SEATTLE INFRASTRUCTURE FAILS as Flooding Sends Rats Into Home Toilets

Toilet rats. Yes, you read that right. Western Washington health officials are warning residents that flooding could send sewer rats swimming up into your toilet bowl—because apparently, 2025 wasn't weird enough already. This is the same public health department that brought you "booty bump kits," so you know we're in good hands. We break down their official advice: stay calm (good luck with that), close the lid, flush repeatedly, and—wait for it—squirt Dawn dish soap into the toilet to make the rat slide back down. Because nothing says "government efficiency" like telling taxpayers to lube up their toilets and hope for the best. What happened to actual infrastructure maintenance? How about fixing those cracked sewer pipes before Norway rats start doing the backstroke through our plumbing? Is your first instinct really going to be "grab the Dawn" when you lift that toilet lid? Drop a comment if you've had a rat visitor—and whether the dish soap trick actually worked. Don't forget to subscribe for more stories that make you question everything.