From Crisis to Connection - with Geoff & Jody Steurer

I was recently invited to be a guest on the “Therapy Brothers” podcast. In this thought-provoking episode, Brannon Patrick and I delve into the complex and crucial topic of rebuilding trust in relationships affected by betrayal. We explore the foundational role of honesty in the healing process, discuss the challenges and misconceptions about trust recovery, and share personal insights and professional experiences.

The Power of Com...

Sobriety, safety, support, and stability are crucial in the aftermath of addiction and betrayal, and can be found in both inpatient and outpatient treatment scenarios. Join me as I outline the importance of personalized considerations, support systems, and cost implications in making the decision between inpatient and outpatient treatment for addiction and mental health issues.

The Power of Community in Pornography Recovery: Downlo...

Discovering you have been betrayed is an extreme life-altering moment. Knowing what to do or where to turn next can feel insurmountable. In this episode I share 4 thoughts as a “pep talk” for the betrayed partner. Join me as I outline encouraging messages and steps to help you through the disclosure process and moving forward.

The Power of Community in Pornography Recovery: Download Relay and try it out for free, or learn more at R...

The road after a betrayal and disclosure can be long and arduous. In this episode I share 4 thoughts as a “pep talk” for the recovering partner who is inevitably facing extreme discomfort and uncertainty. Stepping into disclosure is an intense, demanding experience, but the aftermath is the time to really do the work as an individual and to support your partner in their new reality.

The Power of Community in Pornography Recovery: D...

The need to be accepted, combined with the fear of abandonment and rejection can lead us into becoming what other people want us to be while hiding who we truly are. This can drive us to deceit, manipulation, lies, and betrayal. In this episode I have invited Dr. Robert Glover to discuss his book, “No More Mr. Nice Guy”. Join us as we discuss the need for emotional honesty and authenticity in order to build healthy connections. Dr....

This week we are re-visiting an episode that aired one year ago, but is an important topic that is continually relevant as we navigate the ups and downs of life.

Life is full of situations that are out of our control. Once we have recovered from the initial shock of what has happened, how do we proceed? Do we continue to live as if we are powerless? Or do we make choices that we can control to heal and move forward? We have to be a...

It's common for betrayed partners to wonder if they'll ever be themselves again. Enduring sleepless nights, constant stress, and regular emotional breakdowns can cause doubt that there can be a future worth looking forward to. This month we are going to focus on how betrayed partners can build resilience in the aftermath of betrayal. We've invited therapist and betrayal expert, Kaylee Dunn, to discuss how betrayed partn...

Narcissism has gained momentum in everyday conversation. While many individuals exhibit varying degrees of narcissistic tendencies, true Narcissistic Personality Disorder needs much more attention and diagnosing than a mere accusation. In this episode we welcome Tony Overbay to discuss the difference between emotional immaturity and narcissism. Join us as we break down both and the importance of understanding narcissism, emotional ...

One of the biggest casualties men experience, often when they are boys, is getting separated from their own hearts and living life on autopilot. Addictions, trauma, abandonment, and other challenges can create more separation and make it difficult for men to feel alive and energized. It can also make it difficult to connect to themselves, to God, and their most important relationships. We invited Kurt Francom, a board member of the...

The Four Levels of Communication - with Nathaniel Gustafson- Episode 235

Communication in a marriage or committed relationship isn't always easy, especially in the aftermath of betrayal. We've invited fellow therapist Nathaniel Gustafson to teach us more about the four levels of communication and how to improve your ability to build a stronger connection. We make a special emphasis on how this can help men, who are often so...

We've invited Julia Witt to join us for a great discussion on transactional versus transformational relationships. Geoff discovered Julia when someone sent him a Tik Tok video of her discussing this topic. He knew he had to invite her to share more with our community. Transactional relationship dynamics are so common, especially in couples healing from broken trust. So many guys who are trying to rebuild trust want to do the ri...

In this episode we are joined by Jason Portnoy, who wrote a memoir called “Silicon Valley Porn Star”. Jason shares his personal journey of addiction, infidelity, and self-discovery. We discuss the importance of surrendering and taking responsibility for unhealthy patterns in order to heal, grow, and overcome addiction. As with any personal recovery story, please recognize that comparisons and criticism are normal reactions, as you ...

In this episode we discuss the topic of rebuilding trust and healing from betrayal. The concepts of 'worthiness' and 'trust' often get confused, and it is extremely important to maintain a clear distinction. 'Worthiness' is someone's inherent human value, which is unchangeable regardless of their actions, while 'trust' is about behavior patterns, competencies, values, and is earned by consistency...

When we have injuries, losses, disappointments, betrayals, and other painful things happen in our marriages, healing rituals are a way we can mark that things are different. We use rituals all the time to symbolically mark changes in our lives, such as graduation ceremonies, funerals, weddings, birthdays, baptisms, etc. We live in a world of symbols and meaning and we can use these things to help us move through our healing. We inv...

When you're healing from betrayal trauma, it's completely normal to still wonder how to keep the relationship alive. If you're completely done with the relationship, then this video isn't for you. However, if you are working toward relationship recovery or you think you want to move toward that as a goal, join in this discussion I had with KayLee Dunn during her "Love You Now" betrayal trauma summit. 

The ...

Most couples never imagine they could find themselves in the crisis of an extramarital affair. The slope is slippery and every couple is at risk for infidelity issues unless they have intentionality and boundaries around their marriage. 

We are joined in this episode by Shannon Brown, a licensed marriage and family therapist, who specializes in affair recovery. We discuss the risk factors couples should be aware of when protecting ...

In this episode we are wrapping up our 4-part series and focusing on spiritual intimacy. Join us as we not only discuss deepening spiritual intimacy when both individuals are on the same page, but as we explore the challenges that arise when couples have different beliefs, or when one person’s beliefs shift. These changes can feel threatening to the relationship, but we will dive into the importance of curiosity, communication, and...

In this episode we continue the discussion on intimacy, this time focusing on intellectual intimacy. Intellectual intimacy is the sharing of ideas, perspectives, and opinions, possibly challenging others’ beliefs, while simultaneously being willing to hear and learn someone else’s viewpoints. Join us as we discuss how asynchronous communication can impact intellectual intimacy in relationships, what to do when one partner hijacks c...

In today’s episode we continue the discussion on intimacy, this time focusing on emotional intimacy. Sharing your deepest thoughts, feelings, and fears requires safety and vulnerability. Join us as we discuss the importance of emotional intimacy and ways to improve and nurture this in your most valued relationships.

The Power of Community in Pornography Recovery: Download Relay and try it out for free, or learn more at Relay's ...