Misseducated

José

I am sitting on the cracked, faux black leather couch in a white beam of LED light. Underneath the sparkling sheath of my green-blue dress is my matching tangerine orange underwear set. José is crouched on his knees on the floor in front of me.

I notice the way he sees me. His drunken eyes double-take as I open my legs. I look down over the lip of my dress and back up into his brown eyes, teasing. I want to control him. It’s lik...

TL;DR Better out than in. Be bold. Tell people you love them while you still can. No regrets. 💌 ✍️

Dear Wonderful Readers,

My grandmother is not getting out of bed. I can't help but think of what she's leaving behind: the things, the people, and the world outside her room. She spent all of COVID alone in her apartment on the second floor of a crumbling stucco building in Koreatown, Los Angeles. She was happy living there until she h...

Dear Wonderful Readers,

This morning, I woke up grumpy and exhausted, scrolling depressively for thirty minutes, debating whether to even get up. My self-criticism has been flaring up again, making life almost unlivable.

“Come to this self-portrait event at Soho House!” my friend coaxed me via WhatsApp.

I frowned. Most of me wanted to stay at home, hiding. But after a short self-compassion practice to stop me destroying myself from se...

Abstract (TL;DR) ⏰

After 64 attempts and zero orgasms, I finally understood why 81.6% of women can’t reach orgasm from intercourse alone. Here, I uncover the reasons why. I was in a one-year relationship. We were in our teens, and although we had lots of fun penetrative sex in different places, neither of us understood the importance of the female’s pleasure in a heterosexual relationship. I cite a research paper where I self-identi...

Dear Wonderful Readers,

The following vignette is what we call a “raw write.” I wrote it in 40 minutes in my writing class called UnMute, led by my incredible writing teacher, ANN RANDOLPH. I've been attending Ann's classes for the last three and a half years, and working with her has been a huge part of my creative journey. She'll be starting up UnMute again in the fall for any of you who have a lot of stories bubbling away inside...

Dear wonderful readers,

Today, we have the ultimate treat for you all! This week, two shameless sex writers on Substack sat down to share our personal experiences of what it's really like to publish the details of our intimate lives on the internet.

Share the steam with a spicy-minded friend 🔥

Abigail A Mlinar Burns, the married sex writer behind Happy Endings, and Tash Doherty, the single sex writer behind Misseducated by Tash Doher...

What you see on social media can stand in your way of being shamelessly sexy. Here’s what to do about it.

Short Answer ⏰

Comparing yourself to others on social media creates a shame spiral that traps you in four ways: expectation, comparison, striving, and validation. To counteract this, change your media diet (follow fewer accounts that make you feel terrible, and more accounts that make you feel good), reflect on what exactly you a...

On a warm afternoon in May 2011, I was walking down Tottenham Court Road in London. I had passed through the wide, open grassy squares of Bloomsbury and Holborn, filled with corporate people enjoying the late spring sun. Now, I was surrounded by the streets of fried chicken joints and tourist souvenir shops packed with people as I headed to catch a double-decker bus home.

At 16 years old, navigating London was nothing new to me. I h...

Introduction 💒

“Oh, it's a nice day to start again / It’s a nice day for a white wedding” — Billy Idol, White Wedding.

A new line from Paperless Post appears in your email inbox. You’re hesitant to open it because it can only mean one thing. Yet another couple you know is fulfilling society’s most boring prophecy: they’re getting married.

Weddings are challenging things. They test us. They plonk themselves down in the middle of our l...

Introduction 🚀

“The challenging thing is that we tend to feel that we live in a liberated age and that, therefore, it’s especially odd to feel that sex is a bit odd.” — Alain de Botton, Design Matters Podcast.

This article has been years in the making; it’s an honor to share it with you today. It combines two beautiful things: sex (love and intimacy) and writing. Plus, elements of what I’m going to share with you have been shown to ...

Warning: This piece discusses my menstrual cycle in depth. If that doesn’t interest you, please do something else with your time. I won’t be offended. Thanks!

“Man is an intelligence, not served by, but in servitude to his organs.” — Aldous Huxley, Brave New World.

Dear Wonderful Readers,

I am not a scientific expert when it comes to a complex topic like the menstrual cycle. But as a writer who is curious about the world, since I got ...

I scheduled a meeting with my boss one cold mid-March morning in New York City. Since saving up almost $40,000, I had started to taste freedom in my morning coffee. My courage came out of nowhere. I was about to do something crazy. I was on the edge, flirting with the real world. That morning, I did the dead. I quit my full-time job.

Three years have passed since that fateful morning, and this week, I hosted a party to celebrate tha...

Introduction 💌

When you find out your crush doesn’t like you back, it’s a dagger to the heart. It’s a stab to the ego. But when you hear they like someone else in your friend group instead, it’s a double blow. The tsunami that follows the earthquake. For example, last week, I found out that the guy I sent a fun love letter to actually fancies my friend, and now they’re dating. Meanwhile, I’m still single and have been left to wallo...

Hello Wonderful Readers,

What I’m about to share with you is completely real.

I wrote a love letter to another writer. We met through friends in Mexico City. Over dinner, he told us he had written a short story about sex, and about him. I told him I wanted to read it. I gave him my email address. At the club later that night, after he had emailed me the story, he stood over me and talked loudly over the music into my ear,

“Will you se...

Introduction

My mission is to help the world be shamelessly sexy. To me, that means not feeling ashamed about who you are or the type of sex you want to have. It means going after the things that you want in bed and in life.

Being shamelessly sexy looks different for everyone. It’s something you need to define for yourself on your own terms. Also, no one can ever be perfectly shamelessly sexy. That’s because shame is a normal human ...

Intro

Hello Wonderful Readers,

Sometimes, it’s the chance encounters that can lead to the most fruitful stories. And that’s exactly what happened when I met Pauline about a month ago.

As you know, our mission at Misseducated is to help the world be shamelessly sexy, and as far as I'm concerned, very few people embody that quite as much as Pauline. I was going to publish another article this week, but I just had to share her story wi...

Hello Wonderful Readers,

Last week, I interviewed Camilla Sievers, founder of Qi Health. Qi is a Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) company that creates personalized blends of natural herbs to solve various problems in women’s health.

Camilla was inspired to create her company from her journey using TCM to relieve her persistent period cramps and other symptoms. Now, her team has built a seamless digital experience to help people acc...

🎶 Recommended song pairing (my friend Holly’s idea!):

Introduction

My mission in this life is to help you become shamelessly sexy. Of course, helping you figure out how to be sexy is the fun part. But before we can do that, we need to focus on what no one wants to talk about: shame.

Exploring our shame is challenging. This experience is not going to be comfortable or easy. But I can guarantee that if you can process parts of your s...

Introduction

So, you’re curious about having a one-night stand. I’m glad you’re here! I’ve had a few in my time; some very successful, some less so. Whether this will be your first one or you’re a regular wondering how to make casual sex work better for you, I’ve compiled everything I know to write this ultimate guide to having the best one-night stands ever.

The main difference in preparation depends on the sexes of the partners inv...