A Letter to the Wife Who Wants to Talk about More than Kids and Calendars on Date Night // Melissa Tablada

In this is the fourth and final episode in the Letters to Wives season, my guest is Melissa Grace Tablada. She’s a Catholic psychotherapist and fertility care practitioner. Throughout this Letters to Wives series, many of my guests have mentioned how marriage therapy radically changed their marriage for the better.

Melissa and I are talking about what you should be looking for in a marriage therapist, the lies that keep you from therapy, and how to love your spouse in challenging seasons.

But we’re also talking about connecting with your spouse while raising a family, how to make date nights intentional, and how to have good, quality conversations with your husband. 

Whether you’re looking for a quality marriage therapist to help your marriage thrive or you want some tips for having a quality conversation on your next date night, sister, this letter is for you. 

Topics we cover:

• Melissa’s story as a Catholic woman

• Why you shouldn’t wait for a crisis to consider marriage therapy

• How to go about choosing a good therapist for you and your marriage

• Some of the reasons that women and couples stay away from marriage therapy

• Bringing up your desire for marriage therapy with your spouse

• What to do if your spouse is hesitant to go to therapy with you

• Melissa’s advice for what to do if you’re feeling disconnected from your spouse while raising a family

• How to connect with your spouse on date night and Melissa’s surprising advice about how to get into deeper connection

• Why Melissa and her husband go on a marriage retreat every year and Melissa’s advice for going on a retreat with your spouse

• How Melissa lives out the feminine genius in her daily life as a wife

Resources for you:

• Follow Melissa on Instagram

• Check out Melissa’s website

• Melissa’s (free!) 25 questions for better connections in your marriage

• 14 Day Marriage Connection Challenge (use the code LETTERS for 15% off!)

• Subscribe to Naptime Notes and get early, ad free access to all the Letters to Women episodes for just $5 a month

Discussion questions:

1. Have you been to marriage therapy? If yes, how has it impacted your marriage? If not, what are your thoughts on reaching out to a therapist after listening to this conversation with Melissa?
   

2. Have you believed the lie that your marriage “isn’t that bad” or the lie that your marriage is “beyond saving”? How do you think the Lord desires to speak truth over your relationship and sacrament?
   

3. Does your marriage have a support team? If not, what is the first step that you could take today to creating a community around your marriage to support and encourage you?
   

4. What are three questions you can ask your spouse on a date night or as you connect at the end of the day that can facilitate connection?