Episode Transcript
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(00:01):
Premium I'd. Say creamulum.
So good I'm. I'm pumped.
It's it's one of my like what's one of my all time favorite like
Tim and Eric's gets. I feel like I'm more pumped up
for the for these episodes than this, this episode.
Then I eat them for the I'm like, I'm I love it.
I love this. This is great.
(00:22):
Well, it's also I'm always good when it's you and me.
It's like, it's like the old school when I was a guest.
Yeah, yeah. So Cracker.
Cracker Barrel, that's that's not premium content.
That is so funny. Bottom, bottom All right, guys
here on the premium feed you've had your vegetables now, So
let's give him some fucking slop.
(00:42):
Pardon my language. Are we are we apologizing for
language on these or? I I do because my do you know,
my mother listened to the podcast and actually complained.
To me. It's like why?
Why are you? Why are you cursing on the
podcast? I'm like, I don't know.
I'm I'm sorry. I'll go to church.
(01:07):
I'm sorry. I think my father-in-law
listens. I know he listens to like the
main feed ones. I don't know he'll if he'll
listen to the premium ones. But I always wonder, you know,
if is this slowly transforming his, his view of me of like
listening to me just like riff it for an hour Anyway, Cracker
(01:28):
Barrel, the Republic has fallen.This is this is serious.
We need to fucking sober up. Like Cracker Barrel is not a
laughing matter. I gave my life to Christ in that
parking lot. So, so, So what happened?
Yeah. What?
OK, so So what happened? They they changed the logo of
(01:53):
Cracker Barrel, by the way, I would just say I quick Cracker
Barrel anecdote and then we'll do this.
I like Cracker barrel. I like the French toast at
Cracker barrel. I'm I could believe they also
have impossible. I'm pescatarian.
They also have like impossible sausage and I really like that.
I like the French toast with. The that's relatively new.
That was like the last time all these right wing guys lost their
(02:13):
shit at Cracker Barrel is when they introduced the the vegan
meats. So so I spent a lot of time at
the Cracker Barrel at Martinsburg, WV while I was
doing the work for my book. And you wrote the book when I
Yeah, well, we'll April 7th. But we when we when I would use
(02:36):
the toilet there there was a there is in that I'm soon.
It's still there. Someone has etched the the
letters RWDS into the bathroom at the Cracker Barrel at
Martinsburg, which means right wing death squad.
You're familiar. With that, yeah, that's like a
(02:59):
that's that's the. Whole.
Small shooter shit, you know. Yeah, I mean, it's like, it's
such a haunting thing. You go in there and like, you
know, do your business and then all of a sudden you turn to the
left and it's like, God damn, fuck, somebody wants to kill me.
Yeah, did not, did not help withmy mood.
But anyway, they changed the logo.
Then they changed it back. But but this first version of
(03:20):
the logo change, it's very, you know, it to me, it's what this
altered logo says is we were purchased by a venture capital
firm and now there is a new likesomebody's son or daughter has a
new idea about the future of thecompany and has has gone on like
(03:42):
99 designs or one of these, you know, logo making websites.
And it's like this is this is the Cracker Barrel of a new era,
but they got rid of the cracker and the barrel mic.
Yes, they did. It's really very, very, very.
I've been telling you for a weekthat was the most important line
that I had to say during this whole show.
But. I was about to say that it was
(04:03):
the most, you know, challenging thing for white people and in
generations. But it was Byron Daniels who is
a Black mega supporter, who had the really who really spoke to
the importance of this. This is a tweet he posted.
In college, I worked at Cracker Barrel in Tallahassee.
(04:24):
I even gave my life to Christ intheir parking lot.
Their logo was iconic and their unique restaurants were a
fixture of American culture. No one asked for this woke
rebrand. It's time to make Cracker Barrel
great again. And I have to say that when I
was trying to find this tweet and I was Googling it, I came
across this column in some Florida newspaper that described
(04:48):
Byron Daniels as, quote, Republican candidate for
governor of Florida and a formerCracker Barrel employee, which I
nearly lost it when I read. That's his resume.
That's his resume, that's his resume.
It's like cracker Cracker Barrelserver, then mega guy.
Yeah, I love how he says I even gave my life to Christ in their
(05:10):
parking lot. He's describing it like he
fucked his girlfriend in high school for the first time in
the. No, but you want to know the
craziest thing about that part of his tweet is that it's
apparently true. Like, I, I didn't know much
about Byron Daniels. I mean, Ron DeSantis is the
governor of Florida, right? So it's, I mean, this guy can
show up and challenge him if he wants.
(05:31):
But like Ron DeSantis has the money in the backers.
Everybody knows it's just going to be him, barring some like
crazy political upheaval. But this is like part of his,
some speech, part of part of hislike candidate mythology of
like, I was working at a CrackerBarrel and there was a church
group and something, you know, Iwas serving them and something
(05:52):
came over me and I just had to go into the parking lot and take
a minute. And this group came out and
surrounded me and we prayed and I gave myself to God.
So like, this is, this is not like a new thing, right?
It's I, I guess Cracker Barrel, the Cracker Barrel parking lot
is very important to this guy, which I think just makes this
street like 100 times funnier toknow that this isn't just like
(06:16):
performative, like what so many right wing guys do, or it's just
like, this is the downfall of civilization.
Oh my God, what the fuck is happening?
You know, like over everything, you know, like the new Barbie
movie, Ben Shapiro fucking blow a blood vessel off the side of
his head getting pissed about it.
But it's so much funnier to readthis tweet.
(06:37):
You know, I even gave my life toChrist in their parking lot and
know that it was earnest. It's, it's almost cute, you
know? I gave my soul to Satan in the
drive through of the Dunkin' Donuts.