Tanner Friesen & Brooklyn Browning on Building Community, Overcoming Divorce, and Creating Secret Disco Society

Episode Transcript
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(00:12):
I am so excited to have you guyshere, Brooklyn Browning and
Tanner Friesen.
Not only are you guys like oneof the most gorgeous couples, I
think in Austin but you guys areconnectors.
I don't think the city's everhad anyone like the two of you
just genuinely bringing peopletogether.
Um, you guys have your fingersin like a variety of different

(00:34):
things from events to sportingactivities to fashion.
Um, so I'm so excited to haveyou both here.
I wanna jump into like a littlebit about.
Both of you.
So I don't know, Tanner, do youwanna kick it off and give a
little bit of background aboutyourself?
Sure.
Thanks for having us too, bro.
Right.
This is, this is awesome.
Instead of is cool.

(00:54):
That's so cool.
Cool.
Appreciate, appreciate youhaving us.
Uh, yeah, my quick background.
Born and raised in North Dakota,one of the few who got away.
I've been here for like four anda half years and I've met one
person from North Dakota here.
So not, not too many of us getout.
All my friends are back therehaving babies, raising a family
and all that kind of stuff.
Uh, I went to college in SouthDakota.
Uh, moved nine times in threeyears, um, and fortunately ended

(01:17):
up here.
So I've been here for like fourand a half years.
I call Austin home now.
Don't really wanna leave.
Love it here.
Built a really cool community ina bunch of different ways.
So yeah, been around and, uh,happy to be here.
That's for sure.
Yeah.
What is North Dakota like?
Whew.
It's, uh, I always say, I'mlike, I'm really glad that I
grew up there.
Like it's a really cool place tocall home and say like, that's
where my roots are from.
I grew up on a ranch.

(01:38):
My dad's a cowboy and the onlytime I've seen my dad cry is
when his horse died.
You know, he's he's, he's, he istrue, true North Dakota blood
like that.
Everybody knows everybody.
There's no diversity.
It's cold, it's quiet.
Which, you know, growing up it'ssuper safe.
So, growing up it's awesome.
Um, you don't know anydifferent.
I've definitely, uh, had anumber of different experiences,
you know, as I've moved so muchand really actually been able to

(01:58):
see, see the world for what itis, which is, which has been
amazing and I've kind of beenable to experience on my own
versus, you know, throughsomeone else's eyes.
But yeah, glad, glad I can callit home.
Uh, It's, it's small.
It's cold.
Just like everybody says whenyou leave like North and South
Dakota, just the same thing.
It's just the Dakotas, it'swhatever those states are up
there cuz nobody's, other thanMount Rushmore, I don't think

(02:20):
anybody's ever been ever been toeither.
So I've seen a sliver of it.
Yeah.
Really it's just, Yeah.
Have you gotten back, gone withhim?
Not, he won't take me.
Oh, okay.
But I don't think that it's likea me thing.
It's a North Dakota thing.
Yeah.
I don't really have a desire togo back, like, yeah, I don't
really stay in touch withanybody anymore.
My parents do live there, but mybrother worked for Delta, so my

(02:40):
parents can fly for free.
So it's, do I pay to fly toNorth Dakota or, or they come to
us for free they come here forfree.
Right.
Especially like, I'm alwaysworking, so, I mean, for me it's
always on.
It's a lot harder for me to getaway for three, four days
versus, you know, they've hadthe same job for years where
it's super easy and exciting.
It's like a vacation for themevery time they come.
So yeah, the Fairmont right downthe street, that's their spot.

(03:01):
That's like my mom's, she mightas well rent a place there.
She's, she's there not reallylike, have a permanent residency
there.
Yeah.
She just, uh, she has called me.
She's like, I need you to putthis date on the cal.
I was like, all right, whenshe's like, July 29th, we're
coming for our 40th anniversaryand we wanna spend it in Austin.
And I was like, I was like, one,congratulations.
Two.
That's really cool.

(03:21):
I was like three, likefortunately, like I wasn't at
the wedding, so why do you wannacelebrate with me?
I wasn't even there yet.
Like, shouldn't like you and dadlike take that time?
And they're like, no, we wannabe with our family.
So that's, that date's on thecounter end of July.
They're, they already booked theFairmont, they're they're
getting uh, dinner with Jacob onearth comparison, screw
Disneyland, and, and all that.

(03:43):
So, yeah.
Um, I think I've only been back,so I graduated college 12 years
ago and I think I've only beenback twice.
Wow.
Once was, cuz I was moving fromToronto to Idaho, so I was just
driving through, the other timewas for like an alumni baseball
game and so I snuck up when Iwas in Denver.
It was like a, a long drive, butI wanted to go check it out for
a weekend.
So I snuck up there.

(04:03):
That's the only two times I'vebeen home since, since I
finished college.
Yeah, you're really not sellinglike North Dakota to me.
Like, I don't really know if Iwanna go visit.
I mean, there's, there's I'mtalking, I know there's, there
really isn't.
There's like, as far as like, soNorth Dakota's the least tourist
state they have uh, it's calledlike the 50 club cuz it's the
50th state most people visit.

(04:24):
So it's, I was like the lasthop, uh, south Dakota's awesome.
So I went to college in RapidCity, which is where Mount
Rushmore is Black Hills.
It's like one of the mostbeautiful landscapes ever, but
it's just kinda like this littlehidden gem southwest corner of,
of South Dakota that's, youknow, dropped dead gorgeous.
But just nobody knows about itcuz it's so far outta the way,
your only options is to fly intosome, you know, small airport in

(04:44):
the middle of nowhere.
So it's, it's, it's unique.
Yeah.
I don't, I don't need to sellanybody.
It's, it's a nice little keptsecret.
Yeah.
How long have you been inAustin?
Four and a half years.
Four and a half years.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I moved here from Denver.
I was in Denver for four years,then I moved down here.
Uh, been here for four and ahalf.
Yeah.
So This's the longest place I'vebeen.
Wow.
That's amazing.
What about you, Brooklyn?
I have been here for three and ahalf years now.

(05:05):
I moved here May, 2019.
Okay.
Yeah.
I came straight from Idaho.
I'm from Boise, Idaho.
Um, it is a great spot to live.
It's a beautiful spot to visit.
I love Idaho.
Um, lots of mountains, gorgeous.
Definitely would go back butwould not live there ever again.
Um, just not a whole lot I feellike for young entrepreneurial

(05:26):
people.
I guess I don't see a futurethere at all.
Kind of why I got out.
Um, yeah, I, uh, I was born inMissoula, Montana, and then I
moved Boise, Idaho.
And then, um, I went to schoolthere.
Went to, uh, Idaho StateUniversity in Pocatello, um,
transferred to Boise State.
And then I moved here aboutthree years later and I call

(05:48):
Austin home now.
I mean, I love this place and I.
Literally my entire family here,honestly, uh, we have the
coolest people here.
Everybody is, so, I don't know,everybody just really uplifts
you here in Austin.
I feel like, like everybody'syoung, entrepreneurial, we're
all here, honestly, to find abetter version of ourselves, and
I feel like that's kind of whatI, you know, what I did and kind

(06:12):
of what we have landed ourselvesinto.
Um, but yeah, I love Austin.
Yeah.
And then how long have you guysbeen together?
Three years.
Three years?
Almost four.
Yeah.
Wow.
Three and a half.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then we were talking aboutthis the other day, but how did
you guys meet?
We met, we met at a workoutclass.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So our buddies, uh, CJ and Izzywe're doing a workout class at,

(06:33):
uh, south Congress.
And so there, there was a roomin the back and they had a
couple partners and they wantedto do a, like a workout, just
show the space and stuff likethat.
And so we hot boxed like 60people in there.
Like the floor was completelytrenched.
Like you couldn't walk on thatfloor, not like step in sweat or
like a slip and slide And it wasgreat.
We didn't meet there.

(06:54):
Uh, we were in the same class.
You show up late, I think.
Fashion.
Fashion.
No, I showed up on time justlike the last person Yeah.
She got, she got the last spot.
Um, she she didn't actually meetme at the workout class.
I had to take a picture of herand some of my friends.
Wait, what?
I was the guy behind the camera.
I was the one that she asked tohold the phone so she could take
a picture with, yeah.

(07:15):
I don't remember this.
I don't remember this, butapparently he was the one that
took the photo.
But, uh, a bunch of us, like adozen of us went out to brunch
afterwards and then we ended upsitting right across from each
other.
So that's, that's how weactually met and like started,
started talking.
Was the rest like history afterthat?
Pretty fast.
Like super fast.
Yeah, very fast.
Yeah.
Yeah, definitely.
Yeah.
You were supposed to go to workthat afternoon.

(07:36):
Yeah, it's kind of a crazystory.
So I actually, um, I was workingthis, you know, I had just moved
here.
It was probably, see we met inlike end of July, end of July.
I moved here in May.
I didn't really have anyfriends.
Um, I was working this job justto kind of get me by until I got
into what I wanted to get into.
Um, I was like bartending and.

(07:57):
And so, um, I knew it wasn't myjob, you know, that I wanted to
be in, that I was gonna stay in.
And so it didn't really havemuch value to me.
And so I was supposed to go intowork that afternoon.
I met Tanner and all theseawesome cool people, and I was
like, okay, they're all goingout to get lunch and they're
going to Barton Springs andthey're gonna go out, do all

(08:19):
these fun things.
This is my first time meetingpeople, um, in Austin.
Um, am I gonna just quit my jobjust on the spot, which I do not
recommend doing.
You know, it's not a good, not agood look.
Don't do that.
But, It was life-changing.
And so I called my boss and Iwas like, Hey, I'm not coming
into work today.
Basically I quit and I didn't gointo work.

(08:41):
And then I was able to go toBarton Springs and that's really
where we hit it off was atBarton Springs.
Um, but gotta go there and methim and all these amazing, fun
people.
And so that's what changed mylife here.
Honestly.
If I never would've just said,you know, F it, quit my job, go
hang out with these people, Iliterally would've never, we

(09:01):
probably wouldn't be together atall right now.
And I wouldn't be friends withany of the people I'm friends
with now.
Isn't that cr I feel like aninnocent.
Yeah, it was.
You change your whole life.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, that one decision I waslike, and it's not me.
Like, I've always kind of beenlike a goody good with that kind
of stuff.
Like, you know, like straightA's, like be like top of my
class.
I do really well with my job.
Like successful?

(09:21):
Yes.
And like shy to call in sick andstuff, you know, if I'm like
dying.
But I was just like, you knowwhat?
the universe is telling me thatI have to do this and I don't
know anybody here.
So Yeah.
I'm lonely.
So I just, yeah.
Cause it didn't, it's not likewe even like begged you or like,
you gotta come with us.
No.
Yeah.
We were just like, this is whatwe're, I don't even know if like
we invited you just told youwhat we were doing.

(09:43):
You know, they were like, we're,we're gonna go here next, like,
do you wanna come and stuff?
And I was like, I have work.
I literally went home and I waslike, I'm not getting ready for
work.
I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go backand meet them.
So I like put my swimsuit on,like, you know, made sure to
wear an extra cute one.
and And then when I met them.
But yeah, we didn't, we didn'teven know you were coming like

(10:03):
all our, I just showed up.
Yeah.
I don't even know if any of ussaid your number and all of
sudden we were just sitting downat the bottom and Brooklyn came
outta nowhere and we're like,Hey, you're supposed to be
working Yeah.
Yeah.
That's amazing though.
Mm-hmm.
sometimes intuition, like itwas, yeah, a hundred percent.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then you guys both I thinkhave been married.
Before.
Yep.
Yes.

(10:23):
Do you wanna jump in?
Do you wanna jump into yourrelationship prior?
Yeah, yeah, I got it.
Do you wanna jump intoBrooklyns?
Yeah.
I got married right outtacollege, so super young, super
naive.
Um, had started dating someonein my last year of college.
I knew with my new job I wasgonna move around a lot.
and didn't really take it thatserious.
Didn't really even think ofanything.
And then I had a conversationwith my parents, like right

(10:44):
before I graduated, and they'relike, well, what are you guys
gonna do?
I was like, I'm sure she'll justcome with me.
And they like, put this weirdpressure on me like, you're not
moving with your girlfriend.
You know, I grew up in like avery religious, like,
conservative, you know, family.
And so they kind of put thatpressure on me.
They're like, no, you can't movewith your girlfriend.
And I didn't like, I look up tomy parents like big time, like
my parents are like my idols,you know?

(11:05):
I do anything I can to be likemy dad.
That's like someone, someone Ilook up to more than anybody.
More than I ever will.
And so like the last thing Iever want to do is like
disappoint'em, right?
And so, I, I had like supercandid, I was just like, talked
to the girl and like, she wasawesome.
And I was like, so this is kindof how I feel.
Like, should we get married orshould we just like split up And

(11:28):
of course, like we are young,we're, I know we're young.
How old is this?
I was 21.
Okay.
Yeah.
So 22.
Yeah.
So like, we were young, we werein love.
We're like, let's try it.
Like let's do it.
Like, we were excited, we didn'tknow anything better.
Yeah.
And so did it.
She had never been away fromhome, so she was like, born and
raised in Denver, had nevermoved before.
Um, my first assignment, I wasthere for two weeks and then it

(11:51):
was, Hey, you have yourpassport, right?
I was like, yeah.
Like, all right, you're going toToronto when?
In two weeks.
So it's like the first time shehad uprooted and left her
family.
We at this new spot, two weekslater, it's like, oh, by the
way, we're going to a differentcountry.
Like, you're not gonna have aphone like his, because back
then, like Verizon didn't haveinternational plans or anything
like that.
This was, you know, 12 yearsago.

(12:12):
And so, It was, it was hard fromlike, from the get-go.
So it was, we were married forsix years, we were married for a
while.
Um, just kind of gutting it out,trying to, trying to make it
work.
Um, it's, it's amazing to seethat, like if you made a list of
like all these things that,like, you really, you really
need that have to be perfect.
Like, we lined up on almost allof them and it, it still wasn't,

(12:32):
wasn't good enough just cuz youlose your individuality, you
forget like who you are.
You become dependent on someone.
And firsthand I saw howdangerous that was.
Yeah.
Um, but yeah, so after movingseven times in the first two
years, I was like, all right,this is fair Like, I get it.
Like, this is too much, this isnot cool.
Um, got a new job, moved back toDenver with her, and was

(12:54):
supposed to stay there and thengot an opportunity to come down
here for work.
And I was like, the hardestthing was like, oh no, I have to
have this conversation becauselike the, the opportunity was
amazing for me.
Like it's what I wanted to do,but.
what came with it was exactlywhat I didn't want to do.
And so the plan was for her tolike kind of bounce back and

(13:14):
forth.
Um, I moved down here and I wassupposed to move down here for
like two weeks, go back and gether.
And that two weeks, like wenever talked.
Oh no.
It was always like, Hey, sorry,I'm busy or I'm doing this.
And like I, I was still kind ofnaive cuz I just figured like it
was gonna work.
And then when I went back I waslike, oh wait, like this isn't,
like, you're not coming, areyou, you know, had like a super

(13:35):
serious conversation and it wasjust made a very mature
decision.
It's better for her to stay upthere, it's better for me to
come here.
But I started from scratch.
I only knew two people inAustin.
Wow.
So it's kind of funny, like thereason you were like talking to
me is like about all thesecommunities and stuff we built.
For six years, I moved aroundand had one friend, you know,
moved around all these placesand completely lost who I was.

(13:58):
Cuz anybody who knew knew me incollege.
I knew every single person oncampus, you know, in high school
I knew every single person.
Not in my high school, but likein every high school around us,
you know, that was, that was whoI am.
And so I kind of, you know,never once pointed a finger at
anybody else, like, you know,going through a divorce or
anything.
I just looked myself in themirror and said, doesn't matter
who did what?
Like, how can I get better?

(14:19):
Like, how am I different?
What can I change?
Like who, who am I, I think the,um, the conversation that like
changed everything for me is oneof the two people I knew when I
moved down here.
Um, she was, she had beenmarried to one of my college
basketball teammates and so she,she had been through it.
She was, you know, a year or twoahead of me.
She knew exactly what I wasgoing through.

(14:40):
We have like super similarpersonality, super similar work
ethic, and she, she sat me downone time and she is like, what
do you want to do tomorrow?
And the second, like, I paused,she's like, I thought so.
I knew it.
I was like, what do you mean?
She's like, you don't know whatyou wanna do tomorrow.
Like, you don't know what makesyou happy.
She's like, you've completelylost yourself.
And it like, I was like, oh,wow.

(15:01):
I didn't even like thought ofthat.
So she's like, sit down, come upwith a bunch of stuff that'll
make you happy and just go do itand start living your life that
way.
So the next day I packed up,jumped in my car, drove like two
hours, went on a hike out in themiddle of nowhere, all by
myself, flew my drone around,and I was like, oh, that was,
that was super fun.
And guess what?
I did it all by myself.
Yeah.
You know?
And so that just changed mymentality from, from that day,

(15:23):
um, to a fault.
I've always been, you know, whatdo I wanna do today?
What do I want to do today?
And let that drive me always.
So, yeah, it was.
It was definitely an eye-openerfor me.
It was definitely hard starting,starting from scratch I guess
you could call it.
But really it was just melearning the hard way, you know
who I am and remembering who Iam and then now I just know like

(15:46):
that's non-negotiable.
That'll, that'll never changeagain.
And so that's who I am now andmakes it real easy to live my
life.
Yeah.
At what age?
Like cuz you got married at 21?
Yeah, I was 22 so I moved herewhen I was 28.
Okay.
So when you were 28 and thenafter you got out of that
relationship, did you like takea lot of time?
Do you feel like to like focuson yourself?
Like were you single for alittle while?

(16:07):
I didn't go on a date for ayear.
She's the first person I took todinner.
Yeah.
I just, for me, and it wasn'teven the fact that like I wasn't
open to it at all.
Like one I was finding myself,but I think for the most part I
found myself pretty quick.
I had a couple people that camethrough my life that were, you
know, invaluable to that.
That I don't think I would'vechanged if it wasn't for them.
And the crazy thing is like noneof them are even in my life

(16:29):
anymore, is just like the rightpeople at the right time.
Mm-hmm.
helping me, helping me learnthose things.
Um, but I knew how, how good ithad to be to actually work.
So, you know, I met a bunch ofgirls that I was like, you're
awesome.
You're a great person.
This little thing, it's notgonna work.
So like, let's not waste eitherof our times, like respectfully,

(16:51):
like.
It's not gonna work.
And that's okay.
Cuz guess what?
We can be friends and that'sgonna last forever.
Versus, you know, someone, youtry and try to force it and then
all of a sudden doesn't work.
There's these expectations andthen you never talk again
because there's so many coolpeople in Austin.
Like, I couldn't imagine like,if I would've burned some of
those bridges and not had someof the, some of the friends I
had.
So like, the cool thing with heris like, I wasn't looking like

(17:11):
if, if anyone was sitting acrossfor a whole brunch across from
her, like they would just bedrooling, like begging begging
her back, begging her to comestop, come over and like come to
Barn Springs, like come hangout.
Like let's go on a date.
All this kind of stuff.
Sweet.
We naturally were just able totalk, like, you know, she was
like asking about my tattoos,asking just different, different

(17:31):
questions, whereas super simple,like there's no pressure that
makes it, makes it real easy.
So yeah, I didn't, I didn't goon like a proper date, like I
was on like Bumble or whateverthe dating apps were.
And it's just like you get totalk to people, you talk to'em
for a few minutes and you'd belike, Nope.
like, yeah, Like, not in a badway, it's just like, right.
Oh, that, that one's.
That one, we're gonna fight forno reason.

(17:52):
Right?
Yeah.
Like, what's the point, or, I'mgonna stretch you out.
That's while we're ahead.
Yeah, I'm, I'm gonna do what I'mdoing anyway, and I know that's
gonna stretch you out, so what'sthe point?
So, yeah, it was, um, I don'tknow.
It was, it was pretty naturalfor me.
Yeah.
Because I feel like you guysboth, like, you know, were
married and then went throughdivorces, right.
At like a very young age, right?
Because you're 33.

(18:13):
Yeah, I'm 33.
You're 33, you're 26, right?
Mm-hmm.
And then I feel like a lot ofyoung people, when they get out
of relationships, they likeimmediately like.
right back into them.
That was kind of me.
I think, I think everyonehandled it different
differently, but I have like alot of respect for the fact that
you like, did take the year tolike, kind of like, be like,

(18:33):
okay, I gotta reassess.
And then when it was put meantto happen mm-hmm.
Brooklyn.
It did, you know, and it workedout perfectly for you guys.
Yeah.
So, yeah, there's, there'sdefinitely not a right way to
handle it.
I mean, there's, yeah, it's ahundred percent individual
based, you know, a lot of peopleprobably don't learn, you know,
it's, it's real easy to cover itor hide the fact, or just flat
out, like, as easy as it is toalways point the finger at

(18:55):
somebody else, like, what's thatgonna get you?
Mm-hmm.
So the fact that, like, I tookthat mentality, it really helped
me.
She was very similar.
So like when we started talking,like she was going through the
same thing and I, with how youngshe was, I was so impressed,
like, cuz I, without, you know,having to say anything, like I
knew exactly where she was at, Iknew what she was going through,
but I could also see how she washandling it.
And I was like super surprised.

(19:16):
I was like, how are you thisyoung and like, have gone
through all this, have seen allthis.
And of able to like make thesedecisions.
I was like, at that age, Iwould've never made that
decision.
I would've I would've been soclueless.
And so that made it a lot easierfor us, like talking afterwards
too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So then jumping back intoBrooklyn, cuz you were married
mm-hmm.
and I don't know, did you cometo Austin by yourself or did you

(19:39):
come here?
No, with him.
So yeah, I moved here, um, inMay, like I said, 2019 with my
ex-husband.
Um, you did move with him?
I moved with him.
Okay.
Yeah.
And so we were together for sixyears, but only married for one.
Um, we were high schoolsweethearts and so we met my
senior year of high school and,you know, we're, you know, madly

(20:02):
in love, young state or whateveryou think it is.
Um, we had a really goodrelationship, honestly, all the
way through for the most part.
Um, you know, minus the littlelike young fighting things and
you know, your early teen orlate teens.
Um, but we went to collegetogether.
We were good.
We lived together all throughoutcollege.

(20:23):
Um, moved back to Boise, livedtogether then.
Um, so we lived together prettymuch for five years.
Um, and then, you know, therewas never anything where it was
like, A big fight or constantfighting that drove us apart
necessarily.
I think it was just genuinely,we were on such different paths,

(20:45):
um, and holding each other backfrom those paths.
Um, I feel like I was definitelythe one that saw that more so
him, but I honestly think thathe has benefited from it more
than I have.
Um, and in the moment I don'tthink that he really saw that,
but I was holding him back a lotfrom his potential and what he
really wanted.

(21:05):
You know, I have a very strongpersonality and I do have a
tendency to, you know, like myway or the highway, and I kind
of needed somebody.
He would give the worldessentially.
He would just be like, yes,you're way or the highway, you
know, like Brooklyn is on top ofeverything.
Yep.
Okay.
Whatever you say constantly.
I can't get away with that, withthis guy.

(21:25):
And it's like, and that'shonestly what I needed.
Like I needed.
A strong personality as well,um, in the relationship with me
to reel me in or to, for me tolook up to, you know?
Um, and that's just kinda whatdrove us apart was that he was
lacking there.
And I was not accepting himreally for who he was.

(21:45):
It was more like I wanted toconstantly change this person
and mold this person into what Iwanted them to be because I
didn't want to waste so manyyears of my life, you know, and
just like give up.
So I just kept trying to changehim and change him and change
him.
Um, eventually, I think it wasabout, honestly, pretty much the
whole year of us being married,I was checked out.
Um, and it wasn't checked out inthe sense of I knew I was

(22:09):
checked out, but it was so muchmore of like, I loved him in a
different way than.
you're supposed to love aspouse.
You know, I loved him for theperson he was and thought he was
great.
Almost more of like a brotherlylove.
Right.
You know, and like, or like abest friend, like don't say
brother, that's kind of creepy.
a best friend type of love.

(22:29):
Um, and so I just stuck for solong cause I was just like,
well, I love him.
You know, like of course.
Like that's how it's supposed tobe.
So, you know, and then I movedto Austin and it was, I, in my
head I was kind of thinking,well maybe things will change,
you know, once we move and maybewe just won't have all these
other people.

(22:49):
Around us or like looking at uslike a fresh start.
That's just what we need for meto like get back into like this
love with him, you know?
And it just made it worse.
Of course.
You can't just move somewhereand then expect it to be better.
Um, and so I saw everything thatmy life was lacking.
Honestly, when I moved here, Iwas just like, okay, yeah.

(23:10):
Like I can't get to this pointif I'm still gonna be married to
him, unfortunately.
And it has nothing wrong, youknow, nothing to do with him
being wrong or him nothing.
You know, he was great.
He was a great person.
It was just our lifestylesweren't gonna end up matching up
together.
Um, so I broke things off, um,shortly after Met Tanner.

(23:33):
Honestly, it was just very, um,unexpected, very unexpected, how
fast, uh, I met him because Iwas just in this state still
just kind of like.
Okay, this is, you know, myentire life just changed.
And my, like he was saying, mybest friend is now not my best
friend anymore, and my bestfriend is gone outta my life.

(23:55):
What am I gonna do?
You know?
Um, so it was like, he was likemy angel that came in, you know?
But I was at the same time, liketerrified.
Cause I was like, I was callingmy mom every day, like, am I am,
am I able to do this?
Like, and I was like, mom, likehe wants to take me out to
dinner on my birthday.
Like, I don't know if I shoulddo this.
And she's like, Brooklyn, don'tdo it.

(24:15):
And then I like explainedeverything about him.
She's like, oh my God, do it.
Don't let him get away.
shout out mom But, um, yeah, sothat's, that's kind of my story.
Um, and I still talk to my exhere and there.
Um, mainly just checking in,like, hey, like, hope is all,
all is well, like happybirthday, or, you know, just

(24:37):
random things like that.
But, um, we both wish each othernothing but the best and.
I'm just very fortunate to havesomebody that I was married to
like him because it could havebeen ugly and it wasn't.
And I feel like I still willhave a friend no matter what, or
have somebody to go to no matterwhat.
But I feel like that's the typeof relationship it should have
been in the first place, youknow?

(24:58):
And now I have that, so it'sgood.
Right?
Yeah.
I mean, cuz you guys were soyoung too, when you were
married.
Mm-hmm.
I always wonder like, cause Ialways look at myself, right?
I'm like, so, cause I'm single,so I'm like, if I get married,
like I would be terrified tolike give up like the financial
aspect, right?
Oh yeah.
Like, I'm not making my ownmoney.
So like, in y'all'srelationships, like, were you

(25:18):
guys like 50 50?
Were you the provider?
Like, what did that look like inboth of your relationships?
Just curious.
We were both pretty similar.
I, I was a provider for sure.
Yeah.
By the way, shout out to casp.
Being single over here.
I know.
Uh, yeah, I mean, yeah, I was, Iwas a hundred percent the
provider.
Um, I was, we were literallymoving around for my job.

(25:41):
So yeah, it was, I didn't, Ididn't really have an option.
I'm, I was working anyway, soyeah, that was, that was all, a
lot of, a lot of the pressure onme and that made it hard.
So I would be super curious likewhat it's like, you know, after
actually establishing yourselfand then like giving up that
freedom.
Cuz like when I got married, wewere both young, broke, had
nothing else, like nothing toour names, right?

(26:02):
Like paid for my own wedding,like outta my pocket.
They cleared out my savingsaccount.
Ring wedding done.
Right.
broke.
Broke as can be starting fromscratch.
So, you know, being in the pointI am now after like,
establishing myself, likefinances are tricky too.
So like trying to go out andlike merge that with somebody,
it would be, would be superinteresting.

(26:24):
Yeah, that's, that's crazy.
I mean, you guys like, were bothkind of like the, I feel like
the provider and then you guyscame together too, which is
cool.
Yeah.
Because like obviously you bothhad like that hustle and kind of
motivation and fire that youguys like both brought together
too.
So It's so weird, like when shepulls out her credit card,
whenever, like if we go out todinner or something like that,
I'm like, what are you, what areyou doing It is, and it really

(26:45):
is weird, you know?
Yeah, that's funny.
Yeah, that's um, that's, that'san interesting point too.
Yeah.
What if, well too, becauseyou're talking about your
parents, like their 40thwedding, an anniversary.
So we know that your parentswere like really conservative.
They're from North Dakota.
Are your parents the same way?
Um, no, not really.
Um, my, my parents are separatedbut remarried both when I was

(27:08):
very, very young.
So I got very lucky.
I grew up with two sets ofparents and I don't care what
anybody says, that's twoChristmases, that's double set
of dinners and presents and allthe things.
Um, but.
I got very lucky as well.
My stepparents are both the mostincredible people.
I mean, he's met them andthey're, they're the sweetest
people, but I not, I would notsay super religious.

(27:31):
My mom's side way more so.
Yes.
Um, mother grew up religious andeverything.
My mom's whole side isreligious.
Um, dad's side, not so much.
Um, I guess my grandpa was apastor though.
My dad's dad so I guess, yeah,But I did not grow up super
religious.
No.

(27:51):
Um, we were in church.
Um, but my mom more so was kindof like, okay, well you pick
your own path.
Um, it was never forced upon me,I wanna say, but we were
definitely exposed to it.
Um, we did pray at night, all ofthat stuff.
Um, but again, it was neverforced, you know?
And that was never her.

(28:12):
Mindset on her, uh, decisionsfor me to make.
It was never okay, Brooklyn,well you need to tra stay true
to this.
You know?
It was like, what do you wannado and what do you feel like is
correct for your life?
It was never why I should do it,you know?
Right.
That's, yeah.
So pretty, pretty different.
Were your, were your parents thesame way?
Like when you were like goingthrough, through the divorce?

(28:34):
Like were they, you know, like,Hey, we just want you to be
happy, or was that like atougher, that was the hardest
thing I've ever done.
Yeah.
Was telling It was harder for meto tell my parents than actually
like, go through it.
Yeah.
You know, and like separate withmy ex, it was harder to tell my
parents cuz like grew up in avery religious family.
Super strong.
Like, you know, there's divorce.

(28:54):
Isn't anywhere in that whole,like on either side of my, you
know, parents', families, theyall grew up Christian and it
was, you know, just wasn't anoption over me not being happy.
Who cares, right?
Like, you just, you just don'tdo that.
You figure it out.
So that's, that was definitelylike the hardest part, I'd say.
Like how far, like me and myparents have like gone and how
much they've opened up over thelast, you know, few years has

(29:15):
been like, completely gamechanging for all of us Where,
you know, they truly see you.
You know what, what made mehappier?
What didn't make me happy?
Uh, so yeah, that was a hundredpercent the hardest part was
having that conversation with myparents.
Yeah, I would imagine.
I mean, I, I grew up in like asuper religious family too.
Like, my mom's Catholic, solike, you don't get divorced,
you know?
Mm-hmm.
But it's so hard because Ithink, you know, we know, like

(29:36):
our generation knows like, youhave to do what's right for you
and like, what's gonna make youhappy.
And it's like, what's the pointof staying in a marriage, you
know, just because of yourreligious beliefs.
Yeah.
Or you know, and I'm sure theysee you like, I'm sure they get
it more and more every day, likeseeing you so happy with this
one that it probably startsclicking and making and we get
along real well.

(29:56):
Yeah.
I'm sure they love you.
So, you know, it's, I don'tknow, I feel like it'd be so
tough to go through that and youguys went through it such young
ages.
Like, I, I can't even get onehusband.
Okay.
And I'm 20 So how about, howabout that?
So you being single, you're outhere in Austin dating.
Yeah.
Like how often do you run into aguy who's been married before or

(30:19):
a guy who has kids a questionversus, or is it just a bunch of
no people?
So first of all, okay, this iswhat I'm gonna say.
when you're walking arounddowntown, how often do you guys
see kids?
Okay, we always talk about thatKids do not exist in Austin at
all.
Thank goodness.
I do not I do, I do not knowwhere they all are.
Like, they like walk into theborders of downtown and they

(30:40):
just like drop into like anabyss because they do not exist
like dogs.
Every, every time, every time.
no, they turn into dogs.
every time I see a kid, like Ialways go to book.
I'm like, what's that?
What is that?
What's that date like?
Yeah.
Kids don't exist.
So like any of the guys I'm everdating or talking to, they've
never been married.
I don't think they ever wannaget married.

(31:02):
I think they wanna run around,like down town's the opposite.
So it's, it's a bunch of guysthat you don't trust.
Like if they take it serious.
Yeah.
Are these like dating app guysfor the most part?
Uh, yeah.
I, I feel like, I don't knowwhat, I don't know if it's would
be different, but I feel likehaving kids.
is like more of like a nondating app thing, you know, like

(31:24):
on a dating app.
I feel like less people havekids.
Um, just, I don't know.
I feel like that's more of likea younger Right.
Or like it is.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
But even running around Austin.
True.
Like, I never even thought aboutthis.
Just like all my like guyfriends, not one of'em, not one
of'em is like, oh, I just wannasettle down and have a family.
Like none of them, you know?
That's true.
And all of our friends are likeover 30 too.

(31:45):
Really?
So, yeah.
Yeah.
So it's, it's definitely adifferent culture here.
Huh?
So you see it, I guess, outthere.
Yeah.
Out there when you're dating.
Mm-hmm.
It's wild.
So is it hard to trust a guythen on a date if you're Uh,
it's not hard to trust a guy cuzlike, I feel like at this point
I have very hard like, highstandards.
Good.
Like I know what I put up withand I don't put up with, and
then like I'll start talking toa couple different guys and I

(32:06):
just.
run them around in circles.
Seeing you Watch out boys.
I know, I should.
I'm like, I'm like, I should nothave said that.
um, not run them around incircles cuz I'm like obviously
interested in them.
Yeah.
I'm just like, who's gonnaactually like show up, put them
to the test.
Yeah.
And put, treat me the right way,you know?
Yeah.
So that's kind of what I do.
I think the best thing to do isput'em around your friends.

(32:27):
Yeah.
And like, before it even likegets to the point where you're
like, you're like dating.
Like if there's a guy you'rekind of interested, like super
casually, invite him out, likeout with your friends and just
see how he like meshes witheverybody.
Yeah.
I'll just make you guys vet.
I'm not vet them.
We are very good at that.
I'll just bring him around.
I don't know if we're friends.
Would agree.
Yeah.
I feel like you guys havedetected it.

(32:47):
I I'm very harsh with my, I wasgonna say with who?
Like, so who, who my friendsbring around.
I'm like, who are you?
I mean, we just know it doesn'twork.
Right?
Right.
So it's like, one of like, myfriends will talk to me in like
day two.
They're like, oh, but this, Iwas like, so stop.
Like, what are you doing?
Like it's, if you're alreadycomplaining about it after like
day two, week one, even, youknow, a month or so in, like if

(33:10):
there's already those doubts,like it's not gonna work.
And by the way, like that'sokay.
And it already goes back to likewhat he was saying earlier.
It's like, stop on your head.
You know?
Because this person might bereally freaking cool and could
be a friend, but if you go andsleep with him on the second
day, like, okay, well now allyou just slept with your friend,
you know?
Yeah.
And it's like, okay, well nowyou can't really pew.

(33:31):
Pew My word of my, my word ofadvice.
I learned this.
I got this from my buddy Josh.
Oh my God.
So it's like awesome.
We joke like, cuz this town isso small, right?
Like you see the same peopleover and over again.
And are you saying that everyonesleeps with everyone?
When Josh, Josh goes up right toone of my buddies face-to-face,
he goes, Only take home thetourist, And it's like, that's

(33:54):
the best advice, like could giveany of our friends.
It's true.
It's really good.
You know, like if something goesbad, like we're gonna have to
see the same person through fiveof our different circles.
It's all our friends.
I was like, so if there's anytension, like guess what?
Like we're gonna be friends withthem on, on both sides.
So just don't mess it up.
Like Tanner, stay outta thecircle.
You don't have to tell me.
I've lived here my whole life,so Yeah.

(34:15):
you're like, my pool's beenshrinking.
Yeah.
I barely leave my house anymore.
I'm like, I don't wanna run intoanyone.
Thank you.
Oh my gosh.
It's true though.
Like once you go out, like youcould, you could go out by
yourself and by the end of thenight you could round up 40
people.
Like if you started, it's, it'sgetting a little busier now, but
before, like when it was supereasy to barhop, we'd go to West
and people would be like,where'd you go last night?
And you'd rattle off like 11bars cuz you'd just go one drink

(34:38):
and jump one drink and jump.
And it's like you'd grab fourpeople at each bar, then go to
the next one, grab another six.
Like that.
That used to be what it, what itwas like here.
Yeah.
Now it's so crowded.
And now I'm getting older andthere's a bunch of.
people that don't look like theyshould be in the bar.
In the bar.
So it's fake IDs.
It's, it's a little, they'rejust 21 year old kids.
It's like they're 12 yearsyounger than me, you know, like
Yeah.
When I was graduate.
That's true.

(34:58):
It's like, wait, are you outtaplace or am I outta place?
I know, I feel kinda old when Ilike go into the bars now and
I'm like, am I getting old or isit, that's like how old's too
old?
Like No, that's definitely beenthe nice thing about doing our
own events too.
Mm-hmm.
Cause like, you kind of likecurate what you want out of a
night versus, yeah.
Well like your guy friends whoare like in their thirties, if

(35:19):
they're not wanting to like, youknow, think about like, be in a
relationship and like, want kidslike.
What are they doing?
Because like, I'll get on datingapps and the guys are like, you
know, like, I'm not looking likeI'll go on a date with them.
They'll do some crazy stuff.
Like, I've had guys like,literally buy me like a bottle
of perfume.
Pick me up, take me to asteakhouse.
Wait, what?
Yes.
And then they're like, I'm nota, they, they tell me they tell

(35:43):
me, they're like, I'm notemotionally available.
I'm not interested in dating.
And I'm like, why the fuck areyou on a dating app and why are
you doing the most spoiling me?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like, is that how dating is?
No, no.
That's, that's a, my I have somestories, but I just, that just
seems like they're almost justtrying to fill like a hole or a

(36:03):
need in their life, right?
Yeah.
Just plug it in.
You see a lot of people too,I've seen that focus so much on
other people's problems.
You're just like, it's just cuzyou don't want to address your
own.
Right.
Like it's a lot easier to hidebehind, behind someone else's.
So it could easily be somethinglike that too, where it's just a
little insecurity and it's like,all right, I can hide it.
I can go out, have some fun, getsomeone a gift.
Like let that distract from likea real conversation.

(36:25):
No, it's not like, don't haveanybody to like spoil
themselves, you know?
Yeah.
So it's like, why not just do iton your dates?
Yeah.
You know, maybe.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Do you have like a lot of singlegirlfriends in Austin?
I mean, I feel like they're allpretty.
Oh yeah.
I feel like they're all prettysingle.
Yeah.
All my girlfriends.
How's that working for?
Yeah, they're all single forthem.
I'm not great honestly.

(36:45):
I mean, we were kind of talkingthe other day, like all my
friends have told me that thedating scene is trash.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I don't know, like, like wewere saying, like maybe you're
not looking in the right placesand whatnot, but.
I feel like I got freakinglucky.
I feel like, you know, I'm likemy first try and I snatched it
up.
I think you guys might be doingsomething good though for like

(37:06):
the dating scene in Austin, eventhough that's not like your
focus.
Mm-hmm.
But you guys found each other,you came together and then you
guys kind of started a passionproject together.
Right?
For sure.
That's kind of where SecretDisco Society came from.
Exactly.
I was saying, yeah, that's whatI wanna jump into because now
you guys have all these coolpeople at your events and like,

(37:26):
you know, maybe I can meet a guythere, one of your friends can
meet a guy there.
If not, at least I'm making likea bunch of cool friends, you
know?
Yeah.
I think one of the coolestthings is like seeing go to into
a concert and all of a suddenseeing some people from our
events be like, wait a second.
I know they didn't know eachother before one of our events.
Like, it happens a lot, we've,there's people that are dating
because of it.

(37:46):
Mm-hmm.
there's people that are friends,there's new groups that have all
all formed and we've always kindof pushed the social aspect.
So like secret disco, we startedit just cuz.
during covid, people neededpeople.
Like that's something wenoticed.
Like we have a lot of friendsthat are introverted, uh, and
they were struggling.
Like I could tell, like theyjust, you know, I don't really

(38:07):
understand like anxiety,depression, just cuz I'm always
up, like I always feel, feelgreat, but I totally get that
people are going through it andI could just like see it just
wearing on people and I'm like,I'll a hundred percent take the
leap, take the opportunity andlike use what I have my platform
and bring people together.
And so that was kinda one of thethings with secret disco where

(38:27):
we've always.
Not just try to throw thesecrazy events, but truly like try
to connect people through it andbring people together, because I
think that's what, that's what'smissing a lot.
You know, if you go to, youbring in a big artist, right?
And on that flyer is just thatbig artist and a couple
sponsors, right?
Like, everybody's just going forthem and as soon as that
person's done, they leave.
Right?
Versus we try to create ourevents based on activities and

(38:50):
people in a room where you canactually get that human
connection and, and talk.
I think that's what's, what'smissing in almost any community
is just that conversation piece.
So we try to find ways to likecreatively push it, and I think
that's what's like superpowerful.
Yeah.
And you guys did it, you guysco-founded it together and was
it like during the pandemic whenit first started?
My favorite story?
Yep.
Oops.

(39:10):
Um, it was my favorite story.
We were, it was middle of thepandemic, uh, new Year's.
We were trying to get togetherwith like 20, 30 of our friends.
We had a friend that had atownhouse.
Mm-hmm.
was back home in New Jersey.
Got covid for Christmas.
Yeah.
And couldn't fly back.
So since he tested positive, hecouldn't, couldn't come back and
we're like, well, should we goto his house without him?

(39:32):
Mm-hmm.
and like all of our friends werekind of relying on us.
Cuz like even before this, likeTanner and I were always the
ones to bring all of our friendstogether.
It was like, Hey Brooklyn, heyTanner.
Like what are we, what are wegonna do for this or for that?
You know, it was always likerelying on what our plans were.
And so we had invited probablylike, what?
Like at least like 25 to 30people and we're like, well,
crap.
Like now we don't have a placeto go.

(39:53):
And we like promised all thesepeople a place.
So honestly we like took it uponourselves.
But that's, that's how, is how Iam.
Like if something falls apart,I'm like, I'm an engineer,
right?
So I'm a problem solver.
There's a problem.
I'm cool.
Like, let me, let me find a wayto solve it.
If he says he's gonna like dosomething, like it is going to
happen.
Yeah, it will happen.
It wa it wasn't even reallyintentional.

(40:13):
It's like, all right, let's comeup with a plan B.
Who has a house?
Nobody has a house.
Okay, where do we go?
I started asking around and mybuddy Eric is like, Hey, some of
my friends have a dance studioup north.
And I was like, oh, that soundscool.
It was like a small dancestudio.
one bathroom mirrors on thewhole side and like these
production lights as paintedblack.
I was like, this is the coolestthing ever.
Like this is the perfect placeto come hide during New Year's,

(40:36):
cuz like cops were cracking downand everything.
I'm like, let's just come inhere, lock the doors and hide
It.
Only had one bathroom and so wemade a sign.
There was like, if you're a guy,go pee outside.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it was like a tiny bathroomtoo.
Um, but yeah, so we threw thattogether on like less than two
days and like 60, 70 peopleshowed up B Y O B, like we all
threw in 10 bucks to pay thedance studio so they could get a

(40:57):
little bit of money and thenthey could clean it afterwards
and stuff like that.
We like to party city and gotlike prom decorations, you know,
like the really, the decorationreally bad, like spiraled one.
Are those things calledstreamers, you know, where you
like spiral'em together?
Our buddy Preston djd for fourhours for free cuz he hadn't
done a gig in like, you know,two years.

(41:18):
Oh yeah, bro.
Good.
Just like, uh, screenshotted hisVenmo and went and took around
to every single person on theparty was like taking a Yeah.
Um, but it was awesome and like,it was literally instantly we
were like, let's keep doingthis.
Like, this is really cool.
We could just see like, peoplewere so happy to be around
people even though we had peoplethat were furious with us that
we did it, you know?
Yeah.
And it's.

(41:38):
In our opinions.
We were young, we were healthy,and like we thought that was
more important, you know,bringing our friends together.
And it really was like, it madea huge difference in a lot of
difference in a lot of people'slives.
Mm-hmm.
So we went for it.
As soon as we got done, like westarted planning the next one,
like immediately did aValentine's Day party back at
that same spot.
So that was like that Februaryand then March, the covid

(42:00):
restrictions lifted.
And so we thought like, allright, now the only reason
people are going to us is cuzwe're the ones taking the risk
and like trying to bring, bringpeople together.
And it's like all of a suddenscience now said it's okay to go
out.
And we're like, all right,everybody's just gonna go back
to the bars.
And we'd already built such acool little community, um, place
started reaching out to us.
And so we just went with it andwe started making friends with

(42:24):
all these DJ.
and like, okay, this is cool.
Like we can give them aplatform.
And also all these DJs came outof covid, I swear to God,
because like everyone learned,everyone was picking up a new
hobby, so they just like pickedup DJing, which thank God they
did.
But I feel like it was just likeall of a sudden, like, you're a
DJ now you're a dj.
Like we had all these peoplethat wanted to DJ for us, which

(42:45):
was really cool.
So, so yeah, we just, we justtook it and ran with it and
we've, we've kinda had like somecore values through the whole
thing.
So it's like we're communitybased, like we want to make an
experience too.
So we've had a bunch of peopleask, well, why don't you, why
don't you do this every singleweek at this spot?
We're like, that's, that's justthe same thing over and over
again.
People are just saying, we don'twanna be just another event
company.

(43:06):
Right.
We want it to be a specialcurated event.
Yeah.
Yep.
So do you guys have like anumber of events that you like,
try to do throughout the year oryou just kind of At least once a
month, but Yeah, about once amonth, but like, The first kind
of by awkward year, almost twoyears, it's like we are throwing
stuff on two weeks notice cuzsomeone come up to us and be
like, I've got this venue.
Like, what do you think?
I'm like, Ooh, let's come upwith this theme.

(43:27):
Like, let's get everybodydressed up.
Let's do it.
Um, you also kind of gotta becareful cuz now that shows are
back, like there's so many bigshows where we're not gonna
compete if there's a giant showat the Concourse, right?
Mm-hmm.
So, and also we don't reallywant to compete with those.
Like, we like those shows too.
So we want to coexist.
We don't want to do a night witha bunch of DJs that are local
that we really like and thennobody show up.

(43:48):
You know?
Cuz half of it's, half of it'sfor them.
The other half is, you know, forthe crowd and who has fun if
they don't get to meet anybody.
Mm-hmm.
so.
We don't plan super far out,like on purpose.
But yeah, I'd say we probablytarget like one, maybe two a
month.
Um, we don't like to overdo itfor sure.
Yeah.
Yeah, because I've gone to acouple of them and they're like
amazing.
Like they're so much fun.
I feel like you guys always havea theme.

(44:09):
There's always good people.
Like I told you guys the otherday, like, I get sick of going
into somewhere like Mayfair andseeing like the same people that
are always just buying bottleservice, service.
Like who knows what they'redoing with their life.
Like I feel like the people.
y'all's events are like on thepulse of Austin.
Like not only are they young andcool and nice, they also have

(44:29):
like successful careers and likea lot of other things going on.
So it's such like a niceenvironment to like make friends
and like meet new people.
And then you guys always do likedifferent themes, which yep.
I don't know, I'm, that's myfavorite part.
I'm like, I think my wholecloset looks like dress up.
So I'm all about, I love that atheme, like it's so fun.

(44:49):
So Yeah, and I mean, that's thething, like we want people to
get excited for it, you know?
Like, I mean, I have one of ourfriends, Heidi, she is always
dressed to the nines and shegets so excited about our
parties and she'll like send melike a screenshot, like, I just
bought this for this party.
And I'm like, that's exactlywhat this is supposed to be.
You know, people getting excitedand planning and being like,

(45:10):
okay, well I got my costume.
What are you gonna wear?
You know, like telling theirfriends and it's like, she
almost makes me wanna dress upmore, you know?
So it's like one of those thingswhere I'm not just like going to
the bar and just like dressed inthis.
I'm like, okay, I want peopletexting me like, what are you
wearing?
Okay, well I'm gonna wear this.
Like, what do you, you know,because it's exciting.
Yeah.
Especially for women.
I don't know.
Something much for men.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Is that, I love dressing up.

(45:31):
Dressing up with, yeah, dressingup is so much fun.
He, he has a bigger, like, dressup closet than I do.
I'm not even kidding.
Really?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
He's always, well, he's thingsHe's rocking pink hair right now
too.
Facts.
Yeah.
So he, he's definitely down todress up He's a little more out
there than I am.
I will say I lost a bit.
I lost a bit.
I had to I got volunteered for abit.

(45:54):
Yeah.
And she was gone for two weeks,so I said I'll just, I'm
literally never leaving again.
I like it.
No, it's cool.
Got That's for your pink.
Yeah.
I never would've thought likethree years ago that like I
would be a owner of twodifferent companies and both of
them, their main color is pinkYou know what?
And my like whole thing is likepink.
I love pink.
So we got pink lighting.

(46:14):
You're like the king of pinkover here.
I love it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's like a lot of pink worksout.
Yeah.
We got a lot of people to rockand realize, realize it's cool.
So Yeah.
So that's awesome though cuz youguys started out with like the
new year party and then howquickly did you realize like
this is something we're buildingentire business because you guys
have like.
Big sponsors now, like alcoholbrands, like beatbox beverages,

(46:35):
and like I've seen a fewdifferent alcohol companies and
all stuff.
Yeah, yeah.
Almost, almost every alcoholcompany in town has reached out
to us.
We've had, you know, differentdating apps, all sorts of
different, different companiesreach out and sponsor us, which
is really cool.
Mm-hmm.
I think like the best part aboutit is I've got a real job, so
I've never looked at it as abusiness.
Almost everything we make, like,we'll try to reinvest whether
it's in our equipment, in ourDJs, in our staff, you know,

(46:57):
over overpaying people, like,because we're so grateful for
what they do.
Uh, and we haven't reallyflipped that switch and try to
be like, all right, how do wemaximize profits?
How, what, what is this?
What is that?
We make sure that we don't losemoney on any shows and, and we
roll with it.
You know?
It's the only reason we chargeis cause that way we can cover
our costs.
If it didn't cost us anything,I, it'd be hard for me to charge

(47:18):
anybody that's like who I am.
I just want to create a reallycool, yeah, cool culture.
You know this, but we love whenwe gotta do free events.
Like I love that.
We actually love that.
Yeah, that's, that's, it's myfavorite thing to do is just
open the door, right?
Like, make it as, as inclusiveas possible.
There's been so many times whereit's like still slammed and
Tanner will be like, all right,like, stop making people pay.
And I'll just be like, open thedoor, cuz like he just wants

(47:40):
everybody to be there and enjoyit, you know, obviously towards
the end of the night.
But yeah, you know, it's not oneof those things where we're just
trying to monetize, monetize,monetize, which yes is nice, but
the end of the day it comes downto our community and are they
going to feel like they have ahome with us?
And that's kind of, I feel likesecret discount strives to do,
you know?
Right.
We have no discount codes, noguest list.
Right.
Yeah.

(48:00):
We, we do a, we do a cheaperticket the first day always for
whoever wants to support us nomatter what.
We don't even announce the showfirst day.
Here's our presale.
If you want to get it, great.
If not, then here's the ticketprice.
And all that is is for us to getto a number, number and cover
it.
And nothing's outrageous.
Yeah.
We try to make it affordable.
The person's like, Hey, can yougimme in for free?
I was like, Hey, like the onlyreason I'm charging cuz it cost
a bunch of money, like if youcan help support me, great.

(48:22):
If not, like mm-hmm.
You know, go grab a free drinksomewhere else.
Like, appreciate it.
But it's like, it costs, likeany, any event costs like
thousands of dollars to produce.
Like people have no clue.
Like sound is super expensive.
I mean, we're in a podcast pair,our DJs, this stuff is, this
stuff is so expensive.
You know, like equipment DJ islike, we want to pay them great.
Like we want to pay them betterthan anywhere else in town if we
can.
Right.

(48:42):
Like that's cuz we appreciatethem so much.
you know, photo, video, that'sexpensive.
That's the only reason wecharge.
But it's anytime we can getinvolved, you know, getting as
many people there as possible,it's, it's so much fun for me.
Yeah.
I think there's strength innumbers.
Like, there's something reallycool about just a lot of people,
you know, growing up in NorthDakota, like I was talking about
earlier, like everybody, youknow, looked like some little

(49:03):
Norwegian German white kid.
Right?
Like there's no diversity at allstill selling ya No, I gotta go
Yeah.
But that's also why they canhandle when it's 20 below zero
and it's like, all right,schools, school's actually gonna
start 10 minutes early becausewe all know what we're doing.
Like there's no, there's nosnowstorm, you know, delays or
shut downs.
Like there was, it waseverything shut down here last

(49:25):
week when it was 36 degrees andit's 30 below and they're,
everything's normal.
You know?
Right.
Because those people are toughas nails.
Yeah.
But like, also, like, I didn'treally grow up with a bunch of
diversity, so I think it's socool, like how diverse my, my
like friend group is here, youknow, that's one of my favorite
things.
Yeah.
About being in Austin is solike, that's the really cool
thing about our parties is weget people, you know, that.

(49:45):
make all sorts of differentmoney that look different, you
know, that are in all differentplaces of their life, young and
old, and they all get to share aroom.
Like that's, that's prettypowerful to me.
Yeah.
I feel like it's kind of sad toocuz we like start out our lives
with like such a sense ofcommunity.
Like going to like elementaryschool and middle school.
Like for sure we have all thesepeople like the same age around
us, you know, sports and thensports and all these different

(50:06):
things.
And then it's like as you get alittle bit older into your like
mid twenties, early thirties,it's like, I feel like you start
losing sounds like outtacollege.
Yeah.
Like, right.
Yeah.
Outta college you start losingthat community more and more.
Yep.
So this is something that like,gives you that sense of
community again, which issomething we all need, you know?
Mm-hmm.
um.
And then you guys are doing alot of events at Native hostel,

(50:28):
which I love native hostel.
It's an amazing venue.
But you're also doing some, likeif the Secret Disco Society
wasn't enough, you guys also dostuff with Sphere.
So I wanna jump into that alittle bit.
Yes.
And you guys have careers, whichI wanna touch on.
These are just your passionprojects.
Yes.
Go sleep, side, side hustle,kings, uh, yeah, sphere.

(50:51):
So Sphere is awesome.
Sphere's, uh, it started here aslike a soccer inspired fitness
community.
So it's very community based.
Uh, the guy who started MikeJabal, he used to play
professional soccer.
And so after he retired, he wentthrough this period where he was
like trying to stay in shape,trying to keep some touches on
the ball, but he realized howmiserable it was without that
locker room.
You know, he'd been used tohaving 15 guys in a locker room

(51:12):
his whole life.
Right?
Those are your best friends.
You do everything together,whether it's on the field, off
the field, and.
after anybody's done withsports, right?
That's instantly gone cuzeverybody goes, goes their
separate ways.
And so he created Sphere torecreate a locker room.
Well that's when I really liketurned the switch in.
Austin was when I joined Sphere.
So I moved here August when theyear I moved here.

(51:35):
I found Sphere in January.
So like I had that four monthswhere I was going through it
like deep hard, like reallyfiguring myself out.
And then I like got to the pointwhere I was feeling really good
at myself and like wanted to getout a little bit more.
And as soon as I jumped on onthe Sphere squad, like I felt
like I was part of a team, likeinstantly, like I was back to
myself.
And so that's why I've been sopassionate about, you know,

(51:57):
taking it over because I'd beenthere for about a year.
It was right before Covid allthe, all the people that used to
run it just all quit at theexact same time.
And.
well, this is how I met all myfriends, you know?
And it was for me, easy to makefriends and it, that was the
easy place for me to makefriends.
But for a lot of people, likethey don't have a real easy spot
to make friends.

(52:17):
And I was like, I'm not lettingthis die like this can make a
huge difference in everybody'slife.
So I just grabbed all the gearand didn't stop.
you know, and I've been, beendoing it ever since.
You know, I've volunteered foryears on it, just cuz I just
cared so much, so much about thecommunity.
But that's the coolest thing, islike, it's, again, it's another
thing that's very communitydriven.
Apparently I've got a theme,Yeah.
On, on what I like, but it'slike, I'm actually naturally

(52:40):
kind of introverted.
I'm like the last person to goup to some random person at a
bar or say a word in theelevator or introduce myself on
the plane.
But once I get to know somebody,or once I get introduced, I'll
talk to them for hours.
I don't believe that for like asec.
Cuz he's, yeah.
Yeah.
So it's like, I know a lot ofpeople don't see it.
You don't see it.
I need, I need that, like, thatstart and once it starts, like

(53:00):
I'll go, I'll go for days.
Right.
I find people so interesting,you know, how, how diverse
everybody is, how many differentstories everybody has.
But for me, you know, once I wasplaying a game of soccer, it was
r that was my introduction,right?
It wasn't a physical like, hi,my name's Tanner.
It was just a simple pass andthat was all I needed to feel
like I was, you know, friendswith them.

(53:20):
And so that's why like I've beenso passionate about sphere,
adding other cities, addingother sports to it.
Cuz it's like once you get likeone or two things in common,
it's really easy for people totalk and people to become
friends.
And I'd say like most of thepeople here that are in the club
are introverted.
You know, where it's, they needthat simple game to make them
feel, feel natural versus, youknow, just out in a, if you go
out to a random bar, you have noclue what anybody likes or what

(53:42):
their story is or what theirbackground is.
But it's like if you've gotfitness and you've got soccer,
those two things are already incommon.
Then it's just what's your name,where you're from, and you can
really get, get to know'embecause you already know that
you guys are connected in.
Right.
How intense is the soccerthough?
Because like, see, sphere issomething I would love to do.
Mm-hmm.
because I, I want thatconnection.
I wanna go be a part of a team.

(54:02):
Like, I like being athletic, butI'm like, I don't wanna go out
there and, you know, be somelike elite soccer team.
uh, we gotta, we gotta get youout there.
Not at all.
Yeah.
Everything's designed playspeed.
We've got people who've neverplayed before and we've got
people that playedprofessionally.
We've got people that are 18years old and Kent 68, and we're
all on the same field, which is,which is really cool.
Um, we actually purposely breakthe teams down to like five to

(54:23):
seven people so that it is moreintimate and everybody's
involved, involved no matterwhat.
So we're very intentional aboutit.
We make it super easy.
Um, we've got a really coolcombination of all, all skill
levels, which is, which is whyit's fun.
It's also why we're adding, likethe run club.
We start every workout or everysession with a.
So there's a little hit workoutfirst.

(54:44):
So it kind of gets your bodymoving and it takes the pressure
off at just being soccer.
Right.
It's this cool like fun fitnessconcert.
It's like fitness.
Yeah.
Fitness meets soccer.
Yeah.
So we've had so many people thathave come out, never played
soccer and now they love thegame.
Like my favorite thing is whensomeone buys their first pair of
boots.
Like they're like, Hey here's,here's my soccer shoes.
Like I'm ready to go now.
Like I've bought these off, offNike.
Like I'm ready, I'm ready toplay.
Like it's official, you know shejust got her first pair last

(55:06):
year.
Well I kind of bought'em foryou, but No you didn't.
I bought them.
We got, we got her on You kindbuy her in your pair I bought
them.
We got, we got her out on theball last year.
Oh yeah, that's right.
That's right.
Yeah's all, some all black Nikeshoes I bought, bought my own
She's even got her goal, hersignature goal celebration and
everything now.
So.
Oh really?
I I think Brooklyn is likedownplaying how good she is.

(55:28):
It's true.
It's true.
She is so true.
She hates to admit it, but everytime she scores this, it's, and
he'll call me out.
I'm like almost crying cuz it'strue.
I can't help it.
Like when I score.
I dunno why.
And it's like the total, it'slike both fingers out.
I dunno why.

(55:49):
But now it's, it's super fun.
Like, like I said, it's fitness,end of soccer.
Uh, we're building the newfacility here at, you know,
across the street at Native.
So we'll have that like fullyprogrammed fitness classes.
We added yoga, we're adding arun club.
Our buddy Justin's taking thatover.
Sierra's doing the yoga class.
Uh, it's, I think it's gonnaturn very fast.
Like probably over this summeris the biggest, you know, sports
social group.

(56:09):
So network in Austin and I thinkit's gonna absolutely take off.
And I think this will be the BRblueprint for where it goes
nationwide.
Yeah.
Brooklyn's gonna teach classes,right?
Yeah.
She's gonna teach Fin's classes.
Yeah.
If I can go and I'm gonna looklike Brooklyn, I'll be there
Every same.
Same.
I'm trying to get abs like that.
stop it.
Yeah.
No, it's, it's really fun andit's a really easy way to meet a

(56:31):
lot of people very fast.
And that's, that's the othercool thing about it is like the
group is so diverse where I maynot have that connection with
you, but.
I've got this group of a hundredpeople in this club and it's
like, oh wait, you're fromColumbia, so are these seven
players?
Wow.
You know?
Oh, that's one of the coolestparts I think, is that there's
like so many countries involvedin this.

(56:53):
Like it is insane when they goaround and it's all the
different accents too, cuz youstart with a huddle and you go
around and introduce yourself.
They all have such differentaccents and different names cuz
they're, they're from differentcountries.
So it's like these names you canbarely pronounce, but it is, I
don't know, I think that's oneof my favorite parts about going
to Sphere.
It's so cool.
Honestly.
Yeah, cuz yeah, I've never metanybody from South America, from

(57:16):
Central America, from Mexico.
Like we have, we have so manylike people that Argentina, like
all sorts of places and it'slike so cool.
Like people that you never wouldjust go up to and just talk to,
you know, because there's that,that fear of diversity and you
know, all that, that kind of isnatural and on the field it
doesn't matter, you know?
And then, We go to no shower,happy hours together.

(57:36):
And you just, you get to knoweach other.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And like the blood is, like, theball is a soccer ball.
Right.
So even though we'll expand intothese other sports, like it's
always a soccer concept.
And like, you never playedsoccer before, right?
No.
If I threw a ball on the ground,you know what to do.
Right.
You know, you gotta kick it.
No, I mean, I'm a little blonde,but like, maybe I'll figure it
out.
you know, you know, you kick it,right?
So it's, it's a universallanguage.
Do I So it's, it's kind of coolthat it, like one ball has

(57:58):
connected the world in thecoolest way possible.
Like, it's, it's so, doesn'tmatter what language you speak,
like everybody knows how to useit.
Yeah.
And so, yeah, I think that's,that's the coolest thing.
And it's like I said, superpowerful way to bring a bunch of
people together.
Yeah.
You guys are huge connectors.
Like, I love it.
Huge.
Yeah.
Like power, power in numbers.
And also like, I think if youget the right core leading it,

(58:20):
you can kind of curate theculture.
Like, I honestly think likepeople's perception of Austin in
the next couple years is gonnabe based on what a group, uh,
there's a.
There's a really good core groupin Austin that's doing some
really good things and they keepbringing in really good people
without egos, with like mindsthat are the same.

(58:41):
And instead of trying to competeor instead of trying to, you
know, get on stage and look atme, it's how can we work
together and change everybody'slives?
And it's like, like last nightwe were at Highbrow Lowbrow.
We were with Matt from the RiserNation podcast.
We were with James and Chip,who, who run Highbrow lowbrow.
All the people we were talkingto.
It's like, wow.
Like there's not an ego in here.

(59:02):
Like these are the people that Iwould, I would go to war for,
you know, I would do anythingfor if they call me, anybody
called me right now, anybody inthat whole circle would call
someone else and be like, Hey,my tire, I got a flat tire.
I'm on the side of the road.
It's raining.
Every single one of those peoplewould rush over there to like,
and there was hundreds do, dowhat they can to help.
Wow.
And so I think.

(59:22):
I think there's a group that'salready locked, and I think the
culture in Austin the next twoto five years is gonna stem
outta that.
Like I really do.
You know, it's, it's pretty coolto be a part of and it's like, I
think we all have super highstandards and I think that's why
Austin's got a really goodchance of not not changing and,
and losing that soul.
It has.
Well, that's the thing.

(59:42):
I think that's, that that wholegroup really cares about what
Austin is gonna become.
It's like we really want thiscity to be somewhere that we all
want to continue to call home.
And so it's like working towardsthat goal and just continuously
like Austin in 10 years is whatpeople here are building it to
be.
You know?
So it's like what we're doingright now is gonna affect Austin

(01:00:03):
in 10 years.
So it's kinda like having thatmindset of, okay, well do I
wanna live here in 10 years?
Like what kind of people do Iwanna be surrounded by?
You know?
So you gotta.
That's like so beautiful.
I feel like you guys just gaveme like a sense of relief cuz
I've lived here for so long andI'm like, please Austin.
Like I don't want it to becomelike LA like a bunch of egos
mm-hmm.
and stuff.
Mm-hmm.
But you're right.

(01:00:23):
Like there's the right people inthe community doing the right
things where if we have that, itshouldn't end up that way.
You know?
That's the goal.
Yeah, exactly.
I think like, I think weembraced change.
Like let's go all in on it, youknow, everybody is so sad that
Rainey's disappearing.
Right.
Well no offense, but the firstbar on Rainey was in 2008.
Like, yeah.
The only reason we, it's notthat new, we noticed, cause

(01:00:44):
that's, that's our littletimeline, right?
Like, we had to kick a bunch ofpeople outta their houses
before, like, why aren't we madat that?
Right.
Like, let's, no, but it waslike, the bars made it really
cool and now all theseskyscrapers are gonna come in
and there's gonna be new barsand it's gonna be really cool.
Like, we gotta embrace that.
I.
As long as, because it'sinevitable.
As long as Austin's culturedoesn't change.
So like, let's, let's go all in,let's let Austin change, but

(01:01:06):
let's keep it super inclusive.
Right?
Like, doesn't necessarily haveto be a bunch of weird hippies
like it used to be, but it'salways been this welcoming place
where it's this, you know, giantmelting pot of all these
different people moving from allacross the country.
I think like the nice thingabout Austin is it's so far away
from anything else.
Like the only cities we're closeto are Austin, are Houston and

(01:01:26):
Dallas, and the people that movethere come here because they
don't want to be there and theywant to be included in our
culture.
Mm-hmm.
Otherwise they would stay.
Other than that, like how manypeople do we know from our home
states?
Like not that many.
Yep.
So it's, when I was in Denver,there'd be this, the group from
Ohio that was there and thegroup from Minnesota, the group
from Wisconsin, the group fromWyoming, cuz they're still close

(01:01:49):
enough where it's like they'reall high school buddies and they
could all go home and stuff likethat.
Here you don't have a choice, sowhoever you run into, Whatever
activity you're at, like that's,that's your group of friends and
you gotta make it.
You gotta make it work.
And I think Austen is soinclusive and welcoming.
That's the culture that it hasand that's, I think, what can't

(01:02:11):
change.
Yeah.
If we wanna keep Austin Austinand grow with it.
Mm-hmm.
So, I mean, we still wanna keepAustin like a little weird, you
know, like, uh, we wanna keep itreally weird.
Yeah.
Keep, keep it original again.
I mean, I just shouted out Jamesand Chip from, from High
eyebrow.
They're the, some of theweirdest people I know as long
as those guys are, are incontrol.
As long as some dude with pinkhair is, is got a, got a little

(01:02:32):
bit of say in it, it's gonna,it's gonna stay weird, but it's
gonna be fun as hell and it'sgonna be open to anybody who
wants to be, you know, part ofsomething special.
Yeah.
Are you seeing like, a lot oftie over between like sphere and
secret disco?
Like people going playing soccerand then coming to like, the
events you're hosting?
Yeah, I think, yeah, I thinkit's kind of intentional.
Like, I kind of wanted all my,all my worlds to collide cuz

(01:02:55):
shoot, I work 80, 90, a hundredhours a week.
You know, I, I don't care.
I'm, I'm probably alwaysworking.
I don't really turn it off andwhen I turn it off, I fall
asleep.
Ask her like I go till I dropand.
I think Antonio from Native likesaid it best.
He's like, I'll work 80 hours aweek, as long as I get to pick
which 80 hours there are andwhat I'm working on.
Mm-hmm.
So for me it's like I'm onlydoing stuff that I'm gonna be

(01:03:17):
involved in.
I'm not, I'm not working 40hours for somebody when they
tell me to.
Right.
Which is, which is kind of nice.
Like I'm on, I'm on my schedule,I'm doing what I'm super
passionate about.
So I'd say like sphere, that'swhy I'm so drawn to Sphere is
because it's not just like thissoccer complex.
It's not just this like fitnessgroup.

(01:03:38):
It's very social, you know?
And it's all about music andenergy and that's what I feed
off of, which is so hard to findat your age.
Secret disco is energy andconnection and people, so it's
like, to me, they're the samething.
They just use different thingsto connect people.
Yeah.
That's amazing.
Like you guys are doing so much.
And I told you the other daytoo, I was like, I feel like you
guys would just be on likecoffee all the time because I

(01:04:00):
don't know how you guys get anysleep.
You guys travel, you have twopets.
You're doing secret disco, youhave Sphere Club, and you guys
both work like legit jobs too.
Yeah.
And and we have, we have likefitness influencer over here.
Like I don't even know how youguys are doing it.
All And she cooks.
She does Are you sure I do cook.

(01:04:24):
Are you sure?
I can't have her.
Tanner.
Hey.
Hey.
I'm not, I'm not selfish.
You can, uh, you can have it.
That's so funny.
Yeah, but like, cuz you guysboth have like separate jobs
too, I thought.
Cuz you know, when I first metyou guys, I thought you guys
were just running like secretdisco and mm-hmm.
you know, cause that's what mostpeople think.
There's a lot going on withthat.
Like, I can't even imagine theamount of work that goes into

(01:04:45):
that.
but you're like an apartmentlocator, right?
Mm-hmm.
So you're always helping peoplelike find apartments and then
you're an engineer, which Iliterally thought you were like
a software engineer.
And then I was like, oh shit.
No.
Tanner's like a real engineer.
Yeah.
Cause software engineers are notreal engineers.
all I work with is like softwareengineers and they play like
Mario Kar at the lunchtime Yeah.

(01:05:08):
The, the term engineer getsthrown a lot.
Like I went to all engineeringschool, but it wasn't like,
those weren't even options.
It was like the actualengineering chemical, mechanical
civil engineering.
So I'm, I've got a civilengineer degree, I do heavy
construction.
So that's, I did tunnels forthree years.
I did skyscrapers for 10 yearsand, and I'm doing like high-end
commercial rebuilds.
So it's, it's real likeconstruction and engineering,

(01:05:29):
not just, oh I'm, I'm anengineer cuz I've got a
computer.
I've gotta go computer.
It's, you know.
Yeah.
But I, I think that helps, like,I think that's made my
intentions so much better forsphere end, for secret disco is
just, cuz.
It's never been, I think if I'vemade the, made the flip for
secret disco.

(01:05:50):
Right.
And you hear entrepreneurs like,don't give yourself any options.
Like go all in.
Right.
If I quit my job and was justdoing secret disco, I think it
would come across kind of fake.
Like I'd just be trying to doeverything for a buck, you know?
And cuz I need it, I rely on it.
Maybe it would turn into a waybetter business, but I think
it'd be a way worse culture.
And so I've been super fortunatethat I've always had a real job

(01:06:12):
as I call it, My, my normal, mynormal seven to five.
Um, but I think that's like,kept me super grounded and like,
kept my intentions really cleanwith, with everything I've done.
Yeah.
What do you guys do when you getlike worn out?
We watched the Blacklist onNetflix.
I like that show Yeah.
I don't really, yeah, like shegets mad at me, so like she's,

(01:06:34):
every night she's like, I neverget off your phone.
And it's not, cuz I'm like justtexting people.
9:00 PM 9:00 PM it's drop thephone.
I thought of this and if I like,if I don't write it down, like
I'm gonna forget, you know?
And so it's like my brain isjust always on, uh, think of the
weirdest stuff at the weirdesthours, but it's like, he'll like
literally will just be likelaying there and like watching
like TV or something and he'lllike grab his phone and do

(01:06:55):
something and I'd be like, whatare you doing?
I look over and he is buyinglike a hundred dolphins on
Amazon Dolphins.
And I'll be like, why are yougenius?
Why are you dolphins?
We, uh, like, uh, blow updolphins.
That's just one example.
for, for last year we did, uh,we bus like 400 people out
Dakota for a concert, so we'relike for a secret disco.

(01:07:17):
Yeah.
Me and a couple of my friendslike getting out Dakota's
miserable.
So like let's get a bus, callthem my buddy s Ninja buses.
And I was like, Hey sticks, uh,I think we want a bus for Coda.
He's like, how many do you have?
I was like, I don't know,probably like 40 to 50.
He's like, well, it's 40 peopleto a bus.
Like, do you want two?
And I was like, well, why don'tI just post on secret disco and
see how many we can fill up?

(01:07:37):
And within hours we filled uplike six buses.
Yeah.
Wow.
And so I was like, how manybuses do you have?
And he is like, I got 10.
I was like, give us all 10.
And so there's three or fourdifferent concerts last year
where we bust 400 people out.
Wow.
It was amazing out out Dakota,but I was.
when we went out to one like afew years ago, we all put name
tags on.
And so when you're walkingaround the whole concert,

(01:07:58):
everybody like knew who youwere.
They just randomly say hi toyou.
And we thought it was fun.
I was like, all right, well it'sgonna be dark cuz this was a
late one.
I was like, how do we know whereall the people who rode out with
us are?
And like, how do we distinguishourselves?
So I bought a hundred inflatabledolphins and passed them out and
we were in the very back on thelawn and you just looked down.
We would just see dolphin andyou just saw dolphins everywhere

(01:08:19):
in there.
And they were like colorfuldolphins.
They they were like rainbowcolor dolphins.
Yeah.
Like rainbow.
Yeah.
That was, that was the best$500I ever wasted.
But that's of at like 10 o'clockat night.
Yeah.
It's like his mind literally isnever off.
Yeah.
And I'll be like, put the phonedown, I'll like look and Yeah.
It's like a hundred dolphins orchickens or whatever it's gonna
be next.
Yeah.
We have a one bed study and ourstudy and a storage unit is

(01:08:42):
literally just full of like,Props at this point and like
costumes as it should be and ahundred dolphins and a hundred
squeaking chickens and all sortsof stuff.
Wild.
And then it's just a simple wayto bring it.
Like it's the same thing we'retalking about, right?
Like it's so easy cuz like, allright, we're filling up 10 buses
with 40 people each.

(01:09:03):
Like you don't know who's onthose other buses.
And if I saw you and I didn'trecognize you, I would never say
hi to you.
Right?
But all a sudden you're dolphin.
If you're holding a dolphin andI'm holding a dolphin, it's
like, oh, you're with the secretdisco bus.
Like, I'm tanner.
And that instantly created thatconversation.
So like almost everything I'mthinking is like these ice
breakers in a way.

(01:09:23):
Like our, we have a partytomorrow at Native, it's called
Kings and Queens.
So it's our Valentine's Day.
And it's sued up just like, likea deck card.
People are gonna actually dressup.
Yeah.
So we're go always dress up.
We're going, we're going suitand tie, but to make this
social, we gamified it a littlebit.
And so everybody as they walk inis gonna draw a card out of a
deck.
And we partnered with CrownRoyal and Titos.

(01:09:45):
And so they actually went tonative and prepaid enough drinks
so that everybody at that partycan walk around, Hey, what card
do you have?
And start talking.
And they need to find theirmatch.
Ah.
And if you find someone with amatching card, you go up to the
bar and you get a free drink.
Actually, that's so cool.
One of you gets a free drink, soyou gotta argue over who's, who
gets the free one, who's pickingup the tab just to make, make it

(01:10:07):
kind of fun.
Um, but it's like, that's,that's an icebreaker, right?
You're gonna go up to someoneyou've never talked to, like,
oh, what car do you have?
You know, it's the fun thingabout dressing up.
Like sometimes you're like, oh,you have the same suit.
I have.
Like, I got it from here.
Did you?
And all of a sudden you'retalking to somebody that you
would've never talked to before.
I mean, I never would've talkedto you guys if I wouldn't have
gone to your event.

(01:10:28):
Like I never would've met eitherof you, and I didn't even really
talk to you guys.
Like I'm very shy, like I'm not,once you pull it out of me, but
I'm not like the person at a barto just like go and start
talking to random people.
I don't know.
You know?
So I see how beneficial yourevents are.
Yeah.
I mean, it definitely bringspeople outta their comfort zone
too.
And everybody's so nice at ourevents too, that just becomes,

(01:10:49):
again, like a big family.
And then it's like before youknow it, you're like dancing
with a bunch of random peopleand it's just.
Okay.
These are like my friends forlife now, you know?
Yeah.
It's fun too, cuz like so manyof our friends, like, they're
excited cuz they know like we'rethe ones throwing it and they're
like, bring their friends andthey're like, Hey, this is this
person.
Hey this is Tanner in Brooklyn.
Like, they threw this party butthey would've never known

(01:11:09):
because we're not on the stage.
Like we're not.
Mm-hmm.
we're not trying to get thebiggest act and be on stage.
Look at me, look at me.
That's like another thing aboutchampagne bottles, right?
Yeah.
We're never you in the back.
Yeah.
We like wanna be like in thecrowd.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We like, we just like talking topeople.
Like I'll, we'll get lost fromeach other all the time cuz it's
just like, Hey, come meet myfriend, come meet my friend.

(01:11:31):
And all of a sudden we're twodifferent ways.
Like, it's, it's pretty cool.
And I'm very much like, he'smore of like the reserved, like
more introverted, but like, likego talk to people that he really
knows or like be introduced.
He's constantly being introducedto different people.
I'm more of the.
Person that runs around and isjust like meeting people.
Cuz I'm a, can you bring me therandoms?

(01:11:53):
I'm an extrovert people, verybig extrovert.
So yeah, I'll just be like,Tanner, meet this person.
This is my friend now.
And like, Tanner, meet thisperson.
This is my friend now.
You know?
And so like, then we're hangingwith them like two days later,
like, yeah, we're having everytime.
I, I am very much like, yes,yes, yes, yes, yes.
Um, but it's like that cat thatlike runs out to the alley and
like brings the mouse back.
No really?

(01:12:14):
like what I found, guess what Ifound?
Like that's funny.
This is part of our house now.
Yeah, pretty much.
But we like bounce each otherout.
Well that way.
Um, but I feel like it reallymakes people feel like more
included, you know?
It's just like, okay, the peoplewere throwing this event are
actually wanting to talk to meand wanting to get to know me
and are now inviting me.
He does a really good job.

(01:12:35):
Personally messaging people onInstagram, like after events and
stuff and being like, thank youso much for coming.
And it was, or it was so good tomeet you.
Or following them on Instagramso like, you're actually seen,
like you weren't just a body atour event, we weren't just
taking your money.
Like, we actually want you here.
You know, you're invited backand we want to be friends with
you.
We want to get to know you.
And so I feel like that's kindof what makes people wanna come

(01:12:57):
back too.
It's like, it's not fake, youknow?
It's, we're doing it cuz wewanna do it.
We wanna have fun with you.
That's where we bounce eachother out.
So, so well is cuz Yeah, the,like one of my favorite parts is
like, uh, we just met like 10new people and it's all cuz she
just like, she identifies peoplewho are either super engaged or
super unengaged, you know?
Mm-hmm.
people in the middle.
Like, you kind of just let B andlet, cuz they were kind of

(01:13:18):
flowing.
Uh, she finds the people thatare super bought in or the
people that just look likethey're kind of left out and she
just like grabs'em and brings'emin.
It's, it's really cool.
Like, we've made, made someawesome friends.
Like, Jamal just messaged melike 10 minutes before this.
He's like, Hey, I'm comingtomorrow.
You know, it's just like, oh, Ilove that.
And.
Jamal message.
Jamal?
Yeah.
Yeah.
He was at our fourth 12.
I owe him a drink.
He messaged me.
He is like, uh, I was goingthrough our text messages and I

(01:13:40):
remembered that you said thatyou, uh, owe me a drink for my
birthday, so drinks on youtomorrow, I was like, okay, You,
you're gone.
So that's like, ah, that's socool.
Like, that's, that's my favoritething about what we do.
It's like we went, we try toclear out like our, the people
we were following on Instagramthe other day were like, which
random accounts are wefollowing?
And it's like, I know a thousandpeople.
Like, what the heck?

(01:14:00):
Like, I went through it all.
I was like, no.
Like, no'em, no, no, no.
'em, no.
I'm like, we like keep in touchwith so many of these people.
Like it's so cool.
Like, Yeah.
It doesn't surprise me.
And if I already like, wasn't sopumped about everything that you
guys are doing, I'm like evenmore pumped after like, sitting
down and like talk, just likegenuinely seeing like where
secret disco came from and likehow it started and how you're

(01:14:20):
like genuinely going around,like making sure people are
like, you know, feeling seen andstuff like that.
It's amazing.
So I'm so excited that you guyscame on the podcast.
Um, I'm so excited that you guysare gonna keep doing events.
I wanna go to more of them.
Um, but I want you guys to pimpyourselves out.
So give us your handles.
I know Tanner, Tanner wants topimp the pets out is like his

(01:14:43):
main goal.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We got, we got the coolest petlineup ever.
We do have cool pets, honestly.
Yeah, we have, we have aDoberman and we have a hairless
cat and they're like the coolestcombo.
They're like best friends.
Like the cat has a kitten.
Like we both like, kind ofwanted the same pets.
I almost got a hairless cat likethree years ago and then I was
moving in with a roommate andKevin was like, I will, I refuse

(01:15:05):
to have a cat, but now he lovesit.
And so I'm like, all right,whatever.
Like I just won't, won't get acat.
Right?
Like it wasn't the end of theworld.
Yeah.
And so now I've finally got thecat, so They're so cute.
So cute.
He's cute.
But yeah, I mean, thanks forhaving us too, by the way.
This is, yeah.
So fun.
Fine.
Most of our conversations are soquick with people.
Mm-hmm.
like even at events and stufflike that.
Mm-hmm.
where it's like, hi, nice toknow you.
Like, hey, let's go out to ashow.

(01:15:26):
Right.
Or a music show or go playsoccer with, it's like hard to
like sit down and actually, youknow, tell people our stories.
Like a lot of people don't evenknow like we were both married
before and stuff like that.
So like, yeah.
Yeah.
This is really cool.
I like good experience.
Yeah.
I like podcasts, like as aplatform.
Cuz I feel like you get to likesit down and have those like
deeper conversations, you know?
Mm-hmm.
because like, I'm that type ofgirl.
If I go to a party, I'd ratherjust like sit on a couch with

(01:15:48):
one person and like fall down ablack hole.
I love that I couldn't do that.
I can't sit that.
No, you could not do that.
Like, I'm like popcorn, justpop, pop popcorn with one or the
other.
But no, thanks for having us.
Yeah.
Um.
Yeah.
Where can people follow you?
Uh, my Instagram's freeze tag.
So my last name's freezing, soit's a little, little play that
I'm freeze tag my brother'sfreeze frame.

(01:16:10):
So we, we had some fun with it.
F R I E S E underscore tag.
And then Sphereclubs@sphere.club.
Secret Discos, secret Disco dotSociety, Brooklyn.
Uh, you can, uh, my main accountis Brooklyn bfi.
Uh, that's Brooklyn.
B as in A B.
And then f i t Brooklyn B Fit.

(01:16:31):
Awesome.
Thank you guys so much.
Like, this was so fun.
Like I haven't got to do apodcast with like two people,
which is, it's Wait, are we afirst?
You're the first.
You guys like popped by threepeople.
Jerry podcast, but I love it.
I wouldn't, there's not anothercouple that I'd rather have on
to do this, so thank you.
Yeah, thank you guys.

(01:16:51):
It's been a lot of fun.
Appreciate this.
Appreciate it.
Yeah, this is like one of mypassions.
So.
So nice to have you guys likehelp support that too.
So, we'll, we'll, we'll helpanywhere I can.
We love what you're doing andhappy to help you know us.
Yeah, so awesome.
This is great.
Well, thank you guys.

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