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March 15, 2022 115 mins
"Lookie, Lookie, I got traumatic memories of Captain Hook stabbing a child to death." Years before Legacy Sequels were cool, Steven Spielberg decided to ask the question, "What if Peter Pan grew up and forgot all about Neverland?" Turns out he'd be a corporate lawyer and his kids hate him! "Hook" had a killer premise, an incredible cast led by Robin Williams and Julia Roberts and that steady Spielbergian hand. The marketing for the film was such an enticing tease too... how about that little hook-shaped latch on the window? Killer! Dustin Hoffman gets top billing as Captain Hook, and you don't even see him in the trailer! In hindsight, it seems like Spielberg was hiding the part of the movie set in Neverland, after Hook kidnaps Grown Peter's kids. Some impressive set design aside, the meat of "Hook" that takes place in fantasy land mixes so many strange tones and subplots that it's hard to get invested. Peter makes out with mermaids, gets a convoluted origin story and kisses his future wife while she sleeps (consent dude!). And Tinkerbell turns big, and Captain Hook is suicidal. Also Hook can somehow brainwash Peter's son into forgetting all about his own father in a span of just three days. But don't worry, kids, there's a food fight! Bangarang! Old Millennials Remember Movies hosts Tyler and Angela try to crack the wild mess that is "Hook." Is this Spielberg's worse movie? Maybe? Is he even capable of making a completely bad movie? Well, no, there's still some really good moments here, especially in that opening act with Maggie Smith. Apparently Maggie Smith wore old age makeup to play 90-year-old Wendy, but how does she look EXACTLY LIKE THIS in 2022?! The Old Millennials talk about little league baseball (get a logo on that baseball cap, Charlie Korsmo!), Hoffman and Bob Hoskins screwing around in lieu of actual character work, the Lost Boy that somehow turns himself into a ball, that strange Glenn Close cameo, and, yes, the whole ordeal with Rufio, Rufio, ROOF - EEE - OHHH! Also discussed on this episode of Old Millennials Remember Movies Drive My Car (2021) Fresh (2022) The 355 (2022) The Tinder Swindler (2022) Attica (2021) Downfall: The Case Against Boeing (2022) Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle (2017) Knives Out (2019) Murder on the Orient Express (2017) Jackass The Movie, Jackass 2, Jackass 2.5  
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