Mz. Vee and Brown Sugar

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:06):
I'm here for a purpose.

Speaker 2 (00:10):
There's a calling on my line.

Speaker 1 (00:12):
He's working to me. I'm shure no longer Burthes. Now
I know who I am. What you gonna what you see?
It's job. It keeps me straining every day on my life.
He's watching over me. Take us for granted. Come on

(00:35):
in the room. You better come on in the room.

Speaker 3 (00:42):
We want to talk to ya, and we want you
to talk back. And in order to do that, you
got to come in the room.

Speaker 1 (00:59):
Come on in the room. Don't come on in and
all we want to talk to you.

Speaker 2 (01:04):
I thought you weren't feeling that good today.

Speaker 1 (01:07):
Yeah, but when you get.

Speaker 4 (01:08):
Ready to come in the room, everything started to come together.

Speaker 1 (01:11):
You got to working together.

Speaker 4 (01:12):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:13):
I got excited.

Speaker 2 (01:15):
I see, I see.

Speaker 1 (01:16):
Well.

Speaker 4 (01:16):
I'm so glad everybody you tuned into mss V and
Bubbling Brown Sugar. She's bubbling. You heard her already. She's
already in the room, already, ready, already set.

Speaker 2 (01:28):
I'm just glad. It's just good to be back.

Speaker 4 (01:30):
It's good to be here, you know every I was
talking to a mechanic today and he said, I almost
had tears in my eyes when I started to think
about how good God has been to me and you know,
and I was just really shocked because I never saw
that part of him. And it's just good that you
know that even regardless of how old you get, you

(01:50):
still know who to give the credit to me.

Speaker 2 (01:51):
Yes, And I was just really impressed with that.

Speaker 4 (01:55):
And I'm grateful to him for not getting not cheating
to know that is God and who's who got you
get all the praise?

Speaker 2 (02:04):
Well show you right now.

Speaker 4 (02:08):
We got a lot of stuff to talk about, so
we want to get started and and just jump on in.
And I'm gonna put Wonder to the test because I
want her to talk about some stuff. And I know
you got it as in you, and I just want
to bring it out of you. You know that that
some stuff you can only get it. It's like a tea.
You don't even get what's into you till you get
into high water. So if I can get you in

(02:31):
some high water, get me if I can. If I
can get you into some high water, ain't no telling
where line to come out of you.

Speaker 2 (02:42):
But the first thing I want to do is an icebreaker.

Speaker 4 (02:44):
I want to ask you both wonders if if someone
had took your husband, your significant other, and they had
held them hostage, and they told you that the only
way you could get them back where you would have
to cut off your right And would you because that's
you know.

Speaker 1 (03:03):
That he's gonna make me answer this lie?

Speaker 4 (03:05):
I know, I know, And so that's one of those
things because you know the night is what would you do?
And so if you and this and this's you don't
never know whats gonna happen, and this probably will never happen.
But hypothetically without holding the man, now, don't say, don't
say what you want need people to hear.

Speaker 2 (03:27):
You tell if the truth, tell it from.

Speaker 1 (03:28):
Your whole Where they holding the man?

Speaker 5 (03:30):
Do?

Speaker 1 (03:30):
They got him tied up? I'm sure he can't just
walk out.

Speaker 3 (03:34):
So how many of them is it? Because he know
how to fight and all and see, I see I
probably will do it. But he probably said, you dummy.
You knew I was gonna get up out of there.
You knew I was coming out there. Why you ain't
calling somebody so you would do it?

Speaker 1 (04:01):
I guess.

Speaker 2 (04:05):
H And I just tell you, don't say what people
want to hear, you tell the truth.

Speaker 3 (04:15):
Yeah, I wouldn't let him go because of my right arm.
That's what that's only one of them.

Speaker 1 (04:20):
I still got another one.

Speaker 3 (04:22):
I'll keep him alive. I have to learn the write
with mylele and plus and remind me that I'm married.

Speaker 1 (04:39):
I keep looking at it. I did that? Well? He
doing for you? Oh why?

Speaker 4 (04:54):
I think you might have just told the story.

Speaker 2 (05:00):
But I don't know.

Speaker 5 (05:01):
You.

Speaker 2 (05:01):
You know that love and make you do somethings.

Speaker 1 (05:03):
Make you do something. I don't know about all things,
but it makes you do something.

Speaker 2 (05:08):
Yeah, you know, I don't.

Speaker 1 (05:10):
I'm not in that position, but if you were.

Speaker 2 (05:13):
If I was in that position, dude, I'm I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 (05:17):
I need my I'm sorry. You you you?

Speaker 2 (05:23):
How did you get in it? Why you in it?

Speaker 1 (05:26):
You probably ask for what you get so you know
I can't. But you say he was a hostage. Usually
they want the money, you know. You know, what is
that value of my arm?

Speaker 2 (05:46):
You got him already?

Speaker 1 (05:47):
Take what you value is my arm? It's worth money?
You know.

Speaker 2 (05:53):
That's why I say something.

Speaker 4 (05:54):
You know some of these questions be dumb questions, but
they all challenge you in your thinking because you know
it's a how much do you value some stuff?

Speaker 2 (06:01):
How much do you value?

Speaker 1 (06:03):
How?

Speaker 4 (06:03):
And you know because I was thinking about this just
recently about how people put money tags on stuff. You know,
every you know everything. Now, I mean they'll do anything
for a few dollars, you know. You know they got
to say what you slap your mama for so many dollars.

Speaker 1 (06:22):
That it and then it depends on how many dollars
I help, I get a heal mama fighter. I'm not
you know, That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 4 (06:34):
Even I heard my daughter say, Mama, you'll forgive me
and we'll but we'll be rich.

Speaker 1 (06:39):
No, it's some stuff you can't do.

Speaker 2 (06:41):
But I don't know how much money. You just can't
do it.

Speaker 4 (06:44):
And they're like, yes, you can, you can, you you
get But I'm like, this is but it's just simply
saying is people put money tags on everything.

Speaker 2 (06:51):
Some things we don't lost.

Speaker 4 (06:53):
We don't lost all our values, we don't lost all
our integrity and indignity.

Speaker 2 (06:57):
Know how much they do it?

Speaker 4 (07:00):
Yeah, No, I'm if if they call my husband or
something and they want me to cut off my because
I may bleed to that.

Speaker 1 (07:08):
I've listen y'all.

Speaker 3 (07:11):
You're listening to ms Van Brown Sugar on Intellectual Radio
dot Com. If your significant other was held hostages and
they said, in order to let them go, you have
to chop off your right arm.

Speaker 1 (07:23):
What you're doing. Wouldn't you do it?

Speaker 2 (07:26):
Would you do it? I know? I mean you just
say you would, and you know your human.

Speaker 1 (07:30):
It's so grateful. I know that's looking at.

Speaker 4 (07:35):
He only listening to you. But I ain't got to
justify that for nobody. But I don't know if I
had somebody, I'm telling them, don't get cocer.

Speaker 2 (07:47):
You may have to suffer because I can't cut down off.

Speaker 1 (07:50):
You cut it off, not a little bit.

Speaker 4 (07:53):
And they won't say you and this if your hand,
you maybe can work with somebody, but they say.

Speaker 1 (07:57):
Your old arm. Yeah, ain't you right hard?

Speaker 3 (08:01):
And you're right, yeah, no, that's a problem.

Speaker 1 (08:04):
That's a problem.

Speaker 3 (08:06):
But but you gotta let him know that he ain't
alone in there.

Speaker 1 (08:10):
I'm praying.

Speaker 4 (08:13):
I'm praying for your baby, and like you and like
you said, some stuff, talk your way out of it,
pray your way through it. Convince them that she ain't
gonna do it. So you wasting time, you some stuff.
You'll be amazed what you can get through.

Speaker 3 (08:28):
Better fight back. And since you already know they got
you stuff, you're.

Speaker 2 (08:32):
Gonna give me so when I got it. I ain't
got nothing new.

Speaker 4 (08:35):
And I was listening to and you know you would
think about this if somebody said that they would you
pay two hundred dollars to get a hug?

Speaker 1 (08:43):
Would you do it?

Speaker 3 (08:44):
No?

Speaker 1 (08:44):
I don't need no hug that bad.

Speaker 4 (08:46):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (08:47):
I ain't paying no two hundred dollars of getting no hug. Ain't.
And you can get me one for two hundred, but
I ain't paying to get one.

Speaker 3 (08:54):
I go get a strong. I can get a hug
to a stranger every day. So I know, I don't
even don't know what you're.

Speaker 2 (08:59):
Saying that with so much convention and passion.

Speaker 3 (09:03):
That's not when I pay somebody to hug them.

Speaker 1 (09:06):
That's not that serious.

Speaker 4 (09:08):
Three you know, you know I'm saying this because in
California they have.

Speaker 3 (09:13):
That somebody them some lonely people. I ain't never been
that lonely.

Speaker 1 (09:18):
Somebody has a job.

Speaker 5 (09:19):
She had she was here on the show, was interviewed
to cuddle cuddle.

Speaker 1 (09:23):
Cuddling is different.

Speaker 2 (09:26):
It's a coloring sanctuary.

Speaker 1 (09:29):
That's different. Where you pay money to get a hug,
you're not that. It's no sex and no.

Speaker 3 (09:36):
You up close you cuddling them now that's different. You're
gonna pay more than you gonna pay for that. Now,
I ain't gonna pay for that.

Speaker 4 (09:43):
You're gonna pay me more than two hundred No, it's
no no intimacy involved. It does not matter you in
my space. I'm paying you two hundred dollars.

Speaker 3 (09:52):
No, you're gonna pay more than that to get in
this type of space?

Speaker 1 (09:56):
No, no, no.

Speaker 3 (09:57):
No, you se then that means you got to get
close to me for a minute and a half.

Speaker 2 (10:04):
Yeah, you just got to hold me.

Speaker 1 (10:06):
Yeah, you're gonna pay more than two hundred dollars.

Speaker 4 (10:08):
Well, some of them I don't need that said some
of it, and I'm like, uh, they can range from
two hundred an hour.

Speaker 1 (10:14):
I'm like, who want to be hell? That that means
they ain't had nothing.

Speaker 2 (10:19):
No, I'm like, and you pay somebody for to hug you.
I told them they could have just come to my church.

Speaker 1 (10:26):
You forget.

Speaker 3 (10:28):
You get as much hugs as you want, as I'm
telling you, I hug you for free.

Speaker 1 (10:33):
But I ain't paying you to do nothing to me.

Speaker 2 (10:35):
I mean when I heard that, I was it was
one of the.

Speaker 4 (10:39):
Gospel radios, and he was I thought it was unheard
of and then I went and I researched, and I'm like, this.

Speaker 1 (10:47):
Is the truth.

Speaker 4 (10:48):
It's called it a coloring sanctuary where you pay Yeah,
where you you where there's no intimacy involved, and it's
all about and they said there's healing in it.

Speaker 2 (10:59):
They the hugs.

Speaker 3 (11:01):
Hugs, you hill, I hug people every day, and and
and and they ain't pay They ain't paying me a dime.

Speaker 1 (11:08):
But you know, I freely give, but I ain't gonna
freely cuddle. No, I ain't doing that. Mm hmm. And
especially if I'm gonna get put out of my house,
You're definitely gonna pay me more than that. Yeah, I
mean they got this.

Speaker 2 (11:20):
I told them myself, what you have to do to
create this cuddle of sanctuary. We could create one.

Speaker 1 (11:26):
Yeah, and have have a rich all the weirdos that's
coming from hugs.

Speaker 4 (11:34):
But you're telling them it's only it's only a hug.
It is no intimacy.

Speaker 1 (11:38):
But see, a hug is different.

Speaker 3 (11:40):
You can hug a person just around them, but when
you cuddle them, you like pull them in and you
get a good one.

Speaker 1 (11:46):
In A hug is no cuddle. You ain't cuddled in
the minute. So cuddling is different coloring with a stranger.
That's different. Yeah, yeah, and this.

Speaker 4 (11:59):
Is and this is, this is what this is.

Speaker 3 (12:01):
They can lay up, lay on the bed, or they
can get on the couch and they get you get
comfortable like you in a relationship.

Speaker 1 (12:08):
But you're not.

Speaker 4 (12:09):
No, they said, ain't like that. You're gonna do no
intimate But if you if you getting like that baby, feel.

Speaker 1 (12:18):
You better look up cuddling you close enough.

Speaker 2 (12:22):
Well, if you're gonna color that much, you might well
going to the intimacy.

Speaker 3 (12:25):
No, you gotta go down. That's probably what they're saying.
I held us so tight, I know she won't me.

Speaker 4 (12:34):
You might do because after that, because they said, this
is just simply no intimacy at all.

Speaker 3 (12:39):
You know, that's that's they they're putting it out there
like it's no intimacy. But you don't know how that
other recipient fear when you're touching on them and they
and then you don'et pay two hundred dollars for the hour.

Speaker 1 (12:50):
Now they want four hours, They won't five hours. They
want something.

Speaker 2 (12:55):
Uh, well, we know that that hugs does care.

Speaker 4 (12:59):
It is you can make a person feel good, feel
They say it takes a lot of their depression, a
lot of their stress.

Speaker 2 (13:06):
It relieves so much the place I'm telling you, when
I went to reading.

Speaker 1 (13:11):
That you went there. No, I told him that you're
trying to get that. You're trying to get there. You're
trying to come up.

Speaker 2 (13:22):
Now when I wouldn't.

Speaker 4 (13:23):
When I read it, I was saying to myself, it's
amazing what people were pay for.

Speaker 1 (13:28):
That's what I'm talking about.

Speaker 4 (13:29):
People put dollar signs on everything and you and you
would be amazed at what people would pay for if
you willing to offer it.

Speaker 1 (13:37):
Now, all you got to do is tap into what
you can get.

Speaker 3 (13:40):
So you're trying to say, I should go to downtown Chicago,
downtown Old Park stand outside and put a sign say
two hundred dollars per hug because I give hug to
a stranger.

Speaker 1 (13:50):
So but I can put the capital on this thing here.
Oh my gosh.

Speaker 2 (13:55):
And you don't know some people got that touchy.

Speaker 5 (14:00):
I mean, apparently these people must be professional.

Speaker 4 (14:06):
If somebody is willing to pay, and you got to
know they willing to pay or whatever there is, the
company went thrive, so apparently it works.

Speaker 5 (14:16):
Really have not had it, like grew up without their
mother's parents given them grew up without it, and it
really they they're so thirsty for it that they're willing
to pay.

Speaker 3 (14:28):
All the lonely or they bunking hearted missed their person
that was in their life.

Speaker 1 (14:35):
Maybe the person that did used to hug them is
no longer there so other reasons for stuff like that, though.
That's I just feel like you're taking advantage of somebody
you charging for it.

Speaker 2 (14:48):
How is that taken advantage of you?

Speaker 1 (14:49):
They the sign is there, you know how much of
cout I didn't know how much you needed it. My
sign was here before you walked up.

Speaker 4 (14:57):
Yeah, I mean anybody, so yeah, pay this is this
is what we do, and this is what you're paying
for and this is what you get.

Speaker 2 (15:04):
But not it's bad that a person would get to
that point.

Speaker 5 (15:08):
That they were sad and that they could go to
a church. There are places that would be open. I
think wider than that then, like to think, where are
places that welcome you and bring you in and love.

Speaker 3 (15:22):
You like that? And and now that I think about
when the COVID span came and everything, people stopped hugging
each other, and so they probably got a place of
isolation where they need that physical touch because some people
don't get physical touch at all, and they probably needed
that physical touch. But I believe that I took so
many shots to I can hug hug a canine.

Speaker 1 (15:44):
And be all right, me too, me too.

Speaker 4 (15:46):
But I'm just thinking that you know, it is painful
that you that you would get to that level and
that you think that you have to pay somebody to
get what is been freely given.

Speaker 1 (15:58):
Yeah, I mean, it's it's so much love out.

Speaker 4 (16:01):
Here, honestly, And I know we done got so bad
that we don't know who to trust, who to lean on,
who do depend on? That it has gotten so bad,
But this is where we're at. There's there's no love anymore.
When they said love as a wax cold, they are right.
But then there's a man that sits the other day
and I was listening to his son and he said
he loved too, I said.

Speaker 3 (16:22):
He.

Speaker 1 (16:24):
He said, he's so easy to do.

Speaker 4 (16:27):
He said he loved two peoples and he said he
and he wanted to know what he needed to do.
I wish I was somewhere. Yeah, I'm like so, so
he says, I'm loving too, and.

Speaker 1 (16:40):
I don't know what to do.

Speaker 2 (16:42):
What would you tell him to do?

Speaker 1 (16:43):
What would you do? What would you say?

Speaker 3 (16:45):
I'll just tell him follow this hard because right now,
in this day and age, they love him two three,
four fives pananormio apple, normenal. I'm not even trying to
make fun of him. But it's so many norminals, so
I don't know you. Yeah, so many different names I
never heard of coming up. So look, I don't agree

(17:08):
with but be you. I'm just gonna tell him be
you because I can't even argue with you, because I
don't even know what normal you are or putting normal
because they've been loving too all they called that cheating.

Speaker 1 (17:24):
What should he do? What they've been doing?

Speaker 2 (17:27):
You know, stuff like that.

Speaker 4 (17:28):
You you hear people talk like that, and what should
I do? Don't you never just want to just go
upside his head? You're talking about you don't want know
what to do? You have a wife and a woman too, Yeah,
like what part do you you? It's not normal, You
ain't supposed to be loving, but one you that means
that you is it's got some serious issues and problems

(17:51):
that you need to address. Yeah, but then that's how
you get caught up in there. Now he loved too,
and you loving him.

Speaker 1 (17:58):
Yep, yep, you see all the time.

Speaker 4 (18:04):
Yeah, I know, like one of those pictures when you
was looking at it and he was cheating and they
came in there.

Speaker 1 (18:10):
And caught it.

Speaker 2 (18:11):
He told her, well you know that, but no the time. No, Now,
what's your strange about this?

Speaker 4 (18:18):
You know this?

Speaker 2 (18:19):
This who I am?

Speaker 1 (18:20):
This is where will for a met me? Now what
you what you think?

Speaker 2 (18:23):
I said? And you setting up that trying to justify
this stuff.

Speaker 1 (18:26):
You're trying to explain this stuff. You're trying to be
with this man. So how do you feel?

Speaker 3 (18:31):
And I'm going to Candy because you just brought up
something in my head.

Speaker 1 (18:35):
Candy and Tired is getting a divorce.

Speaker 3 (18:38):
But they always talked about bringing someone in their bedroom
with them all the time, But they getting into the
divorce for him cheating. How does that make sense to me?

Speaker 1 (18:47):
I don't know. Is it emotional, Bruce, or I don't
see it as cheating?

Speaker 3 (18:53):
If you and him together, say let's bring her in
or they never bringing him in, always about them bringing
up her in, But now they're getting a divorce because
they said he was cheating on her, But ain't he
cheating anyway?

Speaker 2 (19:08):
Well?

Speaker 1 (19:08):
Apparently no, this.

Speaker 2 (19:11):
I probably can't talk on this even know what I'm
talking about.

Speaker 1 (19:14):
But I'm just saying I just was okay with it.
That's not considered cheating.

Speaker 4 (19:19):
Yeah, that's what That's actually where my mind was going.
If she if she said, okay, you can go ahead.

Speaker 3 (19:25):
Yeah, And they used to pick up girls together in
the bar, and so I'm just trying to see where
did the jealousy come in at when you I didn't
tell you.

Speaker 5 (19:35):
To do it right, they did it without her being
included because it sounds like she may be bisexual, and
she partakes with the girl as well, and then he
started excluding the wife. That's when it's cheating, because now
she hasn't said I'm okay with this.

Speaker 1 (19:54):
I think I don't know nothing about kid and the
crazy thing about it.

Speaker 4 (19:58):
Anytime that you a relationship that is outside of the
husband and way, ain't that cheating.

Speaker 5 (20:07):
But I don't think it's I mean, it's cheating in
God's eyes. I mean, it's cheating under the the parameters
of marriage. It's supposed to be the union between you two.
But I do think that there are quite a few
people who are okay with this. What they call them
thrumples now, not couples.

Speaker 4 (20:23):
But oh yeah, see that what they says, if you
ain't with this new new stuff, you don't know stuff.

Speaker 1 (20:29):
I don't know stuff.

Speaker 4 (20:30):
Yeah, I'm telling you because it's so much like you said,
it's different names for stuff. Stuff that is now legal.
Ain't one legal stuff that you do. And to us,
we was crossing the line. We had boundaries and we
didn't cross those boundaries. Now it ain't no.

Speaker 1 (20:44):
Boundary, no boundaries. Oh it's good, you good.

Speaker 2 (20:50):
I can't get it. I can't do it.

Speaker 1 (20:52):
I can't.

Speaker 3 (20:52):
I can'tnot see my husband and I going to a
bar together and we picking up chicks, because that.

Speaker 1 (20:58):
Means where you where you do this.

Speaker 2 (21:00):
This is the swingers, right, that's what.

Speaker 1 (21:03):
They is that that like they do that. The girl
from that group, Yeah she was doing that. Yeah she
was doing that. She was bolding open about it.

Speaker 3 (21:13):
But so that's why it confused me when you say cheating,
because I feel like that's cheating in now anyway, or
you are open the door.

Speaker 5 (21:21):
To it to it now that that's absolutely seems like
it could be that you you introduced the thought.

Speaker 1 (21:27):
I mean, may not have introduced it.

Speaker 5 (21:29):
He may have always been doing it, but it seems
like you make it very confusing. That's the parameters of
when I can do it and when I can.

Speaker 4 (21:37):
Right right, and so yeah, because if you did, you
wouldn't forward. Then you should have rejected in the door. Yeah,
because once you open the door, ain't no sister, you
talking about closing it? No, No, you opened it, and
I ain't no telling what it's gonna come in.

Speaker 5 (21:52):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (21:53):
So because what are you out touring in the all
around the country. And I got these knees, and I
know that you and Judy was getting it on good me,
you and Judy. So I know you weren't mad about
Judy because she already been in our room. So that's
that's what I'm saying. How does that make it cheated?
You know I probably thought the same thing.

Speaker 1 (22:12):
How is that cheap? When we've both been with Judy?

Speaker 5 (22:24):
Right?

Speaker 4 (22:27):
And and this is how we is, This is how
a lot of stuff is getting this stuff. We allowed
doors to cracks, and we allowed stuff to creep in.
And so when we started some stuff, no, back in
the day, No, you can't do it.

Speaker 2 (22:41):
You just can't go. They didn't question that.

Speaker 4 (22:44):
You didn't stet up and give them no conversation when
they said no, it was it was it was no.

Speaker 3 (22:51):
See them some And I think in a marriage or
in a relationship though, some boundaries you have to say
early on. I just feel like when you you share
your bedroom, you just yeah, you open yourself up. And
now I don't feel like it's gonna last. Hey, who
am I because some people in marriage last a long
time with that. I mean maybe they get erectile dysfunctions

(23:14):
and all that other stuff and they need to asktra help.

Speaker 1 (23:17):
I don't know, I don't know, but yeah, you're.

Speaker 3 (23:21):
Listening to ms Van Brown Sugar Intellectual Radio dot com.
Come in call in at seven zero eight two two
three eight ninety five three if you want to share
in with this conversation with us, right, yeah, what.

Speaker 2 (23:36):
Would you do?

Speaker 1 (23:37):
What would you do?

Speaker 5 (23:38):
You know?

Speaker 4 (23:38):
I was just the other day and I think we
talked about this before, and then somebody asked me this
the other day because apparently they going through it. They
at their house, you know, they this this girl or
his wife or whatever. The husband is beating her up
every day and so the husband, so the mayor lives

(23:58):
in the building and he says, what would you do?

Speaker 2 (24:03):
Before I tell you what?

Speaker 5 (24:04):
He did.

Speaker 2 (24:05):
If you live in a building and the husband is
beating his wife every day, what would you do?

Speaker 3 (24:10):
Call the police and center I try to encourage her
to leave. I'm trying to encourage her.

Speaker 1 (24:16):
To leave, and she don't leave.

Speaker 2 (24:17):
Your first, your first obligation was to talk to her
and tell her to leave. Mm hmm.

Speaker 3 (24:22):
I went and try to encourage her and to let
her first of all, not just say leave, but let
her know how encourage her and tell her her worth
that you are somebody and you you, you are very
important in life, you know, because sometimes people need to
be reassured of who they are and what they what
they bring to the table and stuff like that.

Speaker 1 (24:41):
So yeah, and let her know she don't deserve that.
But also.

Speaker 3 (24:47):
She she can be in fear of that man. And
and although you're encouraging them and everything like that, I
would tell them that if if I hear it one
more time, I'm calling the police, and you can let
them know I did. I called on them because I'm
trying to save you, because sometimes we people need to
be saved and they don't know they need to be saved.

Speaker 1 (25:08):
So yeah, I will do that, okay.

Speaker 2 (25:12):
And so that gives you to the next thing, you've
called the police.

Speaker 4 (25:14):
The police then came and the man left, man come
right back, same thing all over again.

Speaker 3 (25:24):
I'm calling again, call you, keep calling. I'm gonna keep
calling till she get mad at me because I'm trying
to see get mad at you.

Speaker 5 (25:35):
Because that's what they do in that domestic violence. Unfortunately,
bringing that to how the domestic violence, I've had that
situation with the woman and what I went to domestic
violence specialist and she said to start keeping the evidence
for her because she kept going back. I was like,
I keep calling the police on on for you when

(25:56):
you keep going back, and I'm thinking, what is happening?
They say takes good seven or eight times for someone
to be to try to leave before they actually leave
something he has to register.

Speaker 4 (26:08):
So the police kept coming. Police kept coming, and then
what happened is the man started threatening.

Speaker 3 (26:13):
Then the man.

Speaker 4 (26:15):
And it got to the point that not only was
he threatening, and then he started to thresh in his car.
Then he started doing all all the crazy things to
the man that kept calling, and so he called the police.
But he couldn't blame him.

Speaker 2 (26:27):
Could be that man. I ain't touched this guy.

Speaker 4 (26:28):
I never did nothing to it, so they couldn't prove
it nothing. So the man still there, he just kept
beating up his wife. And it got to the point
that the man that the friend of mine said that.

Speaker 2 (26:38):
He he moved.

Speaker 4 (26:43):
He couldn't call the police anymore and he couldn't stand
and keep saying it and keep hearing it, so he moved.

Speaker 5 (26:50):
That makes sense because it's nothing really more he can do. Right,
he could call, but if she doesn't want to leave
and won't press charges and won't follow through and keep
going back to him, what is he doing putting his
life in danger for her and she's not even yeah,
and what can you keep doing? And if he can't
keep watching that as a man, then yeah, I guess
he has to move.

Speaker 1 (27:10):
That's bad.

Speaker 4 (27:11):
A lot of stuff is said, and honestly, I think
on some note some people's with even in her shoes,
they can understand it because people stay, and people can
say they're crazy reasons, and people stay for a lot
of different reasons. That's a lot of different reasons. And
you ain't you not walking in a person's shoes, so

(27:34):
you know, even though you're telling them what they need
to do, or you're trying to reassure them and let
them know they're worth You're still not walking in their shoes,
that's true.

Speaker 2 (27:42):
And until that particular person know when enough is enough.

Speaker 4 (27:48):
And I've worked up to my measure and I just
can't I can't do it no more, then the sadness
is what can you do?

Speaker 3 (27:57):
Yeah, but you still got to continue to pour into them.
There'd be people in situation that wish somebody just pour
it into them.

Speaker 2 (28:04):
Because do you think that or they wished it after
it it was over.

Speaker 1 (28:09):
I know it for a fact. I know it for
a fact.

Speaker 3 (28:12):
And then even though it happened over and over again,
those words are still penetrating their minds, those words are
still in their hearts somewhere.

Speaker 1 (28:22):
Just pour into them.

Speaker 3 (28:23):
Even if they don't do it that day, they might
not even do it for a year from now. But
what you said is going to resonate sooner or later,
so you got to continue to encourage it.

Speaker 4 (28:33):
I totally agree. You have to keep you have to
keep trying. But at the end of the day, whether
whether you do it or I think at some point
this is just me speaking, But at some point after
you take when you get tired of being sick and tired,
then something clicks that you like, what had I been thinking?

Speaker 2 (28:56):
What have I been doing?

Speaker 1 (28:57):
You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 2 (28:58):
And this is because everybody.

Speaker 4 (29:00):
It could be security reason, it could be finance reason,
it could be children's reasons. It could be so many
crazy reasons, fear reasons that people stay in places that
they are and you don't know which one is the one.
You know, no, some people staying there. You know what,
I can't raise these children by myself, you know, I

(29:20):
know that used to be an old day. You know,
they were staying like I ain't got no education, I
ain't got no finances. I got to stay here to
help with these children. So everybody has a measure of
what they can do, how much they can tolerate, and
how long they can do it.

Speaker 1 (29:36):
And then, like I said, a lot of times, it's fear.

Speaker 3 (29:39):
I was just reminded of a fifteen year old boy
was with the fifteen year old girl. She broke it
off with him because he wasn't treating her right. The
boy retaliated, went to her house and killed her whole family.
And this just happened recently in the news. He killed
the mama, the brother, and her He just so so

(30:00):
so I'm saying that to say a lot of times
you can leave, but it still doesn't make a difference.
A lot of times you we can speak up. We
just got to do our part to make sure we try,
we try and happen. I'm sure her mama didn't expect
this young teenage kid to come at their house, would
a gone and take her life. And I'm sure her
mom stood up for it and told her you can

(30:21):
leave them, and stuff like that. So a lot of
times people stay in situation not protected, not because they
scared for themselves, but they scared for their loved ones
and what the threats, what the perpetrated threatening them with,
and things of that nature.

Speaker 1 (30:34):
So all of it.

Speaker 3 (30:36):
When a person is being abused, it's a thin line.
It's a fine little home. But if you can get
in and say something, and then sometimes their abuse are
go away from them and come to you like you
did the guy.

Speaker 1 (30:48):
So you have to be prepared for a storm.

Speaker 3 (30:51):
From most cases, you can be bold and you can
talk about it, you can help them, but in your
own space, you have to be prepared for the storm
because it might come your way.

Speaker 2 (31:02):
And in many.

Speaker 4 (31:03):
Situations that I know of, just affect and it was
I was just reading something on the Facebook just recently
where the girl was having some issues and she called
her father and the father.

Speaker 2 (31:13):
Came up there and they got killed.

Speaker 4 (31:15):
I mean, you you just never know some because whenever
you haveing some issues, there are more peoples involved than
just you.

Speaker 2 (31:21):
You know, there are more people affected than just you.

Speaker 4 (31:24):
So you have to just be you know, when things
are happening, you have to you have to be mindful
of what you're doing. And I don't know, like me,
we're doing stuff now, we opening so many doors, we're
letting so much stuff in, and you just now even
way more than ever. You just got to be more
careful and conscientious of stuff that we allow in our space.

Speaker 1 (31:46):
Yeah, it's just so unfortunate.

Speaker 3 (31:48):
And then you can have the best guy ever like
that coach and I've just seen that too, and I
don't know his name, I don't know what team he's from,
but he's the.

Speaker 1 (31:58):
First black coach at It's It's football. Yeah, you seen that.

Speaker 3 (32:03):
And he got fired because he got a staff member
pregnant and paid her to have an abortion. So they
fire him because they you know, they don't they don't
do that. You can't be with the staff and stuff
like that. This young man had everything sitting on top
of the world. Now he goes home and try to
underlaugh his wife. Hey, they got that underlive try to

(32:25):
underlaugh his wife. Not he in jail and they got
him on mental watch and everything because his whole world
was just swept from up on him because he had
he led his lust with the best of him.

Speaker 1 (32:37):
It probably was.

Speaker 5 (32:38):
He's not the Michigan one. Sorry, I didn't know. I
didn't listen to the whole story before I said Michigan.
It's one a coach that just got fired for But
he didn't underlive anybody.

Speaker 1 (32:47):
So no, he tried, so he didn't do it. He
tried to, but he got arrested and they got him
on mental watch.

Speaker 5 (32:54):
Okay, I don't think that's the Michigan coach. So I
don't know that story.

Speaker 1 (32:57):
I'm sorry. Yeah, I just seen it to their lives
out there. I don't need no laws.

Speaker 2 (33:04):
You know, you be hearing so much stuff you don't
know what's right wrong.

Speaker 3 (33:08):
But I'm just saying, in a moment, I bet, and
and everybody was talking about how nice and sweet he was.
I bet he probably never put his hand on his
wife before. I'm assuming that this mistake came out and
she was fussing at him and he couldn't take it
no more. That's just my assumption and everything. But at
the same time, if we just let our flesh get

(33:30):
the best of us at times we get let our
flesh and what we desire and what we want not
meaning that what we want to desire is right.

Speaker 1 (33:39):
We gotta make sure we do what's right.

Speaker 4 (33:43):
And that goes back to the story we talked about
and wein't gonna go talking about it again about the
pastor who was well known up to dated doing all
the right things and went on the face, went on
live and met a woman and then kick the wife
to the curl beautiful.

Speaker 5 (34:00):
Give out the National Domestic Violence Hotline in case anybody
is in any situations that we discuss. It's one eight
hundred seven nine seven two three three one eight hundred
seven nine nine seven two three three the National Domestic
Violence Highline. Somebody wants to get out of a situation.

Speaker 4 (34:19):
Yeah, and we need to at least let them know
there are there are means of escape. I mean, we
even if you don't do it, you need to know
that there is a way.

Speaker 1 (34:30):
There is a way.

Speaker 3 (34:31):
Yeah, there is a way, And I know it's hard
to walk away, but you must find the strength within.
We have to dig down because we have some inner
strength that we never tapped into. Tap into that inner
strength and say I can do this. And let me
tell you something. Sometimes when you be in a situation
where they more power, they think they're more powerful than

(34:52):
you are because you submit it to their power. When
you take your power back and you stand up for yourself,
nine times out of ten the wards they can't handle
what you give back out to them nine times out
of tea. I know because I've been in a situation
where I was like I really wasn't afraid.

Speaker 1 (35:11):
I just didn't want to do it.

Speaker 3 (35:12):
Because we partners, we're a teammate. But after enough was enough,
like you said, I took my power back and the
trajectory of that situation changed.

Speaker 2 (35:23):
Like I can't believe you.

Speaker 1 (35:25):
I was no more, no.

Speaker 3 (35:26):
Longer intimidated by them, and I use what I had,
when I had, how much I could to get them
away from me, and it felt good. And once you
once you found your industry, and once you use that
power that's deep down the side of you and you
let it all out on. I'm not saying I'm promoting violence,

(35:47):
beget violence. I'm saying, do what you have to do
to get free.

Speaker 1 (35:51):
That's what you have to do. Not murdering people and
going to jail, but do what you need to do
to get free. You go to jail.

Speaker 3 (35:58):
Yeah, they control Yeah, they already they controlled you even
the more because they got you locked up because you
you did it differently.

Speaker 2 (36:07):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (36:08):
Yeah, Well my heart goes out to anybody that is
because I'm gonna tell you you can. You can be
the best you can be. And you be in these
situations and you feel trapped. Yeap, You'll feel trapped and
you and you'll be saying to yourself, I can't keep
doing this.

Speaker 1 (36:23):
I ain't doing this.

Speaker 2 (36:24):
And the next day turned to the next day and
the next day, and next thing you know is weeks, months.

Speaker 3 (36:29):
Years, and you sitting back in the bed saying I
can't stand him, I'm sick of him. Now you got
the burning bed going on, So get out before all
that gets you know, we get so mad, we get
so locked in, and you get so tired, and you
get so like I'll have anything else to lose, you know,
took me down, you know, took my dignity, you know,

(36:51):
took my pride and took everything I got.

Speaker 1 (36:54):
So now I'm gonna take you out.

Speaker 4 (36:56):
But you know a lot of times, a lot of feet,
a lot of special with women, a lot of them
feel like that when they don't give them so much.
They don'e took so much, they say, well, I might
as well just staying now, you know, I you know
they done took everything else, so I might as well
just suck it up. You just to be amazed at
how low your mindset get when you have taken so much.

(37:18):
And you better not wait until you get like you
get them old. Now you now you feel like, now
what I'm gonna go? Now, I don't giving you my
best year. Now I'm going down near you.

Speaker 1 (37:30):
And now you want to leave me, you want to
treat me right? I don't want you.

Speaker 4 (37:38):
It's one of those things that they it aspired out
of control and we need to take a hold of it.

Speaker 2 (37:44):
And and you you hurt everybody when you're going through it.
You know, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, everybody connected.

Speaker 3 (37:52):
Yeah, and pure love shouldn't hurt. Love shall feel good,
love shall feel smooth. Love shall feel so comfortable that
you slide right into it. Love shouldn't be an ouch moment.

Speaker 1 (38:05):
It's a moment. Love should not.

Speaker 4 (38:08):
You're going into one of your part You're going into
one of your port you moments out I've been saying,
we donna.

Speaker 1 (38:16):
Turn this to your right in your office.

Speaker 2 (38:19):
You done went into an intimate moment.

Speaker 1 (38:21):
I'm I'm like, that's a ouch moment.

Speaker 2 (38:25):
Wait moment.

Speaker 1 (38:28):
What I don't even know what you said us up?
You had drift away, you had drift away room. What
room you're talking about? Because at one point I'm looking
at you, l now what to tell people?

Speaker 3 (38:48):
How I love you feel? Yes, how I love cha feel?
I ain't talking about feel feel. I'm talking about your
approached you.

Speaker 4 (38:56):
I'm feeling that I feel you. I'm with you whatever,
whatever room that is, I want that one too. I
looked over there, I'm like, wait a minute, is we're
still here?

Speaker 1 (39:08):
It's miss me and Bobby Brown Sugar. We don't wait
until the sugar rooms. The sugar shocker, Well, the sugar shock,
I mean, we we got she transported.

Speaker 2 (39:20):
I'm trying to tell y'all how to Yeah, well, we
got your baby.

Speaker 3 (39:25):
So when you find something that don't feel right, just
leave it alone. That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 2 (39:29):
When you said get a kind of what you say
you forgot yourself? Yeah, baby, but I was like, I
had to look at you because you look at me.

Speaker 1 (39:41):
What else? I'm like, you not got a moment or something?
You remember the car? Your love is?

Speaker 2 (39:51):
I know, I don't know what to say.

Speaker 4 (39:54):
No more, you got me, You got me kind of
in the in the in another another. What kind of
mood you done went to?

Speaker 1 (40:06):
Hey, y'all, this is actual radio. You don't to another one.

Speaker 3 (40:11):
Let us know what love is seven z or eight
two three eight nine five three or put it in
a chat.

Speaker 1 (40:18):
We'd love to hear from you.

Speaker 2 (40:19):
I know it. Come on, moment, baby, I love.

Speaker 1 (40:24):
No hunts for yall, no.

Speaker 2 (40:32):
Wonder she don't want no color.

Speaker 1 (40:36):
I see that colors That color turned to a not
out explaining love to him. I want to leave you.
They like, yeah, baby, that wanted to go hit them
with that poetry. And next thing you know, they got
a wee baby. You're right, this is worth more than

(40:58):
I'm trying to tell you why. She said, you're gonna
pay more than.

Speaker 2 (41:03):
I'm gonna give you the poetry and I'm gonna give
you the who we do?

Speaker 1 (41:06):
Yeah, oh lord, so funny.

Speaker 2 (41:11):
You know what, just just before I came here, I
was talking to a guy. Uh, and what would you do?
He said?

Speaker 4 (41:18):
He walked into the bar and he was buying him
a drink. He looked over and he saw a well
known pastor, and the pastor was getting him a hen
and see in a triple shot and.

Speaker 1 (41:28):
Was getting in plass was getting it in.

Speaker 2 (41:32):
And he asked, and he asked me, h end up
asking you?

Speaker 1 (41:36):
What would you do? Man? My bis right? Bis ain't
got nothing to do with me.

Speaker 3 (41:40):
I got something doing him? A god, I ain't got
nothing to do with but look, he better get up
there on Sunday and do right.

Speaker 2 (41:45):
There's your pastor.

Speaker 1 (41:47):
I ain't got nothing do with it. I ain't got
nothing to do with it. I ain't even know. I
can't judge nobody. He might have had a hard.

Speaker 3 (41:52):
Day his congregation got on his nerve. He might not
even want to drink both of those drinks. He might
want just smell them. So I I'm a mind my business.

Speaker 4 (42:03):
The God told me that after he saw it, he
looked at him some type of way, and he could
not sit under his ministry anymore.

Speaker 1 (42:11):
Well, what did guy do when he go home? Is
he a sane? Do he got a girlfriend? Kids?

Speaker 5 (42:17):
You?

Speaker 4 (42:17):
And I mean and and in the conversation talking to him,
I'm saying to myself, I'm like, I didn't see anything
the man did wrong.

Speaker 1 (42:26):
I mean, I ask you, what would you do?

Speaker 2 (42:28):
I mean you when you think.

Speaker 4 (42:30):
About it, I mean, he saw this man in a bar,
and in the bar, first of all, you in the
bar too, And second of all, this man he didn't
ask him to pay for it.

Speaker 2 (42:40):
He didn't ask you know, he was minding his own business,
drinking his own drink.

Speaker 1 (42:45):
So I mean, I can't I'm just having a human moment.

Speaker 4 (42:50):
And you don't know what took him now right, And
you don't know what he was struggling with at the moment.
And if you couldn't do nothing else, you should have
just pray you for him. Please don't let my pass
get drunk.

Speaker 1 (43:00):
Lord, I don't know what.

Speaker 2 (43:01):
I don't know what my pastor going through.

Speaker 4 (43:04):
But look over and maybe this is an everyday thing,
and whatever it is, do you know that every one
of us, including the pastor, has an answer to himself.

Speaker 1 (43:14):
Yep?

Speaker 4 (43:15):
It ain't like you know, it ain't like you look
at these pastors and think that there is exempt right.

Speaker 5 (43:21):
I want to ask you all, when someone's a pastor,
are they supposed to be in that remp twenty four
hours a day, seven days a week.

Speaker 3 (43:29):
When they're not in the are they expected to? They
are expected to. But someone who's saved is expected with
the same thing. If you say I'm saved and sold
out for God, people expect you or the same thing.
But God says we all fall short of the glory
of God. We fall down, but we get back up.
We are not perfect. Jesus the only one that's perfect.

(43:51):
So if you allow somebody to hold you to a
state of perfection, that's on you. Because I was a
sinner saved by grace, you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (44:01):
So there's no you can't.

Speaker 3 (44:04):
Eliminate the fact that it passes human. He has first natural,
then human, I mean spiritual. He's the natural person first.
So they're gonna find and and then we all have
to repent daily. We all got something to repent for
every single day. So if they follow, that's on them.
Me God, I'm gonna pray for them, and I hope

(44:25):
when I follow whatever you pray for me, and don't
put me on Facebook, don't talk about me real bad,
and don't be so mad at me because I did
the same thing you did. Just because I got a
title when you don't does not make me.

Speaker 1 (44:41):
Drink. We want to know how many drinks he had
that night?

Speaker 4 (44:45):
Yeah, yeah, I mean, obviously I agree, I agree to
what you're doing. If I went, I'll send him a
drink over there to.

Speaker 1 (44:58):
Send one.

Speaker 2 (45:01):
And you know, one of the things that I'm.

Speaker 4 (45:04):
Never ever gonna at least, I try not to get
on a bandwagon of talking about pastors because I know
the pain. I know the hardship of it, and it's
one thing that you can't get out of. It's a
full time job. And whenever you whenever you've been called
because he said you and you've been chosen, it comes
with Unfortunately, it comes on a platform of a huge

(45:29):
lot of responsibilities. But I believe, and this is just
me talking because I wouldn't.

Speaker 1 (45:36):
I don't.

Speaker 4 (45:36):
I know it's hard, but for me speaking, the onlyest
thing the pastor's supposed to do is deliver the mail.

Speaker 2 (45:43):
Now.

Speaker 4 (45:44):
Once I give you the mail, now, I've got to
when I'm giving it to you. I'm giving it to
me too. The same rules that I tell you applies
to me too, only it's different is I have been
called out to give them to you.

Speaker 2 (46:00):
I'm just a male man.

Speaker 4 (46:01):
And he said, feed my sheep. And that's what the
pastor's supposed to do. So once he done that, then
it's up to you to object. Or he said, here's
the table. I put the food on it. Now you
come eat, and if you don't, you can reject it.

Speaker 1 (46:21):
So I don't.

Speaker 4 (46:21):
I'm whatever the pastor was doing, or whatever he was doing,
I wouldn't. It wouldn't even bother me at all, not
at all, not at all, because whatever he has to,
whatever God was doing with him, he's gonna.

Speaker 2 (46:34):
He don't need my help.

Speaker 4 (46:36):
And you look, and if you look at it, and
if you and this is brief as I can say
it is. That's one of the things that bothers me
with people's that's out here and not called to responsibility
or accountability or whatever the.

Speaker 2 (46:51):
Case may be.

Speaker 4 (46:52):
They see everything that's wrong with you and see nothing
wrong with them. Because you asked me for to be
a pastor, you asked me to marry, You ask me
to pray for you. Ask me to be on the
wall for you. Ask me to commune you, ask.

Speaker 2 (47:03):
Me to to baptize you.

Speaker 4 (47:05):
Ask me to come to your house and pray for you,
and get and go to said dedicate your house.

Speaker 2 (47:11):
You want me to come there and pray for your children,
to go to the jails.

Speaker 1 (47:14):
You want me to do all of these things.

Speaker 4 (47:16):
Because I'm the pastor. Then you want me to marry you.
Then you want me to baptize you. Then you want
me to christian your children's and then you everything, and
I can do one thing you think is wrong. You
hate me, yeah, and I don't done. I done done
way over and be young what I'm being called to do.

(47:39):
And now you can't do nothing but judge me that.
But unfortunately, and I think pastors is one of the
the the uh that thing that's gets talked about. The
worst they do. I mean, they they they the worst peoples.
They taking your money, they they ain't supposed to driving

(47:59):
no car, and everything they seeing what is wrong with them,
and still of saying, you know what, whatever it is, God,
restore him, pray for him, bring him back, whatever the
case may be.

Speaker 3 (48:13):
Because you don't know how many funerals of young people
they went to that week, that month, that day. You
don't know how many hospital beds they have to stand around,
and some of us can't stomach it. But they got
to stand around those hospital beds and go in those
rooms and pray over the sick and try to raise
the dead.

Speaker 1 (48:29):
And if they ain't raised the dead, they ain't did
it right. You know, you gotta do those things and
then go home with this on their minds and then
the hearts.

Speaker 3 (48:38):
You don't know how many times that I used to
hear my past some pastors say that I come all
the way here to preach to you, and I ain't
even got no gas, I ain't got no lights, I
ain't got this and that. But I'm still here. I'm
still trying to feed the sheep. So you know, we
gotta be a mindful of what we say. And then

(48:58):
you go home and have a good time family, your friends.
You turn up for why but I can't do nothing?

Speaker 4 (49:04):
Yeah, I mean we it's some things, and I'm we
and we all just like you say, human, and we
all say some stuff and most of it sometimes we
don't even mean it, and a lot of times we
just we we talk before we think. So that's all stuff,
but it's at the same time, while you busy talking,
they said, pray about it. He said, pray about everything.
You ain't got no time to be talking and complaining

(49:25):
and whining. It's too much hurt out here. And why
are you talking about the preacher and talking about the postles.
Talk about these kids that's killing one another. Talk about
these home that's broken, Talk about these children that has
no father.

Speaker 1 (49:36):
Take about these directions that need mentors. Talk about this.

Speaker 4 (49:40):
It's so much stuff that we could fuel energy and
turn that energy toward instead of talk about the man
that's tells me that is in the church is trying
to tell you something. Turn that energy and turn it
to another way and say, you know what, Let's get
out here and just walk and pray for these young peoples,
our future generation, our next leaders, our next presidents. Let's

(50:03):
get out here and try to save them, restore them.
While we busy trying to put down on. Somebody that
is trying to stand up, is trying to keep it up.
He's trying to have a family.

Speaker 1 (50:13):
There's so many pastors that's turning away.

Speaker 2 (50:15):
I didn't mean to go there, so I think she
was right.

Speaker 4 (50:22):
I ain't mean to go that far because I know
that you know some stuff I go too far on
and I didn't want to stay there.

Speaker 1 (50:29):
I just know that David said, it is you against
you and you alone.

Speaker 3 (50:32):
God has our sin and done these things, so you
ain't did it against men, now against God.

Speaker 1 (50:37):
So that's who you got to answer to.

Speaker 2 (50:38):
That that's who you have to answer to.

Speaker 4 (50:40):
And our last subject, and this one is kind of touching,
so I put it last, or put it where we
wouldn't even talk about it at all, even though you
know a lot of this stuff. And we actually I
could stay right up with the pastors because you know
I could.

Speaker 1 (50:53):
I promise you I could.

Speaker 4 (50:55):
But because I think that what we do is we
look for other peoples to fix our problem when sometimes
the fixing is within you. Sometimes we looking at all
the blame or somebody else when all you got to
do is stand look in the mirror because it's it's
sometimes it's the man in the mirror. This last subject,
and what would you do now? And I know this

(51:17):
is it ain't pertaining to nobody that I know. You
know nothing, but yeah, make sure you know that gonna
see people gonna say she talking about No, I'm not
talking about nothing.

Speaker 2 (51:30):
It's just this is one of the Facebook situations.

Speaker 4 (51:33):
And if you is if you a mother, a grandmother,
and here's a young man he did not take your
daughter's life, but he was involved in with the girl
like it was his girlfriend. Do you think that the
chap that your daughter's children's should still be with him.

Speaker 3 (51:53):
Oh my god, that's a really to you one, because
it's to me is real touching because if you involved
in somebody, with somebody and with that person that could
bring harm to my child, What do I think that
you would do to my grandchildren?

Speaker 1 (52:14):
What do I think that you were allowed to be
done to them?

Speaker 3 (52:17):
So I at that moment, if it's something that's it
has to be something God had to deliver me from
because I don't believe that I will want my grandchildren
around you because I can trust you.

Speaker 1 (52:28):
You messed up my trust.

Speaker 3 (52:31):
Although you may not have done anything, you may not
have did anything wrong to my daughter, but you allowed
it in your presence as the father of her children,
and I can't trust you.

Speaker 1 (52:44):
I can't trust you. This was the deep conversation we
got into today.

Speaker 4 (52:49):
And obviously I always try to tell them, and this
is this is something I try to say. And even
though I don't, I'm not saying I'm right, because everybody
has an opinion.

Speaker 2 (53:03):
But I told them that's the daddy.

Speaker 1 (53:08):
I'm just a grandmama. I don't care, I know.

Speaker 4 (53:14):
And that's exactly that's exactly what they said, Exactly what
they said, because never once have you I got grandkids,
and I'm supposed to be the best grandmama that I
can be.

Speaker 2 (53:26):
I'm not their mother and I'm not their father. And
regardless of.

Speaker 4 (53:30):
How we picture things and see things, kids need to
be with the with their mom and daddy.

Speaker 2 (53:37):
They need to be with them.

Speaker 4 (53:38):
And never once is anybody ever said that the man
was was mean to the child. A man, good father,
very but now here is now you putting the child
in between a grandmama and a daddy. I don't think
it's fair because now you having to deal with the

(53:59):
pain of your grandchild. And regardless of how you say it,
the child loves his daddy. He loved his daddy.

Speaker 1 (54:09):
Now what I.

Speaker 4 (54:10):
Should do and what I should try to do and
I ain't in this situation, And trust me, everybody needs
to know. The one thing stuff is easy to say
when you ain't walking through.

Speaker 2 (54:23):
You have to know that now, if my.

Speaker 4 (54:27):
Daughter or whatever or whoever is gone, these ones that's
left need to find a way to restore. We got
to live for this time baby, and the baby, regardless
of what done happened, he need a future.

Speaker 3 (54:44):
But you, but the mother lost her child, so that
mother is still grieving over her child. And if the
father didn't have anything to do with it, and he's
compassionate for the mother and he as he wasn't for
the daughter, then he would say, I'm gonna let her

(55:08):
have this way right now, so until she until she
gets through her grieving process, so we can work some out.
It shouldn't be a battle at this moment because he's
in between all of that and he's in regardless of
what he did it or not, he's the reason for it.
So because he is the reason for this child not

(55:29):
having his mother, he should have some compassion for the
other lady's mother.

Speaker 4 (55:35):
So even if even with that being said, that don't
just shouldn't the mother, the mother of the of the daughter,
have the same thing.

Speaker 3 (55:44):
No, no, because she lost her child, but at the
same she lost her child, but his child's still alive.

Speaker 1 (55:54):
His child.

Speaker 3 (55:55):
Still, he han't lost his child. He was a child
with him before mother died. No, why should he be
with him.

Speaker 2 (56:03):
Now because the mother's not there.

Speaker 1 (56:05):
No, I don't agree. I do not agree. No, it's
a reason why he wasn't living.

Speaker 4 (56:11):
No, I don't know agree grandmama taking a child when
the mother and father is still alive.

Speaker 2 (56:18):
Nobody agreed with me?

Speaker 4 (56:19):
And all I try to deal them, don't we have
to be not so one sided because you because you
have to realize, regardless of what both of them feel like,
you got somebody stuck in the middle. And that person
that's stuck in the middle, regardless of all this, that's
his side talking.

Speaker 2 (56:37):
Because trust me, what I say is gonna get in
his ear. What you say gonna get in his ear. So,
now what are we doing?

Speaker 4 (56:44):
We feeding something that's gonna be that's gonna be devastating
to a child.

Speaker 3 (56:49):
But how do you protect this child as a father
and you fighting for the other person that did this
to the mother to be free? You fighting with that
person who took the life because there's two children involved,
So you so.

Speaker 1 (57:04):
How are you?

Speaker 3 (57:04):
More so, how do you think this child is gonna
feel in the house with his father, and he's fighting
for this person that took my mama life.

Speaker 1 (57:12):
That's destrumental too.

Speaker 3 (57:14):
What situation is you talking about anything? You just said
he was in a relationship. You said he was in
a relationship with the with the woman but he didn't
do it, But he he was in a relationship with
the person that did it. So if he was in
a relationship with the person that did it, that mean
they were still in a relationship. That means there was
something going on with them, and he's gonna fight for her.

(57:34):
So how do that child supposed to feel if regardless.

Speaker 2 (57:41):
Regardless of how either one of them feel, what do
the yiad need?

Speaker 3 (57:45):
Mm hmmm. I asked the baby where he want to be?
But at the same time, I wouldn't trust that father.
You wouldn't trust your father with his own son?

Speaker 1 (57:54):
I don't. I wouldn't.

Speaker 2 (57:56):
So what would we do?

Speaker 1 (57:57):
Go to court?

Speaker 4 (57:58):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (57:59):
God, you would trust him after his girlfriend killed his baby?

Speaker 3 (58:06):
Right?

Speaker 1 (58:06):
Would you would try him?

Speaker 3 (58:08):
Now?

Speaker 2 (58:09):
Now what story are you talking about?

Speaker 1 (58:10):
Now? I'm talking about what you just asked us.

Speaker 4 (58:14):
I would.

Speaker 1 (58:16):
I didn't understand. They tell the.

Speaker 2 (58:19):
Question, No, no, you you understood, you understood.

Speaker 3 (58:22):
I wouldn't trust it with the girlfriend that killed the other,
the baby's mother.

Speaker 1 (58:26):
Yeah, he's in a relationship with that woman. This the
question that made it person. You can't do it.

Speaker 4 (58:35):
I didn't want you to go to that.

Speaker 2 (58:36):
But what happened was, this is a grandmother. Her daughter
is gone, but the child still has a father.

Speaker 1 (58:46):
But the father he did not kill the daughter, did
his relationship.

Speaker 4 (58:51):
But the relationships Sometimes you in relationships like baby Mama drama.
You in relationships like that, and and unfortunately it happened
like that and the daughter passed.

Speaker 5 (59:07):
I would be very afraid seeing he chooses poorly obviously
that I leave my granddaughter with you. What to say
they you find somebody else who gets jealous and decide
you're giving this little girl all this attention.

Speaker 1 (59:20):
I want him to maybe straighten some things out. First.

Speaker 5 (59:23):
You definitely have access to your child. This is your child,
not mine, but I'm gonna need.

Speaker 4 (59:28):
So, so you would say stay here, but you can
still come and have access to the child and still
see the child, still be a part of the child's life.

Speaker 5 (59:37):
Y'all needs to stay with me because you're dating and
you're doing I want you to have your life, continue
to have your life, but just so I can just
she needs constant hugging it. She needs extra right now
because she lost some mother. You do you you come visit,
Let's make arrangements. You come every Tuesday, Thursdays, whatever arrangements
you have with the mama, continue those arrangements and she'll
stay here.

Speaker 4 (59:59):
Now that would probably can see that if we are
not hostile with each other and were trying to because unfortunately,
and the hurting part about it, the child, somebody's life
has been taken and you cannot bring it back. So
all you can do is pour into the one that
she has left. And I know the grandmother wants to

(01:00:22):
hold on to everything that this baby got because that's
all she got left for her baby.

Speaker 1 (01:00:29):
So you want to hold on to it. But it's
not about the mother, like you said, it's about the
child and child.

Speaker 4 (01:00:34):
It's about the child and the child. Still every you
you cannot because because at some point you need to
need some healing and you need and how you do
it you have to keep embracing it, embracing the grandchild,

(01:00:55):
seeing what the child needs, moving a father out of
the way.

Speaker 1 (01:01:01):
It's not the way, No, I don't think it's the
way at all.

Speaker 5 (01:01:04):
But I do think I wouldn't want him to have
soul custody and he's still around.

Speaker 3 (01:01:14):
That.

Speaker 2 (01:01:14):
I don't think that. Maybe that wasn't the man's intent.
Maybe he didn't know that. You don't, We don't know,
But at some point you have to know that I
don't care who my, my, my, uh, the child is.
This is the daddy.

Speaker 1 (01:01:30):
All mothers and all daddies are not right.

Speaker 3 (01:01:34):
Yeah, well they can say that about all that just
because you've got a title as a mother or daddy.

Speaker 1 (01:01:41):
We don't make it.

Speaker 2 (01:01:43):
We can say that about a lot of people's it's
about him.

Speaker 1 (01:01:46):
He has shown the behavior to be around murderers.

Speaker 4 (01:01:49):
Look, you know, do you know that the do you
know that all the jail is full of them, full
of them that is shot killed, murder, and the streets
still of them, and the streets are full of them.
I mean we we It ain't like this one person
were talking about. We are talking about so many families

(01:02:10):
is going through stuff. But at the end of the day,
the mother and the daddy I was the sole responsible.

Speaker 3 (01:02:16):
That's why I say, if this happened to a child,
a mother's child, even if she say I want my
grid baby, right, now as the father who know that
he's the reason for all of this chaos, give her
that he is the reason.

Speaker 1 (01:02:30):
Even if he not with them, he can be broke
up with both of them. He the reason. So he
needs to let allow that grandmother to me to.

Speaker 3 (01:02:37):
Get her closure that she needs because she's going through
through her grieving period.

Speaker 4 (01:02:41):
He could simply tell you you know, if he you know,
if not, I don't. I don't believe nobody would do
something like that. But he could easily go to court
and just say I don't want her to have no
parts of my baby. She is gonna she she is,
she is gonna distort my baby. She's gonna talk about him,
she's gonna make me, he gonna hate me, and I

(01:03:02):
don't want her around him. And then how do you
think you don't feel now that you have lost everything,
Everything has been taken from you, not only your child,
but the only thing that you had to resemble your child,
And you wanted to be bitter, You wanted to be hatred,
you wanted to be hostility.

Speaker 3 (01:03:21):
You can't talk. I can't talk on that because that's
a grieving mother. So I can't say how we can
say how we should do that, but if we not
have walked in her shoes. And that's what I said
in the very first tear, the very the very first instance.

Speaker 4 (01:03:38):
I said, unless you walk into a shoes, you only
assume what you are new, or you only think what
you would do. But when you come face to face
with some situations, you find out you ain't thought you
you didn't know what you was talking about, You ain't
strong as you thought you was, or you didn't it
didn't work out like you thought. And it happened every
day that when we started to thinking, oh I did that,

(01:04:01):
Oh all of kids them, I did this, And when
it comes to you, it's a horse with a whole
new different color. So sometimes you and that's all we're
doing is talking and speaking, but if it comes to reality,
you don't.

Speaker 3 (01:04:15):
Really know what you'll do because emotions changedge.

Speaker 4 (01:04:20):
Or when that emotion kick in, things can go so
another way. That's what I told you was the last subject.
That's why I told you you can go either way,
because you don't know. When you start to feeling and passion.

Speaker 1 (01:04:34):
And you is a mother and a girlfriend, mama, all that.

Speaker 4 (01:04:37):
Stuff started to coming up, and you start to putting
yourself in this woman's shoes. This was my baby, and
because of some stupid yet whatever the case, that she's
gone not all I got to do is blame you now.
But at the end of the day, we got something
more precious. We got a life we gotta preserve, and

(01:04:58):
we got to do it and whatever it takes. And
if I got to swallow some pride, I gotta swallow
some pride. If it mean I got to talk less,
I got to talk less.

Speaker 2 (01:05:07):
I want my grand baby. I want him in my life,
and I want him to grow up and be productive.

Speaker 4 (01:05:12):
I don't want him grow up in anger, grew up
in hatred, growing up only seeing the bad side of anybody,
because all of us got some good and we got
some bad. So I don't want him to see the
bad side. And you might do it without even thinking.

Speaker 3 (01:05:30):
You've been listening to ms V and brown Sugar Baby,
Home Mom, give us that moment again, Brown Sugar Baby,
Brown Sugar Baven.

Speaker 1 (01:05:43):
We love y'all, baks for tuning in. Come on back,
let time and say with us, come away. I'm here
for the purpose. There's a crawling on my line. He's

(01:06:06):
working to me. I'm sure, no, no, no,