March 28, 2024 • 53 mins
#25: In this compelling episode, Jenn Crowshaw takes us through her post-divorce journey of rediscovery, sharing how she navigates Austin’s dating scene with authenticity and a Gen Z spirit.
Jenn opens up about breaking free from religious constraints, embracing her femininity, and finding independence through transformative experiences.
We dive into the challenges of dating as a single parent, offering insights into how relationships with children reshape the pursuit of new love. Tune in for an honest and humorous discussion about modern relationships, personal growth, and starting anew.
Featuring highlights from our collaboration with The Jenn Z Podcast, this episode is packed with heart, humor, and wisdom for anyone navigating life’s transitions.
You can follow THE JENN Z PODCAST by JENN CROSHAW:
@jennzpodcast
Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.
You can follow Pain In My Cass Podcast: @paininmycasspod
You can follow Cassandra Jean:
@paininmycass_
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
He just said dude, she's gorgeous, my gosh, okay,
I'm coming here, Okay, perfect,yay, thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
So Jen just got to Austin and she already has like
potential skitters.
I hope so.
I hope so Is what you're saying.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
I'm trying, I know.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
I've been sitting you up right now, thank you.
Speaker 3 (00:15):
If you didn't have a boo.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
I got a DM about you already you know, look, I'm
gonna stay, I'm gonna ride itout with my boo, but I'm telling
you Ride it out with your boo.
Speaker 3 (00:23):
I like that.
I'm gonna hook you up.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
I feel like we're like the dynamic trio.
Like you didn't know, I'm likeyou're cool.
Yeah, like you needed it, Ienjoy this a lot.
Speaker 3 (00:31):
I do too.
I know I just need datingexperience legit.
I just need to like go ondating.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
I promise you, I'm like having to respond to this
guy.
He's like going hard in thepaint right now.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Ooh, I love it.
We love a little anxious of atap.
It it's kind of nice.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Usually it's just me.
Speaker 3 (00:45):
I like the ego feed, you know, which makes you feel
good sometimes, but theinteresting thing is, everyone
is like oh, she is so fuckinghot If I give them my Instagram
and then nothing comes from it.
And I'm like I genuinely wantto date, like ask me out, like
it's where we could talk aboutthat.
I don't like, I don't get it.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
We were talking about this yesterday.
So, first of all, welcome tothe lobby.
Yay, we have Jen Kroeschaw inour lobby.
She is a fellow podcaster.
She has her own podcast, theGen Z podcast, yes, which I
literally love the name.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
It's because I'm a delusional milf and I just I
resonate, you know, as a GenZ-er but I'm a millennial.
I don't know, my birthcertificate is bullshit, but
yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
So do you feel like you're aging like Benjamin
Button or Like a hundred percent?
Okay, got it.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
But do you know what it is?
There's a couple of things, andI don't mean to be like.
I grew up kind of ugly, so itgave me a really good
personality.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
I was for sure the ugly duckling.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
It's the best place to be, because when you, yeah,
and then living moreauthentically into my purpose
and who I am has really changedmy aura and my look.
I don't look like how I was,but it's because I'm living
authentically.
Finally, I was really.
You look back at pictures andit's crazy.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
I have like two comments on that, because
there's two things that I'veexperienced that are kind of
directly connected to it.
One never got my eyebrows doneuntil I was like 27.
It was like changing I lookedback at pictures, I was like
none of you were my friendsbefore.
My eyebrows were horrid yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
Horrid.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
So that is one thing, but then the other is, honestly
, I had terrible acne in highschool and I thought it was the
worst experience when I wasyounger and I use it as like a
perspective change because itwas actually the most health.
It was like the healthiestthing for me Because I was able
to really see the people thatwere there for me to actually be
a friend.
To actually be in my life,versus people that wanted me to
(02:35):
be there to benefit their party.
To benefit a moment of likehaving the hot guys around them.
Whatever the case was Totally,and I really got to see through
people and I think it helped meto create this like internal
compass of deciding like who'shealthy for me and who's not.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Yeah, well, I think there's something really
beautiful about being a latebloomer anyway, and that's what
I love about you is because youdo have such a young energy to
you and you're so beautiful.
Yes, you look so young.
Speaker 3 (03:03):
It's young energy.
But it's the weirdest thing andI'm friends with all the really
so I'm a hairstylist in LasVegas.
I also have a podcast that Itry to do out in Austin, but at
the salon I don't resonate withthe girls that are my age.
I am that way, so I have thewisdom of like living that long.
But like I'm not.
Like I'm with the young girlsand it's just cute.
We like call each other age gapcouples, like, and I just hang
(03:25):
out with them and no one wouldeven know.
But it is a little weird whenlike the younger like I do like
younger guys, but when theyreally young ones come up and
like ooh these are your girls,but like, I like.
I know I look a certain way, butI'm not.
I'm a little too old for you.
My boy.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
No, it's tough Like you may get caught up with the
right one you know, Maybe I hope, I'm hoping.
Speaker 2 (03:44):
Well, we just watch Jen get really excited because
so we always say that we keepour podcast pretty Austin based.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
And you're like kind of like dipping your toes in
Austin.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Yeah, and Roger, you're on first.
Yeah, roger, and.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
I were laughing because we brought you into the
collective gym here to podcastwith us.
It's a lot of hot, attractivemen.
It's ridiculous and I don'teven pay attention because I'm
so used to being here, but I'mlike this is new.
This is like Jen's newplayground.
Speaker 3 (04:12):
I can't even focus, that's true.
There's I don't know what it.
Why does Austin have so manybeautiful people and so many hot
guys?
Speaker 1 (04:20):
The craziest thing is I look like y'all's bouncer,
like we walk in here you lookand do Roger.
Everyone's looking at me likewhy are you with them?
I'm like hey, hey, hey.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
No, no, no, we already took Jen.
We went to dinner with Jen andwe took her to the what's that?
Burger spot.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
I always fucking.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Not a damn chance Not a damn chance.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
I always say can I have a?
Not a goddamn chance burger.
Speaker 3 (04:38):
They get me like.
They're like what?
What Best burger of my life?
No joke.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Thank you for taking me it's really incredible.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
It was incredible.
We had a lot of this morningtoo.
I'm like I want another one.
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
It was worth the hype .
Is it Michelin Star?
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Yeah, the Michelin Star chef.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
And his friend who was a skateboarder, came
together.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
They prepped this burger for like two years.
Speaker 3 (05:00):
Stop Wow, genuinely Incredible.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
And I mean, I feel like we were all getting hit on
when we were together last night.
It's like there's so manybeautiful.
Speaker 3 (05:11):
There's just more opportunity?
I don't know.
Listen, I grew up in Vegas andelementary I was born in Seattle
, but I was raised in Vegassince I was nine.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
What when in Seattle?
Speaker 3 (05:22):
Federal Way area.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
So I actually do know Seattle pretty well.
Speaker 3 (05:25):
Really Okay.
Every time I say Federal Way,everyone's like oh.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
This hat is actually a Seattle hat.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Shut up.
Everyone's like oh.
And I was like, is it ghetto?
And apparently where I grew upwas ghetto, but I didn't know.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
Whatever Federal Way it's like meh.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
Anyways, I grew up going to like Mariners Spring
Training and like I, actually Idon't want to be a fan.
I gave big lesbian vibes for awhile Growing up.
I played softball competitivelyand I was going to play
softball in college and then Ibroke my dad's heart and I was
like listen.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
What position Pitcher oh?
Speaker 3 (05:56):
my sister was a pitcher.
Yeah they're yeah, so.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
My sister did turn out to be gay.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Really no stop it, stop it.
I'm shocked that you're sayingthat you were like a tomboy
playing sports, because you'resuch like the epitome of a girly
girl I know I look reallyfeminine.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
but yeah, no, that's my sister, though my sister's
such a girly girl, yeah, I thinkI probably went like the
complete, like I went way on theother because I wasn't.
You know, my dad played collegebaseball.
I was his oldest.
I don't think I really had theopportunity to even choose
really, because I definitelyhave the personality of like a
cheerleader and a dancer, but Ialso was I was actually really
(06:34):
good at softball.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
You came out, he probably gave you like a man and
a ball.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Absolutely yeah.
There was like no choice.
Like I was playing softball andI was good at it, but by the
time I was like Listen, I listen, bro.
Like I would like to be a girl,yeah, yeah, and I wondered why
I didn't have a boyfriend and Iwas like, oh, so then I look
back, I get it.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
Did you finish high school in Seattle?
Speaker 3 (06:55):
So I moved to Vegas when I was nine.
My dad moved for a job.
Yeah, so I was raised in Vegas.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Okay, that's like such an interesting place, I
mean total.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
People have a really weird perception of Vegas.
It's actually so interesting,so it's very like clubby party
on the strip and then outside ofit it's like crazy suburbia.
It's really hard to be singlein Las Vegas because I live, I
have two kids and I, you wouldnever know.
Yeah, I'm a mom, but I like tobe referred as Milf, milf, milf
(07:28):
and yeah, so I live in thesuburbs, which is amazing, but
it's like very family orientedYou'd be shocked Like Vegas.
It's like really like chill,low key, boring.
So Go ahead.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
I was so confused too , because we were talking about
religion, yes, and you wereinvolved, like so heavily in
your religion in Vegas.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Yes, I think we'd be shocking to some.
Yeah, some people probablyassume there is no religion in
Vegas.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
Yeah, you would think there are a ton of.
I grew up Mormon there are tonsof Mormons in Las Vegas.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
That's crazy.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
But, yeah, christianity there are tons of
religions.
I know I know people get thisperception of Las Vegas and it's
like that downtown, but it'snot.
It's super family oriented.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
I think it's the same thing as, like New York, I'm
from.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
New York.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Everyone thinks I'm from, like one particular place
that they understand New York asand it's like, yes, I may have
been born there, but no, likethere's so many other places to
be raised.
And same thing with Texas.
Like everyone thinks, there'scattle everywhere.
Now, you may run into it, butit's not on every single street
corner.
Like it's just what you mayhave set up in your mind as an
(08:34):
epitome of a certain place.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
It's just not that I know it's so weird, like the
like misconceptions, absolutely,and I think it's so weird to
have a place that you can evenhave about places, cause when I
started thinking, about Vegasand you're talking about suburbs
and you're talking about Mormonreligion.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
It's hard to put it together.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
You're like I know, I know.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
I started thinking about that show.
Sister Wives yeah, and theywere in Vegas for a while.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
They were in Vegas.
Yeah, that's good, that's good.
Yeah, that's crazy yeah.
That's my connotation with itthough.
Well, yeah, I think itoriginated with polygamy, and
then, like the mainstream Mormonchurch obviously stopped long,
long, long time ago and then,like the people in Vegas, is
there something with the laws.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
So they were persecuted in the East and so
they all went West and settledWest.
So that's why you're going tosee a lot of Utah is like the
home base, but tons in Nevada,lots in California.
They just migrated West.
Speaker 1 (09:24):
And then isn't there a lot of Hawaiians in Vegas.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
Okay, yeah, and there's a lot of more.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Hawaiians are more.
Yeah, okay.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
So they call it the.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
I'm glad you can connect this.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
Yeah, they call it the 9th Island.
I believe.
Don't quote me on it.
It's either the 7th Island orthe 9th Island.
Sure, there's tons ofPolynesians, it's awesome.
Speaker 1 (09:39):
Vegas is like their New York City.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Yeah, yes, yeah, yep, totally Wow.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
Okay, that's amazing.
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Lots of Polynesians yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
Yeah, you were married for a long time.
It still so like throws my mindthat you have like two kids.
I know you were married.
Speaker 3 (09:53):
I know I think you're lying every second, I know I
feel like I'm in like twodifferent timelines really,
which is it's just weird.
Yeah, so I got married reallyyoung.
I grew up super conservative.
How'd you all meet Church?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
Got it.
Speaker 3 (10:07):
Yeah, and we you know we were.
We followed the religion andgot married.
We saved ourselves frommarriage, which I mean it was
great for then.
I will never do that again.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
I gotta ride that boat.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
I mean it was luckily it worked out.
I do think it's insane, though,to make a lifelong commitment
without doing that For sure, butluckily it worked out for me.
But I mean, I know a lot ofpeople who it doesn't.
You know.
Yeah, I got married super young, since I was 20.
And we got divorced.
We were married for 14 yearsand yeah, I mean we're still
(10:44):
good friends.
We both left our religiontogether, so we did that before.
It's funny, because growing upin the Mormon church, they kind
of tell you like if you leave,you lose everything.
And what ended up happening iswe did leave, and what it looks
like to the outside is we didlose everything.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
I guess we got divorced.
We regained so much more.
Speaker 3 (11:04):
And I'm talking to my ex about it and he's like you
know there's a reason for thatis because when you deconstruct,
you realize like this isn't foryou anymore and things fall
apart.
What looks on the outside,things are falling apart, but
really you're living inauthenticity and shedding it.
So it's funny, like you know,we kind of proved them right-ish
, but it's been hard a couple ofyears, but I'm thriving and I
(11:30):
want people to know that, likeyou, can absolutely be happy and
live a really fulfilled lifeand not have to be a part of
that you know, everyone can livedifferent lives.
But I think there's a little bitof like internal pressure maybe
that I feel like I kind ofproved them right-ish from the
outside perspective.
(11:50):
But it's important to me to besuccessful and to be in
authenticity and to live fullyso that people can see like
that's not the case, you've beenlied to.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Right, and is your definition of success with
someone or alone?
Speaker 3 (12:07):
Right now, my current journey is to.
I want to cultivate such ahealthy relationship with myself
, because I never had that.
I mean, I went straight from myparents' house to, literally
getting married.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
That's kind of where my question comes from.
Speaker 3 (12:17):
Yeah, and so it's been really lonely, to be on my
own, Scary.
But I know that my missionright now is I need to be so
okay being alone, and I'vekicked and screamed.
It's not easy.
It's not easy.
But to be so healthy alone, Imean I want to get remarried.
I'm not even opposed to havinganother kid If I'm going to be.
I mean, the funny joke would belike all my little friends at
(12:39):
the salon are like the young 20s, Like we'll probably all get
pregnant together and I'll belike old, like 42 year old.
You know, I mean that'sprobably how it's going to
happen.
But I'm totally open to havinganother baby.
I kind of want someone whodoesn't have kids and I'd rather
give him a child.
But I really do want to getremarried and I want to have
kids.
But I don't know where we'regoing with that.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
Well, it's a defined that version of success, right?
Speaker 3 (13:01):
So success looks like to me is living just so
authentically, like if you lookback at pictures, I just I was
unhappy because I've always beenwho I am.
I'm wild, I'm a free spirit.
I have this like radiant energy.
I'm a rebel, like.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
I really do have radiant energy, thank you.
Speaker 3 (13:17):
I just I was put in a family that I just I always
thought differently and itwasn't really accepted and
that's okay.
I just you look back atpictures and I look different
and it's because I'm livingauthentically.
So success looks like yeah, Iwant to be successful in my
career, but I ultimately justwant to be happy.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Yeah and I was talking to you about this
earlier too is like you know,what did your marriage kind of
look like?
Was it more like a traditionalmarriage or was he like the
provider protector?
Yeah, like I know.
One thing I asked you is like,were you like a Pilates
housewife?
No, were you still working?
Like, what did that situationlook like?
Because you and I are alwayshaving these conversations
(13:55):
Totally Like we're out heregrinding, working.
Yep, we're going to be likeourselves to keep some times.
We're so in our masculine yes.
Speaker 3 (14:02):
Yeah, I have a lot of thoughts on that actually.
No, I've never been a housewife.
So, because I grew up soconservatively, I was raised
like women kind of stay home.
They raised the kids and I havealways felt different and I'm a
natural rebel by heart.
So I was like fuck you, you'renot going to tell me what to do.
I'm never going to stay homewith my kids.
I want to be a mom and I'mgoing to be a good mom, but you
can't tell me, because I'm awoman, that I need to stay home.
(14:24):
Right, absolutely.
I'm a little too far on theboss bitch side, okay, and I
hustled.
I've always worked.
Yeah, I'm a little tired now.
Speaker 1 (14:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
I'm a little tired now and I think my traditional
marriage always monogamous.
I'm a monogamy girl, but Iwould say that we both worked.
I've always worked.
He provided for a long time.
You know I was building my, sothis is interesting.
I went to hair school rightafter high school.
(14:55):
I worked at Caesar's Palace onthe strip this crazy hair salon
and I got anxiety and I was likeI hate hair, I hate this, and I
quit hair for like seven yearsand I went back to school for a
paralegal degree so freakingrandom.
And then one day I was like I'mtoo fun to be in a cubicle.
This is weird.
So I went back to doing hairand I just realized I do love
(15:16):
hair.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
I feel like you could make anything fun.
Yeah, it's to be fair.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
It was, but the cubicle is not my place.
I was just like meh.
But when I got back into hair Ibarely made any money and he
was like I got you, I'll provideyou know.
And then it ended up being Ibecame the breadwinner.
They have grants.
The interesting thing is theroles started becoming reversed
and I think that that ultimatelyled to kind of the demise of my
(15:42):
marriage.
There's lots of things.
Our roles were reversed and itwas a weird dynamic, I would
also say.
When we got married, we kind oftrauma bonded.
We were so young I neededsomeone to save me.
I didn't really have emotionalsafety when I grew up.
Obviously they're a greatfamily, they provide it for me
financially, but I've alwaysbeen different.
(16:03):
I did not have emotional safetyand so I desperately needed
someone to save me and he camein.
We both had trauma, we bonded,he saved me and then eventually
I realized I don't want to besaved anymore and I don't think
he wanted to save.
We both kind of got to thispoint where we were like holy
shit, we were so young.
(16:23):
Now we're both healing, butwe're healing on different
trajectories, and I just waslike I don't wanna be saved
anymore.
But it's extremelyuncomfortable because I leaned
on him so much to you know.
I went from my parents to himand then, once I started healing
and some of the childhood stuff, I was like I need to do things
(16:44):
on my own and we both just satdown.
It was a very healthy likenobody did anything bad.
We sat down and we had somereally hard conversations.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
You sound healthy now , even on the back end.
Speaker 3 (16:52):
Yeah, we're really good friends.
It just was that we sat downand we had really hard
conversations and when we wereboth starting to heal, we
realized one we trauma bondedand we were little.
We're not the same people thatwe were.
How can we make this work?
And ultimately we decided Ithink we need to let ourselves
go to grow and I didn't thinkthat we both thought that we
couldn't achieve the growth thatwe needed together.
(17:14):
For me, I needed to be aloneand I needed to be my own savior
and my own safety and not relyon anybody.
And for him, he didn't need tobe saving someone, he needs to
save himself.
It was really painful to justhave that realization, like
nobody did anything bad.
It just was at that point wherewe were like we've grown apart,
we were babies.
(17:34):
We're healed.
Now we're on our path tohealing.
I think we need to letourselves go and we kind of
stepped away and we said let'sdo the work and grow and if we
get back together, cool.
But honestly, I don't see itlike that at all.
I think our energies are justso different.
We're really good friends, butit's never gonna go that way
again.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
I think I came into this episode wanting to ask you
so many questions about why themarriage ends, and was there
fighting happening likeinfidelity?
But just the way that you talkabout your ex cause we say this
all the time the way that youtalk about your ex says a lot
about you as a person.
Speaker 3 (18:09):
It's really important for me.
I mean, there have been timeswhere I've been extremely
frustrated with him post-divorceFinancially, like I am on my
own.
So, I think I don't want peopleto get it twisted Like I'm
doing everything, like you know,like on my own.
Yeah, but he's extremelysupportive.
Yeah, nobody did anything wrongand I think people wanted that
juice and I'm like, honestly, weleft our religion and we went
(18:32):
into deep therapy to deconstructand we realized we did a lot of
things for other people and weneed to grow and I don't know
how to achieve the growth thatwe both individually need
together.
I mean, my growth was I wasdepending on him too much.
I needed to be on my own savior.
I needed to be uncomfortablealone.
I need to be alone and be okaywith that.
(18:53):
This is probably private, butthrough our marriage, a lot of
times he would say you need memore than you want me.
And I thought a lot about thatand I was like, unfortunately,
because I was so emotionallydamaged when I was younger, my
needs were greater than my wantsand I needed to someone to save
me and I loved him and I wantedhim, but my needs were greater
(19:15):
than my wants and I neededsomeone to save me.
So I'm really trying to work onbeing my own savior and being
my own.
And it's hard, like it's reallyuncomfortable.
For the first time in my life,I have to heal, like I have to
self soothe.
I can't rely on my family.
I can't rely on this guy that Iwas with forever to save me.
It's me.
Speaker 1 (19:34):
I think that you bring up a valuable lesson as
well.
It's like you're betting onyourself, and I think when you
bet on yourself, it'suncomfortable.
It's so painful Like there'sprobably some minutes, hours and
days and weeks, months.
Speaker 3 (19:47):
Who knows how long the time for it needs to be or
what it is where you really justhave to motivate yourself to
put one foot in front of theother and I look back and I'm
like I'm so proud of myselfbecause I'm coming to Austin
once a month.
I could never have done that.
I started going on solo tripswhen we were starting to
separate.
I have never done any travelingalone, sleeping alone.
I couldn't do it.
I would have to call him.
I would get anxiety at night andsleep.
(20:09):
And here I am every month, likecoming to Austin alone, and I'm
like it's hard to see yourprogress because it's still
uncomfortable, but I'm like,damn, you're doing it OK.
Speaker 2 (20:18):
Yeah, and that's like I feel like I could be wrong,
but it seems like part of yourhealing process is like
podcasting too.
You're really doing that foryourself.
So is that kind of whatmotivated you to get into
podcasting?
Speaker 3 (20:30):
Yeah, Originally, my personality has just always been
so big Like I feel like there'ssomething bigger, like I need
it to be out there to talk topeople I do hair.
Speaker 1 (20:39):
We have two guests here because your personality is
so big.
Speaker 3 (20:42):
No, and I do hair and it's really fun and I interact
with my guests.
And then I started making likegoofy reels on my Instagram and
that brought me joy.
But originally I started thepodcast as like a creative
outlet I wanted to talk about, Imean, going through divorce.
People are so shitty, likepeople are so stupid, and
actually I'm like such a loving,fun, kind person and I even a
(21:03):
little.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
You're going through a breakup, people are shitty, so
a divorce Like I can onlyimagine.
Speaker 3 (21:06):
I hate people.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
And I hate saying that, because it's like Because
then again you still love people.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
Yeah, I guess.
No, yeah, I just.
I started it as a way to be,like you know, like it's a
cathartic healing experience,and I wanted to talk about like
getting divorced and people and,like you know, stop giving
unsolicited advice.
And then, you know, in thedating world and then I want to
kind of niche down more intodating but, like life and funny,
I don't know where it'll evolve, but I'm really excited and I
(21:33):
want it to just keep going andI'm just kind of giving myself
grace to like let it evolvenaturally and just Well, I get.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
yeah, I'll kind of pay you back on your question to
where I feel as if your podcastand like asking more about it
you're one of those podcastswhere I listen to it and yours
is like a journey.
Speaker 3 (21:49):
Yeah, it is Hearing it in a higher journey.
It's going to be veryinteresting to where it ends.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
I wish the niche was.
The answer was journey.
Right, like if you could putlike what type of podcast it was
.
It was like journey.
Speaker 3 (22:01):
Yeah, because people are like what type of podcast?
I'm like, you know, we talkabout healing, we have a little
comedy, we have a little popculture, we have dating, we have
divorce, like I don't know,it's a lot, it's just life.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
You know what I think it is, though it's you there
you go.
That's what it is, it'sauthentically you and that's
what people are going toresonate with.
You know, and I think that'swhat's so cool about it and,
like your experience, is so goodfor people to hear, because,
getting married so young, I'msure you weren't even on dating
apps ever, oh never.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
The divorce?
Never, yeah, no, I barely hadany dating experience.
I think I had like one littleboyfriend in high school and it
barely was anything.
So that's terrifying.
Dating apps are wild.
Like I don't even like yeah.
So I mean, I've been divorcedfor two years.
I've been trying.
I'm like I go like we talkedabout it yesterday, like I go
like ebb and flow.
Right now I'm off of them, Idon't want anything to do with
(22:50):
them, I'm exhausted.
I'm just like catch me in thewild, catch me in the wild, boys
, please.
That's so funny, you heard ithere first.
Catch me in the wild.
Speaker 2 (23:00):
They're already trying to.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
I'm receiving DMs as we are, literally.
He got one DM guys, buthonestly I'm open.
He's on it right now.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
I'm open to all the DMs.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
Send it to Rod, she's single, so I am single, yes.
Speaker 1 (23:13):
And it's different too, because usually Cass is
like, hey, for anyone that'ssingle, I'm here.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
Holler, hello, Ratchett girl yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
That is funny.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
Well, have you been in a relationship with anyone
since your divorce?
I?
Speaker 3 (23:29):
dated, so I call it the bad pancake theory.
I always say this have you guysheard about that?
Speaker 1 (23:33):
No, I feel like I know where you're going, but no.
Speaker 3 (23:35):
So I feel like after a long-term relationship, the
first on my mind is love.
So in a batch of pancakes, thefirst one is shit, it's like.
It's literally like burned andwhatever.
And then the rest get likegolden and fluffy.
So I feel like you gotta haveyour bad pancake.
I did try to date a guy.
I haven't had anyone that Iwould say is my boyfriend.
I dated two guys, maybeconsistently one for two months,
(23:56):
one for a month.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
No, Look at you.
Speaker 3 (23:59):
Yeah, I wish Roger.
No, that would be awesome.
We also talked about I don'thave a roster.
I like I just am not that girl.
I would rather just pour myenergy into one person and then,
when it's done, it's done, moveon.
I've dated, I've gone on lotsof first dates, but they really
haven't gone anywhere.
I dated two guys like a littlebit more consistently, but only
for like a month or two, like init.
(24:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:21):
I guess it's you bring up, or we brought it up in
our conversation with you thedifference of masculine and
feminine energy.
Do you feel as if men right noware too fragile to deal with
versions of maybe you havingkids or having an ex-husband?
Yeah, it's interesting Likedoes that get in the way of your
dating experience?
Speaker 3 (24:41):
I think it does.
I had one guy that was likekind of flirt with me over DMs
and he I can kind of sniff out,I think, because I'm a mom and I
do like younger guys.
I do like them, but I'm alsoopen if you're like hot and have
young energy and you're older.
But I like younger guys becauseI naturally have younger energy
.
I don't resonate with being 38.
(25:01):
And this one guy was liketrying to flirt with me.
I also think there's like a milkfantasy which is like kind of
fun on the ego, but at the sametime I'm like, listen, like at
this point in my life I want todate, like intentionally date.
But yeah, he was like in my DMs, like hitting me up and I'm
like if you want to take me on adate, then great, but like this
(25:23):
, whatever, and he goes well.
I just I have some reservations.
I'm like cool, hit me with them.
He's like I've never datedanyone with kids and I'm like
that's fact and that's valid.
I actually personally don'twant to date someone with kids.
I don't want to blend families.
I would rather marry someonewho doesn't have a baby and give
him a baby, like that's justlike yeah, but I was really
(25:43):
worried when I got yeah, I wasreally worried when I got
divorced because I was kind oflike a little bitter.
I'm like damn, like I'm this ageand like no one's going to want
to date me with two kids and Ialso yeah, it's a lot, I don't
know.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
I said that's a lie.
Oh, that's right.
Speaker 3 (25:57):
Yeah, I thought it was like I don't know it could
have.
It could impact my dating.
I honestly like things aren'treally going anywhere.
So, yeah, but I don't know.
My kids have a great dad.
No one's trying, I'm not tryingto be stepdaddy.
I also am used to working, so Idon't need anyone to come and
save me.
So I'm just like look like Idon't know.
(26:18):
It's tricky.
Yeah, it probably does impactdating.
I just don't really know aboutit.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Well, we were talking about this the other day.
It's like there's so manydifferent timelines on women and
I like that.
It looks like because you knowI'm 29,.
We talked about this Likepeople could be looking at me
like why is she single?
Why is she single?
Yeah, and then someone couldcontradict you oh, she has kids.
It's like who the right person?
Speaker 3 (26:41):
for us.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Totally Doesn't care.
Speaker 3 (26:43):
Yeah, and if you get to know me, like yeah, and then
we just address, I'm just likethere's no pressure, like let's
just see if we vibe, and then wecan have kind of those
conversations.
Also, my kids are so freakingcool and easy Like they're not
like in diapers, you knowthey're, and they're just so
sweet Like they're good.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
And are they?
I think that's something, toothat comes up, Cause I had a
friend of mine that I grew upwith who his parents were
divorced but very comfortabletogether.
Like literally friends, and somuch so that his dad was the
coach of our basketball team.
My dad was the coach and hisstepdad was the coach.
Speaker 3 (27:15):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
So like they were all the coach in the same team.
Speaker 3 (27:17):
That's so cool.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
And all the kids on the team were like this is weird
for you.
Huh yeah, it just wasn't.
It really wasn't.
Speaker 3 (27:24):
I think that just requires an emotional maturity
that I would.
I would love that.
For sure I'm also aware, likeobviously that's weird, but I
would love it?
Speaker 1 (27:31):
Are your kids comfortable with you dating?
Speaker 3 (27:34):
I make jokes about it to try to ease it up.
I haven't really.
I introduced one, the guy Idated for a couple months, but
as a friend and I don't know, Ithink they're more open to it.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Were they sniffing?
Speaker 3 (27:47):
it out.
No, she bought it.
Yeah, you know she was like ohcool, like you have a friend,
they're very open to like.
They just don't really wantlike another dad.
They're just like oh, it's likea bonus friend.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (27:58):
Like yeah, but I don't know.
I think we've done a reallygood job of like we really
haven't gone, like no one'sreally moved on, like it's crazy
.
You know, fast, we both havereally tried to do healing, so
they haven't really met anyone.
I think they're open to it.
I make jokes all the time.
I even make jokes about datingaliens at this point, honestly,
when they confirmed like thealiens, I was like ooh, daddy's
(28:19):
home, like dating pool they'reprobably hot honestly, If
they're over six feet and healed.
hit me up, they probably are hotAlien or not?
Honestly, maybe we should do itfor the plot, so what?
So I kept saying like she sawlike a UFO in the sky and I was
like, oh, daddy's home andthat's like big.
And she's like stop, mom, I'mlike A normal thing out there in
Nevada.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
Is that fair?
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Oh, all the time.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
Like alien talk.
Speaker 3 (28:41):
Yeah, Like area 51.
Anyways, I was like oh, that'syour step daddy baby.
She didn't like that, shedidn't think that was funny, you
both guys' daddy.
Oh, I love it Absolutely.
I love calling a guy daddy.
I will gladly that's like thatsubmission energy, I think so
we've talked about this becauseme and you are in our masculine
and, like I have a freakingcareer and all that I want to
(29:01):
submit to a man.
I just haven't met a man thatlike I'm worthy, yeah, and also
that doesn't get intimidated bymy success, like it's.
I'm not trying to emasculateyou, it's just like you know, I
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
Do you feel like?
Do you feel like men's Egos area little bit more fragile than
women's?
Speaker 3 (29:20):
I don't know.
Okay, I don't know.
Yeah, I don't know what youguys think.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
I feel I feel like they are.
I feel like I've had a hardtime Dating, that I feel like
I've seen men be a little bitmore fragile with their ego.
In my experience, or it's likethey're needing their ego fed
and I haven't even met them inperson.
Yeah so I'm like how am I gonnatell you You're so great,
you're so hot?
And like, yeah, I miss you.
Yeah, I can't wait to see you.
(29:46):
I'm like you haven't even madethe effort to meet up with me in
person.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
I have found I think I'm gonna start so the most
successful recent Interactionswith men and the relationship
they have not seen my Instagram.
Yeah and I'm at the point whereI went.
So it's like on the dating apps, I'm off of them.
But when I was on the datingapps they'd be like what's your
Instagram?
I give it to them and theninstantly like nothing happens.
And I thought a lot about thatand I I don't know if I and like
(30:11):
I have no idea, but once guyssee my Instagram, it's like they
don't ask me out and my friendslike, oh, you're there,
intimidated, and I'm like, ifyou got to know me, I am not
intimidating them the slightest.
I'm down to earth, like I don'tget it and I'm also kind of
goofy on my Instagram.
So I don't know if like mypersonality is too much for them
or they just see that like oh,she's like happy and independent
, like is that fragile to theirego?
(30:32):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
I think if they don't have the right intentions by
you and this is me as a guy-yeah they don't have the right
intentions by you and you have apodcast.
They're like, holy shit, she'sgonna out me on the podcast.
Speaker 3 (30:45):
Yeah, and I did do a couple episodes.
Yeah, and I did do it.
It was fucking awesome.
That could be scary, yeah, somepeople and I'm trying not, I'm
not trying to be the TaylorSwift of freakin you know
podcast and try to like blastguys.
But um, I did talk about onetime my first interaction with a
man Divorce.
He had a broken penis.
(31:05):
Well, that's I mean there is no.
I know, I know even my sluttyfriends were like they haven't
had the pleasure I have.
What does that mean?
Speaker 1 (31:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (31:14):
I flew to New York to meet this guy I met one time in
Las Vegas and I like I don'tknow what I was thinking anyways
.
Speaker 1 (31:21):
But like why wouldn't he tell you in advance?
He?
Speaker 3 (31:23):
told me the day after it just it was freaking weird.
I was so uncomfortable, it wasjust weird and something was not
right and I was like what thehell?
And then the next day he's likeah, babe, babe, did you know
that I have?
I broke my dick and like withhis British accent I was like
what, what?
I can't believe.
I've even talking about this onthe phone.
I did an episode about it.
But I was like what?
And he's like, oh yeah, oh yeah, he goes.
(31:44):
I went to be that, I went to bethe with the boys and he's like
I was doing so many drugs andLike I couldn't get it up.
So then I took a Viagra andthen I had sex with this girl
for five hours and then broke mydick and I was like what?
And like let me just give youthis picture Jen Kroosha.
Like I, like I grew up Mormon.
I'm like why am I with this guy?
Yeah, like I don't.
I don't even drink, you know.
So I'm just like what?
(32:05):
Is this the first guypost-aboard?
Uh-huh, yeah that's and there'sno other reason why that had to
happen.
Speaker 1 (32:10):
I wish you would have seen my eyes.
Speaker 3 (32:11):
I'm listening, I'm like there's no other reason it
had to be in for the plot or thepodcast, like there's no other
reason why that would happen.
I'm like what?
Speaker 1 (32:20):
there's a level of divine timing that's like you
think the grass is greener,sometimes not really not like my
one of my Relationships.
Speaker 2 (32:29):
as soon as I got out of it, the first guy hooked up
with he was so well endowed andI was like wow, like yeah, I've
been missing out, like notrealizing not everyone is like
that, yeah, I just got luckywith the first one.
Speaker 3 (32:41):
You know, I do want to say something I I don't want
people to think like oh, I gotdivorced, yeah, grass is greener
.
I never, ever ever was doingthat and so that I could, the
grass is greener.
I don't think the grass isgreener.
I think the grass is greenwhere you freaking water it.
Speaker 1 (32:55):
That's what I'm saying.
It's like you don't seem thatway.
No, I think your point is yes.
Speaker 3 (32:59):
Yeah, absolutely it's valid.
But yeah, I didn't get divorcedbecause, like, I wanted to like
go party and like have fun andlike whatever experience that.
But yeah, the grass is not.
The grass is green where youwater it.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
Maybe not the broken dick.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
I was trash garbage.
Yeah minute I left I was likeblock I don't even know like
that was and I was like you knowwhat?
That's cool.
That's the plot it had to havebeen.
I don't know, that was crazy.
Speaker 2 (33:26):
You can throw some water on it, but I don't think
it's gonna fix it.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
I'm like another Viagra.
Speaker 3 (33:30):
Oh, I know, I just being him where I was like we're
gonna be cool friends thisweekend, like we're not.
And I wasn't in my villain eralike from like hug to like I was
like like you, dapp them up,yeah.
I wasn't not in my villain era.
I was so nice like this.
If that happened now, I'd belike pounce and bro, I'm doing a
solo trip in New York.
We had like two days left.
So I was like, and luckily wehad separate hotels, thank
goodness.
I was like alright, um, so gohome, I'll see you in the
(33:53):
morning, because we have likesome tourist things to hit like.
I was still like, I was so nice, yeah, and I hung out with him
the whole weekend like asfriends, because I was like this
is freaking weird.
Yeah, we like didn't vibe atall, it was just.
It was like I like.
Speaker 2 (34:05):
I like I've said villain era, though, because
sure, sometimes I'm like, yeah,I'm in my villain.
Good, yeah, am I really in myvillain era?
No, or am I just havingboundaries?
Speaker 3 (34:14):
It's bad one not in your villain era.
It's just, you have boundaries.
Yeah, I just was so nice, I waslike, oh, that was
uncomfortable.
Okay, we're gonnacompartmentalize that and we're
gonna.
We have that.
You know, we have all thesethings that we need to hit ice
if you need.
Speaker 2 (34:27):
It's nice that, like you, had your own hotel room.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
Thank, goodness, thank goodness, I yeah that's if
you're ever gonna travel forlike a person you need your
space, like I don't know.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
If things get weird, you just don't know what you're
walking in on.
Speaker 3 (34:38):
Yeah, and that was just a dumb judgment call, like
on me.
I think I was just like, oh,that would be fun, no, at the
same time.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
It's like I know people that have met out with
other people in another city.
Speaker 3 (34:48):
Yeah, like state and they stay with that.
Speaker 2 (34:50):
Yeah, no, no I think you made the right move someone
gentlemanly, if they can affordto and they should they should
they absolutely you want me tocome, which I'm also down.
Speaker 3 (35:00):
I like to come hang out, but I love to travel.
But, yeah, no, I, I have tohave my own yeah, that's like a
mutual respect kind of yeah.
Speaker 1 (35:09):
Yeah that's like one of those learning moments for me
where I'm like, if I ever am inthat scenario, you have to, I
would offer that.
Speaker 3 (35:15):
Yeah, I need to, yeah and it's just weird, like
cohabiting, like you got a poop,see at some point, like you
know it's too close.
It's too close, just like.
Give me my own space, yeah, areyou.
Speaker 2 (35:25):
I'm weird about like personal space.
I don't know if you are, butlike there's a guy I've been
dating.
He took me on two dates okayand he's like trying to come
over tonight and like hang out,Like he's like I want to do
something chill.
Speaker 3 (35:36):
Oh yeah, Well we know what that means.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
Me like, literally, I feel like someone coming into
my space is the same as themcoming inside me, because it's
so like my Person.
Yeah bubble for you.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
I would rather have them at my house, though, than
going away.
It's cuz this makes me morecomfortable.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
Yeah, okay, more safe , yeah, yeah and then I guess
it's so funny you both bringthis up right, like you talk
about what makes you feel safe.
You talk about kind of likeyou're limited or you're just
boundaries in general.
Do you think you choose yourpartners the same way that you
did before you were married, orI differently after divorce.
Speaker 3 (36:16):
I feel like I I'm very self-aware.
I've done a lot of healing intheir work.
There's still some childhoodstuff that I'm trying to work
through.
Yeah, I have noticed that I'mattracting emotionally
unavailable people, and thatbrings me to pause and wonder if
I'm actually emotionallyunavailable or it's the universe
being like you still haven'tyou sell some childhood wounds.
(36:37):
You are not going to get peoplethat are I.
Sometimes I'm like damn.
I'm being like divinelyprotected, because things are
just not working out for sure,and I'm like, okay, yeah, yeah,
I'm a track I'm not attracting.
I'm aware I don't want that.
I can see it in partners andI'm like I'm not repeating
cycles, I'm not gonna do that.
Yeah, there's.
You know, I've come way too farto like settle or to be in the
(36:59):
same situation.
I'm not gonna do that.
Yeah, but I am attracting weirdon it emotionally unavailable
guys I.
So if you're emotionallyunavailable and you have Don't
DM her.
No yummy, All heal real fast.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
Did they say that, like who you're dating sometimes
is like a reflection of how yousee yourself For sure.
So I mean I've had the samesituation happen where I'm like
am I loving ourselves?
I don't think so, because ifyou look at you and I, I feel
like we're both women who dopour into ourselves.
All the time, so I don't thinkit's that we're not emotionally
available.
Speaker 3 (37:32):
I'm aware I have childhood wounds of wanting to
be chosen.
Okay, and so I.
Dear brothers and sisters, yes,yeah, but it's very interesting
.
They don't have the sameexperience growing up as I do.
I think I just was differentand so you know.
Speaker 1 (37:46):
And you were the oldest.
Speaker 3 (37:47):
And yeah, and now, as a parent, I realize you don't
have a blueprint or manual, no,so but you were the lesson child
.
Yeah, yeah.
So I want to be chosen and Ifind that or I like want to be
like fought for almost, and Irealize where that's coming from
.
It's more of like an anxiousattachment style because it's
like a childhood wound.
So I'm trying to be more secure.
Speaker 2 (38:07):
I feel like that's kind of feminine, though it is.
Speaker 3 (38:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
Yeah, it is yeah.
It is Because we don't want tobe the pursuers, like we want a
man to choose us you want to becourted.
Speaker 3 (38:16):
Exactly I want to be courted.
But I do realize that, like,relationships are a mirror.
So I'm like okay, you reallywant a guy to choose you.
You're not choosing yourself.
So how does that look like?
How can I turn inward andchoose myself?
Speaker 1 (38:27):
Yeah, and I think that's, and still meet somebody.
Speaker 3 (38:30):
Yeah, like right now, it's like I'm still just trying
to work on.
Like you know, I choose you,jen, I choose you.
I'm trying to repeat to myselflike I choose you, like you're
freaking awesome, like you know,things like that, but I think
they're a mirror, like so.
Speaker 1 (38:43):
I remember when I was a kid I would always like I was
oddly like introspective and Iwould look at things just very
differently.
Speaker 3 (38:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
And I would always look and like have you either of
you seen those couples thatwalk around and you're like,
okay, one person is blatantlyattractive and the other person
is blatantly not attractive.
Speaker 3 (39:01):
I know I never want to be in a couple like that.
I want to be like I want themto be, like damn, and then
sometimes.
Speaker 2 (39:06):
Barbie and Ken.
Speaker 3 (39:06):
Yeah, yeah, how are couple lives.
Speaker 1 (39:09):
I'm like is that person either that confident in
themselves or is the otherperson that?
Do they lack confidence inthemselves that much that they
have?
Speaker 3 (39:19):
to.
I think it's an energy, it'sphysical.
I think it's an energy thing.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
I hear you, I hear you.
That's kind of why, where Iasked the question, I'm asking
Well, it's almost like prettyprivilege, does it connect?
Speaker 2 (39:28):
To right, we don't choose these human flesh cells
right.
So it's like if you'reattracted to someone's energy,
like even Jen's energy is sobeautiful, like you can just
feel it.
Thank you, it's radiant.
Speaker 3 (39:42):
I had the last guy I dated.
I learned a lot from him.
He was more in his masculine.
He our culturally were sodifferent it would have never
worked out, but I reallyappreciated that he was in his
masculine.
And one thing that he wouldcompliment me on and, like you
know, like we would have sexystuff but like he would never
compliment me over text on mybody.
(40:02):
He would always be like I missyour energy and that to me is
like a top tier compliment.
I want that, like I love that.
I'm like, oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
That's awesome.
Speaker 3 (40:11):
But I think it's an energy thing and yeah, I mean,
or I don't know.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
It is fascinating, though, like if you'll see, like
someone like that's soattractive, with someone that's
kind of like average, and you'relike how did you get?
Speaker 1 (40:23):
them.
But it's like everyone hasdifferent kind of thing, like I
could never be with someone I'mnot physically attracted to but
maybe someone could like I don'tknow Like yeah, it's like
something to ponder on Cause,like, when I look at it even
from childhood to being an adult, I'm just sometimes I'm like
that's too much to think about.
I don't want to look that wayanymore.
Speaker 2 (40:44):
It depends on what you're looking for, like if I
just wanted a husband.
I could go get a husband.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
And.
Speaker 2 (40:49):
I wanted a soul mate With that.
Sexual compatibility isdifferent, right?
Speaker 3 (40:54):
I also think like it's.
I try to give grace because,like for me as a mom, like I'm a
little bit insecure about likejust my body will never be
unless I have surgery to fix it,which I have had, like my boobs
fixed, which is great, but likemy stomach, it's always a
little bit and I'm waiting, I'mholding out because I don't want
to have that and like I want tosee how my life plays out and
(41:15):
if I get the opportunity to havea baby again, I'll do that and
then get it fixed.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
Oh wow, that's smart.
Speaker 3 (41:20):
Yeah, but.
Speaker 1 (41:21):
I'm sure that could have complications.
Speaker 3 (41:23):
Yeah, I think it just get crazy and so, but it is
like I do get insecure because,you know, look like I am
ultimately a mom.
I work so freaking hard, like Ialways say, like moms or milfs
can never stay complacent,because then they just become
moms, yeah, which is fine, butI'm trying to work out my body,
but no matter what, like I'vehad babies, so my skin's always
gonna be a little bit like youknow, on my stomach, which is
(41:46):
fine.
But yeah, I'm always like okay,I would hope that you would
give me grace.
Like I work as hard as I can onmy body.
For the same time, like I havehad babies, I'm not gonna be
like a hot 24 year old model,you know, sure.
Speaker 2 (41:59):
Do you feel like a cause?
I feel this personally like acompetitiveness, almost as I
started to age into my likelater twenties.
A little bit I'm like oh shit,Like I can't keep up with these,
like 22 year olds anymore, andit's like a little.
It's kind of a mind fuck it is.
Watching yourself age as awoman and then still be trying
to date and find your person.
Speaker 1 (42:20):
As a male too.
It's like it's real.
Speaker 2 (42:22):
Roger, you're so pretty, I'm like yeah.
Speaker 3 (42:23):
Roger it's so rude.
How do you wake up in themorning Like it's kind of rude?
She knows.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
I'm very ritualistic and routine.
But it's like a lot of thingsyou're both bringing up where
it's like that competitivespirit.
I have that.
Speaker 3 (42:34):
Like.
Speaker 1 (42:35):
I'm very competitive.
And then also the things I knowI'm not gonna have that same
lusty look that I did when I wasyounger but, there's certain
qualities and things that I canreally focus on and put my
energy into where I'm like I cando something about it yeah.
Speaker 3 (42:51):
I was gonna say I am a big fan of doing anything
cosmetic that you want to.
I try to keep it really natural, cause I think whenever you
pour your into yourself, likethe universe rewards you Like
yeah, like if you want it.
I'm a huge fan of Botox.
I think it's amazing.
However, I will say I have anenergy healer in Vegas and she's
like you know, you can talkback to that voice in your head,
right, and I was like what?
Speaker 2 (43:13):
Don't fuck me up.
Speaker 3 (43:14):
So now, when I'm like , oh, I'm like this, I'm like
shut the fuck up, like I'll justbe, like what do you mean?
And I'm like stop it, because Ithink like if you really go
down that rabbit hole of likefeeling that like competitive
cause we're gonna age, it's sogood.
It's like yeah, stop it.
And I've been trying to catchmyself like now.
No, because I think if you havethe energy of like deep self
love, you're like, I'm confidentin who I am and what I have to
(43:35):
offer.
Like, yeah, like the youngerones, but they don't have the
wisdom of like and the emotionalintelligence you know.
So it's like you do offer agingis good.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
There's something.
There's something Get someBotox About being a woman and
not being a girl.
Speaker 3 (43:50):
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (43:51):
And like loving yourself a little bit more each
year that comes with it.
Speaker 3 (43:55):
And I think also it's hard embracing like woman's
body compared to being a girl'sbody.
So you see these really hotyoung girls but you're like, oh
man, like you haven't kind oftransitioned into that woman
body and that's a level of selflove and acceptance that you
need.
Speaker 1 (44:09):
But it shows up in other places in your life too.
Speaker 2 (44:12):
Yeah, that woman body is almost hotter though.
Speaker 3 (44:14):
I would hope.
So I mean like look, I got somecurves, like yeah.
Speaker 1 (44:18):
It's, I think, as a guy to offer the answer.
I think there's a version tothe answer where it's like it's
sadistic, If you really do loveand like, focus your energy on
that younger looking body andimage Versus like hey, sometimes
things happen.
Where like you meet somebody,it is what it is.
Speaker 3 (44:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (44:37):
Age gaps happen, right.
But then there's a version of,yes, what you just said with
self love and what you talkabout with the version of
competition and just reallyworking on yourself.
When you see a mature woman inher power, that is, I mean,
that's a thing of like radiantenergy that you walk away and
you don't forget.
So it's like you have aninteraction with that person and
(45:00):
even if you don't interact withthat person, you just you get a
smell of their perfume,whatever it is, and when you
come across that person, youdon't forget.
So a woman in her powers is awoman.
That is like you control thegame.
Speaker 3 (45:15):
The game doesn't control you.
But I will say, as a woman,like we've been conditioned to
hate ourselves, like by society.
So no matter, even if we're inour power, we have to fight
those voices, because it'salways gonna come up.
Speaker 1 (45:26):
The talking back is huge, like I think, that.
Speaker 3 (45:27):
Yeah, she finally was like you know, you can actually
talk back to that voice, right?
And if you have to be soaggressive and be like shut the
fuck up, you stupid bitch, likeI don't care what it is, but
like it immediately is like oh,okay, yeah yeah, that's what's
hard, too, about like beingsingle and really sitting with
yourself in your own thoughts.
Speaker 2 (45:46):
You start being like self aware of some of the
negative shit that like comes uptoo.
Speaker 3 (45:51):
Yeah, but like as a again as a woman, like we've
been conditioned to hateourselves.
You know, I'm in the beautyindustry too.
It's like that.
You know which is?
Speaker 1 (45:58):
tough, yeah, it is yeah, so.
It's almost like how many timesa day does somebody say hey,
look at this picture, I wannalook like this?
Speaker 3 (46:05):
Yeah, and I'm like what do you love about it?
Because that girl is a sizezero and she's six feet tall and
all that space A model yeah,I'm like I can give you
extensions, like what you know.
I know it's a little twisted.
Speaker 2 (46:17):
Yeah, I mean, I think there was one thing I wanted to
ask you.
Yeah, if there's anything youcould tell your younger self,
like when you were in your 20s,like what would it be?
Speaker 3 (46:29):
Even in my 20s, I feel like my you are enough.
You are enough.
I think that's always been thetheme like you are enough.
And just because you aredifferent than your tribe does
not make you crazy or not goodenough.
You were planted to shakethings up and sometimes that's
(46:51):
an isolating journey and that'sokay.
But you're gonna make it andit's gonna be okay.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
Love that, love that, and then I guess I'll follow up
with that on a question we liketo ask all our guests like
what's the biggest misconceptionabout you that you would love
to offer clarity towards.
Speaker 3 (47:05):
I look a certain way, but I am not that way.
I think you would look at meand think like I'm just, I'm
extremely down to earth and Ithink it's because I grew up
ugly.
I don't know, no, I just mypersonality is like a lot more
like down to earth.
I'm very warm Maybe you can seethat from my social media, but
it's funny.
Like I just would have peoplelike oh, they think I'm a
(47:27):
certain way, or like I'm like a,like a rich housewife I'm like
what.
Like no, I'm just like no, notat all.
Speaker 1 (47:33):
Yeah, so I think maybe my looks I'm, I don't know
, maybe no, I mean, and that'sit's a moment to all like, this
is your stage, so it's a momentwhere you get to reflect back
and somebody ever asks you thequestion in the future.
You're like, hey, I was on inthe lobby and they'll listen in
on episode eight, my favoritepod.
Speaker 2 (47:53):
Well, it's interesting to like Instagram
effect, though, too.
I've noticed that people willjudge you a certain way based on
Instagram, and it's so annoyingCause if you didn't have that,
they wouldn't, judge you basedon that.
Speaker 1 (48:06):
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (48:07):
Only the people that met you in person could perceive
you.
So there is this weirdperception.
Speaker 1 (48:12):
It's like a fetish though.
Like people like fetish over it, Do they?
There's guys that like.
Speaker 2 (48:17):
Oh, fetish over.
It's almost like AI yeah.
Speaker 1 (48:20):
There's guys that fetish over you girls Cause
you're not getting the realperson.
Speaker 2 (48:24):
It's like those half naked girls on Instagram.
It's like what that's not even.
Speaker 3 (48:29):
Okay, let's talk about that for two seconds.
I think it's a huge red flag.
With a guy that I'm dating, Ifind I will look at who he's
following on Instagram and ifyou're following like only and
don't get me wrong, you do you.
I love a good only fans.
I do lots of industry girls,get it, girl, get it sis.
I just don't want the guy I'mdating to follow a bunch of them
.
But I think it's a big red flagIf they are following a bunch
(48:51):
of these hot model girls.
Speaker 2 (48:53):
I think it's big green flag If they have no
social media?
Absolutely, absolutely.
That's kind of unfair for me tosay, cause I do have Instagram
and there's been people I'vedated where, if they were like,
get rid of your social mediaentirely.
Because, we want to do thistogether.
Speaker 3 (49:09):
I would, oh, you would I would never Really, only
because I think it's tied toour business.
And I'm like don't stifle mybusiness.
You know what I mean.
But if you look at my following, I'm not following a bunch of
dudes, so I'm followingcreatives.
I'm following hairstylists LikeI'm following friends.
Yeah, I follow some guys, butit's not like that.
So I don't know.
I just think you and I arerostered girls.
Speaker 2 (49:31):
We're not rostered.
I'm a lover girl, that's true.
I don't know what it looks likefor the other women on there,
but there's some, I mean for me.
Speaker 1 (49:38):
I know I've dated some people that do care heavily
, Like they live and breathechecking my followers and then
so much so, where I was off foryears, like two, three years.
Speaker 3 (49:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (49:50):
Because it's just not worth the fight.
Speaker 3 (49:51):
No, it's not.
Speaker 1 (49:52):
But at the same time, I can agree with both of you
where there's boundaries thatare able to be respected and
there's things where it's likethere's certain things that are
uncalled for.
Totally, yes, like things hereand there, but if you look at it
as like there's 200 likesyou're looking at and if
everyone is an OnlyFans girl orsomeone that this guy doesn't
know you like?
Speaker 3 (50:11):
come on, have a healthy balance of like equal
men and equal women.
That's cool Because I likestuff there, of course.
Speaker 1 (50:18):
I think we talked about this the other day.
Like I will scroll and there'sstuff I like I'm like you should
probably not Not do that.
Do that Just out of respect,yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (50:28):
And it's normal to think like girls are hot, like,
yeah, it's normal to be in arelationship and think at the
other side.
It's just do you care aboutyour relationship enough to have
respect for that partner?
Absolutely.
And you just make decisionsbased on that.
Speaker 1 (50:39):
It's active.
Speaker 2 (50:39):
Well even in a friendship.
When I first met Roger, hedidn't have social media and, as
a woman looking at a man likethat, I was like I respect the
fact that this man is not, and Ifeel that because I'm the one
that pulled him.
I was like, look, you need tobe on Instagram or the podcast,
but there is somethingattractive about people who are
(51:00):
not on social media.
Speaker 1 (51:01):
Absolutely.
But it's also like we exchangemessages, like will text and
will DM, and we just always talkin various communication
platforms and sometimes she'llmessage me so like great, so
many great things on Instagramand I literally don't check for
days hours because I just Idon't think to go on there.
Speaker 3 (51:19):
I think that's a good , that's a green flag.
Speaker 1 (51:20):
I just don't, I really don't.
Speaker 3 (51:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (51:22):
I'll text her back sometimes before I reply to a DM
.
Speaker 3 (51:24):
Well, that's why, if you like need them, you're like
text them, yeah, yes, yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (51:30):
But should we do our close up?
Yeah, that's so funny Becausewe definitely want our audience
to come back.
This has been an amazingepisode.
Speaker 3 (51:39):
Thanks for having me, you guys.
Speaker 1 (51:40):
You are just radiant energy Great person.
Speaker 3 (51:43):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (51:43):
Really mesh well with us.
Speaker 2 (51:45):
Absolutely.
I feel like.
I feel like we've made alifelong friend, yes, oh my gosh
Like we're going to.
Speaker 3 (51:49):
there's no doubt in my mind that we're going to
collaborate.
Speaker 1 (51:51):
You're not a part of our network.
You're a part of our ourselves.
Speaker 3 (51:53):
Literally.
Yeah, literally will be in achat with us Like yeah, it's
bigger than anything.
Speaker 1 (51:58):
Like we are connected to you, we love it we're just a
good human.
Oh sorry, I think the worldshould know that, and hopefully
this episode does that I hope so, and we want the rest of the
audience to know to come backfor our next episode.
Speaker 3 (52:10):
In the lobby baby.
Speaker 1 (52:10):
In the lobby Because they know it's going down.
Speaker 3 (52:14):
We should do another episode at the end of this year
and see how like Austin datinghas been.
Oh, yeah, yeah and then we haveto.
Speaker 2 (52:21):
We always say this and I think this is bad.
I think I need to stop sayingthis but where can people go to
stalk you on like social media?
Yes, I'm going to get I feellike I can't say the stock thing
, but it's not Stock me actually, if you're hot, it's social
media stock.
Speaker 1 (52:34):
I think that's fair.
Speaker 3 (52:34):
So my personal Instagram is Jen Kroosha Haer
J-E-N-N-C-R-O-S-H-A-W.
It's a personal and hair photos.
I can't keep up, I can'tseparate things, so I just do
like a life in hair.
That's like my personal.
But my podcast is Gen Z podcastJ-E-N-N-Z podcast.
(52:55):
I'm a 2N, jen.
I have a theory on 2N it's onefor nice and one for naughty.
Speaker 2 (53:01):
I love that yeah.
Speaker 1 (53:03):
So what's new?
Speaker 2 (53:03):
is because we've done the collab.
People will have this episodein the lobby and then we'll have
another episode on Gen Z.
Speaker 3 (53:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (53:12):
There's a version of like listening in here listening
in there.
Speaker 3 (53:15):
Yes, it was so fun.
Speaker 1 (53:15):
Yes, and like we're going to get some good stuff.
Speaker 3 (53:18):
Yeah Well, thank you so much.
Oh my gosh, thanks for havingyou guys.
I adore you.
Speaker 1 (53:22):
This is awesome.
Speaker 3 (53:22):
This is just the beginning.
Speaker 1 (53:24):
I love it.
He just said dude, she's gorgeous, my gosh, okay,
I'm coming here, Okay, perfect,yay, thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
So Jen just got to Austin and she already has like
potential skitters.
I hope so.
I hope so Is what you're saying.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
I'm trying, I know.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
I've been sitting you up right now, thank you.
Speaker 3 (00:15):
If you didn't have a boo.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
I got a DM about you already you know, look, I'm
gonna stay, I'm gonna ride itout with my boo, but I'm telling
you Ride it out with your boo.
Speaker 3 (00:23):
I like that.
I'm gonna hook you up.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
I feel like we're like the dynamic trio.
Like you didn't know, I'm likeyou're cool.
Yeah, like you needed it, Ienjoy this a lot.
Speaker 3 (00:31):
I do too.
I know I just need datingexperience legit.
I just need to like go ondating.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
I promise you, I'm like having to respond to this
guy.
He's like going hard in thepaint right now.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Ooh, I love it.
We love a little anxious of atap.
It it's kind of nice.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Usually it's just me.
Speaker 3 (00:45):
I like the ego feed, you know, which makes you feel
good sometimes, but theinteresting thing is, everyone
is like oh, she is so fuckinghot If I give them my Instagram
and then nothing comes from it.
And I'm like I genuinely wantto date, like ask me out, like
it's where we could talk aboutthat.
I don't like, I don't get it.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
We were talking about this yesterday.
So, first of all, welcome tothe lobby.
Yay, we have Jen Kroeschaw inour lobby.
She is a fellow podcaster.
She has her own podcast, theGen Z podcast, yes, which I
literally love the name.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
It's because I'm a delusional milf and I just I
resonate, you know, as a GenZ-er but I'm a millennial.
I don't know, my birthcertificate is bullshit, but
yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
So do you feel like you're aging like Benjamin
Button or Like a hundred percent?
Okay, got it.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
But do you know what it is?
There's a couple of things, andI don't mean to be like.
I grew up kind of ugly, so itgave me a really good
personality.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
I was for sure the ugly duckling.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
It's the best place to be, because when you, yeah,
and then living moreauthentically into my purpose
and who I am has really changedmy aura and my look.
I don't look like how I was,but it's because I'm living
authentically.
Finally, I was really.
You look back at pictures andit's crazy.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
I have like two comments on that, because
there's two things that I'veexperienced that are kind of
directly connected to it.
One never got my eyebrows doneuntil I was like 27.
It was like changing I lookedback at pictures, I was like
none of you were my friendsbefore.
My eyebrows were horrid yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
Horrid.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
So that is one thing, but then the other is, honestly
, I had terrible acne in highschool and I thought it was the
worst experience when I wasyounger and I use it as like a
perspective change because itwas actually the most health.
It was like the healthiestthing for me Because I was able
to really see the people thatwere there for me to actually be
a friend.
To actually be in my life,versus people that wanted me to
(02:35):
be there to benefit their party.
To benefit a moment of likehaving the hot guys around them.
Whatever the case was Totally,and I really got to see through
people and I think it helped meto create this like internal
compass of deciding like who'shealthy for me and who's not.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Yeah, well, I think there's something really
beautiful about being a latebloomer anyway, and that's what
I love about you is because youdo have such a young energy to
you and you're so beautiful.
Yes, you look so young.
Speaker 3 (03:03):
It's young energy.
But it's the weirdest thing andI'm friends with all the really
so I'm a hairstylist in LasVegas.
I also have a podcast that Itry to do out in Austin, but at
the salon I don't resonate withthe girls that are my age.
I am that way, so I have thewisdom of like living that long.
But like I'm not.
Like I'm with the young girlsand it's just cute.
We like call each other age gapcouples, like, and I just hang
(03:25):
out with them and no one wouldeven know.
But it is a little weird whenlike the younger like I do like
younger guys, but when theyreally young ones come up and
like ooh these are your girls,but like, I like.
I know I look a certain way, butI'm not.
I'm a little too old for you.
My boy.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
No, it's tough Like you may get caught up with the
right one you know, Maybe I hope, I'm hoping.
Speaker 2 (03:44):
Well, we just watch Jen get really excited because
so we always say that we keepour podcast pretty Austin based.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
And you're like kind of like dipping your toes in
Austin.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Yeah, and Roger, you're on first.
Yeah, roger, and.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
I were laughing because we brought you into the
collective gym here to podcastwith us.
It's a lot of hot, attractivemen.
It's ridiculous and I don'teven pay attention because I'm
so used to being here, but I'mlike this is new.
This is like Jen's newplayground.
Speaker 3 (04:12):
I can't even focus, that's true.
There's I don't know what it.
Why does Austin have so manybeautiful people and so many hot
guys?
Speaker 1 (04:20):
The craziest thing is I look like y'all's bouncer,
like we walk in here you lookand do Roger.
Everyone's looking at me likewhy are you with them?
I'm like hey, hey, hey.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
No, no, no, we already took Jen.
We went to dinner with Jen andwe took her to the what's that?
Burger spot.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
I always fucking.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Not a damn chance Not a damn chance.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
I always say can I have a?
Not a goddamn chance burger.
Speaker 3 (04:38):
They get me like.
They're like what?
What Best burger of my life?
No joke.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Thank you for taking me it's really incredible.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
It was incredible.
We had a lot of this morningtoo.
I'm like I want another one.
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
It was worth the hype .
Is it Michelin Star?
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Yeah, the Michelin Star chef.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
And his friend who was a skateboarder, came
together.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
They prepped this burger for like two years.
Speaker 3 (05:00):
Stop Wow, genuinely Incredible.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
And I mean, I feel like we were all getting hit on
when we were together last night.
It's like there's so manybeautiful.
Speaker 3 (05:11):
There's just more opportunity?
I don't know.
Listen, I grew up in Vegas andelementary I was born in Seattle
, but I was raised in Vegassince I was nine.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
What when in Seattle?
Speaker 3 (05:22):
Federal Way area.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
So I actually do know Seattle pretty well.
Speaker 3 (05:25):
Really Okay.
Every time I say Federal Way,everyone's like oh.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
This hat is actually a Seattle hat.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Shut up.
Everyone's like oh.
And I was like, is it ghetto?
And apparently where I grew upwas ghetto, but I didn't know.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
Whatever Federal Way it's like meh.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
Anyways, I grew up going to like Mariners Spring
Training and like I, actually Idon't want to be a fan.
I gave big lesbian vibes for awhile Growing up.
I played softball competitivelyand I was going to play
softball in college and then Ibroke my dad's heart and I was
like listen.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
What position Pitcher oh?
Speaker 3 (05:56):
my sister was a pitcher.
Yeah they're yeah, so.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
My sister did turn out to be gay.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Really no stop it, stop it.
I'm shocked that you're sayingthat you were like a tomboy
playing sports, because you'resuch like the epitome of a girly
girl I know I look reallyfeminine.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
but yeah, no, that's my sister, though my sister's
such a girly girl, yeah, I thinkI probably went like the
complete, like I went way on theother because I wasn't.
You know, my dad played collegebaseball.
I was his oldest.
I don't think I really had theopportunity to even choose
really, because I definitelyhave the personality of like a
cheerleader and a dancer, but Ialso was I was actually really
(06:34):
good at softball.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
You came out, he probably gave you like a man and
a ball.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Absolutely yeah.
There was like no choice.
Like I was playing softball andI was good at it, but by the
time I was like Listen, I listen, bro.
Like I would like to be a girl,yeah, yeah, and I wondered why
I didn't have a boyfriend and Iwas like, oh, so then I look
back, I get it.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
Did you finish high school in Seattle?
Speaker 3 (06:55):
So I moved to Vegas when I was nine.
My dad moved for a job.
Yeah, so I was raised in Vegas.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Okay, that's like such an interesting place, I
mean total.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
People have a really weird perception of Vegas.
It's actually so interesting,so it's very like clubby party
on the strip and then outside ofit it's like crazy suburbia.
It's really hard to be singlein Las Vegas because I live, I
have two kids and I, you wouldnever know.
Yeah, I'm a mom, but I like tobe referred as Milf, milf, milf
(07:28):
and yeah, so I live in thesuburbs, which is amazing, but
it's like very family orientedYou'd be shocked Like Vegas.
It's like really like chill,low key, boring.
So Go ahead.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
I was so confused too , because we were talking about
religion, yes, and you wereinvolved, like so heavily in
your religion in Vegas.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Yes, I think we'd be shocking to some.
Yeah, some people probablyassume there is no religion in
Vegas.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
Yeah, you would think there are a ton of.
I grew up Mormon there are tonsof Mormons in Las Vegas.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
That's crazy.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
But, yeah, christianity there are tons of
religions.
I know I know people get thisperception of Las Vegas and it's
like that downtown, but it'snot.
It's super family oriented.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
I think it's the same thing as, like New York, I'm
from.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
New York.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Everyone thinks I'm from, like one particular place
that they understand New York asand it's like, yes, I may have
been born there, but no, likethere's so many other places to
be raised.
And same thing with Texas.
Like everyone thinks, there'scattle everywhere.
Now, you may run into it, butit's not on every single street
corner.
Like it's just what you mayhave set up in your mind as an
(08:34):
epitome of a certain place.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
It's just not that I know it's so weird, like the
like misconceptions, absolutely,and I think it's so weird to
have a place that you can evenhave about places, cause when I
started thinking, about Vegasand you're talking about suburbs
and you're talking about Mormonreligion.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
It's hard to put it together.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
You're like I know, I know.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
I started thinking about that show.
Sister Wives yeah, and theywere in Vegas for a while.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
They were in Vegas.
Yeah, that's good, that's good.
Yeah, that's crazy yeah.
That's my connotation with itthough.
Well, yeah, I think itoriginated with polygamy, and
then, like the mainstream Mormonchurch obviously stopped long,
long, long time ago and then,like the people in Vegas, is
there something with the laws.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
So they were persecuted in the East and so
they all went West and settledWest.
So that's why you're going tosee a lot of Utah is like the
home base, but tons in Nevada,lots in California.
They just migrated West.
Speaker 1 (09:24):
And then isn't there a lot of Hawaiians in Vegas.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
Okay, yeah, and there's a lot of more.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Hawaiians are more.
Yeah, okay.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
So they call it the.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
I'm glad you can connect this.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
Yeah, they call it the 9th Island.
I believe.
Don't quote me on it.
It's either the 7th Island orthe 9th Island.
Sure, there's tons ofPolynesians, it's awesome.
Speaker 1 (09:39):
Vegas is like their New York City.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Yeah, yes, yeah, yep, totally Wow.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
Okay, that's amazing.
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Lots of Polynesians yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
Yeah, you were married for a long time.
It still so like throws my mindthat you have like two kids.
I know you were married.
Speaker 3 (09:53):
I know I think you're lying every second, I know I
feel like I'm in like twodifferent timelines really,
which is it's just weird.
Yeah, so I got married reallyyoung.
I grew up super conservative.
How'd you all meet Church?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
Got it.
Speaker 3 (10:07):
Yeah, and we you know we were.
We followed the religion andgot married.
We saved ourselves frommarriage, which I mean it was
great for then.
I will never do that again.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
I gotta ride that boat.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
I mean it was luckily it worked out.
I do think it's insane, though,to make a lifelong commitment
without doing that For sure, butluckily it worked out for me.
But I mean, I know a lot ofpeople who it doesn't.
You know.
Yeah, I got married super young, since I was 20.
And we got divorced.
We were married for 14 yearsand yeah, I mean we're still
(10:44):
good friends.
We both left our religiontogether, so we did that before.
It's funny, because growing upin the Mormon church, they kind
of tell you like if you leave,you lose everything.
And what ended up happening iswe did leave, and what it looks
like to the outside is we didlose everything.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
I guess we got divorced.
We regained so much more.
Speaker 3 (11:04):
And I'm talking to my ex about it and he's like you
know there's a reason for thatis because when you deconstruct,
you realize like this isn't foryou anymore and things fall
apart.
What looks on the outside,things are falling apart, but
really you're living inauthenticity and shedding it.
So it's funny, like you know,we kind of proved them right-ish
, but it's been hard a couple ofyears, but I'm thriving and I
(11:30):
want people to know that, likeyou, can absolutely be happy and
live a really fulfilled lifeand not have to be a part of
that you know, everyone can livedifferent lives.
But I think there's a little bitof like internal pressure maybe
that I feel like I kind ofproved them right-ish from the
outside perspective.
(11:50):
But it's important to me to besuccessful and to be in
authenticity and to live fullyso that people can see like
that's not the case, you've beenlied to.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Right, and is your definition of success with
someone or alone?
Speaker 3 (12:07):
Right now, my current journey is to.
I want to cultivate such ahealthy relationship with myself
, because I never had that.
I mean, I went straight from myparents' house to, literally
getting married.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
That's kind of where my question comes from.
Speaker 3 (12:17):
Yeah, and so it's been really lonely, to be on my
own, Scary.
But I know that my missionright now is I need to be so
okay being alone, and I'vekicked and screamed.
It's not easy.
It's not easy.
But to be so healthy alone, Imean I want to get remarried.
I'm not even opposed to havinganother kid If I'm going to be.
I mean, the funny joke would belike all my little friends at
(12:39):
the salon are like the young 20s, Like we'll probably all get
pregnant together and I'll belike old, like 42 year old.
You know, I mean that'sprobably how it's going to
happen.
But I'm totally open to havinganother baby.
I kind of want someone whodoesn't have kids and I'd rather
give him a child.
But I really do want to getremarried and I want to have
kids.
But I don't know where we'regoing with that.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
Well, it's a defined that version of success, right?
Speaker 3 (13:01):
So success looks like to me is living just so
authentically, like if you lookback at pictures, I just I was
unhappy because I've always beenwho I am.
I'm wild, I'm a free spirit.
I have this like radiant energy.
I'm a rebel, like.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
I really do have radiant energy, thank you.
Speaker 3 (13:17):
I just I was put in a family that I just I always
thought differently and itwasn't really accepted and
that's okay.
I just you look back atpictures and I look different
and it's because I'm livingauthentically.
So success looks like yeah, Iwant to be successful in my
career, but I ultimately justwant to be happy.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Yeah and I was talking to you about this
earlier too is like you know,what did your marriage kind of
look like?
Was it more like a traditionalmarriage or was he like the
provider protector?
Yeah, like I know.
One thing I asked you is like,were you like a Pilates
housewife?
No, were you still working?
Like, what did that situationlook like?
Because you and I are alwayshaving these conversations
(13:55):
Totally Like we're out heregrinding, working.
Yep, we're going to be likeourselves to keep some times.
We're so in our masculine yes.
Speaker 3 (14:02):
Yeah, I have a lot of thoughts on that actually.
No, I've never been a housewife.
So, because I grew up soconservatively, I was raised
like women kind of stay home.
They raised the kids and I havealways felt different and I'm a
natural rebel by heart.
So I was like fuck you, you'renot going to tell me what to do.
I'm never going to stay homewith my kids.
I want to be a mom and I'mgoing to be a good mom, but you
can't tell me, because I'm awoman, that I need to stay home.
(14:24):
Right, absolutely.
I'm a little too far on theboss bitch side, okay, and I
hustled.
I've always worked.
Yeah, I'm a little tired now.
Speaker 1 (14:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
I'm a little tired now and I think my traditional
marriage always monogamous.
I'm a monogamy girl, but Iwould say that we both worked.
I've always worked.
He provided for a long time.
You know I was building my, sothis is interesting.
I went to hair school rightafter high school.
(14:55):
I worked at Caesar's Palace onthe strip this crazy hair salon
and I got anxiety and I was likeI hate hair, I hate this, and I
quit hair for like seven yearsand I went back to school for a
paralegal degree so freakingrandom.
And then one day I was like I'mtoo fun to be in a cubicle.
This is weird.
So I went back to doing hairand I just realized I do love
(15:16):
hair.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
I feel like you could make anything fun.
Yeah, it's to be fair.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
It was, but the cubicle is not my place.
I was just like meh.
But when I got back into hair Ibarely made any money and he
was like I got you, I'll provideyou know.
And then it ended up being Ibecame the breadwinner.
They have grants.
The interesting thing is theroles started becoming reversed
and I think that that ultimatelyled to kind of the demise of my
(15:42):
marriage.
There's lots of things.
Our roles were reversed and itwas a weird dynamic, I would
also say.
When we got married, we kind oftrauma bonded.
We were so young I neededsomeone to save me.
I didn't really have emotionalsafety when I grew up.
Obviously they're a greatfamily, they provide it for me
financially, but I've alwaysbeen different.
(16:03):
I did not have emotional safetyand so I desperately needed
someone to save me and he camein.
We both had trauma, we bonded,he saved me and then eventually
I realized I don't want to besaved anymore and I don't think
he wanted to save.
We both kind of got to thispoint where we were like holy
shit, we were so young.
(16:23):
Now we're both healing, butwe're healing on different
trajectories, and I just waslike I don't wanna be saved
anymore.
But it's extremelyuncomfortable because I leaned
on him so much to you know.
I went from my parents to himand then, once I started healing
and some of the childhood stuff, I was like I need to do things
(16:44):
on my own and we both just satdown.
It was a very healthy likenobody did anything bad.
We sat down and we had somereally hard conversations.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
You sound healthy now , even on the back end.
Speaker 3 (16:52):
Yeah, we're really good friends.
It just was that we sat downand we had really hard
conversations and when we wereboth starting to heal, we
realized one we trauma bondedand we were little.
We're not the same people thatwe were.
How can we make this work?
And ultimately we decided Ithink we need to let ourselves
go to grow and I didn't thinkthat we both thought that we
couldn't achieve the growth thatwe needed together.
(17:14):
For me, I needed to be aloneand I needed to be my own savior
and my own safety and not relyon anybody.
And for him, he didn't need tobe saving someone, he needs to
save himself.
It was really painful to justhave that realization, like
nobody did anything bad.
It just was at that point wherewe were like we've grown apart,
we were babies.
(17:34):
We're healed.
Now we're on our path tohealing.
I think we need to letourselves go and we kind of
stepped away and we said let'sdo the work and grow and if we
get back together, cool.
But honestly, I don't see itlike that at all.
I think our energies are justso different.
We're really good friends, butit's never gonna go that way
again.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
I think I came into this episode wanting to ask you
so many questions about why themarriage ends, and was there
fighting happening likeinfidelity?
But just the way that you talkabout your ex cause we say this
all the time the way that youtalk about your ex says a lot
about you as a person.
Speaker 3 (18:09):
It's really important for me.
I mean, there have been timeswhere I've been extremely
frustrated with him post-divorceFinancially, like I am on my
own.
So, I think I don't want peopleto get it twisted Like I'm
doing everything, like you know,like on my own.
Yeah, but he's extremelysupportive.
Yeah, nobody did anything wrongand I think people wanted that
juice and I'm like, honestly, weleft our religion and we went
(18:32):
into deep therapy to deconstructand we realized we did a lot of
things for other people and weneed to grow and I don't know
how to achieve the growth thatwe both individually need
together.
I mean, my growth was I wasdepending on him too much.
I needed to be on my own savior.
I needed to be uncomfortablealone.
I need to be alone and be okaywith that.
(18:53):
This is probably private, butthrough our marriage, a lot of
times he would say you need memore than you want me.
And I thought a lot about thatand I was like, unfortunately,
because I was so emotionallydamaged when I was younger, my
needs were greater than my wantsand I needed to someone to save
me and I loved him and I wantedhim, but my needs were greater
(19:15):
than my wants and I neededsomeone to save me.
So I'm really trying to work onbeing my own savior and being
my own.
And it's hard, like it's reallyuncomfortable.
For the first time in my life,I have to heal, like I have to
self soothe.
I can't rely on my family.
I can't rely on this guy that Iwas with forever to save me.
It's me.
Speaker 1 (19:34):
I think that you bring up a valuable lesson as
well.
It's like you're betting onyourself, and I think when you
bet on yourself, it'suncomfortable.
It's so painful Like there'sprobably some minutes, hours and
days and weeks, months.
Speaker 3 (19:47):
Who knows how long the time for it needs to be or
what it is where you really justhave to motivate yourself to
put one foot in front of theother and I look back and I'm
like I'm so proud of myselfbecause I'm coming to Austin
once a month.
I could never have done that.
I started going on solo tripswhen we were starting to
separate.
I have never done any travelingalone, sleeping alone.
I couldn't do it.
I would have to call him.
I would get anxiety at night andsleep.
(20:09):
And here I am every month, likecoming to Austin alone, and I'm
like it's hard to see yourprogress because it's still
uncomfortable, but I'm like,damn, you're doing it OK.
Speaker 2 (20:18):
Yeah, and that's like I feel like I could be wrong,
but it seems like part of yourhealing process is like
podcasting too.
You're really doing that foryourself.
So is that kind of whatmotivated you to get into
podcasting?
Speaker 3 (20:30):
Yeah, Originally, my personality has just always been
so big Like I feel like there'ssomething bigger, like I need
it to be out there to talk topeople I do hair.
Speaker 1 (20:39):
We have two guests here because your personality is
so big.
Speaker 3 (20:42):
No, and I do hair and it's really fun and I interact
with my guests.
And then I started making likegoofy reels on my Instagram and
that brought me joy.
But originally I started thepodcast as like a creative
outlet I wanted to talk about, Imean, going through divorce.
People are so shitty, likepeople are so stupid, and
actually I'm like such a loving,fun, kind person and I even a
(21:03):
little.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
You're going through a breakup, people are shitty, so
a divorce Like I can onlyimagine.
Speaker 3 (21:06):
I hate people.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
And I hate saying that, because it's like Because
then again you still love people.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
Yeah, I guess.
No, yeah, I just.
I started it as a way to be,like you know, like it's a
cathartic healing experience,and I wanted to talk about like
getting divorced and people and,like you know, stop giving
unsolicited advice.
And then, you know, in thedating world and then I want to
kind of niche down more intodating but, like life and funny,
I don't know where it'll evolve, but I'm really excited and I
(21:33):
want it to just keep going andI'm just kind of giving myself
grace to like let it evolvenaturally and just Well, I get.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
yeah, I'll kind of pay you back on your question to
where I feel as if your podcastand like asking more about it
you're one of those podcastswhere I listen to it and yours
is like a journey.
Speaker 3 (21:49):
Yeah, it is Hearing it in a higher journey.
It's going to be veryinteresting to where it ends.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
I wish the niche was.
The answer was journey.
Right, like if you could putlike what type of podcast it was
.
It was like journey.
Speaker 3 (22:01):
Yeah, because people are like what type of podcast?
I'm like, you know, we talkabout healing, we have a little
comedy, we have a little popculture, we have dating, we have
divorce, like I don't know,it's a lot, it's just life.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
You know what I think it is, though it's you there
you go.
That's what it is, it'sauthentically you and that's
what people are going toresonate with.
You know, and I think that'swhat's so cool about it and,
like your experience, is so goodfor people to hear, because,
getting married so young, I'msure you weren't even on dating
apps ever, oh never.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
The divorce?
Never, yeah, no, I barely hadany dating experience.
I think I had like one littleboyfriend in high school and it
barely was anything.
So that's terrifying.
Dating apps are wild.
Like I don't even like yeah.
So I mean, I've been divorcedfor two years.
I've been trying.
I'm like I go like we talkedabout it yesterday, like I go
like ebb and flow.
Right now I'm off of them, Idon't want anything to do with
(22:50):
them, I'm exhausted.
I'm just like catch me in thewild, catch me in the wild, boys
, please.
That's so funny, you heard ithere first.
Catch me in the wild.
Speaker 2 (23:00):
They're already trying to.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
I'm receiving DMs as we are, literally.
He got one DM guys, buthonestly I'm open.
He's on it right now.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
I'm open to all the DMs.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
Send it to Rod, she's single, so I am single, yes.
Speaker 1 (23:13):
And it's different too, because usually Cass is
like, hey, for anyone that'ssingle, I'm here.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
Holler, hello, Ratchett girl yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
That is funny.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
Well, have you been in a relationship with anyone
since your divorce?
I?
Speaker 3 (23:29):
dated, so I call it the bad pancake theory.
I always say this have you guysheard about that?
Speaker 1 (23:33):
No, I feel like I know where you're going, but no.
Speaker 3 (23:35):
So I feel like after a long-term relationship, the
first on my mind is love.
So in a batch of pancakes, thefirst one is shit, it's like.
It's literally like burned andwhatever.
And then the rest get likegolden and fluffy.
So I feel like you gotta haveyour bad pancake.
I did try to date a guy.
I haven't had anyone that Iwould say is my boyfriend.
I dated two guys, maybeconsistently one for two months,
(23:56):
one for a month.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
No, Look at you.
Speaker 3 (23:59):
Yeah, I wish Roger.
No, that would be awesome.
We also talked about I don'thave a roster.
I like I just am not that girl.
I would rather just pour myenergy into one person and then,
when it's done, it's done, moveon.
I've dated, I've gone on lotsof first dates, but they really
haven't gone anywhere.
I dated two guys like a littlebit more consistently, but only
for like a month or two, like init.
(24:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:21):
I guess it's you bring up, or we brought it up in
our conversation with you thedifference of masculine and
feminine energy.
Do you feel as if men right noware too fragile to deal with
versions of maybe you havingkids or having an ex-husband?
Yeah, it's interesting Likedoes that get in the way of your
dating experience?
Speaker 3 (24:41):
I think it does.
I had one guy that was likekind of flirt with me over DMs
and he I can kind of sniff out,I think, because I'm a mom and I
do like younger guys.
I do like them, but I'm alsoopen if you're like hot and have
young energy and you're older.
But I like younger guys becauseI naturally have younger energy
.
I don't resonate with being 38.
(25:01):
And this one guy was liketrying to flirt with me.
I also think there's like a milkfantasy which is like kind of
fun on the ego, but at the sametime I'm like, listen, like at
this point in my life I want todate, like intentionally date.
But yeah, he was like in my DMs, like hitting me up and I'm
like if you want to take me on adate, then great, but like this
(25:23):
, whatever, and he goes well.
I just I have some reservations.
I'm like cool, hit me with them.
He's like I've never datedanyone with kids and I'm like
that's fact and that's valid.
I actually personally don'twant to date someone with kids.
I don't want to blend families.
I would rather marry someonewho doesn't have a baby and give
him a baby, like that's justlike yeah, but I was really
(25:43):
worried when I got yeah, I wasreally worried when I got
divorced because I was kind oflike a little bitter.
I'm like damn, like I'm this ageand like no one's going to want
to date me with two kids and Ialso yeah, it's a lot, I don't
know.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
I said that's a lie.
Oh, that's right.
Speaker 3 (25:57):
Yeah, I thought it was like I don't know it could
have.
It could impact my dating.
I honestly like things aren'treally going anywhere.
So, yeah, but I don't know.
My kids have a great dad.
No one's trying, I'm not tryingto be stepdaddy.
I also am used to working, so Idon't need anyone to come and
save me.
So I'm just like look like Idon't know.
(26:18):
It's tricky.
Yeah, it probably does impactdating.
I just don't really know aboutit.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Well, we were talking about this the other day.
It's like there's so manydifferent timelines on women and
I like that.
It looks like because you knowI'm 29,.
We talked about this Likepeople could be looking at me
like why is she single?
Why is she single?
Yeah, and then someone couldcontradict you oh, she has kids.
It's like who the right person?
Speaker 3 (26:41):
for us.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Totally Doesn't care.
Speaker 3 (26:43):
Yeah, and if you get to know me, like yeah, and then
we just address, I'm just likethere's no pressure, like let's
just see if we vibe, and then wecan have kind of those
conversations.
Also, my kids are so freakingcool and easy Like they're not
like in diapers, you knowthey're, and they're just so
sweet Like they're good.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
And are they?
I think that's something, toothat comes up, Cause I had a
friend of mine that I grew upwith who his parents were
divorced but very comfortabletogether.
Like literally friends, and somuch so that his dad was the
coach of our basketball team.
My dad was the coach and hisstepdad was the coach.
Speaker 3 (27:15):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
So like they were all the coach in the same team.
Speaker 3 (27:17):
That's so cool.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
And all the kids on the team were like this is weird
for you.
Huh yeah, it just wasn't.
It really wasn't.
Speaker 3 (27:24):
I think that just requires an emotional maturity
that I would.
I would love that.
For sure I'm also aware, likeobviously that's weird, but I
would love it?
Speaker 1 (27:31):
Are your kids comfortable with you dating?
Speaker 3 (27:34):
I make jokes about it to try to ease it up.
I haven't really.
I introduced one, the guy Idated for a couple months, but
as a friend and I don't know, Ithink they're more open to it.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Were they sniffing?
Speaker 3 (27:47):
it out.
No, she bought it.
Yeah, you know she was like ohcool, like you have a friend,
they're very open to like.
They just don't really wantlike another dad.
They're just like oh, it's likea bonus friend.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (27:58):
Like yeah, but I don't know.
I think we've done a reallygood job of like we really
haven't gone, like no one'sreally moved on, like it's crazy
.
You know, fast, we both havereally tried to do healing, so
they haven't really met anyone.
I think they're open to it.
I make jokes all the time.
I even make jokes about datingaliens at this point, honestly,
when they confirmed like thealiens, I was like ooh, daddy's
(28:19):
home, like dating pool they'reprobably hot honestly, If
they're over six feet and healed.
hit me up, they probably are hotAlien or not?
Honestly, maybe we should do itfor the plot, so what?
So I kept saying like she sawlike a UFO in the sky and I was
like, oh, daddy's home andthat's like big.
And she's like stop, mom, I'mlike A normal thing out there in
Nevada.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
Is that fair?
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Oh, all the time.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
Like alien talk.
Speaker 3 (28:41):
Yeah, Like area 51.
Anyways, I was like oh, that'syour step daddy baby.
She didn't like that, shedidn't think that was funny, you
both guys' daddy.
Oh, I love it Absolutely.
I love calling a guy daddy.
I will gladly that's like thatsubmission energy, I think so
we've talked about this becauseme and you are in our masculine
and, like I have a freakingcareer and all that I want to
(29:01):
submit to a man.
I just haven't met a man thatlike I'm worthy, yeah, and also
that doesn't get intimidated bymy success, like it's.
I'm not trying to emasculateyou, it's just like you know, I
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
Do you feel like?
Do you feel like men's Egos area little bit more fragile than
women's?
Speaker 3 (29:20):
I don't know.
Okay, I don't know.
Yeah, I don't know what youguys think.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
I feel I feel like they are.
I feel like I've had a hardtime Dating, that I feel like
I've seen men be a little bitmore fragile with their ego.
In my experience, or it's likethey're needing their ego fed
and I haven't even met them inperson.
Yeah so I'm like how am I gonnatell you You're so great,
you're so hot?
And like, yeah, I miss you.
Yeah, I can't wait to see you.
(29:46):
I'm like you haven't even madethe effort to meet up with me in
person.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
I have found I think I'm gonna start so the most
successful recent Interactionswith men and the relationship
they have not seen my Instagram.
Yeah and I'm at the point whereI went.
So it's like on the dating apps, I'm off of them.
But when I was on the datingapps they'd be like what's your
Instagram?
I give it to them and theninstantly like nothing happens.
And I thought a lot about thatand I I don't know if I and like
(30:11):
I have no idea, but once guyssee my Instagram, it's like they
don't ask me out and my friendslike, oh, you're there,
intimidated, and I'm like, ifyou got to know me, I am not
intimidating them the slightest.
I'm down to earth, like I don'tget it and I'm also kind of
goofy on my Instagram.
So I don't know if like mypersonality is too much for them
or they just see that like oh,she's like happy and independent
, like is that fragile to theirego?
(30:32):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
I think if they don't have the right intentions by
you and this is me as a guy-yeah they don't have the right
intentions by you and you have apodcast.
They're like, holy shit, she'sgonna out me on the podcast.
Speaker 3 (30:45):
Yeah, and I did do a couple episodes.
Yeah, and I did do it.
It was fucking awesome.
That could be scary, yeah, somepeople and I'm trying not, I'm
not trying to be the TaylorSwift of freakin you know
podcast and try to like blastguys.
But um, I did talk about onetime my first interaction with a
man Divorce.
He had a broken penis.
(31:05):
Well, that's I mean there is no.
I know, I know even my sluttyfriends were like they haven't
had the pleasure I have.
What does that mean?
Speaker 1 (31:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (31:14):
I flew to New York to meet this guy I met one time in
Las Vegas and I like I don'tknow what I was thinking anyways
.
Speaker 1 (31:21):
But like why wouldn't he tell you in advance?
He?
Speaker 3 (31:23):
told me the day after it just it was freaking weird.
I was so uncomfortable, it wasjust weird and something was not
right and I was like what thehell?
And then the next day he's likeah, babe, babe, did you know
that I have?
I broke my dick and like withhis British accent I was like
what, what?
I can't believe.
I've even talking about this onthe phone.
I did an episode about it.
But I was like what?
And he's like, oh yeah, oh yeah, he goes.
(31:44):
I went to be that, I went to bethe with the boys and he's like
I was doing so many drugs andLike I couldn't get it up.
So then I took a Viagra andthen I had sex with this girl
for five hours and then broke mydick and I was like what?
And like let me just give youthis picture Jen Kroosha.
Like I, like I grew up Mormon.
I'm like why am I with this guy?
Yeah, like I don't.
I don't even drink, you know.
So I'm just like what?
(32:05):
Is this the first guypost-aboard?
Uh-huh, yeah that's and there'sno other reason why that had to
happen.
Speaker 1 (32:10):
I wish you would have seen my eyes.
Speaker 3 (32:11):
I'm listening, I'm like there's no other reason it
had to be in for the plot or thepodcast, like there's no other
reason why that would happen.
I'm like what?
Speaker 1 (32:20):
there's a level of divine timing that's like you
think the grass is greener,sometimes not really not like my
one of my Relationships.
Speaker 2 (32:29):
as soon as I got out of it, the first guy hooked up
with he was so well endowed andI was like wow, like yeah, I've
been missing out, like notrealizing not everyone is like
that, yeah, I just got luckywith the first one.
Speaker 3 (32:41):
You know, I do want to say something I I don't want
people to think like oh, I gotdivorced, yeah, grass is greener
.
I never, ever ever was doingthat and so that I could, the
grass is greener.
I don't think the grass isgreener.
I think the grass is greenwhere you freaking water it.
Speaker 1 (32:55):
That's what I'm saying.
It's like you don't seem thatway.
No, I think your point is yes.
Speaker 3 (32:59):
Yeah, absolutely it's valid.
But yeah, I didn't get divorcedbecause, like, I wanted to like
go party and like have fun andlike whatever experience that.
But yeah, the grass is not.
The grass is green where youwater it.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
Maybe not the broken dick.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
I was trash garbage.
Yeah minute I left I was likeblock I don't even know like
that was and I was like you knowwhat?
That's cool.
That's the plot it had to havebeen.
I don't know, that was crazy.
Speaker 2 (33:26):
You can throw some water on it, but I don't think
it's gonna fix it.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
I'm like another Viagra.
Speaker 3 (33:30):
Oh, I know, I just being him where I was like we're
gonna be cool friends thisweekend, like we're not.
And I wasn't in my villain eralike from like hug to like I was
like like you, dapp them up,yeah.
I wasn't not in my villain era.
I was so nice like this.
If that happened now, I'd belike pounce and bro, I'm doing a
solo trip in New York.
We had like two days left.
So I was like, and luckily wehad separate hotels, thank
goodness.
I was like alright, um, so gohome, I'll see you in the
(33:53):
morning, because we have likesome tourist things to hit like.
I was still like, I was so nice, yeah, and I hung out with him
the whole weekend like asfriends, because I was like this
is freaking weird.
Yeah, we like didn't vibe atall, it was just.
It was like I like.
Speaker 2 (34:05):
I like I've said villain era, though, because
sure, sometimes I'm like, yeah,I'm in my villain.
Good, yeah, am I really in myvillain era?
No, or am I just havingboundaries?
Speaker 3 (34:14):
It's bad one not in your villain era.
It's just, you have boundaries.
Yeah, I just was so nice, I waslike, oh, that was
uncomfortable.
Okay, we're gonnacompartmentalize that and we're
gonna.
We have that.
You know, we have all thesethings that we need to hit ice
if you need.
Speaker 2 (34:27):
It's nice that, like you, had your own hotel room.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
Thank, goodness, thank goodness, I yeah that's if
you're ever gonna travel forlike a person you need your
space, like I don't know.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
If things get weird, you just don't know what you're
walking in on.
Speaker 3 (34:38):
Yeah, and that was just a dumb judgment call, like
on me.
I think I was just like, oh,that would be fun, no, at the
same time.
Speaker 1 (34:45):
It's like I know people that have met out with
other people in another city.
Speaker 3 (34:48):
Yeah, like state and they stay with that.
Speaker 2 (34:50):
Yeah, no, no I think you made the right move someone
gentlemanly, if they can affordto and they should they should
they absolutely you want me tocome, which I'm also down.
Speaker 3 (35:00):
I like to come hang out, but I love to travel.
But, yeah, no, I, I have tohave my own yeah, that's like a
mutual respect kind of yeah.
Speaker 1 (35:09):
Yeah that's like one of those learning moments for me
where I'm like, if I ever am inthat scenario, you have to, I
would offer that.
Speaker 3 (35:15):
Yeah, I need to, yeah and it's just weird, like
cohabiting, like you got a poop,see at some point, like you
know it's too close.
It's too close, just like.
Give me my own space, yeah, areyou.
Speaker 2 (35:25):
I'm weird about like personal space.
I don't know if you are, butlike there's a guy I've been
dating.
He took me on two dates okayand he's like trying to come
over tonight and like hang out,Like he's like I want to do
something chill.
Speaker 3 (35:36):
Oh yeah, Well we know what that means.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
Me like, literally, I feel like someone coming into
my space is the same as themcoming inside me, because it's
so like my Person.
Yeah bubble for you.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
I would rather have them at my house, though, than
going away.
It's cuz this makes me morecomfortable.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
Yeah, okay, more safe , yeah, yeah and then I guess
it's so funny you both bringthis up right, like you talk
about what makes you feel safe.
You talk about kind of likeyou're limited or you're just
boundaries in general.
Do you think you choose yourpartners the same way that you
did before you were married, orI differently after divorce.
Speaker 3 (36:16):
I feel like I I'm very self-aware.
I've done a lot of healing intheir work.
There's still some childhoodstuff that I'm trying to work
through.
Yeah, I have noticed that I'mattracting emotionally
unavailable people, and thatbrings me to pause and wonder if
I'm actually emotionallyunavailable or it's the universe
being like you still haven'tyou sell some childhood wounds.
(36:37):
You are not going to get peoplethat are I.
Sometimes I'm like damn.
I'm being like divinelyprotected, because things are
just not working out for sure,and I'm like, okay, yeah, yeah,
I'm a track I'm not attracting.
I'm aware I don't want that.
I can see it in partners andI'm like I'm not repeating
cycles, I'm not gonna do that.
Yeah, there's.
You know, I've come way too farto like settle or to be in the
(36:59):
same situation.
I'm not gonna do that.
Yeah, but I am attracting weirdon it emotionally unavailable
guys I.
So if you're emotionallyunavailable and you have Don't
DM her.
No yummy, All heal real fast.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
Did they say that, like who you're dating sometimes
is like a reflection of how yousee yourself For sure.
So I mean I've had the samesituation happen where I'm like
am I loving ourselves?
I don't think so, because ifyou look at you and I, I feel
like we're both women who dopour into ourselves.
All the time, so I don't thinkit's that we're not emotionally
available.
Speaker 3 (37:32):
I'm aware I have childhood wounds of wanting to
be chosen.
Okay, and so I.
Dear brothers and sisters, yes,yeah, but it's very interesting
.
They don't have the sameexperience growing up as I do.
I think I just was differentand so you know.
Speaker 1 (37:46):
And you were the oldest.
Speaker 3 (37:47):
And yeah, and now, as a parent, I realize you don't
have a blueprint or manual, no,so but you were the lesson child
.
Yeah, yeah.
So I want to be chosen and Ifind that or I like want to be
like fought for almost, and Irealize where that's coming from
.
It's more of like an anxiousattachment style because it's
like a childhood wound.
So I'm trying to be more secure.
Speaker 2 (38:07):
I feel like that's kind of feminine, though it is.
Speaker 3 (38:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
Yeah, it is yeah.
It is Because we don't want tobe the pursuers, like we want a
man to choose us you want to becourted.
Speaker 3 (38:16):
Exactly I want to be courted.
But I do realize that, like,relationships are a mirror.
So I'm like okay, you reallywant a guy to choose you.
You're not choosing yourself.
So how does that look like?
How can I turn inward andchoose myself?
Speaker 1 (38:27):
Yeah, and I think that's, and still meet somebody.
Speaker 3 (38:30):
Yeah, like right now, it's like I'm still just trying
to work on.
Like you know, I choose you,jen, I choose you.
I'm trying to repeat to myselflike I choose you, like you're
freaking awesome, like you know,things like that, but I think
they're a mirror, like so.
Speaker 1 (38:43):
I remember when I was a kid I would always like I was
oddly like introspective and Iwould look at things just very
differently.
Speaker 3 (38:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
And I would always look and like have you either of
you seen those couples thatwalk around and you're like,
okay, one person is blatantlyattractive and the other person
is blatantly not attractive.
Speaker 3 (39:01):
I know I never want to be in a couple like that.
I want to be like I want themto be, like damn, and then
sometimes.
Speaker 2 (39:06):
Barbie and Ken.
Speaker 3 (39:06):
Yeah, yeah, how are couple lives.
Speaker 1 (39:09):
I'm like is that person either that confident in
themselves or is the otherperson that?
Do they lack confidence inthemselves that much that they
have?
Speaker 3 (39:19):
to.
I think it's an energy, it'sphysical.
I think it's an energy thing.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
I hear you, I hear you.
That's kind of why, where Iasked the question, I'm asking
Well, it's almost like prettyprivilege, does it connect?
Speaker 2 (39:28):
To right, we don't choose these human flesh cells
right.
So it's like if you'reattracted to someone's energy,
like even Jen's energy is sobeautiful, like you can just
feel it.
Thank you, it's radiant.
Speaker 3 (39:42):
I had the last guy I dated.
I learned a lot from him.
He was more in his masculine.
He our culturally were sodifferent it would have never
worked out, but I reallyappreciated that he was in his
masculine.
And one thing that he wouldcompliment me on and, like you
know, like we would have sexystuff but like he would never
compliment me over text on mybody.
(40:02):
He would always be like I missyour energy and that to me is
like a top tier compliment.
I want that, like I love that.
I'm like, oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
That's awesome.
Speaker 3 (40:11):
But I think it's an energy thing and yeah, I mean,
or I don't know.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
It is fascinating, though, like if you'll see, like
someone like that's soattractive, with someone that's
kind of like average, and you'relike how did you get?
Speaker 1 (40:23):
them.
But it's like everyone hasdifferent kind of thing, like I
could never be with someone I'mnot physically attracted to but
maybe someone could like I don'tknow Like yeah, it's like
something to ponder on Cause,like, when I look at it even
from childhood to being an adult, I'm just sometimes I'm like
that's too much to think about.
I don't want to look that wayanymore.
Speaker 2 (40:44):
It depends on what you're looking for, like if I
just wanted a husband.
I could go get a husband.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
And.
Speaker 2 (40:49):
I wanted a soul mate With that.
Sexual compatibility isdifferent, right?
Speaker 3 (40:54):
I also think like it's.
I try to give grace because,like for me as a mom, like I'm a
little bit insecure about likejust my body will never be
unless I have surgery to fix it,which I have had, like my boobs
fixed, which is great, but likemy stomach, it's always a
little bit and I'm waiting, I'mholding out because I don't want
to have that and like I want tosee how my life plays out and
(41:15):
if I get the opportunity to havea baby again, I'll do that and
then get it fixed.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
Oh wow, that's smart.
Speaker 3 (41:20):
Yeah, but.
Speaker 1 (41:21):
I'm sure that could have complications.
Speaker 3 (41:23):
Yeah, I think it just get crazy and so, but it is
like I do get insecure because,you know, look like I am
ultimately a mom.
I work so freaking hard, like Ialways say, like moms or milfs
can never stay complacent,because then they just become
moms, yeah, which is fine, butI'm trying to work out my body,
but no matter what, like I'vehad babies, so my skin's always
gonna be a little bit like youknow, on my stomach, which is
(41:46):
fine.
But yeah, I'm always like okay,I would hope that you would
give me grace.
Like I work as hard as I can onmy body.
For the same time, like I havehad babies, I'm not gonna be
like a hot 24 year old model,you know, sure.
Speaker 2 (41:59):
Do you feel like a cause?
I feel this personally like acompetitiveness, almost as I
started to age into my likelater twenties.
A little bit I'm like oh shit,Like I can't keep up with these,
like 22 year olds anymore, andit's like a little.
It's kind of a mind fuck it is.
Watching yourself age as awoman and then still be trying
to date and find your person.
Speaker 1 (42:20):
As a male too.
It's like it's real.
Speaker 2 (42:22):
Roger, you're so pretty, I'm like yeah.
Speaker 3 (42:23):
Roger it's so rude.
How do you wake up in themorning Like it's kind of rude?
She knows.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
I'm very ritualistic and routine.
But it's like a lot of thingsyou're both bringing up where
it's like that competitivespirit.
I have that.
Speaker 3 (42:34):
Like.
Speaker 1 (42:35):
I'm very competitive.
And then also the things I knowI'm not gonna have that same
lusty look that I did when I wasyounger but, there's certain
qualities and things that I canreally focus on and put my
energy into where I'm like I cando something about it yeah.
Speaker 3 (42:51):
I was gonna say I am a big fan of doing anything
cosmetic that you want to.
I try to keep it really natural, cause I think whenever you
pour your into yourself, likethe universe rewards you Like
yeah, like if you want it.
I'm a huge fan of Botox.
I think it's amazing.
However, I will say I have anenergy healer in Vegas and she's
like you know, you can talkback to that voice in your head,
right, and I was like what?
Speaker 2 (43:13):
Don't fuck me up.
Speaker 3 (43:14):
So now, when I'm like , oh, I'm like this, I'm like
shut the fuck up, like I'll justbe, like what do you mean?
And I'm like stop it, because Ithink like if you really go
down that rabbit hole of likefeeling that like competitive
cause we're gonna age, it's sogood.
It's like yeah, stop it.
And I've been trying to catchmyself like now.
No, because I think if you havethe energy of like deep self
love, you're like, I'm confidentin who I am and what I have to
(43:35):
offer.
Like, yeah, like the youngerones, but they don't have the
wisdom of like and the emotionalintelligence you know.
So it's like you do offer agingis good.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
There's something.
There's something Get someBotox About being a woman and
not being a girl.
Speaker 3 (43:50):
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (43:51):
And like loving yourself a little bit more each
year that comes with it.
Speaker 3 (43:55):
And I think also it's hard embracing like woman's
body compared to being a girl'sbody.
So you see these really hotyoung girls but you're like, oh
man, like you haven't kind oftransitioned into that woman
body and that's a level of selflove and acceptance that you
need.
Speaker 1 (44:09):
But it shows up in other places in your life too.
Speaker 2 (44:12):
Yeah, that woman body is almost hotter though.
Speaker 3 (44:14):
I would hope.
So I mean like look, I got somecurves, like yeah.
Speaker 1 (44:18):
It's, I think, as a guy to offer the answer.
I think there's a version tothe answer where it's like it's
sadistic, If you really do loveand like, focus your energy on
that younger looking body andimage Versus like hey, sometimes
things happen.
Where like you meet somebody,it is what it is.
Speaker 3 (44:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (44:37):
Age gaps happen, right.
But then there's a version of,yes, what you just said with
self love and what you talkabout with the version of
competition and just reallyworking on yourself.
When you see a mature woman inher power, that is, I mean,
that's a thing of like radiantenergy that you walk away and
you don't forget.
So it's like you have aninteraction with that person and
(45:00):
even if you don't interact withthat person, you just you get a
smell of their perfume,whatever it is, and when you
come across that person, youdon't forget.
So a woman in her powers is awoman.
That is like you control thegame.
Speaker 3 (45:15):
The game doesn't control you.
But I will say, as a woman,like we've been conditioned to
hate ourselves, like by society.
So no matter, even if we're inour power, we have to fight
those voices, because it'salways gonna come up.
Speaker 1 (45:26):
The talking back is huge, like I think, that.
Speaker 3 (45:27):
Yeah, she finally was like you know, you can actually
talk back to that voice, right?
And if you have to be soaggressive and be like shut the
fuck up, you stupid bitch, likeI don't care what it is, but
like it immediately is like oh,okay, yeah yeah, that's what's
hard, too, about like beingsingle and really sitting with
yourself in your own thoughts.
Speaker 2 (45:46):
You start being like self aware of some of the
negative shit that like comes uptoo.
Speaker 3 (45:51):
Yeah, but like as a again as a woman, like we've
been conditioned to hateourselves.
You know, I'm in the beautyindustry too.
It's like that.
You know which is?
Speaker 1 (45:58):
tough, yeah, it is yeah, so.
It's almost like how many timesa day does somebody say hey,
look at this picture, I wannalook like this?
Speaker 3 (46:05):
Yeah, and I'm like what do you love about it?
Because that girl is a sizezero and she's six feet tall and
all that space A model yeah,I'm like I can give you
extensions, like what you know.
I know it's a little twisted.
Speaker 2 (46:17):
Yeah, I mean, I think there was one thing I wanted to
ask you.
Yeah, if there's anything youcould tell your younger self,
like when you were in your 20s,like what would it be?
Speaker 3 (46:29):
Even in my 20s, I feel like my you are enough.
You are enough.
I think that's always been thetheme like you are enough.
And just because you aredifferent than your tribe does
not make you crazy or not goodenough.
You were planted to shakethings up and sometimes that's
(46:51):
an isolating journey and that'sokay.
But you're gonna make it andit's gonna be okay.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
Love that, love that, and then I guess I'll follow up
with that on a question we liketo ask all our guests like
what's the biggest misconceptionabout you that you would love
to offer clarity towards.
Speaker 3 (47:05):
I look a certain way, but I am not that way.
I think you would look at meand think like I'm just, I'm
extremely down to earth and Ithink it's because I grew up
ugly.
I don't know, no, I just mypersonality is like a lot more
like down to earth.
I'm very warm Maybe you can seethat from my social media, but
it's funny.
Like I just would have peoplelike oh, they think I'm a
(47:27):
certain way, or like I'm like a,like a rich housewife I'm like
what.
Like no, I'm just like no, notat all.
Speaker 1 (47:33):
Yeah, so I think maybe my looks I'm, I don't know
, maybe no, I mean, and that'sit's a moment to all like, this
is your stage, so it's a momentwhere you get to reflect back
and somebody ever asks you thequestion in the future.
You're like, hey, I was on inthe lobby and they'll listen in
on episode eight, my favoritepod.
Speaker 2 (47:53):
Well, it's interesting to like Instagram
effect, though, too.
I've noticed that people willjudge you a certain way based on
Instagram, and it's so annoyingCause if you didn't have that,
they wouldn't, judge you basedon that.
Speaker 1 (48:06):
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (48:07):
Only the people that met you in person could perceive
you.
So there is this weirdperception.
Speaker 1 (48:12):
It's like a fetish though.
Like people like fetish over it, Do they?
There's guys that like.
Speaker 2 (48:17):
Oh, fetish over.
It's almost like AI yeah.
Speaker 1 (48:20):
There's guys that fetish over you girls Cause
you're not getting the realperson.
Speaker 2 (48:24):
It's like those half naked girls on Instagram.
It's like what that's not even.
Speaker 3 (48:29):
Okay, let's talk about that for two seconds.
I think it's a huge red flag.
With a guy that I'm dating, Ifind I will look at who he's
following on Instagram and ifyou're following like only and
don't get me wrong, you do you.
I love a good only fans.
I do lots of industry girls,get it, girl, get it sis.
I just don't want the guy I'mdating to follow a bunch of them
.
But I think it's a big red flagIf they are following a bunch
(48:51):
of these hot model girls.
Speaker 2 (48:53):
I think it's big green flag If they have no
social media?
Absolutely, absolutely.
That's kind of unfair for me tosay, cause I do have Instagram
and there's been people I'vedated where, if they were like,
get rid of your social mediaentirely.
Because, we want to do thistogether.
Speaker 3 (49:09):
I would, oh, you would I would never Really, only
because I think it's tied toour business.
And I'm like don't stifle mybusiness.
You know what I mean.
But if you look at my following, I'm not following a bunch of
dudes, so I'm followingcreatives.
I'm following hairstylists LikeI'm following friends.
Yeah, I follow some guys, butit's not like that.
So I don't know.
I just think you and I arerostered girls.
Speaker 2 (49:31):
We're not rostered.
I'm a lover girl, that's true.
I don't know what it looks likefor the other women on there,
but there's some, I mean for me.
Speaker 1 (49:38):
I know I've dated some people that do care heavily
, Like they live and breathechecking my followers and then
so much so, where I was off foryears, like two, three years.
Speaker 3 (49:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (49:50):
Because it's just not worth the fight.
Speaker 3 (49:51):
No, it's not.
Speaker 1 (49:52):
But at the same time, I can agree with both of you
where there's boundaries thatare able to be respected and
there's things where it's likethere's certain things that are
uncalled for.
Totally, yes, like things hereand there, but if you look at it
as like there's 200 likesyou're looking at and if
everyone is an OnlyFans girl orsomeone that this guy doesn't
know you like?
Speaker 3 (50:11):
come on, have a healthy balance of like equal
men and equal women.
That's cool Because I likestuff there, of course.
Speaker 1 (50:18):
I think we talked about this the other day.
Like I will scroll and there'sstuff I like I'm like you should
probably not Not do that.
Do that Just out of respect,yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (50:28):
And it's normal to think like girls are hot, like,
yeah, it's normal to be in arelationship and think at the
other side.
It's just do you care aboutyour relationship enough to have
respect for that partner?
Absolutely.
And you just make decisionsbased on that.
Speaker 1 (50:39):
It's active.
Speaker 2 (50:39):
Well even in a friendship.
When I first met Roger, hedidn't have social media and, as
a woman looking at a man likethat, I was like I respect the
fact that this man is not, and Ifeel that because I'm the one
that pulled him.
I was like, look, you need tobe on Instagram or the podcast,
but there is somethingattractive about people who are
(51:00):
not on social media.
Speaker 1 (51:01):
Absolutely.
But it's also like we exchangemessages, like will text and
will DM, and we just always talkin various communication
platforms and sometimes she'llmessage me so like great, so
many great things on Instagramand I literally don't check for
days hours because I just Idon't think to go on there.
Speaker 3 (51:19):
I think that's a good , that's a green flag.
Speaker 1 (51:20):
I just don't, I really don't.
Speaker 3 (51:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (51:22):
I'll text her back sometimes before I reply to a DM
.
Speaker 3 (51:24):
Well, that's why, if you like need them, you're like
text them, yeah, yes, yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (51:30):
But should we do our close up?
Yeah, that's so funny Becausewe definitely want our audience
to come back.
This has been an amazingepisode.
Speaker 3 (51:39):
Thanks for having me, you guys.
Speaker 1 (51:40):
You are just radiant energy Great person.
Speaker 3 (51:43):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (51:43):
Really mesh well with us.
Speaker 2 (51:45):
Absolutely.
I feel like.
I feel like we've made alifelong friend, yes, oh my gosh
Like we're going to.
Speaker 3 (51:49):
there's no doubt in my mind that we're going to
collaborate.
Speaker 1 (51:51):
You're not a part of our network.
You're a part of our ourselves.
Speaker 3 (51:53):
Literally.
Yeah, literally will be in achat with us Like yeah, it's
bigger than anything.
Speaker 1 (51:58):
Like we are connected to you, we love it we're just a
good human.
Oh sorry, I think the worldshould know that, and hopefully
this episode does that I hope so, and we want the rest of the
audience to know to come backfor our next episode.
Speaker 3 (52:10):
In the lobby baby.
Speaker 1 (52:10):
In the lobby Because they know it's going down.
Speaker 3 (52:14):
We should do another episode at the end of this year
and see how like Austin datinghas been.
Oh, yeah, yeah and then we haveto.
Speaker 2 (52:21):
We always say this and I think this is bad.
I think I need to stop sayingthis but where can people go to
stalk you on like social media?
Yes, I'm going to get I feellike I can't say the stock thing
, but it's not Stock me actually, if you're hot, it's social
media stock.
Speaker 1 (52:34):
I think that's fair.
Speaker 3 (52:34):
So my personal Instagram is Jen Kroosha Haer
J-E-N-N-C-R-O-S-H-A-W.
It's a personal and hair photos.
I can't keep up, I can'tseparate things, so I just do
like a life in hair.
That's like my personal.
But my podcast is Gen Z podcastJ-E-N-N-Z podcast.
(52:55):
I'm a 2N, jen.
I have a theory on 2N it's onefor nice and one for naughty.
Speaker 2 (53:01):
I love that yeah.
Speaker 1 (53:03):
So what's new?
Speaker 2 (53:03):
is because we've done the collab.
People will have this episodein the lobby and then we'll have
another episode on Gen Z.
Speaker 3 (53:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (53:12):
There's a version of like listening in here listening
in there.
Speaker 3 (53:15):
Yes, it was so fun.
Speaker 1 (53:15):
Yes, and like we're going to get some good stuff.
Speaker 3 (53:18):
Yeah Well, thank you so much.
Oh my gosh, thanks for havingyou guys.
I adore you.
Speaker 1 (53:22):
This is awesome.
Speaker 3 (53:22):
This is just the beginning.
Speaker 1 (53:24):
I love it.
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