to catch up. And then it just keeps
burdening. Yeah.
Plus uni itself was kind of chaotic as well.
Hectic last semester, making sure I don't fail.
Yeah. Staying up all those late
nights. I feel like that's such a common
experience for young people. And that's, you know, why I
talked about it being really like normal this time of the
(11:08):
year to maybe experience burnoutmore than other months of the
year because we have those addedexpectations or we're really
like reflecting on the year and being like, oh, well, I didn't
get around to doing this. But then there's so much that I
still have to do. And then there's just that sense
of overwhelm and doom, and it just can become.
(11:29):
It doesn't help when. So I work in the retail sector.
Supermarket doesn't help when you've got to put a fake smile.
Yeah, welcome customers. And then also keep that.
Yeah. Keep yourself not trying to show
that burnout. Yeah.
And you know, you've got managers just making sure you
perform well. And if you don't, you get called
out. So it's not fun.
(11:52):
I am always in admiration of retail workers this time of
year. Don't know how you do it, but Oh
my goodness, you keep our society alive, that's for sure.
We kind of mentioned maybe some little things about noticing
those, those maybe everyday changes that can build up and
(12:15):
become what we call burnout. Some of these key signs may look
like, you know, you're just starting to become tired for no
reason. Maybe you're finding it really
hard to concentrate at work or at school.
Maybe you're feeling so overwhelmed that you don't have
the time to spend with your family and friends like you once
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did in the beginning of the year.
And or maybe you're having trouble sleeping just because
there's so much going on. There's so much to think about.
How do we personally recognize the point when we're not just
stressed, but we're actually burning out?
I think for me, it's when I stopeating, OK, I'm going to bed
(12:57):
like at 4:00 AM in the morning. And then just I'm really
talkative socially, Yeah, but yeah, people.
So when you're quiet, we're like, we've got to be worried.
Yeah, so at work they'd be askedlike, you know what you use
yourself. And I'm like, yeah, just been.
I'm just burnt. I openly say I'm burnt out.
(13:19):
Like, like, there's only so muchI can take and do.
Yeah. And also, you know, distancing
myself, like, that'd be. I usually talk to my mom daily.
And that'd be times when I won'ttalk to her for a month.
Yeah. So that's when I know, OK.
And then my mom starts messagingme, are you all right?
And that's when I know, OK, I'm just, I need to pick myself back
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up. Yeah.
So that's when I start working myself towards.
Yeah. Yeah, I'll pay you, Beth.
Yeah. I think I'm I'm similar to
Santi. It's a lot of like if I have
this sense of whole body exhaustion, like I wake up, I
just wake up, I'm up for an hourand then I'm like, I'm exhausted
again, Like I need to go back tobed.
(14:01):
That sort of sense of fatigue. But then also the not feeling
like I can talk. Like, it doesn't feel like I
have the energy or the ability to have a conversation with
someone or tolerate someone elsein my just around me.
But I also can get, I can get more anxious, more emotional
(14:23):
upset over the smallest things. Like it's like it's just a big
shift. Very overwhelming.
Sort of, yeah. And I think something I've
noticed is when you lose interest on stuff that you
really love doing. Definitely.
I know I've hit that, but rock bottom when I don't like to go
do fencing, yeah. And it's like, and fencing's a
big one for you, yeah. And yeah, the past, what was it,
(14:46):
2 months? I didn't rock up for practice
because I was stressed out with uni exams.
I've got to apply for a new visaas well, so trying to figure
those out, yeah. And it's, it's So what like
ironic, isn't it, that like we stop doing those things that we
really enjoy, yet when we do those things, it helps prevent
(15:07):
those things. So it's just this really weird
cycle. But it's really good that we can
become aware of those really specific things, like, OK, if I
don't go to training or if I don't reach out to mom, if I've
become more emotional, like I think I need to like, get on top
of that. I can definitely relate.
I feel like I'm someone who, as we kind of mentioned in previous
(15:31):
episodes, mask a lot. And that obviously takes a lot
of energy. And so when I'm getting to the
point of being burnt out, I don't have the ability to mask
as much as I do. So I just kind of start noticing
a lot, and it's kind of nice. I start noticing myself a lot
more in conversations, but sometimes that can come across
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as, like, irritability or maybe more emotion then I maybe wish
that there was. And so people are like, oh,
like, start showing. Are you OK?
And I'm like, well, yeah, I'm being myself, but I'm also just
like a little bit more irritable.
When I start showing irritable, yeah, facial expressions, that's
when people are like, OK, that'sdefinitely something going.
(16:13):
On Yeah. Yeah, that's definitely me.
It's irritability. And so then I'll just end up
being in my room, in the dark, in bed, just trying to relax and
it's like the slashes thing willlike annoy me and.
I'll be like, yeah. And I'm not like an outward,
like, projector or I could neverbe angry at anybody.
Like, no matter how terrible they were to me.
(16:35):
I'll just internalize it until I'm alone and burnt out,
especially in the car. My road rage comes out so bad.
That is where I externalize my anger.
Like, I'm so sorry if you're just, like, a lovely little
grandma walking across the road.If you're walking across too
slow, I'm going to get so angry in my car.
But I'm going to do it in my car.
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I'm not going to do it to anybody.
So that's where I noticed myself.
I'm like, OK, maybe I'm just a bit stressed because I should
not be getting angry at this grandma right now.
Yeah. But hey, it's good that we're
aware of these things, right? So that's what burnout feels
like to us, but what actually gets us to that point?
That's what I really want to getto the bottom of today.
(17:18):
Why are so many young people burning out way earlier than
they should be? Burnout doesn't come from one
thing, as we just mentioned earlier, it can come from an
array of pressures. You might be studying full time,
you might be working, you might be trying to keep up socially,
managing all of those expectations that we mentioned.
(17:38):
But then there's also these other added factors such as
financial stress, and that's a massive 1 at the moment.
The cost of living in Australia is absurd at the moment and just
the pressure to have your life sorted at such a young age can
really make it hard for young people to just cope on a daily
(18:02):
basis. And it makes sense why we feel
so stretched thin. The constant online comparison,
busy schedules and the feeling that you need to be constantly
available can make it really hard for young people to switch
off at the moment. Do you think that young people
today? And I feel like this might be a
bit of an opinion topic. I feel like a lot of people just
(18:25):
discuss it a lot. Do you think that young people
today are juggling more than they previously did, so previous
generations did? Yes.
Yes, very quick dance that Santi.
Yeah. Why do you think that?
Because obviously I'm living alone, so I pretty much know
what that's about. Cost of living is high.
You know, stuff that on a weeklybasis I'd spend around $200 on
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groceries and coming working with a 24 hour work cap, it's
expecting you to pay rent, groceries, everything else.
It does start piling up. And then you've also got
university financial situations as well.
Coming from an international family, you've got to worry
(19:11):
about that as well. But yeah, I think previous
generations had it way too easy.I'm sorry, but that's just my
opinion. Like you've got people saying,
oh, you know, it it's so easy for you now, now that you've got
so much technology. But no, it's not.
Yeah, when you look at it reallyhard, It's it's it's completely
(19:35):
the opposite. Yeah.
Especially with cost of living just skyrocketing like on a
daily basis. Absolutely.
So yeah. And rental prices.
Oh. Don't even get me sorry on the
rent. I think yes, there's always
going to be societal expectations, but I feel like
people can watch you more now that there is social media
particularly, and there is stilla lot of bias and a lot of
(20:00):
issues within society thinking you need to go to uni, you need
to do these things. It's a bit hard because I feel
like back. A long time ago, I'm not sure
because I wasn't, I'm not wasn'taround, but like you could go do
a trade and it was OK. Whereas now a lot of people were
(20:24):
feeling like they need to go to university instead.
That's just something that I've seen.
But then people are having like,if you're from the country town,
you've got to afford to move, You've got to afford to live and
eat, But also these young peopleare going home from school and
that you're like 1314 year olds,10 year olds, and they're on
(20:46):
their phones the whole time. And I feel like I don't even
know where I'm going with this. I feel like that in itself is a
whole another thing of mental overload.
Yeah, in general, because. Oh, definitely.
You would be masking with what you're doing.
Like, if you are neurodivergent,you would be masking at home
(21:06):
when you're supposed to be resting because you're
constantly talking to people on your phone.
You're also comparing yourself because you're looking at social
media and seeing what everyone else is doing.
And you're not developing the skills of being able to be alone
and rely on yourself because you're constantly talking to
(21:27):
people as well. I don't know.
Yeah, it's a big like. I get it though, like there's
just so much more these days. And it's not to dismiss like
anybody who is older, like, you know, we, we still face similar
stresses, like we all face stress, right?
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But we just have this added digital age that just means that
we're constantly available to anybody, whether we like it or
not. And it also means we can access
a lot more, which feeds so much more comparison around where we
should be in our current life. And we're seeing people, you
(22:09):
know, our age buying houses and settling down and travelling
lots. And if you're not there at that
point in your life, it can be really overwhelming.
And then that can obviously feedthis, this burnout.
Do you find it hard to switch off because of so much of our
lives are online at the moment? Like what impact do you feel
(22:31):
like this has on your energy levels?
I used to when I was a teenager,I didn't have social media for a
while because I was quite anxious about it because.
Naturally, I. Wasn't around it really.
And then I got it and I was on it all the time.
Lots of comparison making, wouldget very upset if people didn't
(22:54):
reply to me was I became very reliant on it.
Yeah. And you could also see what all
your friends were doing without you and lots of different things
like that. So that in itself was a lot of
issues with social media. Yeah.
But then as I got older and I had other priorities, I haven't
relied on it as much. I've been able to kind of facet
(23:14):
that out. I was like, I need to go to the
grocery shops and I need to drive and I need to get stuff
done and I want to get home quickly, so I don't actually go
on my phone. It's definitely very addictive
and it's definitely very difficult to try and navigate
that if you're young. And I mean, a lot of it.
(23:36):
That's all people do these days.Yeah.
Is there on their phones. Like, don't get me wrong, I'm so
like grateful for social media in so many ways.
Oh my God. I say bring back the pigeons
because like, I just find it baffling that we are expected to
be available to anybody 24/7. Like the amount of people that I
(24:00):
know in my life. And I definitely like used to
feel this way when I would send a message or they would send me
a message and just that expectation that I would hear
from them within an hour. And if I didn't, then they were
a bad friend or vice versa. Which is absurd to think about.
Like we have lives and we have so much going on in our lives
(24:25):
and the fact that we need to respond to a message so timely
is is crazy to me. I think for me, it was the
opposite of Beth. This is when Instagram first
started. Yeah.
And we, like, I was a teenager and that was pretty much.
We never used it. Yeah.
Because, OK, we were in school and you met your friends, and I
(24:46):
think the only way we had socialmedia was WhatsApp.
Yeah. And that was just to talk about.
MSN. That was pretty much just to
talk about a movie we watched orwhat's our next outing gonna be?
Yeah. Or what are we going to do
during a break? Like, are we going to go play
football? Are we going to do this?
(25:06):
Yeah. And now it's the complete
opposite. Now I'm just on social media
24/7 because I've in my mind, I've developed that idea of
people are going to think wrong with me because I'm not
messaging them or getting back to them within the span of a
day. So yeah.
Yeah, it's really a terrible cycle, isn't it?
(25:28):
The big question here is what can we actually do when we are
burnt out and when we're noticing those things, or maybe
when we're feeling like this overwhelm of constantly being
available to people, What can wedo?
I think speak out, that's in my personal opinion, that's what I
usually do. But it it, it's really up to the
(25:49):
person. Yeah, but I usually call, call
out and say, hey, I'm burnt out.I'm not going to be like
emotionally available or like, physically available to do stuff
even like when I makes practice,people ask why aren't you coming
from practice? Yeah.
Like, sorry, I'm burned out. This is so much.
There's so much I've been doing.Yeah.
(26:10):
And OK, cool. That.
No, that. Thanks for telling us.
So that's one way that people can find out that you're burned
in and they can. So.
Yeah, just. Just saying it for what it is,
like saying hey guys, I'm actually just sober, yeah.
Right now. But then you've got certain
people that think it's a joke. Yeah.
It's like there's, there's not much going on for you to get
burnt out. It's like, no, there's for you
(26:34):
and me, it's completely different.
Yeah. So yeah, just call out.
Yeah, definitely reaching out and telling people exactly what
your feeling is one way that youcan definitely support yourself
during this time. Also, just creating boundaries
around your work and study, likemaybe not checking your emails
when you get home. This is always something I was
(26:56):
so guilty of. But as soon as you hit five,
like making sure those notifications are off.
And same with social media, likeputting screen time limits or
turning your color to black and white so it doesn't seem as like
fun to engage with or turning off your notifications.
(27:16):
Well, just even like scheduling downtime.
I find that this is something that's been really helpful for
me is on a day that I do have off from work or study, I
intentionally block out like an hour or two of that day to just
absolutely have nothing scheduled and pending on my mood
or how exhausted I am or whatever I'm wanting that day.
It can look so different, but I find it's just my time to
(27:39):
rejuvenate. What about anything else?
What's something that you can doto reset if you're starting to
burnout? We've mentioned speaking out.
I think I love the idea of the scheduling, the downtime.
I'm always very mindful of like my weekends.
If I've got a couple things on on every weekend in a row and
then I'm working during the week, I know that I'm going to
(28:00):
be exhausted by the end of it. So just always making sure that
I do have a day somewhere that Ican relax and that I'm not
leaving the house and that I canjust do whatever I want and that
it's OK to sit on the couch. Yes.
So like it is OK to be burnt outand rest when your body needs
it. It's it's hard to not feel
(28:21):
guilty about resting, but it genuinely is so important.
Like sometimes we just need to stay home and do absolutely
nothing and maybe engage. And whether it's engaging in
hobbies at home or not, like just rotting on the couch and
watching reality TV, like that could be so helpful for you.
Like, that's my way of rejuvenating.
(28:42):
I want to watch the trashiest TVthere is.
But for some people, it might be, you know, picking up their
guitar that they haven't in a while or doing some arts and
crafts. Whatever you feel like will help
you reset is something that you should devote your energy to if
you've got any left at that point.
I think another one is this is ahypothetical, but writing down
(29:06):
certain symptoms for you to identify when you're starting to
feel burnt out. Yes, I think that's a good idea.
So that way you pretty much know, OK, I'm heading that way,
Maybe I can start correcting it now.
Yeah. Great.
I love that. Yeah.
So writing down like a little list of things that you start
(29:28):
noticing. Yep, exactly leading.
To burnout and then also, in addition to that, writing things
that you could do when it gets to that point, like, OK, now I'm
gonna rest or now I'm gonna block out this time or turn off
my notifications. Yeah, I love that.
So as we mentioned, burnout can hit young people and anybody
(29:49):
incredibly hard, and it's reallyimportant to know if you are
listening that you're not alone in experiencing it.
I think once you understand whatcan cause burnout and especially
your own personal feelings of stress, and like Santi said,
start to recognize those signs early, you can hopefully take
practical steps just to reset and slow down and get back to
(30:12):
rebuilding that healthier lifestyle, whether it's engaging
those things that you enjoyed oryeah, resting as much as you
like. You don't have to push through
it alone though. If you are struggling to use
that motivation to overcome thatburnout, Headspace can support
you in in that way. You can engage online on a
(30:33):
Headspace over the Christmas closure.
Or if you would like to self refer and speak to a clinician
in person, you can absolutely doso via our website at
headspaceadelaide.com. Thank you guys so much for
engaging in this chat. As always, we will put some
really helpful resources and support services that you can
(30:54):
utilize in the transcript of this episode.
And feel free to leave any questions or comments in the
thing below wherever you can comment and we will aim to
answer them if if we need. So thanks guys.
Hope you have a wonderful Christmas and New Year and we'll
(31:15):
be back early in the new Year tochat more things, healthy
headspaces. Thanks everybody.
See ya see. Ya.